


Focused Madness

by Fusedtwilight



Category: Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Angest, F/M, Feels, Fluff, Leah adopts a hybrid, Leah becomes a mom, Or rather gets adopted, Post-Breaking Dawn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-14
Updated: 2014-10-30
Packaged: 2018-01-15 17:22:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 33
Words: 235,726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1313074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fusedtwilight/pseuds/Fusedtwilight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Several months after Breaking Dawn a hybrid appears in Forks with no memory and a powerful gift. The Cullen's take him in and he quickly forms a bond with Leah. Soon Leah finds herself caring for the young hybrid more and more and must protect him not only from her family but from his own father as well.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Focused Madness

Chapter 1

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing.**

 

 

Unease: mental or spiritual discomfort. Lack of ease. Vague dissatisfaction.

Example: Charlie felt great unease about the child he met at the dinner.

 

 

Charlie P.O.V

Things had been delightedly quiet these last six months.

No reports of missing hikers, no mysterious murders, no sightings of giant mutant wolves in the woods, though I know more about the latter then I care to know.

My life was good now; Bella was married to that Cullen boy, much as I still have a little resentment at him I see how happy she is with him and little Nessie. I know she is Edward's niece but I swear that little girl looks like she comes from Swan stock, if I didn't know any better she had my curly hair and Bella's brown eyes. She also got Rene's energy too.

I know something us up with Bella, something supernatural, he skin, her eyes, her inhuman beauty like the rest of the Cullens. But after seeing Jake transform into a giant red wolf I did not want to know more than I needed, because if I learned no more I would not be able but help throw a major kink in Bella's life, as long as she was safe and happy that is all I need to know.

Also as strange and uncomfortable as it is for me to say I and Sue Clearwater are going strong. Yes I do feel a tad bad for dating Harry's woman, but how could I not? I promised him before he died I would look after her, Seth and Leah were hardly ever home and she was lonely.

After Bella married Edward I spent more time at her house. It just happened; I didn't plan it, neither did she. But when you reach a certain age and are at a point in your life, you just ignore the stuff you would have done as a kid and just go for it.

Sadly my relationship with Sue has put me at odds with my buddy Billy Black who thinks I am disgracing Harry's memory by dating his wife. I have not felt right about Billy ever since Jake's little transformation. All these years I thought all that talk about legends was just his belief in his peoples stories, all these years I think back to times he acted funny when wolves or the Cullens were brought up.

So besides Billy things were looking up for old Charlie Swan.

Until I got a call from Cora, asking me to come to her dinner to pick up an unruly kid. I did not mind, compared to the craziness of the last few years one unruly kid was a welcome change.

I spotted the kid as soon as I stepped into the dinner. He sat on a chair at the counter, he sat oddly, his feet were on the seat and his chin rested on his knees. He had light brown skin and dark hair, I thought he was one of the Quileute kids at first but the bone structure of his face said something further down south.

His hair was dirty and wild, covered in dry leaves and bits of twigs, his skin and clothes had serious mud stains. He looked like he hadn't seen a shower in a long time. I even could smell him, he smell foul, like he had been rolling in something dead. He was eating a sandwich, he kept it close to his mouth like he was afraid someone would run over and snatch it from him.

His eyes darted around left, right, left right very quickly, like he was on the lookout for danger.

Cora came walking over to me, a look of immense relief written on her face. "Thank God you are here Charlie," she said.

"What seems to be the problem Cora?" I asked.

"Charlie, he came in and asked for food. He speaks funny. I don't mean his accent which by the way is obviously from South American. But he is either new to English or has a mental disability and I am betting on the latter."

"Has he threatened you?"

"No, he has been good...but Charlie...he scares me."

"What? Why?" I glanced over at the kid; he appeared to be five or six years old. How can you be scared of a kid that young?

"It's the look in his eye, like he is wondering what I would taste like. It's scary, it's like having a tiger come into your place and sit down at your table. No one wants to go near him either, this place was packed earlier and when he showed almost everyone left. I mean the smell alone could drive them away and if anyone gets to close he hisses at them like a damn cat!"

"Okay, calm down, I'll take him to the hospital, let them check him out."

"Shame about him, he is a real cutie. Get rid of the smell, get him some proper clothes and I wouldn't mind him staying here."

I walked over to the boy, he tensed and glared at me and I froze. I could see what she meant. His eyes were positively wild like an animal. I remember a time when I was young, I went camping with my old man and went to relieve myself in the bushes one night, and I went a bit away from camp to do the deed when I came across a wolf.

It just looked at me; I looked at it frozen in fear. It didn't snarl or make any threatening motions, but the look in its eyes spoke volumes. It was studying me, judging me, weighing me down. If I moved against it, it would kill me, simple as that.

It ran off, I was not going to bother it and it did not need food so it left me alone. I quickly ran back to the tent, having already pissed myself scared.

But seeing this boy's eyes made me remember that wolf and I know if I am not careful this kid will attack me. Ridiculous as it sounds for me to fear this child of six or seven I could not help it, it was like some instinct in my head was telling me my life hanged by a thread right now.

The instinct was so strong my hand inched a bit closer to my gun, a few eyes saw my hand drift towards it and the tension in the dinner raised a few octaves. The boy winced as if he sensed. Then a strange feeling of peace filled me. I was just being silly; all the tension of the last few years was getting to me is all.

I approached the boy more slowly; he was still watching me with that predator look.

"Excuse me son, what's your name?" I asked.

He cocked his head to the side, the aggressiveness left his eyes, replaced by curiosity.

"I be Matthew...are you my daddy?"

I was taken aback. First time someone ever asked me that.

"What? No, I am not."

"Oh...that is okay I am guessing...I have asked a lot of people and they all say no too, you're nothing special." he finished his sandwich and burped loud. Little kid has a nice pair of lungs.

"Where is your daddy Matthew?" I asked.

He glared at me and I flinched. Despite my uneasiness about him I could see what Cora meant about him being a good looking kid. He looked like a little dirty faced angel.

"If I was knowing that I be finding him!" tears filled his eyes and I felt bad for the little tyke. "I not knowing where he went, I know nothing but the fire." he grabbed his head and a deep frown appeared on his face. "The pain, the pain, the never ending fiery pain in my head, it hurted me bad. I have to find daddy so he can make it go away!"

A few of the female customers looked at him with pity; I recognized a few as being mothers. Seeing such a youngling was bringing out their motherly instincts.

"Tell you what Matthew, come with me, I will take you some place where we can get you some help," I said.

I reached out a hand to touch his shoulder. In the blink of an eye a single hand had my wrist in a grip as firm as iron, I gasped as did many other people, he had moved so quick. It was almost a blur. He looked at me oddly, then he brought my hand to his face and he sniffed.

He stood up on his seat and brought his face close to mine and began to sniff me like a dog. "Hey now! Private space!"

He looked at me and let my hand go. "You smell familiar, you smell like something else, something I should know...what is it? Why is it so familiar?"

"If you come with me I will take you some where we can find out," I said.

His eyes lit up, he looked so happy. "Really?"

"Really, in fact we'll go for a ride in my car, you ever rode a policeman's car?"

He looked confused. "I am riding in lots of men's cars, never police...is that the one with the red and blue lights that go whooooooooooooooo!"

"Yep."

"Wow I think that would be fun! I like the metal car thingies, they no go fast as me but it still fun to move when me is not moving meself."

He grabbed my hand and with the strength beyond what he should be capable of dragged me out of the dinner. "Thanks Charlie!" Cora called.

"No problem Cora!" I called back.

I had Matthew ride in the front with me. He liked that, made him feel special he said. As we drove to the hospital I put the windows down, the kid really did smell like something dead. He didn't mind, he didn't seem to be cold at all, in fact I noticed when he dragged me out of the dinner he seemed to be hot, like fever hot. But he seemed okay...physically at least.

I didn't roll the window down all the way, didn't want him to jump out. He seemed to be that air headed.

As we drove he giggled. "Look at us go! Wow...can you make it scream?"

"Scream?"

"You know...whooooooooo."

Smiling I turned the siren on. It made the sound and he squealed in delight and mimicked the sound. "Wow, you are fun. I was going to eat you but I am thinking you be better alive."

"Eat me? Why would you eat me?" I asked thinking he was just playing.

"Because I am getting thirsty silly, you're blood makes the thirst go away. I have been doing it before, before when men take me in their cars or the girls I get thirsty and bite them and they scream and holler then go quiet and cold and dead."

I froze. A cold thread of fear made its way down my back; I looked at him in the rear view mirror and saw madness in his eyes. The kind that let me know he was serious when he said he had killed people. I gulped realizing I had something in my car now that could kill me if it pleased.

But for the moment it seemed to like me and I hoped I could stay on its nice side long enough to live to see another day.

"You are being afraid?" he made it a question. "I no like you afraid, I like you really happy and fun. Lets do that!"

A powerful feeling of delight and joy spread throughout my body, the fear and uncertainty was washed away. I felt better than I have in years! I haven't felt like this since Bella moved in with me, since I married Rene! I didn't care that it was raining in Forks and I had something with me that could kill me! I was in too good of a mood to let that dampen my mood!

"You want to hear the siren again?" I asked him.

He shook his head up and down eagerly. I turned it back on and we both laughed, both making the same noise the siren did. Things were definitely looking up for old Charlie Swan now.

* * *

 

 

Surprise: Astonishment. Being taken unaware.

Example: Carlisle is surprised when he learns a half-vampire is in his hospital.

 

Carlisle P.O.V

Things were going great. Six months since the Volturi incident and things couldn't be better. Edward and Bella was married, and happy with baby Nessie, our relationship with the wolves was better than ever and no one had showed up to cause us harm in all that time.

I was in my office going over some paper work when I heard my name called over the over head speaker. "Doctor Cullen to the mental word immediately!"

The voice sounded panicked. Curious as to why I was needed there I quickly left and made my way to the mental word. I heard the sounds long before I reached the floor, the sounds of shouting and angry yells.

I got off the elevator and the smell hit me. It stood out against the human smells. It was feint, hidden under the smell of death and decay. Dried blood and under that, the feint smell...of a half vampire.

I did not recognize it immediately. The smell of decay had hidden it well, but I knew Nessie's scent well enough to know a half-vampire's scent.

Realizing the enormity of the situation I probably ran faster then I should have. As I turned the hall and went through the doors a most curious sight greeted me, a bunch of nurses and security were gathered outside one of the rooms. The door was shut and they were peering inside curiously. I saw a few of the nurses looking over one of the guards. I spotted Charlie who did not look happy. "Charlie!"

Everyone turned to look at me, looks of immense satisfaction on their faces. "Oh thank God you are here doctor Carlisle!" one of the nurses said.

"What is going on?"

"I'll take it from here ladies," Charlie said.

He led me away from the others, to talk so we could not be heard. The others were peering through the hold on the door, I could hear the halfling's heart beating furiously, had he been human he would be in cardiac arrest right now. I could hear him growling and snarling in the room, obviously enraged.

"Charlie what happened?" I asked him.

"Carlisle...is that kid...not normal?"

I saw the look in his eyes; I knew he somehow knew the boy was more than normal. I had to wonder how much damage he had done and if it was too late for me to do damage control.

"Yes, I can smell it."

He made a face when I said that. I found it amusing he was still disturbed by anything unnatural, but it may be for the best, the less he knew of our world the better; I do not want Aro finding out Charlie had even an inkling of our world.

"Well he popped up at Cora's, you know the dinner right?"

I nodded.

"Well I knew something was up with him, at first I figured he was a homeless kid with mental issues so I brought him here, but on the way I realized there was something off about him, I mean you can tell his is crazy, but he is strong, like a T-Rex or something, he broke Darren's arm."

Darren was the guard who the nurses were checking over. He was six foot one and weighed two hundred and forty pounds, most of that weight being muscle.

"On the way here something strange happened. I got this really happy feeling, I felt like a kid, kind of embarrassing now that I think about it." he blushed recalling his behavior. "Before I was scared of this kid, he was talking about how he considered killing me and then decided not to like he was talking about the weather, so casual. I was seriously scared for my life, and then I was happy and laughing like a moron. Brought him here and had him admitted. Then he got violent, they tried to take blood but the needle wouldn't go through his skin, he began to thrash and it took five guards to hold him down, that's how Darren got the broken arm. He began throwing stuff and this wave of fear hit us and we all left."

Great, not only do I have a feral halfling he may be gifted as well. "Don't worry I will handle it."

We walked back over to the others and I told them to mover. "But Doctor Carlisle, that child is dangerous!" one of the nurses said.

"Listen to her doc, that kid is pumped on drugs of something, look what he did to my arm," Darren said showing me his arm.

"I'll be fine; we need to get him calmed down. Take Darren to the ER." the followed my orders, a few of the nurses escorted Darren to the ER but the rest of the guards stayed behind. I opened the door and quickly closed it behind me.

The halfling peeked his head over the bed, his eyes filled with anger and aggression. He released a deep growl warning me not to get any closer.

"Hello, my name is Carlisle, I am a doctor here."

He said nothing, just continued to glare.

"It is okay, I mean you no harm."

* * *

 

Matthew P.O.V

Me not very happy. Nice smelling man bring me here.

People not being nice to me. Poke and prod me. I am getting mad Thens! Men hold me Down but I ams hurting Them good!

Then yellow man come and he is being nice. I am seeing it. Nice man extra nice he is being. I like him lots. He is being pale yellow. Pale yellow good. Pale yellow is color meaning calm, peace, trust. But flecks of orangeish, yellow. Caution, he was careful, a tab of worry to. I ams making hims worry.

He speaks to me, telling me his name be Carlisle, he is saying he be a doctor. He is saying he means no harm, I believe right away, but me is still growling, letting him know I am mean and nasty and ready to fight.

"You do understand you are risking exposure child. You must know there are consequences for your actions."

I be wondering what he mean when his smell hit my nose. It like man from before, nice man have very feint smell. Smell trigger something deep in head, pas the fire in head, past the burn. I not know where it come from but smell make me think one thing. Daddy!

Me jumps up and walks cautiously to nice man. Caution. He not like me getting to close but me need to smell. Me circle him few times. Smelling him deeply. "Are you my daddy?" I ask him.

He gets confused. "No."

I am disappointed now. Smell so familiar now, I was hoping I had finally found daddy, whoever he is being.

I went to the nice beddy bed to sulk. I am sad now. I was hoping I find daddy. But once again no daddy, just Mr. nice man with nice yellow eyes and yellow hair.

"Tell me young one, what is your name?" he asked.

"Matthew," I say.

"Matthew, what are you doing in Forks?" he asked.

"Forks? Not Forks silly. Room with bed. I cannot be in forks, that sounds painful. Forks are pointy."

"No, I mean the area you are in, this town is called Forks," he said.

"Oh...ohhhhhh!" realization hits me then. "I am sorry, I am so embarrassed now." I got up and his under the bed. "I think I Hide now until me not embarrassed anymores."

From under bed I see him step forward. Pale yellow now mixed with strong curiosity and worry. This worry different. Each emotion is different, millions and millions of different kinds of emotions, so many flavors that crisis, crosses and interconnects, some finer than the edge of my teeth.

He being worried about me? I wonder why that is?

He bend down to speak with me. His face calm and relaxed. "You don't need to hide."

"But me embarrassed," I say.

"Don't be, you just did not know where you are. Where are you from?" he ask.

"Me not know," I say sadly. "Me remember nothing but the fire."

"Fire?"

"The pain, the never ending pain. Like my entire body is filled with lava. It hurt so bad."

I cringe in fear. The memory of the fire hurts. Makes me shiver. He senses me in fear and gives me a nice smile. "It is okay, you are safe now. You asked if I was you're father, why did you ask that? Do you not know him?"

"I do not remember. The fire is all me remember."

"What is the last thing you remember?"

"Waking up alone in the woods...all alone, afraid. Wondering by myself searching for daddy."

"How do you know you have a father if you do not remember him?"

"I not know. I just know I have a father and I must find him, it is important. He is my daddy, he will love me and protect me and keep me safe. I track his smell, there be others like you, only they have red eyes and they really mean to me. But I always scare them off. I make them so scared they scream and shout and run like scaredy cats."

"Wow, that is really special. Matthew, I know what you are. But the thing is no one else is supposed to know. See if they know what you are then they could figure out what I am and if that happens, bad things will happen. I want to take you to my house where I live with my family. We will look after you; we will try and help you find more about you."

Me like the sound of that.

Amazed: Bewildered. Perplexed. To be filled with wonder.

Example: The Cullens are amazed when Carlisle brings home a new member of the family.

* * *

 

Carlisle P.O.V

I drove home with my new charge.

I had to pull a few strings and use some charm, but thanks to my influence and reputation I signed the necessary papers and soon me and Matthew were on our way to my house.

When I say I had to use charm I did have to slyly use my physical appearance to convince the nurses and other staff Matthew would be best off in my care. Having adopted so many children and having a few degrees in psychology, plus a pleading look and a nice smile it didn't take much.

I laughed to myself. When Esme finds out she will laugh too. She knows the ladies at the hospital are attracted to me but she is not bothered. She knows I would sooner rip my heart out than think of another woman like that. Plus she knows they cannot help it, my body is designed to draw in people. Esme has had the same issues with men at places she works at.

I do not blame them, Esme is truly the most beautiful woman in the world, her love and tenderness draws in people like bees to honey.

"You thinking of a love one," Matthew said.

"Yes, how did you know?"

"You glow soft pink. Soft pink is tender feelings. Soft pink is love."

"I was thinking about my wife, her name is Esme."

"Esme? I like that. Esme, Esme, Esme." he played with her name. "Is she like you?"

"She is a vampire yes as is all out family."

"Vampire? What is vampire?"

"That is what we are. Well me and most of my family."

"Than what am I?"

"You are a half-vampire. You're father was a vampire, but you're mother was human."

"My mommy? Where is my mommy? Why would she leave me all alone?" he asked me, his face sad and his lips pouting.

I was worried. How do I explain his mother was more than likely dead? That he was most likely what killed her.

"You are thinking dark thoughts," he said. "What is wrong?"

"Your mother...went away. She can't come back. But one day you will find her again in a better place," I said.

He looked at me curiously. He squinted his eyes at me curiously. "I see truth in you. So if you say mommy will meet me again I will believe you. I can't wait, maybe daddy is with her."

I had to be careful with this child, he obviously had a power like Jasper's, this could make keeping him in line tricky.

I had already called ahead to tell Esme we were expecting a special visitor. I explained the circumstances and she said she would let the others know.

"Are we going to eat soon? I am thirsty."

"Yes about that, tell me Matthew what do you eat?"

"People silly," he said with a smile.

"Well Matthew in our house we do not eat people."

"Why not?" he asked.

"Because we do not want to, instead we eat animals."

"Animals?"

"Yes, that is why my eyes are yellow instead of red like the other vampires you met. This is a big rule in our home Matthew, you must drink animal blood. We have some...neighbors we promised we would not drink human blood, if you break this rule I will be very upset with you and so will they."

He put his finger to his mouth. "I promise Car-Car, I'll be good."

"Good."

We continued driving and I wondered who this young man was. Why didn't he remember his past? Where was his father? Was the cause of his condition this fire he spoke of? What caused this fire? So many questions. I hope we can find the answers and give this young man the help he needs.

* * *

 

Esme P.O.V

The house was a flurry of activity.

I had already informed the others Carlisle was bringing home another half-vampire. We were all amazed a lone halfling had made his way to Forks. Nessie was delighted at the idea of meeting another like herself; the only other halfling she met was the young man Nahuel.

We waited in the living room, Nessie was so excited. "I cannot wait to meet him!" she said.

"Neither can us dear," I smiled at her.

"Poor thing, running wild all alone," Alice said.

"I know, terrible isn't it," I said.

The poor dear, how frightened he must have been, so alone and confused. No memory of his past, not knowing what he really was. I hope we can help him.

We heard Carlisle pull up, the fast beating heart of a half-vampire could be heard. "He is gifted," Edward said, his face amazed.

"What do you see?" I asked.

"He can see emotions, he see's and feels emotions. He is like Jasper only he can see them as well as feel them."

"Wow the world must seem pretty psychedelic to him," Emmett joked.

"Emmett," I lightly chastised.

"No he is right. To him we all admit colors that represent our emotions. Rather beautiful actually."

The door opened downstairs and we could hear them walk up the satires. "Alright everyone lets meet our guest. Remember he is not all together so try and be patient and do your best not to hurt his feelings," I said.

Carlisle and the young man walked in, I had to fight the urge to cover my nose. The boy smelled horrible, first thing he needed was a bath. I knew the smell all too well, dried blood. Rotting flesh. Dear lord in heaven I could understand the blood but why the rotting meat?

I wanted to go to him and hug him and kiss him. His cloths were torn and dirty and covered in mock, his hair was so long it reached his bottom. He looked around at us, scared, unsure.

"Hello every one, this is Matthew, he is going to stay with us," Carlisle said with a smile.

"Hello Matthew, my name is Esme." I walked forward to greet him, I bent down and smiled at him, I did not breathe, the smell was so bad. First thing on my list, bath him, burn his cloths, then find him something nice. We were going to have to have him were some of the boy's shorts. We had nothing his size but that could be easily fixed.

I cursed how tall the men all were. They were all in the six foot range; any of their clothes would be like a circus tent on this poor thing.

Matthew smiled at me. "You are really beautiful, are you an angel?" he asked.

"Amazing! He can see her compassion, her light, it is so beautiful," Edward said.

"You see the light too?" Matthew asked looking at Edward.

"Yes. I see it because you see it," Edward said.

Matthew looked at him puzzled. "You are different." he looked at Jasper, Alice, Nessie and Bella. "They are different as well." He frowned at Bella. "Why can't I see you? Where is the light? Are you dead?"

It was obvious he could not see past her shield. "No, I have a gift that protects my head from gifts like yours," she said with a smile.

"That's really weird...but really cool to. You're pretty to."

"Why thank you," Bella said.

Nessie skipped over. They stood facing one another. Then they began to circle one another, sizing one another up. Judging, weighing. I knew it was something even human children do when they meet other new children, but this had a flavor of vampire instincts as well, I could see it in their movements, I hope this doesn't turn violent like with newborns.

Finally they stopped and seemed satisfied with what they saw. Nessie held out her hand. "Hello, my name is Renesme Cullen."

Matthew seemed puzzled by the greeting. He held up his hand imitating hers and she took it and shook it. "What is this?" he asked.

"It's what grownups do when they meet one another," she said.

"Why?"

She paused. "I don't know. It's a grown up thing."

He studied her. "You taste different."

"Taste? But you haven't bitten me."

"Not in my mouth, in my head. You don't taste like them." He pointed to us. "You don't taste like the other people. You taste something new...I like it." he smiled.

"I am like you, I am a half-vampire too."

"Really? I never met another like me before."

Everyone took turns meeting him, after shaking hands with Nessie he wanted to shake hands with everyone. He seemed to like everyone. Rose I could tell already had a soft spot for him; I could see it in her eyes. She had a soft spot for children.

Nessie stood by him the whole time. I had a feeling we would be hard pressed to keep them apart. Being the only two half-bloods was bound to cause some primal instincts to occur. I noticed how much taller and older looking he was compared to Nessie. He appeared to be six or seven. Nessie was eight months old, but she looked between three or four.

I noticed his eyes were a coffee brown color. They were filled with emotion, one minute curiosity, than delight, scrutiny. He never lost that wild look in them however. No matter what the feral instincts remained in them.

Jasper shook Matthew's hand next. Matthew froze and he looked at Jasper more closely. "You are like me," he said.

"What do you mean?" Jasper asked.

"You can feel them to, the lights, the colors. I can tells you senses them as well."

"Can you tell what the others can do?" he asked.

Matthew shook his head. "Nope, I know they be special like you, me, Nessie, but I don't know what they do. You taste familiar in my head. I know you being like me."

Well Matthew was proving to be more talented than we thought. I had Alice run off to get some proper clothes for the boy; me and Rose went and gave him a bath. Matthew loved the bath; he had never been in a bathtub before. We added bubbles which made him squeal in delight.

We had to empty and refill the tub however, he was so dirty the water quickly turned near black. He was amazed to watch the water go down the drain. After the bath we cut his hair, he was a little fussier about that.

It was a little difficult to cut his hair, it was tougher than normal human hair but we managed. Carlisle brought some blood bags up from the basement to feed to him. He told Matthew this was the only time he was allowed to drink human blood.

Matthew readily drank down the blood; the all too familiar look of pleasure crossed his face. Alice came back home with some clothes. By the time we were done Matthew looked like a nice young man. He was clean, his hair was appropriately short, and he smelled so much better.

Than Carlisle took him to the basement to run some tests. Than when that was over I cooked him and Nessie some lunch. He like Nessie didn't like the food much, like Nessie he preferred blood. Soon night began to fall and it was soon time for bed.

Nessie wanted to sleep over and Bella and Edward agreed. At around nine we had them tucked in on the couches ready for bed.

"I don't want to sleep," Matthew said, "I have bad dreams."

"You need to rest, if you have any bad dreams call out for anyone of us and we will be there."

"You promise?"

"I promise."

I kissed him on the forehead. "Thank you Es-Es."

I smiled at the nickname he gave me. I gave Nessie a peck on the head and turned the lights of on the way out. I went to meet with the others in Carlisle's office. We had a lot to go over.

 

**Fusedtwilight: Well who is Matthew? Where did he come from and what made him so crazy? Please stay tuned and review.**


	2. Chapter 2

Focused Madness

Chapter 2

 

**Fusedtwilight: And here is the new chap, thanks animegirl kiki, you rock.**

 

 

Satisfaction: Fulfillment of want or need, the quality or state of being satisfied,

Example: Leah is satisfied with her life now.

Leah P.O.V

Earlier that day

My life had improved. I was no longer in Sam's pack which helped my attitude a lot. No more how sad he is he hurt me, no more how bad he feels for hurting Emily, no more how much he loves Emily and how wonderful and beautiful she is then guilt he thought that and I heard.

I was the first ever girl wolf in La Push history, I was now the first beta female wolf. I was in another pack with fewer guys in my head, I had been taking yoga like I told Jake I would, it had been helping quiet a bit. I enjoyed it more than I thought I would to. The peace, the isolation, plus it helped me stay in shape.

I was still a bitch don't get me wrong, it wasn't like I had an instant change and was suddenly all forgive and forget. I still had a whole shit load of issues. First and foremost I was still in love with Sam. Pathetic I know but that is love for you. No matter what you do, no matter how much time passes it sticks to you like tar. Even if you manage to clean it off it leaves a black mark that can never be cleansed.

I have learned to hate him, god I have learned to hate so well. When he sent Jared to try and get me to come back by having him use his old pet name for me I was filled with rage and hope. Rage he would use such a low blow; use a name he gave me when I was in his heart, a name he had not used since he imprinted. Hope that maybe after all this maddens the imprint would magically break.

I growled and flashed teeth, Jake and the others saw the rage, but Seth who was phased at the time saw my hope. He said nothing. He knew my hope was just that. Hope. Nothing more, nothing less. He knew it was just wishful thinking, he knew how much I had loved Sam, he had seen us together, he knew why I still hoped, why I still needed to hope.

I had more issues than just Sam; there was my father, my sweet, sweet loving father who I liked. I didn't actually do the deed, but seeing his sweet baby girl turn tall, furry and deadly was too much for his heart to handle. That and those fucking greasy foods didn't help either!

It wasn't even a year after dad died and mom hooked up with Charlie Swan! I liked Charlie, even though his daughter brought all this misery down on me and my tribe, Charlie was like an uncle to me, he was a good man. But the fact he and mom were going out was just wrong, Sue was his best friend's wife.

There had been some big fights between me and mom about that. Seth stayed out of it for the most part. He was happy mom was moving on and chose someone like Charlie. He wasn't exactly thrilled about it either but that's Seth for you. He only got involved when I was getting too angry or the fighting needed to stop.

Last but not least my inability to have children. Since I phased no period. I have not actually had sex since Sam (which made me horny as hell and did not help my mood) so I cannot be certain. I mean I am no longer human; I am something new, a freak among freaks. I have considered going out with other men but the idea just does not appeal to me.

I am in no hurry, after the Sam incident I would not be ready for love for a long time. Sex how ever...well what's a one night stand mean besides sex? Sex sounds good, sex sounds reallllly good.

The only problem with that was if any of the guys had found out I would die of embarrassment. It was none of their business but with the wolf mind thing secrets were hard to keep.

I was in my room doing yoga, I was in my yoga outfit, I was on my mat, I had the music playing and I was doing my breathing exorcises. The yogi helped keep my rage at bay, helped it stay bottled up longer. But even yoga can't make it go away. It's always there in the back of my mind, waiting for someone or something to poke at it.

Tonight I was going to patrol with Seth. Now that Jake imprinted on Nessie Sam and his pack could not attack her or the Cullens. That law about wolves being forbidden to hurt another's imprint saw to that.

Sam had no desire to kill Nessie or the Cullens, now that we know she isn't going to be some crazy, blood thirsty monster. Sam had a lot on his plate right now. I admit a part of me enjoyed seeing him suffer; hell hath no fury after all. Because of the surge of vampires Sam had seven new wolves in his pack. They were young, younger than Collin and Brady.

His pack was twelve wolves. I thank god I jumped ship. The thought of sharing the minds of such a large pack of guys, men and boys made me shudder. I felt bad for the kids though, they had a hard time controlling their instincts because they are so young and Sam isn't exactly the most understanding alpha. He showed them no quarter. He was hard on them as he was on us.

We had to tell the parents of course. Rebellious teenagers running off in the night was one thing but a bunch of kids? Sam had to be fair, in letting the kids parents know he had to allow the others to tell their parents. I know Collin and Brady did, I don't know about Paul and Jared.

We were considering having the kids home schooled. They were just to young to deal with the anger the wolf gene brought with it. Which was a problem because unless we got them to control it they will keep phasing and not age, not that that is an issue seeing how they look like young teenagers already.

I was satisfied with life now. I should be happy or pleased but to be happy I would have to not be a wolf, dad be alive, be able to have kids and have a man in my life. Since I could only work on two of those problems satisfaction would have to work.

I heard Seth come to my door and knock. "Come in," I said.

He came in and closed the door. "Hey sis, we still on for tonight?" he asked.

"Yes, it's our night to go."

Since there were two packs we helped Sam's pick up the slack. The kids who phased were too young to be patrolling. That and their mothers refused to allow them to stay up past nine so they got to work the day shift. Lucky little shits.

"Who are we patrolling with tonight?" I asked.

Please not Sam, please not Sam.

"Jared."

Thank you sweet merciful Jesus.

"And Sam."

Fuckberries. I hated patrolling with Sam, since we came back home I have been doing my best to avoid Sam like he was the plague. I only saw him when we patrolled or when I went with Jake when he and Sam talked alpha businessmen. I know he wanted to talk to me; there were times I would catch him looking at me, trying to tell me with his eyes he wanted to speak with me. He had approached me before but I brushed him off. I have nothing to say to him, we have gone beyond words now.

"I am really proud of you Leah," Seth said smiling at me.

"For what?"

"For this." he pointed to the yoga mat. "You are learning to control your emotions. Remember how no one thought you would? Well here you are proving them wrong."

Yeah I remember how they would joke and say I would never stop phasing because I would never stop being an angry bitter bitch. They were right, I was still a bitch and still bitter but I was learning to control it so fuck them and the wolves they rolled in on!

"Thanks Seth," I said. Seth was such a good brother, he always looked out for me. It wasn't easy I deserved I lot of the scorn I got from the others.

I was miserable and I had to make the others miserable as well. I kept on insulting Quil about Claire, I called Jake weak for pinning after Bella (which was calling the kettle black I know) I kept on bringing up the fact Embry was related to either Quil, Jake or Sam because I loved how uncomfortable it made everyone. Plus when people started feeling to sorry for me I liked to shift the focus off of me.

After the Volturi left and we had a close brush with death I tried to make amends with Quil and Embry, they had joined our pack and as their beta I felt I owed it to them. I didn't want them to think I was going to be the old Leah; I wanted to show them I was the new Leah, the one who had moved on beyond pain and self-pity.

It was part of my own personal twelve step program to stop being a bitch. First I got all the guys in our pack together and apologized for being such a bitch. I apologized to Quil for calling him a pedophile, I apologized to Embry for calling him a bastard and bringing up his father issues. Having lost my dad I should have known better to insult someone's father, even if they didn't know who they were.

I apologized to Seth for making things difficult for him. I realized the pack was a way for him to move beyond dad's death and he should have enjoyed it, not have had me to worry about, not having to spend the most of his time apologizing to the others for my mistakes and defending me when I fucked up. I apologized for not helping him when he was in pain about dad's death.

I apologized to Jake for bringing up Bella and mocking him for it. I explained I knew he really cared for her but I knew she loved the leech more and I did not want him to go through what I did and I promised I would be a good beta.

The looks on their faces was priceless. They all accepted my apologies, Seth gave me a hug, the others tried to but I glared at them and they kept their distance, a nice pat on the back was all I let them give me. Jake was pleased, my little _please forgive me_ talk convinced him I was fit for the job of beta.

"One thing I cannot wait for is those kids to grow up, than we can retire and go back to being normal," I said.

"How can you want to be normal Leah? After everything we have seen and done how can you want to be normal?"

"Living my days hunting vampires and ripping them to shreds isn't how I want to spend my days Seth," I said.

 _No matter how good it feels._ I thought.

"It's not just that Leah, what about the speed? The freedom of being a wolf."

I sighed. Seth was still so psyched at being a wolf after all this time. He just couldn't understand how I would want to be normal and not know about the real world. He was young; he had a major case of wonder lust. He could not understand that some people need normalcy in their lives.

But frankly what normal life could I have? Even if I stop phasing I will still be a wolf. I will always be faster, stronger, and have better senses than humans. I would always have this temp and I would never have kids. I figured with the kid part if I did find that special someone or that special imprint we could always adopt. I was still to young to worry about kids, I had another ten years before I reach the settle down age.

Little did I know that this night I was going to settle down quicker than I thought.

* * *

 

Now

Carlisle P.O.V

Esme joined us in my study. Nessie and Matthew were tucked in and sleeping.

We began to discus Matthew and his existence. "He has venom, I did the tests, he has the same number of chromosomes as Nessie, same heart beat, he has blood, he has the speed and the strength. And judging from his height and maturity I have judged he is roughly little more than two years older than Nessie," I said.

"But where did he come from?" Bella asked.

We all looked to Edward. "He does not know. He just woke up one night alone in a jungle. He has no memory of his past except for an intense burning pain." Edward shuddered; Bella placed a hand on his to comfort him. "I have never felt anything like it; it is like the pain causes only much, much worse."

"Worse than Jane's? What could be worse than Jane's power?" I asked.

He shrugged. "I do not know, but it explains why he is unhinged so badly, it is not living in the wild and living off humans, it is the pain."

"Oh that poor child," Esme said softly.

"What caused the pain? Could it have been his father?" Jasper asked.

"Why would a vampire sire a child, put him through such torture and leave him to wonder the world by himself?" I asked.

"Wait, Edward said he was from a jungle right?" Rose asked. "Who do we know that lives in a jungle?"

"Nahuel! The other hybrid, and his aunt," Emmett said.

"Maybe they are related," Alice suggested.

"But he said he only had sisters. Remember he said so when he came here to testify for us," Jasper said.

"Yeah but that was like decades ago, for all we know his daddy has had a ton more kids. We know they grow much quicker than human babies do," Emmett said.

"Hmm, maybe we should contact Nahuel, see if he has heard anything about his father," I suggested.

"Didn't Aro say they were going to pay a visit to Nahuels father?" Bella said.

"Yes. But still Nahuel might have a clue as to Matthew's paternity. It may give us a clue as to his past an-"

"Oh no!" Edward said in horror, he ran down stairs and we followed. Nessie was still on the couch, sleeping peacefully. But the couch where Matthew was sleeping was empty and the window was wide open.

"He is going to feed! We need to find him!" Edward said.

"I told him not to hunt humans!" I said quickly.

"Carlisle he is hunting animals, and tonight the wolves are patrolling."

I had Jasper, Edward and Esme follow me as we tracked Matthew. Jasper and Esme had the best chances of calming Matthew down and Edward could track him. I prayed to god we could get to him before he came across one of the wolves.

* * *

 

 

Confusion: The state of being confused, an act or state of being confused.

Example: Matthew is confused when he finds a large wolf in the woods.

 

Matthew P.O.V

Matthew was bored.

He was trying to go sleepy sleep and he did at first but than dreams start, the fire in him, burning him, the screaming, the pain. Matthew woke up. Matthew stay quiet to not wake Ness-ness. I like Ness-ness, she is much fun. She told me much about her family and about her Jacob.

Her Jacob is really tall with black hair, reddish skin and being really strong. She said he tastes real good. I wonder if she would share, we can bite him together. That is sounding fun.

Me got thirsty and wanted blood. Me decide to go hunt animals for food. Car-Car says no more humans now so I am hunting animals nows. Me be backs soons, not wanting to make others worry. They are being different than the others I have met before. The others were red eyed and meaner than Cullen's. Cullen's smile and hug and laugh.

Other vampires are mean, they try to hurt me, they try to bite and hurt but Matthew makes them afraid and they run screaming.

Me go out window all sneaky like, not wanting to be caught. Careful to not wake Ness-Ness, me sensing sleepiness from her. Dark purple is tiredness. Dark purple means sleep.

Me goes into woods, me leaves scent on trees as me runs to find way back home so I am not being lost. What should me being eating? Squirrel? No too short, me want something big and juicy.

Lots of rabbits running around, bigger than squirrel but not big enough. Me try and decide what to hunt when me caught bad smell. It be musky and reminded me of doggies. I have image in my head than, something like a dog, only less domestic, more predator...wolf? Yes wolf!

But it is not being wolf like I have smelled before. There was a very distant human smell in this scent as well. Maybe wolfie ate human...than I should eat wolfie! Make sure wolfie not eat humans no more! Yay I am going to eat wolf! They big enough oh yes.

Following the scent I went further and further away from Cullen's home, making sure I scent marked the trees. As I got closer and closer to wolfie smell more wolfie smells joined it. The area smelled bad with wolfie smells. Me not knowing what made Cullen people want animal blood, it not even smell nearly as good as human blood. Mmmmmm human blood. (drool)

I could hear wolfie in the distance. Me hear his heart beating. Me climb trees to spot him, he was by stream of water taking a sip. Wolfie was yellow like sand. Wolfie was big...really big...bigger than any wolf Matthew is ever seeing! Matthew excited now, wolfie have lots of blood for Matthew to be drinking.

The wind blew and wolfie froze. He bring head up, water dribbling down chin. Pale yellow means calm, but when red is mixed in with yellow it means alert. Wolfie is knowing I am hear. Maybe he is catching scent when wind blows.

Something odd about wolfie to. Wolfie tastes like more than himself. I play with him in my head, I sense him but I sense others like a faint echo, one in particular was strong in him. I felt that part that was strong in him, it tasted female. What is wrong here? This never happen before. Why would another's emotions be in another? Why would a girl be in a boy?

First me find vampires who drink animal blood, and have yellow eyes and are nice. Than me find girl me not see, than me find another girl who is like me now me finding big wolf who tastes kind of humany and has other emotions in him? This Forks place has lots of fun surprises!

Wait...wolfie does have a humanie flavor. Why does wolfie have humanie flavor? No other wolves have humanie flavor.

Wolfie was looking for me, his eyes looked smart, like there was more than a wolfie in them. He was moving his head to side to side like he was listening for something. He be looking for me, me is thinking.

Me jumped from the tree and stepped toward wolfie. Wolfie crouched and growled at me. Light red and orange, caution, flecks of black red willingness to kill. Wolfie knew I was a threat, he was ready to fight and kill. Silly wolf cannot hurt Matthew. Matthew fight many animals before, none make it.

Me decide not want fight, me to hungry to fight. Me radiate peace, calm, serenity. The wolf calm. Me feel other emotions in hims still cautious, only now tinged with shock and fear. But wolfie was looking and feeling calm now, peaceful. Than a most wonderful thing is happening. Wolfie is turning into human.

"What? What happened?" man said.

He was naked. He had skin like copper and black short hair, he is being tall and buff like Em-Em only not as much.

"Why did I phase back? Why can't I phase back?" he looked at me and realization and accusation bled into his colors. "It is you, you are doing this to me."

I stared at him amazed. Wolfie turned into naked man? Where did wolfie go? I cannot eat man if he is not wolfie. He still smells like wolfie, he still tasting like wolfie, but the female emotions are almost gone now. They still be in him with other emotions but all are a faint echo now, almost not noticeable.

I put finger to lips and sit on ground trying to think. Carlisle say no humans for eating, but this naked man obviously not jut human, does that mean I am allowed to eat?

"What do you want?" man is asking.

"Are you wolfie?" I ask.

He looked at me, confusion and caution are mixing with the calm and peace I wove into him. "I was a wolf. What did you do to me?"

"Me was making you calm so you not fight Matthew...but you human now and Carlisle is saying no humans for eating," I say.

"Wait you know Carlisle?" he ask.

"Yes, Car-Car take Matthew and promise to take care of Matthew. He say no more humans but me hungry so me sneak out and try find animal to eat. Me going to eat you because you so big and have lots of blood but now you man so me wonder if me get in trouble for eating you?"

He use one hand to cover himself while other hand bring up bag he had attached to leg, he pull out pants and put thems on.

"I am friends with the Cullen's, you are in La Push, you do now how dangerous that is for you right?"

Memory come back of Car-Car speaking of neighbors.

"Ohhhh, are you neighbors Car-Car speak of? Ones he promise not to drink human blood to?"

"I am one of them, now we need to get you out of hear before-"

Just than something large came rushing from the woods. It another wolfie. Only this one is silver and slimmer than male wolfie had been. She snarl, dark red, anger. Black red, killing intent. Me stand up and snarl and female wolf because she taste like female and she taste like female in male wolfie.

"Leah no!"

* * *

 

Attachment: The act of being attached, the physical attachment of one thing to another.

Example: Leah forms an unwanted and physical attachment to Matthew.

 

Leah P.O.V

I and Seth had been patrolling.

We had met Sam and Jared and phased quickly. Sam gave me the look that said he wanted to speak with me but I quickly phased and ran.

It was boring as usual; no vampires had been through since the Volturi. Than Seth had caught a scent while he was drinking from the stream. He did not know what it was, it smelled like vampire and human like Nessie, but the scent of the Cullens was also drifting through the wind. Then that little boy jumped out from the trees, his eyes wild and blood thirsty.

Seth got into wolf mode and I rushed to meet him, than something odd happened. A wave of calm and serenity more powerful than anything I have ever felt hit Seth and before I could scream no he phased back.

I quickly made my way to his location and found him dressed in sweat pants talking to the little boy who was sitting on the ground. As soon as I popped up the little boy was on his face snarling at me like a little beast.

He was dressed in a pair of shorts that was way too big for him, I could smell the other leeches coming off him.

"Leah no!" Seth shouted.

He came up beside me and put his hand on my to calm me. I did not take my eyes off the boy who was now looking at me curiously.

"Leah he is with the Cullen's! He is a hybrid like Nessie can't you smell it?"

I could faintly from the smell of the Cullen's wafting from the boy.

"Leah? Her name be Leah?" the boy asked.

He was looking at me like he was seeing something I could not see, I did not like it. It made me feel like he was peering into my soul or something.

"Yes, she is my sister," Seth said.

"I like her, she is pretty," the boy said.

He had a smile on his face and took a step forward and I growled a warning. He frowned. Than the familiar wave of calm and serenity hit me and before I knew it I was phased into a human. I tried to be angry, I tried to bring up that rage that existed in my heart and mind that allowed me to shift but I just could not. It was like the rage was damned up but a dam made of solid metal it could not leak through.

The boy's eyes grew wide at my nakedness. "Me never see girl naked before...where is your thing?" he asked.

A wave of horror and embarrassment hit me. I quickly hid behind a tree and dressed myself. I pulled the bag off my leg and dressed. I came back out feeling annoyed. Annoyed but not angry. Odd.

"Seth what is going on?" I asked.

"I don't know, from what I have gotten from him Carlisle found him and told him not to drink animal blood, he saw me as a wolf and was going to eat me," Seth said.

He was so calm, so cool. Like this was not a serious thing. I know Seth is a laid back guy but this is a little much even for him. We have a potentially dangerous being in front of us and we are not even phased to defend ourselves.

Something was off about this kid; it was not the look in his eyes that clearly said no one was home. It was my inability to feel anger. All I felt was calm and peace, although a bit cautious and annoyed a little child had seen me naked.

"Seth are you feeling to calm?" I asked.

"Yep, you can't phase can you?" he asked me.

"Nope. Think it's the kid?"

"His name is Matthew and yes, why else can't we feel anything but calm or phase?"

"Think he is like Jasper?"

"Maybe, Jasper could never make me feel this calm," he said.

"I know."

Matthew stepped closer to us and I did not feel nervous or endangered, just calm.

"You Seth and you Leah?" he asked us. We nodded. "Me Matthew." he held out both hands, we looked at one another and took his hands in our. I winced a little at his grip. He shook our hands vigorously. "I am being happy to see you, I am being sorry for trying to eat you Seth-Seth."

Seth-Seth?

"No problem Matthew, we should probably get you back to the Cullen's now."

A howl ripped through the night. It was Jake. I wanted to phase and call back but I was to calm. "Matthew can you undo what you have done to us?" I asked.

"Okay."

In the blink of an eye it was gone. The damn burst and all the anger and frustration came running through. I staggered under the weight of it all. For a few moments I had known such peace and calm, than I got hit by all the bad shit I felt and it felt like I got punch in the heart.

Matthew frowned, he did not look happy. "So much anger, so much bitterness, so much pain. How do you live with it all?" he asked.

I pulled my hand out of his and snarled at him. I went to go behind the tree as another of Jake's howls ripped the air. I heard a sound and saw Matthew was following me. "What?" I snapped.

He hugged me around my middle and I froze. "Don't be sad Lee-Lee," he said.

"Don't call me that!" I snarled at him. He flinched like I struck him.

"It will be okay, Matthew is hurted as well, Matthew knows pain and loneliness too."

Jake howled and he sounded close by. I could faintly hear the sound of paws hitting the earth. I grabbed Matthew and with much effort tore him from my body. "Look just be quiet okay," I said.

He nodded. "Good."

Jake came rushing through the woods with Jared and Sam by his side. "Ohhh, more wolfies," Matthew said with a giggle.

Jake went behind a tree, I heard him phase and a moment later he came back in a pair of shorts. "Leah I tried calling you, why didn't you answer?"

"We couldn't phase Jake, Matthew stopped us from phasing," Seth said.

"Who?" Jake asked.

"This thing," I said pointing at Matthew who had a strong hold on my hand. He was staring At Jake in wonder.

"Wow, you are really tall, Nessie was right."

Jake's eyes softened when Nessie's name was mentioned. Stupid imprinting power.

He walked over and bent down so he could talk to Matthew. "The Cullen's are looking for you, they are very worried."

Matthew flinched. "Me sorry, Matthew got thirsty and I am not allowed to be drinking humans so me went hunting and found Seth-Seth and thought he would be good for eating than me made him calm so he not fight back and he turn man and me got confused on if I was still allowed to eats him or nots and than Leah-Leah came and me mades hers not angry to and she turn human." he smiled and giggled a sound like wind chimes. "Me saw her naked, me seen her boobs."

"Watch it!" I glowered at him.

Seth, Jake and Jared chuckled. Jared was still in wolf form so it sounded like a T-Rex was laughing. Then he stopped and glanced at Sam who did not look happy at all.

"Sorry Leah-Leah," Matthew said.

"Why do you call her Leah-Leah?" Jake asked with a smile.

"Me called her Lee-Lee but she got really mad and a little sads so mes nots callings her Lee-Lee because she is so full of sadness and pain and me nots wants her sad or in pain."

He wrapped his hand around my legs and hugged. I felt like I was being crushed by a giant anaconda. I saw Jake look at me and look away, I saw a knowing look in his eyes. He knew why I didn't like being called Lee-Lee they all did. I saw Sam shift his weight. I dared not look at him.

Matthew suddenly let go and grabbed Jake's hand. Jared and Sam took a step forwards and let out low growling sounds, ready to spring. Matthew sniffed Jake's hand, than he licked it. "Nessie say you taste good. She say she bite you and you let her. Do all wolves taste good?"

His question was innocent but a stirring of something dark and deadly moved behind his eyes. One moment he was a sweet inhumanly beautiful child now I was being reminded what he was.

"No, wolves do not," Jake said firmly taking his hand out of Matthews grip.

The look faded replaced by disappointment. "Aww. If Nessie said it was okay could I bite you to? I want to know what you taste like. She says it's really good."

"No biting, or else we will tell Carlisle, understand?" I said firmly.

He looked at me and nodded. "Yes Leah-Leah, Matthew will be good, promise."

"And stop calling me Leah-Leah, the name is Leah, understand?"

"Okay Leah." he smiled proud he said my name just once.

We walked to the edge of the treaty line. Seth suggested we phase and run there, Matthew liked the sound of that, but Jake said we could just walk. I thought it was a good idea. Matthew seemed to be to wild and unpredictable to allow him to ride us. What if we were running and suddenly Matthew decided he wanted to try a nibble of wolf flesh? Who's to say he would stop at a nibble?

I remember that look in his eyes. I had seen that look in many vampires' eyes. That cold, wild inhuman look that had nothing to do with humanity and all to do with instinct. This kid was nothing like Nessie. Nessie was refined, disciplined. This kid had obviously been raised in a different environment altogether.

Matthew held my hand as we walked, he was quit the chatter box. He was talking all about how he met Carlisle. I wondered how Carlisle was going to cover up the little incident at the hospital.

"Me likes to eat humans, they is tasting good, but Carlisle says I have to respect the laws of his house and his neighbors or I cannot live with him and I like him and the others so I won't drink human blood," Matthew was saying.

"How many humans have you killed?" I asked a bit harsh, wishing he would let me go.

"I am not knowing," Matthew said. "Matthew got hungry and found them to eats. They tasted really good."

"Thank god he didn't kill Charlie," I heard Seth mutter.

"Me like Charlie," Matthew said. "Normally Matthew doesn't go into cars with me...not since that one tried to do stuff to Matthew."

We all froze. We looked at Matthew and he looked uncomfortable, like he was remembering something he did not like. "Matthew, what do you mean a man in a car tried to do stuff to you?" I asked, fearing the answer.

"Matthew was walking along a road one nights in a big city. Matthew likes big cities, they be full of people to eat and colors from all the people. A man pulled up in his car and asked Matthew if he was lost and Matthew was lost looking for daddy and I told the man this. The man glowed with satisfaction, desire and sick need. Matthew didn't like him much, but he said he knew where daddy was and he would drive Matthew to him. Matthew went with him and they drive somewhere private and quiet, Matthew ask man where daddy is and man say nothing. Matthew saw how excited he was, it made Matthew uncomfortable, man was feeling things at Matthew, Matthew had seen before that men and women feel for one another. We stopped and flecks of red appear in his color and I knew man wanted to do bad things to Matthew. He turned to Matthew and told him he had to do things for man to find daddy, Matthew said no and man grabbed Matthew and try to touch him. Then I radiate fear and man got scared and tried to run from Matthew but Matthew found me and made sure he never touch anyone again."

The uncomfortable look on his face disappeared, replaced by a savage look of triumph, enjoying the memory of the kill. We all looked at one another; I made a mental note to inform Carlisle of this.

We continued to walk and Matthew continued to talk of all the places he had been to, all the people he had seen and ate, about how much fun he had with the Cullen's and Nessie. Or Ness-Ness as he liked to call her. I could tell Jake got a little jealous.

So could Matthew. "Don't be Jealous Jake-Jake, me and Ness-Ness are friends, like me and Leah and Seth-Seth are friends. We can be friends to, me not bite you, promise."

We made it to the treaty line and found some of the Cullen's waiting. "Car-Car! Es-Es! Ed-Ed, Jas-Jas!" Matthew screamed in delight. He ran to the Cullen's dragging me with him. He refused to let me go and I had to fight not to fall down.

Esme bent down to meet with him. "Matthew we were so worried about you," she said, her face filled with relief.

"I'm sorry Es-Es, me got thirsty and wanted to drink and I went to find an animal to eat. Me left scent marks on tree's so I would not be getting lost."

"We know, we followed you're trail," Carlisle said. He turned to Jake and smiled. "Thank you Jacob. I am sorry about this. I was going to call you tomorrow and tell you about Matthew."

"What were you doing phased in the first place Jake?" Seth asked. "It was our night."

"Carlisle called me and told me Matthew was heading for our territory. I instantly ran out and phased and told Sam of the situation. We found you're scent and I tried calling but you didn't respond," he said.

"We couldn't phase, I told you that?" I said annoyed.

"Why couldn't you phase?" Carlisle asked.

"Matthew did something, we could only feel calm and peaceful," I said.

"I saw them naked. Did you know girls don't have the thing between you're legs?" Matthew said looking amazed.

I flushed in embarrassment and I heard Jake and Seth gaff in laughter. I turned and glared at them and they shut up in an instant.

"He actually kept you from phasing?" Carlisle said amazed.

"Yes."

He looked at Matthew with the kind of interest a scientist looks at a new species of animal he finds. "I am sorry for the trouble, we will keep a better eye on him." he turned and face Matthew and his tone became more stern. "And we are going to have a talk young man about you running off without telling no one."

"Sorry Car-Car, me got thirsty and wanted to find an animal to eat. I didn't hurted Seth-Seth though, me knew you not like it if I hurted him."

"Well I am glad you or no one got hurt."

"Except my pride," I muttered.

"Now apologize to the Quileutes for trespassing on their land and bothering them," Carlisle said.

Matthew turned to us all. "Sorry for trespassing and bothering you and trying to eat you and seeing you naked." he looked at me, worry clear on his face. "You should see a doctor about not having a thingie between your legs. That could be bad."

Seth, Jake and Jared couldn't hold it in anymore. They let out boisterous laughs, coming from Jared it sounded like thunder. Sam was still not laughing, but even the Cullen's could not manage to smile a little bit at Matthew's ignorance.

"I am a girl, we do not have thingies between our legs," I said uncomfortable I had to tell a kid this.

"That's weird," he said.

"Okay Matthew lets go home," Esme said.

Matthew began to walk with Esme, dragging me with him. "Uh Matthew please let Leah go," Esme said with a small smile.

Matthew looked sad. "Can't she come with us?" he asked.

"No, she has things she has to do at her own home."

"But she is so sad. Let's take her home and make her happy," he said holding my hand tight.

"Matthew it is not polite to tell people what someone is feeling," Esme gently chided him.

"It is?"

"Yes, people prefer their feelings not be told to others."

Matthew looked pained. I could tell he didn't want to leave me. "Will you come visit me Leah?" he asked.

I didn't want to, I had spent enough time at the leech house to last me a life time. But the puppy dog look on his face was filled with begging and pleading, I had to say yes. "Yeah sure, whatever. Now let go my hand, I'm losing the feeling in it."

He had been holding onto my hand so tight it had gone numb. He let go and wrapped his arms around my legs and hugged me, thank god we healed quick or I would be covered in bruises tomorrow.

"I can't wait!"

"But you have to go to bed and be good."

"I will I promise Leah."

He let go and took Esme's hand. She smiled warmly and I smiled back. Esme had always been nothing but nice and caring to me even when I was being blatantly disrespectful to her. There was not a vindictive bone in that woman's body.

"I will make food for you tomorrow."

"Thank you."

"I will come too, to talk with you about Matthew," Jake said.

Sam took a step forward. "Sam wants to come too," Edward said.

"You are all welcome," Carlisle said.

We planned to come over at around noon. As they walked away Matthew kept on looking back and me and smiling and waving. I waved back to appease the little spaz and he smiled when I did.

Once they were out of eyes sight I turned to a grinning Seth and Jake. "What?"

"Someone has a fan," Seth said.

"Shut it!" I growled.

"Aw, come on Leah-Leah don't be like that," Jake said.

"Black I am this close to killing you and taking over the pack!" I warned.

"Man I can't believe that kid kept us from phasing," Seth said.

"Tell me about it, not even Jasper could do that," I said remembering how his power kept me so calm and peaceful. I have been practicing for months with yoga and meditation to try and get a little of what he just gave me and I have not even come close. But in a second he gave me enough peace and calm to bring a raging elephant to a stop.

"I wonder where he is from and where his dad is. I know I wouldn't want to lose my kid, especially if he could do that," Jake said.

Where was his father? Jake was right. With a power that strong why would a vampire just ditch him. Unless he was dead. I remembered on the way to meet with the Cullen's Matthew talked of how he had no memory except for an incomprehensible pain. A pain so powerful it filled his past and made him more than a little unhinged.

I looked to Sam and saw he was not happy. He was still looking in the direction the Cullens had gone, he looked tense. I know he was not happy a vampire...I mean half-vampire was out there who had the power to make us go from wolf to human. He glanced at me and I looked away.

Jake went home and me and Seth phased and finished our rounds. Seth was going to come with us. Not that he needed an excuse, of all the wolves Jake and Seth spent the most time at the Cullen's. Jake for Nessie and Seth because he liked to hang out with the vampires.

He liked to play video games with Emmett and listen to Jasper talk about his days as a bad ass vampire and military general in the civil war. Edward had been teaching him to play the piano. I wished he would hang out with anyone but the Cullen's. He didn't have many friends at school anymore. After he phased he had to ditch all of them.

He had better control now but still having human friends is hard. How do you talk about music and girls and school work when you know you are different? When you live in a world of myth and legend. He hangs out with Collin and Brady from time to time and has been helping Sam with the new wolves. But when he is not doing school work or patrolling he spends most of his time at the Cullen's.

I guess I can understand why he did it. The new wolves were too young for him to hang out with and Collin and Brady only had so much time what with their own duties to Sam's pack. The Cullen's were the only other people he could be himself with and not hide his true nature.

The thought of me having human friends seemed impossible. I still have an attitude problem and it just seemed odd to be around people who were below you in the food chain.

After we finished we headed home. I went straight to bed, tired from the night's events, my legs still a little sore form Matthew's grip. He had clung to me so hard, afraid to let me go.

I was more than a little disturbed by Matthew, how he could so easily control my emotions like flipping a light switch, how he could read me so easily and see all the pain I held deep within me. Then there was the wild feral side I saw float in his eyes that let me know that he was more wild and dangerous than Nessie was.

I hope the Cullen's know what they have gotten themselves into, I have a feeling Matthew is going to be a handful.

 

**Fusedtwilight: If only Leah knew how he was going to affect her life. Please review.**


	3. Chapter 3

Focused Madness

Chapter 3

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki**

 

 

Alarm: Sudden sharp apprehension and fear resulting from the perception of danger. A warning notice

Example: Bella becomes alarmed when she see's the others begin to act strange.

Bella P.O.V

It has been twelve days since we found Matthew. Things have gotten very odd around the house.

It all started the next day after Matthew had his run in with the wolves. He and Nessie were in the living room watching T.V. Matthew was amazed by it, he could not believe so many people could live in a single box; I had tried to explain they were not in the box but he got confused so I dropped it.

Jake, Seth, Leah, Sam and Jared showed up at around noon. Esme had cooked them some steak and potatoes. Matthew was excited to see Leah again. He hugged her legs tightly and I swear I could hear the sound of her bones cracking under the strain. After she got her food on a plate and a cup of Pepsi to drink she and Seth followed Matthew into the living room to watch T.V. with us.

Carlisle, Jasper and Edward staid downstairs to talk with the other wolves while the rest of us watched T.V. I noticed Matthew sat with Leah happy as could be. Leah didn't seem too thrilled to be in a room full of vampires. Or maybe she was uneasy about how pleased Matthew was sitting next to her.

Alice had bought him some clothes. He looked so adorable in his little pants and light blue shirt, with his hair neatly cut. Only his body movements and wild eyes betrayed his true nature. He reminded me of the Amazon coven who were the wildest vampires I have ever met, the way they moved, quick, graceful, cat like.

I could hear what they were talking about downstairs. Sam was worried that Matthew might lose control and snap. Jake had some of the same worries, we all did. Matthew was a wild card, not just because he was vampire like but it was how unpredictable he was. He could be happy and delightful in a moment than he could be wild and crazy the next.

He didn't act very human; his movement were very animal like. Just as the Amazon coven had been. I wondered how long he had been alone, how long he had hunted and fallen deeper and deeper into his vampire nature. I wondered if he had left any evidence of his kills, he wasn't exactly the neat and tidy type.

Sam was also worried that if any of the wolves had to fight Matthew all he would have to do was make them phase back and they would be sitting ducks. Carlisle informed them my power protected me from Matthew's power. We were sure he was an empath like Jasper. Carlisle figure since Jasper controls the chemicals in a person's mind it allows him to manipulate my emotions like the others.

He figured Matthew does is direct to the mind so I was immune. Sam had already informed the elders about Matthew and they were worried as well.

So after an hour of assurances we would do our best to train him and help him control his urges better the wolves left. Matthew was sad to see Leah go but she promised to come back and see him. She has not shown up since. Matthew doesn't seem to really mind, Edward said Matthew doesn't view the world like us; his view on time is a little broader than ours.

During the last twelve days things seemed to settle. We had adapted Matthew into our lives. Carlisle had arranged for Matthew to be put in his custody making him Matthew's legal guardian. On the third day a worker from the social office came to make sure our living conditions were right for Matthew.

It had been very tense. We had made sure Matthew was well fed and told him what to say and not to say. The lady had been an older heavier set woman who had a smile for everyone. She asked Carlisle a few questions about his credentials and how Matthew had been.

Then she had talked to Matthew and I could tell she was uneasy around him. He kept on looking at her like she was something to eat. Which to him she was. Jasper had used some of his power to make her more trusting and she gave us the all go.

On the fourth day of his stay with us the oddness began. I had noticed it in small doses at first, but as time went on the others became more...intense. I don't mean that in a bad way...exactly.

It began with Rose, who had always been vain and tenacious (or pig headed as Edward liked to say) but she had been spending more and more time looking in the mirror and trying on new dresses and finding these little microscopic deformities on her face that only she could see that she claimed made her look ugly. She began to spend more and more time on her looks, spending less and less time with Emmett and the family and more and more on herself.

Carlisle spent more and more time at the hospital. One day there had been a horrible accident and he had been unable to save a woman or her child. He came home crying, praying to God to forgive him. Now Carlisle is a good man, but he had been a doctor for centuries. He knew well that some you save, some you can't. There had been times when he lost a patient but he mourned them quietly and prayed for their souls. But now here he was crying like a baby and feeling such guilt for two lost lives. It was also to our shock that on the sixth day of Matthew's stay here he donated almost half our money to charity.

It was nothing new; we made private donations to all sorts of charity all over the world. But Carlisle had about thirty five billion dollars. All of it separated in different banks under different names all over the country so as to not arouse suspicion. Now half of it was gone. "Greed is a sin," he said. "Why should we horde so much money when the country is in a recession and people are suffering all over the world?"

I wondered if vampires can go through a midlife crisis.

Esme had become more mother like and loving than ever. Whenever we went out she always made sure we had our cell phones on us. She would call us up and ask us if we were okay which was ridiculous seeing how no animal except the wolves could hurt us. She also made sure we carried baby wipes with us when we went to hunt to wipe the blood from our mouths.

She also fussed over our looks more, making sure our shirts were tucked in, fixing our hair when she felt it was getting to unruly. She gave us extra hugs and extra kisses and told us she loved us all three times more than what she did. She had been looking at the family photos more, reminiscing over the old days. She had also been watching a lot of lifetime. She cried a lot when she watched that station.

Next was Emmett. Emmett had always been competitive. Whether it was racing, playing video games or anything else. He always did his best to win. It had been to a minor childish degree like when I beat him when we first wrestled. Now it seemed like his competitiveness had reached new heights.

He would challenge any one to anything, racing, wrestling, video games. When he won he would rub it in our faces, but when he lost, he lost it, literally. He would get so mad he lost at something he would get physically violent. He never hit us but he would demolish the area around him. Plus there was his sex issues. I always knew Emmett was a horn dog before he became a vampire, dying didn't curb that at all. Now it seemed like it had reached new heights. He was constantly hitting on me, Rose and Alice and dressing like he was trying to impress. I mean who wears leather and vinyl in the middle of the day at home?

Normally Rose would deal with that but sense she was too busy worrying about her looks now Emmett had to deal with it himself. And these walls are paper thin if you know what I mean.

Not to mention he was obsessed with defeating me. It has been nine months since I became a vampire and my strength had began to wane to the point where me and Emmett were now on equal footing and he was doing his damnedest to beat me. He was really trying to fight me too, there was nothing playful about it, if he had to rip off a limb to do it he would try.

On the ninth day he came so close to actually tearing off my arm Edward had to stop the fight and came dangerously close to having his own ruffle with Emmett. Speaking of Edward his power has been acting odd. It had become a lot harder for him to block others thoughts, his range had increased and he was beginning to seed deeper into minds and was finding it possible to literally read minds instead of hearing thoughts. Not to mention he had always been very watchful, paying maybe a little too much attention to every little detail in what he sees.

Jasper...was a very disturbing case. His empathy power had grown stronger. He could sense our emotions so well he has now developed a horrible case of distinctive identity disorder. Let me explain. He could feel our emotions so well it was like they were his own emotions. One day I was walking by his and Alice's room when I saw him at Alice's desk, looking at himself in the mirror and applying eye shadow and putting lip gloss on. "Hi Bella, don't I look hot?" he asked when he saw me looking.

I quickly made my exit.

Then he would be watching T.V with Esme and acting motherly to all of us, than he was super compassionate and crying over the suffering of all the people of the world, than he was fighting with Emmett over who was the best vampire, than he was paying too much attention to details like Edward does now that his power is acting up. It was like he was channeling all our emotions.

Poor Alice was suffering as well; her power had been growing stronger. She was having visions from further into the future. Usually the visions go up to a few months to a year, but now she was getting visions from more than a year from now. They were becoming more real, not only did she hear and see a vision, she could smell and taste and feel as if she was there.

It was giving her a serious migraine as well, what is more amazing is La Push is slowly becoming visible to her, she has had little glimpses of the wolves in her vision, even Nessie was included in her visions. Her visions have become so intense she has isolated herself trying to meditate to control her visions. Edward and Alice tried to stay away from each other since their powers cross with one another.

I have tried to help her as has Jasper, but the visions are to much for her to handle, her mind has slowly begun to shut down. We don't know what is causing it but I have a pretty good idea.

Even my sweet Renesme as been affected. Before she had a child's curiosity. She was also an energetic little thing; she got that from my mother Rene. But in the last few weeks she has become a little monster. She was like one of those annoying little kids you see on the T.V always asking are we there yet or running around screaming. Her power like everyone's has increased. She can now show her memories without touching someone as long as they are a few feet from her.

On the eleventh day Jake visited and he noticed things were wrong. "Bella what is going on? This place has gone crazy," he said.

"I don't know Jake but I have to do something. This is starting to affect our personal lives as well. Carlisle had to come home because he kept on crying at work about a patient who died of cancer. Carlisle was going to change him but he died before Carlisle could and he felt so guilty."

"Should I take Nessie out of here? Things seem to be getting out of hand," he said.

"Yes, I think she should spend the night. Something needs to be done and things are to chaotic right now."

As ashamed as I was of it I was relieved he was taking Nessie away. It was like someone pumped her full of redbull. Nessie left with Jake to spend the night in La Push and it couldn't have happened at a better time. Because on the twelfth day things exploded.

First I called a family meeting. I expanded my shield around Edward so he could not hear Alice's thoughts and become catatonic like her. When I did his power seemed to go back to normal.

Alice and Jasper sat together. Jasper's face kept on changing. One minute annoyed and angry, than happy and loving, than blank and empty like Alice's.

Emmett and Rose looked like they stepped out of an issue of hustler. Emmett in his sunglasses and leather and vinyl with his bling-bling. Rose with her short cut jean skirt and red short cut spaghetti strap shirt with no bra that would have woken a man up if he was in a coma.

Esme and Carlisle sat together. Carlisle was still sad, still mourning and Esme was supporting him. Matthew sat next to her looking confused at everyone in the room. Like he was seeing something he did not understand.

"Okay everyone now I know why you are wondering why we are here," I said.

"Yes, I have better things to do you know. I have to do something about these crow's feet, Rose said pointing to the crow's feet that did not exist on her face.

"Don't worry sister, you are beautiful, almost as much as me," Jasper said crossing his legs like Rose and looking smug.

"Almost?" Rose whispered horror struck.

"Any way I think I know what the problem is-"

"I am sorry to interrupt Bella," Esme said standing up, "but I have a big announcement. I have decided to adopt a baby."

A stunned silence followed. Than everyone responded in a second.

"Oh honey that is wonderful truly god made you as his angel of mercy!" Carlisle cried.

"Great more competition," Emmett scowled.

"Oh I want to help decorate the baby room!" Jasper said bouncing up and down in delight.

"No we cannot do this!" Rose screamed.

"Rosalie Hale why not?" Esme said clearly upset.

"Esme were vampires! You cannot bring a child into our life, you are risking the family as well."

"Rosalie I am disappointed in you," Esme said. "How can you not want to help a poor soul who has lost so much, besides you always wanted a child."

"Yes as a human, but if we get a baby it will figure out pretty quick something is off about us when it gets older and we stay young!"

"Oh we can work around that, just think of the good we could do. In fact let's adopt an entire orphanage," Carlisle said.

Things degenerated quickly. Alice was quiet the entire time, unblinking, unmoving. Jasper was constantly agreeing or disagreeing with everyone depending on his mood. Rose and Emmett were against the baby, Esme and Carlisle for it. Edward was quiet, he was trying to shut out all the thoughts of everyone and his teeth were gritted. I could hear them grinding against one another.

Matthew was looking sad, confused at all the fighting, I could tell it was upsetting him a lot.

"All right that is it!" I screamed. The stress of the past twelve days made snap. Acting quick, I expanded my shield to encompass everyone in the family except for Matthew. It was like a switch had been flipped. Everyone blinked, than the air was filled with calm and peace.

I looked at Jasper who had a look of pure joy on his face. "Oh thank god! I can feel again!"

"Sweet lord look at me, I am not beautiful I am a slut! Look at me! I can't believe I actually thought I was anything but beautiful!" Rose said.

"Look at me, I look ridiculous!" Emmett said tearing off bling and taking off his shades. "I got to go on myspace and quick!"

"When did you get a myspace?" I asked.

"Well I got thinking there are lots of people who would love to see me near...or completely naked so I made an account."

Rose bristled. "You put naked photos of yourself online for people to gawk at!"

"Well on the plus side I have over twenty thousand friends and I have gotten offers from Kelvin Cline to do some photo shoots," he said sheepishly.

"I can not believe I donated over sixteen billion dollars to Alec's lemonade," Carlisle said.

"I can not believe I came this close to adopting a baby," Esme said.

"I can't believe the things I saw," Alice said, "You will not believe the things I saw. It was horrible, my mind was over loaded with the future, and I felt like I was drowning. I couldn't focus."

Jasper hugged Alice to calm her down.

"But what caused it?" Esme asked.

"Oh come on, we all know what or should I say who caused it," Rose said.

We all turned to look at Matthew. "Is everyone better now? You were all acting weird," Matthew said.

"Matthew, have you been doing anything you shouldn't have?" Carlisle asked sternly.

"No Car-Car, Matthew is being good, just like you are asking," Matthew said.

"He is telling the truth, I was in his head these last twelve days, he sensed our emotions growing but he did not purposely cause it."

"But what about our powers?" Jasper asked, "I cannot make someone's powers stronger and he is empathic like me."

"Obviously there is more to Matthew than we thought," Carlisle said.

"Is Matthew in trouble?" Matthew asked.

"No sweetie," Esme said kissing him on the head.

"Okay before we do anything let me test something," I said.

I noticed that Esme had leaned out of my shield to kiss Matthew and she didn't seem to go back to the way she was before I put up the shield. With Matthew outside my shield I could sense his power, it was beating down on my shield like the rays from the sun. I slowly lowered my shield, keeping an eye on the others, making sure they didn't revert to their old selves. Nothing happened so I brought the shield back to me.

Nothing happened, everyone remained the same. "Okay, so I guess it takes the affects of...whatever Matthew's power does to you guys- a few hours to take effect," I said.

"Well I will call Eleazar and have him come down from Alaska, I think we can agree he can help us figure out more about Matthew's power," Carlisle said.

"I have a power?" Matthew asked.

"Yes, the colors dear," Esme said.

"Oh cool, I was thinking I was just a freak," Matthew said with a smile.

"I will contact Eleazar immediately, Bella could you keep an eye on Matthew; make sure his power is kept in check."

"Sure thing."

Edward kissed my cheek. "Well done love."

"Esme I hope you didn't sign any papers or anything for that baby," Carlisle said.

"No, it was a decision I just made, I was going to make the calls later," Esme said looking sheepish.

"Good. Oh and Rose, Emmett, please put on some decent cloths and Jasper...you have lip gloss on your lips."

Jasper quickly rubbed it off.

* * *

 

Fascination: The state of being fascinated: The state of feeling intense interest in something

Example: Eleazar is fascinated by Matthew when he meets him.

Carlisle P.O.V

I contacted Eleazar and him and the other Denali coven members showed up the next day.

We all greeted them at the door. Nessie was back to normal, she was no longer full of energy. Bella had kept watch over Matthew, making sure his power was kept in check.

She was upstairs with him now getting him ready to meet with the Denali coven. I wanted to go over about the boy with him before he met him.

Garrett was with them. I was pleased to see his eyes were yellow like ours now. "It was really tough but Kate managed to keep me in line," Garrett said smiling at his mate.

"Any time he even thought of going back to human blood I gave him a nice zap to the ass," Kate said with a smile.

"He has really been wondering all alone by himself?" Carmen asked sounding concerned about Matthew, she was maternal like Esme. The thought of a child alone in the world tore at her heart.

"Well let's meet this young man," Eleazar said clapping his hands together.

I, Esme, Eleazar, Carmen and Nessie went upstairs leaving the others alone to talk and catch up.

I opened the door to my study. Nessie ran over to her parents who were entertaining Matthew. "Matthew these are the Denali coven members Carmen and...Eleazar?"

Eleazar was frozen in the doorway, staring at Matthew with a look of amazement and shock. "Eleazar what is the matter?" I asked.

"I can't believe it," he said. He strolled forward and knelled in front of Matthew. He gently touched his face and studied him closely. Amazing! Simply amazing! So much potential, such complexity." He looked at Matthew like an artist looking over the work of a well known artist.

"What are you?" he asked Matthew.

"Me is being Matthew, a hybrid like Ness-Ness."

"Oh he calls her Ness-Ness? That is so precious," Carmen said gently pulling her husband off of Matthew. "Don't be rude dear," she lightly chastised.

"He calls everyone names like that," Edward said, "he calls me Ed-Ed, Bella is Bell-Bell and so on with the others."

"Except Leah," Matthew said sadly. "Where is Leah, I miss Leah."

Leah had not been to visit like she promised. I was considering asking Jake if he could request she come visit. It might do Matthew some good, seeing how he took a liking to her.

"Oh don't worry sweetie, I am sure she misses you as much as you miss her," Carmen said giving him a hug.

* * *

 

Acceptance: The act of accepting, to be accepted. To accept a situation without any reaction.

Example: Leah accepts a request.

Leah P.O.V

I had not been over to see Matthew. Like I said before I had been to the Cullen's once and once is enough.

My day was continuing as it usually did. Wake up, take shower, eat, and go out for a quick run. (as a human) come back, do some yoga, help mom do some chores. Go for a little stroll through the woods avoid Sam, especially avoid Sam, come home help mom cook dinner, do some more yoga, patrol, come home, go to bed.

Today I was doing something different. Today I was trying to find a job. I had done some odd jobs around La Push. Baby sitting, cleaning the house and yards of some of the older folks. Stuff like that. But I was tired of the low pay; I needed a job a real job. Sadly such things were hard to find now days.

Money wasn't a problem. When dad died he left us with enough money to send both me and Seth to college and have enough money for herself. God bless dad, he was a hard worker, and he had worked in the lumber mill the majority of his life, good money and lots of benefits.

But I wanted to separate my human life from my werewolf life. So I had to get a normal human job. But what? I could be a secretary. I was good at doing paper work and filing stuff. Or I could get a job as a nurse or work in the cafeteria there. It may not be as exciting as being a nurse or doctor but even working in the dietary area you get benefits.

I was so engrossed I forgot not to answer the door. I left that to mom or Seth. But I was so annoyed when someone showed up and interrupted my job hunting that I got up and answered the door.

It was Sam. "Hey Leah," he said.

"Hey," I said. I did my best to sound not surprised or upset. Which I was both.

"Can I come in?"

No you can take you're sorry ass out of my house.

"Sure." I opened the door and let him in. As he passed I rolled my eyes. I was not in the mood to deal with Sam. I had more important shit to deal with, like moving on with my life.

He walked into the kitchen and sat down. He glanced at the paper. "You're looking for a job?"

"Yeah, need something to do besides yoga and patrolling. Now that Victoria is dead and the Volturi are gone I can start putting my life together."

"Good, I am glad for you Leah," he smiled.

I said nothing, just leaned against the door frame. We said nothing, the air was tense and uncomfortable. "So how are things in Jacob's pack?" he asked.

"Okay. How's the kids doing?"

"Okay. We have made some progress helping them not phase. Still can't believe so many wolves exist now. Our generation has had a lot of firsts."

"Yeah first wolf-pups and first she-wolf. Hell of a record breaker for our little rez," I said.

"Do you like being a beta?" he asked.

"It's okay. Not much to do now that things are all quiet on the western front. It's nice to have some authority over the others though, I tell them to jump they ask how high."

He grinned. "I always knew you would be a good leader Lee."

"Bullshit. I was too busy pinning over you and mourning my father and feeling sorry for me, to be a second. Leaving your pack and following Seth was the best decision I made in a long time."

The smile left his face. "I am sorry you were miserable Leah. But I am glad you are happy."

"But you wish I was still part of the pack," I said.

"No," he said a little too quickly.

"Please. I seem too recall you sending Jared to as he said _'Get on my hands and knees and beg',"_ I said quoting Jared. "You even told him to use my nickname you insensitive prick." I didn't raise my voice. I was just stating a fact. I didn't mean to make this confrontational but Sam always seemed to draw out my bad side-well as of late.

"Leah, I wanted you away from Jacob, from the Cullen's. I didn't want you to get hurt."

"Funny you never mean for me to get hurt yet you still manage to do it."

He continued like I said nothing. "We knew nothing about Nessie. How did we know she wasn't going to be a wild, raging monster? How did we know she wouldn't be worse than a newborn? I felt there was a risk to the tribe and our families and I decided to act."

"Please, you always wanted to kill the Cullen's. You blamed them for us, you blamed them for Emily, you blamed them for all the misery we all felt."

"I let them turn Bella, I joined with them to kill the newborns," he said defensively.

"You let them turn Bella because you knew she loved Edward not Jake and you hoped once she was out of the picture Jake would snap out of his little emo phase. You joined with them because Bella was human and we protect humans but the newborns were a threat to us as well and you knew we were to outnumbered to fight twenty newborns if they attacked the tribe."

He smiled but it was hallow. "You know me so well Leah, you didn't even have to read my mind. Yes I just joined them to kill the newborns, yes I let them turn Bella because I knew she wanted it and I hoped once she was gone Jake would come to his senses."

I sighed. I had been avoiding this talk for months but here we were talking about it. About me leaving his pack, about me leaving him, about the imprinting, about our feelings for one another.

"I was so mad and angry when you left, I felt so betrayed."

"Not so fun when you are on the receiving end huh?" I asked.

He glared at me. "I was angry because you were defending the vampires Leah. The same leeches who caused me to phase and imprint on Emily. The same blood suckers who caused our suffering in the first place. You left me to protect them to spite me!"

"Don't you dare make this all about me Sam," I growled. "I left because my baby brother decided he had the balls to get out from under your thumb and join Jake to do the right thing. My only regret is I let the little shit leave first. I didn't leave because of you, I left for him. It wasn't until after I left I considered the thought of not being in your head and hearing you're lovey, dovey thoughts about Emily all the fucking time. I was more concerned about my brother and what he was getting himself into and protecting his ass so he didn't wind up hurt or dead."

"And now you got what you wanted, are you happy Leah?" he asked.

"No, happy is I still have someone to love me, happy is my dad still alive and my mom not going out with another man, happy is being able to still have children, happy is not being a fucking werewolf and being a normal girl and going to college. See that's another thing I enjoy about being in Jake's pack, more freedom. He wants me to go to college, he wants me to get a job, and he wants me to have a normal life that doesn't involve hunting monsters."

"You know why I did not allow us to tell friends or family or allow anyone to go to college. We have a duty to the tribe and the pack and it is too much risk," he said.

"Yeah well guess what, I am going to college, as soon as I work out my wolf issues I will go and I will be sure to send you a shit load of cards that say 'glad you are not here.'"

The rage threatened to come out, to transmute from emotional energy to fur and claws. But I took deep breaths and focused. I am proud to say I did not even shake.

"You really have been practicing?"

"Don't sound so amazed, you think I want to stay angry all the time and burst into fur and claws all the time?"

He looked at the paper. Looking at the possible jobs I circled and the ones I axed out. "I am happy you are moving on Leah. You deserve happiness."

"Thank you, now why are you here?" I asked.

"Emily wanted me to ask you if you are still in the wedding," he asked.

I practiced self-control. I had hoped she had been kidding at first, that she was just trying to be nice to me in a weird way. I also hoped that after the last nine month's she had reconsidered. Guess not.

I was about to tell him to fuck off when the phone rang. Seeing an opportunity I grabbed the phone. "Hello?" I answered.

"Leah, its Jake."

"What's up?"

"The Denali coven is visiting the Cullen's. Apparently little Matthew is stronger than what we or they thought."

He described what had been happening to the Cullen's these last twelve days. I wanted to tell him to shut up and that Sam was there. Something told me this was not stuff Sam should be hearing. A.) It was my pack's business none of his. B.) Sam did not like Matthew one bit and judging from his past with vampire hybrid children I did not like the fact he was hearing how the Cullen's were having difficulty with the kid.

"So they are trying to figure out what makes his power tick?"

"Yes, Eleazar is having a field day with this kid. Judging from his reaction the kid is strong. He is examining him right now."

"So what do you want me to do?"

"Well Matthew is asking for you. He is wondering why you haven't been visiting him."

I sighed. "Let me guess, you want me to come over and hold his hand?"

"If it isn't too much. He is really nervous and he misses you."

"Why me? He only met me once."

"I don't know, he is a kid, he is a hybrid and he obviously is not in his right mind. Please Leah."

"Sure I will be right down." Better than standing here and having the talk with Sam.

"Okay, I will see you soon."

He hanged up.

I put the phone back on the wall and turned to Sam. I know he heard everything. These super werewolf senses could be really useful for eavesdropping. I know a few old ladies in town who would kill for such a power, the easier to listen in on conversations and gossip.

"I'm heading over to the Cullen's, Jake needs me."

"You mean Matthew needs you," he said with a raised eyebrow.

"What he needs is a padded cell and some Thorazine."

"Then why go over?"

"Because the kid may be crazy but he is still a kid. And because Jake asked me to, that's another thing I like about him, he asks me to do stuff, and he doesn't have to order me."

I was being a bitch and purposely baiting Sam. He took the bait. Swift anger filled his eyes. "Well maybe if you hadn't been so difficult I wouldn't have needed to order you around Leah."

I grabbed a notepad and pencil and wrote mom and Seth a note. They were still at the grocery store. Thank god dad left us enough money where we could still live comfortably and maintain our diet. Otherwise we would have starved long ago.

"I'm leaving now. Do me a favor and lock the door on your way out." I turned and went to walk outside but Sam stopped me.

"Leah wait." I heard the sound of the legs on the chair squeal against the floor. "The wedding, are you in or out?"

I stopped. I should say no. I owe nothing to either of them. I loved them both, they were two of the five most important people to me and they hurt me bad. For all my life my heart would have a scar from what they did. Sure they didn't mean to do it, sure it was all imprinting and destiny and all that bullshit Sam likes to go on about.

But I loved him. I loved him with all my heart and soul. I would have died for this man, I would have spent the rest of my life holding him, loving him, kissing him, loving him. I would have given him and home and a family. We would have had the perfect life.

It was not that he left me, it was how he left me, and it was the way how he treated me when I was in his back. One minute giving me special treatment than acting like I was another wolf. Like when he made me cut my hair. I miss my long hair. It brought back a lot of memories of me and Sam. But he made me cut it, even knowing how much it hurt to do it. It was knowing that even though a large part of him loved Emily more than me, a small part of him missed me and wanted me to love him.

So what do I owe them? Nothing. Fuck them both. Why should I have to watch as Emily gets what should have been mine? Why should I have the memory of the event that should have mine, the role that should have been mine.

I sighed. What I said about Sam still loving me was true but it was also true that I loved him as well. I gave him my heart and hearts are precious things, once you give it to someone they own you. No matter what.

I loved them both, I missed them both. I wanted to move on with my life and in order to do that I had to let go. There was no hope. Sam would never be mine, the dreams I had would never come true. If I was to move on I had to let go, which was the hardest thing, especially when you were letting go of the one you gave you're heart to.

"I'm in," was all I said. I quickly walked out the door and ran for the woods. I quickly strapped my clothes to my leg and phased. I ran for the Cullen's, glad to get far away from Sam. If only I could just run away, far, far away and not have to deal with this shit.

Be careful what you ask for, you might just get it.

 

**Fusedtwilight: So what had Eleazar so excited? What is it about Matthew that makes him so strong and what exactly is his power? Find out next chapter. Please review.**


	4. Chapter 4

Focused Madness

Chapter 4

 

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing, thanks to everyone who commented.**

 

Matthew P.O.V

The Alaskan people came to fix me.

Matthew is really sad he cause Cullens such trouble. Matthew learned the colors are something special he can do. Matthew sad this special power hurt Cullens. Matthew had no idea it make them act weird. He wonder why they change so suddenly, I was not knowing it because of me.

El-El was really excited and amazed when he meets me. His colors light up bright with excitement which is color of pale lavender. Car-Car is much like Esme, me like her.

I not meet others yet but Bell-Bell and Ed-Ed tell much about them. Garrett is much like Em-Em. Only slimmer and with long yellow hair he keep in ponytail. Kate is his mate and she is blonde and pretty. She have sister called Tanya who is what they call strawberry blond because it mixture of red and yellow. I wonder if they have apple blondes and grape blondes too?

They like Cullen's eat animal blood so they eyes be yellow. My eyes now yellow, they stay brown. Ness-Ness says we hybrids stay same color. I disappointed. Yellow eyes pretty.

We all quiet now. Eleazar is sitting across from me, just staring. He say he needs to focus on me to work on exactly how strong my gift is. Ness-Ness, Ed-Ed, Bell-Bell, Car-Car, Es-Es stayed to watch. Everyone back down stairs talking.

I wish Leah here. I miss her, me thinks it be to long since seeing her. Me nots sure, not good at time. She really sad. I want to make her happy. Matthew knows what it is like to be sad. Before he is finding Cullens he be really sad and alone and no one to talk to or tell him who he is or where he come from.

Me remember Car-Car say mommy in better place waiting to meet me. But I have to be good or me never see her again. So me try and be good, make mommy proud when she meet Matthew.

Matthew be good buy making Leah happy. Why she so sad and angry? She to pretty to be mad and sad. There is also much want and need in her. I am drawn to that need. I know that need all too well. The need for family, the need to belong.

Eleazar speak now. Me listen.

* * *

 

Carlisle P.O.V

Eleazar had not moved or blinked for fifteen moments. His full concentration was on Matthew, the more concentration he gave the easier it would be for him to identify a gift. So we all stayed as quiet as possible so to give him the concentration he needed for his task.

He was carefully studying Matthew, I have never seen him stare at someone so intently. I can only wonder what he is seeing. Eleazar had seeing dozens of abilities over his long life time. I can't begin to understand what it is about Matthew that would set him off.

When he spoke I let out a sigh of relief. I had been anticipating his verdict so much I forgot to inhale.

"Carlisle I swear you have the best luck at finding people with special abilities." he leaned back in his chair, still looking at Matthew.

"What do you see?" I asked.

"I think we should take this downstairs, the whole family should hear this, plus it is so complicated to explain I don't want to repeat myself."

"That is fine, Leah is almost here," Edward said.

"Leah!" Matthew shouted.

He shot up from his seat and ran downstairs. I looked at Edward, he would know what Eleazar saw. T _ell me, is he strong enough to make Aro want him?_

Edward looked at me and I knew just from a single look that Matthew was definitely someone Aro would want.

* * *

 

Complex: A whole made up of complicated or interrelated parts.

Example: Elezar explains the unique and complex nature of Matthew's power.

Leah P.O.V

I had barely knocked on the door when it flung open and something small and hard as a rock tackled me to the ground.

"Leah!" Matthew squealed in delight.

I let out a loud oomph as I hit the ground; the wind was knocked out of me. Matthew was hugging me painfully tight. I was surprised to see how happy he was to see me. Must have made one hell of an impression.

"Matthew is so happy to see you Leah! Matthew is missing you very much."

"Hi Matthew, do you think you can let me up now?" I asked.

"Okays."

He got up off me and I got up, clutching my sides. I don't think he broke a rib but my sides still hurt like hell. I bruise in the shape of his face was already appearing on my stomach but it would be healed in a few moments.

Matthew was jumping up and down excitedly. "Leah, Leah there's this coven of animal drinking vampires here called the Denali coven and this one guy Eleazar is here and he is really excited about my power isn't that great!"

Yeah, as long as you can't make us spontaneously combust or something.

"That makes me extra special like Ness-Ness because we both being hybrids and we both having powers." he stood proudly, pleased he was extra special. I didn't need to know he was a hybrid and had a power to know he was special, all you had to do was listen to him talk and _special_ was the first thing that came to mind.

"What's wrong Leah, you upset? Why you upset?" Matthew asked.

Damn I forgot his power. "It's nothing Matthew," I said.

"Okay's Matthew wants to introduce you to Denali coven now."

He took my hand and dragged inside. We ran all the way to the living room where the smell of vampire hit me. All the Cullen's and the Denali coven were in here. I recognized the Denali group right away. I saw that one nomad Garrett from before; I guess he was serious about joining them. I had thought he was just doing to get his freak on with the blonde Kate, guess he really had a thing for her.

I saw Jake next to Nessie. He smiled and I returned it in favor. Matthew was introducing me to the Denali coven. "That be El-El and his wife Car-Car. I not knowing which others be which but me thinking she be Tanya." he pointed at Tanya, "Kate," he pointed at Kate, "and Garrett," he pointed at Garrett.

"Very well done Matthew, such a smart boy," Carmen said.

Matthew beamed at her.

"Leah dear what happened to your chest, are you okay?" Esme asked.

The bruise was dark enough it could be seen through the wife beater I wore. "Matthew was a little over eager when he met me at the door."

Matthew looked sad. "Me sorry Leah, Matthew not wanting to hurt you, Matthew just happy to see you, it been long time," Matthew said.

"It's okay, you just have to be gentle with me, I am a girl and I am more fragile than you or the Cullens in this form," I said.

"Okay Leah, Matthew be gentle with you."

I took a seat next to Jake. There was no more room on the couch and I figured Matthew would sit next to Esme or Carmen who had saved him a spot, but to my surprise as soon as I sat down he jumped up on my lap and made himself comfortable. I saw Jake's eyes get wide as did everyone's.

I did not mind it. He was pretty light and he did smell nice. A thing I noticed about Nessie and now Matthew was although they did smell like vampire it did not have that nose burning smell the vamps did. They smelled better than humans but it was not like bleach mixed with sugar like the others. I wish vampires smelled more like this, it would make being around them more bearable and I liked this smell. It was the kind of smell you wanted on your bed sheets when you fell asleep. It was calming and soothing.

The Spanish leech began speaking. It was the one called Eleazar, the one who could tell what freaky powers a vampire had. He looked like he was about to explain a complex math equation to a bunch of morons so I made sure I paid attention.

"Okay, I have carefully studied Matthew. What I have found is amazing, I have never seen such a complex or potential gift before. As you know we have classifications for gifts but do to the unique nature of every gift it is hard to classify them. Like Bella and Renata being shields or Alice and Edward being psychics because their abilities allow them to gain information."

He took a moment to let his words seek in. I wondered if he ever was a teacher. He had that air of someone who was used to people listening to what he said, every word was carefully said so we could follow.

"Now you might say he is an empath like Jasper, Marcus and Chelsea. Jasper can sense and manipulate emotions, Marcus can see emotional bonds, Chelsea can manipulate said bonds, making people feel loyalty or disloyalty. Now due to his ability to see emotions in the form of a colorful aura and from what I have heard manipulate them like Jasper you would think he is empathic too. Well you are right and wrong. Matthew's power is like a mixture of Jasper's, Marcus's and Chelsea's. But even if you combine those powers you only begin to scratch the surface of what he can do."

"So what is he exactly? What is his power?" I asked.

Eleazar thought for a moment, thinking carefully of what to say next. "Forgive me, every time I think I know what to call it a new part of his power comes to light that makes me consider something else to call it. Although his powers are empathic in nature he is way beyond Jasper's range. He is the ultimate empath he can sense and manipulate emotions Jasper cannot. But from what I have gleamed from him and what I understand you would call his power...a psychic-lens."

"A psychic lens? What does that mean?" Jasper asked confused.

"Well his power is like a lens for emotional and mental energy. It allows him to see and manipulate emotions but it goes deeper than that affecting our very personalities as well. That is why you were all acting so strange, his power was slowly focusing you're strongest personalities. It is like what the venom does, taking our best traits and making them stronger. Carlisle you are compassionate so his power increased it, Emmett is competitive and so on and so forth."

"But what about me," Jasper said, "Us. Alice was catatonic from the visions she got, it was like our powers had reached a whole new level. I felt everyone's emotions so finely it was like they were my emotions as well, Edward could hear thoughts from farther away and was starting to be able to read minds."

"That is because our powers are parts of us Jasper. You're empathy was a result of you being charismatic, Edward's telepathy is a result of him being able to read body language, Alice had her gift when she was still human, but it got stronger when she turned. As a psychic-lens he can channel and manipulate mental energy. I believe since he does not have...the proper control we all have."

Meaning since he is crazy as a bat.

"He was not aware of what he was doing, his power was working through his subconscious and slowly intensifying you're personalities and powers. But he needs mental energy to work with and since Bella's mind is protected she was not affected and when she brought up her shield it cut you off from his power."

"Can he control it?" Carlisle asked.

"Yes, he just needs some proper training, I would like to stay and help. This power is too potent to allow to lay idle, that would be a sin."

"Just how powerful could he make a vampires power," Jake asked. I knew what he was thinking. If he could do all that for the Cullens, than...

"From what I have seen...he could increase a vampire's power by twelve times what it can normally do."

All eyes turned to Matthew. He leaned back against me, shy at the intensity of the looks everyone was giving him. Or maybe it was the colors he was seeing from them. He made a whimper sound and I brought my hand up and ran in through his hair, he eased up a little and started making these little purring sounds like a cat.

"My god, if Aro got his hands on him he could make the whole covens powers twelve times what they normally are!" Carlisle said.

"Exactly, if Aro learns of Matthew he will stop at nothing to get him," Alice said.

"Have you had a vision?" Esme asked.

"Kind of, those days when my power was growing stronger I saw so many things. I have been trying to make since of it all and I now recall a vision of what Aro would do if he learned of Matthew. He would covet him more than me or Edward, with Matthew he could make the Volturi truly invincible and he would kill us all to get him."

"Then we must make sure Aro never learns of him," Rose said. "My god can you imagine what Jane's power would be like if it was multiplied by twelve?"

We all shuddered at the thought.

"Leah, I have been told Matthew prevented you and you're brother from transforming, correct?" Eleazar asked.

"Yes. We tried but he kept us to calm and collected," I said.

"Another example of his power, Jasper manipulates the chemicals in the brain to manipulate emotions but even he has limits. For instance if he wanted he could turn us all into ravenous beasts, or he could turn a group of murderous mad men into a group of saints. He may very well have one of the most powerful gifts to ever exist. It is so complex, just when I peel back one part a new part shows up."

"Okay so he can sense, see and manipulate emotions, he can make a vampires power stronger by twelve, he can alter peoples personalities, and channel and focus and channel mental energy right?" I asked.

"Exactly. His power is the highest class I have ever seen. Vampires or even humans would kill to have him work for them; you have no idea how lucky you are Carlisle. That you found him before Aro did."

No one said anything. What was there to say? We had a hybrid with a less than stable mind running around with a power that makes him the prize of all the vampire gifts.

"Is Matthew dangerous?" Matthew asked.

I wanted to say yes, to tell him his very existence may put us all in danger. But even I am not that cruel. "No, you just have a great power. You have to learn to control it so you don't hurt people is all," I told him.

"Okay, I will Leah," he said with a smile.

I patted him on the head. "Good boy."

"Let's get started right away then," Eleazar said. He walked over and kneeled in front of me and Matthew. "Matthew can you see the part of me that is...special."

Matthew looked at him with that look that said he was seeing more than what we could. "Yes, you taste like Al-Al or Ed-Ed."

"I knew it! Tell me can you focus on that part? Make it stronger, just a little?" he asked.

"Okay."

"Eleazar be careful," Carmen cautioned.

* * *

 

Matthew P.O.V

People feel lots of things during El-El's speech.

Him say lots of things, like me being ultimate empath and psychic-lens. Me not knowing exactly what he mean, he say me make peoples powers stronger. Then people bring up Volturi and Jane and they get real scared and frightened.

Leah pet my head and me feel better. Me know she is worried but she more calm than worried, me like that.

Words like Volturi and Jane make me feel uneasy. Something stirs in Matthews head, something deep in the pain and fire. Matthew ignore it and listen.

El-El want Matthew to make his power stronger. Just a little he said. Matthew say yes. El-El really excited now. Matthew look deep into El-El. He find what looking for, the part that makes El-El see things. It helps him see into people, understand how they work.

Me focus on that part, me think it get bigger, stronger. Me think it like a small plant, growing bigger and stronger. Me focus with will and part grows bigger. Me try not to think it too big. Just bigger than what it was.

It work, part of El-El grows bigger. His eyes widen in surprise and wonder. Wonder and surprise with a hint of delight come off him. "It is working."

Me stop making bigger. Not too big.

I can see his power more clearly, amazing. I know exactly what he can do, I can see what his limits are." he turn to look at others. Studying them closely. It is the same with all of you. I know exactly what you can do and what you're limits are. But I also know what you could be capable of; I have never been able to read a gift so clearly or well."

He looked at the Leah and Jake-Jake. "I know you are wolves, I know you are shifters, I know all about you having a pack mind and imprinting just by looking at you. I know all your strengths and weakness. I could not see this all before, only on humans and vampires and it was all so nebulous, amazing!"

We practice some more. El-El have me focus power on Kate and Edward little, making them stronger just a bit. Kate sparkle with electricity. Me make her gift so strong being next to her is like being next to an electric fence, her body even hums.

El-El asked Bell-Bell to take down shield. She put it on Ed-Ed and me not see Ed-Ed no more but me see Bell-Bell. Me find part of Bell-Bell that gives her shield and make it stronger to. Bell-Bell learn to make more shields. She make shields expand further out and can even cut it in pieces and give it to people to share.

El-El have me work on emotions, making people happy, making people sad. Making them feel all kinds of things. He have me try power of Jake-Jake. Me make Jake-Jake turn wolf, than human again. He naked like Leah and Seth-Seth be when Me's met them first time.

It was lots of fun using my power. El-El had me return everyone's power to normal. He really happy now. Me happy me make him so happy. Me like happy, happy is fun to be around.

But Leah still not happy. She still upset and angry about something. Matthew wanted to make it go away, wanted her happy. But me not think she like being forced feed things. So Matthew not do nothing. She stay with Matthew whole time, telling him good job when he do good.

Sometime later and wolves decide to leave, Matthew sad to see Leah go again but she swear she come back and see me sooner.

Denali coven stay little while to, help Matthew control power so he not hurt Cullen's again. El-El said it might be tricky because Matthew not have good grasp on reality whatever that mean.

Matthew get tired soon, all this work tire him out and he get sleepy. Me not want to sleep but me have no choice. Body say sleep. Esme take me upstairs for nap. She tuck Matthew in and kiss him and tell him what a good boy he is and how proud she is. I love Es-Es. I hope my mommy is nice like her.

Es-Es left leaving me to sleep. I not want sleep, the fire waiting for me I knows this. But my eyes were so tired. Me close eyes just for one second. Than the fire is there and Matthew is burning.

* * *

 

Leah P.O.V

We left the Cullen's.

It had been four hours of watching Eleazar have Matthew practice with his power.

The best part had been when he made Kate's electrical powers so strong just being near her caused the hair on your body to stick up. When she tapped Garrett with her finger there was a bright light from the point where her finger met his chest and he went flying back. A smoldering spot was on his chest and his shirt was burnt.

Bella, after she put her shield on Edward was able to expand her shield to many miles and was even able to create new shields to give to us individually.

Eleazar was having a field day. He wanted to continue but Matthew grew to tired to continue, he had never used his power so much in such a short amount of time.

Jake let himself be used as a test subject. Matthew caused him to phase and un-phase in a second. It was amazing and a little disturbing to see how easy it was for him to manipulate us all. I remember how he projected emotions like love, sadness, anger, boredom, and joy. It was so intense, more powerful than what Jasper could make you feel.

We phased and ran home. Naturally Jake saw my thoughts and knew about Sam. I didn't really bother to hide them, I was going to be in the wedding and he was going to find out eventually.

" _You don't have to do this Leah," he said._

" _I do. I have to let him go Jake or else I will never get over him."_

" _Leah, let's face it, even if they do get married you will still love him."_

" _I know, but this is final, absolute. I can't keep living like this Jake, I need to move on with my life."_

" _I am proud of how you handled yourself. You would have lost your temper a lot sooner and phase din the old days," he said._

" _Thanks Jake. I am glad I am making the right steps. So Matthew is more powerful than we thought. Eleazar was like a kid in a candy store. I can't believe he made them that strong and that wasn't the full twelve percent."_

" _I know."_ He kept on remembering how effortlessly Matthew changed him from human to wolf. He was worried about Nessie being around such a powerful being.

" _Speaking of Sam I don't think we should tell him about Matthew's power."_

" _We can't lie to him about this Leah, it is to important."_

" _Fine than omit certain details, he is already disturbed enough a hybrid can control our phasing, last thing he needs to know is how powerful Matthew is."_

" _You think he would try and kill Matthew?"_

" _He tried to kill Nessie when he felt she was a threat. I don't want another incident like that happening again."_

" _Me either, maybe you are right."_

" _Of course I am. Just tell him Matthew is a psychic-lens but don't tell him about the whole making vampires stronger thing."_

" _I hate keeping secrets Leah, I am trying to build trust between the two packs."_

" _I understand that but our goal is to protect the humans and the Cullen's. Sam's priority is humans first."_

" _I know. If he asks I will tell him about the emotion stuff but I will leave out the increasing power bit. For now at least."_

" _Good. I have enough to deal with, last thing I need is him breathing down mu neck about Matthew."_

" _He sure has taken a shine to you Leah."_

" _I know."_

" _Wonder why?"_

" _Who knows."_

" _I think it is good. He can help show you what taking care of a kid is like."_

" _If I had a dick this is where I would tell you to suck it."_

" _You know what I mean Leah, I know you have considered the adoption thing."_

" _Not for a while."_

" _Still, maybe taking care of him will help smooth over your feelings about not being able to have kids."_

I didn't say anything. I can't help but be drawn to the little freak. Even knowing where he came from. I remembered what he said that night we met, how he understood pain and loneliness. The kid had it more rough than I did. I went through a bad time, but I had mom and Seth at least.

Matthew had no one. He had been left all alone in the world to fend for himself. No memories except a pain so powerful it damaged his grip on reality. I knew loneliness because I was the only female wolf and while everyone else was enjoying it I was not. No one knew what I was going through, they were happy for Sam and Emily, they loved being wolves, I did not.

Was it my own suffering that drew Matthew to me? Maybe that old saying of misery loving company had some truth to it after all.

I think I will go visit him soon. It is either that or talk to Sam and Emily about the wedding. Plus it would be a good excuse to get out of the house. And a good excuse to stay away from Sam.

* * *

 

Matthew P.O.V

Matthew wake up screaming.

Me dream me on fire, me dream me in great pain. Es-Es, Car-Car were holding Matthew as he thrashed around. Me cry into their shoulders and they whisper it will be okay and stuff like that.

They ask why I scream and I tells them it because of the fire. They get me some chocolate milk to drink. Matthew not like human food much, me prefer blood. But me like chocolate milk. It leave good pleasant taste in mouth. While Matthew drink Car-car pat back and sing me songs.

Me not want to go to sleep, the fire waiting for Matthew.

Matthew know everyone curious and worried for him, me knows they heard me screaming. He can see the colors and they tell him so. No one says anything when Es-Es say me have bad dream. Me go sit with Nessie and she uses power to show me things.

Grown ups talk about Matthew mostly, El-El had said what experiments he would like to do with Matthew. He talk about calling in other vampires Cullen's know to test power on them. Car-Car think it best keep me secret now so Aro and Volturi not know about me.

I ask Nessie what Volturi is and she show me thems. They be vampires who are mean and nasty. They keep all vampires in world in line. They really scary too. They come long time ago to hurt Nessie and Cullen's, they think she immortal child but she not so they go away.

She show me other friends Cullen's knew who came to help. She show me picture of Nahuel. He hybrid like us only much older. She tell me Car-Car and others thinking he might be my brother because we look similar.

Me and Nessie go upstairs so I can talk to hims. He still talking with Eleazar and some others.

"Car-Car, can I meets Nahuel?"

"How do you know about Nahuel?" Car-Car asked.

"I showed him grandpa," Ness-Ness said.

"Why do you want to meet him?"

"Ness-Ness say you think he might be brother, maybe daddy is with him."

Doubt colored Car-Car. He doubting something. Maybe he doubting daddy with Nahuel. I hope daddy with Nahuel, me miss daddy. Whoever he be.

"Well I am sorry to say Nahuel has not seen his father for a long time. They did not get along much I am afraid."

"Oh."

"But I am going to contact him and have him visit. I can find out if he is your brother."

I like that lots. "Okay, I cannot wait to meet him!" I says.

Me and Ness-Ness leave them to talk. We go downstairs to eat some yukky human food. Me wrestle with Em-Em. Em-Em big and strong so he wins. He tickles Matthew when he had Matthew pinned and then Ness-Ness come save Matthew and together we wrestle Em-Em.

People watch and laughs as we play. People give off love, affection, fun. Matthew likes feelings. Matthew likes Cullen's and Denali's. Me wishes Leah was here though, me think she needs some happiness.

* * *

 

Carlisle P.O.V

We listened as the children wrestled with Emmett. I hope they are careful. I do not want Emmett to get to rough with them.

"Do you think this Joham could be his father?" Eleazar asked.

"He could be. Nahuel said when his father visited him he brought his four daughters with him. But that was a long time ago, who's to say in that time he has not had more children," I said.

"I believe Aro intended to visit Joham when Nahuel revealed his father's plans to create a super race."

"Exactly so for all we know Joham could be dead. Nahuel said he did not look after the mothers once he impregnated them so Matthew could be a result of Joham finding some poor woman and seducing her. How she could have managed to survive and keep the birth secret long enough to carry him to term is anyone's guess. But what caused him to lose his memory and how does he know his name is Matthew and how does he know his father was a vampire?"

"Maybe this Nahuel can shed some light."

"I hope so. If not I hope the tests come back positive. Nahuel did not have a close relationship with his sisters and I hope having a little brother might help him work out the issues he has with his own existence."

"Let's say Joham is alive, what will you do if he comes to claim his son?" he asked.

"The thought has entered my mind. If Matthew is his son it does give him a certain right and Matthew does seem to have some affection for him."

"All boys have affection for their father."

That was true. I may have butted heads with my father and disagreed with him but I still loved him.

"In the even he does come looking for the boy I think it best we try and keep him out of his reach. I shudder to think how Matthew could help him with his plans."

"Indeed. I do not think his birth was just any old accident either. When he increased my power I could see something odd."

"Odd?"

"I don't know how I knew it, but his creation was not a just a vampire finding some random woman to have his way with. His blood is very potent you see. Almost like what he has was bred into him."

"Is that even possible?" I asked.

"It is. During my early days with the Volturi I did research on the possibility of abilities being linked to genetic inheritance. Like how Alec and Jane have powers as did Aro and his sister Didyme."

"Yes I recall, I read a copy while I stayed with them."

"I traveled the world, finding vampires for Aro with special abilities. I discovered that eighty percent of the vampires who had a relative who was also a vampire had special abilities. Twenty percent however had relatives who had no power at all. But remember Nessie's power is a reversal of both her parents."

I leaned back in my chair thoughtful. "So you think who ever the father is, the mother would have some special power in her bloodline and that is why he selected her?"

"Yes, like I said it is a theory. Remember twenty percent of the vampires with a relative who had a power who was also a vampire had no powers at all. So it could be just coincidence that the vampire chose his mother."

"Hmm. Edward has a tough time reading Charlie. Maybe Bella got her shield from him."

"I never got to finish my research though. I left the Volturi shortly after I showed Aro my work. He seemed interested by it but it was all a lot of guess work and theories, nothing solid."

"You saw how powerful his blood is just by looking?"

"Amazing I know. I think had I been in front of a human with a gift I would have known exactly what it was which is almost impossible for me to know exactly the power unless they turn into a vampire. Matthew is a powerful resource Carlisle, you have truly found the best power to have."

"Thank you Eleazar, I thank you for helping us. When his power caused our traits to go haywire it was amazing. It never occurred to me I was acting odd." Not even when I donated half our money to Alex's lemonade stand. It was going to be a while before we saved our money back up to what it was but we had plenty of time, also helped having a daughter who could see the future.

I sent Jasper and Alice to go find Nahuel and his aunt Huilen a few hours later. They lived in the mountains of Chile so we knew exactly where to find them.

I have been trying to figure out how to get Matthew to remember. I have considered hypnotic-therapy but I would rather wait a while before we attempt that. Sometimes the mind makes us forgets things because they are too painful to remember and the last thing I want to do was destroy what little semblance of reality he had left.

I considered Eleazar's words. About gifts being genetic, about the possibility of a vampire choosing poor human females to bear his children just so he could have offspring with powers disgusted me. Wasting life for such things. As if having a power is more important that another's life, especially considering what happens to the poor women who have a hybrid child.

As much as I would like to know if Eleazar's theory of passing gifts through blood is possible there is only one way to do that and I am not going to breed humans and turn them into vampires just for the sake of curiosity.

However that doesn't mean somewhere out there in the world there isn't a vampire who isn't willing to do it.

 

**Fusedtwilight: Don, don, don. So Matthew is a psychic-len's and is really powerful. Next chapter Matthew meet's Nahuel, is there a connection between them. Stay tuned and please review.**


	5. Chapter 5

Focused Madness

Chapter 5

 

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing. Get you're tissues ready because this chapter is a tear jerker and we finally get some clues to Matthew's past.**

 

Esme P.O.V

"Matthew stop fussing," I chastised him.

He scrunched his face up, clearly displeased. Nahuel and Huilen were on their way. Jasper and Alice had phoned us and told us the good news.

It had been three days since they had left. Nahuel and his aunt were hard to find at first. Since the incident with the Volturi they had been keeping a low profile, fearful the Volturi would come to finish them off.

I had made Matthew dress up and tidy his hair. Like all boys his age he made such a fuss. He did not like to dress neat and proper, he was to wild for that, he preferred to run around in a pair of shorts and barefoot much like the wolf boys. Normally I let him as long as he kept clean at least. But since this was an important occasion and we did have guests I wanted him to look his best.

He looked so adorable. His hair was neat and trimmed and combed to the side, he wore a button up shirt and a white shirt underneath it with a nice tan cotton shorts to go with it, along with socks and black shoes.

"I hate dressing up," he complained.

"We have guests coming over you need to look you're best, don't you want to impress them?" I asked.

He looked away in defiance and I laughed. Leah had come over to visit which delighted me to see her come over more often. I always gave her a hug when I saw her. I know all about her story and I feel so guilty. Our presence in Forks caused her lover to turn into a wolf and imprint on her cousin, how sad.

I wish I could take her pain away and make her life better, but even I don't have that kind of power. I had noticed a change in her these last few months. She had become more calm, more confidant in herself. I think being Jacob's second in command made her have expectations of herself and she was doing everyone proud.

I also notice she seemed to be taking real liking to Matthew. It had been reluctant at first but the more time she spent with him the more she seemed to like him.

She sat on the couch watching me dress Matthew. "You look good Matthew," she said.

"Really?" he asked.

She smiled. "Really, I dare say you are more attractive than the other men in the house."

The words had their affect. His face brightened and a smug kind of pride filled his eyes. I looked over at Leah and smiled.

Nessie came in and sat down, she was dressed in a little white dress, she was excited to see Nahuel again. Matthew was a little nervous. I do hope they are brothers; they both need a relative to connect to, Matthew more than Nahuel who had his aunt.

A knock on the door told us they were here. I could hear the sound of Nahuel's heart beat.

"They're here!" Nessie said excitedly.

Leah walked over to Matthew and took his hand. "Don't worry Matthew, I will be here."

"Okay," he said softly.

We went to go greet Nahuel and his aunt at the front door where everyone else was. I could hear Carlisle introducing everyone formally to Nahuel and his aunt.

Matthew held Leah's hand and Nessie held mine. We walked down stairs to meet Nahuel and I prayed that everything would go okay for the two.

* * *

 

Leah P.O.V

Matthew's heart was beating like mad. Had he been human he would be dead. No human could have a heart beat that quick and live to tell the tale.

We walked down the steps; Nahuel and his aunt were greeting everyone. I saw her eyes were red. A fought back the urge to growl. Fucking human eating bitch!

Matthew looked at me curiously, he must have sensed my anger. I did my best to calm myself, this was supposed to be about Matthew trying to connect with a potential family member. If I showed hostility to either than it could affect how he views them.

Nahuel froze when he spotted us. All eyes turned to us as we came downstairs. We walked over to Nahuel and his aunt and Nessie ran to him and gave him a hug. "Hello Nahuel, hello Miss. Huilen," she greeted.

"My you have grown so much. And please call me Huilen," Huilen said greeting Nessie with a smile. She turned to her nephew. "She reminds me of you Nahuel, you grew so fast."

Nahuel paid no attention to her. He was completely focused on Matthew. Matthew was frozen; he clutched my hand tightly in fear. "It's okay Matthew, go on," I urged him.

Matthew let go and stepped forward. "Hi, me is being Matthew."

I did a quick study of Matthew and Nahuel. Studying their features, their similarities. Trying to see how closely related they were. They had the same nose, the same jawline. They both had the same color skin, they both had the same dark hair, the same brown skin.

But Matthew was still young, still growing up. Who knows, maybe when he turns seven we can tell if they look more similar.

Nahuel bent down on his knee and offered his hand to Matthew. Matthew took it and they shook hands. "Hello Matthew I am Nahuel."

They shook hands and Matthew seemed to lose some of the tension he had. Huilen was giving Matthew a hard look, I felt a little protective seeing those red eyes scrutinizing Matthew so intensely. But then I realized she was just checking the similarities like I was.

"You are a boy hybrid likes me? I thoughts I was only one," Matthew said.

"For a long time I thought I was the only one too," Nahuel said.

"Then you met me," Nessie said with a smile.

"Are there mores of us? Are there mores hybrids?" Matthew asked.

They both looked at Nahuel, both wanting to know if they were the only ones in the world. The more the merrier I guess.

"I don't know," Nauel said. There was a smile on his face but I could see the sadness in his eyes.

I remember his speech. I remember him saying he had four sisters. But I also remember that Aro guy saying they were going to pay his daddy a visit, he asked them to spare his sisters saying they were innocent. But I doubt they would have spared them. Mercy was not in the Volturi's dictionary.

Then who knows? Aro being the collector freak he is may have spared them to study them or to have them in his collection. How was Nahuel to know? For all he knew he could have lost his siblings to the Volturi when he testified. I wonder if he regrets testifying.

"You're sad now," Matthew said.

"A little," Nahuel said.

Matthew hugged him. "Don't be, we haves one another now."

Nessie joined in on the hug and it was a big awwwww, moment. I was happy for both Nessie and Matthew. Hell I was a little happy for Nauel. Being the only one of your kind can blow. But here they were, three hybrids, one spent the majority of his life thinking he was an evil creation. Another born under extreme circumstances, her life threatened by people who wanted her dead because they thought she was a danger, and the last who has no past, his only memory of a pain so intense it haunts him in his dreams.

I know about his aversion to sleep, I know if he dreams it is only of the fire. I know he wakes up screaming.

But now they have each other, each having gone through their own trial and tribulation, each one overcoming some great obstacle to get to this point. Where they would meet one another. It was truly amazing.

First Carlisle took some D.N.A samples from both Matthew and Nahuel. He had some devices he had in their basement where he could do the tests, we would know in a week if they were related.

One week later and I was over at Sam and Emily's.

We sat at the table and it was awkward and uncomfortable as hell. Emily had made us all tea, which was good because my nerves were fried.

Why was I here? Easy, we had to go over wedding details.

"So I was thinking we have the ceremony by the beach," Emily was saying.

"You sure that us a good idea? You know what the weather is like out here," I said.

"I know but I really want to do an outside wedding. It would be cheaper that way."

"Em, you know money isn't an issue," Sam said.

"Money is an issue Sam," Emily said firmly.

I looked between Sam and Emily. I guess they were hitting their newlywed blues before they hit the alter. "Sam is so obsessed with me being happy he is letting it over ride his common sense," Emily said.

"Emily is convinced we are having money issues when we are not," Sam said.

"Sam we have bills to pay and you have been missing a lot of work because of the pack, if we spend money on a church than we will get piled with payments."

"Well maybe you should just wait a while," I suggested. "When you are more financially stable."

They looked at one another. "It is a good idea; we waited this long, what's a little longer?" Emily said.

"You're right, I just wish we could do it already, I am tired of putting our lives on hold because of pack business," Sam said.

"You could ask the Cullens for the money, all the times we helped save their asses they owe us big any way," I said.

I meant it as a joke but obviously Sam had lost his sense of humor a when he became a wolf. "I would sooner die," he said coldly.

"I was just kidding," I bit back.

My cell rang. I checked the caller I.D. It was Jake. "Hello?"

"Leah, the results are back."

I knew what results he meant. "And?"

"Matthew wants to wait for you to come before we find out."

"What? Why?"

"He said he wants you here for the test results."

I sighed. "Okay I will be right over."

I hanged up the phone and downed my tea. "Sorry got to go; they need me over at the Cullen's."

Sam and Emily got up. Emily hugged me and Sam too. I wish he hadn't, a nice handshake or wave would have done.

"Come back soon, you should come over for dinner some time," she said.

"Sure, maybe some other time," I said.

I made my way over to the Cullen's as soon could. Nahuel and his aunt were still here. Nauel, Nessie and Matthew had spent much time together this last week. Matthew hero worshiped Nauel. You could see it in his eyes clear as day.

He spent more time with Nauel than Nessie which made her a little jealous. I had sadly been spending much of my week over at the Cullen's. I had hoped with the Denali coven and Nauel to distract him he would forget about little old me. No such luck.

I admit it, I do enjoy spending time with Matthew. He made being at the Cullen's bearable. Nessie wasn't too bad either. My time was usually spent watching them play or helping Matthew take a bath.

Yes I help bath him. He was like any little boy; he did not like his baths. He liked swimming though, one nice day we took them swimming to a nearby creek. The sun was out and all the vampires came to swim as well. Nahuel and his aunt were the only ones who did not have swim suits. Huilen did not swim; she was content to watch her nephew swim.

Jake and I went along with Seth. Quil and Embry came along as well. Claire was with her parents visiting some relatives up in Makah so Quil had nothing better to do. Embry was tempted to come by Jake when he mentioned Esme would cook for us. Esme may have a power that gives her unnatural culinary abilities. I would gladly kill to get a sample of her food.

The sun had been out so all the vampires sparkled when the sun hit them. The hybrids glowed slightly but no sparkle. A human might not notice it, but the glow helped add to the inhuman beauty of the hybrids, making them seem more heavenly.

Nessie and Matthew shot through the creek like little torpedo's, sending water everywhere. Esme had made food for the hybrids and us wolves which was soon gone.

My hormones were going into overdrive. Seeing all the men in nothing but swim suites was wrecking havoc on my body. Vampires may smell horrible but they look amazing. In the sun light sparkling they look dazzling. My eyes kept on shifting to Nahuel who wore a loin cloth and nothing more.

He looked like a GQ model from Brazil getting ready to do a naughty swim suit edition. My eyes nearly bugged out when I saw him walk out of the water, his hands running through his hair, beads of water running down his chest.

I tried my best to control my emotions and my thoughts, the last thing I need is Edward hearing my thoughts (which included some very inappropriate fantasies) or Jasper feeling how horny I was. I hoped Matthew didn't say anything; I would die of embarrassment if he let it slip what affect the men were having on me. Plus the pack would never let me live it down.

It wouldn't be the first time a wolf has dreamed of a leech, I remember when Seth had that wet dream about Esme. Let's just say it was a naughty schoolboy being punished buy his teacher kind of dream. Ew.

I noticed Tanya eying Nahuel up. I wonder if she was just interested in a quick fuck with him or if she was starting to look for that lucky guy to spend her undead life with. I know Tanya is really old, older than Carlisle even and was a major sex nympho. But I had to wonder if being the only one in her family without a lover was making her rethink her options.

Matthew and Nessie squealed in delight when Emmett cannonballed right into the creek, sending a wave of water over everyone and getting them wet. It was more fun than I expected it. I caught Matthew looking at me and smiling. I smiled back. He must be happy to see I was having fun.

We had asked Nahuel about Joham. We asked him if he knew about anymore children his father might have had. "I have not seen my father for over a century. I would not be surprised if he sired more children since then," he had said. He also had not heard anything about the Volturi paying Joham a little visit or not. So for all we know Joham could be dead or alive. If he was alive and came for Matthew I would kill the prick.

Matthew was too powerful to be influenced by Joham, plus if Joham wanted him he should have kept better watch over him. Plus being a female and knowing how he just uses women for breeding really pissed me the fuck off. I remember what it was like for Bella and the thought of some poor girl going through that for a man who didn't love her made my blood run hot.

I phased back to human once I got close enough to the Cullen's and ran the rest of the way there. Edward opened the door and let me inside before I had the chance to knock. I came inside and we walked up to the living room. The atmosphere was tense, full of excitement, everyone wanted to see if if they were related but they had to wait on me.

"Leah!" Matthew said. He was always so happy to see me. He got up from his seat on the couch next to Nahuel. I sat down and Matthew sat on my lap. It didn't bother me when he did it anymore. Once he sat down my hand went to his head and began to play with his hair. It was getting a little long, it reached his shoulders, we were going to have to cut it soon.

Carlisle held a yellow folder. "Well I have gotten the tests back." he opened the folder and took out the paper and read it. The air thickened with anticipation, like on one of those talk shows when they do a paternity test and the audience is so quiet, waiting to learn the daddy's identity.

"According to the test Nahuel and Matthew share enough genetic markers to be related. The tests confirm it, you two are brothers."

Matthew cheered and jumped over to Nahuel and hugged him tight. "Big brother, Matthew is having a big brother!"

Nahuel looked stunned, happy and amazed. He hugged Matthew and I saw a glimmer of tears in his eyes. So this confirmed it, Joham was their father.

Huilen looked so happy for her nephew. She must be so glad he could have another family member to connect with. Someone who Joham had not brainwashed into thinking they were better than humanity. Having a sibling can both be a blessing and a curse. Sure you fight with them, get frustrated with them and there may be times when you think you never want to see them or speak with them, but in the end siblings look out for one another and they can always depend on one another.

So in the end we found out who his father is and found his brother. But we still had no answers as to his past or how wound up in Forks. Maybe it was for the best. He got the one thing many people would kill for, a fresh start a new beginning. Lord knows I could use one of those.

* * *

 

Matthew P.O.V

Matthew sitting next to brother Nahuel.

Brother Nahuel so happy right now, Matthew happy too! Me is having a big brother. When me grow up me wants to be like brother Nahuel.

We's sitting with Ness-Ness now. She showing us book from Car-Car's study room. It book with pictures in it. Pictures of angels. She showing us the different kinds of angels the book showed.

"What this?" I asked Ness-Ness.

We be on the last angel. I looked weird. It have six wings, all attached to a glowing face. Me is wondering where the rest of body is?

"That is a seraph," Ness-Ness said.

"Seraph?" I asked.

"They are also called seraphim. They are the highest class of angels; they float around God and sing to him. Their name means-"

"The burning ones," me is saying.

"Wow, how did you know that?" Nessie asked.

"Matthew are you okay?" Nahuel asked.

No, me is not being okay. That word, seraphim. It sound so familiar. It have some great meaning to me's. An image flashed in me's head. Me clutch head in pain. Me trying to remember something, me not know what, but the more me think of seraphim, of burning one's the more head hurts.

Burning one. Matthew burning now, head on fire! It hurted, I hurted really bad now. Me clutch head and howl in pain. Images flashing through eyes now. Me trying to remember but head not want to remember but me still trying.

"Carlisle!" Nahuel yelled.

Car-Car appear with some others. They hold onto Matthew as he screams in pain. "Matthew what is it?" Car-Car asked.

"Head...hurted so bad now. The fire, it burning me ups."

Me cry now, head feel like it is splitting. The images floating just over the surface. Like over boiling water, every time Matthew try to grab them they hurt him.

"He is remembering something from his past," Ed-Ed said.

"Matthew? Matthew!" Leah appear in front of Matthew, she very worried now.

"Leah, make the pain stop, it hurts!" I begged her.

"Do something," she said to Car-Car.

"Matthew what are you trying to remember?" Car-Car asked.

"I was telling him about the angels in heaven and when I told him about the seraphim-"

"Not seraphim," me say.

Image in my head now. Woman, dark curly hair, deep blue eyes, light dark skin, like me's and Nahuels only lighter. Like coffee with lots of cream in it. Her body wreathed in flames, but she not in pain. The fire moves and flows with her will. She smiles, confidant and prideful. She raises her hand and flames leap forward and things burn.

A name flashed across my mind like a comet, the pain so intense all I could do was scream a name.

"Serephina!" I yell, thank I go dark and I for once not burn.

* * *

 

Leah P.O.V

"What the hell was that!"

We were in the basement an hour later, Matthew was unconscious. Carlisle had him hooked up to a bunch of machines that monitored his heart beat, blood pressure, all that stuff.

"I believe Matthew's mind tried to remember something of his past, but the memory was beyond the pain and he had to go through that before he could get the memory," Carlisle said checking Matthew's stats.

"Who or what is Serephina?" Nahuel asked.

"It is the feminine version of seraphim," Carlisle answered.

"Who is she? You said seraphim are known as the burning ones, is she the one who did this to him?" if she did the bitch better find a nice hole to hide under for the next thousand years.

Edward answered. "I don't think so. There was a sense of familiarity. In the memory he felt comfortable, safe even in her presence. I think she may have been his sister."

"What? I do not have a sister called Serephina," Nahuel said.

"Remember the last time you saw you're father was over a century ago Nahuel, for all we know you could very well," Carlisle said.

"I know she wasn't human," Edward said.

"What do you mean? What did you see?" I asked.

He described what the chick looked like. How fire danced around her body and how she could control it.

"Sounds like what Benjamin can do," Carlisle said.

"Benjamin does not have that level of control over fire yet," Edward said.

"So what do we do? How do we help Matthew?" I asked.

"His mind has shut down, the strain of the pain and trying to remember her was too much for him to handle so it shut down to protect itself."

"He's in a coma?" I asked.

"Yes."

"Fuck!" I cursed.

"Will he be alright? Will he make it out?" Nahuel asked. He held Matthew's hand in his, there was a painful look in his eyes. Pain and anger. He was angry his brother whom he just found was hurting and he could do nothing to help him.

"He is stable right now, we just have to give him time to pull through on his own," Carlisle said.

"How long will he be out?" I asked.

"Hard to say. The coma is light so maybe a few days, maybe more than a week. As long as it takes."

I looked to Edward. "Do not worry, he is not dreaming, he is not burning," he said.

Thank God. I ran my hand through his hair. He was so peaceful looking right now. His breathing was soft and even. "I think I will stay a while, I want to be here when he wakes up," I said.

"You are more than welcome," Carlisle said.

"I just wish there was a way we could help him get his memories back without hurting him!" Nahuel said.

Edward looked at Carlisle and Carlisle looked away. "What? What is it?" I asked.

"Nothing," Carlisle said.

"Bullshit I saw that, Edward looked at you and it was a 'you should tell them look.'"

"Well I have come up with an idea."

I looked to Nahuel, he nodded.

"Were all ears doc."

"Well as you recall when Edwards's powers grew strong enough he was able to actually read minds instead of just hearing thoughts."

"Yeah...oh! You want him to juice up Edwards power so Edward can go inside his head and see what he has forgotten."

"Can you do that?" Nahuel asked.

"Right now no. But once he wakes up it could be done. Carlisle thinks if we try hypnotic-therapy it could help as well."

"You want to hypnotize him?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

"It does work; I have practiced it for the last two decades. I could hypnotize him and help guide him past the pain and Edward can go into his mind. I cannot guarantee that it would work however."

"We should discuss it with Matthew when he wakes up," Nahuel said.

"I agree," I said.

There was a knock on the door. Edward opened it and Nessie came through with Jake, she held a book in her hands. It was _the_ _Lion, the witch and the wardrobe_. "Can I read to Matthew?" she asked.

I looked over to Nahuel and he nodded. "Of course you can," I said.

We pulled up a seat and Jake sat down and Nessie crawled up on his lap, she opened the book and began to read to Matthew. I suddenly found myself tired. I had been so stressed out about Matthew I had worm myself out. Nessie's voice was perfect and beautiful like wind chimes. Soothing, calm. By the fifth chapter I was asleep.

* * *

 

_I dreamed me and Matthew were running through the woods._

_The mean witch was coming after us, I had to protect him. If the witch got him I would never see him again._

" _I'm scared Leah, don't let thems takes mes again," he cried._

" _I will protect you, I promise," I said._

_Than the witch appeared from the darkness. Fire wrapped around her, dancing around her like something living. Six pairs of wings shined from behind her, her blue eyes burned like blue fire, a cruel smile played on her beautiful lips._

_We ran as fast as we could but it seemed like something kept us from moving. Some invisible force pulled on Matthew so no matter how hard I held on I could not hold him._

" _Leah helps me!"_

" _Don't let go!" I screamed._

_I lost my grip on him and he was pulled toward the witch. He called for me, crying, begging for me to help him. I tried to run to him, to grab him and run, but the same invisible force kept me from him. I called his name over and over, tears ran down my cheeks._

_A man appeared behind the witch, his skin dark, his hair black. He had the same nose as Matthew, the same jaw line. "He is my son, mine, you were just the Joseph," the man said._

_Matthew held his arms out to me, begging pleading. The witch held out her arms, as if to welcome him. The fire spread out and wrapped around Matthew, burning him. I watched in horror as the fire blacked his skin and reduced him to ash._

_Then I woke up._

 

I woke with a jump. I looked around the room wildly. We were still in the basement. Nessie and Jake were gone. How long had I been asleep?

"Are you okay?" Nahuel asked me.

"Yeah, it was just a dream."

A really bad, really real, really fucked up dream.

 

**Fusedtwilight: Next chapter we finally get more hints of his past. What could possibly go wrong?...okay if you read my fics you know someone is going to suffer and bad. I can't help it, a twi-fic isn't a twi-fic without some angst.**


	6. Chapter 6

Focused Madness

Chapter 6

 

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing and thanks too all you reviewers who are loving this story. Now I know I promised that we would get a hint about Matthew's past and some bad stuff would happen this chapter but I decided too save that for the next chapter.**

**This chapter is all about Leah, a quick P.O.V from Matthew but otherwise all Leah.**

 

Matthew P.O.V

Me wake up now. Head hurt, eyes hurt. Light hurt eyes.

Me hear two heart beats. One faster than the other is being. Me smell Leah and big brother Nahuel. Me look and see they both being asleep.

Me in a bed, like ones in hospital. String things attached to chest and head. Thing on stick going beep, beep, beep, beep .Which is being funny seeing how it beeps when heart beats.

Me wonder how long me be here? Me wonder what happen? Me remember Ness-Ness showing picture of angel thing with six wings and head covered in light. Then like faint echo image of woman covered in fire. Me is confused on why she on fire and not screaming in pain. In fact it almost like fire not burning her, it like she control fire.

Because she control fire. That why she called Seraphina for she is the burning one. She is the one who controls fire.

Who is she though? She seems so familiar. It like me should be knowing her. Like me had always known her. Leah sleeping now as is Nahuel, me not want to wake them. They are peaceful, resting. Me reach out hand and move hair from Leah's face. She have smile and she have pleasant feelings. She must be having good dream.

Me glad for that. Leah usually sad or angry when she awake, if she not happy in dreams than me would have to make her happy. Me never make her feel stuff since me make her calm on first meeting.

Me pet Leah's head like how Leah pet mine when I sit on her lap. Me careful not to be waking her up. Soon however Matthew is going back to sleep. Last thing he do is pet Leah's head. Matthew not fight it, Matthew not scared of fire, Leah is here with Matthew. Matthew have Leah so Matthew not being scared.

* * *

 

Leah P.O.V

I woke up to the sound of my phone ringing. I had been dreaming I had been chasing a deer in the woods. Odd but not the first time I have dreamed such things. Sometimes the wolf part crosses over in our dreams and we dream wolf stuff.

Matthew's hand was on my head, I wondered if he had woken up or if he had reached out for me in his sleep. I gently moved it off me and I quickly answered my phone so not to wake Nahuel or Matthew. It was home. "Hello?" I whispered.

"Leah? Where are you?" mom quickly asked sounding worried. "Are you out patrolling?"

I wanted to tell her to be quiet. With our enhanced hearing she sounds like she is screaming.

"No, I am still at the Cullen's," I said.

"The Cullen's? Why in the name of god are you over there? I thought you were going over to Sam and Emily's?"

"I did but Jake called me in. Matthew needed me to be here."

"Did Jake really need you for that? I am sure one of the Cullen women would be enough for the boy to coddle him."

"He asked for me directly mom," I said getting defensive. I did not like the annoyed sound in her voice.

"Leah you didn't imprint on him did you?" she asked sounding fearful.

I sighed. "No mom, I think Jake and Quil are enough don't you?"

"Well you know how it works. Obviously you could be any age or species to be imprinted on. Plus you have been spending a lot of time there," she said.

"What time is it?" I asked.

"Ten p.m."

"Crap. I'll be home soon," I said.

"Okay, next time call me if you are going to be gone late, I was so worried."

"I will mom, I love you." I hanged up the phone and rubbed the bridge between my nose and forehead. I can't believe I slept that long. I looked at Matthew he was still sleeping. He seemed to be peaceful and the monitors were beeping normal.

"Are you leaving?"

I jumped. I had almost forgotten Nahuel was there. I thought he was asleep still.

"I am sorry, I did not mean to startle you," he said.

"No, did I wake you?" I asked.

"No, I have been awake for a few moments. I was just watching him sleep," he said.

I stretched. "Any change?"

"Not that I am aware. He is still sleeping."

"God I hope he will be okay after this," I said.

Nahuel looked at me funny. He opened his mouth like he was going to ask a question but closed his mouth. I heard footsteps and a few moments later Edward walked in. "He is fine, he was up earlier but he went back to sleep. Carlisle thinks he is in the clear, he just needs rest."

"Where is Jake?" I asked.

"Left a few hours ago."

That dick! He could have woken me up!"

Edward chuckled. "He thought you would want to stay."

I got up and stretched. I decided to leave, Matthew was in the all clear and I need to go home. If I spend the night I have a feeling mom would give me one hell of a talking to. She did not like how much time me and Seth spent here. The only reason I was here was because of Matthew. Seth just enjoyed the Cullen's company. That and his man crush on Edward.

Edward frowned. ' _What? He does have a weird liking for you'_ I thought.

"You are welcome to spend the night Leah," Edward said in a voice that let me know he was trying to be polite after what I just thought.

"No, I need to go home." no way could I sleep here. The smell alone would keep me up.

"I shall accompany you," Nahuel said. "A lady should not be alone in the woods at this time."

"Believe me Nahuel Leah is three times scarier than anything that the forest could hold," Edward said with a smile.

"You're one to talk, how many mountain lions have you offed?" I scowled at him.

"Only enough to help keep the humans safe. I never eat more than I should," he said.

I looked over at Matthew's sleeping form. What if he woke up and I wasn't here?

"He already saw you and Nahuel when he was up earlier, if he asks for you or if anything comes up we will call you," Edward said.

"Thank you." I headed out and Nahuel followed me. When we got upstairs I figured he was serious about accompanying me.

"Seriously you don't have to come with me," I said.

"Seriously I do, I wish to speak with you," he said.

Esme and Carlisle saw us out, Esme asked if I would like anything to eat before I left and although I was tempted I decided not. I asked Carlisle to call me if anything came up no matter the time and he smiled and promised he would. We walked out of the house, Nahuel kept on glancing at me. I waited until we were close to the trees before I asked him. "What did you want to talk about?"

"Let's move farther away, I do not want to be interrupted," he said, "can you run fast in this form?"

I can run fast even in human form. We all could. Faster than a human could, but nowhere near as fast as we could if we were in our wolf form. "Not as fast as you but I can run faster than any human."

"Okay, you lead, I will follow you," he said.

I ran for the border, Nahuel followed me flawlessly. Keeping up with me like it was no big deal. I stopped running when we were five miles from the border. I turned to him. "So what did you want to talk about?" I asked.

To my surprise he bowed his head to me. "I wish to thank you for taking care of my brother."

"Look if there is anyone you should be thanking it is the Cullens. They found him, they took him in. I was willing to kill him the first time we met." Probably should have left that last bit out. What if he got pissed and tried to bite me, he had venom and vampire venom is lethal to my kind.

I have never seen what happens when a vampire bites us but according to the books the elders have kept over the generations it is slow and painful. It works like how it would on humans, the venom slowly spreads through our body causing an unbelievable painful burning, but our body rejects the pain and we do not transform so when it hits our hearts after three days we die.

Those before us who had been bit had to be put down. What was the point of going through three days of hell when you were dead anyway?

"I know all of your first interaction with him, he told me. He does that. Speaks about you a lot, even when you are not there." he smiled. "He says 'You should see Leah in her wolfie form, she is being so pretty, her fur is being a silver color and she is being really fast. She faster than all other wolves'," he said doing a good imitation of Matthew's voice.

I smiled. "He is a good kid."

"Yes he is. I thought I was the only one of my family alive. Except for my aunt Huilen I mean. When the Volturi left I feared they would have killed all my sisters, I felt such guilt in knowing that. But thanks to you and the Cullens I have him, I finally have a sibling who I can meet with and talk with. My sisters did not wish to talk with me; they thought me odd for thinking I was evil, for thinking it was wrong to kill humans so remorselessly."

"You have nothing to be thankful to me for Nahuel," I said.

He took a step forward. "Don't I? I see how you two interact. Every time he needs you, you are there, you care for him, and you nurture him. You are very motherly to him you know."

Of course I knew that. I wasn't blind. In this past month I had become oddly close to him, I don't know why. I had been so ready to kill him when I first met him. Now here I was falling asleep by his side after he goes into a coma. Was it his power? Was he using his power to make me feel so attached to him? No, if he was the Cullen's would have told me.

He was just a kid. A hybrid sure but still a kid. Even more so because of his behavior. Whatever happened to him left a big mark on him. Even when he fully physically matures he might never mentally. By the time he is seven he could still be referring to himself in the third person. Hell for all I know for the rest of his unnatural life he will be a child in mind and heart.

Maybe that was why I was drawn to him. His innocence. Maybe it was his own pain I was drawn to, having gone through my own not too long ago I knew suffering well, I knew loneliness and isolation better than most. Matthew and I had a lot in common and maybe that is why I connected with him so quickly.

Pain can be just a powerful bond as love, when people go through the same kind of pain it creates a link, something strong, a knowledge that only you and they can understand. It makes you stick together.

Nahuel was really close to me now. I could smell him. He smelled so good. He smelled like a bit of vampire only without the nose burning smell. He also smelled spicy and warm. I wanted to bury my nose in his hair and smell; I wanted to roll around in him until his scent clung to me.

That was another odd wolf instinct that bled into our human mind even in human form. When we find a smell we like we want to rub up against it or make it cling to us to carry around. In the wild when a wolf finds something that smells good he or she will rub against it or roll around it to make the smell cling to them.

I know those with imprints have a strong desire to do that, of course what would smell better than a wolf's imprint. Nahuel is not my imprint but he smell really good. However I resisted my urge to do that. I was a human being not a wolf, for now anyway.

"I know you have no reason to want to be near him, I know vampires are your natural enemy, but still you stay with him, why?"

I took a deep breath, taking in as much of his scent as I could. I looked into his eyes which were the color of warm teak. Matthew's eye's were a coffee brown color. I felt hotter than normal, the air between us almost seemed to shimmer with it.

"He is a kid, he is what he is. He didn't ask for any of this, and I guess I feel sorry for him. He said once he knows about pain and loneliness. I do to, being a wolf has been really difficult for me and I am the only female wolf so I know what it is like to be the only one of your kind." I smiled bitterly. "I hate it; I am more a man than a woman. I am tall, I am too muscular, and I dress like a boy most of the time too. There is nothing feminine about me."

"Oh, I wouldn't say that." he brought his hands up to touch my shoulders. "You are not that tall, not like the others." that was true, I wasn't six foot whatever like the guys. I used to be five foot six but now I am five foot twelve, real close to the six foot mark. I guess girls wolves don't get as tall as the boys, which I thank God for.

"There is nothing wrong with being tall, tall can be beautiful too."

"Most guys are intimidated by tall women," I said.

"Only if they are smaller than the woman," he smiled "as for muscle I think you are well proportioned." he arms began to make small trails up and down my arms, my skin felt so tingly where he touched me. His skin felt like a small breeze, I almost could not feel it except for the pressure he put on them. Hybrid temperatures are almost like ours, just a few degrees less.

"You are a warrior woman, nothing to be ashamed about that. You need no man to come to your rescue, you will save yourself."

He leaned in close, I could see his eyes so well, and I could feel his breath on my lips. You're eyes are so pretty to, the eyelashes make them look so exotic."

Things low in my stomach clenched when he said the word exotic. I remembered the day at the creek when he came out of the water. His hands ringing the water from his hair, water running down his slick chest, and do not even get me started on the loin cloth. Talk about exotic, he looked like an x-rated version of Tarzan.

"You are beautiful Leah, never think otherwise. So what you are a few inches taller than most girls, so what you have some muscle, so what you dress like a boy. Jean shorts and tank tops can look good on a girl; the shorts help show off your legs, the tank tops show off your arms, as well as give a good view of those wonderful breasts."

He kissed me then. His hands moved to my back and he kissed me, I did not fight him. It felt so good. A small part of me was saying _No, this is not right._ But a much larger part was jumping up and down and screaming _Hell yeah! Jack pot!_

He was a good kisser, than again he had a hundred and fifty years to practice. I didn't care though, my body craved this. It had been too long, since before Sam imprinted. I had not been with another since.

I pulled back, my breathing labored. I could feel the blood in my cheeks, his face was flushed, his eyes wild with lust. "Nahuel wait, we can't," I said.

"Why not? I am a man, you are a woman. Let us do what men and women do."

That was an elegant way of saying let's fuck. "This can't work, I am a werewolf, I hunt you're kind, you're a hybrid, part vampire this can't work out. I don't want a relationship."

He smiled and caressed my cheek with his knuckles. "Then there not be a relationship Leah. I know you are attracted to me, I saw you're face that day at the creek."

"You saw?" I asked horrified. Had I been that obvious?

"I saw it, I smelled it," he said.

I froze. "Smelled? You smelled I was aroused?"

"Of course."

"Oh sweet mother of God," I said embarrassed.

He chuckled and I glared at him. "Leah do not be ashamed. I feel quite honored you spotted me when all those other men were there. We hybrids are more beautiful than humans, but we do not reach that level of beauty that other vampires do."

"You are beautiful Nahuel," I said and I meant it.

"You need not stroke my ego Leah, I know I am a feast for many eyes, but I also know that compared to many other vampires I stand little chance."

We began kissing again. He laid me on the ground and took of my shirt, I watched as a dark desire filled his eyes. That desire that men get when all the blood has left their head and made a southern trip. That darkness a man gets when a woman is involved, when a need is about to be satisfied.

I wore no bra, what was the point? He fondled my breasts and kissed them, sending sparks of pleasure up and down my body. "Nahuel wait!" I said.

He looked at me with forced patience. I could feel how ready he was pressed against me, even through his pants I knew he was hard and more than willing.

"I am serious; I am not ready for a relationship. I don't want you to get any ideas after this."

He smiled sensually. "I have no expectations Leah; we are a man and woman who are attracted to one another, nothing more or less. We both have a need we wish to fill. That is what this is, filling a need."

"Okay. Thank you," I said.

"My pleasure," he smirked.

An hour later and we were still in the woods. We were naked and covered in sweat and leaves.

It had been amazing! It was sweet, it was sharp, and it was harsh. There was nothing romantic about it, we were not in love, and we were in lust. This was not love making, this was fucking. Add our stamina, our speed and our durability and you make for an amazing lay.

"Thank you Nahuel," I said trying to catch my breath.

He laughed. "I should be thanking you. I feared you would say no, because of the whole different species thing."

"I had my reservations at first; I was a little worried you would bite me."

"I know better, I know it would have killed you. But that didn't stop you from biting me." he turned his neck and showed me a deep bite mark on his neck.

I remember doing that when I was sitting in his lap, I did not think it was that deep. It was already disappearing. Fading and absorbing into flesh. "I am sorry, I did not want to hurt you."

"Do not apologize, I liked it." he grinned.

We got up and started to search for our clothes. How do they get so far away from us? I was putting on my pants and saw him bending down to pick up his loin cloth, seeing his ass made me smile. I remember grabbing those cheeks and feeling them in my hands and digging my nails into them to push him in deeper.

It is amazing how much better you feel after sex. It must be because o the endorphins, those blessed little chemicals that make you feel pleasure. Suddenly I remembered I was supposed to be home. I thanked God mom hadn't called. Yet. I am sure she will be up, wondering what took me so long.

"Hey Nahuel?"

"Yes?"

"Can you...not tell anyone about this?" I asked.

His smile faded a little, I know he was hurt by my request. "I understand."

"No, I am not ashamed, I am glad we did this, I do not regret it. The thing is the others might take it the wrong way."

"I do not think the Cullens would care about what we do together," he said.

"They won't but certain people in my life might."

Jake was imprinted on a hybrid so he couldn't say anything, Seth was pro-vampire and would not want to know anything about my love life, Quil and Embry might be more 'what were you thinking?' but would mostly just annoy the hell out of me with jokes.

I know mom and Sam would raise holy hell about it, mom for obvious reasons and Sam because despite the fact he is imprinted on my cousin he still acts like he has a right to my body and I know if any of the other wolves find out I will have to deal with a bunch of jokes and snide remarks.

But it doesn't matter what any of them think, I am a woman and I have needs. If I want to sleep with someone no matter who or what they are I will. It's my life and I will do what I want with it.

Nahuel was still looking a little hurt; I walked up to him and kissed him on the cheek. "I loved having sex with you Nahuel, you made me feel like a woman and not some ugly freak. But if the other wolves find out they won't understand. Some will mock and ridicule me for it and I don't want to be spending my days breaking noses because some asshole's can't handle my love life."

He smiled. "I understand Leah. I don't want to cause any trouble in your life."

"Thank you, for the hot sex and for being understanding."

I wrapped my cloths on a string and tied it to my leg. Nahuel was clothed but I was not. I was not feeling self-conscious, not after what we just did. "I will see you tomorrow?" he asked.

"Yeah, I will be there."

I phased and ran off into the woods. I was thankful none of the pack was phased, because if they had been their minds would have been blasted with the images of me and Nahuel together. I chuckled thinking of the dreams it would give them. Serves the bastards right for giving me all those dreams they had.

Another drawback of being a wolf is even in human form our minds seem to bleed into each other's minds. How many dreams did I have of kissing Emily, or Bella or Kim or some girl the guys had a crush on?

Once I got home I phased and put my clothes on, I was going to have to take a shower before bed. Unlike the sex scenes in a book sex is messy. Very messy. I opened the front door. "I'm home," I called.

Mom and Seth came walking in form the living room. I froze. I thought Seth would be in bed. Sleep was a precious thing to a wolf, you never knew when you would get a decent nights sleep. But Seth was still up and he was walking toward me.

"Leah where have you been?" mom asked.

I was not looking at her, I was looking at Seth. I saw his nose twitching and his eyes narrowed. Shit! Fucking enhanced wolf sense of smell! He knew!

"I got talking to the Cullen's, talking about Matthew and what we should do with him. Why are you up Seth?"

"I wanted to know if Matthew was up yet, Jake already told me about his episode and I hoped you might have some news." his face was smooth but his eyes were hard. I know he was pissed right now, I just hope he doesn't go blabbing to mom.

"Well he is still sleeping. Edward said he woke up earlier and went back to sleep," I said.

"Do the Cullen's have any ideas on how to help him?"

"Carlisle has a few, but we want to wait for Matthew to wake up before we try them. It might help us learn more about him and how he became the way he is."

"Cullen's this, Cullen's that you spend way too much time with those people. You should be talking about normal kid stuff," Mom said rubbing her head.

"Were werewolves, there is nothing normal about us," I said. "I am going to bed; I will see you guys tomorrow."

"Alright sweetie, Charlie is coming over tomorrow. You should say hi to him, you haven't seen him in such a while."

I cringed. Luckily I was too far up the stairs for her to see it. I had to make sure I was at the Cullen's before Charlie showed up. Last thing I need to do is force a smile and be friendly with Charlie Swan.

"And get a shower before you go to bed, you're covered in leaves and you even have twigs in your hair. You werewolves, rolling around the ground getting yourselves all dirty."

I took my shower, making sure I got all the leaves and twigs off my body and used extra body wash to get the smell of Nahuel off me. I wonder if the Cullens will know what we did, Edward was a given and the others would probably figure it out to given they have an enhanced sense of smell too.

That was going to be awkward, how was I going to look them in their eyes knowing they knew I slept with Nahuel? It wasn't any of their goddamn business but still I prefer my intimate life to remain private.

I turned off the shower and dried myself off. I put on my bathrobe and walked back to my room. I jumped when I opened the door and Seth was sitting on my bed. "Jesus Seth you almost gave me a heart attack!"

I closed the door so mom would not hear us. Seth just gave me his look, I knew he was upset and he was being patient with me. "You know I keep my door closed for a reason, I don't go wondering in your room scaring the shit out of you...anymore."

"What were you thinking Leah?" he asked.

"You're going to have to be a little bit more specific," I said.

"Oh come on Leah I know you had sex with Nahuel, I can still smell him all over you!"

"Will you keep your fucking voice down!" I hissed. "You want mom finding out?"

He stood up. "Leah!"

"Seth!" I imitated him.

"Why did you do it?"

"Because he is good looking and I haven't been laid since...for a long time. I have needs Seth; believe it or not I can still have a sex life."

He blanched when I said. "But why him Leah? He is a hybrid."

"So, Jake is imprinted on Nessie," I pointed out.

"Yeah, but they are not having sex. Plus you are not imprinted with Nahuel."

"So what? It was just sex nothing more."

"Leah!"

"What?"

"What will the others say when they find out?"

"Who cares, if I want to fuck someone I will. It is my life Seth, not theirs, they have no right to tell me what I am doing is wrong or not."

"But Leah what if you imprint? You don't want to hurt him do you?"

I see what was wrong. Seth thought I was in love with Nahuel. He thought I was setting myself up for another Sam incident. "Seth I don't love Nahuel," I said.

"But you had sex with him."

I sighed. Seth was so innocent. He could not understand that sex could just be sex and not about love. I can't believe I was about to have a birds and the bee's talk with Seth. "Seth sometimes people just want to have sex, no strings attached, no emotional involvement. Just satisfying the bodies needs for pleasure, nothing more, nothing less. That is what this was. Just a man and a woman coming together as a man and a woman should. I don't love him, attracted yes but I am not making plans to settle down with him or some shit."

"How can let a man touch you when you don't even love him?" he asked.

Sweet Jesus. Why me? Why Seth?

"Because I just needed some meaningless sex. There is nothing wrong about it Seth."

We sat in silence for a few moments. Finally Seth spoke. "I just don't want you to get hurt Leah. Nahuel is okay, but he is a little wild for you don't you think?"

I laughed softly. I was touched he cared. He was just worried I was going to get myself with the wrong guy...again.

"I told you, it was just sex, no attachments just some hot, steamy, long, hard, amazing sex that blew my mind and rocked my-"

"Alright enough!" he said covering his ears laughing.

"That's what you get for putting your nose in my business," I said.

He got up and hugged me. "Sorry I freaked Leah, I just don't want you to get hurt again. You are doing so well, I don't want you to go back to where you were."

I hugged him back. "I won't, that Leah is gone baby brother, I promise."

Seth left and I locked the door behind him. I tossed my bathrobe off and went to my bed and turned off the light. Yes I sleep in the nude, with the wolf temperature I now have sleeping with sheets on was pointless. Plus it caused some sweating that made washing the said sheets a nightmare.

I did not go to sleep right away. My thoughts went back to Nahuel. Seven months ago if you told me I would one day sleep with a hybrid I would have beat the hold hell out of you and tossed youe sorry ass over the cliffs. But here I was, basking in the afterglow of an amazing round of sex.

I was honest when I told him I was not interested in a relationship, I was honest when I told Seth it was just sex. I did not love Nahuel, but I did lust after him. He hit my radar. He was hot, he was single, I did not know him (slutty as that sounds) and I did not have to worry about him falling in love with me or sneaking into my room and watching me sleep or some creepy shit like that.

I had been so afraid to have sex. I gave Sam my virginity and a few months later he imprinted on Emily. Sam had been my first and only, I guess another reason for me not finding some moron to sleep with was that I was afraid I would not be able to do it without thinking of Sam.

I had been afraid if I slept with some guy than I would compare him to Sam in every way. In performance, in looks, in style in everything. But I had not thought about Sam, not once in the entire time me and Nahuel had sex. I thought of nothing but the man giving me some amazing sex.

I cannot say he was better than Sam, Sam had been the love of my life, but Nahuel was obviously no stranger to sex. I wonder how he avoided getting some girl pregnant with his kids...how do I know there aren't any little quarter vampires running around out there somewhere?

No, given his views on his own existence I doubt he would put another girl through what his own mother went through. Plus I doubt he would want any more of him running around, not when he thought himself evil.

I did not regret what we did. It was everything I needed and more. Sure he was a hybrid and I was a werewolf. My kind hunted his kind and for all I knew as soon as he went back home he would go back to sucking the blood of some poor human. But as long as he wasn't killing on my turf I don't care.

It had been sweet, it had been rough, it had been sharp. Love is great, wondrous, heavenly. But there are times when you need love and other times when you need lust and as long as you are careful and know what you are getting into lust is all you need.

It was just a reprieve I know. The day would come when I would need love. Hell I need love now, but until then I think a nice serving of lust will do me just fine. Hell maybe I will even hit him up again on a walk in the woods. Add some good memories for those lonely night when I am alone in my bed.

I fell asleep. The last thing in my mind was us in the woods, kissing, licking, caressing, stroking, loving. Him whispering something in a language I did not know in my ear as he came, him making me feel like a woman. Not some ugly manish looking freak.

I fell asleep, satisfied in more ways than one.

 

**Fusedtwilight: Bet you guys did not see that coming? I want too say this now, Leah and Nahuel will not be hooking up. I mean yeah they had sex but they are not going too be romantically involved. I wanted too show that Leah is moving on, plus all she has been through and being in a bunch of horny guys minds all the time she needed some nice loving. So I promise next chapter some major stuff is going too happen. First Matthew remembers more of his past and something really bad will happen to Leah, stay tuned too find out and please review.**


	7. Chapter 7

Focused Madness

Chapter 7

 

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing.**

 

Nahuel P.O.V

I watched as Leah ran off.

She was truly a rare creature. Not just because she was the only female of her kind, she was a rare kind of women. I know she had lost much. I know she had a great love that ended in tragedy and sorrow. I have lived a hundred a fifty years. I have carried with me great pain in those years I know pain when I see it.

But instead of being destroyed by it like most would be she came out of it, stronger than metal.

I sniffed my clothes and grinned. Her smell was all over me. I have had many women in my life; Leah Clearwater was definitely one I would remember for a long time to come.

I ran to the nearest stream I could find. I washed my clothes and myself. Sex can be messy. Good sex is extra messy and we had very good sex. I knew it would be pointless to hide our love making from the Cullens. They would smell the scent of our sex on me when I returned and Edward was sure to find out.

But I respected her desire for privacy and I would do my best to keep it a secret.

Washing in the stream reminded me of that day at the creek. It had been a wonderful day, with my new friends the Cullens and the Denali coven along with my little brother had gone to a creek on a nice sunny day and swam. Esme had brought plenty of food for us hybrids and the wolves.

It had been hard being around the female vampires. Like I told Leah we hybrids were better looking than humans but full blooded vampires were even better looking. Well depending on how good looking they were as humans. The venom could only do so much to make you good looking if you were truly repressive looking as a human.

Seeing all those beautiful vampire women in their bathing suits made my blood hot. But I had to control my thoughts and emotions, least the males tear me limb from limb. Only Leah and Tanya I was free to ogle to my heart's content. Leah may not have the inhuman beauty of a vampire but she was still breathtaking. I can not believe she thinks herself ugly or too manish.

After I washed myself and my clothes I ran to the Cullen's, eager to return to Matthew's side. By the time I had got back the wind had mostly dried my clothes, but I could still faintly smell her on my body. Unless one of the Cullens got real close to me they would not smell her on me either.

I trust Edward being the polite and dignified man he is will not say anything he hears from me.

I made my way into the basement and found Carlisle down checking some of the machines on Matthew. "Is he okay?"

"Fine, just checking his vitals. I am no expert on hybrids but from what I have researched on Nessie he seems to be stable."

"I am glad. I can never thank you or your family enough for what you have done for me Carlisle. First you helped make me see I am not a monster, now you bring me a brother I never thought I would have."

He smiled at me. "You owe us nothing Nahuel. It was sheer luck we found Matthew. I shudder to think what would have happened had he caught Aro's attention."

I remembered Aro. I remembered him and his coven. How they eagerly wished to fight the Cullens and their gathered forces, how despite their dignified and well dressed appearance their eyes betrayed the animalistic nature of a vampire. I remember being told what some of those vampires could do, the thought of Aro using Matthew to make his coven made me ill. As long as I live I will make sure that never happens. No one will ever use Matthew in such a way.

Suddenly the machines began to make more of their beeping sounds. The little colored lines on the monitors began to squiggle more and Matthew's eyes began to move rapidly behind his eyes.

"What is wrong?" I asked.

"I believe he is dreaming," Carlisle said rechecking the machines. "Whatever it is the machines are detecting too much beta waves. I think he is having a nightmare."

"Of what?"

"I don't know."

* * *

 

_Matthew's dream_

_We ran._

_The sounds of fighting was far behind us. A loud explosion made us stop and turn. A giant pillar of flame shot from the ground._

_Rosemary grabbed my hand and we kept on running. Seraphina was in the battle now, she would even things out. But these vampires were more than any nomad. They had great power and were obviously skilled at fighting. My poor siblings fell before them like wheat to the farmer sickle._

" _We have to go back!" I told her. She did not reply. "Father needs us!"_

" _Father sent us away," she said._

" _But they will die if we don't go back!"_

" _Father knows what he is doing!"_

" _But I can help I can make them go away!"_

_We stopped and she turned to me. "Matthew listen, that is not just any coven that is the Volturi, the oldest and most powerful coven in the world. They have powers Matthew and they are experts on killing vampires. If their master learns of you're existence he will not stop until you are his or dead."_

_I looked back to where the fighting was taking place. Pain, fear, pleasure, excitement, thrill, all came from where the fight was happening. It was a battle, a battle I was sure we were losing._

_Rosemary put her hand on my shoulder. "Matthew do you trust me?"_

" _Yes, you are my sister."_

" _Than trust me now, father planned for this for years. He knew Aro might one day come for him, so we made plans. We must go into hiding Matthew to do that I must-"_

_The dream began to fade and lose focus than. The world began to dim and burn. The fire was coming back eating at the dream, keeping me from the truth. I did not try and push forward I dare not. All I could do was pull myself out of the world of dream and back to the world of waking._

* * *

 

Matthew P.O.V

Me wake up now. People surrounding Matthew. Curiosity, worry, compassion. They swirled around me's. Me see Nahuel, Car-Car, Ed-Ed, El-El, Es-Es, but no Leah. Where Leah? Why is he not being here. Me want Leah here.

"Matthew are you okay?" Car-Car asked.

"Me feeling better, head not hurting," me is saying.

Me still looking for Leah, me not seeing her, but me smelling her distantly. She left not too long ago. Funny, her scent on Nahuel. Maybe because they sleep close to Matthew?

"Leah is home Matthew. You have been asleep for some time."

"How longs?"

"Well you fell unconscious at two P.M yesterday and it is eight-fifty now so almost nineteen hours," Car-Car said.

Me not good with numbers. Me not sure how long that is being. Head not hurting, me sit up and Car-Car puts hand on chest to make me not move to quick. "Easy, you just got up from a long nap."

"Are you feeling okay sweetie?" Es-Es asked.

"Can we get you anything?" Car-Car asked.

"Me want Leah," me is saying.

"It is rather early sweetie, we should wait to give her time to rest," Es-Es said.

"Okays, me waits."

"Matthew, do you remember what you dreamed?" Nahuel asked.

"Dreamed?"

"When you were asleep, did you see anything? Anything you do not recall happening recently?" Ed-Ed asked.

Me thinks of the thing me just think off before me wake up. "He remembered something. He was running through a dense forest. There was fight going on, the Volturi invaded their home. He was being led away from the fight by his sister Rosemary."

"The Volturi!" El-El gasped.

"Are you sure?" Car-Car asked.

Worry increase and slight tinge of fear creeps into colors.

"Rosemary? Are you sure?" Nahuel asked.

"Yes. She is your sister correct?" Edward asked.

"Yes. She was one of the four I met when I met father all those years ago," big brother is saying.

"We rans," I say. "The bad vampires come, they bite, they claw, they scratch. Daddy send us away."

"You remember?" big brother ask.

"No...I dream it, I remember it."

"Not all of it though. Rosemary had a plan, a plan your father made in case the Volturi ever showed," Ed-Ed said to big brother Nahuel.

"What was the plan?"

Ed-Ed shrugged. "That was all he remembered."

"So if the Volturi showed up how did he survive?" Car-Car asked.

"That is a good question. Also what happened to Rosemary? Where did she go? Why did she leave Matthew alone and what happened to his memory?" Car-Car asked.

Me just realize Carlisle and Carmen have same first three names. Me need to think new name for them...Carmen be Car-Car, Carlisle be Carl-Carl. That not being so confusing me is thinking.

"Rosemary was very loyal to Joham. I do not think she would have just abandoned Matthew, especially if father ordered her to look after him. She would have given her life to keep him safe," big brother Nahuel said.

"So the question remains, what happened?" Carl-Carl asked.

"Maybe your idea could shed some light on the situation," El-El said.

"If he increased my power I could try and have a look around and see what he has forgotten," Edward said.

"I think we should wait, he just had a traumatic experience and I don't want him to go through any mental probing yet. We shall wait a few days."

"What you talking about?" I ask.

"We will talk more about it later Matthew," Es-Es say, "Let's go get you a nice warm bath and then something to eat."

Me like sounds of that.

* * *

 

Leah P.O.V

"So you and Nahuel huh?" Jake asked.

"Shhh!" I hissed.

We were out in the woods and the hybrids were playing a dame of hide and seek. We were seeking them, while they hid. I had no idea where they were, they were good at hiding. I did not want them to be close enough to hear us.

It was a few days after Matthew woke up and I had been informed of his little memory jog. So far he had no more memories pop up from his boggled brain. We had not discussed Carlisle's idea. We had gone over it with Matthew but he could not truly understand what we hoped to achieve.

Jake knew about Nahuel, Seth let it slip while he was phased. Jake wasn't pissy about it like Seth had been, but he had his concerns.

"There is not Nahuel in me, we had sex nothing more. Plus we have not done anything since then," I said.

"Well that explains why you have been in such a better mood," he laughed.

"Fuck off Black."

"Seriously Leah, you sleeping with a vampire? I would have figured Seth or Embry, but you?"

"I know I have been very anti-vampire before, it just happened. I was horny, he was horny, emotions were running high."

"Look at us. A year ago we would have loved to kill them now here we are either imprinting on them or having sex with them," he said.

"Yeah tell me about it. God if any of the other wolves or my mother found out I would never hear the end of it." I shuddered at the thought.

Suddenly the voices of arguing children filled the air. We rushed to the voices, they were clearly the kids, but what could they be fighting about. We found them with Nahuel, he stood between Nessie and Matthew who were yelling so quickly at one another they sounded like munchkins on on crack.

"What is going on?" I asked.

Nahuel looked relieved to see us. "They are arguing which of you is the better wolf."

That stopped us in our tracks. "What?"

Nessie and Matthew turned to us, their faces flushed from anger and yelling. "We be hiding and Nessie say Jake-Jake soon find us because he best wolf but me say Leah be finding us because she best wolf."

"But I told him Jacob is the best because he is the alpha and he said Leah is the best because she is the only female and she is the quickest because she is quicker than Jake and I said she may be quicker but Jake is stronger," Nessie said.

"It went downhill from there," Nahuel.

"Matthew just can't accept Jake is the better wolf," Nessie said.

"Nessie is being stupid because Leah is clearly a million times better than Jacob."

They glared at one another, Nessie crossed her arms. "You're just upset because you know Jake is the better wolf."

Matthew hissed at her and it was an inhuman sound, the sound you hear from a vampire, not a little boy. Nessie crouched low and hissed back. There were times when they were like any normal child, but there were times like now when their vampire nature reared its ugly head and showed itself.

"Enough!" Jake's voice boomed through the woods. We walked up to them and they glanced at us, anger still in their faces.

"You two are friends, you have no reason to be hissing at one another like this," I said.

"It doesn't matter who is the better wolf, we have nothing to prove and neither do the two of you," Jake said.

"Me and Jake do not care who is the better because it does not matter to us, so why should it matter to you?"

Their faces calmed down.

"Why fight over something so insignificant?"

They looked at one another, their shoulders slumped in shame. "Me sorry Nessie," Matthew said.

"I'm sorry too. Leah is a good wolf too. I just like to say Jake is better because I love him so much," Nessie said. Jake beamed at her.

"Me love Leah much too, me glad she be here for Matthew."

My face fell when he said he loved me. I was taken aback. Love? What does a mad hybrid know of love? I should correct him, I should say something snide, or do something to hurt his feelings. But I do nothing, I just look into his smiling face, unsure what to say or feel. Only the warm glow in my heart telling me on some level...I loved him too.

Eight days later, one month after he showed up in all of our lives Matthew had decided he wanted answers.

It was night time and we all squeezed into the living room, the curtains drawn, the lights dimmed. Everyone was here, Cullen's, Denali coven, me, Jake, Seth. Hell even Embry and Quil were here, they wanted to know about the little punk as well.

He was an enigma after all. How did he survive the Volturi attack? Where did his sister go? What caused him to...lose his grip on reality and talk like Gollum from Lord of the rings?

We were about to find out hopefully.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" I asked him

I held his hand as he laid down on the couch. He smiled at me. "Me sure Leah, me want to know what happened to daddy and others, me want to know past and know where me come from."

I gripped his hand tight. "Okay, but if you feel funny or scared do not hesitate to stop us okay?"

"Silly Leah, you be here, why me be scared?"

I smiled and leaned down and kissed his head. He looked surprised, than his face softened and his eyes glistened with unshed tears.

I stepped back and let Carlisle do his thing. He kneeled down next to Matthew. "Now Matthew, before we start I want you to make Edwards power just a little stronger, okay?"

"Okay."

He looked over at Edward, like he was seeing something we could not. Edward shuddered bad, like someone stepped over his grave. "I'm okay, just a little too quick for me."

"Me sorry Edward," Matthew said.

"It is okay Matthew," Edward said.

"Alright, Jasper if you would," Carlisle said.

Jasper focused on Matthew and his eyes began to drop. Edward stepped closer to Matthew and kneeled right behind his head. The plan was for Jasper to use his power to make Matthew more susceptible to the hypnosis

"Now, close your eyes, but I want you to stay awake. Listen to the sound of my voice, it is you're guide, it will lead you. When I count to three you will be asleep, but you will sill hear me. One...two...three."

Matthew shut his eyes and went still. Carlisle looked to Edward who nodded. "I am trying to read him, I sense something beyond the pain but it is keeping me back."

Carlisle turned back to Matthew. "Now Matthew, can you hear me?" he asked his voice sweet, soothing and relaxing.

"Yes," Matthew said his voice was slack, very monotone like.

"Good. Do you know where you are?"

"Yes, me is being here."

"Good. Now I want you to try and remember the day you and you're family were attacked by the Volturi. What happened?"

Matthew made a face, his eye lids flickered. "We be doing what we usually do, playing, hunting. Daddy was in his study talking to someone."

"Who?"

"Me not know. Some vampires from far away, daddy talking to them about making the world a better place."

"A better place? For who?"

"Everyone. Daddy say he plans to make world better for humans and vampires."

"Do you know what they talked about?"

"No, me not allowed in meeting. Me be playing with sisters. Then sisters come from patrol, say vampires are coming, vampires in black cloaks. Daddy get very afraid, he tell us to prepare for fight. He has some stay behind while rest make a getaway."

What? He had some of his kids stay behind to be slaughtered so he could save his own ass? Son of a bitch. I looked over at Nahuel and saw he did not look happy at all. Anger was clearly in his eyes.

"Then what happened?"

"Some of us run with daddy, others stay behind. Seraphina comes with daddy, she is his favorite. We hear screaming in the distance, they be dying my sisters. They catch up to us the Volturi do, it big fight. Daddy tell Rosemary and me to be running, he tell Rosemary to protect me, that if need be initiate the plan."

"What plan?"

"Me not know."

"Okay so you and Rosemary ran. What happened?"

"As we ran I tried to go back, me wanted to help fight. But Rosemary said no. She told me to trust her."

"What is going on? "Edward asked sounding confused.

"What is it?" Nahuel asked.

"I am slowly getting through the fog. The pain I mean, but there are...holes and gaps. Images that contradict one another. It's like his memory is a puzzle set with pieces missing but also had pieces that don't fit right."

"Keep going son. Matthew, what happened next?"

"Me tell Rosemary me trust her. She say we must go into hiding, daddy knew Volturi come one day so he plan hiding places, he plan new lives for us, for me she say. She say me to important to allow fall to Volturi, she say I must forget to live."

"Forget?"

"Her name is Rosemary, her power is symbolic, just as Seraphina is the burning one Rosemary is the being the forgetting one. She erases memories."

"Of course, it all makes sense!" Edward said.

"She say she will look after me, she say she erase memories and we go in hiding and wait for daddy to come to us. She say it make it easier to hide me that way, to give me new memories to help me blend in better with humans. Me agree, me not happy but me want help daddy. She put hands on head, she get ready to do it...but then...thens me's see's her."

"Who?"

"The little girl in the black cloak with the brown hair and the evil smile."

"Jane!" we all said.

"Me try to shout at Rosemary to warn her but then Rosemary start screaming and grip head so tight it hurt, than me lash out with power."

Matthew began to shake and convulse.

"Matthew what is wrong?"

"The pain! The fire! It burns, it burns us. We wants to die, it hurts so bad!"

Edward began to scream as well, he fell to the ground writhing, Bella ran to him, as did Emmett and Esme. Jasper was on his knees, Alice by his side as was Tanya and Garrett.

"Make it stop! Make it stop! Kill us! Kills me, make it stop!"

He began to thrash around on the couch, he punched little holes in the couch, Nessie began to cry and Carmen grabbed her and took her out of the room. Carlisle Gripped his hands and Eleazar got his legs. "Matthew, wake up now, it is just a memory, just a dream!"

Matthew continued to scream, begging for death. I ran over and gripped his face in my hands. "Matthew! Matthew it's me Leah, calm down, everything will be okay!"

I admit I should have known better. Matthew was screaming like a wild animal. He was too far gone now. I should have remembered he was venomous. I should have reacted quicker. His mouth latched onto my wrist, I cried in pain as his teeth dug into my arm.

His eyes flew open, wild, deadly, but when they looked into my eyes, there was an instant switch. He let go of my arm, blood dribbled his chin. "Leah? He asked confused.

"Leah!" I heard my pack scream.

It seemed like all the noise in the room slowly muted, it seemed like I had one of those 'oh shit!' moments. Time slowed down I stared at my bleeding arm which was now starting to burn like a mother fucker.

I did the only thing I could...I screamed.

* * *

 

I woke up, staring at a white ceiling.

I heard the beeping sound of machines. Was I in a hospital?

A face appeared above mine. Seth. He looked horrible. Like he had not slept well at all.

"Seth?"

"Leah? Oh thank God." Tears began to fall from his face, falling onto mine.

"Where am I?"

"The Cullen's. You have been out for three days."

"What? What...oh God, he bit me!"

"Yeah he did," he said. The look on his face told me nothing good. There was knowledge in his eyes that told me he had more bad news.

"How? How did I survive?"

Vampire venom was poison to us. I should be dead.

"Nahuel saved you, when he saw what Matthew did he instantly rushed over and sucked the venom out of your arm."

"Nahuel?"

"Yes. See when Matthew bit you we freaked. We phased all of us. Edward was being tended to by Bella, he got too deep in his head, he felt what Matthew felt. Jasper was feeling the pain too, it over whelmed him, he could not focus to make things calm. Kate freaked out and tasered Quil and Embry attacked her and Garrett got involved. You should see upstairs, it is still a wreck."

I slowly took it all in. A whole bunch of tubes and wires were connected to my arm, the one bitten by Matthew.

Seth continued. "Jake was trying to calm us down and get to you, but half the vampires were either trying to fight us or tend to you three. Luckily Nahuel got past us and got to you, good thing too, if we had waited longer the venom would have spread too far and killed you, he saved your life."

I sat up a little and Seth helped me. I looked at my arm, I had a nasty bite mark on my arm, the scar tissue had whitened, making it stick out like a sore thumb against my skin. I was going to have to wear something to cover it from now on unless I wanted people to stare.

"Three days?" I asked.

"Yeah, when he bit you, you started to convulse. It was horrible, you're eyes rolled in the back of your head, you started to foam at the mouth." he shuddered.

"What has happened since then?" I asked.

"Well Sam and the others found out."

"Shit," I said softly.

"Yeah, you woke up just in time. There is a bit of a Mexican standoff going on upstairs."

"What?"

"When Sam found out what happened he flipped. I have never seen him so angry, I thought for sure he was going to order his pack to attack the Cullens. They are all upstairs right now."

"They?" my head was still a little foggy, my mind was slowly processing everything.

"Both packs, the elders. Mom has been worried sick. Jake has been doing his best to keep things calm, him and Sam have been thumping their chests at each other these past three days. Sam is trying to butt Jake out of the picture, saying he should be on their side defending his beta and that he is compromised because of his imprint."

"Dick."

"Yeah, Sam had been threatening to kill all the Cullens, the Denali's too, save Nessie if you die."

"When you say he has the whole pack out here you don't mean?"

"The new ones? Yes even them. He brought every wolf he had with him along with the elders. They are going over the treaty and on and on about Matthew and what should be done with him."

"Where is Matthew?"

"Esme and Carmen are trying to console him. These past three days he has been an absolute wreck, he won't speak to anyone, he won't eat, he won't sleep, just keeps crying."

I looked at my now scared arm. I had come dangerously close to death, if I died it would have been war, Sam would have done his best to kill the Cullens if he could. No matter what he would have seen retribution for this. As for Matthew I had to see him. Surprisingly I wasn't mad or angry at him. I mean three days of mental anguish seems punishment enough.

"Get these fucking things off me," I said raising my wire covered arm.

"Leah I don't think that is a good idea, you have been out of it for three days an-"

"Seth we have a major situation going on upstairs, I am Jake's beta and I am the only one who can calm things down. I will rest later right now but we need to get things calmed the fuck down."

The door opened and mom and Carlisle came through. "Leah!" mom shouted. She ran over to me and hugged me and kissed my head. "Oh my baby, I thought I had lost you."

"Mom I am okay, a little tired and hungry but I will live."

"Seth Clearwater what are you doing?" mom hissed at Seth when she saw he had taken some wires off.

"I am getting up mom, I need to go upstairs and get things straightened out."

"You will do no such thing; you will stay here and rest!"

"Mom I have been out like a light for three days, I have rested enough."

Carlisle appeared next to Seth. I could see the worry and the stress in his eyes. I knew he had been worried there would be a fight, I could see how relived he was that I was okay. "Leah I think you should wait a while, Edward has already informed the others you are up."

"Good, than they should expect me to be up there soon." I tried to get up but mom and Carlisle held me in place.

"Leah you almost died!" mom said angrily.

"Yes and now Sam and his are upstairs raising all sorts of hell, I need to be there to show them I am fine and that this was just an accident."

"Accident? A vampire bit you Leah! You could have died!"

"And if Nahuel had not sucked the venom out of me I would be dead. A vampire bit me but another saved my life mom, don't forget that." I looked to Carlisle, my eyes pleading. "Please, after this I swear I will do whatever you say but I have to get up there."

Carlisle sighed. I could tell his rational thoughts were conflicting with his doctor instincts. But in the end his rational side won out. He gently removed the wires and needles from my arm. I noticed that the needle marks weren't healing as quickly as they should.

Carlisle saw my confused look and answered. "You're body is still trying to heal the bite mark. You had a severe allergic reaction to the venom. A few more days and you're healing factor should have fully healed it and you will be back to your old invincible self. "he smiled. "I should tell you there will be a scar."

"Good, maybe it will make me look dangerous and keep people from fucking with me," I said.

They helped me out of bed. My body felt weak. Seth had to help me walk even though Carlisle got me a metal cane to help me walk. We headed upstairs to where everyone was. I could faintly hear the sound of people talking. More like arguing. I could make out the sounds of Jake and Sam. I sighed, let's see. Keep peace between the pack and the vampires, and then go see Matthew. I needed to have a little talk with him.

 

 

**Fusedtwilight: See told you, you didn't see that coming, so what will happen next? How will the meeting go? What will Leah have too say too Mathew? Stay tuned.**


	8. Chapter 8

Focused Madness

Chapter 8

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing.**

 

Leah P.O.V

Walking up the stairs was a pain in the ass but I managed.

The closer we got to the living room the better I could hear the arguing. Jake and Sam were going back and forth. Boys. Always arguing.

Seth helped me walk while Carlisle and mom walked silently behind us. My arm felt very stiff where Matthew had bitten me. The bite mark was still fresh; I could see the teeth marks perfectly.

We walked into the living room and the arguing stopped. The room was a disaster, Seth wasn't kidding, the walls were smashed, and the furniture was all gone as were the tables. They didn't stand a chance in a room full of fighting werewolves and vampires.

Everyone stared at me wordlessly. "What!" I snapped. "You assholes act like you have never seen an injured lady before."

Good way to show I was feeling okay. Act like a mean old bitch.

Many voices cried "Leah!"

Jake and Sam came striding over. Before I could stop the big ape, Jake had wrapped his arms around me and gave me a bone crushing hug. "Jesus girl you scared us to death, should have known the reaper didn't want your ass!" Jake laughed.

"Put me down before I shove this cane up your ass!" I hissed.

He realized how much pain he was causing me; little jolts of pain were running up and down my arm. I wavered and Seth and Jake made sure I was steady on my feet. Sam suddenly took my arm in his. His face darkened in anger and rage. He turned to the others and raised my arm so everyone could see. The jolts of pain returned worse than ever.

"You see! This is why we should stay away from them! This is how they repay us for what we have done for them!"

He spoke to his wolves and the elders. Seth was right, all the new kids were here, and the only ones missing were Brady and Collin. Where were they?

Billy and Old Quil were here. Billy sat in his chair looking grave. Old Quil stood, Quil stood beside his grandfather, I wonder if he was just there to support his grandfather or if he had switched sides. I doubt the ladder. Quil was one of Jake's best friends and would not just switch even over something like this. He was just worried for his granddad.

"Let go of my arm you bloody ass!" I hissed. I snatched my arm away from his and a jolt of pain went through me. My face scrunched in pain and I wanted to howl.

"Leah are you okay?" Sam asked.

I glared at him. "No moron, I have a mangled arm and here you are waving it around!"

Sam looked ashamed. "Sorry, I did not think-"

"No shit. You did not think, you did not think bringing the elders and the new kids here was a bad idea? The elders? My mom, Billy? Old Quil? What the fuck Sam?"

"Leah we have been trying to keep peace between Sam's pack and Jake's, we do not want another incident like the one last year," Billy said.

Jake and Seth helped me move into the living room, Embry smiled at me, he was glad I was alive. I smiled back. We stood with the Cullens and once we were altogether Quil came over to join us. His grandfather watched as his grandson came to stand with us, he did not look happy.

I was glad Quil was with us, it made me feel better. Better about our pack. That despite what had happened we still stuck together. Sam had joined his wolves and the elders. Mom was with him.

"Well here I am. I am not dead, crisis averted."

"How can you be so casual about this Leah? You almost died," Sam said.

"What would you have me do Sam? Scream? Yell?" I asked.

"It's what you would have done in the old days," he said.

"That was the old Leah Sam. I have done a lot of changing, for the better I think. I am not too thrilled about almost dying, but what happened was an accident. No one was meant to be bit, especially me."

"We know," Old Quil said, "the Cullens as well as Jacob have explained to us about this little experiment you attempted to help the creature regain his memories."

I felt a hot streak of anger when he called Matthew creature. "His name is Matthew, it's rather rude to call someone a creature don't you think?"

Old Quil's eyebrows shot up. Plenty other wolves were giving me the wide eye as well. You never talk back to old Quil, not unless you want his cane being tapped on your head.

"For as far as I know yes our experiment was successful. But it caused Matthew to remember the pain that was inflicted on him as well and I grabbed his face to help calm him down when he bit me." I looked over at Nahuel and smiled. "Had Nahuel not sucked the venom out during the chaos that transpired I would be dead."

Nahuel smiled. A growling sound made me turn to Sam, his teeth were bared. "Of course, why would he want his new mate to die?"

The air was silent. Deadly silent. Looks of shock and outrage crossed the faces of the elders and the wolves. I brought my cane up and brought it down on Jake and Seth's backsides hard as I could. I may have dented my cane but seeing them rub their bottoms brought a savage satisfaction to me.

"Sons of bitches!" I snarled.

"It was all Seth, not me!" Jake howled.

I rounded on Seth, murderous intent in my eyes. He paled and stepped back. "Sorry Leah I accidentally let it slip when I was phased. I saw Nahuel sucking the venom out and I thought he was doing it because he loved you and Quil and Embry asked me why I would think that and they saw the memory I had of that night and when Sam was over here Quil accidentally made a little remark about you thanking Nahuel with some nice sex for saving your life."

I rounded on Quil but he and Embry had stepped far out of my reach. They cowered in my wrath, I was so angry, I wanted to phase. Instead I closed my eyes and counted until I began to calm, when I reached fifty I opened my eyes. Mom looked mortified.

"Leah?" she asked. "Tell me it's not true? Tell me you did not let that thing have his way with you?"

I groaned. I so did not want to discuss this now with everyone present. "Yes, I did sleep with Naheul once."

The room was filled with outraged cries from the wolves and elders. I glanced over at Nahuel, he was looking sheepish as Garrett and Emmett were nudging his shoulders and whispering stuff in his ears too low for me to hear. Judging from the blush creeping up on his cheeks I had a good idea what they were saying.

"Wow Leah, I always knew you were a freak but I didn't think you would fuck another freak," Paul said.

Seth growled and took two steps toward Paul. I grabbed his shoulder. "Don't," I whispered

I stared at Paul. "What I and Nahuel did is none of your business. Any of you. What I do with my life concerns no one but me, myself and I."

"How could you let him touch you?" Sam asked. Hurt and betrayal in his eyes. "A vampire Leah? A fucking vampire? After everything they have done to us, after all the pain they caused us you go and fuck a vampire?"

"Like I just said Sam, what I do with my life concerns no one but me. I did not plan for it to happen, it just did, I will spare you the details but I will say this. I do not regret this."

"Are you in love with him? Did you imprint on him?" mom asked.

Damn it mom, just drop it. "No, I do not love him nor did I imprint on him."

"Then why!" she asked her voice raising a few octaves.

"Because I wanted it, because I needed it, because I needed comfort only a man could give a woman mom," I said.

"Slut," Paul murmured.

"Shut up Paul! Speak when spoken to!" Sam yelled at him.

Paul's body shuddered; I knew Sam just used his alpha voice because I felt it. I may not be in his pack but I still knew when he used his power. But to me it fell on my mind like gossamer. But for Paul and any other wolf in Sam's pack it would be like steel chains weighing you down.

Sam turned to Jake. "This just proves it, the corruption of your imprint is spreading to your pack, the Leah I know would have never done something so disgusting."

"And what makes you such a fucking expert on who I am Sam?" I growled.

"The Leah I know would never lower herself to sleep with someone with even a hint of vampire blood in the..."

"Fuck you Sam you don't know a fucking thing about me. You know the best part about it? I didn't think of you a single time, it's you're fucking fault I never want to date anyone! I am still to fucking hung up on you that I am afraid if I sleep with a man I will keep on comparing him to you!"

"Leah, maybe now isn't the best time to say this," mom said.

"No, he started this I will finish it! He made me feel like a woman Sam, not a freak. Is that so bad? That since I became a wolf I can feel beautiful? Attractive?"

I was on a roll now, Sam had the balls to bring my laundry out in front of the packs, the Cullens, the elders, my friends, my family and...]Whatever the vampires were to me. I mean I wasn't too friendly with them but I didn't hate them as bad as I used to.

I smiled at him but it was not friendly, it was mean, nasty, and full of wrath and bitterness, a smile many in this room were all too familiar with. I had been a bit wrong when I said the old Leah was gone, she still lived in me, still thrived in the part of my heart scared by life and love.

"Or maybe you are just jealous I moved on? Does it irritate you I no longer pine for you? Does the fact I can find happiness with another man make your blood boil?"

"Leah Clearwater that is enough! Sam has been worried about you these last three days, everything he has done is to protect you and keep you safe even though you are no longer in his pack but you still treat him with disrespect," mom said.

"He airs my dirty laundry in front of everyone and you think I should respect him for that?" I demanded.

"Enough!" Billy roared.

We all shut our yaps. Billy may not be an alpha wolf but he has an air of authority that when he tells you to do something you shut up and you do. Amazing considering he is in a wheel chair and all.

"We are not here to discuss Leah's sex life, no matter how much it offends us. We are here because one of our wolves nearly died after being bitten by a hybrid. Now I want to know what makes this kid so special for you to risk our wolves lives Carlisle. I know you are all hiding something about this boy, he is more than just some hybrid you found wondering the streets."

Damn. Billy was so fucking smart, how the hell did he figure out we hadn't told them the full details of Matthew's power. God if we tell them now heads really will fucking roll.

I looked at Jake. He had the same knowing look in his eyes. This was about to get really ugly.

"Tell them Carlisle, everything," I said.

"Very well. Billy you are right, we have been keeping certain details about Matthew from you and your tribe."

He told them about Matthew's power, what he could do, how he could see and manipulate emotions and how he could make a vampire's powers stronger twelve times what it was. We told them what we had learned from probing his mind.

The room was quiet but you could feel the tension in the air. "Twelve times stronger?" Old Quil gasped.

"My god! What would happen if the Volturi got their hands on him, they could crush us," mom said.

"Which is why we wanted to keep this as private as we could. The fewer who knew the better," Carlisle said.

Sam glared at me and Jake. "And you all kept this from us?"

"Just me and Leah," Jake said, "Seth and the others were unaware of the true extent of Matthew's power."

"Why didn't you tell us Jake? This is too big a thing to be kept from us," Billy said.

"Well after what happened last year we didn't want another incident, after all," I said imitating his words from earlier.

"Besides the more people that know the chances increase that Aro or the Volturi will find him," Jake said.

"They already know about him. How do we know that they are not here already?" mom asked.

"If they were aware of his existence they would have come a long time ago. Alice has had no visions of the Volturi gearing up to come here again so they must not know he is here, they must think he is dead."

"What of his father? This Joham? What if he comes here for him?" Old Quil asked.

"I cannot see Joham, Matthew remembers him fighting the Volturi while he and his sister stayed behind to fight. I should have seen him by now but I can't so he must be dead," Alice said.

"It would be advantageous for us to have the boy, if we can get him to better control his power than the next time the Volturi come it would be easy for us to win," Eleazar said, "we have already seen what he can do for those in our covens who have abilities, imagine what he can do for the others, like Zafrinia, or Benjamin."

"Doesn't matter who has him on their side, the fact is vampires will be controlling him," Sam said.

"Oh for god's sake Sam why would the Cullens ever use him against us? After everything we have been through with them why would they turn on us?" I asked.

"Have you forgotten they cannot be trusted Leah? Or is that scar on your arm not proof enough of that."

I threw my hand up in the air, giving up. "I am not going to waste my time trying to make you see sense Sam." I turned and went to leave the room, Seth helped me move.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"To find Matthew."

I heard Sam move; he came to stand in front of me, blocking my path. "No! I forbid it; he tried to kill you Leah!"

"He was not in his right mind, I should have known better than to but my hands or arms near him when he was like that. Now get out of my way."

He did not budge.

"Sam I swear to god if you do not move I will move you myself," I said quietly but I knew he could hear me.

We stared at one another for a moment and I thought I was going to have to move him. Then he moved to the side and let me past. "Thank you," I said.

"Matthew is in our cabin," I heard Edward call out.

Jake stayed behind to continue his talk with Sam and the elders. I hated to leave him but there was nothing I could do since my opinion didn't seem to count for much. Besides Matthew needed to see I was okay. I can only imagine the pain the little guy must be feeling right not.

Seth took me out to Edward and Bella's cabin. I found out where Collin and Brady were. They sat by the cabin. They had their heads down on their paws but when they saw us their heads jerked up in surprise. They got up and yipped at us. Their little tales wagged and their tongues rolled out of their mouths, they were happy to see I was okay.

"Hey guys," I smiled when I saw how they reacted to me. "What are you doing out here?"

"Sam ordered them to keep watch over Matthew, make sure the Cullens didn't try and sneak him out," Seth said.

I sighed. I went up to the door, before I could knock the door opened. Esme opened it, looking radiant as usual; her face had a huge smile on it. "Oh Leah, I am so happy you are okay!"

She hugged me gently; I couldn't really hug her back. My one hand was useless and the other one was on the cane. "Thanks Esme," I said.

"Come in, Carmen is with Matthew, we have tried our best to get him to speak or it but he won't. Poor thing hasn't even had a bath. He is totally unresponsive."

She let us inside and closed the door. "I was making something for Collin and Brady when you two arrived," she said.

I saw a few sandwiches on the kitchen counter. Good old Esme, still motherly even when her family is being threatened. Don't let her fool you; I saw her fight in the battle with the newborns I know what she is capable of when provoked.

"Where is he?"

"In Nessie's room. She is over at Charlie's, we figured it best for her to be there do to all the stress going on," she said.

Good thinking.

"Can I make you anything? I know you must be famished."

My stomach growled in response. Three days of nothing but I.V food can make one hungry. I quickly ate three sandwiches and drank a glass of milk. I had Seth escort me to Nessie's room. Esme accompanied us, she opened the door for me and I stepped through.

Nessie's room was perfect, everything was well made and expensive looking. She had a four poster bed (fit for a princess) which was a bit big for her but I am sure in a year or two she will fit into it better. One common theme in the room was all the wolf dolls the littered the shelves. Pictures of her family littered the walls. I noticed some pictures of some of the vampires from last year in some of them. Carmen sat in Nessie's bed, humming a lullaby and gently stroking Matthew's head, his back was turned to us so I could not see what he was doing. I didn't know if he was asleep or awake.

Carmen smiled when she saw me; she kissed his head and got up. Seth led me over to the bed and Esme and Carmen stood by. Just in case. I kneeled down by the bed and Seth backed up, giving us some room.

"Matthew?"

No response. Was he asleep?

"Matthew I'm okay."

Still no response.

I used my uninjured hand to reach out and and touch his hair. It was soft like silk, it feel between my fingers like clouds.

"Matthew look at me."

He still was not moving, I was getting a little ticked. A little remorse would be nice after all.

"Matthew look at me now," I said adding firmness to my voice.

He did not move at first, than he rolled over to face me. He looked horrible, his eyes were red and blood shot. I know he had been crying a lot for his eyes to get like that. I also wondered if he had slept much. Hybrids didn't need to sleep, it was optional for them. But if they wore themselves out mentally or physically they could fall unconscious.

"Matthew, I am not mad at you," I said, "I know you didn't mean to do it. It was just an accident that is all."

He began to cry then, I dropped my cane and with my good hand wrapped it around his neck and pulled him close to me, and I hugged him and let him cry into my shoulder. His body shook with sobs.

"Shhh, it's okay," I said as I cradled him.

"M-me so-sor-sorry Leah," he sobbed, "Me was i-in suc-ch pain and…"

"I know, I know. I am okay though."

"Me thought me's k-k-k-killeds yous."

He wrapped his arms around me in a tight hug. "Me loves you Leah, me nevers do anythings to hurted you."

"I know Matthew, I love you too." the words left my mouth before I even realized I was going to say them. Matthew pulled back to look at me, tears flew down his eyes and his lip was quivering. "Really?"

I smiled at him. "Really."

He hugged me then and began to cry harder. It was part pain part joy. Joy that I loved him, pain that he had hurt me and I still loved him. He began to fall limp in my arms as I rocked him back and forth, I gently sang him one of the ancient Quileute songs mom and dad used to sing to me when I was a girl. I gently laid him in the bed and pulled the covers over him. He peeked at me through half closed lids. He saw my injured arm and blanched.

"Does it hurted Leah?"

"A little. There will be a scar though," I answered.

I smoothed the hair out from his head, I continued to softly sing to him and soon his eyes closed and his breathing evened out. "Leah...me...love...you."

I kissed his forehead. "I love you too," I whispered.

After I made sure I tucked him in Seth led me back to Edward and Bella's living room. I was exhausted. My arm was having these little jolts of pain every time I moved. "That is good," Esme said, "it means there is no nerve damage."

I was tired. So tired. It had been one hell of a day for me and I had been up for no more than an hour. I had to lay down, Seth made room so I could lay my head down on his lap, he got a pillow from the couch and gave it to me to use.

I lay down and tried to rest, I could feel Seth running his hand over my hair, he began to sing to me, the same songs mom and dad did the same songs I just sang to Matthew to help him sleep. His voice reminded me of dad's. Some small part of me I thought I had given up recognized that voice, remembered those songs.

Laying down on the couch with my head on Seth's lap and him humming those songs made me remember dad and all the times I fell asleep to him gently singing to me. Despite the stress going on between the packs and the Cullen's now, despite what had happened and my near fatal brush with death I felt at peace.

I fell to sleep, Seth's voice helping me get there quicker. I felt safe and secure, I was with my blood, my family, how could I not.

* * *

 

_Leah's dream_

_I dreamed me and Matthew were somewhere out in the middle of a field._

_Lavender flowers grew everywhere; their sweet scent filled the air. We were having a picnic, we sat on a blanket and we had a picnic basket with us. The sun shined bright on us, causing Matthew's skin to glow softly._

_I was in a white dress and wore white shoes. I looked like I was getting ready to go to Sunday church. I watched as Matthew reached into the basket and pulled out a fried chicken leg. He smiled at me and I smiled back. "Eat up, you want to grow up to be big and strong," I told him._

_He nodded and chomped down on the chicken leg. Blood began to ooze out from it and he continued to eat it. Soon the chicken leg was a bloody mess and his mouth was smeared with blood. "That was goods, Leah, can I have mores?" he asked._

" _Of course you can," I said._

_He eagerly reached in and pulled out another fried chicken leg, just like before blood oozed out making a disgusting mess. I said nothing about the strangeness of it. It was in his nature after all._

_He wiped his mouth with a napkin and got up he ran out in the field and began to run and dance. Butterflies appeared from the air and danced above him. I smiled, pleased._

_Then I saw him. Dad. He stood on the edge of the trees, his face grim._

" _Dad?" I said. I stood up, Matthew had not noticed him. He was trying to catch the butterflies. "Daddy!" I called._

_He looked at me and spoke. "A storm is coming baby. Choices will have to be made, difficult choices. Just know I am always with you and I love you."_

_He backed up into the woods, disappearing in the shadows. "Daddy wait, come back!" I called._

_Then dark clouds appeared blocking the sun, I could hear the thunder and see the lightning flash, the air dropped a few degrees and the wind picked up. Matthew continued to dance unaware of the world around him. The loss of sunlight caused the surrounding trees to darken. Then from the darkness of the woods a figure emerged._

_It was Sam._

" _Sam?" I said._

_He looked at me, a firm and determined look on his face. I had seen that look many times. When I was in his pack and I watched him go alpha and make a choice that was hard and difficult to make._

" _Sam," I called to him but he did not reply._

_Then from the darkness of the woods, they came. Wolves. His pack, all of them, Jared, Paul, Collin, Brady, even the new kids, all in wolf form. What were they doing?_

_They all growled and flashed teeth, the hackles of their fur stood up. They were getting ready to kill and they were all looking at Matthew who was still dancing, the butterflies having long fluttered away._

_I tried to run to him, to grab him and run away. I knew they were here for him; they were going to kill him. I had to get him away, far away or he would die. But no matter how hard I ran, I could not seem to reach him. I felt my feet moving me but it was like the space between us kept on getting longer and longer so I could not get to him._

" _Matthew! Run! Run!" I screamed at him._

_He did not hear me and continued to dance. The wolves and Sam began to advance on him. "Sam don't do it!" I yelled._

_Sam looked at me and his eyes softened just a little. "I am sorry Leah, but it is for the best."_

_I tried phasing, but for some reason I could not. It was like some force kept me from doing it._

_Sam phased, transforming into a dark nightmare. He led the others as they continued to advance on Matthew. He spotted to and stopped dancing, his back was to me and I could not see his reaction. He turned around and I expected to see a look of pure horror on his face. I was shocked when I saw he was smiling, playful still in the face of death._

" _It's okay Leah, their just teaching me how to die."_

_They pounced on him them, tearing at him with their jaws and tearing chunks off. I watched in horror as Sam, Jared, Paul, Collin and Brady tore him to pieces, tossing bits and pieces up in the air. Then the new wolves fought over those bits and tore them into smaller pieces. Soon the field was covered in blood and gore their muzzles drenched in blood._

_Nahuel came running from the trees, he saw the scene before him and howled in pain. He glared at me his eyes full of hate and pain and tears. "You were supposed to protect him! Why didn't you protect him!"_

_That was when I woke up._

* * *

 

My eyes flew open and I looked around, Seth was nowhere to be seen.

I was still on the couch with a pillow beneath my head. My arm was throbbing in pain. I touched it and winced. Fuck that hurt.

I heard the heart beat of a fast beating heart. I looked over to the side and saw Matthew was sleeping on the floor next to the couch a pillow under his head and a blanket covering him. He must have gotten up and came to sleep next to me.

I saw a bottle of pills and a glass of water with ice in it on the table. A note was next to the pills. I picked it up, it was well written.

' _Leah, these are some strong pain pills that will help with the pain in your arm. Sam and the elders have left. We will tell you more tomorrow after you have slept, we must talk- Carlisle'_

I grabbed the pill bottle and popped a few pills and drank some water. I was quiet, careful not to wake Matthew. I laid back on my pillow, soon the pills took effect and I was once again in dream land, and this time I had no dreams.

 

**Fusedtwilight: Well now Leah has a new kick-ass scar on her arm and has some more issues with Sam. What does Carlisle have to talk with Leah about? And will this be the last incident with Matthew? Please review.**


	9. Chapter 9

Focused Madness

Chapter 9

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki.**

**Now last chapter we a roller coaster for everyone, Leah almost gets killed, Sam almost starts a war, poor Matthew is paralyzed with guilt. You would think it can't get worse than that right?**

**Wrong.**

 

Leah P.O.V

I sat in the Cullen's living room.

Jake and Carlisle filled me in on what happened after I left. They had gone over Matthew and what we learned about his past. Luckily no punishment was found necessary but Jake did not seem happy.

"They are really nervous about him Leah, his power, his mental being, they do not think it bodes well and they fear what would happen if any vampire with a power got their hands on him," he said.

I did not like that, I kept on thinking about the dream I had and what it meant. Hopefully it was just a dream. Hopefully.

"Maybe we should send him away. With The Denali coven so Eleazar could study his power more, or with Nahuel and his aunt," I suggested.

A part of me felt a little depressed when I suggested that. It would mean I would not be able to see him as much. I mentally shook my head, I had only known him little more than a month, it wasn't like we were best buds, he would be happier with Nahuel or the Denali coven to.

"We have considered that option. I think that do to recent events moving him now would cause more damage. He has been through much trauma these last few days. Plus he has already formed strong bonds with us; I fear separating him from us would do more harm than good. We should wait a little longer, wait for things to cool down and for him to get to know Eleazar and his coven more, it will help make the separation less painful," Carlisle said.

"What about his memories?" I asked.

"Since three days ago he has had no more flashbacks or episodes. All we can do now is hope that given time they will return on their own. From what we have gathered right when Rosemary began to wipe his memories Jane showed up and used her power. Now this is where we start to guess, but we think she either used her power on Matthew or Rosemary, Matthew subconsciously lashed out at Jane and accidentally caused her power to grow stronger which explains why the pain was so great it blocked out the majority of his memories. I also suspect that in the fight Rosemary may have accidentally wiped out more than she meant to and it was a continuous circle. Rosemary wiped his memory and it was replaced with the pain of Jane's power. It's a wonder his mind wasn't fully broken."

"Then how did he get away from Jane and Rosemary?" I asked.

He shrugged his shoulders.

"We will probably never know, maybe one day we will find out, but for now we should just help him recover. We'll face his past when the time comes."

He gave me a quick check over after giving me some pills to help with the pain he sent me home. I saw Matthew before I left and gave him a hug and promised to come back when I was better. I saw Nahuel real quick to thank him.

"It is no problem Leah, I owe you so much. It was the least I could do," he said.

"Yeah well sorry Sam had to go and drag you into our personal shit."

"He really was angry we slept together."

"That's because once a long time ago he and I were an item."

"Item?"

"We were together."

"Oh...I see. Sorry."

"Don't be, you did nothing wrong, neither did I. Sam had no right to be pissed about, he should have been grateful to you for saving me." I leaned forward and pecked him on the cheek. "Thanks for saving my life," I said.

He touched the cheek where I kissed him. "Anything for a lady."

* * *

 

After that Jake drove me home. I was off patrol duty until I fully healed, fine by me, more time for me to rest and relax. Carlisle gave me some pills in case the pain got to be too much, he told me I was going to have to do some physical therapy for a while until my arm fully healed. If I did not give it a good work out the muscles could heal wrong and it would useless more or less.

The pills were strong enough to send a human into a coma, but for me they just numbed the pain. I had to wonder how Carlisle gets away with sneaking all these drugs away from the hospital.

I took it easy for the next couple of days, if the pain in my arm got to be too much I took some pills. Seth helped me with the physical therapy. Helping me lift weights, forming a fist around the ball, stuff like that.

Mom was still pissed with me, she just could not understand how I could sleep with Nahuel, even if he was only half vampire he was still part vampire and she just could not accept that. Fine by me, I cannot understand how she can go out with dad's best friend when he hadn't even been dead for a year, guess were even now.

Emily came to visit me while I was recovering. She brought me muffins. We talked for a while. She asked about Nahuel and if it was true. I was amazed at how quickly Sam had told her, I was sure if Emily knew than I was sure the other imprints I knew. I can only imagine how much scandal I have caused.

She didn't get mad or judgmental like the others did. She understood. In a way she was happy for me. I was moving on, I was letting go of Sam. She was not thrilled by my choice of bed partners but she accepted my choice and moved on, glad someone could.

Sam had not been to see me, I was thankful for that. I was not in the mood to have another soul searching talk with him. Plus I had nothing to say, he had embarrassed me and aired my private life in front of everyone. You don't do that to people, period.

Eight days after I left the Cullen's I stopped taking the pills. The pain was fading even though the scar remained. I was on my way to visit Jake. I was bored around the house and decided to pay him a visit. Mom wasn't talking to me much; still disappointed I fucked a hybrid, oh well.

I walked up to the Black's door and knocked. Rachel answered the door, a frown formed on her face and her eyes narrowed. I could hear Paul inside eating, talking to Jake.

"Leah," she said, not sounding too thrilled to see me.

"Hey is Jake here?"

"Maybe," she said. Her arms were crossed and she had a cold look on her face. Sheesh, some is on the rag.

"Well if he is could you let him know I am here," I said.

"Why? Is this pack business? We're having family time so if you could maybe come back later."

She went to close the door but I stuck my foot in keeping it open. "Jake!" I called.

"What are you doing? Get your foot out of the door!" she hissed.

"What's going on?" Jake asked appearing at the door.

He looked grateful to see me. I knew he was not in the mood to hang out with Paul, who was Rachel kidding? Family time? Paul only cared about her, I doubt Jake wanted to see Paul be all lovey dovy with his sister.

"Hey, I'm bored, want to hang out?" I asked.

"No, we are having a nice afternoon as a family as I told you," Rachel said.

"Easy Rach, I will be back soon," Jake said easing his way out the door.

"Why does she have to come here? Why doesn't she go to her leech lover and bother him for a while?"

I growled low in my throat. Paul appeared behind Rachel, his face set in a scowl and glaring at me for being mean to his precious imprint. Fuck him and her! She wants to be a bitch she'll find I am the queen of being a bitch!

"Come on Leah," Jake said grabbing my uninjured hand. I followed him and ignored the sound of a slamming door. I could hear her muttering about me and I fought the urge to go back and send her back to college in a full body cast, but I don't think Jake would like me hurting his sister, no matter how much she deserves it.

We walked out into his garage. It was littered with parts and tools. We sat down on the couch he had put inside for guests. He grabbed be a soda from the small cooler he had in here and we sat down.

"Thanks for saving me," he said.

"My pleasure," I smiled.

"Sorry about Rachel. It's funny; she never had anything against the Cullen's. She thought the stories were all a bunch of croc. Than Paul imprints on her and she knows the truth and suddenly she hates them with a passion."

"Once was a time we hated them as well," I said.

"You said we?"

"Yes I admit it, I don't hate them...but I am not going to be buddies with them either," I said.

I took a sip of my soda. It began to gently rain outside. A common occurrence here.

"Seen Sam lately," he asked.

"If I did you would know I am sure," I said. "I did talk to Emily though; glad to see someone isn't judging me for it."

He took a sip from his soda, I could tell from the look on his face he was carefully considering his next words. "I don't have a problem with it, but I do question the wisdom of it."

"Fuck you, what I can't be imprinted to a guy to screw him?" I asked giving him a glare.

He held up his hands. "No, it's just...well I don't want you getting attached to him Leah. You guys are from very different walks of life. Don't forget he still eats people."

"Yes, I know. But as I have been telling everyone I am not falling for him, it was just a one night stand."

"I just don't want to see you get hurt Leah," he said.

"Too late for that," I said.

I showed him my arm. The bite mark where Matthew had bit me was white and shiny now. It was a few degrees cooler than my body; it almost felt like normal human skin. Jake traced the outline with his finger.

"That was really close Leah, sorry I didn't help you, and I was busy trying to get Embry and Quil under control. When Matthew bit you they flipped and phased. I didn't want them to attack one of the Cullen's; things would have gotten much worse."

"I know, Seth told me."

"So you feeling better enough to start patrolling again?" he asked.

I sighed. "Better? Sure. Willing?"

He laughed. "Listen Alice has reported a thunderstorm coming in a few days, the vampires are going to play some ball, want to join?"

"Vampires? Ball?"

"Yeah baseball. Because of their strength they need to wait for thunder so they can disguise the sound of them hitting the ball. I figured we could all go, blow some steam off after this month."

"Sounds cool, count me in," I said.

He smiled "You're going to have the time of your life Leah I swear."

* * *

 

I was going to fucking kill Jacob fucking Black!

He is the dumbest, the stupidest, most idiotic motherfucker to come out of La Push since...the last stupid asshole!

Why am I so pissed at that retard? Well remember when he said he figured we could use the break? Well apparently when he meant we he failed to tell me that meant Sam and his pack as well.

Yes, that is right. Imagine my surprise when Jake drives me, Seth, Embry and Quil out to the field where we were supposed to meet the vampires and saw there were more cars than there should have been, very disturbingly familiar cars.

We got out and found Sam and his pack waiting for us. The second I saw them I rounded on Jake, my face flushed with anger.

"Now Leah don't be mad," he said.

I brought the metal bat under his chin and pressed it tight against him. I turned to Quil, Embry and Seth who wisely stepped aside. "Did any of you know about this" I asked.

They shook their heads. I turned to Jake. "What the hell is this?"

"It's to help better werewolf, vampire relations. I figured if they saw how ordinary and family like the Cullen's were they would see they really are different from the others of their kind."

"Leah!" a female voice called.

My head shot to the side so quick it was like a bullet. There waving at us was Emily, along with Kim and Rachel. I glared at Jake who smiled nervously. "Well when the girls found out they wanted to come to. Jared, Paul and Sam tried to say no but you know what happens when an imprint wants something they get it."

"Leah!" another voice called.

I craned my head and saw Nahuel waving at us. He was dressed in full baseball gear, he even wore a cap. He looked like a sexy Spanish baseball player. I saw Sam glower at him from across the field. I glared at Jake who smiled nervously at me. "After this you and I are going to have a nice long talk."

I pulled the bat back and went walking over to the Cullens. I heard Jake sigh in relief. I fought the urge to hit his balls and get a home run right then and there. Nahuel came up to meet me looking sex as fuck; those pants clung to him perfectly, showing off his curves and muscles just right.

"Glad you could make it," he said.

"Thanks. Where is Matthew?" I asked.

"Edward and Bella are bringing him and Nessie here right now. They had to get baths and get dressed. How is your arm? Will you be able to play?"

"Yeah, I just won't be able to work it too hard," I said.

Thunder roared over head, he smiled at me. "Well time to play, don't think just because I slept with you I will go easy on you. Arm or no arm."

"Funny, that seems to be the only way you know how to play, easy," I smirked baiting him

I walked away and joined the others. Werewolves versus Vampires in a game of baseball. Place your bets.

I didn't play at first; I sat at the sides with some of the others and watched them play. Jake and Sam shared the captain spot for our team since they could not choose just one of them to lead. Alice was pitching, Emmett was the catcher and Quil was bating first.

All us wolves wolf howled and the imprints cheered. I sat next to Emily on the back of Sam's truck. Alice tossed the ball and Quil hit it. We yelled for him to run and he ran, but Edward who was out in the field disappeared in a flash and tossed the ball to Tanya who caught right when Quil slid to first base. "Out!" Esme called.

We awed and boo'd and Quil came over to us, a small frown on his face. "I think that vamp grabbed my ass," he said.

Tanya was watching Quil with a small smirk. Paul went next, he made it past first and got to second, I noticed as he passed Tanya's hands seemed to flash near his buttocks. He glared at her as he ran, shock clear on his face. I saw Rachel bristle when she figured out what happened.

"Tanya!" Kate yelled, "stop grabbing their asses! This is a game, not a date."

Tanya raised her hands in the air as if to say "I didn't do nothing."

She had been a succubus for thousands of years and according to her, she was the origin of the story. You don't be a whore for thousands of years then just stop.

We played for a while, sadly the vamps were wining. We were better at anything than humans but in our human form we could only tap into a fraction of our true potential we had as wolves. Somehow I don't see us turning into wolves and using our jaws to grip the bats as a fun way to play.

Edward's Volvo drove up in the distance. I went to go greet them. Bella was all psyched to play, last time she had been to a Cullen family game she had been human, now she was a vampire and ready to kick some ass. Matthew and Nessie jumped out of the back, they were so excited they were buzzing. Literally. They moved so quick and talked so fast like a couple of kids and Disney Park talking about all the fun they were going to have.

Too bad none of us knew what a nightmare it was going to turn into.

* * *

 

Matthew P.O.V

I really excited to play!

I not knowing what baseball is being but Nessie tell me. You use a big stick and hit a ball hard as you can so people chase after it, then you try and take over their territory and run circles before they throw ball to guardian of small land and make you out.

Leah walk over to be meeting us. Me happy to see she okay. Matthew hate himself when he bite Leah. Matthew is not meaning to. Matthew did not know he even bite her until blood touch tongue. Than it like 'pop' Matthew awake and confused why Leah arm is being in mouth.

Then she begin scream, pain brightened her aura. Pain is monochromatic colors flying of body like static from T.V.

Matthew not eat or sleep for while, Es-Es and Car-Car try and make Matthew feel better, but I was not feeling better. Then people show up and they be really angry with mes, they be angry at Cullen's and Denali's to. Me thinking they going to hurt us, but Leah wake up and make things better.

Me sad when me see scar on her arm, me feel great shame every time me see it, it reminder of what I do, it forever mark my shame. But me not think sad thoughts, this happy day.

Me and Nessie jump out of Ed-Ed volvo. We so happy, we going to have so much fun. Me sensing all the fun everyone having. Leah walking over to us, me happy to see her, me knowing she will win. Me sensing frustration and defeat from others on her side, those who like her taste like wolf and people. They must be getting out, Leah must be staying in I am thinking.

Me go running over to her and hug her. "Leah me is missing you!" I yell.

"I am missing you to buddy," she said.

Leah smell nice...really nice...she is smelling very nice. Makes mouth water. Me pull back and look at her, she not look different. Maybe she is having new perfume like what Ro-Ro uses to make herself smell better.

"You ready to play ball?" she asked.

"Yes!" me and Nessie shouted.

We walked over to the others who were still playing. Me know who play. Vampires versus werewolves. Werewolves like Leah. They taste wolfie and humanie, they have skin like her, some lighter, some darker, all have black short hair. Guys being taller and buffer like Em-Em. That okay, Leah more pretty then them.

I see other girls here as well. They not like Leah. They be all humanie. Me wonder why they are being here. What makes them so special. Than me sense it. There was...something different about these three girls. They human but there was something...powerful connecting them to three other wolves.

It was like what connected Ness-Ness and Jake-Jake. It be like million metal chains wrapping them to wolves, they be bound so tight that something happens to one it affect to another. Me amazed, me thought it only be Jake-Jake and Ness-Ness. Ness-Ness say she and Jake-Jake imprinted. She say it magical bond that is stronger than love.

Ness-Ness wrong though, imprinting not stronger than love. Imprinting is love. Pure love. Love in its purest form. Imprinting strongest pale pink me ever see. Imprinting is million flavors of love. It be devotion, compassion, fascination, Allure, attraction, devotion, trust, sympathy, understanding, tolerance, lust, desire, and many emotions Matthew not know name for or how to describe.

Imprinting is truly beautiful, it is sacred. The love these people have for one another stronger than any love, even love Cullen's and Denali's have for mates. Vampires love one another greatly, make no mistake, me feel sorry for moron who hurt one mate or the other. But love of imprints transcends love one has for friends or family.

Me wish Leah be my imprint, me love her lots, me know she slowly growing love me to. Maybe one day she imprint on me?

The wind blow in our direction, the thunder claps loudly in the sky. Then it hit nose. Smell. Mixed in the smelled of vampires and stinky smell of wolves were the scents of humans. But one scent in particular smelled really good. It was like smell that had been on Leah only stronger and closer.

Me eyes narrow on one human, she have nasty scar on side of face, like animal claw her face. Me imagine all that blood gushing out, all that thick beautiful, natural blood that smelled so divine, better than any blood Matthew is ever tasting.

Matthew knowing he not supposed to drink humans any more, he knows if he attack girl her imprint and other wolves will attack. But Matthew not caring, her blood calls to him, sings to him, begs him to free it from paper thing flesh with razor teeth.

"Oh no!" Ed-Ed says.

"Get Emily out right now!" he roars, his voice boomed louder than thunder.

But it too late, me let out snarl and charge forward. Nothing will stop me from having blood, this is my forest, she is my meat, my prey, I will have her and no other.

* * *

 

Leah P.O.V

I suppose we were all responsible for what happened next.

I mean Sam and the others should not have brought their imprints to a game between vampires and werewolves, the Cullen's should not have let Matthew come. I mean he had only been drinking animal blood for little more than a month, his entire life had been on a diet of human blood, plus he was not in a fit mental state to be around humans.

But I was not expecting Emily to be his fucking siren. I remember learning through Jacob's memories of his time with Bella how she was Edward's siren. La tu cantante those euro vamps called it. A person whose blood is so addictive to a certain blood the said vampire has an intense need for it, more so than any other.

And of course Matthew's had to be Emily.

I knew something was wrong as soon as the wind blew in our faces, as soon as it did Matthew went rigid and sniffed the air. The playful child left his eyes and the deadly predator returned with a vengeance. I knew long before Edward said anything that we were fucked.

"Oh no," he said his face full of horror. "Get Emily out right now!" he roared so strong I swear my ear drums almost burst.

The game instantly stopped and everyone began to move, the wolves to the girls, the vampires to us, but it was too late. Matthew sprung forward like a cat that spotted a mouse, which was not a bad analogy.

"No!" I shouted.

"Matthew!" Nessie screamed.

Edward shot forward, Matthew was fast, but Edward was faster. He pinned Matthew to the ground, Matthew snarled and tried biting at Edward. The Cullen's ran forward surrounding him.

Then it hit us, a wave of revulsion and fear. It squeezed my insides like ice and I feel to the floor, I have never felt such paralyzing fear in my life, I was not the only one . The vampires all shouted and screamed and fell to the ground immobile.

Matthew got up and smiled sinisterly, his eyes trained on Emily. My fear mixed with the fear that gripped me. I was afraid, afraid for Emily, afraid for Matthew, afraid for us all. I wanted to stand and fight but the fear kept me in place. I was scared of Matthew. What if he bit me again? I did not want to die.

I watched in horror as the wolves all phased and charged at Matthew, I was suddenly reminded of my dream. He ran straight at them and then one by one the wolves all phased back, naked and paralyzed on the ground, unable to do anything but whimper as Matthew ran past them. Emily, Kin and Rachel had long since climbed into Sam's truck and bolted. They drove at break neck speed but Matthew caught them. I watched as he grabbed the back of the truck and lifted it up so I could not move.

I always wondered how strong a hybrid was, now I was finding out. He may be small and young but he picked up the back of that truck like it was a tissue. He snarled, spit flew from his mouth and I heard the girls screaming in fear.

I was going to watch her die, Emily was about to die and I was too scared to move my fucking pinky. I tried to summon the anger to phase, I tried to find the will to move, but it was all over shadowed by fear. I thought all was lost, until suddenly like a light being flipped the fear disappeared.

"Leah hurry!" Bella said, appearing by my side in an instant.

Bella! Her shield of course! I got up and ran, she ran with me. Kate got up as well as. Nessie had to stay behind, things were about to get messy.

I phased, shedding my clothes in the process. My arm hurt like fuck when I did. I did my best not to limp, not to slow down as I ran. Bella was only able to shield me and Kate. In order for her to expand her shield she needs to concentrate which is hard to do when you are running.

We ran past the wolves, I glanced at Sam as I passed, I saw him urging me on with his eyes, begging me to run faster, to save Emily.

I could hear the girls screaming, calling for their men, Matthew gripped the truck tight and flipped it so the roof was on the ground. Hybrids are stronger than I thought. I heard the girls screaming in fear, saw the windows shatter from the strain. Saw Matthew move to where Emily sat on the driver's side, saw him reach in to grab her.

I growled and plowed into him, he was so distracted with Emily he did not see me coming. I slammed into him and sent him flying. He hit the ground hard leaving a small impact crater. Before he could react Kate jumped on him and used her power on him, Matthew screamed in pain and fell silent.

Kate got up. "Got him," she said.

Kate's power could knock down any vampire, but it could knock out any human. Since Matthew was a hybrid and capable of being knocked out...well he was out.

I padded over to Matthew, he looked so peaceful, like he was dreaming.

I turned back and looked Bella was helping the girls out of the car, Sam, Paul and Jared came running over. Naked but not caring. Sam roughly pushed Bella aside and grabbed Emily who was crying.

Edward appeared by Bella's side, growling at Sam. Some of the wolves had phased and were growling menacingly at the vampires. It was like the night he bit me only so much worse.

"We did not know she was his singer, we made sure he was well fed before he came," Carlisle was saying.

Jasper was doing his best to keep things calm between everyone. Had he not been here it would have been much, much worse. As in there would have been a fight and people would have died right then and there. Nahuel came running over to Matthew and me, he checked his little brother over.

"He will be fine, he'll wake up sore as hell though," Kate said.

Carlisle was still talking. "I did not think it possible for them to have singers; their blood lust is not as strong as a full bloods."

"Not strong enough!" Sam roared. "He tried to kill her!"

Lightning flashed in the sky, followed by thunder. I had a bad case of de ja vo. I remembered my dream, how my father warned me a storm was coming. Looked like it was already here.

"We will take him back to our house at once, I am so sorry for this Sam," Carlisle was saying.

"No, he is too dangerous, first he bites Leah, now he attacks my imprint." Sam looked at Matthew with pure hate. It made me ill to see that look on his face. It was not a look I liked to see on him. The Sam I knew was wise, calm, thoughtful. But anger boiled deep in his eyes.

I knew then and there he would see Matthew dead, the power of the imprint would not allow this threat to live. I knew nothing anyone said or did would stop Sam. Sam wanted Matthew dead and he would see him dead.

"Sam please he is only a child," Carlisle begged.

"No he is a monster, nothing you do or say can change that, he is dangerous and needs to be put down."

A growl sounded. I was surprised it came from me. Sam looked at me with shock and betrayal. "You defend him? After what he just did? You chose a fucking vampire over your own kin?"

"Easy Sam," Jake said.

Sam glared at Jake. "This is all your fault, if you had just done as I said they would all be dead!"

Tension was building in the air, I could feel it. Things were escalating quickly.

"Just let him go Sam, let the Cullen's take him to Alaska," Jake said trying to be reasonable.

I knew it was too late, so did Jake, but still he was trying. He knew Matthew had fucked up bad; you do not attack a wolf's imprint, period. Because the wolf will make sure you die, no matter what.

There were twelve wolves counting Sam in his pack, five of us in Jake's, counting Jake himself, eight Cullen's not counting Nessie and five of the Denali coven. Nahuel and his aunt stood by me, protecting Matthew. Nessie was being protected by Bella, Esme, Rose and Carmen who had taken her well away from us.

She was trying to get to Matthew but they would not let her, I don't blame them, this was like being near an active volcano that was about to explode. Sam was out matched. Between the Cullen's, the Denali's and if push came to shove my pack he could not hope to win.

"What if it had been Nessie Jake? And Alaska? Take him anywhere in the world and this will happen again, he is too crazy to be allowed to live, his power crippled all of us, you saw."

"I forbid you to do this Sam," Jake said.

"You are not my alpha and you are not the chief yet," Sam snarled. "The elders said if he ever attacked any of us again he was to be killed on sight. They all voted yes on that."

What? Why didn't mom tell me this?

"Leah," Nahuel whispered.

I looked at him and saw the pleading look in his face. "Please take him away, I don't care where but just take him away. He will not be satisfied until he dies. I will not allow that to happen, please take him away, I beg of you."

"Don't you fucking move Leah!" Sam roared. Guess they heard us.

"Leah take him and go," Jake said.

"Leah if you have any sense of loyalty to the tribe, the pack and your family you will kill that thing right now!" Sam roared.

He was right. I could do it, I was close enough. All I had to do was bend my head down, open my jaws and crush his head. Or I could take my paws and run my claws down his chest, opening his chest like ripe fruit.

He was too unstable, he had a power that could bring our downfall, he was a hybrid, the blood of the ancient enemies of my tribe ran in his veins, he had tried to kill Emily little over a week after he bit and almost killed me. Every instinct in my body screamed at me to finish him off. But beyond all that instincts my heart would not allow it.

" _Choices will have to be made, difficult choices. Just know I am always with you and I love you."_

Dad's words echoed in my mind. His words from the dream. Or was it just a dream? We were in a field that was similar to the one in my dream, the sky was dark and lightning flashed and thunder roared, Sam was here and he wanted Matthew to die. The only difference was everyone else was here as well.

If there is one thing I have learned these past two years is we always have a choice, no matter what. It is just up to us to decide what choice is right, and sometimes our choices can seem limited, but in the end it all depends on you and the choice you make as well as you're ability to accept the consequences of your actions.

Sam was right, Matthew was dangerous, too unstable, it would be smart to kill him. But that would be heartless; it would be a monstrous choice. And Leah Clearwater was not a monster. I looked at Nahuel and told him with my eyes my choice. He smiled and formed the words _thank you_ with his lips.

I opened my jaws wide, I heard shocked gasps and cries but I ignored them. I scooped Matthew up in my mouth, careful not to cut him with my teeth and I turned tale and ran.

I heard Sam's furious yell behind me. I dare not look back. I ran as fast as I could, while trying not to hurt Matthew in my mouth. I did not stop running, nor did I look back. Even when I heard the sounds of fighting break out.

* * *

 

Almost an hour later I stopped running.

I was deep in the woods, the clouds had darkened and the wind picked up, the air had chilled and I knew soon it was going to rain. I dropped Matthew on the ground. He was still out. I examined him; I winced at the taste of blood in my mouth. He had a few cuts on his arms and legs but they were beginning to heal before my eyes. I moved him so he was propped up against a tree.

I sat down and watched him. His chest rose and fell peacefully. He looked so innocent and harmless, nothing like the beast that had caused a truck to tip over on its back and try and suck the life from a human.

I sighed to myself. This kid was as bad as Bella if not worse in the bad luck department. I wondered if everyone was okay back at the field. With my pack and the vampires against Sam and his no way he could stand a chance. But you never know. Maybe they might get lucky and get a few vampires before they got taken out.

"Leah," Matthew mumbled in his sleep.

I thought he was about to wake up but he was still sleeping, he was dreaming of me in his sleep. I wonder what he is dreaming of.

* * *

 

_Matthew's dream_

_Father was showing us how to hunt, we found a small group of humans travailing in the jungle. They were what father called "Poachers." they hunted animals against human laws._

_I liked animals. So I took a bit of pleasure when we killed them, we found some animals stuck in cages, some had already been killed, their skins or other body parts severed to be taken back to where ever these filthy beings came from._

_Seraphina was already burning the bodies. By the time she got done they would be nothing but ash._

" _Father, why do humans do bad things?" I asked him._

_I stood by him as we watched Seraphina burn the evidence. My sisters stood behind us, watching as well, some were older than me, others a little younger._

" _Because they are flawed," father said, "but do not be mistaken, they have their finer points. But over the years greed and pride have corrupted them. It is our job to help them understand. One day we will show them there is a better way. We will show both vampires and humans there is a better way."_

_He looked at me and smiled with pride. "You will change the world Matthew, you and you're sisters. You will wipe the world clean and bring forth a new age."_

_I smiled, happy he was happy. I wanted to change the world; I wanted to make it a better place. We all did, with father guiding us we would succeed._

" _Father...was mother good or bad?" I asked._

_The smile disappeared; he went back to his blank face. "You're mother is dead Matthew. I have told you she died as you came out, they all do, you must not think of her, she is dead and never coming back. Thinking of the past will distract you from the future."_

_I said nothing, Seraphina walked over, her blue eyes blazing like fire. The base where the humans staid was in flames. I doubt there will be anything left of anything. When Seraphina burns something, she leaves nothing but ash._

_We ran back home, or to one of the places father had chosen for us to live at the moment. I tried not to think of her but my thoughts turned to my mother. The only memory I had of her was of her dead mutilated body, her mouth open in a wordless scream, her eyes wide fixed in horror, her belly a red ruin._

_I hated that memory, I wish I could forget it but we have much better minds than humans. If there was one memory I wish I could forget it would be that memory._

* * *

 

Leah P.O.V

I waited and tried to figure out what to do next. Should I take him back to the Cullen's? I really wasn't sure where I was. I think was-

Just then I heard a twig break. I turned and froze. He stepped from the shadows as if he was born from them. Sam in his wolf form. I got up and growled at him. He phased and turned human. He raised his arms in surrender. "I just want to talk Leah."

I looked at Matthew; he was still sleeping peacefully, still propped up against the tree. I phased and turned human. "Speak," I said.

He lowered his arms. "Emily is okay, a little shaken up but okay."

"I am glad, what about Kim and Rachel?"

"A little banged up but otherwise okay. When you ran I tried to run after you but that Nahuel kid stopped me." he said Nahuel's name like it was something dirty.

"Was there a fight?"

"Yeah, when he pinned me all my wolves phased and went after him, the Cullen's got involved as well as the Denali's. Jake of course," he said bitterly. "We ran back to La Push, I had everyone stay behind except for Paul and Jared, they came with me to look for you. We split up trying to find you're scent. Jake is somewhere out there too, trying to find you and that thing."

"Jake wants to avoid a war," I said.

"Funny, once was a time I wanted to avoid a war and he wanted one."

"Things change Sam."

"Yeah, they certainly do." he glanced at Matthew; I stepped in front of his line of vision, blocking Matthew from his line of sight.

"He won't stop you know, we know what it is like when a vampire catches a singers scent."

"Edward didn't kill Bella." well if you want to get technical he did, but only after he knocked up and put her through a hellish experience and it was only to save her life...not that he wasn't going to turn her any way.

He snorted. "That is a point of view. Leah, what will you do when he wakes up, with Emily's scent fresh in his mind? Without Bella's shield to protect you, what if he decides to finish the job on you and then go for Emily, you saw what he did, we can't stop him if he decides to come for her, you saw I couldn't even stand up to save her."

"He won't go after her," I said.

"Why are you defending him Leah? What has he done to you?"

"He has done nothing, I am speaking my mind to you Sam."

"I can't let him live Leah, he is too dangerous, all these incidents, you, Emily, they just prove that. It is only a matter of time before the Volturi learn of him. Maybe it will be after our time, maybe it will be before. But one day that Aro will meet one of the Cullen's or the Denali. He will read their mind and see about him and he will come for him. He is too big of a threat to be allowed to live, he is to unstable to. He cannot control his hunger."

He took a step forward as did I. I did not want to give him any distance to Matthew.

"I know it is hard to do Leah, I will do it. We are supposed to protect humans Leah, he is a danger to humans and to the Cullens that Jake loves so much. If the Volturi get their hands on him imagine what they will do."

"I already have Sam and the idea terrifies me," I said.

"Then why? Why do you protect him? Even after he tried to kill Emily. Do you hate her so much you would let her die?"

I snarled at him. "This is not about us Sam. In case you have forgotten I was the one who saved her from him."

"You should have killed him Leah; you had the chance, why didn't you do it?"

"Believe me Sam I considered it, my mind screamed at me to kill him. But my heart said no."

"Damn it Leah why!"

"Because he is innocent. He cannot help being what he is; if I were to kill him or let him be killed it would be the wrong thing to do Sam. Even if he is a threat. The Cullen's can keep him isolated from people, what happened today can be laid on all of our shoulders, we failed him Sam, we should have not let him anywhere near a human let alone three. I will not let him die Sam."

"And I will not allow him to live Leah, he is too dangerous, there are to many risks. I beg you Lee-Lee, stand aside, let me do it, I will take the responsibility, please, just back away, I promise it will be quick."

I glared at him. "No, I will protect him Sam, even with my life, even against you."

The air howled with the wind, thunder raged in the sky, lightning illuminated the darkness. Sam's face was hard.

"So that is how it is?"

"That is how it is Sam; you want him you have to get through me."

"You won't stand a chance Leah; I am stronger and bigger than you."

"Yeah, but I am faster."

"But you're arm is still recovering, that will slow you down."

Fuck he was right.

"Just back away Leah, let me do my job."

"That's the problem; I have a job to do to Sam."

He glared at me. "Damn you Leah." he phased. His black fur helped him blend in with the darkness, like a dog from hell.

"Right back at you."

I phased, ignoring the pain in my front leg. Sam rushed at me and it was on.

 

**Fusedtwilight: But none of you saw that coming. What will happen next? Will she fight Sam off? Will Jake and the others save her in time? What will she do now that Matthew is on Sam's wanted list and how will she protect him? Stay tuned and review.**


	10. Chapter 10

Focused Madness

Chapter 10

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing**

**Last chap we found out Emily is Matthew's siren and in a moment of blood lust he attacks, the momentary fun game of baseball between wolves and vampires comes to a horrifying end and Leah is forced to protect Matthew from Sam.**

**Did I forget to mention she is fighting him all alone?**

**What will happen? Who will save her? Lets find out.**

 

 

Leah P.O.V

We slammed into one another with a mighty crash. He tried to rush past me after he knocked me down, I was fast though I snapped at his back leg and caught his limb in my mouth, he howled in pain as I bit down.

I pulled back dragging him away from Matthew, I got up before he could snap at me with his jaws and stood in front of Matthew. He paced back and forth, trying to get find a way past me to Matthew.

He was treating me with kid gloves, if he wanted to he could mow me down and get to Matthew and finish him. But he was going easy on me. I may be quick but this wasn't about speed, this was a test of strength. As much as I hate to admit it he had me beat in that department. He was too big, too strong.

For once I was glad he still had feelings for me, the only thing saving me from a world of hurt and saving Matthew time was those feelings. He knew I was serious about this, he knew if he wanted Matthew he would have to make me bleed. I hated to have to fight Sam, but I would protect Matthew.

I tried to think what to do. Where was Jake? Shouldn't he and the others be phased right now?

" _Ask and you shall receive," Jake said._

Soon his mind and the others connected with mine. I saw they were running to where I was. Or at least Jake and Seth were, Quil and Embry had their hands full with Paul and Jared.

" _Sam tricked us, he went to the elders and told them what happened. They called us back and demanded we explain what happened. I am sorry Leah; I did not think Sam would chase after you. We got there and he wasn't there and I realized what he was doing."_

" _Just hurry up and get here, I don't know how much longer I can last," I said._

Sam tried to rush past me but I jumped on his back and sank my jaws into his neck, he yelped and tried to shake me off.

" _Hang on Leah, we'll be there soon," Seth said._

" _Easy for you to say," I growled at him._

I pushed Sam to the ground and for one wild moment I thought I had him but he pushed back and sent me to the ground, I jumped back up and almost feel forward, my front leg was killing me.

A nearby howl made us both pause, they were close. Sam glanced at Matthew than me. I saw what he was about to do before he did it. He knew he was almost out of time, he had to act now. The kid gloves were about to come off.

" _Leah look out he's about to pounce!" Jake yelled._

" _Leah!" Seth screamed._

I braced myself, he was putting every ounce of strength and weight into this, it was not a killing move, but I knew I was about to be in a world of hurt. I could not avoid it; all I could do was meet him head on. I put all my strength into my back legs and sprung forth to meet him.

I let out a thunderous roar, lightning flashed across the sky as if answering my call. I saw the pain in his eyes. He hated this, hated himself for doing this but he was still going to do it. Because he thought it was right, because it was for the greater good, because he already had a list of ways to say he was sorry. He could write a fucking book on how to say sorry.

I knew what I was doing was pointless, pound, per pound he had me beat, he knew it, I knew it. But I was a Clearwater and we do not go out quietly.

Time seemed to slow down, images flashed through my heads. Us as children meeting in school, him coming over to have dinner with my family, him asking me out, his face red with nervousness, us going to see a movie, him and me watching the moon over the cliffs, our first kiss, us holding hands as we walked through school, our first time making love, him telling me he loved Emily, him saying how sorry he was for my father, him telling me I had a duty now, him telling me imprinting was all about making babies, so many good memories, so many bad. What would happen next fell into the bad category.

He shook and phased into a human, I saw his face full of shock and horror as he flew through the air to meet me head on.

BAM!

Thunder roared, it was so loud I almost could not hear the sound of flesh tearing, the sound of bones breaking. We hit the ground hard. The smell of blood was thick in the air.

" _Sam?" I said horrified._

" _What happened? Why did he phase?" Seth asked just as horrified._

I looked to my right. Matthew was awake, his hand held out, palm pointing at me and Sam. I knew it was him that did it; it was him that caused Sam to phase back.

"No one hurt Leah," he said.

I was in shock. I looked back at Sam; my claws had pierced his chest. Blood flowed out in rivulets, he was still awake, he was making gurgling sounds, blood leaked from his mouth.

" _Oh god Sam!" I screamed._

" _Leah phase! He can't heal with your claws in him, we'll be there in a few moments," Jake said._

I did not move, I was stunned. This was not right, it was not supposed to be like this.

" _Leah phase back now!" Jake ordered._

I shuddered at the power of my alpha and phased back. Blood squirted from the claw marks. Oh God Sam!" I said.

I pressed my hands over his wounds. He was healing, but he was also losing a lot of blood, it was a question of would he heal before he died of blood loss. I glared over at Matthew, he was still sitting, watching me and Sam. "Matthew give me your shirt!"

He did not move. He flinched when I yelled at him.

"Matthew give me your shirt now!"

I was so mad, it was his fault. All of this was his fault. He should have never come to Forks. If he never come then this would have never happened. Damn him!

"Matthew give me your shirt or I will rip it off you're back!" I threatened him.

He got up and walked over, unshed tears were in his eyes but I did not let that stop me, he took his shirt off and I roughly grabbed it from him and he backed up.

I used the shirt to try and stop the flow of blood, Sam was so pale right now. "Stay with me Sam, stay with me," I said.

His eyes were fluttering; he was falling unconscious, not good.

"Come on Sam, help is coming, think of Emily, you don't want to leave her do you? Think of the wedding, you still have to get married."

The usual pain I felt in my heart was not there when the wedding was mentioned. I did not care about what could have beens, I was more concerned with what could bes'.

"Leah...told...you...dangerous..." he said weakly.

"I know, you were right, I will admit it you were right, come on just stay with me okay everything will be alright."

"Me can take away pain, me can make him feel better," Matthew said.

He reached out a hand but I snarled at him. "Touch him and I will fucking kill you, you understand me?"

He drew his hand back, he looked at me horrified. "Leah, me sorry, me wake up and see he hurting you, me just trying to protect you."

"He was hurting me because I wouldn't let him finish your sorry ass!"

Tears fell from his eyes. I ignored them.

"Leah...so...cold," Sam said.

"It's going to be okay," I repeated. "Jake will be here and we'll get you help and you'll pull through and then you can yell at me and tell me what a dumb ass I am." I laughed. "Imagine how Paul will raze you for getting your ass kicked by a girl, we'll laugh about this all year."

His blood was beginning to stop flowing. I lifted the now bloody shirt. The wounds had healed mostly, he had stopped bleeding. His heart was beating so faintly.

"Leah," he said my name but it was like his mouth was full of water. In fact when he spoke I could hear something wet in his lungs. Shit I must have punctured it!

I quickly rolled him on his stomach, I had to keep the blood from flowing into his lung or he could suffocate on his own blood. He groaned in pain as I moved him that was good, he could still feel pain.

I heard Jake and Seth. Heard them phase and kneel next to me. "I think I punctured a lung, he has lost a lot of blood and I broke some bones."

"It's going to be okay Leah, we are here," Jake said.

"Me sorry, me just wanted to protect Leah from the wolf man," Matthew was crying.

"Shut up!" I yelled at him.

He jumped back and stared at me horrified.

I had to think. What was I going to do? I was in a lot of shit right now. So was Matthew. I can't be mad at him, I shouldn't. Sam had attacked us; if I hadn't stopped him he would have killed Matthew.

If it had been Paul or Jared or one of the other wolves I would not be this angry. But this was not just any old wolf, this was Sam. My Sam.

A howl in the distance told us we were going to have company. It was not one of ours. If Paul and Jared were fighting Embry and Quil then where was Sam's other wolves? Had the caught the scent of his blood?

A series of howls ripped through the air, panicked, distressed. Yep, they knew something was wrong.

"Leah you need to go now, if they show up and find out what you did I cannot guarantee they won't attack you."

Leave...yes...leave. I had wanted to do it for so long. Leave. Leave this life behind me forever. Maybe it was time I did just that. Leave, start over. Forget my old life and make a new one.

Matthew was crying now. If I left him here Jake would not be able to protect him either. A part of me wants him dead, a part of me wants to watch the wolves tear him to pieces. Then I remembered the dream I had. Choices had to be made.

I promised him I would protect him. Clearwater's keep their promises.

I walked over to him, not caring if I was naked. "Listen, you are coming with me got it? I don't want to hear a single peep from you, understand, do as I say or I swear I will let the wolves kill you, got it?"

He nodded his head quickly. I turned to Seth and Jake. "I am taking the kid with me. Don't try to follow me, I will contact you."

Jake nodded. Seth got up and hugged me. "Be careful Leah."

I hugged him back. "I will, take care of mom, she'll need you when I am gone."

"I will," he said, a single tear fell from his eye.

I walked back and phased. Barked at Matthew. I lowered my back to him and I felt him climb on. I ran to La Push, I had some things I had to get.

* * *

 

Matthew P.O.V

It hurt to be touching Leah, she so full of guilt, anger, loathing it make me feel sick. Me would like to make her feel better but me in enough trouble already.

She so mad with me it is being scary.

Me not remember much of what happened, me smell tasty girl and me kind of remember me chasing her and other humans, me remember the desire for her, me remember the pain when Kate-Kate shock me. Me kind of remember radiating fear so strong it paralyze others so they not interfere.

Than me wake up to sound of fighting. Me wake up and see Leah fighting black wolf. Me get mad and make wolf calm when he jump at Leah. He turn human and Leah squish him, but me get confused when she feel pain, shock, horror, stunned realization.

She so mad at me. Me know why. It being man she have feelings for. Me knowing she love man, they have connection see, it like mighty plant that once be big and strong, but now it withered and weak, it still alive, but it being much weaker than what it once was.

Me know they be much in love once, but it had been ruined by pain, betrayal, tragedy, bitterness, resentment. But no matter what the plant endures. They always have connection, deep in hearts they still love one another, but his love burn for imprint now and not even former love can compare to love of imprint.

That is why Leah being so mad at herself and me. She still loving man and now he hurt really bad because of her. We run and me not speaking, she very mad right now, so mad she might hurt Matthew so me being quiet so not to make her mad.

Me scared now, Matthew has been a bad, bad boy. Me not knowing what we be doing next, me not knowing what will happen next. What if no one want to be with Matthew now? What if they send Matthew away? Alone.

Me bite back sob. We run and run, me bury head in Leah's fur and take in her scent. It help make me calm. Me hope Leah forgive Matthew, me not know what me do if Leah not forgive me.

 

Leah P.O.V

My leg hurt like hell as I ran to La Push, I had feared that I would run into one of Sam's wolves but I did not.

Soon I arrived home, I phased and grabbed Matthew's hand and went to the door. First order of business was getting some clothes. The door was locked; I looked under the welcome mat and found the key.

I unlocked the door and went running upstairs. I was too mad and scared to care about being subconscious around Matthew but still.

I dragged him into my room and quickly got a change of clothes. Then I quickly ran to my closet and found my old traveling bag, the one I used to pack when I used to visit Emily when she lived in Makah. I had not used it in a long time. It was big; I was able to pack a lot of clothes in it. After it was packed and I grabbed some personal belongings and then I looked under my bed.

I found the coffee can where I kept my money I had been saving up. I looked inside and counted. I found five hundred dollars. That would help, it was all I had. There was more in the bank but I did not have time to make a withdraw.

I ran into Seth's room and got a shirt for Matthew, I had to rip the bottom out to make it more his size but it was still too broad shouldered for him to wear but it had to do.

"Come on," I said. I used my good hand and my injured one to grab his hand. I popped a pain pill and put the bottle in my bag. We went downstairs and I found mom's car keys. Someone must have driven her to where ever she was now.

I found a notepad and a pencil. I paused. What should I write? Goodbye doesn't seem good enough. Taking a deep breath I told her not to worry, that I was okay and I would call her soon. I also told her I loved her and I would miss her.

We went outside and I unlocked mom's car, I tossed the bag in the trunk. I unlocked the passenger side of the door. "Get in," I said. He got in without a word.

I walked to the other side. I unlocked the door and opened it; before I got in I looked back at the house. I have lived here all my life. So many memories here. Good and bad. When would I see it next? Would I still be welcome if and when I came back?

God I wish I didn't have to do this. I wasn't just doing this just for Matthew. I was doing it for me as well. I have wanted to leave for a while, to try and sort out my life, away from Sam, away from the pack, away from La Push, but things kept on coming up that kept me from going.

But now I had to go, doing that to Sam...it made something snap inside me. I still loved him, even after all the shit we had been through I still loved him so fucking much it was pathetic. But seeing his broken and bloody body, knowing it was me that had done that to him...I had to leave.

Besides once his wolves find out it was me that did that there would be hell to pay. And Emily...God the thought of seeing her face after she finds out what I did makes me physically ill, I can see her in my mind looking at me with such hate.

I started the car and we took off. I wanted to floor it but I was trying to not attract attention. I turned the radio on; the silence was too thick and uncomfortable. We drove through the roads of La Pus. I kept on looking in the rear view mirrors, expecting to see one of the wolves chasing us or something. But nothing was there.

We made it to the boundary line and found a surprise waiting for us, a silver Volvo parked on the side of the road. I slowed down and came to a stop right beside the Volvo. Nahuel, Carlisle and Edward were waiting for us.

"Big brother!" Matthew said excitedly.

"Stay here," I told him.

I got out. "I'm leaving, I am taking him with me," I said.

"We know, Jake called us," Carlisle said.

Edward walked over to me and handed me a credit card. "It has a five hundred thousand on it," he said.

I took the card amazed. Fucking rich, dick vampires with their fucking rich credit cards. Must be nice to be immortal and have a load of money when the country is going through a recession.

"You should see Alice's card," he said with a smile.

"Where will you go?" Carlisle asked.

"I don't know. I will call you but I won't tell you where. I don't want involved in any more vampire shit, sorry. But I am taking the kid with me, he is my responsibility, after what I did to Sam I can't just dump him on you guys."

I know it was stupid, I wanted nothing to do with vampires but here I was hauling a hybrid with me. But I was serious; I had almost killed Sam for him. Besides If the Cullens had Matthew they would have to leave Forks, I could not let that happen to Jake and Nessie. If Nessie leaves Jake will follow her and Jake needs to stay in La Push to smooth things over.

As long as they did not know where he was they were free from the wolves' persecution. It was a burden I was willing to bear, I mean I did just nearly kill my ex. Might as well continue to look after the little brat.

"Can I say good bye?" Nahuel asked.

"Make it quick," I said.

He opened the car door and bent down to say good bye. Matthew cried as they hugged. "Me miss you big brother," he said.

"I will miss you too," Nahuel said.

"Will we be seeing one another again?"

"Of course, I promise, one day we will meet again," Nahuel said.

He kissed his brother on the head. Matthew turned to Carlisle and Edward and waved sadly at them. "Bye, bye Carl-Carl, bye, bye Ed-Ed. Me sorry me being bad."

Carlisle and Edward took turns giving Matthew a hug good bye. "You be a good boy for Leah, do everything she tells you, okay," Carlisle said.

"Me will, tell Es-Es, Al-Al, Jas-Jas, Em-Em, Ro-Ro, Bell-Bell, Jake-Jake, Ness-Ness, Car-Car, El-El, Kate-Kate, Ta-Ta, Gar-Gar me said goodbye and me missing them too. Me promise next time you be seeing us me be better."

"Take care of him," Nahuel said.

"You can come with if you want," I said.

He shook his head. "I have been in the wilds too long Leah, I cannot live like the Cullens, plus I could not leave my aunt. I would like to but I don't think you would like me eating humans."

No I would not like that at all.

"Just make sure you call the Cullens, they will pass any messages to me." he hugged me tight against his chest.

"I got to go," I said pulling back.

He leaned forward and whispered in my ear. "I wish I could have had you one more time."

That is one hell of a goodbye.

"Here take my Volvo," Edward said tossing me the keys to his precious car. I looked at him shocked. "They could track your mother's car. This has better gas mileage and goes faster."

"Gas isn't an issue," I said.

"The wasting of finite resources is everyone's problem."

What a fucking hippie.

We switched cars and I tossed my bag in Edward's Volvo. After one last goodbye we drove off, Matthew waved at them until I told him to pull his head back in. I rolled up the window and turned on the radio. Piano music played on the radio. Big surprise.

I had no idea where I should go. So I just headed north. I decided to go to Canada. There were plenty of places I could go to hide. I just had to figure out where I was going to hide. It had to be somewhere close to civilization, I was going to need money, it wasn't an issue with Edwards card but still I was going to need a job eventually. Plus the money wouldn't last forever what with bills and food and stuff.

I did not stop driving until nightfall. I found a little motel on the road to pull into. I told Matthew to wait while I got us a room. I got a room with two beds and got the key from the guy at the front desk. We were close to the border, but I was too tired to keep driving, I was so mentally exhausted.

Matthew was still waiting for me when I got back. I grabbed my bag from the back seat and locked the doors and took Matthew to our room.

He went in quietly and sat on the bed and watched me, waiting for orders. I had nothing to say yet. I looked at him in his torn, overly big t-shirt and pants. I was going to have to buy him some new clothes. I examined him closely. I could pass him off as my own kid. Most people would look at his tan skin, dark hair and eyes and assume we were kin.

But he was growing up quick; he was already a few inches taller than what he was when I first met him. I was going to have to keep him from all human contact so we would not have to move so often. I sighed; I was too tired to think.

"Matthew you need a bath."

He got up and followed me into the bathroom. I got the bath ready for him, making sure it was warm enough. I put soap in it to make it bubbly to give him some decency. It seemed ridiculous to help him take a bath, he looked like he was either six or seven, perfectly good ages to bath yourself but mentally he was lacking so I helped him.

I got him ready for bed. I tucked him in and turned the light off. We did not talk the entire time. When I bathed him, when I tucked him in not a single word was said. I stayed awake, no way I could sleep. Every time I closed my eyes I saw Sam's broken body.

What was I going to do? Where would I go? Could I really take care of Matthew all by myself? Would I see my home ever again? These and a dozen more questions raced through my mind. I listened as Matthew's breathing became softer and shallower; his heart beat slowed just a fraction. He was asleep.

I was glad one of us could sleep.

A few hours later I got up and went to the bathroom. I shut the door and sat down on the toilet, and then I cried. I was full of anger and doubt. My life had been going so good but now everything was all fucked to hell.

I could hand him over to the Cullens, but if I did that than they would leave because the wolves and Sam want him dead and Jake would have to be forced to chose between his tribe or his imprint and I already know who he would chose. La Push needed Jake; he was the only one who could fix things between the Cullens and the wolves.

And Sam, god is he okay? Is he alive or...no, I cannot think like that. Sam has to be okay, he has to be, if he dies...well...it is best I not think about it.

I wiped my face and went back out. Matthew was on my bed now. His breathing was still even. Either he sleep walked or he went back to sleep after he moved to my bed. He was curled up in a little ball even with the sheets covering him. Even asleep I could tell something was wrong. His eyes were moving quickly behind his eye lids and he made these small whimpering sounds.

I remembered him telling me how even in his dreams he remembers the fire. Even in his dreams he burns. Is it any wonder why he is the way he is? Not because his dad was a sick twisted freak who thought it was okay to knock poor human women up and let their spawn rip their way out of their bodies (man I hope he died a slow death)

It is because no matter where he is, awake, or asleep he is haunted by a burning pain so powerful it shattered his mind. And it followed him where ever he went. I walked over to the bed and lay down next to him. I pulled him close to me and hummed the Quileute songs I grew up with as a child.

His eyes stopped moving and his mouth curved into a slight smile, he went slack but stayed in a fetal position. He was like a child with his mother. I was going to have to be a mother now, I would nurture him, raise him, protect him, teach him, feed him. Everything a mother was supposed to do.

The world was so dangerous for him, more so than it is for humans or vampires. How many would use him? How many would abuse him? How many would kill him? Was he aware of the danger he truly was in, of the chaos he could bring? I doubt it. How do you tell someone who can hardly speak right the complexities of life?

I had no idea what life had in store for me or him, but I have made my choice, I will protect him. No matter what.

 

 

**Fusedtwilight: So it was Matthew who saved Leah who in turn accidentally horribly mangled Sam. Now her and Matthew are on the run, where will they go? Where will they live? Stay tuned and please review.**


	11. Chapter 11

Focused Madness

Chapter 11

**Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki.**

**So now Leah and Matthew are on the run, where are they going? What will they do? Lets find out.**

 

Leah P.O.V

The next morning I used the payphones outside to call home. I absolutely dreaded doing this; I wanted to be a chicken shit and just forget about it and put it off. But I had to do this. I owed more to mom than that; I can only imagine how worried she is right now.

I am still kind of ticked at her, how could she vote for Matthew to be killed and not even tell me? I mean sure I didn't expect her to tell me everything about her elder business but I think she should have told me about this.

The payphones were right outside the motel right next to the road. I made my way to them, checking the area, inspecting every car, every shadow, everything that moved in the corner of my eye. Like I was waiting for the wolves to pop out of thin air or something.

I reached into my pocket and pulled out the quarters and put them into the slot. I dialed the numbers and waited, two rings later and mom answered. "Hello?"

She sounded hopeful and worried. Like she was hoping it was me. She also sounded tired; I had to wonder how long she had been up waiting by the phone, waiting for me to call. "Hey mom," I said.

"Leah? Oh thank God Leah, are you safe? Are you okay?" she asked.

"Yes, I am okay and safe mom."

"Leah you need to come back home now. You need to help sort out this mess."

"How is Sam? Is he...okay?" I asked.

"Yes, he is still recovering...why did you do that to him Leah? Sam of all people?"

"It was an accident, I didn't mean to do that to him, he phased back to human when we were fighting," I said.

"I know, Jake told us all about what happened. Why would you fight Sam over that monster?"

I knew who she meant by monster. "It was an accident mom; he didn't mean to hurt Emily."

"I know what happened Leah, he most certainly meant to hurt her, he meant to kill her."

"He's better now; he barely even remembers what happens."

"Leah he is dangerous, what more do you need to see before you realize that? First he bit you, than he attacks Emily and now he causes you to almost kill Sam. He needs to be put down."

"He's not a dog mom!" I growled.

"He is too wild and dangerous Leah. What if he bites you again? Who will be there to save you this time?"

"I will be more careful."

"Leah just give him to the Cullen's and come home. The elders understand it was not your fault, they will go easy on you."

"Mom...I am not coming back."

"Why not?"

"Mom, if I give him to the Cullen's they will have to leave, you and I both know Sam won't allow him anywhere near Forks, he attacked Emily and you know how wolves are about their imprints. So the Cullens will have to leave and if they leave than Nessie will leave and Jake will follow her. La Push needs him."

"Let them hand him over to that other coven then this does not concern you Leah."

"Mom, this works for me as well. I have been wanting to leave the rez for a while now...now I finally found a reason to leave."

"Leah Clearwater that is enough! You need to come back home to me, to Seth, to your family!"

"Mom please. I need this as well. I need to do something with my life. Something that doesn't include turning into a giant mutant wolf or hunting monsters. I need some isolation and I need to get away from that."

"You won't be getting away from that, you have that hybrid with you."

"I know that. And it will be tough I know, but maybe if...if I can just focus on one thing, protecting him, then maybe I can do everything else as well. Find a house, get a job all that."

"Leah you can't get a house, he'll eat your neighbors."

"I know and I have plans, ideas."

"Please tell me these plans and idea's," she said sounding doubtful.

"I'm not giving him up mom, I almost killed Sam over him I can't just hand him over...I can't explain it but if I am willing to almost kill the man I...loved than I should keep protecting him myself."

"Leah, baby I know you feel bad about Sam but he is alright, we all know it was an accident. He is so worried about you; Sam has be calling for you. He has had all his wolves trying to track you down all night. You owe Matthew nothing."

"He needs me mom, he depends on me."

"He has the Cullens."

"It is different with us mom...there is a connection, I can't explain it but it is there."

"Leah, has it ever crossed your mind he is using his power on you?"

"If he was the Cullen's would have told me mom."

"Leah please, if you want to move out we will find you a new house, we'll get you to college I promise, but please just come back home."

My throat tightened at the sound of her pleading, I could hear the worry in her voice. I could see in my mind the tears forming in her eyes. I wanted to tell her yes, I wanted to feel her arms wrap around me and make me feel better. Like when I was a little girl and I got hurt or sad about something and she would hug me and make it all better.

But not even her hugs could make this all better.

"I will call you later mom, I love you. Tell Sam I said sorry."

"Leah wa-"

I hanged up. I leaned my head against the cold phone and fought the urge to cry. I added a few more quarters and dialed the Cullen's. "Hello?" Carlisle answered.

"Carlisle it's me," I said.

"Leah, how are you?"

"Shitty but I will live. We're okay. We spent the night at a motel."

"How is he?"

"Quiet, nervous, how are things on your end?"

"Well the wolves have not shown up yet. I did inspect Sam, he will survive, you did a number on him though, but in a few more days he will be up and running."

"Why is it taking so long for him to heal?"

"You did a lot of damage, his healing factor has a lot to heal. Plus I had to reset some broken bones."

I let out a small sob. I remember what that had been like when Jacob had his bones reset after that newborn got a hold of him. I remember the pain from his memories; I remember the sound of his screams as Carlisle reset the bones. The thought of Sam going through all of that made my heart break.

"He will live Leah."

"I know...how is Nahuel?"

"Sad, worried. Did you want to talk to him?"

"No. Tell him I am taking care of Matthew. So far no problems."

"Leah, we would be happy to help you."

"No. He is my responsibility now, I won't have you guys risk Sam's wrath. He won't stop Carlisle, even after what I did, hell he might be more hell bent on finding and killing him now that I am with him. Mom thinks Matthew is using his mojo on me."

"I can guarantee he is not. Whatever connection you and him have it is all natural."

"I know. I will call and keep you guys up to date on our situation and if things get to much for me to handle I will call."

"Leah, we can take him, it might be good for us to leave now anyway."

Once again I was being offered to have Matthew be taken out of my hands, I could say yes, I could just hand him over and be done with it. But once again I was going to say no.

"If you leave Nessie goes with and Jake will go with you. La Push needs him Carlisle and I don't want him to have to choose. It will be too hard on him and I know who he will choose. We'll be fine."

He sighed, I could hear the regret in his voice. "Very well, but please, if anything goes wrong do not hesitate to call us."

"I won't."

I hanged up. I walked back to the motel. As I walked I saw a small family, a mom, a dad, two kids, a boy and a girl. I smiled softly at them. How easy they must have it. How happy they must be. I wonder what they would do or feel if they knew a werewolf and a hybrid vampire had slept in the same motel they had.

I walked back in the room and found Matthew awake, he was watching T.V. "Leah," he said.

He looked nervous and guilty, like he was afraid I was going to start yelling at him again or something. "Hey."

I turned the T.V off and sat down next to him. He sat next to me looking at his feet. I didn't need some super freaky power to tell he was nervous. "Come closer," I said patting the extra space between us.

He scooted closer and I put my arm around his shoulders. He relaxed a little. "Matthew. Do you remember what happened yesterday?"

"We came to play, me was very exciteds to play, than me smell something wonderful, it was a human, blood smell very good...things begetting fuzzys after thats. Next thing me is remembers is seeing you fighting that Sam person, me not want you to be hurt so me make him turn human. Why was he attacking you?"

"Matthew...when you smelled that girl's blood."

"His imprints."

"Yes, her name is Emily, she is my cousin."

"Really?"

"Really. See vampires drink blood, but there are some people out there whose blood smells and tastes really good to a certain vampire. When that vampire catches their scent they will do anything and everything to get it. That is what happened to you yesterday. Emily was you're singer, her blood called to you and you lost all control and tried to kill her."

"Oh no, me sorry Leah, me not remember me-"

"It's okay, she is alive. But when you attacked her you made Sam angry because she is his imprint and you know how strong an imprint is."

"Me know. Me so sorry. Me not want to hurt her now...though memory of blood make mouth water."

His eyes lost some of their focus and I could see the animal start to appear.

I snapped my fingers in front of his face. "Focus!"

He jumped. "Sorry's. So why Sam attacking you when me wake up?"

"Because he wanted to kill you for attacking Emily, but I wouldn't let him."

"But...she you're cousin. Aren't you mad at me's?"

"Well I am not thrilled but I know you didn't mean to Matthew. See we all thought since you were only half-vampire that you would not have a singer because the lust for blood isn't as strong in you as it is in a regular vampire. But Sam didn't care and wouldn't listen and I fought for you."

"Me sorry Leah, me not know what else to do, me get mad when me is seeing him hurting you. Me want him to hurt as well."

"I know, but he is important to me Matthew. He is someone I cared about. Now we have to stay hidden for a while, because if the wolves find you they will kill you."

"What about the Cullen's and the Alaskan's?" he asked.

"Well if the wolves found out the Cullen's have you than the wolves will want them to leave and if that happens it will make Nessie and Jake sad."

I wasn't going to go into great detail about the situation, no point, I knew his mind wouldn't be able to fully grasp everything. Wasn't that he was dumb; he was just a kid is all. You know how it goes, one question leads to another than another, than another and so on and so forth.

"Will I ever see them again?" he asked.

I hugged him tight. "One day, when you are older and you have learned how to control your cravings."

He pulled back and looked at me with that look he gets when he is seeing something I can't. "You have doubt Leah. Me is seeing it, but me is not knowing what you is doubting, are you doubting we ever see friends again or you doubting me ever having control?"

Shit. Fucking empathy vision thing. Truth was it was the latter I doubted, I just did not think he could gain any form of control even if he was fully grown. Once again his mentality played a major factor here. Fuck why can't there be a vampire that has some convenient power that could cure him of his condition, things could go so much smoother than.

"I am just nervous about what we are going to do next is all," I lied.

"You are lying Leah." he got an angry look on his face and pulled away from me and crossed his arms. "I am not being a baby Leah, I do not like being babied...except by Es-Es or Car-Car. Oh Ro-Ro too...Al-Al and Bel-Bel too I guess...oh it's fun when the others baby me too, lots of fun it is being then...okay me like being babied but me is not liking being lied too."

I sighed. "You're right I am sorry. Truth is I am not sure when we will see any of them again. Things are really tense back in Forks right now and I think it best if we keep our heads down."

"I am not understanding."

"It means we need to keep a low profile, we need to stay hidden, we need to not draw attention to ourselves."

"Me is doing that," he said with a smile.

He got up and stood in front of me. "Watching this Leah."

I was wondering what he was about to do when suddenly...he wasn't there...I mean he was there but I could not focus on him. I mean I knew he was right in front of me...but I didn't want to know he was there, I didn't need to know. It was like he was something the corner of my eye. I knew it was there but I could only see it on the edges of my vision.

"Hello." he waved at me, in a second he was right in front of me.

"Whoa!"

He laughed when I jumped. He just popped back in place. I mean he wasn't invisible. But I couldn't focus on him, I felt stupid, it was like there being an elephant in the room and you just ignored it than suddenly a few hours later you're like "Holy shit an elephant." kind of like that.

"How did you do that?" I asked.

"Me is radiating ignorance, lack of perception, repulsion, confusion, you know, stuff to make you not seeing me. Me do it before to make people not see me and leave me alone. It really handy when hunting."

I wasn't going to ask if he meant hunting animals or humans because I think I already knew the answer to that question. "That is a neat trick Matthew, can you do it to more people?" I asked.

He nodded. "Oh yes. Me radiate something and everyone feel it."

"What do you mean radiate?" I asked.

He got that look on his face someone gets when they are about to explain something very complex and detailed. "It is like the emotions are inside me, millions and millions of strings, each one a very specific color, each one unique. They being like great big maze that interconnects, crises, cross's, and interconnects, or a great big ball of string that is made of of millions of colors of emotions. Me pick on string and focus and it like that string comes shooting from body. Sometimes me use more than one string, sometimes me connect more than one string to make whole other emotion."

He began to dance in small circles, like he was hearing a tune only he could hear. "Me wish you could see what me see's Leah, to see every emotion, to feel every feeling. To see the millions and millions of colors, red's browns, blacks, whites, greens, oranges, silver's gold's, purples, indigos, blues, greens, pinks, yellows, crimsons, scarlet's, topezs, lavanders, pales, greys, lights darks, alizarin, almond, amaranth, purples's, magenta's, amber's, amethyst, fuchsia, ao, apricot, aqua, ash, aresenic, bronze, burgundy, drab, denim, emerald, fawn, flax, folly, grullo, harlequin, iros, mint, melon, ochre, onyx, prune, pearl, and colors I am having no name for and emotions me not knowing how to describe, me is sensing and seeing it all."

He stopped dancing. "But I do more than see and heal, I manipulate, I focus, I radiate." he held up his hands and wiggles his fingers. "Like strings between my fingers. Some soft as silk, some so sharp it feels like they will cut me to shreds."

He took his fingers and interlocked them with mine. "Leah, what do you think my colors are like? Do you think they are like yours? Do you think they shine bright or do you think they are muddy and dull?"

"Can't you see?" I asked.

He shook his head. "Me try. Nothing there. No light, no colors, no strings. Is it because Matthew is wrong? Is it because he is bad?"

I smiled at him. "You are not wrong Matthew. You are just different is all, and bad is a choice; you don't want to be bad do you?"

He shook his head.

"Than don't be. Remember you always have a choice, you can chose who or what you want to be."

He smiled and he wiggled his fingers slightly against mine. "Warmth, compassion, belief in one's words. Underlying tones of worry and doubt. You truly believe what you say."

"Yes I do."

"I am scared Leah."

"So am I."

"I know, I just thought you should know that you are not alone."

It occurred to me he was using I's and proper grammar. I hugged him close. "Everything will be okay, I will take care of you, I promise."

* * *

"Oh he is such a little angel."

I turned from the A.T.M to find a little old lady smiling warmly at Matthew. It was a few hours later and I decided to pull some money from the A.T.M.

Matthew smiled at her and she cooed over him. She patted him on the head and looked at me. "Is he yours?"

I smiled. "Yes, he's mine."

Matthew beamed at me, the delight and happiness truly made him seem angelic, I could name a dozen artists I know that would love to draw a picture of him right now.

"He is so beautiful, his father must be quit the looker."

My smile faded a little, I decided not to answer. But she saw it and she got this look on her face, like she was ashamed of herself. "Oh, I am sorry dear, forgive my rudeness. I didn't mean-"

"No it's okay. His father is-" dead and in hell where he belongs "-on vacation."

That is one hell of a euphemism for being dead. I saw her eyes widen in understanding and she looked at Matthew with pity. Matthew cocked his head to the side. "Compassion, sympathy, pity, understanding, a feeling of shared pain. You think you have something in common with Leah? What is you and hers having in commons? You and her is not being anything like one another...you not taste like wolf, you human."

I squeezed his hand and hoped he could feel my caution and nervousness. I wanted to tell him to be quiet and not talk in front of the old human lady. Her eyes widened and she looked at me in sympathy. "I know what you are going through, my Steven died before our firstborn son was born." she gave me a hug and I was feeling awkward as hell. She pulled back. "My son has a child that is autistic, it is not easy I know but it can be done. Children with special needs are just as precious as any other child."

"Leah she is knowing Matthew is special! Is she magic like El-El?" Matthew asked.

A laugh escaped my lips. She thought Matthew had some mental disorder...technically she is right. But she also thinks I am a single mother raising a child all by herself. Ha! What a day. For some reason I was feeling better, to think a little strange humor and awkward meeting can make your day.

"Um, thanks. Yeah it's tough but he is worth it."

"Take care dear, you too Matthew, make sure you are extra good for your mommy now."

"Me be good," Matthew said with a smile that could melt a heart.

The old lady beamed at him and went on her way. God I can not wait to tell Seth about this...oh yeah. I sighed and we walked back over to the Volvo. We got in and drove off. I had gone through Edward's CD's but found nothing but piano music and stuff. So I just had to settle for the radio. I decided to go to Alberta, Canada. It was far away enough and I was sure to find a place there.

Or rather I would have to find a place nearby. No way I could live in the city with Matthew. All those poor unsuspecting humans wouldn't stand a chance against Matthew if he got thirsty. So I had to find someplace where I could keep him and I isolated while I work. I could do what the Cullen's did and find a nice isolated home in a town near Vancouver.

But even if I did get a job than who would look after Matthew while I was gone? Maybe I should have tried harder to get Nahuel to come with us.

We reached Alberta and I found a rest stop. I found some maps and stopped by a McDonald's real quick. I was starving, I hadn't eaten since yesterday. I decided on one area near the city of Calgary. It was isolated and it was only a thirty minute drive to the city. I did consider a town called Jasper, thought that was funny.

A few more hours of driving and soon we found ourselves at another motel. I asked the guy that worked there where I should go to by a house. He told me of a place where I could go and I took notes. I learned the town I wanted was called priddis, and it was not a town, it was a hamlet. For those of you who do not know a hamlet is a place with a population so low it isn't even a village. From what I learned there was only a population of a thousand and a half. It was perfect.

In our room Matthew watched T.V. He laid on his belly, his feet kicked up in the air. I was on the phone and making some calls. It took me a while but I got hold of someone who was renting a place down there. I told them I would meet them in a few hours.

I got off the phone. Things were looking good, this time tomorrow we might have some place to stay. "Leah I ams hungry," Matthew said.

"Okay, you want to go to Burger king?" I asked.

"Not human hungry, blood hungry," he said.

"Oh...how long has it been since you ate?" I asked.

"Since before game yesterday."

"Oh, are you sure?"

He nodded. "Okay, we'll go out and find you something."

We walked outside, I made sure to grab the key to the room and put it in my wallet. We walked out into the woods careful not to be seen. I hid behind a tree and phased. I waited for the flood of minds and thoughts, but it was silent, no Jake, no Quil, no Embry, no Seth. I was alone. For the first time in a long time my mind was it's own.

I small part of me was giddy. I no longer have to hide my thoughts, I no longer have to watch what I think, I have nothing to hide from no one. But a larger part of me was missing the pack mind, the connection, the feeling of being part of something greater.

I guess I was truly on my own, I guess me leaving La Push had severed my link to the others. A part of me was uneasy about this, no connection meant I could not call for help.

We found some deer, Matthew had two. I ate nothing; just made sure he didn't run off or catch any human scents. An hour later we were back in our room. We got ready and packed our bags and headed out to Priddis. Turns out Edward has a G.P.S in his Volvo. Lucky bastard.

Priddis really was a small place; I only passed like four houses on the way in. Forks had more houses than this. I found the house, it was out in the middle of nowhere. I had to take a turn on the road and after a few minutes of driving found the house.

It was a two story house, colored in a reddish brown color. There was a garage and it looked decent enough. There was a truck parked in front and I saw a man inside. He smiled when he saw us coming. He got out to greet us; I parked the Volvo and turned to Matthew.

"Be careful what you say Matthew, he cannot even have an idea we are not human. Also I want you to pretend to be my son, that way he won't ask questions."

"Okay Leah." I saw the twinkle in his eyes that told me he was happy to play the part of my son. A soft streak of warmth crossed my heart.

We got out and I kept a careful eye on Matthew. He seemed relaxed as he usually was, I took his hand in mine and we greeted the man.

"Hello, welcome to Priddis," the man said. He was older, late forties, early fifties. He had a small mustache and was balding on the top of his head. He wore a pair of glasses that made his eyes which were green with flecks of black seem bigger.

"My name is Lance, I own the building you see here."

"Hi my name is Leah, this is Matthew...my son," I said.

"I love you mommy," Matthew said latching onto my leg.

"Mommy loves you too sweetie." God I hope he didn't go overboard with the mommy thing.

"So where you from Leah?" Lance asked.

"Washington," I said hoping he didn't as where exactly.

"Really? I have family down there. So what brings you here?"

"Looking for a place, somewhere close to the city but with a strong outdoors, vibe you know."

"Well you came to the right place. It's very quiet here in Priddis, nothing much happens. You moving in would be the most exciting thing to happen 'round here for years. Well come in, let me show you around before we start talking money."

He led us inside and it was nice. It had three bedrooms all at the top and two bathrooms. Awesome! There was a nice cozy little fireplace in the living room which connected right to the kitchen. There was a basement and an attic. There was already a T.V, and some furniture, a washer, a dryer, three beds.

"Rent this out sometimes to people who need a vacation or have business in the city and need some place cheap. How long you planning on staying?" he asked.

"Oh...for the long run most likely," I said.

"Really? Well that's nice, get some new blood in this area, be nice to see some new faces. You got a man going to live with ya?"

"No, just me and Matthew."

"Mommy no need a man, she is having Matthew and Matthew is loving her much."

He frowned a little at Matthew's _unique_ vocabulary. "So uh...how old are you Matthew?"

"Two or three."

Shit.

Lance looked at me. "Um, he has...special needs if you know what I mean. I home school him mostly, I am the only one who can get him to focus."

"Where is his daddy?"

What is it with old people and asking personal questions like that? It's none of his business if I have a man or not. But I just smiled.

"His daddy is D.E.A.D," I spelled for him.

His eyes widened. "Oh, um yes. Well it's not much, sadly if you want anything fun to do, you'll have to find it in the city. Were a very small and quiet community. We have a bowling alley, but that is pretty much all."

"Everything is fine, anything I should know?"

We talked the price and rent and all that. It was well in my range.

"I'll take it. Can we move in today?"

"Sure, I always keep these places spic and span. You have anything you need to be moved in? I know some guys who would love to help a pretty lady like yourself."

"No thanks, we are good. Does the phone line work?"

"Not right now, I will call the company, should be up tomorrow."

"Great."

"Place has basic cable, has H.B.O and cinemax so uh, might want to make sure the kid isn't up watching that station at a certain time."

"Got it."

I gave him the money and he shook my hand. "Good lord girl, you okay? You hot."

"Oh yeah, I just run a little warm," I said.

"Okay, I expect you will be getting lots of visits soon. Community this small when we get new blood it's a big deal. Wouldn't be surprised if they had a small welcome party for you."

"That would be nice."

"Well I will come back tomorrow and check on ya'll tomorrow, have a nice day."

We waved him good bye as he drove off. We took our bags inside. I was going to the city tomorrow and give Edward's card a good workout; I need to get food, new clothes for us and a few other things to add a nice touch to the place.

Quite a few people showed up, some women some men, all coming to welcome us to the community. The women cooed over Matthew. Some of the men looked me up and down, I could tell from the look in their eyes they liked what they saw, I admit I was flattered and some of them were good looking and nice enough, but I had no room for another man in my life. Or boy.

Soon night fell and I and Matthew ate the foods that our neighbors brought us. Cakes, pies, and all kinds of desserts were given to us. We dined well that night. Soon it was time for bed. I choose my room, it was the largest and it had a bathroom. We took showers and headed off to bed. I didn't say anything about Matthew sleeping in my bed again. There was no reason to.

I held him in my arms as I tried to sleep. Tomorrow we had a lot to do, I also had to call home tomorrow as well and check up on things, let people know I was fine.

The last thing I remember was falling asleep with Matthew in my arms; I heard the sound of the old songs humming. But it was not me that was humming, the voice was sweet and graceful and melodic, it fell on my ears like wind chimes, soon I was asleep.

* * *

 

Matthew P.O.V

Matthew make Leah go to sleep.

Me is knowing it bad to do but me have things to do and me not wanting Leah to wake up. Me get up releasing her arms from me, me not scared she wake. Me make sure she full of tired.

Me smile at her sleeping form. Me touch her cheek, she warm like me is. Me feel bad about what happen in Forks, but Matthew is having a confession, me is liking this now. Me likes having Leah all to myself. Me miss Cullen's, yes I am missing them much, but Matthew is feeling happy knowing Leah be with him all time now.

Me know she is missing her friends and home so me not feel overly happy about her being with me. But me not helping it, Matthew not have to share her no more, we can play and live and do everything together, she never leave me again, me like that lots. Me glad me not have to leave with Cullen's and go away, me feel so sad if that happen, than me is not seeing Leah again.

But there is trouble, me is seeing those men who came and visit. Me saw them look at Leah, me saw dark pink in them, dark pink is lust, they be lusting after Leah. Lust not like love, me know they want Leah to, they want her all to themselves, but they not having her!

Leah is mine now, mine to protect, like how she protect me. Me protect her from everyone and everything. Nasty dirty men not be having my Leah.

Low growl comes from mouth, Leah does not move, she sleeping. Me know me should be sleeping, but me just want watch her sleep. She protect me in day, me protect her at night. Me know how to do that.

Me close eyes and concentrated. Me focus power out all around us. Me sense Leah of course, me sense animals in woods, me sense humans distantly. Me find distance me is needing, one mile in all directions, that should be good enough.

Me focus on the strings, they shoot from body, invisible to all but Matthew. Me spread them far and wide in one mile in every direction. Me have to be careful, not make it to obvious. First layer me weave forgetfulness, people hit this layer they forget what they doing and why they coming here. If they get through that they find second layer, a light layer of repulsion. This repulsion feeling is made from desire to avoid, and lack of focus. Third layer is made from indifference, this place not matter, it not important.

Satisfied, me blend strings together. My tie the strings tight. Now no one is wanting to come here, if person try they finding themselves both forgetting why they here and deciding we not important to visit, very subtitle, very clever.

Smiling pleased with work for even animals and bugs avoid us now. If wolves show up and make trouble they not find us so easily and if they hit field Matthew make web more powerful.

El-El taught Matthew this while he and family visited us. Me make web go for many more miles if me want but me not want to make people notice whole land findable.

Me go back in Leah's arms and rest, me not sleep, me just listen to her, feel her strong arms around me, holding me, protecting me even in sleep.

Me love Leah much now. She all me is having, me miss big brother Nahuel, me wish he had come, but me know what he mean by not settling down good. Matthew find it hard to live with Cullen's, they extra nice and me love them all. But me is being very wild, they to tame.

Big brother Nahuel is more wild though, me know that. Me want him happy and we see each other again though. Me know me see all Cullen's and Alaskan's again one day. Me look forward to then, but for now me happy with just Leah. Me know she take care of me, me know her love for Matthew is growing and Matthew is not causing it to grow, it all natural.

Everything go good now, everything be right. We are a pack/coven now me and Leah. We will look after one another and protect one another. Leah during day protect Matthew, during night while she sleep Matthew protect Leah, he also protect her from men who think lusty things for her.

Matthew is knowing daddy is dead, Matthew know what D.E.A.D is meaning. But me figure out long time ago. Me figure it out from way people's lights look when me ask about daddy.

Me sad daddy is dead, me wish me could remember more about him and others. Me feel sad they gone leaving Matthew alone. But Matthew not alone any more, me have Leah and she be like both daddy and mommy to me. ME not let anything happen to her, anyone hurt Leah...Matthew make them so, so, so sorry. Sorry they ever live.

 

**Fusedtwilight: Next chapter Leah and Matthew face an unexpected complication, they thought they escaped vampires and werewolves, but it is a big world and plenty of places to meet a vampire. What will they do and who is this mystery vampire? Stay tuned and review.**


	12. Chapter 12

Focused Madness

Chapter 12

 

 

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki and thanks to the reviewers. Last chapter Matthew and Leah settle in top a new home. This chapter their location is in risk when they meet a vampire who is prowling the area for food. What happens when he finds them? Or should I say what happens when they find him?**

Leah P.O.V

A month went by and it went smooth, I hadn't found a job yet, I still had plenty of money from Edward's nice card so a job really wasn't that important. Plus I still had the money I got when dad died so we still had a long while to go before money became an issue.

We made some new friends, our neighbors (do they count as neighbors if they live more than two miles away?) visited plenty of times. They even had a small picnic party to welcome us. I was pleased at how well Matthew behaved, he really didn't talk much, and he was very shy to meet so many people.

Plenty of the ladies cooed over him, giving him hugs and pinching his cheeks. Poor kid.

I had called home a few times, each one more tearful and heartfelt than the last call. I talked to Seth. He missed me and was wishing I was home. I missed him too. I missed his smile, I missed his laughter, I missed his humor, and I missed his cheery outlook on life.

I missed everyone back home, my pack, Sam's pack, mom everyone. I missed being a part of a pack, I felt so lonely when I phased, though it was nice to think whatever I wanted and not having to worry about pissing someone off.

I was in the kitchen right now, getting ready to make a call. Matthew was in the living room watching T.V. Normally I was no fan of sponge bob square pants but when it was on Matthew was like a zombie.

I dialed the home number and waited. Three rings later I heard someone pick up the phone. "Mom?"

No answer.

"Seth?"

What was going on? I heard someone, someone manish. Was it Charlie? Was he feeling awkward for picking up?

"Leah?"

I froze. I know that voice.

"Sam?"

"Lee-Lee. Are you okay? Where are you"

I was frozen. My throat felt tight and like something was wrapped around it. I could not speak, my eyes began to blur with tears.

"Leah? What is being wrong?"

Matthew must have sensed what I was going through; even the power of sponge bob could not distract him from my inner turmoil.

"Is that _him_?" Sam asked. I flinched when he said _him._ It was full of venom and scorn.

"Matthew, go watch T.V, I'm having a grown up conversation."

He stood there; I could see the conflict on his face. I was about to tell him to go again when he turned and went back to watching T.V, but I could see he was no longer listening.

"Lee-Lee are you okay? Are you in danger?"

"Stop fucking calling me that!" I hissed.

A tear dropped from my eye and I angrily wiped it away. Fuck why was I feeling like this, I was feeling angry and guilty and relieved all at once. I knew Sam was okay, it took him a bit longer to heal than Jake took because he was hurt worse than Jake had been.

But to actually hear him, to know from his voice he was not angry at me. It made me feel so good.

"I am fine, perfectly fine, safe and sound."

"Thank God," he said sounding relieved.

"What are you doing at my place?" I asked.

"Waiting for you to call, Sue hoped if you talked to me I could convince you to come back."

"Why would I come back?"

"Because this is your home, we are your family, everyone misses you Lee."

"I doubt that."

"It's true, I miss you, Emily misses you, your mom, Seth, your pack, hell even the other imprints are worried about you. Sue's friends are always asking her where you are. Paul and Jared are still out looking for you, trying to find some trace of where you went."

"They won't find anything, might as well tell them to stop."

"Do I need to tell you what everyone is saying? What they told me to tell you when you call? 'Tell that girl she needs to come home, tell her she needs to be with her family.' that was Billy. 'Tell Leah we miss her, La Push isn't the same without her to patrol with,' that was Paul. 'Please come home Leah we are not mad at you, we want you back with us, we want to know you are safe,' that was Emily. Do I need to go on?"

I blinked tears from my eyes. I was touched, the fact people were so desperate to have me back home made me feel so happy.

"I miss home too Sam, believe me."

"Then come home."

"No."

"Why not?"

"Sam...things are going good for me right now. I have...something of a normal life right now. No vampires, no phasing. I have my own place; I am looking for a job. I have settled into my new place. I would like to come back, but I have a good thing going for me right now."

"A good thing? A good thing? Leah you're stuck babysitting a hybrid who is more dangerous than an entire coven of vampires!"

"He is mine Sam, mine to care for, mine to protect. I won't give him up, not after...what happened."

"I forgive you Leah, I know it wasn't you're fault. There is no need to take on some absurd penance."

"This is more than a penance Sam. If I give him to the Cullens they will have to leave, I know you won't allow him back."

"Damn right."

"Exactly, they leave they take Nessie and Jake has to make a choice that no one should have to make."

"So you have to suffer to make everyone happy?"

"Wouldn't be the first time," I said.

"Leah-"

"No Sam, this is a good thing, someone can watch over him, make sure he stays out of trouble, and I can work out my life, get back on track. I was considering leaving anyway, but I always found some excuse to stay, this helped give me the kick in the ass I needed. This is all for the best Sam."

"What if he bites you Leah? What if he goes berserk and tries to attack a human? You saw what he did to all of us, if Bella hadn't used her shield Emily would be-" he didn't say the words. His voice raised in anger at the memory of what happened, of what could have happened.

"There are risks Sam I know. But things are going good, there have been no incidents. I handle him very well."

We said nothing for a while. Then he spoke. "I won't stop looking for you Leah."

"I know, and I will never stop running. It's what I am best at remember?"

"How could I forget? I won't stop until you are back home where you belong Leah, this is your home, you belong with us, not with that thing."

"That thing has a name. And I will protect him, for as long as he needs me."

"Leah this is insane, you can't spend the rest of your life protecting him."

"Watch me."

I hanged up. The phone rang a few more times but I did not have an answering machine yet so I was not worried about him leaving some heartfelt message.

Finally after a while it stopped ringing and I could no longer hold back the tears.

"Leah?" Matthew was by my side, Sponge Bob square pants forgotten. "It was _him_ wasn't it?"

I looked at him surprised. When he said _him_ it was like when Sam said it on the phone, it did not have the level of scorn Sam's had, but it was the closest I have heard him come to expressing something with extreme distaste.

"Don't be sad Leah, he is stupid. He make you sad, he is stupid, me wish he was dead! Me should have bit him when he was bleeding and human! I hate hims, he hurt you and makes you crys!"

His body shook in anger, for one wild moment I thought he was about to phase, but then he burst into tears.

"Matthew?" I asked confused.

"Me sorry Leah, Matthew knows you love him still, Matthew knows he make you hurt him, but Matthew was afraid he was going to hurt you. Matthew wasn't wanting you to get hurt because of him and-"

I wrapped my arms around him, hugging him close. "Oh Matthew. You shouldn't hate someone or want them dead, especially just because he made me cry."

"But me not like it when you cry Leah. When someone makes you cry me want to hurt them."

"That's what everyone feels when someone they love Matthew, when they love someone and the person gets hurt they want to hurt the one who hurt them back."

"Thank me want to hurt me because me hurt you by making you hurt that dark wolfie."

"His name is Sam, and I know you don't like him but Sam and me have...history. We have been through a lot together and I got hurt but he did not mean to hurt me. Sometimes we hurt people and not mean to, and that is what happened with us. I still care for him."

"Me is knowing. He is still caring for you to. Matthew saw its when you fighting. That what make me so angry, he still care for you but he still going to hurts yous, you not hurts ones you loves."

"The only reason he came for me was because I wouldn't step aside so he could kill you. Remember you attacked his imprint, you were going to kill her and would have had we not stopped you."

"She did have good smelling blood."

His eyes began to glaze over and that familiar primal instinct began to return.

"But," I said loudly getting his attention back. "It still would hurt a lot of people if she was killed, me one of them."

That was true; I had a few nightmares of Emily's corpse with Matthew standing over her, blood dripping from his mouth.

"Sam had every right to go after you Matthew, but I would not let him and although it pained him to do so he fought me to get to you. Think, if someone tried to hurt me you would want to hurt them back right?"

He nodded.

"And wouldn't you go through anyone who stood in your way?"

He nodded again.

"Well that's what Sam was doing, protecting his loved one from someone who tried to hurt you."

"Then why did you protect me?"

"Because I know it was not your fault, because I feel we made an error in letting you be around humans that they should not have been there. Because I think with enough time and patience you can be around humans and not have to be watched."

He hugged me. "I love you Leah," he said.

"I love you too."

I meant it. I was a little surprised but there was no denying it. I had grown to love the little freak. In this month he had slept in my bed every day. He had his own room which he rarely used. But it was always with me he spent his nights with. We hunted together, we ate together, we watched TV together, we went for walks around the woods together, I told him the legends of the tribe, the ones we told to outsiders, the ones we kept hidden. I cooked for him, I cleaned for him, I was trying to get him to clean himself in the bathroom.

I woke up in the morning to him, held close and tight in my arms. He slept better if I was with him; it helped keep the nightmares at bay.

I realized than the full responsibility I had. I was doing more than protecting him...I was raising him. Didn't I just have a parent/child talk with him just know? Didn't I teach him right from wrong? Didn't I try and mold him into something that could meet the world head on and survive it?

And so the she-wolf became a mother to the lion cub...fuck that sounds like a saying from a lame novel.

* * *

Matthew P.O.V

Me and Leah sleeping again. Well she sleeping, me is watching her sleep again. Me put up web again so no one is finding us. Me take it down in morning, me not tell her. Me is knowing she not like it when I stay up late. But me like watching her sleep, me is liking protecting her, makes me feel useful.

Nothing had come near us, even the animals stayed clear of our house, this is making me happy, me is doing something right.

Me talk to Cullens today, Leah called them on the phone thing and me talk to Ness-Ness. Me miss Ness-Ness, me miss others too. Big brother Nahuel left to go to his home and he is having no phone so me is not able to talk to me now.

Me is hoping he is safe, me not wanting to lose another sibling.

Then something comes across my field, I recognized the taste of it in my head. Vampire. It not taste like Cullens or Denali coven. This was someone new. It was a boy, his glowy stuff tastes male. But...there was something odd about this one. He was special, like Ed-Ed special or Alice special. I tried to focus more of my power on him, gets a better reads on him but it was like something about him repelled my senses.

I than realized with a start he got through my shield! How is he getting through shield, he should not be doing that! Me try and focus on him but the more me try and do it the more I felt sick. It like mind and senses know he is there but not wanting to know he is there. Stomach start to hurt with disgust so me do only thing me can do now.

"Leah! Leah wakes ups!"

"Huh, what's wrong?" Leah asked dark purple spots in her aura. Dark purple is tired.

"Vampire is coming!"

She woke up, dark purple vanished. "What where?"

"He get past shield and is coming here!"

"Shit, where is he?"

"Me not know, me just sense him get past web, me not know where he is now."

"Web, what web?"

There be sound in the woods, we both hear it. Shuffling of feet on ground, someone walking towards us. Acting quick me radiate panic, fear, uncertainty, and focus on where the thing is coming from. Me feel the strands wrap around him, me feel the panic, fear and uncertainty wrap around him and me feel it take root and force him to flee.

"It okay, me make him go away," me said.

"Stay here," she said.

She got up and left me in her room, me listen to her walk outside and into the woods. Me hear her sniffing the air. Than me hear her come back inside and into the room. "He got close to the house. Matthew what was this about a web?"

Me looked down guiltily.

"Well me want to protect you at night like how you protect me in the day so when you sleep me make web of emotions to keep people from finding us."

"You can do that? Cloak an entire area?"

"Me not make it too big, just one mile around house, even animals avoid us, you not notice no birds or crickets or other animals?"

"Now that you mention it...but then why did this vampire get through?"

She not chastise me for staying up so me not going to give her chance too.

"Well he is special like some of the Cullens. He is being like Jasper and me...but...he has very specific flavor."

"What do you mean?"

"Jasper and me work with many flavors of emotions. But this one he only use one in particular, one strong emotion."

"What emotion?"

"Repulsion."

"Repulsion?"

"That how he got through, web made to repulse things, but his power repulse too."

"So it's like two magnets with the same polarity, they repulse one another. So maybe his power and your...web canceled one another out."

Me not knowing what polarities are, but if it help her understand okay.

"He really strong Leah. Me tried to focus on him but his power...it made me not want to. It was like the more I tried to focus on him the more it made me physically ill. It like he have aura that makes you repulsed just to be near him."

She sat down on the bed and put an arm around me. Me lean in close to her, taking comfort in her touch.

"Can you modify your web to counteract his power?"

"Yes, me know flavor of repulsion he is having, me know recipe to make him stay away."

"Good, I want you to do it. Right now."

I did as she wanted; I focus on web and add a little stronger does of fear and doubt and much more dose of apathy. That should be keeping him away.

"It is being done," I said.

"Good." she look at clock and groaned. "Five in the morning. Might as well get up. Now we are going to have a little talk later about you staying up all night later young man."

darns it, me hoping she forget.

We got up and got our showers. I kept the web up a little longer than I usually do, keeping watchful eye for anything that try and get close in case vampire man comes back.

We not hear or see anything about vampire man. Me not to worried about him, what me able to sense from him me know he not being a threat, he was being curious. Me not know what he curious about. But somehow we drew his attention, me wonder how.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

My nerves are shot. Some Leech is prowling around and had it not been for Matthew I would not have known it.

I was glad I learned about this web thing he can do, that will make things so much easier in the future.

I was watching the morning news when I got a hint about the said vampire.

"Another missing persons case has been reported, this brings the total people to have disappeared from Riley park to a total of five. Authorities have not released any news of suspects or any other info about the investigation. For the past two years the once peaceful Riley park has become a place of dread for the locals due to the alarming increased rate of disappearances."

Riley Park? That is like forty-five minutes from here.

"Matthew, let's go to the park."

I dressed in a pair of jeans and a white shirt and dressed Matthew up. I brought a small ball and we drove over to the park. It seemed to be too coincidental. Disappearances increase and the night before a vampire comes close to my house. Very coincidental indeed.

The park was like any other. I found a parking spot and we got out and the sun was out. Matthew's skin glowed. I could notice it more than a human because my eyes were much better than a human's. Matthew held the ball, slightly tossing it in the air then catching it.

We were trying to blend in, a mother taking her son out for a nice walk in the park.

We walked around for little more than an hour, I was beginning to think there was no connection between the vampire from last night and these disappearances. Then I caught it. The scent of vampire. It was hours old but it was there and it was the same one from last night.

"Leah, I am smelling vampire," Mathew said sniffing the air.

"Me too, it is the one from last night."

"We are being followed."

"What? I don't smell anyone."

"Because you don't want to smell anyone Leah."

"What?"

"Leah remember when Matthew said he has the power to repulse?"

"Yeah."

"Well he can make you repulsed by the idea of him. He can make himself invisible because he makes himself so repulsive the senses just glaze over him."

A horrible thought crossed my mind. "Matthew...is he watching us now?"

"Yes."

Shit!

"Me notice him a while ago. Me sense him, me remember his taste."

I looked around, there were a lot of trees but they weren't to close to one another. Plus the sun was out and if he was in the sunlight surely I would notice him sparkling. But Matthew said he can make himself so repulsive the senses just go right over him. Could he be in the sunlight behind us right now and his power keeps me from seeing him?

Could he be walking up to me right now ready to snap my neck?

I quickly looked behind and saw nothing. Is this how he got his victims, made them not see him before he plunged his teeth into they're necks.

"Leah be calm, he is not meaning harm."

"I thought you had trouble sensing him?" I asked.

"Me do, but I can study him for a few seconds, than me look away."

"What do you mean he is not meaning harm?"

"From what me see he is curious, cautious, watchful. He is studying us. But I sense no intent to harm or hurt. He knows of us and he wishes to learn more about us."

"He must have caught our scent in the woods," I said.

We would go out in the woods sometimes. Just to walk or to hunt animals. I helped Matthew hunt but I did not partake in the kill, I had the money for nice normal human food. This vamp must have been passing through one night and caught our scents. We did go for a little hunt earlier that night so it was possible he caught our scents when they were still fresh.

"Leah, human is coming from the front."

I could hear the human. I caught sight of him; he looked like a park ranger.

"Quick, toss me the ball," I said.

We spaced out from one another and began to toss the ball. The ranger got closer and I saw we caught his attention. "Excuse me," he called.

We stopped playing and turned to the ranger. "Yes, is something the matter?" I asked.

He walked up to us and looked at the both of us. "I hate to be a bother but you should not be alone."

"Why?"

"Are you new to the area?"

"Yes."

"Well I am afraid there have been some disappearances around the park as of late. You should have another with you, it is not safe for a woman and her...son?" he made it a question.

"Son," I said.

"Yes a woman and her son to be all alone in the park, even during the day."

I smiled flirtatiously at him. "And you figured a nice young strapping young man like yourself would help keep an eye on us?"

He blushed a little and he smiled. "Well there world is a dangerous place, especially for a pretty woman."

Matthew growled low in his throat and glared at the man. I got a little worried then, the hair on the back of my neck stood up at that sound. It was the sound of a predator.

The ranger ruffled Matthew's hair affectionately unaware of the danger he was in. Matthew did not look impressed about the hair ruffling.

"And what is your name son?"

"Me is being called Matthew and me is not being your son. Me is thinking you have duties to perform and you should leave us alone and go do them nows."

The ranger got a glazed over look in his eyes. "You are right, pleasure to meet you both, carry on."

He turned and walked away. I waited until he was out of ear shot before I turned on Matthew. "That was not right Matthew," I said sternly.

"Me not like him, he getting soft pink feelings for you. We are having no time for soft pink, we have vampire following us to worry abouts."

It sounded logical, but I could not help but notice the slight tinge of jealousy in his voice.

"Where is he?" I asked

He closed his eyes and focused. "Behind us, he is keeping his distance." he got this disgusted look on his face. "Makes me sick trying to focus on him."

I tried to think of what to do. The vampire knew about us and was now following us. It didn't matter where we went he would follow. Plus he was the one going around and killing people. Both my human instincts and my wolf instincts agreed on one thing. He had to die.

He was a threat to both us and the humans in the area. I may not be a part of a pack anymore but I am still a werewolf and my nature demands I end any vampire who was a threat.

This was duty, this was survival. But I was all alone, I had no idea how I was going to kill this fucker, had I had help, another wolf or two I had a better chance. Killing a newborn was easy, they were wild, unfocused, controlled by their emotions. Easy to kill if you are an experienced wolf.

But for all I knew this leech was years old and experienced, plus add in his repulsive power and I was in for a world of hurt. Should I call Jake and the others? But if I did that I would reveal our hiding place and we would have to run again. Jake wouldn't tell but Seth would know and I didn't want him to know because he would think about me and then Quil and Embry would know and sooner or later someone would slip and Sam would find out.

Plus if Seth knew where I was and mom found out...I did not want Seth watching mom mope about me being gone knowing he knew where I was, that would be cruel.

But I was not alone...I had Matthew. I have seen Matthew's power, he brought two covens and two packs down with a single twitch of his eye. Surely he could make a vampire paralyzed long enough for me to finish him off.

But my conscious kicked in. He was just a child; I was trying to teach him to be more civilized and what not. I doubt having him help me kill someone even if it was a vampire.

"I think we should kill him Leah," Matthew said.

His response was so sudden and in tune with what I was thinking it startled me.

"What?"

He looked at me as if we were disusing who would win the next football game. "Let's kill him, I will draw him out with my power than freeze him and you can finish him off tonight."

"Matthew...that is a good idea but...I mean."

It was a very good idea, yet it seemed so wrong to use him to help me kill. I know he has killed before but still.

"Leah he is a danger, dangers must be eliminated. But me is having a request."

"Okay. What?"

"Before we kill him...can we talk to him?"

"What?"

"Well he seem nice, he not try and hurt us, he just watch us, I sense his curiosity, he is also cautious, tinge of worried too. He is a little threatened by us."

"You sense this?"

"When I look at him yes. Me know he not bad, or liking hurted people. He curious about us and worries we might hurt him so he follows and watches. Me sense he not bad so me not feeling right about killing him out right. Me want talk first, see if we work out understanding, he stay on his side, we stay on our side."

"Matthew, he is killing people, I kill vampires who kill people, it is in my nature."

He looked at the ground, his face dropped a little. "You not kill me when me attack scar face."

Scar face? He must mean Emily. Well shit he had me there, plus he had killed a load of other people.

"You are different, you only drink animal blood now."

"Please Leah, me hide you and draw him out, you watch and listen he try and hurted me we kill him. Plus we can show him animal blood is good for us too. We can make him yellow like Cullens and Alaskans. Plus he could be a useful friend. You make treaties with Cullens and they turn out useful and nice."

Okay, he may have a dozen screws loose but obviously he has a sharp mind. His plan was perfect. Plus he was giving me the puppy dog look, fuck I hate that look.

"Okay," I said.

"Yippe!" he said throwing his arms in the air.

"But we have to wait until it is dark out, that way no humans can see us or interrupt us," I said.

"Okay."

"But if he even so much as bares his teeth at you he is dead, agreed?"

"Agreed."

"Okay, so since we have eight hours to kill let's play some more ball."

We played ball a few hours, than we took a little walk, than we rested under some trees. I told him some more stories. We met a few more guards and Matthew used his power to make them go away. Normally I did not like that but I did not want any distractions. Soon night began to fall and we watched the setting sun.

I was nervous, Matthew I knew could tell I was nervous but made no comment. Soon the stars began to appear, and the sun set and the moon came out in half her glory.

"Ready?" I asked.

"Ready," he said.

* * *

Matthew P.O.V

We go deep in park, where we least likely to be seen.

Matthew sense vampire on edge of mind. Vampire must not knowing me is knowing he is here. Me sense hims still following us. Me not able to pay attention to him for long, then me feel yucky.

He keep distance though, not to close, but close enough he can follow us.

We go over plan few more times and Leah head of. Me feel her phase, feel the anger at core of her being flow out. Me know she hiding in the dark, me know she is keeping watch. Me think sound of beating heart will distract vampire from sound of hers.

Me weave web and cloak us so no humans interfere. Like with home they subconsciously avoid certain area, not paying it no mind. Not needing or wanting to know.

Me focus and reach around vampire, this really tough, his power makes me ill. Me want gag on taste of power. But that is what it is, it repels. Me think it good shield, you so repulsed by disgust you keep away, you not want to even think about. Me make sure to make notes on exact recipe of this repulsion. It sure come in handy.

Me focus on vampire and increase curiosity and desire to learn more, me squish fear and caution and add courage. It work, me feel him coming. Me stand ready and waiting.

Vampire appear. Me not able to look at him, me look away, he be disgusting for me to look at. But me know it his power. It make him seem repulsive, it illusion of mind. You think it there but it not. The more me try to notice the more disgust grow so me just kind of stare at his feet and disgust slowly fade.

Me know he can increase disgust. He can make me so disgusted me run and hide, me sensing he that strong.

"Hello, me is being Matthew, who you being?" I asked.

He say nothing at first, me sense tension and unease, and curiousness, he is sensing something is wrong. He must be wondering where Leah is.

Finally he answer me, giving his name. "Fred, my name is Fred."

 

 

**Fusedtwilight: HA HA HA HA HA, I bet none of you saw that coming. That's right people, freaky Fred is in the house! I never intended to have him in the story until I read the short second life of bree tanner, I just had to have him in a story of mine. So how will things work out with Fred? Will he be a blessing? Or a curse?**


	13. Chapter 13

Focused Madness

Chapter 13

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing**

 

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Perplexed: To be filled with uncertainty or doubt. Full of difficulty.

Example: Fred is perplexed by Leah and Matthew.

Fred P.O.V

The strange creature in front of me smiled.

I kept on looking for his companion; I did not see her anywhere. She had been here not too long ago; I can still smell her foul scent.

It had been accidental I had found these people, whatever they were. I had been going through Priddis last night when I caught their scents. I had never smelled anything like them before. The girls had something animal like to it, the boy was even odder, his scent had a distinct flavor of vampire but it was mixed with human.

Curious I went to investigate, as I drew close to their house I felt something familiar touch my power. I could not explain it exactly, it was like my power touched something similar, something it could relate too. Somehow my power told me there was some kind of shield up, a shield similar too my power that kept others away, but for some reason I was able to make it through, the power of the shield falling on me like gossamer.

As I drew near to the house I followed the scents too I could hear two heart beats, one faster than the other and voices talking urgently. Then I sudden wave of fear wrapped around me and I fled. I don't know what had frightened me; I just knew I had to run.

I kept my distance than, using my power to keep myself shielded from them. Following them, watching them. They went to Riley Park and I followed. I watched them play, I watched them talk, I watched as every so often some park ranger would come over and talk to them than leave looking a little glossy eyed.

I noticed the girl who was around her early twenties, Native American with tan skin with a tinge of red and black short cut hair with very pretty green eyes kept looking around every so often, like she knew I was here. But every time she spotted me her eyes slid off me. My power was truly amazing. It kept people from seeing me, hearing me, smelling me, even thinking about me.

It caused that part of the brain to completely ignore me all together. Like a blind spot on a radar system. You don't know I am here because you don't want to know I am here. Interesting huh?

As darkness fell I continued to follow the girl and the boy. The boy looked like he was about six to eight years old. He had black hair that fell past his ears a little with warm coffee brown eyes, his skin was a light brown color and in the sun...it glowed. Not sparkle like my skin when the sun hit it. It glowed just ever so slightly, not enough for most people to notice, but with my vampire seeing I could see it well, his skin literally glowed, not like a light, just enough to seem more luminescent.

His eyes would flicker between joy and amusement, to caution then curiosity. A few times his eyes lingered on where I stood a few yards away and before I could use my power he would look away.

I followed them as they went deeper and deeper into the park. I watched as they said something than the woman ran off into the dark night leaving the boy behind. Curious as to what was going on I continued to observe the pair.

Than for some odd reason I began to feel less and less cautious. I found my curiosity about this boy grow, I wanted to learn more about him. Why does his skin glow slightly in the sun? Why does his heart beat faster than others? Why does he have a vampire scent mixed with his?

I should not be afraid, I had my power. Plus I was a vampire, I could handle one child. If the female showed up big deal. I could use my power on them too paralyze them with disgust.

I appeared before the boy who did not seem surprised to see me. Instead he smiled and asked me my name and I told him.

"Pleasure to meet you Fred-Fred," he said with a smile.

Fred-Fred?

"What are you?" I asked.

"Me is being a hybrid. That means my daddy is a vampire like you but my mommy is being a human. I lost my mommy and my daddy, I can't find them. I am sort of remembering daddy though, I am hoping I am remembering him so I can find him and hug him and tell him how much fun I have been having. But Leah is looking after me though, she is nice and pretty and strong and smart and tall and she runs fast and she makes the other guys scared of her when they make her mad."

Getting info out of him wasn't going to be hard. He obviously had the same problem all kids had, he talked too much. But I was not going to complain. Already I gained a very important piece of information. He was a hybrid, a vampire father and a human mother. Amazing.

"How is it possible for a vampire and a human to have a child?" I asked.

"Well I asked Carl-Carl once where babies come from and he said that the stork brings babies to mommy's and daddy's. But when I asked Es-Es she said babies come from mommy's bellies, I asked Em-Em and he said mommy's and daddy's make the babies by getting their freak on but before I could ask what he meant Ro-Ro slapped him on the head and told him to shut up."

Okay, this kid was not what I was expecting.

"Where is your companion?" I asked.

"Leah? She is around. We know you were following us," Matthew said.

That surprised me. "How did you know?" I asked. No one had ever sensed me, not when I didn't want them too.

"Me have power silly. I admit you are really strong, me have trouble focusing on you, it make me feel sick, but me sense you and me tell her. Me also sensing you last night, you walked into my web."

"Web? Wait that thing I sensed was you?" I asked.

"Yep, when Leah goes to sleep me make special web that makes things leave us alone. She protects me during the day and me protect her at night. But you got through because I was using a repulsion field and you have repulsion field and they...um"

He struggled to form the words.

"Canceled one another out," I offered.

"Yeah, that is being word. They not affect one another. But I sense you get through and me tell Leah and she be worried but me make you go away with some fear."

"So that was you too?"

"Yep. Matthew protecting Leah from danger, I know you not wanting to hurt us but Leah not like you being around and me not want a fight so me made you go away."

"And where is this Leah?" I asked. Was she a hybrid too? Why did she smell so odd? She didn't smell like Matthew did, I didn't smell anything vampire like about her.

"She is around. We were going to kill you but me wanted to talk too you first because me sense you not mean us harm and me convince her not to kill you until we talk."

"What is Leah?" I asked. Obviously if she thought she could kill me she must be something non-human.

Just then I heard the sound of a mighty heart beating and it was getting close fast. I saw something large and sleek move through the trees. Something furry and silver, running at us like lightning.

It appeared next too Matthew who looked at the creature with great affection. He placed his hand on the wolf's head and patted her affectionately.

"Fred, this is Leah. Leah this is being Fred."

* * *

Caution: Warning, admonishment, precaution. Prudent forethought to avoid risk.

Example: Leah treats Fred with much caution.

Leah P.O.V

Fred?

What kind of name for a vampire is Fred? That is such a common name. Such a human name. So plain and ordinary, not something I would use to describe this guy.

He was tall and looked to be slightly older than the Cullen boys. Not too old, like college old. He was very handsome, even by vampire standards. He had blonde hair. He had swimmer's build but before I could get anymore a wave of disgust hit me and I was unable to look at him. The best I could do was look at his feet. Every time I tried to look back at his face I gagged and looked away.

"What in the world?" the leech asked.

"This is Leah, she my bestest, best friend in the whole world," Matthew said planting a kiss on the side of my face.

As much as I appreciated the gesture I wish I could tell him too save the kissey stuff for later, that we had a vampire to deal with.

"What is she?" he asked.

"A werewolf."

"There are werewolves?" he asked.

"Oh yes, there is lots of thems. Not all of thems is nice though. But Leah is nice, unless you make her mad which is really easy to do."

I yipped at him and he smiled at me, his eyes twinkling.

"Amazing, I never thought there were actually were werewolves. Should have figured, vampires exist so should werewolves. No wonder she smells bad."

Cocksucker, I should kill him right now.

"You not smell so fresh to her you know," Matthew said coming to my defense.

"I am sorry, I did not mean to offend. This is all new to me; I never thought half-vampires and werewolves exist. What else is out there? Fairies? Elves? Goblins? Dwarfs? Witches? Centaurs?"

Matthew looked at him like he just started speaking in tongues. "Me have no idea what those are," he said.

"Oh, sorry...I read a lot of Lord of the Rings when I was human, I let myself get carried away," Fred said.

"What is a Lord of rings?" Matthew asked.

He liked Lord of the rings huh? He must have been made between now and two thousand one, or at least when that book came out, however long ago that was.

I needed to talk with this guy, I gently nipped at Matthew's hand and got him too follow me behind a tree. I maneuvered him so he had his back to me and I phased. "Don't turn around," I said. "Keep an eye on him for me, he tries anything hit him hard and quick."

"Okay."

I spoke loud and clear. "Why are you following us?" I asked.

"I caught you're scent last night, than there was that wave of fear I felt and I was curious. I wanted to know what I was dealing with in my territory."

"Is it you that had been killing people in this park?" I asked.

"Yes, I have killed to feed myself."

"Then we a problem. My kind kills vampires."

The air was silent than. When Fred spoke he was more cautious. "I cannot help it, it is the only way for me to survive, I try to fight it but the thirst gets too much."

"You should be drinking animal blood then," Matthew said.

"What?"

"It's okay Leah, no one fight today," Matthew said without looking at me.

I grabbed my clothes and got dressed. I took Matthew's hand and walked out to face Fred.

"What do you mean about animal blood?" he asked.

"How old are you Fred?" I asked.

"I was twenty-three when I was turned," he said.

"No, I mean how long have you been a vampire?" I asked.

"Close to two years now," he said.

"What happened too your creator?" I asked.

"Dead, if there is any justice in this world." I heard a dark thread of anger in his voice, but I could not look at him to see if his face showed any emotion.

"Well you should know that you're kind can feed on animal blood, it can sustain you," I said.

"It not as good as eating humans but it help make you nicer. Personally me like humans better."

I gave him a look and he looked away.

"So...all this time I could have been eating rabbits and deer and not had to kill people?" he asked sounding shocked and angry.

"Yes. Don't beat yourself up though, not many vampires know this, even less decide to try it out. Like Matthew said eating animals is like a carnivore switching to an herbivore diet. It keeps you healthy and keeps you from going all blood lusty but it does not satisfy the hunger as much."

"I can't believe this. All this time, all this time."

From what I could observe he paced back and forth.

"He mad now," Matthew said.

Fred paced so fast he was a blur; he was muttering to himself so fast I could hardly catch what he was saying.

"I radiate peace and calm," Matthew said.

Fred stopped pacing and looked at us. At least I think he did. I still could not look at him.

"What did you do?" he asked Matthew.

"Me radiate peace and calm so we talk more. Me sense you be good person, me sense you angry about the lives you take. Matthew wants to know if you would like a new life."

"The last time someone asked me a question like that it went bad for me," Fred said.

"It's either that or death pal," I said.

"You think you can kill me?" he asked sounding a little cocky.

"My kind hunt yours, we protect humans from vampires. Well the ones who eat humans anyway. I can't live knowing you are out killing people, that won't happen. Not while I am alive."

"You can live with us," Matthew said excitedly.

"What?" I and Fred said.

"Leah Fred needs help. Let's help Fred-Fred!" he said excitedly.

"One moment," I said to Fred.

I knelled down and whispered to Matthew, I figured Fred could hear us but I didn't care.

"Matthew no," I said.

"But Leah why not?" he asked.

"He is a stranger, that is why," I said.

"But he is a good person Leah, me sense that."

"Matthew I am not going to let a stranger into our home, we can't trust him, he eats humans."

"But we can show him the better way. Plus he can be useful, you have seen his power Leah, you made pact with Cullen's and it was a wise move, why not making another pact. It being beneficial, we help him he help us. Please Leah, we not have to be alone in this. We can have someone we can be trusting too help us. He is a good person Leah, he feels bad about the people he kills."

"Exactly, he is a killer; I don't want him around you."

His face got sad. "You forget Leah, me a killer too. Before you finding me, me being killer as well. Me kill people." his hand touched the scar on my arm where he had bit me. "Me come close to killing you and Sam's imprint Leah. Me change, why not Fred-Fred?"

"Matthew...alright," I said.

"Yippee!" he shouted.

"He gets one chance though, he slips up once and he is gone understand?" I said firmly.

"Yeah, come on, let's go." he grabbed my hand and dragged me over too Fred.

"Fred-Fred, me and Leah would like to invite you into our coven...I mean pack...what do you call a hybrid and a werewolf Leah?" Matthew asked me.

"A really wrong and odd combination," I said.

"So...you are not going to kill me?" Fred asked.

"You are on probation," I said, "we'll help you learn how to drink animal blood and give you a place to stay. But if you slip once I will hunt you down, rip you apart, burn the pieces then for added insult piss on the ashes."

"I do hope you are kidding about the latter," he said.

"You'd best do your best too not find out," I said.

"Okay so when can we go hunting?" he asked.

"First lower you're shields," I said.

"What? Why?"

"I like to look a man in the eye if I am going to let him be close to me," I said.

His shield lowered and I was finally able to look at him. He was tall and blonde. Handsome too. He must have been quit the looked when he was a human, because as a vampire he was very handsome. I had to wonder if his creator made him for his power or his good looks. His eyes were burgundy red.

"Better. Now the house rules are simple. Do not drink human blood and do not do anything to risk me or Matthew, put one undead toe out of line and I will kill you, understand?" I asked.

He looked me dead in the eye and nodded. "I will do my best," he said.

I could see honesty in his eyes. "Good. We will hunt tonight, get you started. Meet us at the house; you remember where it is right?" I asked.

He nodded. "Good. Meet us there."

He disappeared. Maybe he ran or maybe he used his power, all I knew was that he was gone in the blink of an eye. Probably half way too our house by now.

"Yay! We made a new friend!" Matthew said excitedly.

"You know I spoil you right?" I asked him.

"Oh Leah, you won't regret this. Fred-Fred is really, really nice. He is a little weary of us but he really wants to try the animal blood drinking. I think Fred-Fred will be a good friend."

We walked to the car. I was considering calling the Cullens and asking them if they or those Alaskan vamps wanted Fred. I had enough on my plate right now, babysitting a vampire trying to go cold turkey was the last thing I needed. But Matthew was right; Fred could be a powerful friend and ally. If I do get a job I could possibly have Fred look after Matthew for me while I work, assuming this proves to work out.

We drove back home, Matthew was excited. But I figured we needed to have a talk first. "Matthew I know you are excited about this, but I think it best if we keep quiet about ourselves," I said.

"What do you means Leah?" he asked.

"We still don't know him Matthew; I think it best that we not tell him anything. About the Cullen's, the pack, why we are here. At least until we get to know him a bit better, okay?"

"Okay Leah, me not tell him anything until you say it okay."

"You can talk to him, tell him a little about yourself, but let me answer any question she has okay?"

"Okay."

Fred was waiting for us on the front porch. Matthew got out and ran over to Fred before I could stop him.

"We are going to have so much fun. Animal blood is yucky but you get used to it."

I let Fred inside, keeping a close eye on him. He hadn't put his shield back up yet. Matthew was showing him around, Fred listened to him, taking everything in. I saw him watch everything, observing every little detail like he might find some big clue too a secret.

We went out hunting, Matthew used his power to draw in some deer and him and Fred went to town on them. The look on Fred's face was like a child eating broccoli. He did not like it at all.

"I see what you meant," he said wiping his mouth.

"Me know it yucky, but trust me, soon you will get used to is and you be able to control vampy instincts better."

"It takes years though, so don't think you will be resisting human blood any time soon," I said. I didn't want Matthew to get Fred's hopes up.

"You speak like you know some animal drinking vampires," Fred said.

"I do. There are two covens. The leader of the once coven I know works as a doctor. He is so resistant to the smell of human blood he can perform open heart surgery."

Fred's eyes widened. "Truly?" he asked.

"Truly. It took him decades of practice though; he never had any human blood. Well...when he first started out. The only time he drank mortal blood was four times when he created four members of his coven. The younger members of his coven have a difficult time being around human blood, but otherwise they pretend to be average high school students, they go to school and everything."

"So, drinking animal blood lets them live as humans?"

"Well they don't stay in an area for too long, three maybe four years than they move. Sometimes they split and go their own ways for a while."

"Amazing! I never thought that was possible. This thirst...my god, this man must have a strong will. I wish I had thought of drinking animal blood myself, I feel like such a fool."

"Me fool too, me drink humans for a while, than Carl-Carl find me and show me better way."

"So if your father was a vampire how come he wasn't watching over you?" Fred asked.

Matthew looked at me, asking permission with his eyes. I nodded.

"Well me not know. See me wake up in woods all alone with no memory. Except for the pain. Like fire only worse. Matthew dreams about it sometimes but when he sleep with Leah it goes away."

"So what is the difference between a hybrid and a vampire?" he asked.

I answered next. "Hybrids only happen when a male vampire and a human female get together."

"That means they get they're freak on," Matthew said gyrating his hips.

"Matthew!" I said shocked at the vulgar display.

"That's how Em-Em said it was done."

Next time I see Emmett I am going to slap the shit out of him. Seriously, was it because he was Irish that he had no boundaries?

"Any way, the baby grows quickly, usually it takes little over a month for them to be born. They grow quickly, when they reach seven years of age they are physically mature. They have blood and a beating heart as I am sure you have noticed, they glow in the sun. They can eat and process human food but they prefer blood."

"Got that right. Except for chocolate. Chocolate is the best!...I wonder what blood and chocolate would taste like?" Matthew said.

They are fast and as strong as vampires, not as durable, we think they may be easier to kill than vampires but we have not tested the theory. Also some of them can be born with gifts. There are only two other hybrids. Matthew's brother who is called Nahuel, he has no gifts. And another by the name of Nessie who has the power to show other people her memories with a touch."

"Big brother Nahuel is awesome, when me grow up me want to be like big brother Nahuel," Matthew said.

"And what about werewolves? I know they got a lot about us wrong, so what is true and not true for you guys?" he asked.

"Well truth is we are not werewolves. We have recently found out we are shape-shifters. We still call ourselves werewolves though. They call real werewolves the children of the moon. Don't know much about them except they are almost extinct, they have yellow eyes in human and wolf form and only turn into wolves on a full moon."

"But what about shape-shifters? How are you made?"

"What we are is born in us. The gene skips a generation or two. But when a vampires is in the area the gene activates. We have a high body temp. between 108 and 109."

"I know, I can sense it all the way over here," he said.

"You can sense my body heat?" I asked.

"All senses are enhanced, even sense of touch," he said.

"Neat. Any way it takes time for the gene to activate, the signs of a wolf about to phase are growth spurt and increase in muscle mass. It takes anger to make the change happen, it can be anything, even the smallest irritation can set us off. In human form we have enhanced senses, more durable, reflexes, healing, strength, all that. But when we phase we tap into the full scope of our power."

I began to wonder if I told him too much. I didn't want to reveal all the trade secrets. I don't know if I can trust him that much yet.

He eyed my arm. "What happened there?" he asked.

"Vampire venom is lethal to us, it scars too. I was lucky to have survived," I said.

Matthew shifted guiltily but said nothing. Fred didn't seem to notice which I was grateful for.

"I am sorry if I am asking a lot of questions. I always knew there was more to this life, I just never knew how much," he said.

"No problem. If it helps you I'm all for it," I said.

He smiled at me. "Thank you for giving me this chance. I thought I was going to have to feed on humans for the rest on my immortal life."

"Glad to help. It saves me the trouble of killing you."

He looked a little startled and with drew a little. "Leah, don't intimidate Fred-Fred," Matthew chastised.

"I am not scared," Fred said.

"No, you are intimidated; there is a difference between intimidation and fear."

Fred looked at me. "It's his power. He can see emotions as colors."

"Oh. Amazing. I have never met another vampire with a gift before. I never met a hybrid before, or a werewolf."

I didn't mention the Cullens. I figure I wait a little while longer. No offense to Matthew but I am not willing to trust this guy yet. I still needed time before I opened up more to him.

We went back home and Matthew yawned. "Time for bed," I said immediately.

"But Leah."

"No, you have had a lot of excitement today. Time for bed."

I got him ready for bed and tucked him in. "I will be up soon, if you have any bad dreams come get me, okay?"

"Okay."

I kissed him on the head and shut the door and went downstairs. Fred sat on the sofa, he looked a little uncomfortable. His power was on again and I could not look at him.

"So...can I get you anything?" I asked.

"No, I am fine," he said sounding nervous.

"I guess Matthew must have been buffering our emotions, now that he is asleep we feel a bit more anxious," I said.

"Yeah, he is really something that kid. May I ask why you are not with the other vampires you spoke of?" he asked.

I sat down on the seat across from him.

"Some things came up, me and Matthew had to leave."

"Oh...I am sorry for asking. I know you don't trust me."

"It's nothing too personal. Every instinct in me says to kill you Fred. If it wasn't for Matthew I would have...I still have my doubts about this. You have been feeding off humans and that may impact how this goes."

"Is there any hope for me?" he asked.

"I won't lie, it will be hard. But not impossible. One of those veggie vamps was a human eater for over a century, it is tougher for him then the others because of that but he manages to go to school and what not."

"This is all new to me. I was never properly trained, all I was told was lies and half-truths. I was told by the vampire who was in charge of watching me that if I went out into the sunlight I would burn. We were all told that."

"We?" I asked.

"Yes...I am the only surviving member of my coven. Well we weren't really a coven. Just pawns."

"Why were you told that lie about the sun?" I asked.

"So we could be more easily controlled. Many of the kids that were turned weren't the brightest so they fell for it. But there was a vampire who figured it out; she told me the truth before I left."

"Who created you?" I asked.

"I don't know. I only remember she kept her face in the shadows. It was like that for everyone, Riley brought her kids to turn and he kept us under a roof. Man it was nasty, all those psychos constantly fighting and then Kristie and Raoul and their gangs fighting all the time. Riley was constantly having to bring in new kids. Thank god I had my power though; none of them came anywhere near me. Except Bree. But she did it out of self-preservation."

The names Riley and Bree struck something in me. Like a bad memory two images appeared in my head. One of a girl no older than fifteen, her eyes closed and Jasper keeping a close watch on her. The second image was of a kid, his eyes red, I remembered the look on his face as I tore him too pieces.

But it was not my memory, it was Seth's.

A deep feeling of unease crept up on me. Now I remember. Riley was Victoria's stand in mate and Bree was the name of the girl who had surrendered but according to the Cullen's had been killed by the Volturi after we left.

"Fred...where are you from?" I asked

"Seattle, Washington. I chose this area because my family lived in Priddis when I was little, than we moved to America."

Seattle? Riley? Bree? A large group of vampires? Fuck! He was from that newborn army, he just had to be. But how? I don't remember him at the battle; we killed all the vampires except for Bree. We made sure no one got away.

"Fred...why did this woman turn you?"

"I was a pawn, we all were, I and a few others figured it out but the others were too dumb. Riley told us we had to fight another clan of vampires. He said Seattle was their territory and they were going to kill us so they could have the blood all too themselves. I knew it was a croc but what else could I do you know? One day he told us we were going to bring the fight to them and he trained us to fight. Well not me, he gave me a wide berth like the others. I knew he favored me because of my gift but I didn't want special treatment, I just wanted to be left alone. The day of the fight he told us the planet would be in a special alignment with the sun that would last for a few days so we would not be fried. As we headed out for the battle I took Bree aside. I told her I was leaving, I knew Riley was lying to us, but the others were too consumed by blood lust too think right. I wanted to take her with me."

He took a deep breath

"Sorry, forgot to breath. Anyway like I said earlier my power kept the others from ever messing with me. See things were brutal, people were fighting and killing one another over stupid things and Riley had to constantly bring in new bodies. My power kept me safe. Bree was the only one who got close but it was only to keep herself safe. I grew to like her though. She wasn't like the others; she was one of the tamer kids like me. She never got into fights, she didn't hang out with Raoul or Kristie, and she didn't take pleasure in killing whether it was humans or the others. She just wanted to be left alone, like me."

"So what happened?" I asked.

"Well there had been another vampire called Diego. He and Riley were tight. He helped clean up the messes the others made. Bree got close to him. Diego was one of the tame kids too, he was an okay guy. Bree and he got close, I figure it was when they were gone for a day, and we figured they got fried. I was sad at the thought. We never talked but it made me happy to know someone in that hell hole had some sanity. But they showed back up and the next day Diego never came back. Riley said he was on reconnaissance with _her_. The one who made us. He said he would be at the fight waiting for us. Me and Bree lagged behind and I told her I was leaving, wasn't my fight, I was dragged in you know. She told me how that day they were gone they found out about the sparkly thing. That confirmed my suspicions about Riley so I thought to hell with him. But I wanted to bring her with me, we got a little closer those final days while Riley trained the others. She wanted to find Diego. I told her to meet me in Riley park up here, I told her I would wait a day than if she and him showed up we could travel together, she warned me there were some creepy vampires in black that policed our kind and apparently we had all been made illegally. That was little more than a year ago. I haven't seen or heard from them."

"Have you been waiting for them all this time?" I asked. I was feeling bad for this guy. If only he knew.

"Yeah. I am sure they are dead. But I guess I still hope you know? Bree was the closest thing I had to a friend as a vampire. She was a good girl, she shouldn't have been drawn in to all that stuff. I just hope she and Diego are somewhere out there happy and okay."

Fuck. What should I do? Should I tell him the truth? Damn it why do I have to be stuck with the vampire with a major issues.

"Leah, are you okay?" Fred asked.

"Huh?"

"You were thinking really hard," he said.

"Fred...I think there is something you should know...those vampires that Riley wanted you to fight...they were the vampires my pack made a treaty with. They were the ones Riley wanted you to fight."

He got still, I swear his power got stronger, I found myself disgusted too be close to him and I wasn't even looking at him.

"How do you know that?" his voice had gone all quiet and cautious.

"First there are some things you need to know. The vampire that made you was named Victoria. Three years ago they came to Forks and met the Cullens. One of them, Edward had a human girlfriend called Bella. James was Victoria's mate, he was a psycho hunter and he decided to hunt Bella for sport, the fact the Cullens were going to protect her. They killed him and Victoria decided to do the whole eye for an eye thing or in this case a mate for a mate. The only reason she made you and the others was so she could have an army to wipe out the Cullens and Bella."

Fred got up and began to pace again. "I knew it! I knew it was more than making a coven!"

"There is more. Those vampires Bree warned you about are called the Volturi. They are the oldest and most powerful coven in the world. They keep you guys in line, make sure you guys stay hidden from the humans and everything. They knew something was going down in Seattle. Victoria kept herself hidden from you all not just too keep her safe from the Cullen's but from them. She was going to let them kill you all for her and she didn't want you to tell them about her so they wouldn't kill her as well."

"Please tell me she is dead."

"She is, Riley too. Edward killed her and my brother killed Riley."

"Your brother?"

"Yes, see like I said we protect humans and if those newborns came to Forks it would be a blood bath. Plus we had to protect Bella too so we joined forces with the Cullens to...kill the newborns."

"Oh god...Bree."

"But we didn't kill her," I said quickly.

"What?"

"See she gave up, she surrendered to the Cullens, they decided to spare her, I think they planned on showing her their way."

"So she is alive?" he asked sounding happy.

"Well...no."

"But you just said-"

"I didn't see what happened next, we had to leave before the Volturi showed up and one of my friends had been hurt. The Cullens wanted to spare her but the Volturi wouldn't have it. That is what they are like, zero mercy...the Cullens couldn't do anything to help her...I am sorry."

Fred let out a roar of rage and put his whole fist right through my wall. I got up but then fell to the ground. I could not move. I felt such a powerful wave of revulsion. I could not move. I wanted to run away, I wanted to get as far away from him as I could but the revulsion was too strong. It kept me where I was.

"Fred...please...stop..." I tried to say.

Than it was gone. I got up and saw I was alone.

"Leah!"

Matthew came running down the stairs. "Leah what wrong? Where Fred-Fred?" he asked.

I looked at the wall that had a hand shaped fist in it. "He is a little angry right now."

* * *

We didn't see Fred for three days.

There was nothing in the paper or on the news about any more disappearances. I was kind of hoping he had left for good but three days later he showed up.

I and Matthew were watching the never ending story. Matthew loved that movie. "I am wishing Falcore was real Leah, flying would be so much fun!" he said excitedly.

Then there was a knock on the door. I didn't hear anyone approach and thought I had been watching the movie too closely too have noticed. I got up thinking it was one of the neighbor ladies. Ever since they found out I was a single mom they had tried to take me under their wing. Like I needed support.

I opened the door and found an apologetic looking Fred standing on my doorstep. "Hi," he said.

"Hi," I said back.

"Um..."

I suddenly found myself unable to look at him.

"I wanted to apologize for my behavior when I was here last," he said. "I let my anger over ride my rational thought and I disrespected you in your own house. I am sorry."

"It's okay. I mean you just learned the truth and that can be a bit of a bitch...you want to come in?" I asked.

"May I?"

"Sure."

He walked past me and I gagged. "Oh sorry, that happens when I am nervous," he said.

"It's okay; just don't get close to me."

Matthew looked up when he heard us walk in. "Fred-Fred!" he said excitedly.

He got up and ran over but before he even touched Fred he jumped back and gagged. "Sorry," Fred said looking sheepish.

"It's okay Fred-Fred."

"Please call me Fred."

"Fred-Fred."

"No, Fred."

"Fred-Fred."

"No, it's Fred."

"Fred-Fred."

"Just go with it, I am the only one he doesn't have a nick name for," I said seeing the annoyed look on Fred's face.

"Me have nick name for Leah, but she not let me call her it, but me love her so me not call her it because it make her sad."

"Then can you call me Fred? It makes me sad when you call me Fred-Fred."

"No it doesn't, it irritates you, me know, me see it."

Fed sighed and I laughed. He watched the rest of the movie with us. "I loved this when I was a kid. I miss the old graphics they used, now they use all this CGI stuff and it doesn't seem as real," Fred said.

After the movie Matthew went upstairs to go potty leaving me and Fred alone.

"So, you still want to try this deal?" I asked him.

"Of course, if I can do anything too reclaim me humanity I am all for it...thank you for telling me Leah. All this time...I figured she was dead, but I guess a small part of me hoped she was out there. But I am glad I know the truth. I can move on now you know, I finally got some closure."

"I know what needing closure is like. Listen, I think you should meet the Cullen's."

"What? Why?" he asked.

"Look they can teach you more about this veggie vamp lifestyle than I can."

"Veggie vamp?"

"It's a little joke of theirs. Look don't worry, they don't hold grudges. They know you and the others were being used by Victoria. Plus seeing how you ran instead of fought I know they will be more than happy to help you."

"I don't know."

"Fred, the Cullen's are some of the most kind and caring people you will ever meet. Trust me, they can help you."

"Well, if you think they can help. Sure."

"Great. I will give them a call. Who knows...maybe they can tell you more about Bree's final moment. Edward, he can hear thoughts so maybe he can tell you what her final thoughts were about."

The repulsion went down a lot and I was able to look at him. He was smiling, he looked really good when he smiled. "Thank you Leah, you are a really kind woman."

"Been a long time since someone called me that."

He placed a hand on mine. "It is true Leah, you have helped me in ways you can't understand. I wish I could repay you."

"Just keep too the animals okay. I would hate to have to kill you after all this. Oh and one more thing." I grabbed his hand and twisted it. "Next time you touch me without my permission I will rip you're hand off, got it?"

"Yes ma'am!" he said.

"Good."

I let him go and Matthew came back down stairs.

Fred pulled out a deck of cards and he began too show Matthew some card tricks. I went into the kitchen and grabbed the phone. I had some calls I had too make.

 

 

**Fusedtwilight: I had already written this chapter by the time the Guide came out so if any of you who have read it and notice any inaccuracies with Fred's history that is why.  Will the Cullen's be able to give Fred the answers he needs? Please review.**


	14. Chapter 14

Focused Madness

Chapter 14

 

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki.**

 

Fred P.O.V

"Bye, bye Fred-Fred," Matthew said giving me a hug.

"Take care bud," I said.

"You will come back promise?" he asked.

"Promise," I said.

It was the day after I came back. After Leah told me what happened with Bree I quickly left. All that hell we had gone through, it was only so some crazy bitch could avenge her mate, and poor Bree paid the ultimate price for Diego.

I was so mad; I knew I had to leave before I did something I would later regret. I spent the next three days cooling off. I cried a little, of course there were no tears. I haven't been able to cry since I was turned but when it felt like I should be crying my eyes burned. I figured it was a vampire thing. I was just grateful I didn't cry blood like the vampires from those Anne Rice books.

All those people who died, not just Bree but the others. Sure they were violent and dumber than a box of rocks but they were just pawns too. We all were, that bitch Victoria was going to let these Volturi people kill us.

How could Riley be so stupid? Did she not see she was using him? All of us?

All that violence and fear was for nothing. Was it not for my power I would be dead too probably. Those three days in the woods I felt so alone.

I was the survivor of a madwoman's nightmare. The only one left alive to bear the burden of what had happened. For the rest of my immortal life I would live with those days with the others. A private hell no one else could share with me.

What's worse is I should have taken her with me; I should have dragged her kicking and screaming. But I saw the determination in her eyes; I knew I could not stop her from going to him. But still I curse myself a fool for not trying to stop her.

I returned to apologize to Leah. I feared she would chase after me so I kept my power up in case. But we had a nice talk and I spent time with her and Matthew. While I taught him some card tricks I knew I heard Leah talking to these Cullens about me.

She talked to someone called Carlisle and he sounded pleased at the idea of meeting me.

The next day I was getting ready to leave and they were seeing me off.

"Good luck," Leah said.

"Thank you Leah, I owe you so much," I said.

She shrugged. "It was nothing. The Cullens can tell you more about your kind than I can."

I held out my hand and she took it. I was amazed by how hot she was. I could feel the heat coming off her skin by just being close to her. She was a very good looking girl despite her smell. Back when I was human I would not be able to look at a girl like her. I was the shy quiet type and the thought of me even talking to a beautiful lady made me ill.

Becoming a vampire did give me some back bone, that and the having to watch my back from a bunch of psychotic vampires.

"Be careful too, I have some friends down around the Quileute rez, it's called La Push so don't go anywhere near there," she said.

"I won't. I take it you would rather I not me reveal your location?" I asked.

"Not a soul. But remember, Edward can hear your thoughts, Jasper can sense and manipulate your emotions, Alice can see the future, Bella is immune to vamp powers and her daughter Nessie can show you her memories and thoughts with a touch."

"Would this Bella be immune to my power?" I asked.

"Well only vampire powers that attack the mind are useless against her…so, maybe, I am not sure how your power works. If it is just mental stuff it won't work."

"Good to know in case something goes wrong," I said.

"The Cullens aren't going to hurt you unless you hurt them," she said.

"Sorry, the only type of vampires I know about are the kind who want to kill me."

"No worry Fred-Fred, Cullens will help you become tame" Matthew said. "Tell them alls Matthew is missing them and being good."

"I will," I said.

I turned and headed for America, back to Washington. Once again throwing myself into the life of vampires, driven by the thirst for knowledge and understanding of myself and my nature. Hoping these people can give me back what Riley and Victoria stole from me, my life and my humanity.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

Fred vanished leaving me and Matthew to our solitude.

"Will Fred-Fred be back?" Matthew asked.

"Sure, he just needs some answers is all," I said.

We walked back inside and I went to the kitchen and called the Cullens to tell them Fred was on his way.

"Hello Leah," Edward's smooth voice answered.

"He is on his way," I said.

"Hi Ed-Ed!" Matthew said loud enough for Edward to hear.

He chuckled. "Hello Matthew."

"Sorry for sending him your way, but he needs some help. After that shit Victoria started I figured he needs some good vampires to learn from," I said.

"Why Leah, that is the first time you have ever referred to us in a positive light," Edward said sounding amazed.

"Screw you leech," I said.

"Easy come, easy go," he sighed.

"Look out for his power, he is strong, made me so repulsed I couldn't move," I said.

"I know, poor Bree told me that much before she died. I am glad I can finally meet this man. I hope wherever she is she can rest knowing he will be taken care of."

"I hope he can succeed with the veggie vamp. He seems to really want to change his ways, but I have enough on my platter with Matthew to deal with a fledgling vampire."

"No problem Leah, you have gone above and beyond for us, this is the smallest of concessions we can offer for you," he said.

"Daddy, ask how Matthew is doing!" I heard Nessie say in the background.

"Me want to talk to Nessie," Matthew said.

I handed the phone to Matthew and he walked around the room waving his arms around as he talked to Nessie about Fred. I could hear her squealing on the other end, excited about the new guest on his way

I watched as he waved his arms around like the kid he was as he talked about how cool Fred was and how tall he was. She told him how everyone was doing and how much everyone missed him.

I smiled as I watched him talk to her; he talked so fast it was hard to catch what he was saying.

I was happy how happy he was. I know he had been missing the others since we got here. I know how he felt; I miss Seth and mom so much.

I miss the rez, I miss everyone. I miss the rain, I miss the cliffs, I miss the sound of the ocean, I miss running with the others on patrol.

All this time I wanted out, now I want back in.

* * *

Fred P.O.V

I ran for four hours, only stopping to eat a deer I found on the way. As I made my way further south the weather began to change, becoming colder and wetter. I knew I was getting close.

I was really nervous. Usually I have to work to keep my power off but I didn't even try now. I just left it on automatic in case this meeting went south.

Leah may have painted a pretty picture of these Cullen's but I would rather be safe then sorry. For all I know they might decide to finish the job. I could not believe that a bunch of vampires could be that civil. Maybe it was my vamp instincts, maybe it was the time I spent with the other newborns, maybe it was just me being me and being afraid to meet new people.

Either way I did not bother to keep my power off.

I wanted to be ready, first sign of hostilities I was gone.

I had always been like that, from what fuzzy human memories I can recall I had been a scrawny little runt. The kind who is an easy target for the bullies. I never looked for trouble, it found me. No matter how hard I tried to avoid them people chose me to pick on.

Even in high school when I hit puberty and all those wonderful hormones gave me my wonderful growth spurt I was still the number one bully target. I never fought back. Never. In the movies the geek decides to stand up for himself and what he believes in and fights his tormentor and saves the day.

I never had the balls to fight. It just wasn't me. So I did the next best thing, since I could not be stronger than my tormentors I could be faster. Track helped with that. I wasn't into sports but I did love to run. Running made me feel free, invincible, untouchable. It helped keep me ahead of those jerks who thought it was fun to hunt me.

I never did a lot of things as a teenager. Most kids went to the movies, the roller rink, the arcade. I never went out much. I was the more, stay at home and study kind of kid. In other words I was a geek.

I studied and studied and studied some more, forsaking as much human contact as I could. My parents were the quiet and dull kind. I never regretted that, I was glad they were like me. Quiet, reserved, kept to themselves. We may have been boring, but we were happy and safe.

I do miss my parents. We did some fun things together. Camping, saw a few movies, going to church. Dull but perfect. God what I would have give to return to that. Quiet, boring, dull. My old life.

I wonder what mom and dad did when they could not find me? Did they think me dead? A victim of some insane murder? Well, they would be half right.

The only good thing about this life was the speed and the power. I could finally run away from it all, and I could make it so no one would come near me if I wished.

But is that what I had to look forward to? An eternity of wondering the world alone? What kind of life was this? I could turn someone I suppose, make a companion to help ease the loneliness. But I could not put someone through the fire of the venom, the pain of an immortal life.

I hope to God these people can help me. As a human I wanted to be alone, it was an idea that made me happy. But as a vampire it terrified me.

I caught the scent of an unknown vampire. It led deeper into Washington so I followed it. Soon more scents joined it, some were female, others male. It was as if they were leading me to them.

I remember Leah telling me one of them can see the future, maybe she saw me coming and decided to have them leave me a trail.

Soon I could see them. As I ran, following their scents I dodged the trees and as I moved I could see them far in the distance waiting for me.

There were five of them. I knew it was them, first they were dressed too nice to be just any wild vampire, second and most obvious they had yellow eyes. I figured out who was who from what Leah told me.

The blonde man with a kind smile must be Carlisle, the woman next to him with the rounded belly must be his wife Esme, the tall bronze haired one must be Edward, the second blonde with the scars must be Jasper. I was instantly wary of him, something about him, his scars. It screamed danger. I would not let him out of my sight.

The short pixie like girl next to him must be his wife Alice.

I noticed none of them were looking at me. Some looked to my side, some looked a little above me. No matter where they looked though they were not looking at me.

"Greetings Fred, my name is Carlisle Cullen," the first blonde said. I was right in my guess.

"Hello," I said politely.

"We are happy you came. Leah told us you seek enlightenment and knowledge," Carlisle said.

"I wish to know more about us. What we are, where we come from...and about Bree if you would," I said.

I saw the woman I guessed to be Esme get a sad look on her face. "We would be happy to tell you about her, but I am afraid-"

"I know she died...but I want to know anyway...I need to know...she was my...I guess we were friends," I said.

"She thought of you in the end," the tall bronze haired one said. "She requested that should we encounter you again we treat you with kindness."

"You must be Edward," I said.

"I am. In her final moments Bree thought of you Fred. She felt bad you would be alone in this world, ignorant to how dangerous our world really is. We would have spared her; we would have welcomed her into our family. But as it turns out..." he trailed off.

"I know some coven called the Volturi killed her, Leah told me that."

"Tell me Fred? Have you fed?" Carlisle asked.

"Yes, I had a deer on the way over," I said.

"We thought we could hunt before we head back. It would do us well, help us cut the cake so to speak," Esme spoke.

"Sure. Sounds nice," I said.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

"Leah look what I can do!"

I looked up from my paper. Matthew stood in front of me. He was in only his shorts. He liked that. If he could help it he only wore a pair of shorts around the house. He always went barefoot unless we left the house together which was rare. With his tan skin, dark hair and habit for half-nakedness I was terribly reminded of the guys.

He leaned forward, placing both hands on the ground. Than he kicked his legs into the air, standing on only his hands. Then he pulled his left arm back so only his right kept him from falling, than to my amazement he dug his finger into the floor and soon was using his index finger to balance himself.

He looked at me and smiled. "Isn't it cool Leah?" he asked.

I smiled and clapped. "Very cool."

"Now watch this." he bent his elbow and pushed his arm forward, he flew in the air and landed on his feet. "Ta da's," he said.

I clapped some more. "That was amazing Matthew," I said.

"Matthew is practicing to make fun. Matthew see it on TV and wants to try it so he does. Can you do's that Leah?" he asked.

"Not with just one finger," I said.

It was true back in the old days the guys liked to show off their wolf agility and reflex's in human form. Me being a girl of course I was more flexible than them. I could do more cartwheels and summer salts than they could a fact I loved to rub in their faces.

Thinking of them made a pain of sadness run through me.

Matthew frowned and ran forward and jumped on my lap. He wrapped his arms around my neck, hugging me. "Don't be sad Leah," he said.

"I'm not sad," I said wrapping my arms around his middle.

"Lire. Me see you sad, what make you sad?"

"I'm missing my friends back home," I said.

"You mean Jake-Jake, Quil-Quil, Seth-Seth and Bry-Bry?" he asked.

Bry-Bry was his nickname for Embry. Since Em-Em was Emmett's name he decided to call embry Bry-Bry, much to his dissatisfaction.

"Yes, I also miss my home La Push. I miss the people who live there, I miss my mom Sue," I said.

"Leah...what is your mommy being like?" he asked.

I smiled. "I look a bit like her. My dad used to say I get my strength and stubbornness from her. We butt heads a lot, especially when I was growing up, but we love each other more than anything," I said.

It was true. I and my mom fought a lot when I hit my teen years. Poor dad was tuck in the middle of us, trying to be the peace keeper.

But no matter how hard we fought when the chips came down we were there for one another. When I had my first period it was mom who got me my necessities and explained how they worked and what was happening to me. When Sam and I first went out it was mom who listened to me talk for hours how cool and smart and funny he was. When Sam dumped me it was her who held me as I cried myself to sleep.

"Your daddy, what is he being like?" Matthew asked.

"He is gone," I said.

"You mean he is being dead?" he asked.

"Yeah. He was great though. Seth takes after him a lot. Dad was always making us laugh with his jokes and his silly antics. He was so kind and caring, the kind of guy who could listen to the sorrows of the world and never get tired of hearing about it."

"What happen?"

"Well when me and Seth first turned into wolves my dad saw us. He was having heart problems, he was an old man. He was a bit older than my mom and when he saw us phase...his heart had it's last shock."

He said nothing at first, he got this far away look in his face.

"Matthew killed his mommy too."

"What? Matthew I am sure she is alive," I lied. I already knew from Carlisle Matthew thought his mom might be alive. No one had the cruel intention of correcting him.

"I am not stupid Leah. Every time I mention mommy people get sad and change the subject. I know I killed her, I ripped my way out of her!"

He got up and went to the other end of the couch and sulked. He grabbed a pillow and gripped it tight, his mouth was firm in angry lines and his eyes blazed.

"Matthew, did you remember something?" I asked quietly.

"Maybe," he muttered.

I sighed. I reached for him and pulled him into my arms. I remember mom did this to Seth when he was young and would throw a hissy fit. It worked for Seth so I hoped it would work for him.

He didn't fight me, he still held on to his pillow and leaned into my embrace. "Matthew talk to me. Did you remember your mother?"

"...Yes. Before we left me remember some things about daddy and sisters. Me remember mommy. Me killed her so bad."

His voice broke and I could smell the salty smell of tears.

"It's not your fault Matthew," I said.

"But me killed her," he said.

"Matthew do you think Bella had an easy time carrying Nessie? She almost died giving birth to her."

"Really?" he asked.

"Yes. Bella was human at the time and everyday she would accidentally be hurt by her, every time Nessie kicked she would break her ribs, Bella had to drink blood herself as a human because Nessie was draining her of hers."

"What happened?"

"Well when it was time for Nessie to be born they had to cut open Bella's stomach to save her. Edward turned her into a vampire after they got her out to save her life and she almost didn't make it."

"Mommy," he whimpered.

"Matthew, it was not your fault. Hybrids like you and Nessie can't have a normal safe pregnancy, vampires aren't about life."

He turned to look at me, his sweet brown eyes filled with tears. "But why? Why would daddy let her suffer like that? What about Rosemary's mother? Seraphina's mother? All the mothers of my sisters? Why did daddy let them die? Why didn't he save them like Ed-Ed saved Bell-Bell?"

I knew the answer to that. The answer was Joham didn't give a damn about those poor women he used. They were just a means to an end as a way to make his master race. But Matthew didn't know that, he still thought his dad was the greatest. How can I tell him the truth? How can I tell him his father wasn't as great as he thought?

The answer for that was simple. I could not.

"I am sure he had his reasons. Maybe they had too great injuries for him to heal. The point is that your mother loved you enough to carry you to term, just like Nahuel's mother, just like Bella. Even when everyone tried to convince them they should kill their babies to save their lives they refused. That's what mothers do; they put their own lives before the lives of their children. She may have died painfully, but the love and hope she had for you overshadowed that and gave her the strength to give birth to you. All because she loved you."

He dropped the pillow and hugged me tight, He buried his head in the crook of my neck and I could feel his tears falling down my neck.

"I mi-miss my m-m-mo-mommy," he cried.

"I know, that's good though. You will always miss her because you love her and we miss the people we love when they are gone."

"Do you miss your daddy?" he asked.

"Every second of every day. Especially when I am afraid or uncertain. But I know that no matter where he is he is watching over me, keeping an eye out for me. Because even in death a parent looks after their children."

"Is mommy in heaven? Car-Car says good people go to heaven."

"Yes, she is in heaven now."

We sat there for a while, me holding him, him holding on to me. Both of us sharing the pain of losing a parent, both of us sharing the pain of losing a family, both of us sharing the pain of the knowledge we killed someone we loved.

"Leah, are we a family now?" he asked.

"Of course," I said.

* * *

Fred P.O.V

I sat in Carlisle's office, looking at an age old portrait of the Volturi leaders. It was a beautiful piece; the artist had done a very good job capturing their inhuman beauty.

I had met all the Cullens now, Nessie was quick to ask me how Matthew was. She even showed me some images of her and him playing.

I had been talking to Carlisle for a few hours now, learning everything about our history, our biology, our culture, what little there was. I learned much from him, there was more to vampires than I thought.

I learned more about Bree's killers, the Volturi. I learned the rules and laws they made, I learned about each and every member and each power they possessed. I learned the names of the ones who killed her.

I learned of the other vampire covens, the Denali coven, the Irish coven, the Egyptian, the Amazon and many of the nomads who lived in this world.

I learned of the southern vampire wars and the genocide of the immortal children and the children of the moon.

So many things I learned, so many things I would have never guessed. I learned of Carlisle's personal history and the history of his family. I learned of the treaty he made with Leah's fellow wolves and the exact circumstance of her and Matthew leaving.

"So it turned out that Emily, her cousin and her ex's imprint slash fiancé was Matthew's siren and he almost killed her and now she is in hiding so he doesn't find them and kill Matthew?" I asked.

"Yes, we would be happy to hide him ourselves but due to the fact Jacob is imprinted on Nessie and he is the alpha of the other pack Leah does not want him to have to chose so she took it upon herself to take him and flee," he said.

I was really impressed with Leah. I already got the feeling she was a strong independent woman but I had no idea she had the strength to do such a thing. To run from one's home and life for the sake of another takes a lot of guts.

"Poor Leah, and Matthew. It's like life keeps on throwing him through a loop. First the Volturi kill his family and leave him amnesiac and crazy, than he meets you all and he has to flee for his life. At least he has Leah to take care of him," I said.

"I like to think there is a reason for everything. After all if they hadn't fled they wouldn't have met you and sent you our way," he said with a smile.

I smiled back. "Thank you sir. I know this is bad blood between us-"

"Call me Carlisle," he said, "and there is no bad blood between us Fred. Victoria is dead, her vengeance died with her. You were wise to leave the fight before it started. Though I think your gift may have made it difficult to fight you."

I had lowered my shield down so they could look at me better, but I didn't turn it all the way off. Old habits die hard.

"I am glad you bear no grudge against me for being made by her. I wish I hadn't been the only one that survived though," I said thinking of Bree.

"Yes, Bree would have made a fine addition to our coven. She showed remarkable restraint for a newborn, but once the Volturi make a decision for something they are impossible to stop."

"I understand, I don't think Bree would want you to get yourselves killed over her," I said.

"I think you will fit in well with our lifestyle Fred. You seem to be rather tame yourself despite your upbringing."

"I have always been the quiet, boring kind. I guess the venom made that strong as well," I said.

"Well while you are here you are more than welcome to share our home. In fact I believe Alice is already getting you some new clothes."

"That is not necessary," I said.

"Yes well when it comes to Alice and clothes it is best to just nod and say yes," he said with a humorous smile.

I smiled back and we continued to talk. It had been a long time since I talked with someone like Carlisle. We both had a love for knowledge. We talked about everything from biology, to history, to mathematics even. I was amazed at how cultured and refined he was.

I expected vampires to be nothing but blood thirsty and violent. But I had seen the darker side of vampire life. The Cullens were quickly proving themselves to be surprisingly human despite what was in their nature.

As we talked my thoughts once again turned to Bree. I was immensely touched she had thought of me in her final moments of life. That she asked these people to be kind to me if they ever met me, made me wish she could have lived. She would have fit in well with them.

I don't know anything about her past. But I figured she like the rest came from a bad back ground. I had moved to Seattle to go to College, having left my parents back in Canada to study in America.

It had been by chance I met Riley. I was walking on campus grounds, trying to figure out what to do. My roommate had a girl over and wanted some private time with her. I decided to take a walk to kill the time. It was a nice night out and I figured I should enjoy it.

I remember I took a seat on a bench under a street light. I stretched my limbs and spotted two people in the shadows, I could not see what they looked like, but they were close enough I could tell one was a girl and one was a boy. And I could tell they were looking right at me.

"Hello?" I called.

"Him?" the voice belonging to the male asked.

"He will do," the female said.

The male stepped forward into the light. That was the first time I met Riley. I remember how good looking he was, even for a kid. He looked like he was about my age, a college kid. I remembered how pale he was and how red his eyes were.

"What do you want?" I asked standing up. I was taller than he was by four inches.

Suddenly he was right in front of me, he was ten feet away and than in the blink of an eye he was right in front of me. I was so startled I fell back on the bench. He smelled me and his eyes darkened slightly.

"He smells really good," he said.

"Yes, he does. If we are lucky he will be special," the female said. She was still to far outside of the light for me to see.

"Please, can I try?" the man asked.

"No Riley, you are to young," the female said firmly.

Her voice was very girly. It reminded me of the blonde bubble gum cheerleaders at my old school.

"But his blood is soo-"

"Riley!" the female hissed.

Riley's teeth were bared at me and it was like he was fighting some deep inner battle.

"Right, sorry."

He backed away from me; his once red eyes were now black.

"Who are you people?" I asked.

I quickly looked around, seeing the biggest gaps between me and them, calculating the best routes to hide and run.

"You should go feed. I got him," the female said.

Riley blurred and was in front of the female "Sorry, his blood is the best I have smelled yet," he said.

I heard the sound like rocks tapping against one another. "It's okay, your still young. His blood appeals to me to, I hope I can stop. But it is good his blood smells good. It's a sign he might be gifted."

"Gifted? Really?" Riley sounded excited.

"Yes. Finally, after all the times I turned those other ones I finally get someone who might be useful."

"I am useful," Riley said sounding resentful.

"I didn't mean you." the strange rock hitting rock sound could be heard again. "You have done well Riley, no go treat yourself. I can handle him."

"Alright, you going to take him back to your place?"

"Yes, come back in three days to collect him."

Once again I heard the strange sound and Riley vanished. The woman leaned down and picked something up. "Now, lets get started shall we?"

The sound of something slicing through the air could be heard. At first I thought it was a bullet, than I realized it was the rock she had bent down to grab. Glass smashed and rained from the lamp post. Soon darkness enveloped me. I got up to run but something slammed into me, sending me back onto the bench.

Than I felt something sharp latch onto my neck. I tried to scream but she put her hand over my mouth. Her hand was hard and cold. A powerful burning sensation began to creep from my neck where she bit me.

I began to feel drowsy and the burning continued to spread, growing in intensity. I expected light to appear to illuminate her face. I expected there to be light because I felt like I was on fire, but there was no fire. Just darkness.

She got off me and I heard her sigh. "Damn thats good blood. You better be special or I will regret not finishing you off."

I can't remember to much of what happened after that. The only memory I had between the burning was of hearing the woman telling Riley he had to get me out now. She couldn't stand having me around her. Something about me disgusted her and she didn't want me anywhere near her.

That was the last thing I remember. The next thing was Riley dragging me through the woods. My throat burned, my senses seemed sharper.

"What?" I asked.

"Our maker has asked me to take you to base a little early. Something about you unsettles her," Riley said. He did not look at me as I talked.

"Maker?" I asked.

"Yes. You are a vampire now. Welcome to the family kid."

He stopped dragging me and led me to where the other newborns were hiding. As we walked he told me I was chosen to fight. He told me that sunlight would kill us like in the stories, he told me I would have to be careful not to be killed by the others. He told me a lot of things, many of them lies.

He introduced me to the other newborns. I remember the fear I felt when I saw so many vampires in such a small place. I remember the aggression and the snarls some of them gave me.

As soon as Riley left they began to circle around me, like sharks when they circle an injured fish. The semi-circle had a noticeable gap in the circle, like there were two opposing sides in the house. The two groups snarled and hissed at one another, dislike and deadly rage clear in their eyes. I fought the urge to bear my teeth and hiss at them all, fearing it would set them all on me. They wanted to kill one another fine by me.

Then Raoul and Kristie stepped forward from their groups. They told me I had a choice. Join one of them or die. It was that simple. You were either with Raoul or Kristie, there was no in-between.

I remember wishing they would all leave me alone, wishing they would all just go away and to my surprise they all stopped looking at me, many had disgusted looks on their faces like they saw something they didn't like. I heard hissing and growling, many had backed away from their groups, their eyes on the ground or to their leaders, wondering what was wrong.

"You know what, you take him Kristie," Raoul said.

"To hell with you, you take him, he's a freak," Kristie said.

No one ever bothered me much, there were times I saw someone heading for me or thought I felt someones gaze and I would wish them to go away and then they would get this look on their face and go away.

I could hear them talking about me, heard them whisper something was odd about me, unnatural, (that was a given) different. I heard them say how they could not look at me. In time as many were killed in little arguments or petty fights between the two groups new vampires were introduced. In time I learned to control this odd power I possessed, in time I learned to make it so strong no one dared look at me.

Soon the newborns began to think I was so ugly I could not be looked at. No one corrected them, what did it matter what others thought of me.

I remember when I first met Bree. She had been such a small little thing, she had just had her arm ripped off and had come running over in my direction for her life and her missing limb. I saw her make the face the others made when they got close but the desire to live helped her ignore it. As Jen came over to finish the job I pumped up the power on my gift and Jen would come nowhere near me.

Bree reattached her arm and stayed right where she was. I saw her glance at me, then quickly look away. She said nothing, I said nothing. Maybe she thought I did not notice her, maybe she thought I didn't care.

What Bree never knew was I always watched her. I didn't mind her much like the others. She was tamer compared to them, she never started fights or joined Raoul or Kristie. Riley learned what they did and made it clear that they were to kill no more newborns who didn't join them. Of course that didn't stop deaths from happening but now they happened less.

I always watched her though; she was still a vampire and could hurt me. I always watched her, and she never knew. Soon she realized no one came near me and started making it a regular practice to stay by me at all times. I knew it was unpleasant for her, but the desire to live kept the unpleasant feelings at bay.

After a while she would bring books she got from her nights out. I always wondered every time she left if she would return. Without my power to protect her how would she defend herself if one of the others decided to kill her? But I always felt releaf whenever she came back. While she was gone I would leave the books she left behind and found myself impressed by her taste in books.

I did not love her, she was to young for my tastes. But she was the closest thing I had to a friend in a long time.

"Fred?" Carlisle asked.

"Sorry, lost in thought," I said.

"I was saying what do you plan on doing with your life?" he asked.

"Well, not a whole lot I can do," I said.

"You can return to college. You are a bit older than the others so passing you off as a high schooler might be tricky, but if you return to college I am sure in a few years you can do it," he said.

"Then what? It's not like I can get a real job or anything," I said.

"I am a doctor, sometimes the others get jobs working at the human society or some other small job. I know Esme has worked at flower shops a few times."

"Well, I guess it would be nice to do something to kill time now that I am immortal," I said.

"You could stay with us. Or you could go live with our cousins in Denali. They just added a new member to their group not too long ago. They would be happy to have you. Plus Eleazar has the power to see our abilities; he might be able to help you learn more about it what you are capable of."

"Thanks, but I would prefer to be by myself for now. No offense, I just need some time to myself is all. I have always been a private person."

"I understand. You are welcome in our home any time Fred."

"Thank you Carlisle."

* * *

Leah P.O.V

I was painting my toe nails when I heard a loud bang from upstairs.

"Shit!" I cursed.

I ran upstairs expecting to find anything but Matthew in the spare bedroom moving things around.

"Matthew what are you doing?" I asked.

Matthew was carrying the bed on his back, trying to get it through the door. "Me is taking bed out," he said.

"I see that, but why?" I asked.

"Me is getting Fred-Fred's room ready."

"Fred's room?" I asked.

"Yes, for when he comes back and lives with us."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," I said waving my arms, "who said anything about Fred living with us?" I asked.

"He said he would come back. He promised," Matthew said.

"Matthew I am sure he meant to visit not live with us," I said.

He dropped the bed and it hit the ground with a loud woomph. "But Leah where will Fred-Fred live?"

"He is a vampire Matthew, a lot of them prefer to live alone."

"But how can we make sure he will keep eating animals if we don't keep an eye on him? "he asked.

"He is not our responsibility Matthew," I said, trying to sound firm.

"Well it will be his guest room for when he visits."

"What will he use it for?"

"To stays in, duh."

"Matthew," I sighed.

"Please Leah, imagine how happys it makes him when he see what we dos for him. He be surpriseds we did this for hims," he said.

I could see that determined look in his eyes and I knew I was not going to be able to stop him from doing this. So I sighed.

"Fine but let's keep the bed, just because he doesn't sleep doesn't mean he can't lay on it. Later we'll go shopping for stuff to decorate this place. How does that sound?"

"Greats! Can we get balloons and confetti and posters and cakes and-"

"Easy. Let's not go overboard."

* * *

Two months later

Fred P.O.V

I was leaving the Cullen's today.

The last two months I spent with them had been the most enjoyable of my undead life. My eyes were now yellow, I looked better with yellow eyes than red.

I had grown to trust them to the point I actually hugged them or shook their hands as I prepared to return to Priddis. I had already called to let Leah and Matthew know I was returning.

"Take care now Fred," Esme said as she hugged me.

"I will Esme," I said.

"Take care bro," Emmett said slamming his knuckles against mine.

Jacob shook my hand next. I met him a few days after I had arrived. He was weary of me at first but we got to know one another. He asked about Leah a lot, I could tell he was worried about her.

He handed me a stack of envelopes bound by string. "Can you give these to her? They are from her friends and family on the rez," he said.

I took them and put them in the pocket of my jacket. "I will."

We shook hands and I turned to Carlisle. "Thank you so much for everything sir- I mean Carlisle," I said.

I had gotten real close with Edward, Jasper and Carlisle. Jasper and Edward were like me. Quiet, thoughtful. Carlisle and I had a passion for learning, he became a teacher to me more than just about the ways of vampires. He helped me continue my education.

I liked Emmett well enough but he was a little too loud and boisterous for my liking.

Alice handed me my traveling bag which had all the clothes she had gotten me.

"It was our pleasure Fred. Don't be a stranger, visit us as much as you can," Carlisle said.

"I will, I will tell Leah you all said hi."

They waved good bye as I ran off. I had a new suit, new hair, which I could only style, not cut. New shoes, new clothes, new eyes. I could not wait to see the look on Leah and Matthew's face when they saw me.

I was full of hope now. Hope that I could live some semblance of a human life, like the Cullens.

" _I am doing it Bree. I am getting my humanity back. I wish you could be here to, but I know you are in a better place. Thank you for being a friend to me, thank you for asking them to be nice to me. I promise I will live for the both of us."_

My eyes slightly burned as I ran. I blinked and welcomed the burn. I thought my life was over, that I would be nothing more than a lonely blood sucker, doomed to live on the outskirts of civilization, preying on poor unfortunate humans.

I was wrong.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

"Thanks for coming over Deccan," I said as I sat at the table.

"No problem," Deccan said.

Deccan was the son of one of my neighbors. He worked as a plumber and was under my sink fixing a leak.

"I tried it myself but I am not good at fixing sinks, or pipes, or drains. Plus I got a friend coming to visit so I wanted to get this fixed before he showed up."

He pulled his head out from the sink to look at me, his eyes filled with surprise and a little disappointment. "He?"

"Yes. His name is Fred, he is coming to visit," I said.

"Oh, visit, that's nice," he said.

I knew he was happier than he let on that Fred was just visiting. He seemed to be in a more cheerful mood after that.

"So, Leah. I was wondering since you been in Priddis for a while and after your friend leaves and all...maybe you would like to, maybe have a few drinks together."

Was Deccan asking me out? He was good looking enough. He was two years younger than me, was five foot eleven with dirty blonde hair and deep blue eyes. He was good looking. He was well fit. As he lay on his back his shirt rode up, giving me a good view of his abb's.

"Well...I would have to think about it. I have to find someone to babysit Matthew."

He quickly came out from under the sink. "I can get my sister to babysit, she needs the money," he said eagerly.

I smiled, finding humor in his eagerness. "I will think about it."

Just then the phone rang. "Oh damn, I will be right back." I got up and walked out of the kitchen to go answer it. Leaving Deccan alone.

* * *

Matthew P.O.V

Me wait for Leah to leave room to answer the phone thing.

When she gone and talking on phone me strike. Me being silent so Deccan person not hear my come up upon him. I grab his foot and pull him out and he slid on the ground.

"What the-"

I jumped on his chest and put my hand over his mouth. "You are shutting up now!" I hissed at him.

Me focus power on him. Making him prone to suggestion, making him listen to reason.

"You do not want Leah, she is a friend, nothing mores. You will fix pipes and be on way. Leah does not interest you in that ways, she is off limits to you. You will not mention this to her at all, in fact when me leaves room you will forget this happened. But you will remember my words and you will follow them. Understand?"

He nodded, his eyes gone vacant. Me feel power wrapping around him, in him. Me get off him and quickly left before Leah return. Me leave room just in time because me hear Leah come back in room.

Me know if Leah is knowing what I did she would be mad at me's, but me's not like liking this guy coming here with his dark pink feelings for Leah. Only man allowed to feel dark pink feelings for her was big brother Nahuel. Me see him and Leah are being attracted to one another, big brother Nahuel only one allowed to think dark pink for her.

This not being the first time me have to make men back off from Leah. Not first time me use power to make them go away. Leah not know, or suspect, me can tell that much. But if she is ever finding out than me is being in much trouble.

But it for best. Leah not needing bunch of men sniffing around her. She have me and I being all she need.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

"Sorry about that, my friend is on his way and should be here in a few hours," I said walking back into the kitchen.

Deccan was laying on the ground a vacant look in his eyes. "Deccan?" I asked.

He shook his head and blinked. "Oh sorry, must have dozed off."

He got up and rubbed his hands on his shirt. "Well the good news is I fixed your sink. Any thing else needs fixing give me a call."

"Thanks, hey about those drinks."

"Forget about them," he said.

"What?" I asked confused. He seemed to enjoy the idea of us getting drinks so much.

"I changed my mind. I don't think I could even get the time."

"Oh...okay," I shrugged.

"Well have a nice day Leah," he said shaking my hand and giving me a smile. He grabbed his box and I saw him out.

I closed the door and rubbed my head. What was it with the guys around here? One moment they act like they want to go out with me the next they don't. It's like...

"MATTHEW!" I screamed.

* * *

Three hours later and Matthew sat on the couch, flinching at the glare I was giving him.

"You are sooooo grounded," I said.

"Sorry Leah, but they be-"

"Yes I know, they be thinking dark pink which means lust but that does not give you the right to go and mess with other peoples minds with your power we talked about this."

There was a knock on the door. "Fred-Fred!" Matthew screamed.

"Matthew get back here!" I said as he ran to the door.

I heard him open the door and greet Fred. I sighed and went stomping to the door. I turned the corner and stopped. There was Fred. And he looked fine. I mean before he was tall, light and handsome. But now he was in fresh new clothes and had nice golden eyes.

He held Matthew in his arms, like a father does when he comes home after a long day at work.

"Hello Leah, it is good to see you again," he said smiling at me.

Suddenly I wasn't so upset Matthew kept all those other men away.

 

**Fusedtwilight: Ohhh, is Leah feeling something for freaky Fred? So now he is back, what have things been like since he has been gone and will he decide to stay with Leah and Matthew? Also poor Matthew has another memory of his past...and it WILL not be pleasant.**


	15. Chapter 15

Focused Madness

Chapter 15

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my betaanimegirlkiki for betaing. Last chapter Fred returns after a month with the Cullen's. He learns both their ways and what happened to poor Bree. Meanwhile Matthew does his best to keep men away from Leah and now they all talk about what happened in the month and Matthew has a memory of his mother.**

 

Remembrance: _The state of bearing in mind, an act of recalling to mind, a memory of a person thing or event._

Example: Fred, Leah and Matthew all have remembrances of the past.

Leah P.O.V

"So let me get this straight. While I was gone Matthew ate your neighbor's dog?" Fred asked.

We were all sitting in the living room and I was telling Fred what Matthew had done while he had been gone.

"Yeah. I come into the living room and see him wearing this collar and I ask him where he got it from and he said he found it on a dog he snacked on. Then there is a knock on the door and it is one of the ladies and she asks me if I have seen her dog and she hands me a flier with a picture of it and I see he is wearing the exact same collar that Matthew is wearing."

I smiled recalling the incident.

"So she is all crying and saying how she hopes he is okay and her kids will be devastated if she can't find him, they have had him for years and I am all comforting on the outside but on the inside I am like 'Crap!' so I promise her I will keep an eye out and I come back in and look at the collar Matthew is wearing and it has the same address as what is on the flier and I am thinking 'My god he ate Killer.'"

"Killer?"

"That was the name of the dog, he was a rottweiler."

"He came wondering around while Leah was inside the shower and me was hungry. No one told Matthew he is not allowed to have dog," Matthew said shrugging his shoulders.

"So what happened? With the family I mean?"

"Well eventually they gave up and got their kids a new puppy. I swear I can't look any of them in the eye now. I always feel so bad you know, I mean how do you look your neighbor in the eye when your kid ate their dog."

Fred gave me an odd look when I called Matthew my kid. It no longer bothered me to say it, I have been calling him my son for so long now and taken care of him, so well the line between lie and truth was slowly becoming blurred.

"Matthew kept the collar, it real nice," Matthew said.

"So what was it like going yellow?" I asked Fred.

"It took a while, I had been drinking human blood for so long, and trying animal blood was like...being used to meat then going straight to a veggie diet. It makes the burning go away but it doesn't fully satisfy."

"Me know, human blood is awesome," Matthew said.

Matthew and Fred got these looks on their faces, like they were remembering a really good meal they had once. I decided quickly to change the subject.

"So how are the Cullens doing?" I asked.

Fred seemed to snap out of it, but Matthew was still off in la la land. "Oh they are doing great. Wonderful people, I still can't believe how humane they are. It's amazing; I thought all of our kind were savage. Not them."

"Believe me they have their moments," I said remembering the fight with the newborns.

"They helped me with my power as well. That Bella girl is something; my power didn't affect her at all. No matter how hard I focused on her she didn't even flinch. Want to see a cool trick?" he smirked and in an instant he was gone.

"What the hell?" I asked.

Suddenly he was back again, a huge smile plastered on his face. "Cool huh?"

"You just vanished, I didn't even feel repulsed," I said.

"That's how it works, I can make the repulsion so subtitle that every sense you posses simply refuses to know I am there. I did not move, I was still there, you just refused to see me."

"Me do that," Matthew said snapping out of it. "Watching this."

He closed his eyes and like Fred before him he vanished in thin air. I looked at Fred and he looked just as amazed as I was. I grabbed the area where he had been but I felt nothing but air.

"Fred, that power of yours doesn't stop you from being solid does it?" I asked.

"No. He just vanished, I can't detect him at all."

"Shit!" I shot up and began to look around.

"Matthew? Matthew!" I called.

I was starting to panic. Where the fuck was he? I couldn't smell him, I couldn't see him, I couldn't hear him. Hell if Fred couldn't then I sure as hell couldn't.

I was about ready to tear the house apart when a pair of small but strong arms wrapped around my waist and Matthew shouted. "Boo!"

I jumped like five feet in the air and spun around. Matthew stood there smiling. "Surprised Leah," he said.

I bent down and hugged him close to me. "Don't you ever, ever do that again Matthew, do you hear me, never again!" I said firmly.

"Me sorry Leah, me wanted to show you my new trick."

Fred walked over and bent down to look at Matthew. "How did you do that Matthew?"

"Matthew is seeing Fred-Fred do it. Me radiate same amount of repulsion and it easy. Me become disappeared like Fred-Fred."

"Can he copy every vampire power?" Fred asked.

"No, the vampires called him a psychic-lens. Eleazar from the coven in Denali has a gift for figuring out how vampire powers works says Matthew can manipulate mental energy. It's what lets him see, sense and manipulate emotions. But he can also use it to intensify vampire powers."

"Yes, I remember Carlisle telling me about that," Fred said.

We looked at one another as we spoke. I could not help but check him out while we were so close. I have seen many good looking vampires in my day, but Fred really took the cake. I stared at his eyes. It seemed like only yesterday they were red, now they are yellow.

He came to me in worn down clothes, wild dirty hair, and a raggedy appearance. Now here he was looking sharp in fresh brand new cloths looking fine as hell. He should be in college, at some fraternity taking some pledge and studying to be a someone. Not in some backwoods little hamlet stuck for eternity as a blood sucking vampire.

He should be meeting a nice girl, marrying her and having two point five kids, a nice house and a white picket fence and maybe a dog to top it off. But he would never have that. Sure he could find some human chick and turn her or some available vampire woman and create a few other vamp's to make a little coven/family.

"Yeah he said he could increase a vampires powers times twelve. When the Cullen's first started looking after him his power leaked out and started causing all their strongest personalities and powers to hay wire." that was putting it lightly.

"Man, to think such a kid can be so powerful. Can he mess with Bella?"

"No, not unless she drops her shield and lets him," I said.

"Is there anything you can't do Matt-Matt?" Fred asked.

Matthew's smile fell a little. "Me not remember."

I frowned. Before I could inquire more about what he meant he grabbed my and Fred's arms and dragged us upstairs.

"Come Fred-Fred, we show you your room."

"My room?" he asked.

"Yes well we kind of set you up a room for when you visit," I said.

He got a surprised look on his face. "Wow, really?"

"It was Matthew's idea," I said.

Matthew dragged us into Fred's room. I had bought some new drapes for the window, we kept the bed, I figured even a vampire needs to lie down once in a while. There was a T.V and a small desk for him to sit at. I also added a few pictures to put on the wall, simple photos of random things.

"What you think Fred-Fred?" Matthew asked.

Fred examined the room. I couldn't tell if he was impressed or not, Fred was good at hiding his emotions.

"If you want to add a few things that's cool, I wasn't sure what you would want," I said.

"Thanks, I really appreciate it," he said.

I could not read him real well; I could tell he really did appreciate the room. Fred probably just didn't want to get all gushy about it. Some people just don't wear their emotions on their sleeves.

"Can we go hunting tonight?" Matthew asked excitedly.

"Sounds like fun to me," Fred said.

"Sure, we have to wait for dark though," I said.

"Hey Matt-Matt, why don't you go find us something to watch on the T.V, we'll be right down," Fred said.

"Okay."

Matthew walked out and left me and Fred alone. I thought he was going to tell me this was all too much. "Thanks Leah, I really appreciate this," he said.

"I was worried you were going to be freaked out or something," I said.

He shook his head. "No, this is great. Makes me feel like I belong. Listen, I had another reason for getting rid of Matthew." he reached into his coat and took out a stack of envelops. I knew from the smell that was almost hidden by his scent it was letters from the others in La Push.

"Before I left your friend Jake gave me these to give to you. I figured you might want to read them in private or something."

My hands shook slightly when I took the letters. Names were on the letters. Seth, mom, Jake, Embry, Quil, Billy, Charlie, Emily...Sam...

I gripped the letters and smiled at him. "Thanks. Let's go see what Matthew found." I turned and headed for the living room downstairs. If Fred noticed what those fucking letters did to me he wisely kept his silence.

Being around Fred was easy enough, he was the strong silent type, and lord knows I need plenty of those in my life. The boys in the pack were all loud, obnoxious, rude, and could be downright pricks at times. But Fred despite looking like he should be a typical loud, obnoxious man was very quiet and reserved. He reminded me of Jasper or Edward. Only less of an emo.

He keeps it up I think I will definitely enjoy having him for a friend.

We watched a few movies and talked with Fred more about his experience with the Cullens.

I learned there was a bit of an incident with him and the wolves. See Sam found out Fred knew where I was and came over to the Cullens demanding to know where I was. When Fred refused to talk Sam continued to press the issue and tried backing him into a corner until Fred used his power to send him running.

On one hand I was glad he was feeling better to be a dick, on the other I was annoyed he was still doing this. Something told me reading his letter wasn't going to improve me attitude towards him either.

The letters were in the kitchen in one of the drawers. I don't know why everyone wrote letters, I still call home every once in a while and talk to them.

We had gone hunting when night hit. I merely watched as Matthew and Fred hunted some deer. Things got really creepy when Matthew went running up a tree and came down carrying two chipmunks in this hands. "Look Leah, num, nums." before I could stop him he bit the head of the one chipmunk and squeezed the blood into his mouth.

Before he could finish off the other I made him drop it and let it go. It ran away as fast as it's little legs could carry it.

"Come back here!" Matthew said going to chase after it.

"Matthew let it go," I said.

"But Leah."

"No buts, if you are going to eat something it is going to be something bigger to fill you up," I said firmly.

"Okay," he pouted.

After that we played hide and seek. Between Fred and Matthew it was an interesting game. Fred would use his power to hide but Matthew always found him.

After a few hours of playing in the woods we returned home and I got Matthew ready for bed. He took a bath and I and Fred were tucking him in.

"Good night Matthew," I said.

I kissed him on the head and he smiled at me warmly. "Night Leah, night Fred-Fred," he said.

"Good night Matt-Matt," Fred said.

"Fred-Fred will you stay with us?" Matthew asked.

Fred got an uncertain look on his face. "I don't know Matthew," he said.

"Please, me and Leah really like having you here, it's being lots of fun. We could use a friend."

"We'll talk about it later Matthew." I kissed him on the head again.

"Leah...if me have nightmares again..."

"Then call me and I will come," I said.

He nodded and closed his eyes. We left his room and I closed the door, but left it open just a crack so some light could filter through. Fred and I walked downstairs in silence.

We sat down in the living room and there was an awkward silence. "So can I get you anything?" I asked.

"No, I am fine...so why is Matthew like the way he is? Is it a birth defect?"

"No. See, did the Cullens tell you about the incident with the Volturi?"

"A little."

"Well while they were getting ready Alice and Jasper found Nahuel who is another hybrid. He told the Volturi all about hybrids and his father Joham. Joham found out about hybrids and was trying to make his own little super-race. They left but made it clear they would be visiting Joham. Months later we found Matthew. From what we have pieced together Joham created a whole family of hybrids, the Volturi came for them and during the commotion Jane found Matthew and his sister Rosemary. She used her power on Matthew and he lashed out with his power causing both Jane's and Rosemary's power increase and that is what made him what he is today."

"What was Rosemary's power?"

"I guess she could manipulate memories. She was going to go into hiding with Matthew as Joham planed in case the Volturi ever came after them. She was in the middle of wiping Matthew's mind when Jane showed up. That's why all he can remember is pain, Rosemary wiped his memories and Jane filled it with pain. I have never been on the receiving end of her power but from what I understand it is like having a fire burning in your body. I can't imagine what it would be like increased by twelve."

"Rosemary must not have totally erased his mind. I mean if he can still remember bits and pieces."

"That's what worries me sometimes."

"What do you mean?"

"See Joham was training his kids to believe they were gods, that humans were only good for a snack. What happens when Matthew starts remembering his time with his daddy?"

Fred said nothing at first; he had a thoughtful look on his face. "You are afraid he will remember what his father taught him and he will become more like a wild vampire?"

"Yes. You haven't seen what he is capable of Fred. See him and I left because he attacked my cousin Emily who is Sam's imprint. You know Sam?"

"Yes, he was very insistent I tell him where you are. He seemed really worried."

"Well Emily is his imprint."

"Like Jake and Nessie?" he asked.

"Yeah. Well we were all having a friendly game of wolf versus vampire when Matthew caught her scent and we found out she was his siren."

"Her blood called to him," he said his eyes growing wide.

"Carlisle taught you well I see. Yeah, her blood called to him. He attacked her, she got away but Sam became hellbent on Matthew's death. I fought him to protect Matthew and I wound up hurting him real bad. I decided I needed to run with Matthew. If the Cullens kept him then they would have to leave and I didn't want Jake to be separated from Ness."

"You could have given him to the other coven. The Denali coven," he said.

He had me there.

"If I may say Leah, I think you did it because you love him."

"Excuse me?" I said.

"I mean, I think that you grew to love Matthew you could not bear to see him hurt. You are a lot more affectionate with him now then what I saw two months ago." he looked at the scar on my arm, the one where Matthew bit me. "You have no reason what so ever to care but you still do. Why?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. I was more than ready to kill him when I first met him. He was chasing my brother Seth around trying to eat him. Thought he was a simple plain wolf and was going to suck him dry."

Fred laughed. "sorry I got this image of this great big wolf running around in circles with Matthew chasing after him snapping his teeth."

We laughed at that image.

"He just latched on to me, more than any of the Cullens, I don't know why."

"Maybe it is because he saw you naked."

I glared at him.

"Emmett told me, sorry. Did he really ask you why you didn't have a penis?" Fred asked unable to hold back a smile.

I rolled my eyes, wishing Emmett was here to slap him. "Yes, he seemed to think I should see a doctor to treat a medical condition."

Fred laughed harder. He had a real warm laugh. His face seemed even more beautiful lit up with humor.

I hated feeling like this around him. It was like I was hyper aware of everything about him now. It was like what I felt with Nahuel, only less about lust. I did not want to feel like this around him, he was a stranger and he was a vampire. At least Nahuel had been a little human. A little human, but all man, I still think about him from time to time. Still think of that wonderful one night we spent together.

"You shouldn't worry about him regaining his memories Leah. I think there is a reason he chose you, or you chose him. I think you were meant to care for him."

"If you start saying it is because of destiny I swear to Christ I will rip your legs off," I threatened.

"Well think about it. What are the odds that a she-wolf would form a parental relationship with a hybrid that has a mental instability and was going to be raised by his tyrant father who was killed by a coven sent to kill him? What are the odds Leah. As long as you fill his head with happy memories I think even if he remembers his past it won't matter because he will be filled with your love."

My heart felt fluttery right then. "Thanks for the words of confidence," I said.

"I am serious Leah. He loves you, fill him with your love and make him a better person than what his father wanted."

"Ironic I can't have my own kids and now here I am looking after some asshole's kid." I shut my eyes and cursed myself for my stupidity.

"What do you mean?" Fred asked looking concerned.

"Shit, I didn't mean to say that. See ever since I became a wolf...I haven't had my menstrual cycle. I can't have kids. Yet another reason for me to hate being a wolf."

"The other being your dad and Sam right?" Fred asked.

"Who the fuck told you that!" I snarled.

"Umm, well your brother told me about your dad. He's a good kid and he told me why Sam was so eager to find you, because he still loved you."

Anger began to course through my body. I can't believe that little shit went and told a fucking vampire our history! My history!

"Leah I am sorry, I didn't mean to pry, I was just curious," Fred said.

He must be feeling nervous because I found myself unable to look at him. I clenched my fists and closed my eyes and began to count back from ten. I practiced my yoga breathing and tried to keep calm.

"It's not you, Seth should know better than to be blabbing to people about our personal shit, my personal shit!"

I continued to use my breathing exorcises and it worked. I opened my eyes and looked at Fred, but quickly looked away. "Sorry, us wolves have some real anger issues," I said.

"So I noticed. I swear that Sam guy was going to try and attack me."

"Sorry, he can be a real dick when he sets his mind on something," I said.

"Not your fault. Besides I made him go away without even touching him."

I smiled. "I would have loved to see him run away, I know you must have hurt his pride," I said.

He shrugged.

"So Fred, I was thinking about what Matthew said. About you living here...I was wondering if you would like to move in."

The look on his face was priceless. "What?"

"Look, I have a ton of money right now, but it won't last forever. The day will come when I need to get a job to support him and me. But I can't leave him alone Fred, you see what he is like. I can't hire someone to babysit. He could flip out and bite them and that would be a disaster. So I was thinking, you are still new to this lifestyle, being around people might help you adapt to it more. If you had someone to help you out and look after you and in return you could look after Matthew for me."

"You want me to be a babysitter?" he asked.

"Look I wish I could say that I am just doing this to help you out, but the truth is I can't do this alone Fred. If he was just a regular hybrid sure I could handle him, but I can't, you have only seen a fraction of what he can do, when he attacked Emily he made us all paralyzed with fear. If Bella hadn't been there we would have been helpless to watch him kill her. Matthew likes you, and if he gets out of hand you can use your power on him to keep him in line, I can also trust you to protect him in case a vampire finds him."

"Or if Sam and his pack."

"Exactly. Plus it has been nice talking to you Fred. I try and keep to myself here you know, it gets kind of lonely. I have Matthew but sometimes it's nice to talk to an adult. Think of it as an arrangement, you help look after my house and Matthew and we will help you follow your diet and give you a place to stay. Unless you want to live in the wild."

Fred got a thoughtful look on his face. "Well, I could use the companionship. I also do owe you for helping me. Plus the little guy does need some male influence in his life."

My brow twitched. "Male influence? What you think a woman can't raise a kid by herself without a man around the house?" I asked feeling irritated now.

"What? No, no, I just think it is better for a woman to have help raising a son is all. Just like I think a man needs help raising a daughter."

Son of a bitch. I stood up and glared at him; I put my hands on my hips and did the best impersonation of mom when she was mad at dad. "Listen here buddy the only reason I ask is because he is a hybrid with a freaking powerful gift, now had he been a normal kid I wouldn't be asking you this question so don't be thinking I couldn't raise him. And another thing, telling a woman she can't raise a boy because she isn't a boy herself is pretty fucked up; there are plenty of women who didn't need a man to raise their son. So far I have done a fucking amazing job considering the circumstances, and don't you think it is a little sexist to be saying a man can only raise his son and a woman can raise her daughter? I will have you know my dad took me fishing and hunting plenty of times and I gutted my share of animals."

I suddenly found myself unable to look at him.

"And stop doing that! For god's sake can't you have an argument without hiding behind your power?"

"I don't like fighting," was all I heard him say.

"Look are you in or are you out?" I asked.

"I'll think about it."

The spot where he had been was gone. I knew he was no longer here because I could look in the empty space where he had been and I heard the sound of the door quickly opening and closing.

"Great, way to go Leah scare off the only friend you had," I said to myself.

I got up and went into the kitchen. I reached into the drawer and pulled out the letters he brought me. Now that I am alone I might as well read them.

* * *

_Matthew's dream_

_Does the world grow smaller? Or do I grow bigger?_

_Everyday I ask myself this question. Once it seemed so vast, now I can feel it all around me, so tight all I have to do is reach out and touch it._

_I have to be careful though. If I push too hard my world hurts, I feel it's pain in colors of blacks and whites. I love my world and I try not to move, but day after day it gets harder and harder._

_My world is a alive, I know it. I hear a constant beating sound. I fall asleep to that sound. It is so wonderful and beautiful._

_I hear things outside my world. I know that there is something beyond the warmth and the dark. Another world maybe. Sometimes I think if I push hard enough I can see this other world but I do not want to hurt my world._

_My world loves me a lot to. Even when I cause it pain it loves me. There are times I sense something on the other side touching my world, making these motions and I hear my world make a soothing sound._

_My world talks, I can hear it. My universe speaks with a beautiful voice. I can hear other voices to sometimes. Some are like my world, but there is one whose voice is deeper. The world likes him a lot, I can sense it. When the world is near him it lights up with soft pink colors._

_The world calls him Joham._

_The other voices all taste similar to one another and this Joham. Like they were related somehow or in some way I could not understand._

_I sense his fondness for my world. His color not soft pink like worlds, he does not love world like world loves him. He feels some affection for her though._

_I sense others to, the other girly voices. They have no affection for my world, they all feel indifference for my world. They have much love for this Joham though. They call him father and he loves them a bit more then the world._

_As I grow bigger my world grows worried. I hear her talking to Joham about taking me out soon. I do not know if I want to go. The world may be dark but it is so warm. A bit tighter then it was a while ago._

_I would rather stay but if I am hurting the world I will leave. Who knows the world outside the world might be fun._

_I hear voices talking now. It is feeding time and I am happy._

" _Here you go Adora," a voice I recognized as one called Serephina said._

" _Thank you Serephina," my world said._

_I felt the world move and soon I felt my body grow strong through the link I had to the word. That part of my that grew into it, or it into me._

_The world had a strange mix of pleasure and disgust of drinking this blood stuff. I don't know why, I enjoyed it._

" _Thank you Serephina. Will Joham be here soon?" my world asked. My world was called Adora, but she will always be my world. I like the word Adora though, it sounds pretty._

_I hear Serephina sigh in annoyance. She is annoyed by the world, I do not like Serephina. She is not colorful as some of the others or my world. I do not like her. There was something about her, something so hot it was cold._

" _Father will be here soon."_

" _Good, I am so nervous. I hope everything will be fine, I can't wait to be a mommy" the world says._

" _Everything will be fine."_

" _Okay," the world says, sounding uncertain. The world knew Serephina was not being honest, the world had a feeling Serephina did not care._

_The world could see things, I know this. The world was very good at telling what the others were feeling. I wonder why she could not tell this Joham did not feel as attached to her as she was to him?_

_I knew Serephina was lying, lying and she was completely apathetic about it. Something bad could happen to the world and Serephina could care less. I do not like her, I want her to go away._

_Me focus on Serephina and the lights that come from her and me imagine her going away._

" _Serephina, whats wrong?" the world asks confused._

" _I can't...I have to go."_

_I felt Serephina leave. "Why did she leave?" another female voice asked._

" _What happened?"_

_Some of the other voices asked. They were confused why Serephina left, not knowing I made her leave._

_I felt Joham appear. When I was smaller I could only sense the world and it's lights, then as time went on and the others touched what separated me and them I could sense their lights. Then I could sense them from a distance like I could now. I have to wonder how my sight will improve when I leave the world._

_I like Joham, he likes me a lot. He is always touching the world a lot and I feel his love and affection for me. He talks to me sometimes, whispering things I do not understand, like how he has so many plans for me, how I will make him so proud, how I will be so beautiful._

_I cannot help but love him back, he may not love the world like he loves me, but he still loves me and I like love. Love is a pretty fun thing to feel._

" _What happened? Why did Serephina run?" Joham asks._

" _It was the baby Joham," the world says._

" _How do you know Adora?" Joham asks._

_I feel the world touch the wall that separates me from the outside. Love and affection radiated from her, lighting up the dark with pink._

" _I know, I can't explain it but whenever I get sad or worried...I feel him in me, I feel him reaching out and making the doubts and fears go away. I feel like he can feel the world already, like he can already sense all of you. Sometimes I feel something flow out of me and into other people. It happened just know with Serephina, I think he made her go away."_

_I could feel Joham grow excited as she talked, hope and eagerness increased in him as well as pride._

_I feel him come close and touch the wall. I feel how could he is, unlike the others who are warm he is cold. He whispers again. "That's my boy."_

_I try and touch the wall gently, try and get an idea what he feels like. I touch the walls and feel him pressed against it. I feel his joy as he feels me touch him._

" _He likes you Joham, I know it," the world says._

_Joham pulls back as do I. "How do you know it's a boy?" he asks._

" _Just this feeling. I hope it is a boy, I know how much you want a son."_

" _Whether you give me a son or daughter I am more than happy to add another to my family, as are all his sisters."_

_Sisters? What is a sister? Is that what the others are to me? Sisters?_

_They were excited, I could sense it. Were they excited to meet me?_

" _Tell me again Joham, how will this work?" the world asks._

" _I told you love, first we will sedate you. Then I will preform a c-section on you and remove the child. Once it-"_

" _He," the world corrects with a light chastising tone._

_Joham chuckles, a streak of amusement runs over him. "Once he is removed I will sew you back up."_

" _Can't you turn me then? I can't wait to be like you," the world says._

" _No love, you will be too weak from the operation. We must give your body time to recover so it can be strong enough to survive the transformation."_

_Joham was lying. But about what? I don't understand these things. What is transformation? What is C-section? I hear these words so much but I have no idea what they are meaning. Why would he lie about this transformation?_

" _Oh Joham, you have always taken care of me, even when I was a child you always looked after me. Remember when I got lost in the city and you led me home? My parents never believed me about you, they thought I had an imaginary friend."_

" _You have come a far way since then, you have become a truly beautiful woman Adora, I cannot begin to tell you how much I love you for this."_

_The world feels more soft pink for Joham now. "I love you Joham, soon Matthew will be born and then we can all be together as a family."_

_Matthew? What is a Matthew?_

" _Matthew?" Joham asks._

" _Our son's name. It means gift of Yahweh. It was also the name of the raven that helped guide Daniel," the world says._

" _Gift of Yahweh? Are you calling me god?" Joham chuckles._

" _Oh you and your ego," the world chides slightly. "No, you are my angel. God sent me you and our son, he has blessed me so well, soon we will be a family forever. You, me, Matthew and all his sisters. Poor boy, growing up surrounded by girls."_

_I felt one of the colors draw close. "Do not worry Adora, we will do our best not to spoil him."_

" _Or dress him up," said another._

" _Or style his hair," said another._

" _Or give him to many hugs and kisses," said another._

_Love and affection was so strong right now. Soft pink filled my world, both inside and out. I could not help what I did next, there was so much love and I had to embrace it. I moved my arms and legs and stretched them out, I wanted to embrace the soft pink, I wanted to pull it all in and keep it for my world so even when I was gone the love would remain with her._

_But I stretched too much._

_Soon the love was covered in a shower of blacks and whites. I heard something go SNAP and the world was filled with love and pain._

" _Aghhhh...Jo-Johaaaam," the world said._

_Joham was filled with worry then. I felt him touch the world. "What is it? Whats wrong?"_

" _The baby...I think he felt all the love...oh God my ribs."_

" _We need to do this now."_

_I felt the world move, it caused her some pain but she stopped. She was in the position she was in when she sleeps. I could feel everyone moving around the world._

" _Joham...we will be together forever, right?" the world asked._

" _Of course love." Joham...he is lying...why is he lying? Why won't him and the world be together forever?_

_I felt the world begin to become tired. "Joham...Matthew...our...sweet boy...together...forever."_

_The world fell asleep._

" _Is she under Hypnia?" Joham asked._

" _Yes father," the voice of Hypnia said.._

" _Good, lets continue then." a tinge of regret ran through Joham. I felt him close to my world. I felt him touching her above me. "Thank you Adora, you have no idea what you have given me, my only regret is you will not be able to live to see what he will do for the world. Goodbye."_

_Goodbye? What is going on? Why is he feeling regret? Why is he talking like he will never see the world again? What is going on? I do not want to go._

" _Father, maybe we should keep her alive, if he is as powerful as you think-"_

" _No Rosemary, she is unnecessary. A means to an end, nothing more, nothing less. I did not need any of the others to raise you and your sisters and I won't need her. Besides, as long as I have you it will be easy to control him. I can simply take away what I don't like and fill it with what pleases me. Now, let's continue. I am sure we are all anxious to meet our newest addition."_

_A streak of excitement ran through them all. They were so eager to meet me, but I did not care. I was not going anywhere, they could not make me leave._

" _One thing I am thankful for is modern technology. Once was a time I would just leave them to fend for themselves until look them up a few years later. But with modern medicine I can make the process less painful for both. Remember, enjoying another's pain is a primitive and crude emotion. For the sacrifice the mortal women make it is only right we offer them a quick and painless end. They may be our inferiors, but their sacrifice makes it all possible."_

_What are these words? What are their meanings? I am scared, I do not want to leave, if I leave something bad will happen, I can sense it. I have to stay; I have to protect my word. I felt Joham press something small and cold against the wall. Then light appeared. Not like the light I normally see, this is pure white, more harsh._

_I could faintly see odd shapes that could only be Joham and my sisters. I saw Joham reach inside and grab my blanket and rip it. When he ripped it I could see him and the others better. Pride and love radiated from him, but I did not care, he was trying to steal me from my world._

_He grabbed the link that connected me to the word and ripped it. Severing my tie to the world. I was scared now, if I left now what would happen to the world?_

" _Hello Matthew, welcome to the world," Joham said._

_No, this is my world, my world is not his world! Someone, help me! World, Adora...mommy?_

* * *

Matthew P.O.V

Me wake up screaming now.

"Mommy!" me scream.

The door flew open and Leah comes running in, worry and confusion radiating off her. "Matthew?" she asked confused.

"My world is gone, my world is gone!" Me is screaming scream.

Me grabbed my side table and hurled it at the wall. Me grabbed my pillow and easily tear it to shreds. Me snarl and Me growl, Me am very angry now. My world is gone, my mommy is gone. Why didn't daddy protect her? Why didn't daddy save her like he said he would?

Me continued to demolish the room. Rage flowed through me and the world began to grow hazy.

"Matthew stop!" Leah ordered.

She take a step towards me but me snarl at her and she stops. Me punch holes through wall, me break pictures on wall. But then wave of revulsion hits Matthew.

"Fred!" me hear Leah shout.

Me fall to floor, to repulsed to move. Me see Fred-Fred standing next to Leah, both of them full of shock and some fear. "I heard the ruckus and came to see what happened," Fred-Fred said.

"I don't know, he woke up screaming about his...of shit he remembered his mom," Leah said.

Me curl in ball and begin to cry. Body shake and heart feel like it is being crushed. "Mommy," I whimpered.

"Oh Matthew." Leah walks forward and picks me up. I cling to her and continue to cry. Tears run down face and body shakes with sobs. Leah rocks me back and forth making a shushing sound.

"Mommy's dead, mommy's dead," I whimper.

"I know baby, I know. Did you have a bad dream?" she asked.

"Me...remember...me remember when me is born...daddy said he would take me out and save mommy. Why didn't he save her? Why didn't he save her like he promised he would, she trusted him?"

"Oh Matthew," Leah said.

Sorrow and regret litter her now. Fred-Fred step forward and kneel down to hug me too. Revulsion go away long ago but Matthew not move. "It's okay bud, we have you."

Matthew sniffle and hug Leah tighter. It was odd being hugged by warm Leah and cold Fred-Fred. Me feel safe though, me feel loved. That enough to make sorrow go away, for now.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

We continued to hold Matthew even as he slept. I sang him his Quileute lullabies and he soon fell asleep.

"What happened?" Fred asked.

"I was in my room getting ready to read the letters when I heard him screaming. I came in and he was thrashing around and started wrecking the place," I said.

"I have never seen him like that," Fred said looking worried.

"This is nothing, you should have seen him when he tried to kill Emily," I said.

Fred got a thoughtful look on his face. "I didn't truly understand your predicament until now. I am sorry for my earlier comment. I didn't mean to offend," he said.

"Think nothing of it. I went overboard on you, sorry, I do that a lot," I said giving him an apologetic smile.

"I have been thinking and after seeing this...if I am still welcome I would love to live with you and Matthew."

"Really?"

"Leah I was always a loner. Even as a human, I was always very private person. It helped keep me alive as a vampire, but after Bree and the others, when I was all alone, then when I met you and Matthew and lived with the Cullens, I realized how lonely I was. I think if I want to sick to this lifestyle than I need to stay in touch with people. If I stay secluded then how will I get back in touch with my own humanity when I can't even let myself be around people."

I smiled at him. "You're more than welcome. I should warn you I have a tendency of being a pain in the ass."

He smirked. "I noticed."

"Watch it," I warned.

Matthew snuggled closer to me. "Leah...mommy," he mumbled.

I looked at him a little surprised he said those words in the same sentence.

I got up and carried him to my room and laid him down on my bed. "Well, I will go clean the mess," Fred said.

"You don't have to," I said.

"Hey, I live here as well, I got to pull my weight, besides, it would be best if you didn't leave his side," Fred said.

"Thanks," I said.

"Goodnight Leah, I will see you in the morning."

He closed the door and I heard him walk away. I laid down next to Matthew and gently petted his hair. Matthew scooted closer to me. "Mommy," he whispered.

I kissed his cheek. "I am here," I whispered.

 

**Fusedtwilight: Awww, poor Matthew. Next chapter the peace starts to break, and the new coven/pack face grave danger. Please review.**


	16. Chapter 16

Focused Madness

Chapter 16

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing**

 

 

 

connected: joined or linked together, related by blood or marriage, having elements connected together.

Example: Leah reads the letters to connect with her friends and family.

Leah P.O.V

Matthew was still asleep the next morning.

He looked so peaceful and innocent, nothing like what he looked like last night when he demolished his room.

I sat up and he did not even stir. I stretched my arms and decided since I was up I might as well read the letters. I opened my drawer and pulled them out; I was quiet, making sure not to disturb Matthew.

The first letter I read was the thickest and was from mom. I found some pictures in the envelope.

_Dear Leah,_

_Hello sweetie, I know we talk on the phone from time to time but I wanted to write to you so in case you ever need me but can't contact me you can just read this._

_We all miss you here. The house is so quiet now that you are gone; I am beginning to feel my age now that you have left. Lord knows how many more years I have before Seth leaves._

_I have been going over your baby pictures a lot, I haven't cried this much in ages. I know you didn't have time to grab any photos so I sent you some so you can look at them and remember us._

I looked at the photos. One was from the day I was born, mom was holding me and dad was leaning down right next to her. They were both looking at the camera and smiling, the happiness was so clear on their faces. Mom looked a little tired but that was to be expected, dad on the other hand looked lively and energetic.

Another was of me and dad when we went on one of our hunting trips, we were both wearing cameo clothes and we had streaks of green and black paint over our cheeks.

Another was me holding Seth when he was a baby. I had to laugh because it was the day they first brought him home. I held him in my arms and I was looking at the camera with a look that said "What the hell is this?"

I was a little jealous of Seth when I was younger; he was the baby and got more attention then I did. But I warmed up to him after a few months.

Another was of me and mom baking a cake. We were both covered in flower and laughing.

There were a few more photos, I decided to look at them later and finish the letters.

_Seth has been moping around, he really misses you. He does his best to keep a happy face; he is so much like your father. But I'm his mother; he can't hide anything from me._

_I and Charlie have been going steady. He has been around more helping me not be so lonely. He hopes you are okay as well and he sends his love, I think he will send you a letter too. Knowing Charlie it will be the shortest. You got to love a man who doesn't talk too much._

_I hope you are okay, wherever you are. When Jake told me some vampire showed up who knew where you were I was tempted to come over to the Cullen's and make him talk. Stupid I know._

_I hope where ever you are you are happy and safe. I worry every day that hybrid will flip out and bite you again._

_I know you are a grown woman now, you have fought monsters and come out the victor, but you are my daughter and no matter how old you are or what form you use you will always be my daughter and I love you._

_I hope we will see you again soon. Be safe baby and know we are thinking of you every day._

_Love, mom._

I smiled and wiped a stray tear from my eye. The next letter I read was from Charlie. I just had to see what he wrote. As mom predicted his letter was shorter.

_Hey Leah,_

_It's Charlie. I hope you are okay, everyone misses you. Hope you come back soon, your mom misses you bad. Take care and watch out for yourself._

I could almost see Charlie sitting at his desk trying to figure out to write. I moved on to Seth's letter.

_Hey sis,_

_How are you? I know we talk to one another on the phone but I wanted to write to you. Jake made Embry his beta. Since Quill spends most of his time with Claire and let's face it Embry is the more mature and smarter one. I don't mind, Embry makes a better beta anyway. He is older and wiser._

_Still haven't imprinted, I keep waiting though; all the others didn't see their imprints though so I am keeping myself on guard though. I have to wonder if I will have a controversial imprint? I mean Sam had Emily, Quil had Claire, Jake had Nessie, and the only ones who didn't have dramatic imprints were Paul and Jared._

_Can you imagine if I imprint on an older woman? Imagine the look on mom's face if I brought home an older woman. Ha, ha._

I grinned. The idea of Seth imprinting on an older woman was just too funny.

_School is still boring as usual; I do my best to juggle my homework and patrol. I still hang out with the Cullen's, my new life goal is to beat Jasper at Halo. I swear his military training gives him an unfair advantage. Just when I think I have him pinned down he snipes me._

_I have taken my permit test and I passed. Next year when I turn sixteen I will try for my driver's license. I figure since we get them early on the rez why not you know?_

_It sure is boring without you around here. The house is so quiet; it's not the same without you here. I hope Matthew is doing okay, I hope you guys have a nice place._

_Fred seems like an okay guy. Freaky power he has though, you should have seen what happened when Sam damn near attacked him. I swear Sam ran almost as fast as you when he was running from Fred._

_I hope you come back soon Leah, things aren't the same. You're the only one who can keep the pack in line. We all miss you, we all hope you come back soon._

_Be safe sis, love Seth._

The next letter was from Emily.

_Hello Leah,_

_Well I hope you are okay. I am fine; I got a little scratched up that day as did Kim and Rachel they are fine, they all say hi as well._

_Sam as you know is much better as well. We both are worried about you and hope you will return soon. You don't have to stay away Leah, the elders aren't going to punish you, and you don't have to look after the child._

_Please come back home Leah, I miss you, your mom misses you, Seth misses you, the pack misses you. La Push is your home, we are your family. We don't care about Matthew; I made Sam promise he won't go after him. You know Sam won't break a promise to me._

_We all know why you won't come, you don't want the Cullen's to have to leave and Jake to have to chose between the rez and his imprint. Hand him over to the other coven then, he isn't your responsibility, just give him to someone else to take care of and come back where you belong._

_We hope to see you soon, love Emily._

I read the others. Some were more heartfelt, some made me sigh. Paul's letter in particular irritated me; he called me an idiot and told me to get my ass home where I belong and to ditch the freak. At least he cared enough to write a note.

All my old pack members sent me a letter, Quil, Embry, Jake. All telling me how they have been, all telling me they miss me.

Finally there was only one letter left; I had saved this one for last. The letter that was from Sam.

I held it in my hands; it felt like it weighed a ton. I took a deep breath and opened the letter. I pulled the note out and began to read.

_Hello Lee-Lee_

_We have not spoken in two months and I miss you._

_We all do, we are your family, your friends. I know you must hate me a lot for what I did Leah. Believe me I took no satisfaction what so ever when we fought._

_But what was I to do Leah? Matthew is a danger. If the Volturi get their hands on him they could come back and wipe us out. Hell if any vampire got a hold of him they could wipe us out, you remember what he did to us in the field._

_He attacked my imprint what was I to do? He already came close to killing you then he comes an inch to killing my imprint. What would you have done if it was Seth or your mom?_

_It took me a few days to recover from the battle; you really did a number on me. I seriously thought I was going to die in your arms. It would have been poetic huh?_

_While you cradled me in your arms and cried my heart hurt worse then my body at the sight of your tears. I hated him more in that moment because he had hurt you by making you hurt me._

_I had the wolves in my pack search for you, for weeks I made them travel outside of Washington to try and find a trace of your scent, but then the elders ordered them back and if I had my way we would still be searching for you._

_Your mother told the elders your reason for running off, when they realized the truth in them they decided to leave you be. They don't want Jake to leave, they want him to stay here where he belongs and take over for Billy when he retires. They know if the Cullen's leave Jake may leave and they won't let that happen._

_Like I said if I had my way we would still be looking for you, I would kill that thing and drag you back home kicking and screaming._

_I can't help it Leah, I am a protector of La Push and humanity, we kill their kind. It is the natural order of things. He is a danger and he almost killed two of the most important people in my life. How else am I to feel? How else am I to react?_

_I know you do not approve, but I did what I think was right, I was trying to protect my family. So I will not apologize for what I did and I will not ask for your forgiveness, I think we both agree I have asked way to much of that of late._

_But know I bear you no grudge for what you did Leah, you are your own woman and you did what you felt was right. I just wish we did not have to come to blows, especially over a hybrid._

_Speaking of blows I came close to fighting this Fred character, it seems like Forks is becoming a mecha for leeches huh? Jacob told me of a leech that was coming to learn the Cullen's ways, he told me he had met you and you pointed him here._

_As soon as he told me I ran for the Cullen's. I did not care if I was breaking the treaty, all I knew was this guy had info on your location and I would find it._

_I found him and a few of the Cullen's a little ways into their land. I demanded he tell me where you were and he refused to tell. I came so close to phasing and attacking him, but then I felt this inexplicable wave of revulsion and I ran away. Me running away from a vampire, can you imagine that._

_I wanted to go back but every time I even thought of him I would get sick and I could not bear to be anywhere near him. The elders chewed me out good for my little stunt._

_I have promised Emily that I will not seek out the hybrid, I have sworn this to her, it took her a while to get me to say it but damn it Leah I want you back home. Where you belong._

_Jake told me Fred will be returning to where ever you are. I wish I could follow him so I can at least see you again, to know for sure you are okay, but I still am unable to think of him without being repelled._

_So I am content with just writing you this letter in hopes it will clear the air between us so you will call me and Emily next time._

_I miss you Leah, we all do. Our thoughts are filled about you and where you are and what you are doing. I hope the letters you read from everyone will convince you to drop the hybrid off and return home. La Push is your home Leah, I know you wanted to leave La Push but what life can you have with a hybrid?_

_Please Lee-Lee, if not for me then for Emily, for Seth, your mom, for everyone who wrote you a letter._

_I love you Lee-Lee, Sam._

Tears feel down my face and fell on the paper. A sob escaped my lips. I was full of nostalgia right now and I kept on thinking about Forks and the rez and everyone I missed so much.

The letters broke down the damn the held back all the emotions I have done my best to keep sealed away.

I felt Matthew get up behind me, he wrapped his arms around my neck and laid his head against my back. He said nothing, just held me as I cried. Just as I did for him last night. Just as a brother does for a sister, or a son for a mother.

* * *

"You smell that?" I asked.

We were walking out of my room. We said nothing of my crying, Matthew didn't ask. As we walked out I smelled the familiar smells of cooking fat and grease.

We went downstairs and I found Fred in my kitchen making breakfast. He smiled when saw us. "Good morning. I heard you were up so I decided to make you all something to eat."

"Thanks Fred-Fred!" Matthew said excitedly.

He ran to the table and took a seat. I walked over and took a seat as well. "I didn't know what to make so I made everything. Waffles, pancakes, sausages, eggs, toast. You name it. Hope you don't mind," he said.

"Hey, why should I complain when a man cooks for me. Who says chivalry is dead."

He smiled and got us our plates and some milk and an extra cup of orange juice. "Yay, our first breakfast as a family," Matthew said taking a bite into his toast.

I and Matthew ate while Fred cleaned up, taking our dirty dishes and putting them in the sink.

"Matthew, I have good news," I said. I looked at Fred and he nodded. "Fred has decided to stay with us."

Matthew literally jumped from his chair into Fred's arms. Matthew was laughing and giggling. "Fred-Fred is staying! This is great!"

Fred sat him down on the chair and sat down with us. "I cleaned up his room, all we have to do now is plaster the walls and get him a new set of pillows and a new set of drawers and he is good to go."

Matthew suddenly found his hands to be very interesting.

"Matthew, what did you dream of last night?" I asked.

Matthew did not speak.

Fred put his arm around Matthew's shoulder. "Come on Matt-Matt, we just want to help," he said.

Matthew's hands clenched and unclenched. "Me remember mommy. Me remember day me is being born."

"You remember that?" Fred asked.

""Nessie does too," I said. Fred looked amazed. "Even in the womb hybrids have extraordinarily advanced intellects," I said.

"I was so small, my world so big. Then over time I grew bigger and bigger. Alone in the dark and the warmth. I could hear voices outside; I used to fall asleep to the sound of the world's heart beat. Soon I grew too big for the world to hold me, I tried not to move, it was so hard not to move, but I didn't want to hurt my world."

He wiped away tears from his eyes.

"My world was called Adora. My mommy, my world, my Adora. Daddy told her it was time to remove me, he said he was going to to give her a C-section. He told mommy he would remove me then turn her into like hims. Then we be family forever...but daddy is lying, he never mean to turn her, he let her die. Why? Why did he let her dies?"

"Oh sweetie." I got up and walked around the table and wrapped my hands around him.

"I didn't want to leave, I tried to stay but he took me out...I don't understand, it not making sense, me remember mommy being broken and bloody, her eyes being filled with pain and terror, but daddy making Hypnia put her to sleeps."

"Hypnia?" I asked.

"She being sister who make people falling asleep. He name her after Hypnos god of sleep. Daddy like to name us with names that are having meaning, mommy named me, she said Matthew is meaning gift of Yahweh, she say daddy her angel and she is loving me so much." his body shook as he cried.

"Why me remember one thing then remember another? Me remember daddy pulling me out of mommy and him crying over her body, but now me remember him not caring much she die, she not die in pain at all she was asleep!"

His little fists slammed on the table and a chunk broke off. His body shook and his teeth were bared, a vicious snarl escaped his lips.

"Matthew, calm down," I said quickly.

He continued to shake, as if he was about to phase. "Matthew look at me." Fred grabbed Matthew's head and made him look at me. Matthew glared at me. It hurt to see him like this so much, but I glared back, never backing down from anything. "You need to calm down, I am sorry about your mother, I wish I had the answers but I don't. But you need to calm down now or someone might get hurt."

He glanced at the scar on my arm and closed his eyes. "Me sorry Leah," he said.

I got him a cup of milk and he drank it quietly. I picked up the bits of the table he smashed off. Fred sat with him in the living room as I cleaned up the mess. Matthew drank his chocolate milk, the only human drink he didn't mind. Matthew was quiet and I wish I had the power to read his mind.

I had been so afraid that his memories would make him revert to the mindset Joham raised him with, now I am beginning to realize that regaining his memories may make his condition worse than what it is already.

I already know why he remembers one thing and it contradict another.

Rosemary.

Matthew said she had the power to manipulate memories. What if Joham used her to manipulate Matthew? Took out his true memories and filled them with a bunch of bullshit.

What if Matthew remembers both his true memories and the fake ones? What would that do to a person? Especially one like Matthew who was already unstable?

His reaction to the memories of his mother was bad enough, who knows what any more would do to him. I cursed Joham to hell. Well he is undoubtedly in hell right now, but he sure did leave one hell of a mess for me to clean up.

I was becoming more and more thankful for Fred being here. He would definitely be a help with Matthew. Had he not been here last night when Matthew flipped out who knows what would have happened.

After I cleaned up the kitchen I sat down with Matthew and Fred on the couch. Matthew finished his milk and sat it down on the table. He leaned onto me and propped his legs up on Fred's lap. Fred glanced at Matthew but didn't say nothing. I ran my hands through his hair like I normally do when he is upset or when we are relaxing.

Despite the smell of vampire from Fred everything felt nice. It felt like any ordinary day. A family watching TV together.

That's what we were now. A family. I could not deny it, me, Matthew and now Fred were a family. All of us runaways, seeking a better life, a quiet life. A life that had no violence or drama. Our lives had been filled with enough of that, all we wanted know was peace and quiet.

"Ness-Ness birthday is coming up," Matthew said.

"That's right. Do you want to get her something special?" I asked.

"Yes."

"We'll go into the city and get her something. What do you want to get her?"

I had forgotten about Nessie's B-day coming up. It was a year today me, Seth and Jake were protecting her from Sam's pack. Now a year later I am in Canada with a hybrid and a vampire playing little house on the prairie.

Life sure can throw you a curve ball that is for damn sure.

* * *

October

Fred P.O.V

I was in the kitchen preparing the candy.

It had been little over a month since I joined Leah and Matthew and I am happy to say things have been going wonderful for us.

Matthew had no more episodes since his last. We had repaired his room and I had officially moved in. We let Lance know I was moving in so we had to pay extra rent.

Tonight we were celebrating Halloween. I was dressed as a Pirate; I had the hat, the eye patch, and the cloths with a fake plastic sword to finish it.

We would be staying home but we decided to dress for the occasion. We had been invited to a few parties but we had declined. I was still new to the whole veggie vamp and I was not comfortable being around so many humans.

Matthew came walking in. He had grown a bit in the last month; he looked like he was eight or nine now. He was dressed like Harry Potter, Leah followed him dressed as a witch.

"Ready?" I asked.

We all made our way to the living room and sat down. We had rented a bunch of scary movies to watch. It was hard to pick because so many horror movies have sex in them and we did not want to expose Matthew to that.

I sat the bowl of candy on the table. Of course the candy was for Leah and Matthew; I admit I have tried to eat human food before. I could taste all the ingredients and chemicals that made them up, but they held no appeal to me, not like they once did.

I quickly learned any food I ingest I have to regurgitate later. My stomach does not process human food; it just sits there and goes to waste so sooner or later it has to come out.

I and Leah had grown to trust one another a bit more. When ever she had to leave to go to the store she trusted me to look after Matthew. Good thing too, that kid is as curious as a cat, I had to always keep an eye on him, I could never risk letting him out of my sight, didn't want any more house pets getting lost.

Another thing I enjoyed was hunting. We would all go out and hunt animals together. Leah would let us have her catch; she didn't like eating raw meat.

I liked Priddis, it was quiet and we didn't have to worry too much about people coming to visit, we lied like a mile away from the nearest house.

I had almost forgotten what it was to be a part of a group, a family. A whole year of being alone helped me value companionship. I hoped to never return to it.

I did a lot of choirs around the house, fixing leaky pipes, taking out the garbage. Leah had made a list of things we all had to do every week. She didn't want to toss every thing on me.

Matthew had limited work. His mentality made it tough for him to wash a dish without breaking it unless he had one of us to help him.

"This is lame," Matthew said. "That is not even being real blood."

"Of course not, they are not really dying," Leah said.

"Still."

I chuckled. "Yeah, that blood doesn't even look appetizing, I don't know how these vampires can stomach it," I said.

"I wonder where humans got the idea of fangs from?" Leah asked. "I mean they got the strength, the speed, the cold skin, the drinking blood part. But they got the fangs, the coffins, the sun, the shape-shifting, all that wrong."

"Well if you are a human and you see sunlight hit a vampire and in the instant it does the vampires runs out of sight wouldn't you think they just burst into flame?" I asked.

"Yeah, I guess."

"I don't know about the fangs though, they could have just come up with that. You know how some stories get warped or twisted over the years to make them scarier."

"Believe me, you guys are scary enough," she said.

"Matthew is being scariest of all."

"Please, you are too cute to be scary," Leah said pinching his cheek.

Matthew glared at her. "Matthew is not cute, Matthew is being scary." he crossed his arms and smiled smugly at her.

"Who do you think is scarier? Me or Fred?" Leah asked.

"You," I and Matthew said at the same time.

"Hey," Leah said glaring at me.

"Well you can be rather frightful when you get mad," I said.

"Stupid, sparkly blonde vamp," she muttered.

I laughed.

Leah did have a bit of a temper, something told me her being a werewolf enhanced that trait.

But she could be very pleasant to be around. She was very level headed and very street smart. I also had to admire her will power. How many could do what she did?

It would be so easy for a vampire, there are fewer risks for us. But for Leah she had so much more to loose.

She was also a very beautiful woman. I could not help but watch her sometimes when she did not notice. The only complaint I had was her scent, but I was slowly getting used to it.

I admit, I have even had these little fantasies where I kiss her.

I would never dare do it. Leah was a very guarded girl and I know she would not like it if I did that. Not one bit.

The world wasn't so scary now. I knew everything about vampires, I knew what happened to Bree, I knew I no longer had to live in fear alone. And living with Leah and Matthew was like living with a family. We ate together, hunted together, laughed together, looked out for one another.

It was odd, a vampire, a werewolf, a hybrid, all living under the same roof.

The movie ended, it had been an old vampire flick. "What's next?" Leah asked.

I held up the next DVD. "Zombie Nazi's extreme," I said.

"Nazi's?" Matthew asked.

"Basically it's a movie about a bunch of Nazi's scientists who dig up the bodies of dead Nazi soldiers and resurrect them as zombies and try to start world war three. Kind of lame but I hear it is really graphic."

"Eh, it's Halloween," she said shrugging her shoulders. "Besides, Matthew has seen worse, right Matthew?" she looked over at Matthew.

He was holding the DVD for the movie. He held it in his lap which was littered with candy wrappers. He was staring at the cover which had a rotting zombie in an S.S uniform with the infamous symbol glaring from behind. Matthew stared at it like he was trying to make sense of it.

I hope he does not ask what a Nazi is.

"Matthew?" I asked.

"Me...me...see this before."

"When did you see Nazi zombies?" Leah asked.

"Not thems, this." he pointed to the swastika behind the zombie.

"Where did you see that?" I asked.

Matthew closed his eyes, his face set in a deep scowl.

* * *

_Matthew's memory_

_Rosemary held me close as we got done watching the movie. Sorrow, grief and anger swirled around the room. Some of my sisters cried a little, unable to bear the dark knowledge daddy just showed us._

_Even I cried a little. The images from the video were too overwhelming._

_Father turned the lights back on and spoke. "Now what did we learn?" he asked._

" _That humans are horrible," Hypnia said drying her face._

" _True, what else?" daddy asked._

" _They are stupid. They kill one another for the most idiotic reasons," Serephina said._

" _True. What else?"_

_No one said anything._

" _Well I am sure you are wondering why I showed you all this video. I know I have told you of how flowed humans are, how primitive and backwards. But I needed to show you. As much as it pains me to to it I had to show you haw dangerous the world is. You think it was bad on film? Try being there yourselves. Humans are to afraid. Afraid of life and death, of change and history, of each other and themselves. This even happened less then a century ago yet humans have already begun to forget about it. Some even dare say it is a hoax."_

" _But how can they say it was a hoax? All the videos and the survivors testimony," Thessaly said._

" _They are ignorant, they are stupid, ignorant, or some odd combination of that. They have such short lifespans, they cannot believe anything unless they see it and touch it themselves. Then they write it down or record it and pass it on to their offspring, but they chose what to believe or not to believe."_

_He walked in front of us, his hands clasped behind his back. "I also showed you this to show you the reason why we hide from humans. If they are good at one thing, it is finding ways to kill. It started with their teeth, when they would bite and claw one another when they were still apes. They they moved on to clubs and rocks, then spears and swords, than crossbows and catapults, then canons and bombs and guns. But the greatest weapon was the A-bomb. The ultimate realization of the human desire for death and destruction."_

_We all shuddered at the memory of the video he showed us._

" _One thing the Volturi got right is keeping us a secret. Humans crave death my children. They will use every excuse to do it, over politics, religion, or some self-righteous desire to prove they are superior. Then when they have won the war and the land is destroyed and bathed in blood they become wide eyed and moan in despair. Then they say how wrong it was and try and make little token gestures and say they have learned from their mistakes only to repeat them years later."_

_He stood in front of us, his hands behind his back._

" _Vampires are more evolved, but even we have our weaknesses. Like humans we fight over territory, which is pointless seeing how there are over five billion humans in the world. See everything human is intensified, the good and the bad. We are immortal so we lack the humans ability to adapt and evolve. We depend on them to procreate new vampires and in some cases hybrids like you. One of the main problems humans have is they are too close minded; they exist in hundreds of different tribes and forms of government. Their own passion which makes them so great also cripples them as they are unable to cope with each others beliefs and costumes. The Nazi's were the result of ignorance and fear and the human desire to kill, a very deadly combination as the Jew's discovered. Germany was going through a rough patch and they had no one to blame, then along comes one man and he gives them a way to release themselves of their anger and frustration."_

" _So if humans and vampires are no better then what makes us so special?" I asked._

" _Because, you will have all our strengths and none of our weaknesses. Over time you will slowly infiltrate their governments and seats of power. What I teach you will help you for that day. See humans are so weak because they depend on to many things to live, they are driven by fear of death. They are ignorant and stupid. Vampires are too aggressive and territorial and unchanging. But by mixing the two species, hybrids will be more fit to take over the world. No more wars, no more damage to the world, no more blood bath's over territories that we need not fight over. In making hybrids we make a species more fit to rule the world than human or vampire. This will result in the eventual extinction of vampires and humans but sacrifices must be made for the common good. Some might call me mad or power hungry, but I know I am flowed. After all I am a vampire. But vampires like humans can have a special few who have the power to change the course of history. I am one of them. Unlike the others I am willing to make the sacrifices we need to make to stop the fighting and the wars. I see the patterns my children, if the humans are allowed to continue then the day will come where they will learn of us vampires and they will not tolerate us."_

" _Could the humans really make weapons to kill us?" I asked._

_I had seen father fight before, it was hard to believe he was in danger of humans._

" _Of course, like I said if anyone can find a way to kill something the humans can and will. They will scorch the earth to eradicate us. Think of it. All these human governments and these human religions wage war on one another. For what? Human families can not even accept one another in their own homes. If they can not accept themselves or each other in their own homes why should they accept us? And once they have eradicated us they will return to one another and in the end destroy themselves."_

" _What will we do father? Tell us," Alley asked._

" _We wait. We have time; we have patience, which is something the humans barely have. Given enough time and strategy, when our numbers are greater and the blood is perfectly mixed we will bring a new order."_

" _But father, surely you could not father a whole species, not by yourself?" Rosemary asked._

_Dozens of voices agreed._

" _True. If I am to speed things up I will need assistance. But fear not, I have reached out to some individuals who I think will enjoy helping us. Their reasons different then ours but none the less useful for our own goals."_

_He clapped his hands together. "Now, let's hunt, I don't know about all of you but I am quit thirsty."_

_We all began to leave the room. I saw Serephina move to father and was talking to him to quietly for me to hear over the voices of my sisters. Rosemary held me in her arms as we walked with the others. Preparing to find some unfortunate humans to feast on in the jungle._

" _Rosemary, do you know who daddy is going to have help us?" I asked._

" _I do," she said._

_I like Rosemary, she is one of my favorite sisters. She looks after me a lot._

" _Who are they? How will they help us?" I asked._

" _If father wished you to know he would have just told you and the others," she said._

" _You know what he plans, I know you do. Father trusts you to tell all his plans. Why won't he tell me his secrets, I am his son you know," I said feeling pouty._

" _Stop that now Matthew. You are still young and growing. When you reach maturity father will let you take a more active role. You are very important to his plans you know. He just wants you to enjoy what little child hood you will have before you take the responsibilities me and the others have," she said._

_I sensed she was being honest._

" _Okay, when I grow older...do you think I could use my power to fill the world with love? Maybe that's what daddy wants me to do, use my power to fill the world with love."_

_Rosemary sighed. "I am afraid not even your power can change the heart of the world little brother. Father's plans for you are more practical. You will find out soon enough."_

* * *

Matthew P.O.V

A few days later, Volturi attacked and I was never finding out what daddy's plan for me is being.

Daddy had so many plans, he thought he had all time in world, but he never got to see them throughs.

None of us did.

Is this why daddy wanted Rosemary to protect me? So when and if something happen to him I take overs? Was he wanting me to carry on his legacy?

Should I carry on legacy?

"Matthew? What is wrong?" Leah asked.

I look at Leah and Fred-Fred, they are being very worried now.

Daddy say vampires and humans are flowed. He is saying we hybrids take over. In old days me think he right. But now me think he may be little bit wrong.

If humans and vampires are being weak then why Leah love me when she has every reason to hate me? Why Fred live with us and drink animal blood when he have every reason to want to kill us so he have land to himself and continue drinking humans.

Yet here they are being with Matthew, loving me's and protecting me's from the world.

Maybe daddy spent too much time looking at bad side of world and not enough looking for good. Maybe to change world I need not do it like daddy, he say there be one person either human or vampire who change the world. Why can't me's be one hybrid?

What if here and now me make world a better place, by showing other wolfies and vampires that peace and cohabitation is possible. If we cohabit with one another then we can live with humans to.

Me smile at them and hand Fred-Fred DVD. "Nothing, Matthew just thinking too hard."

They looked at one another and me is knowing they not believe me's, but they not say anything.

We watch movie and me very cozy sitting between Leah and Fred-Fred.

Me know daddy wrong now. It true, humans, vampires, werewolves, none of them perfect. There are being many things wrong with people of all sorts, but although we may be having different idea's and customs in the end it not matter. We still people, we still love and hate and live and die and think and feel.

I have seen the strings of the world; I have seen the delicate colors of every emotion man or beast can feel. Maybe daddy right, maybe man kills self in end, maybe man learn better and make friends. Maybe in order to understand peace we must understand one another, see things from others point of view. Leah supposed to hunt vampires, Fred-Fred supposed to eat humans. But they chose different, they understand like I do that the world is a point of view, they understand good and evil not as easily seen.

I have seen good and evil in many forms, I know this, what we do is a very good thing. It fill me with hope (which is a golden yellow) that one day all people live, love and laugh with one another.

Maybe in order for us all to make world better place we be learning to love each other, no matter how different we being.

 

**Fusedtwilight: Everything is going so good, what could happen to ruin it. Stay tuned to find out and please review.**


	17. Chapter 17

Focused Madness

Chapter 17

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing.**

**We now skip two years later in the story to see how our fav three characters in the story are doing for themselves.**

 

 

Two years later

Leah P.O.V

"Fred, Matthew! Time to eat!" I called.

I closed the back door and put dinner on the table. Only I and Matthew would be eating, but Fred liked to join us and talk.

They were out right now, hunting before dinner. It was easier for Matthew to have human food after he drank blood first. He still preferred human blood.

Fred had been clean for two years now as well. He still avoided humans; he was having trouble still adjusting to his new diet. Years of drinking human blood was going to make it difficult for him.

The door opened when I finished getting the table ready. Fred and Matthew came walking in, laughing about something.

"Leah, Fred and me found a bear!" Matthew said.

He wore a pair of shorts and nothing else. He had grown up so much these last two years. He now looked like he was ten or eleven where once he looked six or seven. Three more years and he will be fully mature.

He had sprouted up since we first got here. He now stood at five foot three; he was more gangly and lanky now that he was starting to grow into his body. I would like to keep his hair cut short but he liked having long hair, it went past his shoulders like black silk. A year from now, maybe less he would begin to fill out and start growing muscles to fill in that skinniness.

He was still beautiful to look at though, he still had that child like angelic beauty Nessie had. It was kind of odd though, he looked like a mini-Nahuel. I wonder how much more like his brother he will look like when he finally grows up?

I am sure of one thing; he will be a knock out with the ladies when he does. Not liking the idea of that at all.

"I hope you didn't spoil your apatite," I said.

He shook his head and sat at the table. I was reminded of Seth during his early days as a wolf. He was so young and eager to prove himself to the others. With his tan skin, black hair, wearing nothing but shorts he looked like he could be a Quileute.

"Matthew, I know you are not sitting at the table before you wash your hands," I said.

"Sorry Leah," he said looking sheepish. He got up and ran to the sink and washed his hands real quick.

Fred sat down at the table, his space was empty.

Matthew went to grab some food but I gently slapped his hand. "What do we do before we eat?" I asked.

He looked at me sheepishly and pulled his hand back. "We pray."

"That's right."

I sat down and we all put our hands together to pray. "Matthew, you do the honors," I said.

"Okay Leah. Hi God it's Matthew again. Leah made stuff to eat for us again, I don't like it, I like blood more still but I still like chocolate. Fred is with us but he won't be eating because vampires don't eat as you are knowing. I just want to say thanks for giving us lots of yucky human food to eat today oh and thanks for making lots and lots of tasty animals to eat, they not as good as humans but they can be more fun to kill. Thanks for giving me Leah to look after me and thanks for giving us Fred-Fred to look after us. Fred-Fred is really smart and cool and he shows me all kinds of card tricks. I have been really happy these two years, Leah and Fred-Fred teach me how to count and read and write. I miss the Cullen's and big brother Nahuel and I hope I can see them again soon. But anyway thanks for everything and I hope we can be happy longer time so thanks again and tell mommy I love her and I am being a good boy and I hope she is doing okay and I miss her and I can't wait to see her again one day and if you see daddy tell him I love him too and my sisters too. Okay, you can go now, bye."

It was the strangest grace I have ever heard, but damn if it didn't make me feel good. Matthew's grammar has gotten better these last few years, still room for improvement but at least he is saying 'I' instead of me.

Hearing his speech made me smile though. The last two years had been the most peaceful I have ever had since I became a wolf. No vampires (not counting present company) no murderous covens, no drama, no imprinting. I still missed home. I still called there every so often to talk to mom or Seth.

I called the Cullen's too so they could talk to Matthew. They were happy to hear he was happy and doing well.

There had been no more incidents with Matthew in two years either. He had not gained any new memories which I had to be thankful for.

Fred was still living with us. We had a weird domestic arrangement me and Fred. I would go to work and he would stay behind looking after Matthew, taking care of the house. I would come home and he would have dinner ready.

I admit I didn't think things would work out in the beginning. But things were going great for all of us. I enjoyed having him around. He wasn't nosy, bossy, arrogant, or asked too many questions. I had to love that about him.

He knew all about me though, the last two years I learned to trust him enough to tell him all about me. Even about the whole Sam and Emily situation. He was a real good listener. The way he sat there and took everything in, never interrupting or asking questions.

He already knew about Sam and Emily because of Seth and his big fat mouth but he still listened to me as I vented about them.

It felt good to talk to someone about my problems and not hear them say it was meant to be or I would get over it or one day I would look back on it all and laugh. Because it has been little over three years since it happened and I am not laughing at all.

Fred wouldn't lie to me, he knew some pain you just don't get over. But you keep moving forward because what else can you do? You take what you got and be thankful you are still alive and aren't dead or worse.

I listened to him talk about his life as a newborn. About Bree. His human life. What it had been like when he was all alone after he got smart and left the other newborns.

We were both patient and doctor to one another.

He was still handsome as hell. I never admitted it to anyone but I do think he is the most handsome vampire I have even seen. There were times I would watch him from the corner of my eye. I could not help it, he was the good looking. I even was so used to his smell now I could easily ignore the burning it caused me. I could smell his scent underneath that sickly sweet smell.

It was like fresh book pages, calm, soothing, relaxing to smell.

We became good friends me and Fred. I trust him to protect Matthew and me with his life and I admit, I would do the same for him. He has done so much for us these last two years; I wouldn't have gotten this far without his help.

Thanks to him I can go to work knowing Matthew won't wonder off and get in all sorts of trouble. Thanks to him Matthew has someone like himself he can relate too and learn from.

While I was at work Fred took it upon himself to teach Matthew. He had been a college student before he was turned into a vampire. He taught him everything he knew. He was really good at math. Matthew however like all kids seemed to have a powerful aversion to it.

Fred had taken on the role of mentor and protector too Matthew. He was like a father figure for him. I could see it in his eyes when he looked at Fred. Like how Seth looked at Jake when he was younger.

I got a job at a grocery store up in the city. I didn't want to get something bigger then that because I was considering moving.

I had been able to explain to the others that Matthew had a rare hormone disorder that made him grow faster then he should, but there was only so long I could use that excuse before it would be to ridiculous for everyone to believe.

"So you think we should leave?" Fred asked.

"Yeah, I can't keep using the hormone disorder excuse for Matthew. Their buying it for now but it will only be a matter of time before they stop believing it."

"Any idea's?" he asked.

"I was going to call the Cullens and ask them. I figure they must know some places for us all to hide. I figure some place like Forks that's cloudy and barely has any sunshine so you can go out and about."

"How about jolly old England?" Fred said doing a mock imitation of an English accent.

"How about no," I said.

"Yeah, let's go to England!" Matthew said excitedly.

"You just want to go there so you can find Hogwarts," I said.

"I don't care what anyone says, I believe Hogwarts exists and I will find it," he said his face set in a stubborn line.

I sighed. "I told you we shouldn't have read him Harry Potter."

* * *

Fred P.O.V

We waved goodbye to Leah as she drove off to go to work.

We went back inside and I got the books I bought from the Barnes and noble in the city for Matthew's lesson's.

"Now Matthew, what is the difference between prophase and metaphase?" I asked him.

He raised his hand. "Matthew, I asked a question directed at you, you don't have to raise your hand."

"Fred-Fred, I have a question."

"Does it relate to the lesson?"

He shook his head. "No, but it about Leah."

"Okay. What is it?" I asked.

"Do you like Leah?" he asked.

"Of course I do. We are really good friends," I said.

"I am meaning do you like her like you want to get your freak on with her?"

"Matthew!" I said shocked he just said that.

"Me know you like her more than you show Fred-Fred."

"Matthew, I think this is a little inappropriate," I said feeling uncomfortable with where this was going.

I knew he would see what I was feeling. It was true. I was attracted to Leah Clearwater.

How could I not be, she was a very beautiful girl. From her eyes, to her lips, to her legs. Yes I admit it I have watched her when she runs around in her short cut jean pants. I may be dead but I am a male. I thank that I have no blood though, otherwise Leah would tell how much her body affected me.

It wasn't just her body that drew me to her. It was her personality. Sure she could be stubborn and had a bit of a temper. But she was brave, loving, honest, fair, she spoke her mind, was independent.

I admired her for what she did. For me it was easy to leave the newborns. With the exception of Bree I had no connections to any of the others. But for her she had a whole family she had to leave behind. I can not imagine what it must have been like for her to leave La Push.

She told me all about her mom and brother. I knew all about Sam and Emily and imprinting. Matthew told me what it looked like to him and I was amazed at how powerful a bond a single glance in the eyes of another imprinting can make.

I knew she still harbored feelings for Sam. You do not feel that much anger for someone unless you still harbor some feelings foe them.

Her scent didn't bother me anymore, I was sued to it now. Underneath the wet dog smell I could smell her scent. She was spicy and musky. Like the forest on a hot dry day. When your nose burns with the smell of the woods on a hot summer day, when you can smell the bark and the earth so clearly. I had to wonder if the woodsy smell was because she was a werewolf.

None of the other wolves smelled like this, but I didn't spend so much time around them like I do with Leah.

"But Leah like you more than she show," Matthew said.

"What?" I asked surprised.

"She think you are really handsome, and she has tinge of soft pink like you do, soft pink means-"

"Love," I finished.

"I think you and her have very early stages of love. You trust one another, you like one another, you enjoy each others company. So why not become mates?"

"It would be awkward Matthew," I said.

"How? You already act like a mated pair."

I froze. "What?"

"You take care of the house, you cook food for her and me, you keep us safe. Leah provides for you, she likes you, she talks to you, she protects you to. You both are already acting like a mated couple. Why not make it official?"

"Because we come from two very different worlds Matthew, she is a werewolf and I am a vampire."

"But Jake and Nessie are different."

"Jake and Nessie are imprinted to one another. Me and Leah are just really good friends, that's all."

"But you and her and me could be a family forever. I am not going to age forever, you don't age, Leah does not have to age."

"Matthew this is not important to our lesson, I do not want to hear another word about it," I said. "Now let's continue."

"Okay Fred-Fred," he said.

We continued with the lesson but my mind was no longer in it. I was to busy thinking of his words. It was like he burned his thoughts in my mind and no matter how much I tried I could not forget what he said.

" _You already act like a mated pair."_

He was right; we were like a couple in a way. Except we lived in separate rooms and were not together as a couple, but I am now living the life of a domestic vampire. I have been for the past two years.

As Matthew had his head buried in his book...I was struck by de ja vu. A blurry human memory from my past floated into my head.

I had this image of a younger me, sitting at the kitchen table with a book and paper. My father was sitting across from me, helping me study.

I stared at Matthew, painfully aware now that the roles were now reversed. I was the father, teaching his son, and he was the child, learning from his father.

Matthew must have sensed what I was feeling because he looked up at me. "Fred-Fred, is everything okay?" he asked.

"Yes. It's fine."

* * *

Leah P.O.V

I got back home after my shit at the store.

I walked up to the door and like usual it opened before I could open it and Matthew was there to greet me.

"Leah!" he hugged me tight, "I missed you Leah."

I hugged him back. "I missed you too," I said.

I walked inside and could smell dinner cooking filled the air. Matthew held my hand as we walked into the kitchen. Fred was over the stove. "Hey Fred, what's cooking?" I asked.

I could have sworn I saw him tense a little. But it could have been my imagination.

"Steak, mashed potatoes and carrots," he said.

"Alright, I am going to get cleaned up first."

"Okay."

I looked at him for a second; I thought I detected something in his voice. Like when someone is mad at you but they don't want to show it so they agree with everything you say so you don't notice, but you notice anyway.

I went upstairs and caught a quick shower. I did my usual job at the store, I stocked shelves, I worked at the register. Not as fun as hunting vampires but it doesn't have the health risks.

I dressed and went downstairs and found dinner ready.

Matthew was sitting at the table and looked a little nervous. Fred was cleaning his hands and did not look like he was going to join us. "I am going out for a bit," he said.

"Everything okay?" I asked.

"Yes, just need some fresh air. I will be back soon."

He walked out of the kitchen, I heard the front door open and close softly. Matthew looked miserable. I sat down at the table and looked at Matthew.

"Something I should know Matthew?" I asked him gently.

He flinched like I had struck him. "Me make mistake Leah."

Uh oh, he said me. Matthew would revert to his old speech when he was angry or upset.

"What mistake?" I asked.

"Matthew asked Fred-Fred if he likes you. Like soft pink like."

That surprised me. "What? Matthew, what would make you think that? We're just friends."

"But you are both attracted to one another Leah. Me see it. The pink was dark at first, dark pink means lust, but it has slowly begun to turn soft. Soft pink means love. Matthew knows you look at him sometimes Leah, me know you are starting to feel things for one another."

"And you told this to Fred?" I asked trying not to be mortified.

Fred was a good guy, but he was really shy and closed up. I can only imagine what Matthew's words would have done to him.

This was one of those awkward 'Oh shit' moments when a kid says something and it makes things...well...awkward.

"Me sorry Leah, me see how lonely you get sometimes, me see how you want companionship. Me see you and Fred-Fred are attracted to one another so me ask Fred-Fred why he and you not be together. He say you from two different worlds and it not work but me say it could because Jake-Jake and Ness-Ness are together and he say it is because of imprinting and I think it is stupid because you both like one another and are real good friends already so why not?"

"Matthew, you can't just go and tell people how they feel for other people, especially about such personal feelings, we have talked about this."

"Me know, but me just want you and him to be happy Leah. Fred-Fred is not like you, he can't decide to not be immortal. He like that for all time, like Matthew will be when he grows up. Matthew wants to be with Fred-Fred and Leah forever."

"Matthew...do you think if me and Fred get together that I will stay immortal?"

He played with his food. "Yes. Me think of what it will be like when you get old and die and me not like it Leah. Me saw what you and Fred-Fred feel for one another and me hoped you could be together and be happy and we be happy forever, then we go back to Forks and we can live there because Fred-Fred can keep mean wolves away from us and you can visit your mommy and Seth-Seth and not miss home so much."

"Oh Matthew," I sighed.

"Sorry for being bad Leah. Matthew just wants to be with you and Fred-Fred forever, Matthew doesn't want to be alone ever again like he was when he first woke up." he shuddered and it was not a good shudder. "Me was so scared and alone. Vampires pick on Matthew, Matthew make them go away. Me do nothing but hide, sleep, eat and look for daddy. Me so alone, me so scared."

I reached across the table and touched his hand with mine. "You won't be alone Matthew, you have me and Fred."

"I have you for now Leah, but how long before you and Fred-Fred leave me like mommy, like daddy, like all the others?"

Unshed tears shined in his eyes and I ran my thumb over his knuckles. I got up and walked over so I could hug him. "I won't leave you Matthew, I will always find you, no matter what. I promise," I said.

Matthew said nothing. He leaned into me, hugging me tight.

I still saw him as that little boy who first latched onto me two years ago, but now he was a smarter little boy. I suddenly found myself facing a problem many mothers faced when their kids grow up.

They get smarter; they begin to lose that child innocence that made them ignorant to the truth. Hybrids are smarter than humans, even in the womb. I had to wonder how long ago Matthew worked all this out in his head?

I never had any intention of living forever. In the stories immortality is very hard to obtain or comes at great personal cost. But for my kind it is an option, want to live a few centuries? Just keep phasing, want to age? Just stop and let time do her magic.

But I never wanted to live longer. My life had been so full of pain the idea of living longer seemed like a nightmare. But seeing the pain the idea of me dying of old age made me rethink that idea.

I was happy now. I loved Matthew like a son. He filled the void I knew that could never be filled. Fred may be a vampire but he has caused me no problems and I trust him. He is so patient with me, even when I am a bitch. He reminds me of Seth. Actually he has more patience then Seth. He has never yelled at me or even scowled at me. He just looks at me with calm, reasonable eyes.

I had come to think of him as a close friend, bordering on family now. Because we had a very domestic arrangement. Only I was the daddy and he was the mommy. And now that I thought about it, a few extra years of this life doesn't sound so bad. Once Matthew fully matures and we get him more stable the possibilities for our lives could very well be endless.

We finished dinner and I watched TV with Matthew for a few hours. Soon he fell asleep and I gently picked him up and tucked him in bed. I heard the door open and close downstairs and I knew I had to talk to Fred.

As I was leaving Matthew's room he began to murmur in his sleep.

"Morphia."

He rolled onto his tummy and started to snore. I wondered what a Morphia was but figured it was something he picked up from Fred. I closed the door and headed downstairs to talk with Fred.

* * *

_Matthew's dream_

_I dream I am in the woods with Leah and Fred-Fred._

_We played hide and seek. The sun was out and Fred-Fred sparkled. Then the Cullen's appear and I am happy to see them again. We call them on the phone sometimes but me not see them for long time. Then wolves show up and they are nice and Leah is happy to see Seth-Seth and her friends and we all play hide and seek._

_Then the sky goes black. Then one by one the darkness swallows thems all. One by one they all fall in darkness._

_Leah is last one to go, I beg her not to go. I even hold onto her as tight as I can but she fades from me._

_Matthew looks around, a horrible feeling of realization hits me. I am no longer in the forest of Priddis. I am now back in the jungle, I am back in cloths I wore night I woke up alone._

_My own body has returned to it's younger form when I was so small, so scared, so...alone._

" _Leah! Leah!" I called. There was no response. Just the dark and the sound of predators hidden in the night, watching me, waiting for me to feel safe and secure so they can attack me and hurt me._

" _Please, somebody, I don't want to be alone...not again," I whimpered sitting down, holding my knees to my chest._

_I heard a girly giggle then. "Leah?" I said looking up._

_The bushes in front of me rustled. I heard the giggle again. It couldn't be Leah, it was to...girly to be Leah and Leah did not giggle._

" _Who is there?" I said standing up. Me ready for a fight. Me going to tear things head off and drink it's blood!_

_From the bushes walked out a little girl. She is five years old. Her skin is tan like me, she have black eyes and black curly hair._

" _Hello, why so sad?" she asked._

" _Leah and everyone gone again, me not want to be alone, me scared to be all alone again," I said._

_She walked over and held out her hand. "It is okay, you have me now. My name is Morphia."_

_I shook her hand. "I am Matthew."_

_A look of extreme pleasure crossed her face. Me see happiness and delight and a feeling of victory in her aura._

" _Well Matthew I am here now, you won't be alone ever again. Come play with me, we will have so much fun."_

_She waved her arm and the jungle and the darkness vanish. Soon we are in a vast carnival and the sun was out and we were the only ones about. "Come, lets play." she held out her hand._

_I looked at her closely. There was something familiar about her. Everything about her was beautiful. Like none human beautiful. And there was something familiar about her._

" _Have we met before?" I asked. "You look familiar."_

" _No we have never met before." truth speckled her aura._

_I took her hand and she smiled. We walked down in the caravel. I could feel the sun on my skin, I could smell the smell of candy in the air. Me know it is a dream, but it most real dream me ever have._

* * *

Fred P.O.V

I came back home and I knew Matthew was in bed. It was to quiet in the house. Matthew like all kids was rather noisy.

I walked inside and decided to do the dishes. I heard movement form upstairs and I figured Leah heard me come back. I had been doing a lot of thinking since I had been gone. Matthew's words followed me no matter how hard I tried to focus on something else.

I was not used to thinking about such private and personal things. It made me uncomfortable. I was similar to Bella in that respect. I was very private.

I saw the dishes in the sink and went to wash them. I heard Leah walk up behind me. "Hey," she said.

"Hey," I said.

"Fred, Matthew told me about the talk he had with you."

I wanted so bad to throw my power up and hide from her.

"Fred, we need to talk."

"What about?" I asked trying to be coy.

"About what Matthew said."

"What about it?"

"Cut the bullshit Fred, I know what he said freaked you out. You wouldn't be acting like this if it didn't."

I sighed and turned to face her. "He said things Leah. Things that have got me thinking."

"You too huh?"

"He said our feelings have started to turn soft pink."

"I always hated that fucking color," she said.

I smiled. "So, um...yeah...I uh..." I was at a loss for words.

"I think you are very good looking Fred," she said, seeing that I was not able to properly talk at the moment. "I mean seriously, if I was a normal girl and I saw you walking down a street I would love to just look at you. I mean if you are like this as a vampire I can't imagine what you must have been like as a vampire."

I felt like I should be blushing, if I still had blood that is. "Thanks Leah."

"I like you because you are so damn patient with me, even when I deserve to be yelled at and I am being cranky as hell. You look after Matthew and teach him stuff a kid should be learning from another guy, you fix the house and do what ever I ask you. You are calm and level headed and you protect us from harm. I never really show how glad I am you are around. I love Matthew but I enjoy having you around, it's nice having a grown up around the house."

"Wow, I never knew you felt that way."

"Well one thing we have in common is we both are private about our feelings," she said.

"I like you to Leah. You are strong, resourceful, but even though you can be cranky as hell you work hard and you do your best to make other people happy."

A heat began to grow between us. It was like talking about our feelings had begun to let all that soft pink flow. I like soft pink, real nice.

"Matthew told me he was hoping he could get us together so we could be together forever," she said.

"What?" I asked.

"He finally figured out he will be immortal and you are immortal and well, I am immortal as long as I phase."

"I thought he didn't like the idea of guys liking you?"

"I guess you are the exception, well you and..."

"And who?" I asked. Matthew had no liking for any of the local men.

She blushed a little in the face. "Me and Nahuel."

"His brother?"

"Yeah."

My heart dropped when I heard her heart flutter. "Were you and him together?"

"Not as a couple, but we did have sex." she truly blushed now.

"Oh, um...awkward," I said rubbing the back of my head.

"Yeah. He is a good guy, but I wasn't looking for romance. Matthew likes the idea of me and him hooking up. But I guess he wants his mommy and his daddy to be together."

"You see the pattern too, huh?" I asked.

"Yeah. We have become parents. A vampire and a she-wolf have become parents to a hybrid."

"Sounds like they summary of a show."

"Sounds like a fan fic with poor grammar."

We both laughed.

"So what are we going to do?" I asked.

"I don't know. I figured, I raise him until he is old enough and has some sanity back enough. We go back and he can live with the Cullen's or the Denali coven or Nahuel. But now? I don't think I can let him go Fred. The idea of letting him go." she shook her head.

"What about us Leah?" I asked softly.

She rubbed her shoulders. "Well, I have no answer for that. I want you to stay Fred. Not because you are useful, or your talent. But because you are my friend and I know I can trust you. And because a part of me would be really sad to see you go."

I didn't know what to say to that.

I was a little startled when she laughed. "figures, I finally find a guy I am interested in and he is a vampire, my sworn enemy."

"I have never had a girlfriend."

Her eyes got big and round. "Really?"

"Yes. I mean there were plenty who liked me for my looks, but I always found them to shallow for my tastes and I was more interested in studying. I figured, job, house, financial stability then girlfriend. But life had other idea's for me."

"I had my life planned out, then this shit happened," she said.

"You think about what it would be like if we were normal? If there was nothing supernatural in the world?"

"Oh hell yeah, I would be married to Sam and we would have our own place and might even have a kid. But you know where that went."

"I would still be in college earning my masters. Still boring and dull, but at least I am human, at least I can see my parents."

"We both got screwed over bad; we both got burned by life."

"Yes. But now, we have a chance to make things right. You are out of La Push like you wanted, you have a job, you have your own house. I don't have to drink human blood, I am no longer alone."

"Matthew is afraid to be alone you know. He is afraid you and me will disappear and he will be all alone again."

"I won't allow that to happen," I said firmly. "I know what it is like. I will not allow Matthew to go through that again Leah. He deserves more than that. If anyone tries to hurt us I will kill them!"

"Wow, that's the first time I have ever seen you get all worked up since we first met."

"I am serious Leah, you and Matthew are my family, I won't lose another one."

She smiled, for some reason it made her seem more beautiful. "Fred, I have been thinking. Maybe now is a good time to go back to Forks."

I blinked. "Uh, did you not just here me say I will kill anyone who tries to tear us apart? Last I checked that includes some of your friends. I would hate to have that as a kink in our...relationship," I said.

She rolled her eyes. "If they come anywhere near us I would kill them. But with your power plus Matthew's power it would be impossible for the wolves to come near us."

"Where would we live?"

"Well I figure once the Cullen's move out they would let us use their place. I mean they won't be able to stay there much longer right?"

I nodded.

"And once they are gone we can move in because I won't have to worry about Jake and Nessie being separated because of my and Matthew's association with the Cullen's. I can visit mom and Seth and you can help protect Matthew while I am gone, just like now."

"I don't know Leah," I said.

"I will tell them this is their last chance, either they accept Matthew as a part of my life or I leave for good. I have gone two years away from La Push. If need be I will never go back, and I will tell them this in wolf form so they know I am serious."

"Are you sure, we have a good thing here."

"I can only blame Matthew's growing up on a hormone disorder for so long Fred. And we are not getting older ourselves."

"You have a point."

She walked closer to me. "I am tired of running Fred, the time has come to make a stand. Matthew isn't dangerous. When was the last time he had an episode or attacked someone...not counting the neighbors dog."

"You said it yourself, he attacked a wolf's imprint. Sam-"

"Fuck Sam!" she said throwing up her arms. "Sam won't be able to come near Matthew, I mean can you imagine what would happen if he used his power to increase your power? Can you imagine what you're gift would be like times twelve? Hell you could probably hide a whole town then."

"But what if they tell you to leave?"

She laughed. "They are still begging me to come back. And I will. But if they want me to come back, they will have to except Matthew with me. They either take all of us, or none of us. Simple as that."

"You make it sound so easy."

"You make it seem so hard. We have to leave Priddis sooner or later Fred. Two years we have lived here, two years for things to simmer down and I will make things very clear to them."

I thought of the pro's and the con's of the decision. She was right, with my gift the wolves could never come anywhere near me or Matthew, especially if Matthew made my gift stronger. The Cullen's would be leaving soon, Leah never told them where we were because she didn't want to involve them.

"I think we should call Jake and Carlisle before we go back."

She grinned. "Thanks Fred."

"No problem. Your right, the time is come for us to move. Matthew is more stable than before, we'll be fine."

We were so close to one another now, I could feel her body heat like a roaring fire.

"So, um. What about us?" I asked.

"Is there an "us"?" she asked.

That was a good question. Was what we feeling strong lust mixed with affection? Or was it the beginnings of something more? Was if possible for a vampire and a werewolf to be together? Or was it just wishful thinking.

"There is something, but I don't know what it is. I am not used tot his kind of thing Leah. I have never been in a romantic relationship, I don't know what I am doing or even this is something more than a good friendship."

"I know how you feel. I haven't been in love since Sam. Nahuel was just lust. But love? Sometimes I crave it but I just can't imagine anyone else you know?"

I nodded. "Maybe we should just wait then? Wait and see what happens, I mean it's not like we are in a rush."

"Most guys are pushy when it comes to stuff like this," she said.

"I am not most guys," I said.

"Thank god. If you were anything like Emmett I would have killed you years ago."

"Hey, why you dissing the Em?" I said doing a mock imitation of Emmett.

She laughed.

"Well I am going to give Carlisle a call, see what he thinks then I will call Jake," she said.

"Okay, I will get started on the dishes," I said.

Leah left to go call Carlisle; I continued to wash the dishes. I tried to think it was all business as usual, but after our little talk I know things will never be the same between me and Leah.

* * *

_Matthew's dream_

_Morphia and I had a lot of fun. We rode lots of rides and played lots of fun games._

_The dream was so real, the cotton candy even tasted real and I have never had it before!_

" _So Matthew, tell me, where are you from" Morphia asked._

" _Me not sure where me come from, people tell me I am from a place called South America. I am in North America now, I haven't been to East America or West America yet but I hope to one day."_

" _You say people? Who are these people?" she asked._

" _The Cullen's of course. They find Matthew when he is alone and they teach him to be a better boy. I met Leah when I lived with them. I love Leah. I wish she was here now. I miss her."_

" _Do you still live with these Cullen's?" Morphia asked._

_A thread of excitement and impatience mingled in her aura now. It was the kind of combination you get when you know you are about to get something you want and can't wait to have it._

" _No, I live with Leah and Fred-Fred now. They take care of Matthew and teach him and hunt with him."_

" _Where exactly do you live now?" she asked._

" _In a Canada, a plca called Priddis, Leah says it is a hamlet which means it is at the bottom of the hick chain. I don't know what a hick is but Leah thinks it's really boring. I like it though, there's lots of animals for us to eat."_

" _Animals? You eat animals?" she asked disgusted._

" _Of course, we can't eat humans, that's bad."_

" _But there our natural source of food."_

" _Our?" I asked confused._

_The dream began to dull and loose focus, and with it Morphia._

" _Wait, Morphia where are you going?" I asked._

" _You are waking up Matthew, but don't worry, you will be seeing me again really soon," she said with a smile._

" _What do you mean? I can't see you, this is a dream."_

" _Is it?" she asked._

_Then I woke up._

* * *

Matthew P.O.V

"Matthew wake up," Leah said.

I moaned and cracked my eyes open. "Morning sleepy head," Leah said smiling at me.

I got up and looked at her. Her aura was really bright and shiny today. What made her so happy.

"Why are you so happy today Leah?" I asked.

"I got good news. How would you like to go see the Cullen's?" she asked.

"Really? That would be great! But Leah what about the wolves?" I asked.

"What about them? With Fred we can keep them away. I am also going to tell them I won't stay if they don't accept you. They either let us all live in peace or they will never see me again."

"You would really do that for me?" I asked.

"Of course. I told you I wasn't going to leave you Matthew and I meant it."

"Oh Leah." I hugged her tight, I was so happy. I could not wait! We were going back to Forks and we could see all our friends again!

"Fred will come with us to right?" I asked.

"Of course. We can't leave Fred behind," she said.

"Is he mad at me?" I asked.

"You know he isn't Matthew. You got to remember some people aren't as comfortable with their feelings being talked about."

"Sorry Leah, I can't help it. I see emotions every day, it's the one part of my power I can't control."

"Well just say sorry to Fred when we go downstairs. He's making a big breakfast to celebrate our return to Forks."

"I can't wait!"

"Me nether, now go get a shower and get dressed."

"Okay Leah." I got up and grabbed some cloth's from my dresser and went to get a shower.

"Hey Matthew, who is Morphia? You were muttering in your sleep," Leah said.

"Just a girl I dreamed of. We were in this big carnival and rode rides and played games and talked."

"What did you talk about?"

I frowned, I couldn't really remember. "I don't know. But I remember she was really excited when I answered her questions."

"Huh. Okay, get dressed and I will meet you downstairs."

"Okay Leah."

* * *

Joham P.O.V

We stood over Morphia as she slept.

We have been doing this for month's now and I was beginning to lose hope. Matthew had been gone for three years now and was most likely dead.

Morphia woke up and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. "Well, did you find anything?" I asked.

I was already expecting a no. So many times I had hoped and so many times I had been disappointed. Morphia's ability to traverse the dreaming was useful and I had hoped she could find Matthew in his dreams. She had been trying for month's now. But she was never able to find him.

I expected her to frown, or look away. Instead she smiled. "I found him grandpa."

A rush of excitement filled the room. "Are you sure sweetie?" Hypnia asked her daughter.

"Yes ma ma, he is just like what Rosemary described, only he is older."

"Rosemary," I said.

She stepped forward and placed her hand on Morphia. Her face lit up with excitement and she looked at me. "It's him father!"

"Show me," I ordered eagerly.

She walked over and placed her hand on my head. I closed my eyes and saw the image of Matthew in the dream. MY son, he has grown up so much. He is starting to look more and more like me, he has grown so much.

Rosemary pulled her hand back and I smiled in triumph.

"He lives, my son lives!" I yelled in delight, throwing my hands up in the air. "Where is he?" I asked Morphia.

"He said Canada, a hamlet called Priddis."

"Excellent! I knew he would survive, my son is like me, nothing can stop him."

"But he is not alone."

"What?"

"He says he was found by a coven calling themselves the Cullens."

"The Cullens? The ones in Forks?"

"Yes, but he says he lives with someone called Leah and Fred now."

"The Cullens are that coven that survived the entire Volturi aren't they?" Hypnia asked.

"Yes, they are," I said.

"They must know what he is capable of. According to our contacts they feed only on animal blood," Seraphina said. "Maybe they are hoping to domesticate him. Use him to their advantage."

"But There are no members called Leah and Fred," I said. "Not counting that wolf who is connected to their hybrid there are nine members."

"Maybe they have added more."

"But why give new members Matthew to raise by themselves?" I asked.

"Perhaps they posses gifts that help them raise him?"

"It matters not. We know where he is now, and we will claim him. I do not want them filling his head with their nonsense. Seraphina, gather some of your sisters. I want you to bring him back to us and if anyone tries to stop you destroy them."

"Yes father, I will bring our brother back," Seraphina said.

"Father, let me go," Rosemary said, "I failed to protect him, I allowed him to slip away, please let me help return him. Let me cleanse myself of my dishonor."

"I have already forgiven you Rosemary," I said.

"But I have not forgiven myself. Plus he and I were close, it might be easier to get him to come with us if I was there."

"Good point. You may go, you too Hypnia."

"Can I go?" Morphia asked.

"No sweetie, you stay here where you are safe," Hypnia said.

"Take how ever many you want," I told Seraphina. "Bring Matthew back to us, without him our plane can not succed."

"Don't worry father, I will not fail you."

"I know you won't."

Seraphina went to go and gather the sisters she would take with her. I knew I could count on her to gather Matthew. Soon I will have my son back with me and then the Volturi will finally fall and from the ashes a new order will rise and take control.

 

**Fusedtwilight: Oh no, Joham is alive and now they are coming for Matthew! What will they do? What about the developing feelings between Fred and Leah? Will they be able to save Matthew from his father? And how does Joham know so much about the Cullen's? Please stay tuned and review.**


	18. Chapter 18

Focused Madness

Chapter18

 

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing.**

**Things get Reaaalllllly awkward between Fred and Leah.**

 

Leah P.O.V

"Are you sure you want to return Leah?" Jake asked.

"I am sure Jake. Time for me to come home."

"You know Sam will raise a fuss," he said.

"Sam can kiss my ass. If he tries to hurt Matthew I won't hesitate to stop him this time," I said.

Jake was silent on the phone. "You have changed Leah. I can hear the seriousness in your voice. Would you really fight Sam over Matthew after what happened last time?"

"Yes, I haven't come this far to lose Matthew to Sam's wrath Jake. Sam will either accept him or back the fuck off and you can tell everyone I said that."

"Wow, I thought mother hood was supposed to soften you."

"It can also harden you Jake. You can be all smiles and laughs outside but when someone threatens your kid the claws can come out."

He whistled. "Domestic life suits you Leah."

"Blow me."

He laughed. "Glad to see you haven't changed to much Leah. I will inform everyone of your return."

"I'm calling mom and Seth next."

"Okay, I will call Sam and tell him the news."

"I have already called Carlisle and told him. Once I settle things up here I will drive back down to Forks."

"You sure you want to leave?"

"I would like to stay longer but Matthew is still aging too quickly for me to use the whole hormonal imbalance excuse. Besides, I figure we can live in the Cullen's house when they leave."

Jake was silent on the phone for a moment. "Yeah, that will be soon."

"Sorry Jake, I know it will be tough on you."

"Yeah. I decided to stay when they leave."

"You have?" I asked surprised.

"She may be my imprint but they are her family. I can't just follow them around taking all her time from them. Besides I won't just drop the pack, not after all these years of building it back up."

"Will there still be a spot waiting for me when I come back?" I asked.

"Of course. I didn't think you missed being in a pack."

"Don't get me wrong, the privacy has been a blessing, but it is also kind of lonely. I miss running with other wolves and patrolling. I run with Fred and Matthew but it's not the same."

"So Fred will be living with you too?"

"Of course. He is a member of this family to you know. He has been a great help."

"I am glad. Nessie will be glad to see Matthew, wait until you see how much she has grown up," he said with pride.

"Does she know you won't be going with her when you leave?" I asked.

"No. I am waiting to tell her. I know she will be heartbroken, I will miss her, and I will visit her of course. But I have too many responsibilities here; I can't just drop them all."

"Glad to see one man can imprint and not just do a one eighty on everyone," I muttered.

He laughed. "Yeah. Well, I got to go, I will see you soon Leah."

"See you soon."

I hanged up and sighed. Time for the next call.

I had already called Carlisle and talked to him. He is happy to hear we will be returning. He already confirmed they can only stay one more year then they will be leaving. They just can't hide it anymore.

I dialed the house and hoped mom and Seth would be home. Four rings and someone picked up.

"Hello?"

"Mom?"

"Leah, sweetie how are you sweetie?" she asked.

I had stayed in touch with mom and Seth all these years. It was not easy, all the birthdays, and other holidays I missed. I sent them mail and cards but I still missed celebrating with them. The holidays got really emotional because mom tried so hard to convince me to come back.

"Good, hey is Seth there?"

"Yes."

"Get him would you."

"Sure. Seth!" she called.

I waited a moment and heard Seth move in the living room. "What is it?" he asked.

"It's Leah," mom said.

"Hey sis,"

"Hey. Listen, I got some good news." I took a deep breath. "I am coming back to La Push."

For a few seconds there was nothing. Then the phone erupted in cries of joy.

"Oh my god really?" mom asked and I could hear the tears running down her eyes. Seth I could hear jumping up and down in the back ground.

"Yes. We should be back sometime this month." I winced knowing she would notice the we part.

"We?"

"Yes. Me, Matthew, and Fred,"

There was silence.

"Leah you cannot bring that boy back here," mom said seriously.

"Yeah mom like I am actually going to bring Matthew to La Push," I said rolling my eyes.

"Leah Sam will try to kill him and you will leave again!"

"Sam isn't going to do a damn thing mom. I am moving back with Matthew and Fred and we are going to live together."

"What? Where are you going to live? Not La Push."

"No, as you know the Cullen's will be leaving soon. When they move we will move into their house."

"Leah."

"Look I am tired of running, I miss you, I miss Seth, I miss my friends I miss my home. What happened was unfortunate but who the fuck thought it was a good idea to bring humans to a game involving vampires? Not mine. Sam was as much fault as were we and I am not going to let Matthew suffer anymore because we fucked up and his daddy happens to be a psychopathic, raping piece of shit who thought he was some kind of god and filled his kids heads with a bunch of bullshit!"

I took a deep breath and composed myself.

"Matthew is older now; he has better control of his instincts. He is actually saying I instead of me now. This is how it is going to be mom."

"Then why don't you just give him to the Cullen's when they leave?"

"Because...I don't want to let him go mom."

"Leah?"

"I know this sounds crazy, but I love him. Not imprint love, thank god. But I have fed him, I cook him good, I hunt animals with him, I have helped him learn to read and write, every night we sit down and watch TV, I read him the same stories you and dad told me when I was a kid, I play with him, I protect him. I can't leave him. The idea hurts too much."

I wiped the lone tear from my eye.

"He is mine now mom, mine to love, mine to protect. Sam and the others will have to accept that. Jake does, he's all for me coming back."

"Leah what about your life? You can't raise a hybrid and have a normal life."

"I'm a werewolf mom, I can't ever be normal. And I am okay with that now, the life I have with Matthew and Fred is good, no great. I have a job now. I work five days a week at a little shop. Fred stays behind and watches him for me. He can protect him and us because of his gift."

"Leah...you haven't slept with him have you?" she asked a fearful note in her voice.

"For god's sake mom no!" I said blushing. Christ you sleep with one vampire then they think you sleep with them all!

"Well, after that Nahuel I was worrying you had a fetish or something."

"Please don't say fetish."

No one should ever hear their parent say fetish. The fact they know what it means opens a whole can of worms you do not even want to think about.

"Seth, your quiet, what do you think?" I asked.

"I just want you back Leah, if that means I have to accept Matthew and Fred I'm all for it, I met Fred, he's cool, and Matthew is awesome. As long as you are home I will be happy."

"Thanks bro. Mom?"

I heard her sigh. "Aw to hell with it, get your ass back here young lady and bring those cold one's with you. I don't care; I just want you back in my arms again."

"Thanks mom," I said.

"Don't thank me yet, when Sam finds out he is going to throw a fit."

"Well tough, he can't come near Matthew, not with Fred around. I wouldn't be surprised if Sam knows by now, Jake said he would be making some calls."

"Sweet lord when the elders find out. Don't worry baby, I will do what I can to smooth things over. I may not care much for them but if they make you happy then I will suck it up."

"Thanks mom."

We talked for a little while longer and then we hanged up. I put the phone down and sighed.

"So how did it go?" Fred asked.

I looked and saw he was leaning in the doorway. He wore a pair of tight fitting jeans and a white button up shirt that brought out the yellow in his hair and eyes. He had his arms crossed and I could not help but look at the muscles that tightened as he stood there.

I looked at him for a second, admiring the view. Ever since we got things out in the open between us something had changed between us. I was looking at him more, watching him, observing him. I caught him looking sometimes too.

It was like knowing he liked me too was waking things up in me. Primal things, needful things, womanly things. I did the best I could to control myself. God knows I do not want him to smell the lust coming from me like I was some bitch in heat.

I was also more worried about Matthew. Him and his damn soft pink. If he saw the feelings going on between me and Fred he might take them the wrong way.

"Good. Mom took some persuading but I convinced her in the end. I imagine Sam is having a major shit fit right now."

He walked over and gently picked up my feet and sat down, and then he placed my feet on his lap. I shivered because of how cold he was. Then to my utter amazement he began to give me a foot massage.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"Are you uncomfortable?" he asked.

"No, it feels great. But why are you rubbing my feet?" I narrowed my eyes at him. "You aren't one of those perverts who have a thing for feet are you?"

He laughed. "No, you just look real tired right now Leah. Carlisle taught me massage techniques for examining muscle tension and discomfort. I figured you could use a good foot rub. You work so hard and now you are stressing about the move."

"I am not stressing."

He gave me a look and a raised eyebrow.

"Alright maybe I am a little."

"Are you having doubts?"

"No, but this whole thing is stupid. It happened two years ago, what's the point of hunting Matthew now?"

I sighed in relief as his cold fingers worked their magic.

"Damn, if I knew you were this good I would have had you do it ages ago."

He chuckled.

I was really enjoying the massage. The feeling of his ice cold fingers smoothing out my muscles made these little shivers run down my legs. It was very intimate, but I was enjoying it.

"So when do you want to leave?" he asked.

"A few weeks, I have to let work know I am quitting and then we have to tell Lance we are moving," I said.

"It will be nice to go back to Forks," he said.

"You liked Forks?"

"Yeah. It was quiet."

"What about all the rain?"

"I like rain."

"You do?"

"Oh yeah. I like the way it sounds when it hits the earth, it's very soothing."

"Yeah, I know what you mean."

We sat there, in comfortable silence. Him rubbing my feet and me just laying there enjoying the feeling. I was glad we were going back, no more hiding, no more fear we would be discovered. The past two years had been good for me; it had taught me many things. I knew there was still a possibility it could all go south, but right now I don't care.

Matthew P.O.V

I sat on the stairs watching Leah and Fred.

I smiled seeing the soft pink colors of affection and comfort. Talking about their feelings seemed to cause a reaction that made the feelings enhanced. Like shining more sunlight on a flower to grow.

We were all happy. The house was bright with the colors of our happiness. We were like our own little sun. Soon we would go back to Forks and live there and Leah can visit her family and we will be safe from the wolves because with Fred and with my help they won't be able to come near us.

I have not done anything to make Leah and Fred love one another more. It has been tempting. But I will not manipulate them like that.

It will happen, I can see it. Then Leah will phase and live forever and we can all be together forever as a family.

And none of us will ever be alone ever again.

* * *

Alice P.O.V

Carlisle had already told us the great news. Leah and Matthew were coming back to Washington.

We were all happy to hear this, Leah kept in touch with us, but she never told us where she was hiding. I had a pretty good idea where they were. All I had to do was try and see areas that were blind spots in my vision.

Nessie was happy when we told her, she was two years and some months but she look like she was four or five now. "Matthew is coming, Matthew is coming!" she said dancing around.

Everyone was happy our friends were coming back. I wish I could say I was as happy. But there was a sense of unease in my heart. Like something or someone was whispering something urgent into my ear so low I could not hear them.

It got to the point where I went to my room to contemplate the reason for this feeling.

"Alice, what is wrong?" Jasper asked me.

I was pacing around the room and Jasper stood by watching me.

"I don't know. Ever since Carlisle told us that they were coming home I feel like...like something is going to happen, something I should know but I don't know what. It's driving me crazy!"

"Could it be your power trying to warn you of something?" he asked.

"It must be, but I don't know why I can't see anything. It can't be Leah or Matthew, I don't get nothing form them. So why am I feeling this way?"

A wave of peace and calm gently filled me. I stopped my pacing and stood there. Jasper walked up behind me and wrapped me in his arms. "Relax; maybe you are just worried about the wolves starting problems."

I sighed. "Maybe your right Jazz. But I feel like I gave forgotten something important. Something that has to do with Leah and Matthew. I just wish I knew what."

* * *

Fred P.O.V

"Well you ready to fold yet Fred-Fred?" Matthew asked with a smug smile.

"I am not ready to fold yet kid," I said.

"Boys," Leah said rolling her eyes.

We were all playing a game of cards. I had been really good at cards as a human; my father taught me everything I know. He was a professional player when he was younger. I had been teaching Matthew what I know, he learned quickly, and then again he learned everything quick. It was scary how quickly hybrids mentally matured. Matthew looked like he was ten but he was already reading college level books and knew how to do advanced geometry (Though he did not like it)

The problem when it came to playing cards with Matthew was he could read my aura and know if I was bluffing or not. I tried using my power to make it hard for him to read me but he still was a tough little bugger to beat.

We had been playing for over an hour now, Matthew won five games, I won two.

I raised my power a little and Leah and Matthew winced. I looked at my cards and saw I had three kings. I smiled and put them on the table.

Matthew smiled and showed his hand, all aces.

I groaned in defeat.

"You did good Fred-Fred, I almost couldn't see the sense of victory you had when you got your cards."

"What color is victory?" I asked.

"Vermillion," he said smugly.

"I never liked that color," I muttered.

"Yay! Matthew is card king!" Matthew said throwing his hands up in the air.

The sound of thunder could be heard; soon the sound of raid drops hitting the house could be heard. For a human it might not be heard, but for me it was like rocks hitting the house.

"Ohhh, it's raining, it's pouring, the old man is snoring," Matthew sang, "can we go play outside?"

"It's raining," Leah said.

"So, you and I run hot and Fred-Fred not bothered by cold, please Leah, let's go play in the rain?" he begged her.

"No," she said firmly, "we will get all muddy and wet."

"But that is the point, when was the last time you played in the rain Leah, please?" he begged.

He gave her those wide coffee brown eyes and I knew she would fold. She tried to look away but it was like he was a magnet, every time she looked I saw her resolve crumble.

"Fine, we will go out and play in the rain," she said.

Matthew threw his hands up in the air and made a "yippee." and went running upstairs to go get his rain cloth's on.

Leah sighed and looked at me and smiled. "Feel like getting wet?" she asked.

"Sure, I told you I like the rain. You ever try running as fast as you can when it rains?"

"No, are eyes can get hurt by the drops hitting our eyes if we run to fast," she said.

"Well it's amazing, when you run at full speed it's like the water drops float in the air," I said.

"Sounds neat."

"It is. Being a vampire can be real fun, now that I don't have to eat humans it is even more fun."

Matthew appeared wearing a pair of yellow rain boots, a yellow rain coat with the hood pulled up. "Come on Leah and Fred-Fred, let's go!"

"We're coming," I said getting up.

We locked up the house. Leah and I did not bother putting rain cloth's on. Before we left Leah put a pair of towels on the front porch for us so when we got back we wouldn't track water into the house.

We followed Matthew as he danced in the rain. We weren't worried about being seen, no one in their right mind would be caught in this rain. We walked into the woods, Matthew sang and danced and we followed him. Whenever he saw a puddle he would stomp on it sending water flying high into the air.

It was amazing to see him take such delight in such simple thing. I tried to remember if I was like that as a child, but those memories had already begun to fade by time and the burning fire of the venom made them seem like shadows in the mist. From what I could understand I was quieter and tamer than most kids, but I had my moments when I could entertain myself with the most mundane things.

"Let's play hide and seem in the rain!" Matthew said. "I will hide and you will both seek. Count to one hundred!"

Before we could say yes he ran off into the woods. We counted to one hundred and began to sniff him out; it wasn't easy because the rain was quickly washing away his scent.

All I needed was to find his heart beat. Thirty minutes later we heard the sound of his heart. We snuck around and saw his yellow coat. But something was off. The coat was too still, the heart beat was coming from close, real close.

I was about to tell Leah but before I could she sprang forward at the coat. "Got you," she said.

She grabbed the coat and found it was just a coat and a pair of boots propped up with sticks.

"Oh that sneaky little-"

Before she could finish a giant glob of mud came shooting from the trees and hit her in the back. Matthew came walking out of the woods, his hands covered in muck and he was completely drenched in water. A look of absolute mirth was on his face, his eyes twinkled with mischief.

"Surprise Leah," he said.

Leah turned around, her eyes narrowed on him. "You will pay for that."

She dropped the coat and reached down grabbing as much mud as she could and tossed it at Matthew. He dodged it and soon he and Leah were tossing mud balls at one another.

"Come on Fred-Fred, come play," Matthew said.

I shook my head. "I'll let you two goof off. Someone has to be mature here."

Leah and Matthew looked at one another with a raised eyebrow. Then they turned to me and pulled their arms back and soon my face was struck by two globs of mud.

I wiped the mud out of my face and sighed. "On the other hand."

I moved at full speed. I grabbed two hand fulls of mud and tossed them at Leah and Matthew. For over an hour we laughed and played, tossing mud and muck at one another and laughing like we were kids.

By the time we got home it was dark and we were all covered in wet earth. We washed ourselves off in the rain and grabbed the towels Leah had placed on the front porch for us. After we were all dry we walked into the house.

"That was fun!" Matthew said.

"It sure was, you little ninja you," Leah smiled at him.

"I fooled you both didn't I?"

"You sure did," Leah said, "let's go get you washed up."

She took him upstairs to get him washed. He may look ten but he still liked to have Leah help wash him from time to time. We have been trying to ween him of that. I had to wonder if Matthew would ever fully heal from his mental trauma, would he still be like a child even when he reached full maturity?

Jane's power was supposed to be like the fire we feel when we are being turned; I shudder at the thought of her power magnified. Just thinking about that monster makes a streak of anger run through me. I know what she did to Bree, how she tortured her with her power. Now without even meaning to, she hurts another I care for. Because of her Matthew may never have the mentality of an adult.

He was smart, but he still acted like a child. All because of Jane. I know one thing is for sure, if the Cullen's even fight the Volturi I will be more than happy to help them, and Jane will be my number one priority.

I locked the door and went upstairs to get a shower. I could hear Leah in the bathroom down the hall with Matthew. I went into my room real quick and grabbed a fresh pair of cloths and went into the unoccupied bathroom. I was just as dirty and I figured I would grab a quick shower while Leah was helping Matthew.

I wish I had enough sense to lock the door.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

"Are you sure?" I asked him.

"Yes Leah," Matthew said. "I am a big boy now, I don't need you to help me wash."

I sat his cloth's down on the counter. "Okay, I will leave you to it."

"You should go get a shower to Leah, you are dirty," he said.

It was true, I was covered in as much muck as he was. "I will, if you need any help call okay?"

"Okay."

I turned and walked out, closing the door as I left. I heard him turn the water on and heard him humming a song. Satisfied he was alright I walked into my room and grabbed some clean clothes and headed for the other bathroom at the end of the hall. I wish I had enough sense to knock first, because I hadn't considered the possibility someone was in it.

I mean I didn't hear anyone inside, I didn't see light shining through the cracks of the door. I smelled Fred's scent but I figured he was changing in his room, which was right next to the other bathroom.

I opened the door and saw Fred was in the bathroom. Had I been human I might now have seen as much as I did. But we wolves have a real good night vision which right now was a bit of a double edged sword.

Fred was in the bathroom, he had his shirt off and was pulling down his paints. With my enhanced vision I saw every little detail of freaky Fred. He was pale, which was expected for a vampire, he was well muscled all over. I had seen him without a shirt before and know he was well muscled. He told me he had worked out before he was turned to add some muscle to his frame.

But now that I was seeing the whole package I really saw how muscled he was. He had muscles everywhere. More than Edward and Jasper, but not as much as Emmett. He was well proportioned everywhere, and I do mean everywhere.

I should have closed the door or closed my eyes but it was like I was mesmerized. He was one of the most beautiful men I have ever met in my life, and that was when he was clothed, but without cloth's, when I could see the perfection he had enhanced by the venom he was truly beautiful.

He was one of those men you thought were tall but lanky until he lost the cloths and you saw how well muscled he was.

Little beads of water were running down his chest, stomach and certain other parts, a result from the wet cloths. He had laid a towel down on the floor to put the wet clothes on.

Just when I began to wonder why he hadn't noticed me his head snapped up, his eyes went wide and in less than a second he had a towel wrapped around his waist, depriving my eyes of the wonderful sight of his naked body.

"Leah!" he shouted.

I closed the door, the very vivid memory of his wonderful naked body was having very tingly affects on my body. Two years I have gone without sex and now here I am all horny again. I blame Nahuel, good sex has a bad affect on the libido.

"I am so sorry, I didn't think you were in there!"

"I thought you would be cleaning Matthew!" I heard him shout.

"He wanted to clean himself this time, he's going through the big boy phase."

"The what?"

"You know, the thing kids go through when they want to show how grown up they," I explained to the door.

He was quit for a while, I was about to leave when he said through the door.

"How much did you see?" he asked.

"...Everything," I whispered.

More quiet this time.

"By everything you mean?"

"You're freaky Fred? Yep."

I heard him choke on a laugh. "My freaky Fred?"

"Well you are well endowed."

There was another longer awkward silence. "I have never been seen naked by a girl before," he said.

"Was it good for you to?" I asked lightly trying to make fun of the situation.

He said nothing. I remembered who I was dealing with and realized I may have gone a tad too far in saying that.

"Leah I am done!" I heard Matthew say excitedly from the bathroom.

"Coming," I called.

"Well, um...sorry for rushing in," I said.

"Sorry for not locking the door," he said.

I walked back down the hall to Matthew's bathroom. I opened the door and found he had already put his clean clothes on.

"Leah I cleaned myself, I-" he stopped when he saw me. I cursed myself a fool. His fucking empath powers would tell him something was up.

"Leah? What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing. Go, I need a shower."

"What about the other one?"

"Fred is using it," I said.

I grabbed his shoulder gently and led him out of the bathroom. "Leah what is wrong? Why are you having swirl of dark and soft pink?"

"Matthew go!" I snapped.

He flinched and I felt bad for snapping at him. I sighed and pushed the shame away. I gave him a smile and calmly spoke.

"I am fine, now I really need to get a shower. And if you see Fred don't say anything to him about my colors or ask him about any colors you might see whirling around him okay?"

He leaned forward and whispered. "Did you and Fred-Fred have an embarrassing moment like people on TV?" he asked.

I decided to just say yes, no point in lying to him. "Yes, but that is all I will say, don't be asking anymore about it okay?"

"Okay Leah. I will go in my room and mind my own business."

"Thank you."

He pecked me on the cheek and left me to go into his room. I closed the door and sighed. I undressed and got in the shower. I turned the water on hot and began to wash the muck from my skin.

My thoughts turned to Fred, no matter how hard I tried the memory of him naked and so exposed was like fire. I could not help but remember.

God damn vampires! Why did they have to be so fucking good looking! I mean super-strength, super-speed, immortality, but no they also had to be so fucking beautiful.

I remembered how his chest was covered in mud and water, with his tall body and muscles he looked like a well groomed wild man.

A sigh escaped my body and I turned the water all the way to cold. But even that could not temper the fire that now raged inside me. I was a mother, a wolf, a worker at a grocery store, a native girl in self-exile, a protector. But none of these things helped keep my bed warm.

How many times did I cuddle with my pillow? How many times did I cuddle with Matthew? He still had real bad dreams of wonder bitch, Jane's power and needed someone to sleep with him to help keep the nightmares at bay.

What can I say, I like to cuddle.

I miss having a man with his arms wrapped around me, I miss hearing the sounds of a heart beat under my ear after I wake up to find myself using someone's chest as a pillow. I miss the warmth and the comfort of sharing a bed with a lover, not someone you consider a kid.

Taking care of Matthew these last two years had helped me keep all those feelings at bay. Even when the neighbors who took an interest in me tried to flirt I never had such a reaction to them. Many of them were good looking, or had good personalities. But the idea of being in a serious relationship with a human seemed to farfetched and risky.

But Fred was breaking down the dam where I kept all my womanly needs from the purely lustful to the need for a man to hold and cuddle. Was it because I had gotten to know him and shared with him my thoughts and feelings? Or was it simply the power of his vampire looks getting to me?

I had formed a bridge with him formed on trust, friendship, and pain. The pain we both know so well. The pain of losing a loved one, the pain of fear and uncertainty when you are alone in a hostile word with no one to back you up.

But in making this bridge had I left myself open to an invasion by a friendly force?

My body shuddered as my hands progressed down. Thinking about Fred made all kinds of fantasies running in my head. I imagined myself kissing that wonderful abs, running my fingers down them, remembering the feel of those cold hard muscles on my fingertips.

Things began to progress from there, the fantasy became more heated, more sensual. I cursed my body for turning on me now, things were just getting back to normal between me and Fred after Matthew went and opened that can of worms.

But now that I had seen the Fred beneath all that clothing, when we talked and I learned I was the first lucky one to see him naked and commented on that third leg of his. When I inadvertently let him know how much I enjoyed seeing him naked.

I know that there was no amount of time that could heal this wonderful wound. I knew that things would be very different now between us.

I growled low in my throat and decided to take care of the frustration my body now felt. I would have to wash myself thoroughly to make sure neither Fred nor Matthew could smell the scent of my release. There had been enough embarrassment to last a life time tonight.

* * *

Fred P.O.V

I always wondered how it was possible for a male vampire to get an erection without blood?

As me and Leah talked and she complemented my size I was shocked and horrified to find myself growing aroused.

I had been horrified and embarrassed at first but as Leah talked and I smelled the slight arousal wafting from the door I could not stop my body from reacting.

The idea that she liked what she saw caused a small form of pleasure to leak into the shock and embarrassment. I had been so quiet during our talk because I was trying to compose myself.

Luckily Matthew had announced he was done with his shower and Leah left. I breathed a sigh of relief. Her scent lingered though, a phantom reminder of how close and intimate we had just been.

I should have locked the door or turned the light on, surely if I had done that Leah would have figured I was in here when she saw the lights leaking from the cracks of the door.

I didn't have the lights on because vampires have excellent night vision. To me light and darkness were one in the same. I hardly ever used the lights because for me it was pointless. But I should have had the common sense to lock the door, I thought she would be helping Matthew clean himself, but why didn't I hear her coming?

The sound of her heart beat should have warned me, why hadn't I noticed it?

Now things would be more awkward then ever between us. How could I look her in the face knowing she had seen my most bare essentials?

I had turned the water all the way cold and did not even shiver. My body was still hard, I could still smell her scent, her arousal and I growled in my throat. It had been a long time since I had gave me release, but in the absence of anything else what else could I do?

* * *

Matthew P.O.V

I sat on my bed and smiled. I could sense dark pink coming from both Leah and Fred-Fred. My plan was working.

I knew Fred-Fred would be in other shower, I sensed him. Leah and he forget I can sense people when they are close enough, I sense Fred-Fred move from down stairs to up. Me know it time, this good opportunity. I hate to be sneaky with them but I need them to be together.

Using my power I made Fred unaware to his surroundings, I weave threads of ignorance and neglect around him. Then I told Leah I can wash myself. I prefer having Leah with me when I wash but I am fully capable of it.

I just like to me they think I am more dependent on them then I am. They forget I was living all by myself for a long time before they find me.

Leah leave and I listened closely, but I need not hear what happens when I sense it. I laugh quietly to myself as I sense their embarrassment and their desire.

Me not proud he manipulate them like this, but it only way we be happy together forever. Me and Fred never age, Leah only age when she wants. I don't want her to age, I want her to stay with us forever. If she and Fred give into their desires then she will stay immortal and we can all live together forever.

Me think about Leah growing old and wrinkly, her lovely black hair turning white and silver with time and one day her body giving in to death. That gives Matthew horrible feeling in his heart. The idea of watching her slowly die makes me so sad.

These little tricks I am pulling on them is taking longer than it would if I use power on Leah and Fred-Fred, but me would never do that to them. Why make them love one another when I can make it happen naturally.

Who knows, by the time we return to Forks Leah and Fred may already be together. Life is good for me now, we will return to our friends in Forks, Leah can see her friends and family and her and Fred-Fred and me can spend our lives as a family. Big brother Nahuel and his aunt can come and visit us and we can have family picnics and celebrate holidays together.

I laid down and covered myself with the blankets on my bed. I am feeling tired now, lots of fun with Fred-Fred and Leah in the woods and rain to. So tired now. Me go to sleep.

* * *

_Matthew's dream_

_I dream I am walking through the jungle, it is day and the air is very humid and I can hear the distant sounds of animals. The jungle is louder during the night, when the predators are running wild and looking for prey._

_I came across a large stream, I lean down and take a sip from it. I look in my reflection and see I am not alone. There is a familiar girl with me, she wears a white dress and has long black curly hair and skin a little lighter than mine. She smiles at me and I look up at her._

" _Morphia?" I ask._

" _Hello Matthew." she bent down and kissed me on the cheek. "I missed you."_

" _Morphia, you have gotten taller," I said._

" _I grow very quickly Matthew."_

" _I do to," I said._

_She smiled. "I can't wait to meet you Matthew, the others talk about you so much, and we are all excited to meet you. And when you come back to us everyone will be happy and we will be whole."_

" _What do you mean?" I ask._

_She smiled. "You will see soon Matthew."_

_She disappeared from where she stood and I wonder what she meant. Then I decide to swim in the river like I did when I was younger and soon I forgot all about Morphia and her words. After all it was just a dream, right?_

* * *

Joham P.O.V

"Father, I have prepared the others," Seraphina said.

I looked up at her from my desk. "Good, when will you reach Priddis?" I asked.

"Late tomorrow night, after we acquire Matthew we will sneak him onto the private jet, which will fly us back here. Hypnia will keep him sedated the entire time so he does not cause a problem."

"Very well done Seraphina, will you take Brand with you? I know she has been dying to prove her worth," I said.

"No, she will remain here and continue her studies, her father spoils her to much," she said with a frown.

"You cannot blame him, he never thought he would have a child, none of us did, until I learned the secret," I said.

"Father, if Matthew proves to be difficult what will we do?"

"What do you mean?"

"According to what Morphia has learned Matthew has developed strong attachments to this Leah and Fred. He may seek to return to them when he finds where he is."

"Yes, I have considered that possibility. I do not blame him for wanting to return, they are his coven now. But I am his father and I will reclaim what is mine. If he proves to be too fond of them then we will have Rosemary modify his memory, it would not be the first time we have had to do it."

"As you wish father."

She turned and left leaving me to my thoughts. Things were coming together, soon the army made from my seed would be ready, with Matthew on our side our power will be magnified beyond comparison and we will strike back at the Volturi for what they did and just as they usurped the Romanians they too will be replaced by a new power.

Me.

**Fusedtwilight: Next chapter Fred and Leah have a lot of tension to deal with and Matthew's family come to claim him. Will Leah be able to protect Matthew or will she lose him forever?**


	19. Chapter 19

Focused Madness

Chapter 19

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing. This chapter Matthew's family come to claim him. Will Leah be able to protect him.**

 

Alice P.O.V

My anxiety had not diminished at all since Leah told us she and Matthew were coming home. With each passing hour it seemed to increase.

It was getting to the point that no matter how much he tried Jasper could not even keep me calm. I had this terrible feeling that I had forgotten something of grave importance.

But how could I forget something? Vampires don't forget.

My thoughts kept on turning to Leah and Matthew; they were the source of my unease. I felt fear for them and I had no damned idea why.

I felt like I was a doll in an hourglass and every second brought disaster closer and closer.

We were in the living room with Emmett and Rose. Everyone was so happy that Leah and Matthew were returning. We were watching Fire starter on TV.

It was almost over. Drew Barrymore's character was starting to go pyro-psychotic on the people who had kept her prisoner. As she used her powers to cause complete devastation I had this scene before. Some place close by.

"Alice are you okay?" Jasper asked sensing my confusion.

Then it hit me. I realized what I had forgotten. Two years ago before we knew what he could do Matthew caused my power to grow so powerful I was having so many visions I was catatonic.

I had lost the majority of them, my mind unable to cope with all that information. But watching the movie brought back the vision I had all those years ago.

_I remember the hybrid girls standing in line behind one with black hair, her eyes were a fiery blue. One of the hybrid girls held a figure in their arms. I did not recognize Matthew at first because he had grown up so much since I last saw him._

_The girl in the front raised her hand. Pointing it at a house. I saw the front door was broken, I could see Leah getting up, she was naked and her left side was badly burned._

" _Seraphina you could have hurt Matthew," the one holding Matthew chastised._

_The woman smiled a cold smile and flames erupted from her hand. The fire covered the front of the house. She moved her arm and the jet of fire moved with her engulfing the entire front house._

" _Let's go," the black haired fire wielder said._

_They all turned and disappeared into the darkness. Taking Matthew with them and leaving Leah to burn in the house which was now engulfed in flame._

"Oh god!"

"Alice what is it?" Jasper asked sensing my horror.

"I can't believe I forgot, we have to call Leah now! We have to warn her!"

"Warn her of what? I thought you can't see wolves in your visions?" Emmett asked.

"When Matthew increased our powers years ago I was able to see wolves and hybrids and I was able to see years in the future. I had so many visions I forgot about this one but ever since Carlisle told us Leah and Matthew were coming back I have had this horrible feeling something was going to happen."

"What did you see?" Rose asked.

"Matthew's sisters found him, that one Seraphina was leading them. She torched the house they are living in and I saw Leah was inside when it went up."

Emmett quickly grabbed his cell and began making the calls.

"Wait I thought his sister was dead?" Rose asked.

"She must have survived somehow," Jasper said.

"If she did then did Joham?"

"I don't know. I can't see him at all," I said.

"But if he is surrounded by hybrids then you wouldn't be able to."

"Oh I can't believe I forgot, but there was so much, too much I couldn't remember it all."

"No one is blaming you Alice," Jasper said firmly, "at least now we can warn them."

"Afraid not," Emmett said. "Carlisle doesn't have her number. She uses a private line when she calls."

"What do we do? We can't just let them take him and kill Leah," Rose said.

"Alice, try using your visions to find them. Remember you were able to find Nahuel that way," Jasper said.

"But that took weeks," I said.

"Just try," he said.

I did my best and focused. I thought of Leah, of Matthew. I tried my best to try and get some hint of their location but I got nothing. So instead I tried to look for places that were blind spots in my visions. That would take longer but I had to do something.

"Carlisle is calling the wolves right now to let them know to be ready at any moment," Emmett said.

A few hours later every single wolf was at our house. I had to leave because they were distracting me. I went to Bella and Edward's cottage to focus. It was a big world and I figured Leah and Matthew had to be somewhere north. So I looked north.

Had I been able to see hybrids and werewolves I would have spotted them right away. Once again I cursed my power for not being able to see them. What was the point of having visions if there were going to be blind spots?

Jasper stayed with me the entire time. Keeping me calm and focused so I could try and find some place I could not see.

I know the others were trying to figure out a way to find them, but we had no way. No scent, no clues. Leah had done to well a job at staying hidden from us all.

Finally I got tired of trying to find them and ran back to the house. Both Jake and Sam's pack were here. I arrived in time to hear Sam suggest we find Alistair and use him to track Leah.

"There is no time," I said, "he lives in England and the vision I had shows that it happens soon, like tonight."

Sam growled at me. "I thought you said you couldn't see us?"

"I can't but years ago Matthew made my power so strong I temporarily lost those restrictions. But there were so many visions I forgot it," I growled back.

I was in no mood to be blamed for this. I was already feeling bad. I had seen so many things. Many of them were so horrific I was glad to forget them. I remembered a great deal of them of course. It was like my head had been so full of info the vision didn't resurface until the right time.

"What about Fred? Surely he can protect Leah with his power," Seth said.

"But he wasn't in my vision," I said.

"Why not? Could something have happened to him?" Jake asked.

"Maybe one of Matthew's sisters got him," Quil said.

"How is that possible? His power would have protected him," Jared said.

"What if he was out hunting when they showed up?" Edward suggested.

"Don't forget the possibility these girls are gifted. This Seraphina can create fire, Rosemary can manipulate memories. Who knows what else Joham's spawn can do," Jasper said.

"But how the hell did they find them when we can't?" Sam asked.

"One of them must be some kind of tracker," Carlisle said.

"Alice have you had any luck?" Carlisle asked.

"I have tried, she isn't in Washington, Oregon, or California. But that is all I can know."

"What are we going to do?" Seth asked looking panicked.

I don't blame him. Had it been any of my sisters I had seen being burned alive I would be scared as well.

"Don't worry Seth, we'll figure something out," Jake said putting a comforting hand on Seth's shoulder.

"Wait, can't you hear her Jake?" Emmett asked.

"No. She has left my pack," Jake said.

"But you can hear Sam."

"Because he is an alpha."

"But how do you know it won't work for Leah? I mean if she is a lone wolf she is her own alpha right? I mean have you ever tried to contact her in wolf form?"

"No, but I will try."

"Good thinking Em," Rose said.

Jake left the house to phase.

"He is trying," Edward said. "He hears nothing."

"She might not be in wolf form," Emmett said.

"He says he will stay in wolf form and try and contact her," Edward said.

"What shall the rest of us do?" Esme asked looking worried.

"We wait, that is all we can do," Carlisle said.

"This would never had happened if you hadn't brought him here!" Sam said.

"Oh, come on Sam, don't star that again," Seth said. "Leah left because she knew you would try and kill him."

"Yeah, for trying to kill my imprint!"

"Yeah well whose smart idea was it to have said imprint there?" Quil asked.

Quil and Embry had joined Seth, glaring at Sam, clearly showing whose side they were on. Paul and Jared stood behind Sam glaring back showing whose side they were on. The wolves from Sam's pack stood behind him, some looked like they agreed with Sam, others looked nervous. The same kind of nervous look a child gets when their parents are fighting.

These wolves were still young. Twelve at the oldest. Some younger but not by much.

"Let's worry less about what happened in the past and worry more about the future," Carlisle said keeping things calm.

"All we can do now is hope Jake can get through to Leah or better yet she calls us. Otherwise, all we can do is wait. Alice will continue to search for Leah by finding the areas that are blind spots for her."

Esme decided to cook for the wolves. It helped break the tension and many of the pups seemed relieved to be able to escape the glare match going on between Seth and Sam.

I left the house; Jake was right outside, a look of concentration on his face. I nodded to him as I passed and got as far as I needed to see right. I then started to try and see any blind spots again. Then I got an idea. I was so stupid! I was too busy trying to find Matthew and Leah when I should be trying to find the one person they had with them who I could see.

Fred.

* * *

Fred P.O.V

Dinner was a very quiet and awkward affair. Two nights later and Leah and I had barely said a word to one another.

Matthew knew something was up but he kept quiet, to which I was very thankful. No mention was made to the incident but it hung in the air.

Leah and Matthew ate their food silently. I sat at the table as usual. Normally we would be talking but no one spoke. I hated this. Everything was so damned awkward now. I wish things could be back to normal again, before me and Leah started to become more aware of one another, before she saw me naked.

I still don't get how I didn't notice her coming. The sound of her heart beat alone should have warned me.

Matthew cleared his throat. "So Leah when are we going back to Forks?" he asked.

"Soon. We still have to pack everything and I have to let everyone know we are moving."

"I am excited; I can't wait to see how much Nessie has grown."

"She is two now, I wonder how much she has grown."

"When we get back we should contact big brother Nahuel. Maybe he can live with us too."

"I don't think that would work out Matthew," Leah said.

A part of me was thankful she said that. The idea of this Nahuel joining our family made something in me snarl. Ridiculous seeing how I never met him but knowing he and Leah were together made some part of me feel all territorial and I don't think it is vampire instincts.

"Why not?" Matthew asked sounding sad.

"Because Nahuel and his aunt drink human blood and you know the rules."

"Maybe we can get them to convert?"

"I doubt it. We'll discuss this later. Now eat your peas."

Matthew's face turned into a frown. "I hate peas, they taste yucky."

I got up to leave. I could not take this anymore, I had to leave. "I will be back, I need to hunt."

"But you just hunted last night," Leah said.

"Well I need more," I said making an excuse to leave.

I got up and headed for the front door. I just began to turn the knob when I heard Leah walking up behind me. "Fred, wait."

I sighed and turned to face her. "What is it Leah?" I asked.

"Fred this is stupid. Just because I saw you naked is no reason for us to be acting like this," she said.

"Acting like what?"

"Don't even try and act like that Fred, you know what I mean. This sucks. We shouldn't be ignoring each other. So what, I saw you naked. Roommates walk in on one another all the time."

"This is different though."

"How?"

"...You know why," I whispered.

"...Because we have feelings for one another."

I sighed again, feeling frustrated. "Yes Leah, because _we_ have feelings for one another. I know you were more affected by it then you let on, I smelled your arousal."

Her cheeks became flushed. "Fucking vampire sense of smell," she muttered.

"The thing is I became excited. When you saw me naked and I smelled your scent I loved it, more than I should have."

"When you say excited-"

"I mean I was aroused too."

"Oh."

She looked away, her cheeks turned a shade redder.

"Exactly, Leah."

"Nothing to be ashamed about, were both young and good looking."

"But it is a problem Leah. I am a vampire, you are a werewolf. You have already told me you don't want to live forever. I don't have a choice in the matter, I am going to live until something or someone comes along and rips me apart and burns the pieces. What hope do we have?"

"So what? We're just supposed to act all awkward because there is this attraction to one another?" she asked. "I like you to Fred. You get me. You don't try to pry into my head or try and make me feel better like my brothers did. You give me my space and let me be and I love that. You have so much patience with me even when I am in one of my moods and you don't yell at me when you should. You are smart, sophisticated, calm, rational and god damn it if you were just human this would be so much easier!"

"Would it?" I asked. "If I was human could we really be together?"

"Yes, I have never wanted to be with someone like this since Sam. I don't mean just physically. I mean all the little things we do. Eating together, watching TV together, hunting together, talking to one another about the weather or about that new Starbucks they are building or who will win the game. All the little things we do I like doing so much. Every time I am coming home from work I think I can't wait to see Matthew and Fred. You have become an important part of my life and you didn't even mean to."

I stepped forward and brought a hand up to her face. She seemed hotter than normal.

"Leah, I care about you too, more than I should. But I am so afraid. We don't have the power of an imprint to bind us together. What if we try to make this into something more and it all comes crashing down around us? I don't want to ruin what we have. You and Matthew mean to much for me to risk it all."

"It would break his heart if we fell apart," she said.

"I know. I don't want to hurt either of you, even accidentally. But it seems no matter what I chose someone will get hurt. But I can't keep on ignoring what is between us. Because I love the things we do Leah. I have told you before I love how strong and willful you are. You are not like any woman I have ever met. So independent, so head strong."

"So what do we do? We can't keep ignoring one another," she said.

"I know. I need to go out. I need time to think," I said.

"Then what?"

"I don't know."

I kissed her on the cheek and she stiffened in surprise. My lips seemed to burn even after they left her skin and they felt tingly.

"I'll be back Leah. We'll talk more later."

I opened the door and walked out. I headed out into the woods, looking for something to drink, something to help ease my mind and help me think. I considered finding a bear or some big game prey. They taste better and put up a better fight then the herbivores. I need to vent on something bad.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

I gently ran my hand over Matthew's hair as he laid his head on my lap. It was a few hours since Fred left. Matthew had not spoken in that time, highly unusual.

I was too concerned about the situation with Fred. When did I start seeing him as more than a vampire? More than a friend? How could I let it happen? I mean he is a vampire for crying out loud. It's like a mongoose going out with a snake.

Figures, the one guy I find who I can move on with and he is dead and drinks blood. Why are all the good men gay, married, or vampires?

"Leah you are thinking a lot right now," Matthew said.

"There is a lot to think of Matthew," I said.

"Me sorry."

"What for?"

"If I didn't tell Fred-Fred about his feelings and your feelings none of this be happening," he said.

"It was already there Matthew, I am sure it would have happened sooner or later," I said.

"Why can't everyone be the same? Why do we have to be different?" he asked. "If everyone were the same there would be no confusion or fear."

"That is just how the world works Matthew. People are different. If we weren't different then we wouldn't have met."

"I am happy we met Leah. You make me happy. You and Fred-Fred." he was quiet for a moment, but when he next spoke his voice was more cautious. "Hey Leah."

"Yes?"

"I was wondering. You know how the Cullens have last names? And Fred-Fred has a last name and you have a last name?"

"Yes."

"Well, I want a last name too."

I was curious as to why this was making him so tense. I was delighted he wanted a last name. He taking a last name seemed to make him seem more human in a way.

"What do you want it to be?" I asked.

"Clearwater."

I froze. "What?"

He got up, sitting on his knees. "I want to be Matthew Clearwater."

"Matthew Clearwater?"

He nodded.

"Why?"

He hugged me, his hands wrapped around my chest and he pressed his head to my heart. Then I felt it. Something so powerful and pure. Something I had only felt in small doses before but now I am overflowing with it.

Love.

I knew Matthew loved me on some level, but I was never aware it was to this level. He always told me how much he loved me, but until this moment I was unable to fully comprehend just how much.

"Matthew?"

"This is what I feel for you Leah. I love you and I want to be with you forever. I want to be a better person for you. I want to go to school and college and get diplomas and degrees and make friends and get job's and make money and learn how to speak better and make myself a better person for you Leah. I want to take all the joy, the happiness, the delight, the pleasure, the warmth and all the other happy feelings of the world and wrap it around you. I never want you to be sad again. You have made me so happy, but I was not happy once, I was alone and scared but then you came and saved me."

I wanted to argue it was Carlisle and the Cullens who did that. But the feeling of Matthew using his power to share his love for me made me unable to speak.

"I know you have been through so much, you have known loss and pain, Matthew was drawn to you because you and me are the only ones who know what it is like to lose the ones we love. We know what it is like to be hurt by people we trust, we know what it is like to be alone. But then we find one another and we not alone or sad anymore. When we go back to Forks I want everyone to see I am different, that I have changed. I want to go back with a name that gives me love and strength. I want your name Leah because I love you and I want to be a better person for you."

A sob escaped my mouth. All the doubt and unease I was feeling about Fred was washed away in a wondrous feeling of love. Matthew's love for me.

Normally I am not one to cry, but the tears started to roll down my cheeks, falling onto the top of his head. Never before have had I felt so loved. The only ones who ever came this close were Sam before he imprinted and my family. But even they never made me feel like this.

Or maybe they had. Matthew was using his power to give me a direct link to all this wonderful love. I knew Seth loved me a lot from our link, I knew Sam _did_ love me with great passion once. But there love paled in comparison to Matthew's. There was nothing sexual about it. It was so pure, so absolute. It was like the love that bound Quil and Claire only not binding because it was not forged by imprinting, but none the less it was just as powerful.

I hugged Matthew tight. In that moment when he exposed me to his love, mine grew a little more for him. No, not a little more. A lot more.

I knew in that moment that I had done the absolute right thing in taking him from Forks. If I filled him with this much love and made him want to make a better person of himself then I had to have done the right thing.

"I think Matthew Clearwater has a nice ring to it," I said.

He brought a hand up to my cheek and wiped away some of the tears. He licked his hand. "Leah, your tears taste happy."

"That's because I am happier then I have ever been baby," I said.

He hugged me again. "Mommy," he whispered.

Before I could say anything he sat up. He looked to the side like he heard something. "Matthew what's wrong?"

"Something is coming."

"What?"

"When Fred left I made a web to keep out everyone but you and Fred-Fred."

"So shouldn't it keep them away?" I asked.

"That's the thing, when I made the web I only designed it to keep out vampires, humans and werewolves. I didn't want to scare away the animals so we could have something to eat. But the web wasn't designed to keep out other hybrids."

* * *

Alice P.O.V

"Got him!" I screamed.

"Where is he?" Jasper asked.

"I don't know, he is somewhere in a forest, he looks angry about something."

Another vision hit me then.

_Fred was walking at a human pace. But then there was a loud boom. He looked up and saw a pillar of fire rise in the sky. "Leah, Matthew!"_

_He then ran as fast as he could. He headed for the direction of the blast. The closer he got the closer he could see the fire. By the time he got back the house was on fire. "Leah! Matthew!" he screamed._

_He ran into the house and then I saw nothing._

"Oh no, we're too late!"

Matthew P.O.V

I got up and ran to the front door.

Leah followed me, concern and worry had filled her aura now.

"Matthew, do you mean hybrids are coming our way?" she asked.

"Yes, they are."

"They?"

I opened the front door and stepped out. It was a nice cool night out. I stepped out, the grass was covered in a fine mist that made my feet wet.

Leah followed behind me but I was too busy paying attention to the direction the hybrids were coming from. When they passed through my web I tasted them. They tasted female and very familiar.

"It can't be," I said.

"What is it Matthew?"

"My sisters, they are alive."

"What!"

I heard the sound of fast beating hearts. Then they came from the woods in a diamond formation. Rosemary, Hypnia, Sarah, Mia, and leading them were Seraphina.

They stopped about twenty paces from the house. I couldn't believe I was seeing them, all these years and I thought they were all dead. But here they were their auras showed satisfaction and a sense of victory.

"Matthew," Seraphina called, "brother, we have found you at last."

"Seraphina? I thought you were dead," I said.

"Rumors of my demise were greatly exaggerated little brother."

"But the Volturi, they came and attacked."

"That they did and we lost many of our sisters to them."

A sense of loss washed over my sisters. They still felt the pain of losing our fallen kin.

"Who?" I asked.

"Catherine, Sophia, Terri, Odett, Vera, Virgo, just to name a few."

Memories flashed, fuzzy through the pain, but with each name came a memory, a face. My heart hurt. I had hoped they had all survived. How many of my sisters had fallen? But how many had survived.

"How did you find us?" Leah asked. She was tense and afraid, I could see it.

Seraphina finally looked at Leah. When she did her eyes went round with shock. The others were looking at Leah now, a few let out a hiss of disbelief. Disbelief, confusion, shock, recognition all glowed from each of my sisters. They looked like they had seen a ghost. I was confused why, they had never seen Leah and to my knowledge have never met a werewolf.

"Who are you?" Seraphina demanded, her eyes narrowed. I did not like the look she was giving Leah, it was hard and cold.

The wind blew in their direction. My sisters made gagging sounds and covered their faces. "Whoever she is she smells horrible," Hypnia said.

"This is Leah." I took her hand in mine and I radiated calm to everyone. "She protects me and loves me."

"I'll ask again, how did you find us?" Leah asked.

"One of our family members is gifted. She can enter the world of dreams and interact with dreamers," Seraphina said.

"My daughter, Morphia," Hypnia said with pride.

"Daughter? You have a daughter? And it's Morphia?" I asked.

"Yes Matthew, we have been looking for you for a long time," Rosemary said, "we were beginning to lose hope we would see you again when she found you in your dreams."

"So hybrids can procreate?" Leah asked changing the subject.

"We can. Despite our immortality we still have menstrual cycles. Father has been trying to figure out how we never age but our bodies can create life."

"So I am an uncle?" I asked giddy at the thought. Uncle Matthew had a nice ring to it.

"Yes you are brother. We may have lost our sisters but we have gained such wondrous babies in return," Mia said.

"Who's the father?" Leah asked.

"Fathers," Sarah said, "we may be sisters but we don't share everything."

"Come Matthew, the family is waiting, our sons and daughters are impatiently waiting to meet their uncle." Seraphina held out her hand.

I did not move. As much as I wanted to meet my new family members I did not want to leave Leah. Maybe they would let her and Fred-Fred come.

"Matthew, come, everyone is waiting," Seraphina said. Impatience began to bleed in her aura. She smiled and it was calm. "Father is waiting."

"Daddy?" I stepped forward, but I did not let go of Leah's hand. "Daddy is alive?"

"Yes Matthew and he has missed you so terribly."

"Hold on a sec, you are not taking him anywhere," Leah said.

Seraphina glared at Leah and I shivered. I had seen Seraphina glare at something and then the something would burst into flame. Seraphina had never been one of my favorite sisters. She was always so cold; her aura was never as bright as the others. She scared me.

"This has nothing to do with you girl."

"The fuck it doesn't, I have been looking after him for little over two years now. I have every right. Last time you had him you lost him. He had to wonder the world all alone. By the time we found him he was feral, dirty and was severely mentally damaged. What makes you think I am going to let him go with you?"

"He is our brother."

"So? He barely even remembers you."

"What?"

"Yeah." Leah turned to look at Rosemary, "remember Jane?"

Rosemary flinched. "I try not to."

"Well her power shattered his mind, he had no memory of his past and the only thing he could remember was his name and the pain. His mind is still recovering from her attack, and now you want me to just hand him over?"

"Rosemary, what happened? Why did you leave Matthew alone?" I asked her.

"I am so sorry Matthew. When we were getting ready to hide-"

"You mean when you were wiping his mind," Leah interrupted.

Rosemary glared at her. "How do you know all this?"

"Matthew has remembered some hints of his past. Not everything, but bits and pieces."

I sensed secrecy in her. She wanted to keep something secret. She wasn't lying to them, but she didn't want to go into greater detail about something.

Seraphina smiled. "It was the Cullens who helped him remember wasn't it?"

I felt Leah jerk in response, surprise danced around her aura.

"No point in denying it, we know all about the Cullens. The vampires with a heart, who deny their nature and only drink animal blood. Sounds disgusting," Sarah said.

"It's not so bad after a while," I said.

"You have been drinking animal blood?" Rosemary said sounding disgusted.

"It would make Leah mad if I drank human blood and me not want to make Leah mad because Leah is taking care of me's and me not want to be a bad person so me is drinking animal blood."

"Why is he talking like that?" Mia asked confused.

"Well when Rosemary was fucking with his mind Jane showed up and used her power on him. In reflex his power activated and it made her gift stronger. It broke his mind," Leah said.

Rosemary looked ashamed. "I remember. I was enacting father's plan. Should the Volturi were ever to attack I was to wipe Matthew's mind and go into hiding with him. During the process Jane appeared and before I knew it I was feeling such a horrible pain. Then there was screaming and I felt a powerful wave of fear and I ran."

"We found her two days later," Seraphina said.

"Took us months or rehabilitation before she was finally cognate," Sarah said.

"We figure Jane's power made stronger by Matthew's gift and Matthew instinctively used his power to repel what he perceived as danger," Mia said.

"Thank you for taking care of him, I am sure father will see you are compensated. But we will be taking him now. Father sent us to fetch him. Matthew come," Seraphina said.

"Can Leah come with us?" I asked.

"What?"

"Leah, I want her to come with us. Her and Fred-Fred."

"Fred-Fred?"

"A vampire who lives with us," Leah said.

"No, she may not come with us, she is not family."

"She's my family."

I held Leah's hand tightly.

"Matthew loves Leah and Fred-Fred. I am wanting them to meet daddy and our family."

Things were starting to get tense now. My sisters aura were getting nervous. All except Seraphina. As usual she was calm and cold.

"Enough of this. Hypnia."

I knew what she was going to do before she did it. Leah let go of my hand and phased. I had told her what Hypnia could do.

She stood in front of my sisters and growled at them. "Leah wait don't hurt them!"

I stood in front of her. I didn't want anyone to get hurt, Leah or my sisters. I loved Leah and my sisters, I didn't want anyone to get hurt.

Then a wave of extreme sleep and exhaustion washed over me.

"….Le...ah..."

I feel on my back, the stars twinkled in the night sky. The last image I saw before the darkness took me, was Leah. She was nuzzling me with her nose, she whined and then I knew nothing.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

Matthew fell asleep in front of me, I knew it was his sisters doing.

I looked up at them and growled. I was about to pounce when I heard a voice in my head.

" _Leah!"_

" _Jake?"_

" _Leah thank god! Listen you are in danger!"_

" _No shit! Matthew's sisters are here to take him away!"_

" _What!"_

" _Yeah, they knocked him out, Fred is out hunting I am all alone!"_

" _Where are you?"_

" _Canada, Alberta. A hamlet called Priddis."_

" _We're on our way!"_

" _You'll never make it in time!"_

" _Just hold on Leah we are coming!"_

Seraphina stepped forward and I growled at her. I stood over Matthew, protecting him from them. She smiled at me. "Thank you for protecting him. We appreciate what you have done for our family."

She balled her hands into fists and her arms were engulfed in fire. She raised her hand and a jet shot out. I stood in front of Matthew instinctively.

I still had a connection to Jake. So I sent him a single thought.

" _Jake, save Matthew, and tell mom and Seth I love them!"_

" _Leah no!"_

A searing pain hit my side. I howled in pain and I was sent flying backward. I slammed into the front door. It shattered into splinters. My fur was on fire and I phased back. I held my side. Burns were tricky for us to heal. They still heal a bit quicker then they would for normal folk but they healed slower then say a broken bone or a cut.

But it hurt like a son of a bitch. I tried to get up but the pain shook my body.

"Seraphina you could have hurt Matthew!" I heard Rosemary chastise.

I tried standing up and saw she held Matthew's unconscious body. Seraphina was smiling at me, it was a cold heartless smile.

She raised her arm and I knew what was about to happen. I got up as quick as I could and tried to run. There was a sound of something shooting through the air and the world exploded around me in fire and darkness.

_Matthew._

 

**Fusedtwilight: Oh no! Joham has Matthew now and Leah is stuck in a burning building! Will she survive? Next chapter, the hunt for Matthew begins and Matthew meets the fathers of his nieces and nephews. Please review.**


	20. Chapter 20

Focused Madness

Chapter 20

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing.**

**Last chapter Leah and Matthew had a surprise visit by his sisters. This chapter Matthew meets his father again, we find out who has been helping Joham and Leah and Fred retreat to Forks to plane their next move.**

Distress: A painful situation, pain or suffering affecting the body or mind.

Example: Fred is quit distressed when he arrives home.

Fred P.O.V

I would always regret not being there that night for them. I promised I would be there for them, protect them. But I was too self-absorbed with my own issues that I allowed what happened come to pass.

I was in the woods, thinking about my future with Leah and Matthew, unaware the future had already been decided. There was the sound of an explosion. I looked up and saw a pillar of flames erupt into the sky.

I knew from the location the fire came from where the house was.

"Leah! Matthew!" I ran back to the house. I ran as fast as I could, I wished I was still a newborn because I would have been much, much faster.

As I ran close to the house I could see the fire burning through the trees. I ran as fast as I could, I had never run this fast before. I caught the scent of something similar to Matthew.

_Hybrids._

There was only one reason why I was catching hybrid scents. Female, hybrid scents.

The house was completely enveloped in fire. It lit up the sky with its light. I felt a flash of fury directed at whoever did this. I had good memories in this house, it was the start of my new life, the home I had made for myself with Leah and Matthew and now it was burning in front of me.

The female scents were very fresh now, but I smelled Matthew with them. I was confused. Why would Matthew have left with his sisters? I know he would not have left without Leah, even if it was his sisters.

I smelled Leah as well, as well as the disturbing smell of burned flesh. Leah's flesh. I focused and could hear the sound of a heart beating in the fire.

"LEAH!"

I ran into the house. The front door was collapsed by debris. I plowed right through it; it crumbled against my body like a cookie soaked in milk. Fire was only dangerous to vampires if we were ripped apart. Otherwise we need not fear it.

So many memories I made in this house. Now it was all going up in flames. My vampire sense of touch made the fire seem like I was in the center of the sun. With the smell of Leah's burning flesh and the inferno around me I feared the worst.

I followed the sound of her heart beat and found her in the kitchen. For as long as I lived I would remember the image I saw before me. Leah was curled into a fetal position, she was naked and she was covered in horrible burns. I quickly grabbed her in my arms and ran outside. There was a huge explosion and the house began to collapse.

It was a good thing I got there in time, I doubt Leah would have survived. I laid her gently on the ground. Her heart was weak but still beating. Had she been human she would have not survived these burns. I had studied severe burns when I was in college. A human would be dead.

I knew she was going to be in a lot of pain. The majority of her left side was blackened from being burned.

"Leah, come on Leah please wake up," I said gently shaking her.

Her eye fluttered open. She groaned in pain and it tore my heart up to hear her. "Fred?" she said in a weak raspy voice.

"It's okay Leah, I am here now," I said gently.

I inspected her burns. God these burns are so severe. Should I worry about infection? Leah told me wolves never get sick but with the condition of her skin…

"God, Fred, it hurts," she whimpered, tears fell down her face and her body shook.

"I know, I know, we'll get you better. Leah, what happened? I smelled hybrids and Matthew is with them?"

"Matthew? Oh God Matthew! Fred, they took Matthew! His sisters they came and took him!"

She tried to move but I stopped her. "I thought they were dead?"

"Well the bitch's survived." she looked over at the house and there was pain in her eyes. Not physical, but emotional, like me she was feeling the pain of losing our home.

I could hear the sound of cars rushing down the road from miles away. "Leah we need to go," I said.

"We need to call the Cullen's, we have to find Matthew. We have to find him before...they..."

She fell unconscious. I picked her up and ran to the Volvo. Leah keeps the door unlocked, all the way out in a hamlet like Priddis and you need not worry about someone stealing your car.

I put her in the passenger seat and gave her my shirt and jacket to cover her nakedness. Sadly the key was still in the house, most likely melted. Luckily I knew how to hot wire a car. A little something I picked up in a book I read.

I tore out down the road, a small group of cars passed us. I recognized Lance in his truck. He stopped as did I. He rolled down his window, his face looked panicked.

"Fred, what in the hell is going on?"

"I don't know, I need to get Leah to the hospital!"

"Leah? Is she okay?"

He leaned over to look for her. I saw from the look of disgust and horror he saw her.

"My God! Is she still alive?"

"Yes, I need to get her to the hospital!"

"What about Matthew?"

"I don't know."

I want to be finding him, I wanted to find him so bad but I had to take care of Leah. Then with the Cullen's help we would find Matthew.

"Lance I have to go."

"Okay, you take care of her, call me when you get her some help, I need to go help with the others."

He took off, following the others to help put out the fire. I continued to drive, heading straight for Forks. I reached under the seat and found a cell. Leah kept it in the Volvo for emergencies. I dialed the Cullen's and someone picked up on the first ring.

"Hello?" it was Carlisle.

"Carlisle, we have been attacked!"

"I know, is Leah okay?"

"No, she is badly burned. She isn't healing as quick as she should be, I think it must be because of the burns."

"Burns?"

I told him her condition.

"Blast, the wolves are susceptible to burns. Jake, Sam, and the wolves have already left."

"How did they know where we were?"

"Jake can communicate with other alphas. Since Leah is a lone wolf we had hoped he could contact her. Alice had a late vision of the attack and we were unable to contact you."

"What about Matthew? Have you any idea where he is?"

"No."

"Carlisle what are we going to do?"

"I will call Jake and have them come back. Get here as soon as you can, I will have everything ready. Keep an eye on Leah, if her condition changes call me and let me know."

"I will. But what about Matthew?"

"Alice can't see hybrids in her visions. The vision she had was one she had years ago when Matthew jump started her power, but it was buried until recently."

"Can't she remember anything else?"

"She is trying."

"I am coming straight to Forks."

"We will see you soon."

I hanged up and checked up on Leah again. She was still asleep. I had to roll the window down a little because the smell of baking werewolf flesh was to much for me to handle.

I was going way over the speed limit, but I was using my power to the max to keep any animals from jumping out from the middle of the road and to keep any human police man from pulling me over. The quicker I got Leah help the quicker we could find Matthew.

My fists clenched the wheel tight and a growl rumbled deep in my chest.

"Hold on Matthew, we'll find you."

And when we do I will personally make you an only child.

* * *

_Matthew's dream_

_I was running through the jungle. Something was chasing me. I was so afraid. If it caught me I would die._

_I ran behind a tree and held my breath, my heart beat so hard I feared the beast could hear it. I heard nothing._

_I came around the tree, trying to find the beast. Instead I found Morphia._

_She was definitely taller. She looked like she grew a few years older. She looked like she was my age now. She wore a little red dress, with a red hat and a rose on the side. She made me think of little red riding hood on her way to the ball._

" _Hello uncle Matthew," she said waving at me._

" _You!" I pointed an angry finger at her. Surprise and a little bit of fear shined in her aura. "You lied to me!"_

" _I never once lied to you uncle Matthew," she said crossing her arms. Offense shined in her aura now._

" _You never told me Hypnia was your mother!"_

" _You never asked."_

" _You purposely hid the truth from me! Because of you Seraphina could be hurting Leah now."_

" _Oh don't be so dramatic, Aunt Seraphina wouldn't hurt a fly."_

_I looked at her incredulously. "Are you nuts! Seraphina is daddy's most dangerous daughter! All she has to do is blink her eyes and something erupts in fire!"_

" _Well I am sure this Leah will be fine."_

" _You don't understands," I cried. "Leah won't let them take mes and me won't be theres to protect her and Leah will be burned and it will be Matthew's fault because me is telling you where we were being and-"_

_I feel to my knees and cried. Tears fell to the ground. Morphia walked up to me and kneeled down. "Relax uncle Matthew, everything will be fine."_

_I blinked and looked at her. "Why do you look so much older? Hybrids don't age that fast."_

_She smiled. "because I am only a quarter human. We age much faster than hybrids who are half and half, chances are I will mature before you do.."_

" _Quarter human?"_

" _My father is a vampire. The vampire blood is stronger in me then you."_

_I remembered my sisters telling me about my nieces and nephews._

" _How many are you?"_

" _Oh there is a lot of us." she got up and twirled in her dress. "We are all so excited to finally meet you Uncle Matthew. We have heard so much about you. Grandfather is so happy you are coming home."_

" _Grandfather?...You mean daddy?"_

" _Yes, he is waiting for you Matthew." she took my hands in hers. Her aura was one of pure delight. "Grandfather has such planes for your Uncle Matthew. Big planes, important planes. You will be the catalyst the brings forth the new world. You will be the one that will build the foundations for our family."_

" _Me?"_

" _Yes you silly. You have no idea how truly powerful you are uncle. But soon you will be with us and we will be a family. We will dance and play and be merry forever and ever."_

" _But what about Leah?"_

" _What about her? We are your family Matthew, blood calls to blood. Besides you were always destined for greater things."_

" _But I don't want greater things, I want Leah!"_

" _You have responsibilities now uncle. Do as grandfather tells you and you will see her again."_

_The dream began to become fuzzy and I was losing focus._

" _Take care uncle; we are all eager to see you again."_

_Morphia began to fade._

" _No wait!" I wailed._

_But it was too late. I tried to stay in control of my dream, but as usual I was lost into the chaos and oddness of my mind. The rest of my dreams there was no fire and darkness._

_There was only the memory of a soft bed, a pair of strong warm arms around me, and the sound of a soft voice humming ancient lullaby to me._

_It was a dream I had lived, a dream that sadly, came to an end._

* * *

 

Joham P.O.V

Morphia yawned and opened her eyes.

"Well?" I asked.

Her face broke out in a beautiful smile. "They have him grandfather," she said.

"Excellent," I smiled.

"I wore the new red dress daddy got for me. Do you think uncle liked it?" she asked.

I patted her affectionately on the cheek. "You look a vision child. Now go inform our family of Matthew's triumphant return."

"Yes grandfather."

She got up and left the room. I smiled to myself. Matthew was alive and would soon be mine again. With him under my control my family will be made stronger then ever.

No one will stop us, not with Matthew. Soon the Volturi will join the ranks of the things that were and the world of vampires will bow to my law. Centuries of work and patience will pay off.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

I opened my eyes.

There was the sound of a monitor beeping could be heard. For a moment I wondered why I was in a hospital and not home in bed when I remembered everything.

The monitor began to pick up speed and I sat up. My left side erupted in agony and I screamed.

"Leah!" hands grabbed me and pushed my down. I smelled vampire and familiar scents. Wolf scents. The scents of my brothers.

I opened my eyes and saw Carlisle, Fred, Jake, Seth, and Sam.

"Seth?"

He looked older. My baby brother had grown up a lot. All signs of childhood were quickly disappearing. His body was starting to develop into the body fit for manhood. He was looking more and more like dad did when he was young.

"It's me Leah, I am here." he gently ran his hand over my head. A lone tear ran down his face.

"God, you've grown."

He laughed.

"You gave us a scare Leah. Guess vampires aren't the only ones weak against fire," Jake said with a small smile.

I looked at my left side. It was redder then a tomato. It still felt like it was on fire, it made me remember when Matthew bit me that time an-

"Matthew!"

I tried to get up but the pain and the guys hands held me firmly in place. "Easy Leah, you are still healing," Carlisle said gently. "Had you been human you would be dead, but thanks to your species regenerative abilities you will pull through."

"How long have I been out?" I asked.

"Two days," Fred said.

"Two days! Tell me you have found Matthew!"

I knew from their solemn faces they had not.

"What happened, while I was out?" I asked.

Fred spoke. "Well I drove us straight here. Carlisle was already waiting. You were burned bad Leah, your skin had turned black."

"Your healing faster than a human would, you won't even scar, but you still need time to heal, I have been feeding you morphine to help you fight the pain."

"Fat lot of help, I feel like venom is running down my side," I said.

"Who did this to you?" Jake asked.

"Seraphina!" I growled.

"Isn't that Matthew's sister?" Seth asked.

"I thought she was dead," Sam said.

"Well she's not. She did this to me. They showed up wanting Matthew, I told them no. One of his sisters made him fall asleep and I phased and that bitch hit me with a jet of fire and burned my fucking house down!"

"I am sorry Leah, I smelled their scents but I had to help you first," Fred said.

"What about the house?" I asked hoping it was alright.

"Burned to the ground. I called Lance and told him you were in the hospital. He wants to know what happened."

"Don't call him back; we need to worry about Matthew."

I tried to get up again but they wouldn't let me.

"Leah you need to calm down," Jacob said firmly.

"Calm down? Matthew is gone, kidnapped. Would you be fucking calm if it was Nessie," I growled at him.

"Maybe it's for the best," Sam said.

"What!"

I had not really felt anything when I realized Sam was in here to. I was more concerned about Matthew but now he had my full attention and not in a good way.

"Leah, now he is with his family and now you are home. Maybe we should just let him stay with his sisters."

"You moron!" I hissed. "His daddy is alive too!"

"What!" they all said.

"Yeah, those bitches said so."

"But the Volturi hunted him down," Carlisle said.

"Maybe one of his brats can keep him hidden, I don't know and I don't care I need to find him."

"Leah we are doing everything we can. We already sent some wolves and a few of the Cullen's have gone to your house to see if they can catch a scent," Jake said.

"But Matthew-"

"Needs you at your best," Seth said. "You are no good to him half baked."

A tear fell down my eye. "Damn it."

"How did they even find you?"

I was starting to feel tired. Everything was getting blurry.

"They said Morphia found him; I guess she can move through dreams. They said she is Hypnia's daughter."

"Another hybrid?"

"I guess, I asked who the daddy is but they said there was more than one."

"Sleep Leah we will talk more later. When you are rested," Carlisle said.

"But-"

"Leah please," Fred said. "We will find him, I promise. We will not stop until we have out boy back."

His face was so beautiful and sincere; I could not help but feel trust.

"Clearwater," I whispered. My eyes began to blur.

"What?"

"Matthew...he wanted to be called Matthew Clearwater."

The darkness over took me and I could remember the feel of his arms around me and his love covering me like a blanket. Hold on baby, mommy is coming.

* * *

Understanding: A mental grasp, the power of comprehending, the power to make experiences intelligible.

Example: Matthew comes to an understanding with his family.

Matthew P.O.V

I opened my eyes and found myself in a strange room.

It was big and sun light was shining through the window. I sat up and looked around.

"You are up."

I looked to the side and saw Rosemary sitting on a chair. She was knitting and smiled when she saw me.

"Good, everyone has been waiting."

"Rosemary?" I asked.

"Who else?"

"Where are we?" I asked.

"We are home Matthew. You have been sleeping for two days."

"Two days!" I jumped up. "What happened? Where is Leah?" I demanded.

"Calm yourself Matthew, everything is fine," she said.

She took my hand in hers and led me into another room. It was a very big bathroom. "Wash yourself and get dressed, the family is waiting."

She left me alone in the bathroom. I looked around and found some cloth's neatly folded next to a big bath tub. I sniffed them and smelled an unfamiliar scent. It was female but smelled less human then Rosemary.

I took a quick bath. I was lonely. I wished Leah was here. Bath time just wasn't fun without her.

I quickly got dressed after I bathed and walked back out. She was still waiting for me. "Alright then, let's go."

She took my hand and led me out of the room. The halls were made of stone. There were paintings on the wall. Some were beautiful; others were so old you could hardly see what the pictures had been.

To my immense surprise I smelled human scents in the halls.

"Are we in Hogwarts?" I asked.

"What?" Rosemary asked.

"Are we going to meet Harry Potter?"

She laughed. "Sweet boy of course not. But we are in a castle, a very old castle. Father has some friends he has been working with a few years now. The castle was renovated a few years ago."

"Why do I smell humans?" I asked.

The smell of humans was making my throat burn with thirst.

"Well we need servants, and a meal," she laughed.

A girl turned around a corner. When she saw us she stopped and bowed as we passed. She said something in a language I did not understand. Rosemary did not respond, she acted as if the girl was not even there.

The girl's aura was filled with awe, fear, respect. She must know what Rosemary is. You don't have this much fear and awe of someone, not unless there is a darn good reason.

All kinds of scents filled the hallways. Many female, many male. Some human, some...not human. I could hear the sound of children playing and laughing. I could hear the sound of fast beating hearts.

"Rosemary, where is daddy?" I asked.

"In his study, he is meeting with our benefactors."

"Benefactors?"

"The ones who gave us this castle and gave us our children."

"Children?"

We stopped at a large wooden door. I knew they were out there. I could hear them, smell them, taste their delight and excitement in my mind. They were excited, they knew I was coming.

"Yes Matthew, our family has grown much since last you were with us."

She opened the door. Light spilled out and I stared. There were so many of them. We were in a vast garden. Flowers of red, blue and violet were grounded here and there. They were beautiful but not as beautiful as the sight I saw.

I saw my sisters. Seraphina, Mia, Sarah, Hypnia. Around them were boys and girls of all sizes and ages.

Some had dark hair, some had blonde. There were many shades of blond. I saw Morphia. She had gotten taller since I last saw her. There were many children though. Dozens of them. They didn't sparkle like vampires. But they looked like someone had sprinkled flecks of glitter on their skin. It was far from noticeable from the sparkleness of a vampire, but it would be much easier for them to be amongst humans.

They were all beautiful. I could see a lot of their mothers in them. One thing they all had in common was the shades of tan skin. Some had very light tan skin others were a bit darker, but all their skin was lighter than their mothers. Like their fathers might have been pale.

They all looked at me with amazement and awe. My sisters smiled pleased by the scene unfolding. I felt nervous. They were all looking at me, judging me, weighing me down.

Rosemary took my hand and gently tugged me forward. I followed her, gripping her hand tight like I did when I was young. I and Rosemary had always been close; she was both sister and nanny to me. Before I had Leah, Rosemary filled the void mommy left.

We stopped ten feet from my family. "This is your Uncle Matthew. He has come home," she said.

They had been silent, but filled with excitement. The second she finished speaking it was like a damn broke. They all surged forward and I got nervous. So many of them descended on me, not to attack. Not exactly.

They all began to hug me; some kissed me on the cheeks. Even the boys. I have never been kissed by a boy. Didn't like it. They all spoke excitedly. How happy they were to meet me, how much like daddy I looked. They all kept touching me, poking me, inspecting me. Like I was the most amazing thing.

I knew how happy they were, I could sense it. They truly were happy to have me and I felt more at home now with them, they accepted me so easily and readily it made me smile.

My family was not dead, they were alive and growing. I had lost sisters but now I had so many nephews and nieces it was ridiculous.

Morphia came up to me and kissed my cheek. "Welcome home Uncle Matthew," she said.

I looked at Rosemary. "They are yours?" I asked.

She chuckled. "Some. Not all of course."

"But there are so many? Why are some of them older than me?" It had only been little over three year since I saw them.

"I told you uncle, we are a purer strain of hybrids, we grow much quicker then hybrids like you," Morphia said.

Many of them had that special glow that some like Ness-Ness or Al-Al, or Ed-Ed had and I knew they were gifted. Some did not, but a lot did.

"Many of them are gifted."

A wave of surprise washed over the group. "How did you know?" A girl with dirty blonde hair and light blue eyes asked.

"You glow," was all I said.

A wave of ohhh's washed over them; I could sense how impressed they were.

"My name is Brand," the girl said. "Seraphina is my mother." Brand looked like she was seventeen or eighteen, she was fully mature. She had her mother's curls.

"What can you do?" I asked.

"I can super heat my skin, to the point where it can even burn vampire skin. It's not as powerful as mother's gift but useful in hand to hand combat." a tinge of bitterness flashed across her aura. She resented not being able to make fire like her mother. Personally I was glad. One fire wielder in the family was enough.

I smiled at her. "Super hot skin is cool," I said honestly.

She smiled and hugged me.

We stayed outside for a while. I got to knew my new family members. We played for a while. Tag, hide and seek, we sat in a circle and sang as some of the group danced. Our music was soft, graceful and elegant. My sisters watched us with happy eyes, pleased things were going smoothly.

I was so lost in the moment I almost forgot Leah. I excused myself from the group and went to go talk to my sisters. I needed to know what happened to Leah.

"What is wrong Matthew?" Mia asked.

Mia had short cut dark hair and very tan skin. She was the best tracker in the family. Her sense of smell was stronger than a full blood vampires. She could smell emotions and track anything by scent alone. She had some of the darker skin and her hair was black.

"I want to see daddy."

"Don't you want to visit with your nephews and nieces some more?" Sarah asked.

"Later, I need to see daddy."

"Father is still meeting with-"

"I don't care, I need to see him now," I said firmly. I wove obedience and willingness to listen into their auras.

Rosemary got up. "Very well." she took my hand and I promised everyone I would come back. They were disappointed they didn't get to play with me more.

Rosemary took me to a door on the opposite end of the garden. She led me me through the hallways and we passed a few humans. Like the girl they stopped and bowed and spoke in another language and Rosemary ignored them all.

I heard talking as we approached a large wooden door. There were two vampires I did not know on either side. I could smell daddy's scent leading into the room, I could hear his voice beyond.

"With Matthew it will be so easy," I heard him say.

"Must we wait? We should attack now?" another male voice said, his voice had a bit of an accent.

"We must wait, Matthew must adapt to this life. I am sure he is quit upset now. In fact I believe he is waiting outside the door."

Rosemary knocked on the door. "Enter."

I was more nervous now, more so then I had been when I met my new kin. I had so many questions for daddy, but at the same time I wanted to run into his arms like I did when I was little, I wanted him to toss me up in the air and catch me like he did when I was so much smaller.

Rosemary opened the door. We walked into a larger room. Metal chandeliers hung from the ceiling, candles were lit on top of them that cast light into the room. There were a few more vampires in the room; they stood against the wall like guards.

There was a big round table in the center. Three sat there, two vampires with oddly white and thin looking skin and...Daddy.

He stood facing me, a smile on his face. His aura had happiness and delight with a mix of pride. He was happy to see me. Very happy.

"Hello Matthew," he said.

With those two words the dam that had been holding back all my emotions broke. For so long I thought he was dead, I thought I would never see him again. I went running right for him. I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him.

He chuckled and wrapped his arms around me tight. My eyes became blurry with tears. "You have grown so much," he said.

"Daddy, I thought you were dead. I tried to find you but I forgot about you and everyone," I cried.

"Shhh, its okay my son. You are home now, it is okay."

I pulled back to look at him. "Daddy where did you go? Why did you leave me?" I asked.

"I didn't mean to Matthew, believe me. But after I escaped, I and your sisters tried to find you and Rosemary. We found her but she was crazy with fear, a result of you projecting your power in self defense when Jane attacked you. We tried to find you but we feared the Volturi got to you. By the time we managed to get Rosemary calmed down it had been months since we lost you. We have been hiding from the Volturi ever since."

"How did you escape? Carl-Carl said they are hard to hide from."

"I faked my death. I had Seraphina burn our home down, we made the Volturi think I was inside and they thought me vanquished. A dear mistake on their part. But what of you? Where ever did you go?"

"Well me woke up and me had no memory of who I was. All I knew was I was special, I was being Matthew and me had daddy me had to find. All I remembered was terrible burning pain." I shuddered. "Me wonder jungle for long time, fighting animals who try to eat Matthew and eating humans when I was getting thirsty. Me met vampires here and there, they smell like you some hope they know you or be you but they not you and they are mean and want to hurt Matthew but I make them go away. Then one day when me is trying to find you he finds Charlie the policeman and he meets me with Carl-Carl and he takes me home to me his family and they help me and teach me to drink animal blood because it is bad to drink human blood because they are people and they have neighbors they make deal with and I met them they are Indians called Quileute's and they turn into wolves and some of them are real mean but Jake-Jake, Quil-Quil Bry-Bry, and Seth-Seth are nice. And Leah to, Leah is so cool and amazing and beautiful, she is the only girl and she was real sad, bitter and lonely but she met Matthew and we be happy but then Matthew get real thirsty and attack a girl who was Leah's cousin but also imprint of wolf Called Sam and Sam got mad and tried to kills me but Leah fight for Matthew and we hide from everyone in a place called Priddis and we met Fred-Fred who was all alone and sad but we met him and he became happy and we lived together for a long time. Fred-Fred taught me how to play cards and taught me stuff like Math even though I don't like math and Leah...I miss her a lot daddy, can I go back and see Leah? I love her a lots and if she is hurt me will very mad and I will hurt someone real bad if Leah is hurt."

My little fists trembled with rage.

"Come now Leah, surely you wouldn't hurt one of your own sisters over some girl," daddy said.

"Leah is not some girl!" I yelled. "Leah loves me, she cloth me, she feed me, she protect me, she left her home and family and it hurt her a lot but she do it to protect Matthew. We would watch TV together and play games and hunt animals and laugh about stuff and she would sing me to sleep when I was having bad dreams and she was trying to keep Seraphina from taking me still trying to protect me!"

Daddy did not look happy at my little outburst but I was not caring. I had to know if Leah was okay. Rosemary stepped forward. "Father, the girl, this Leah. There could be another reason why he is so attached to her."

"Show me," he said.

She walked up to him and placed her hand on his face. Rosemary was like Nessie, she could show people her memories. I know she was showing daddy the memory she had of Leah. Surprise and shock filled his aura. Just like it had my sisters when they saw Leah.

"Well, that is unnerving," he said.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Nothing important. I am sure Leah is fine. Seraphina didn't actually kill her. She was in the house when it burned down but I am sure she got out in time."

"Seraphina burned the house down!"

The idea of our lovely home burning to the ground hurt me a lot. The idea of Leah burning inside that house hurt even more. What about Fred-Fred? Had he gotten home in time to save her? What if Leah died in the fire. Fred-Fred would be alone again.

"Why did she burn the house down, that was not nice!" I growled.

"She would not let you come back with us."

"Leah could have come with us, her and Fred-Fred!"

Daddy placed his hands on my shoulders. "Now calm down Matthew. You are returned to us after three long years, we have all worked very hard to find you. Be joyful, you are back with us."

"But Leah-"

"Is fine, I am sure. Shape-shifters do not die easy."

He hugged me again and I felt the happiness and gratitude in his aura. "I am just happy you are safe and sound, all these years I feared I had lost you. I have lost enough children already."

"I missed you daddy," I said hugging him, unable to feel mad at him when he was glowing with love and happiness.

Someone cleared their throat. I pulled back and saw that the two odd looking vampires were standing now. "Shouldn't you introduce us Joham?" the one with ash blonde hair asked.

"Ah yes, where are my manners. Matthew, I would like for you to meet your...brothers-in-law. Stefan and Vladimir. Last of the Romanian coven and my partners in my planes."

"Greetings child, welcome to Romania," the other vampire said with dark hair said.

"Romania?" I asked.

"Yes, this is castle Poenari in Arges country. Poenari was one of our many castles we had when we ruled. For many years it was uninhabited until Stefan and myself moved back in a few years ago. We have allowed your kin to live here with us," said the one with the very pale colored hair who was Vladimir.

"You are the daddies of my sisters' children?"

"That we are. Years ago after we met the Cullens we came to South America to find your father, we knew the Volturi would be seeking him out soon," the black haired one Stefan said.

"That was how you came up with the plane for me to go into hiding with Rosemary," I said to daddy.

"Yes. Had our friends not warned us we would have been wiped out, we owe them much," daddy said.

"After that he came to find us in Romania, along with your sisters. We returned to this castle. The locals believe it to be haunted and never come near it so we need not worry about privacy. We returned and made some renovations."

I looked at the vampire guards. "And who are they?" I asked.

"The people of this land remember us; remember us in our finest hour. We knew we would need help in our plane so we began recruiting from the locals. They help serve and protect us as their ancestors did in the days of old."

"Huh?"

"See little one back when we ruled the people knew we were vampires. We did not try and hide like the Volturi do. The people feared us, but they also served us. They knew if they pleased us enough then they might be well rewarded," Vladimir said.

"Do they get their freak on with my sisters to?"

"What?"

"You know," I gyrated my hips, just like Em-Em did that one time.

The Romanians looked at me like I was doing something very bizarre. They glanced at one another and shrugged.

"No, that right is reserved for Stefan and Vladimir only, as per our deal," Daddy said grinning, amused by my antics.

"What deal?"

"In return for providing sanctuary to your family Joham has promised to help restore our coven to its former glory," Stefan said.

"Why don't you just make your own coven?"

"Because this new coven of ours will be better than the last. Hybrids are much more useful in blending in with the human world and are easier to train then newborns. The amount of time it takes to train hybrids compared to newborns is considerably lower. Plus by breeding hybrids we insure we have warriors with gifts when using a human there is no way to tell if they are gifted."

"So you are breeding an army? For what purpose?"

"Not an army Matthew, a coven, a family, a new race. The Romanians do not wish to remain hidden like the Volturi do. They make a new race that will slowly replace humans and vampires," daddy said.

"Once there are enough hybrids in the world we will reveal ourselves to the world and by then we will have assimilated ourselves into the human world so much that the great revelation will be a simple, painless thing," Stefan said.

"But what about the Volturi people? They will try and hurt us again," I said.

"Don't worry about them, we are already planning to deal with them," daddy said.

"But how?"

"You will soon see." he kissed me on the head and hugged me one more time. "I am glad you are home Matthew. Now go play with the others, they have been eagerly waiting for you. We will talk more."

"Okay."

I took Rosemary's hand and we left daddy and the Romanians behind to talk. I still had so many questions; I still wanted to know if Leah was okay. But at the same time a part of me wanted to stay and be with my family.

One side wanted to go, one side wanted to stay. How much long before one beat out the other.

_I will come back to you Leah, I promise._

* * *

 

Joham P.O.V

I waited until my children's heart beats faded.

"Well that was interesting," Vladimir said.

"Too bad the witch worked her fire magic on him. Kind of hinders our plans," Stefan said.

"Worry not, Matthew's condition won't change anything. With him on our side victory is a sure thing. He will make our coven strong enough to take the Volturi down and help us keep control of the other vampires. His ability is a unique mix of Marcus, Chelsea and Eleazar's powers. We will be able to find vampires with gifts and bind them to us and form a coven much larger than the Volturi."

"Is he really that strong?" Stefan asked.

"Yes. Thanks to his mother's blood. He is everything I have worked to achieve. A being with a gift powerful enough to bring my planes to fruition."

"What about the she-wolf?" Vladimir asked. "If she has survived she may try to find him."

"Even if she does she has no way to find us, even with the help of these Cullens."

"Do not underestimate them. They are the first coven ever to escape the full force of the Volturi. What if they learn what we plane to do and warn Aro? All our planes will go up in flame."

"There is no way they could figure out what we are up to, you worry too much. With all the hybrids we have here, we are protected from the seer's visions and they have no way to track him."

"But what if he decides to contact them? You saw how passionate he spoke of them," Stefan said.

"Well, if Matthew starts missing them to much I think we make him forget them very easily," I said.

"You would wipe your son's memory?"

"Don't sound so shocked. I have had to do it before. He always asked to many questions, always had to question what I told him. That was why I chose Rosemary to be his caretaker. The second he started showing too much doubt or independence she would modify his memory."

"So what if he decides not to help us in the plane? It seems the Cullen's have left a mark on him," Vladimir said.

"It matters not, whether he wishes to or not does not matter. In the end he will help us. Now I think that is enough for today, let us go join the children. It is such a nice day."

We left the room and headed for the garden. My thoughts turned to the memory Rosemary had shown me of this Leah. I was unnerved by her, I hope she is dead. The physical resemblance is to uncanny for even my liking.

As for the Cullens, I am not worried. They will not be able to locate us at all, a few more weeks and the world will change. And no one can stop me.

 

**Fusedtwilight: The castle I mention in this chapter is an actual castle in Romania. Look it up. Next chapter Matthew begins to learn his family isn't all it's cracked up to be and Leah has a reunion with her former pack. Please review.**

 


	21. Chapter 21

Focused Madness

Chapter 21

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to mybetagirlkiki for betaing, This chapter Leah has an important talk with Sam and Matthew begins to doubt his family.**

Frustration: A deep chronic sense or state of insecurity and dissatisfaction arising from unresolved problems or unfulfilled needs.

Example: The frustration between Leah and the wolves is released.

Leah P.O.V

I spent three days recovering. Three long, painful, bastard days.

I had been in and out of a lot of it. Seth was always there. Mom came to visit me, I wish we were meeting under better circumstances, but she helped ease away some of the dark clouds that littered my mind. We did a lot of catching up. Seth would be graduating this year. He had been working hard to mix his duties as a wolf and his duties as a student. I was really proud of Seth.

I told them all about Priddis, about my job, about the nice little house. Mom approved of the stuff I got to make the place homey.

Jake had been keeping me up to date about the Matthew situation. There were no new leads. Alice had remembered no new visions, and they been unable to find any scents from the house. By the time they had arrived any trail we had, had run cold.

Seth and mom were driving me home. My left side only felt like I had a painful sun burn. A day or two and it will be back to normal. Had I still been human I would be horribly scared for life.

I needed to get out of the Cullens. I was going stir crazy and I needed to find a way to release myself of a lot of pent up energy. Mom was talking about how she and Charlie were still going. I barely listened though. I was too busy thinking about Fred.

I had not seen him since I first woke up. I was a little miffed he hadn't come to visit me.

I watched the scenery as we drove. Everything seemed the same. Two years and not much had changed. The houses were still where they were, the school was still where it was, the Atera grocery store still run by the Atera family was still there.

Nothing changes much in La Push. But yet everything seemed surreal now. Like I was a stranger who somehow knew where everything was. Had Matthew been with me he would inquire as to my mood. I have no idea what the color I am feeling is. Probably gray or some shit.

I keep on thinking about Matthew. Was he safe? Was he happy? Were they being nice to him? Were they feeding him right? Were they keeping him in a nice room? Were they being mean to him?

I was happy to see mom and Seth, but thoughts of Matthew dominated my mind. I wanted to be out there looking for him. But I have no idea where to look. One thing I was dreading was Nahuel. The Cullens had gone to inform him of the situation and I so do not want to see him. The thought of seeing him look at me with anger for failing to protect Matthew...

Soon we pulled up to the house. It was the same, except mom and added some new flower pots on the porch.

I got out of the car, and froze. There were two cars in the driveway. One I recognized belonging to the Blacks. The other was Sam and Emily's.

"Mom?" I asked.

I could smell their scents in the air now that I was out of the car. I was wondering why everyone were here?

"Your friends have come to see you Leah. Everyone was so worried about you," she said.

"You knew and you didn't tell me?" I demanded. A streak of anger ran through me.

"I wanted you to have a nice surprise. We have all missed you so much."

"Mom look at me," I pointed at my still burned left side, "I can't let them see me like this."

"You'll be fine, they have seen worse," She said.

Seth put his hand on my right shoulder. "Don't worry Leah, they just want to see how you have been."

I sighed and followed mom and Seth to the house. I had hoped to one day bring Matthew here. He had told me numerous times he wanted to see my house.

I could hear everyone inside talking. Mom opened the door and we walked inside. The chatter died down and everyone looked at us. They were all here. All the members of the original pack. Sam, Jared, Paul, Embry, Quil, Collin, Brady and Jake (who I shot a glare) and even the imprints.

"Leah!" Emily came running forward, her face set in a delighted smile.

"Hey Em," I said.

"Oh, how are you feeling? Are you okay?" she was looking at my left side with such sadness. She wasn't the only one. Everyone was looking at my burns with a look of pain or anger. Or in Sam's case a little bit of both.

"Been better. It's nice to see you again, you look great," I said.

She smiled. Soon everyone was welcoming me back. Mom got some food ready for us all. They were all asking me questions. Where was I? How did I get by? All of them except Sam, who remained quiet and brooding.

They asked me what it was like to live with a vampire. They asked how I could stomach the smell, I told them it was hard at first but after a while when you get past the burning you can smell their true scents better.

"Man Leah you got some balls," Paul said.

"Yeah Leah, all by yourself while looking after a hybrid?" Collin said looking amazed.

"Well Fred helped a lot," I said.

"That's my sister," Seth said proudly.

It was so odd. I was not used to being the center of attention. I was not used to being idolized and so welcomed by everyone. I figured mom and Seth and Emily and Jake were a sure thing but everyone else?

I got up to speed on how everyone was doing. How everything had been quiet since I left, how they had no vampires show up. No one has imprinted. Jake had been the last wolf to imprint and no one else had yet.

An hour later and I was feeling a bit better. Everyone was doing an amazing job making me feel at home. I am sure if Matthew was here he would love the atmosphere right now. He would tell me all the colors he was seeing.

I showed them all my burns. They all winced when they saw it. We always wondered how our healing powers would fair against fire, but there was only one way to find out. But now we knew.

"Man that leech really let you have it Leah," Quil said.

"Half leech and when I find the bitch I intend to pay her back with interest," I said with a dark scowl.

Everyone seemed to share a look. I had no idea how to decipher it but I know they were thinking of something that made them a bit nervous.

"Leah, good news. The elders want you back. Now that everything has been settled you can stay," Kim said with a smile.

"Well I can't stay long, as soon as I am healed I am gone," I said.

"What why?" mom asked looking distressed.

"To find Matthew of course."

An awkward silence filled the room. The once warm and friendly atmosphere evaporated. It was so quit you could hear the clock on the wall ticking.

"Leah, I know you got close with the boy. But don't you think you should just let him go?" Rachel said.

I glared at her and she flinched. Paul put a protective arm around her.

"I mean. He is with his family now and you don't have to look after him. You can come back home an-"

"And do what?" I asked harshly.

"Return to your old life of course."

"Old life? You mean the one where I had nothing better to do then run around on all floors hunting monsters until I croak?"

"Leah, she was just making a point," Mom said lightly.

"Oh yeah, well what's the point?" I asked her.

"You left us to protect him, but now he is with his own kind. That is for the best. He is where he belongs and you are where you belong, here with us."

"No, that is not true. Matthew does not belong with those freaks; he belongs with his real family. Me and Fred."

"Oh come on Leah. Do you really think playing little house on the prairie with a hybrid and a vampire is any better than the life you had here?" Paul asked.

"Fuck you Paul! It was my life! Mine! I had no one telling me what to do and I didn't have to give up any dreams or aspirations because I was unlucky enough to be born with the wrong fucking D.N.A."

"Yeah some life, it almost got you killed," he sneered.

"At least I had a nice normal job to support myself. Tell me you find a job yet or are you still leeching of the Black's?"

"Come on Leah that is uncalled for," Rachel said defending Paul.

"I'll take that as a yes."

Paul bared his teeth at me. "You have a lot of nerve, you are lucky we even allowed you back after the shit you pulled."

"Oh yeah and what shit is that?"

"Well let's see, first you almost killed Sam, then you fucking left the pack and the tribe for a freak."

I was wishing Fred or Matthew was here right now, they could calm me down. Paul was pissing me off and I was about to take it out on everyone. All the rage I had been holding since Matthew was stolen from me was finding a way out. One thing I was good at for relieving myself of anger was being a real bitch.

"Well if Sam wasn't trying to kill him I wouldn't have had to fight him!"

"Well if he hadn't tried to kill Emily Sam wouldn't have tried to kill him! Seriously Leah, you chose a monster over your own blood, you probably hoped he would kill her so you could have Sam back!"

Jake, Quil, Embry and Seth growled at Paul, Mom wasn't a wolf but she was doing a good impression of one.

"Paul that is enough!"

A bunch of shocked eyes turned to Emily. She had yelled at Paul, Emily never yells at anyone.

"Leah almost died, don't you get that? All these years and you can't be nice to her? After everything you have been through your going to accuse her of something so horrible? You should be ashamed Paul," she said.

Paul looked away, his face angry but regretful. That look people get when they have been chastised for being dumb and they know it.

"Thanks Em," I said.

Sam placed his hand on Emily's. A single tear ran down her face. "I am sorry Leah. It's my fault. Sam didn't want me to go to that game. Kim and Rachel didn't want to go either but I talked them into it."

I stared at her shocked. "Why? Why did you go?"

I knew she had talked Sam into letting her go, but I didn't know she had convinced Kim and Rachel to go.

"Because I wanted to hang out with you. I wanted to have fun with you like we did when we were kids. I saw the change he was bringing on you. I saw how happy you were becoming, you were turning back into the old Leah I knew, I wanted to see you laugh and smile again. I wanted things to be like they were before. I thought, it would be fun, like old times."

I said nothing. I knew she had talked Sam into letting her go. I never pondered why she did it; I never knew she dragged Kim and Rachel to it. All so she could be close again with me.

I got up and everyone was tense. Like they expected me to freak the fuck out. Which was what I normally did. But for the first time I did something I never did before. I walked away.

"I need to go for a walk."

I headed for the door. Mom and Seth followed me. "Leah don't leave," mom begged.

"I'll be right back, I just need some alone time."

"Leah."

"Mom, please. I am pissed, frustrated, scared and if I don't leave now I am going to make a huge scene in front of everyone and I don't want to do that, I just need some time alone. Please."

She sighed, and then nodded. "Okay. But don't be too late; I am making your favorite steak for dinner."

I kissed her on the cheek and hugged her. "Thanks mom."

She hugged me back; I could feel the tension leaving her body. I gave Seth a quick kiss and hug and walked out the door. By the time I hit the tree line I heard Jake following me. I knew it was him from his smell.

"What do you want Black?" I snapped.

He walked up beside me, a goofy grin on his face. "Decided to take a walk too. A lot of tension in that place."

"Gee, ya think?" I asked rolling my eyes.

"Mind if I join you?"

"Yes as a matter of fact I do. I am feeling really anti-social right now and want to be alone."

"Well too bad."

"Will you just go away?" I snapped.

He shook his head. "Sorry but you're a rough wolf in my territory. I got to make sure you don't cause any mischief."

"Dick," I muttered.

He chuckled. "How ar-"

"I swear to God if you ask me if I am okay or fine then I will bite you on the ass!"

"Wouldn't be the first time."

"What?"

"So, is it weird being back?" he asked, quickly changing the subject.

"Very. Nothing has really changed. In the movies someone leaves home and comes back and everything is different. But the only thing that feels different is me. Like I am a stranger you know?"

He nodded.

"I mean, everyone expects me to just go back to how everything was. Like I am just supposed forget about him and everything, like everything that we went through never happened. That for two wonderful years I felt more at peace and normal than I ever have."

He sighed. "It's not looking good Leah. We have no way to track these people down. Maybe you should consider the possibility that you won't be able to find him."

I shook my head. "No, I can't accept that. I won't. Not now, not ever. If I have to spend an eternity, if I have to keep phasing, if I have to wonder the earth all by myself I will. I will never, stop trying to find him Jake. And if no one will help me, fine, I will look by myself."

"You've changed Leah. There is a fire in your eyes now I didn't see before. He really did change you for the better," Jake said with a proud smile.

"He did some changing too. He was starting to speak right and all."

"Leah."

We turned around. Sam had followed us.

"We need to talk," he said.

"Sam, I don't think that is a good idea," Jake said.

"Please, we need to talk," he said.

"It's okay Jake. I will be fine," I said.

Jake looked at me and I nodded. "Okay, I will be close by."

He walked off. Leaving me alone with Sam.

He walked up to me slowly, careful. I watched him wearily, waiting for him to do or say something to piss me off. I waited for the old feelings to surface. The bitterness, the longing, the things that once overwhelmed me. Only now I barely felt anything.

Maybe a bit of nostalgia for the old days when the world was simple and uncomplicated. But compared to before when the pain was unbearable I could not call it pain anymore, more like a a strong ach.

"Hello Leah," he said.

"Hey Sam," I greeted back politely. No sarcasm or wit.

"I am glad you are back."

"Glad someone is."

"Don't let Paul get to you. He still needs to work on his anger issues."

"Something tells me he isn't the only one who thinks I am a traitor."

"You are not a traitor Leah," he said firmly, "some of the wolves just have a hard time with you running off to live with vampires."

"I didn't want to leave...no...I did want to leave. But not like that. Not with the memory of you...but sometimes shit happens. Story of my life. Why didn't you tell me about Emily? Why didn't you tell me she was feeling like that?"

He shrugged. "Because every time I brought up you and her hanging out again you clammed up. And you were already gone and made it clear you weren't coming back."

He had a point there. I always did my best to avoid them.

"Was he changing me so much it could be seen?" I asked. I tried to think back then. Was the connection between me and Matthew strong even then?

"Emily seemed to think so, she was always better at seeing you better than most."

"Yeah, even when we were kids she could do that."

"Leah, maybe you should consider what Rachel said," Sam said.

"Don't you start too," I warned.

"Leah please, see sense. He is with his family now; it's time you came back to yours."

"No."

"What life could you have with him Leah, are you going to stay immortal for him? Are you going to make him watch as you grow old and die?"

"He'll have Fred and Nahuel."

"How many times have you almost lost your life Leah? First he bit you, then he attacked Emily, he almost made you kill me, you almost died protecting him. What more do you need to see sense, it was not meant to be."'

"Why are you so obsessed with me coming back and leaving him Sam?"

"Because I care about you Leah. I know I hurt you but I just want you to be safe and happy."

"That's the thing Sam, that's what you don't get I was happy!" I yelled at him. "I was moving on, I had a normal life. A job, a house, and a ki-...everything I once dreamed of having."

"Leah, you have to let go. You can't use a hybrid to fill your need for a child, it's not healthy."

Sam had caught what I was going to say. I was going to say a house and kid. But I knew if I said it he would try and use my infertility against me. But he knew what I was going to say.

"This wasn't about me Sam. You know what your problem is? You keep on seeing him as a hybrid, as something inhuman, something that doesn't fit with a family. But you never saw him for what he is Sam. A child. A little boy who needs a family. A real family. Not that fucked up group his father bred. Well I got news for you and I want you to pay real close attention so all those assholes in your pack can see this when they are linked with you. That boy is mine, you got that? He is mine to protect because as far as I am concerned he is my son."

"Le-"

"Sam for once in your life will you just shut the fuck up and let me finish!" I yelled at him. "He showed me his love for me Sam, before they showed up when were planning on coming back he showed me how much he loved me with his power. He told me he wanted to be called Matthew Clearwater, Sam. He wanted to show everyone that he had changed; he said he wanted to make me proud, he said he wanted to be a better person for me. I have to get him back Sam because if I don't they are going to wipe his memory and take out everything I love about him and everything that makes him good and fill it with their ideas and the Matthew I knew will be dead and...and..."

I began to cry. I hated to, especially in front of Sam. But all that fear and anger found a better way to come out.

Sam wrapped his arms around me and let me cry. That was the real reason I was so desperate to get him back. I knew at any moment they could take away all the memories we had made together. Take away all the love and happiness and fill it with their cold logic and instincts. He would forget me and Fred and the Cullens. He would forget all the times we watched TV or hunted in the woods or he fell asleep in my arms as I sang softly to him.

He would forget all the times Fred taught him to play cards, play ball, all the times they wrestled and played video games.

How could I bear to know at any moment he could be lost to me? That when next I saw him he would not even know who I was?

Sam held me tight as I cried. Just like he did when dad died. When I was finally able to return to human form I cried so damn hard and Sam had been there to hold me as I cried.

Sam let me go and I wiped my face. "I miss him so much Sam, I miss holding him in my arms, I miss running with him through the woods, I miss hearing his voice and his smell. And at any moment all that could be destroyed and no one understands, they keep on telling me to let him go, to forget, but I can't forget, I will never forget."

I took a step forward, looking him dead in the eye. I let Sam see the real me. I had many faces in my life, the daughter, the sister, the lover, the bitch, the beta. But now he was seeing the most dangerous and lethal. Leah the mother.

I let him see this new me, this me that was stronger than any face I have ever wore. I looked him right in the eye so when he was in wolf form and his mind was linked with the others, I wanted them to see this, this new me. So next time someone decides it is a smart thing to tell me to drop Matthew, they know to mind their own fucking business.

"I will never stop. I will find him and I will mow down anyone or anything that gets in my way. The second I am back to full strength I will be out there hunting down him and his sisters and his daddy. And I am going to kill every single one of them so they will never come for him again."

He looked at me with serious eyes. I could not tell if he liked the new Leah, I didn't care if he liked it or not. I had a mission in life. That was to find and protect Matthew.

To my surprise he backed away. Sam never backed away.

"I don't know if I should like the transformation he brought in you or not Leah. I see death in your eyes Leah."

"You don't have to like it Sam, if you won't help me then stay the fuck out of my way."

"I won't help you Leah. I am glad he is gone. But I won't stop you either. I will tell the others to not provoke you about it anymore."

"Thank you Sam. That's all I request," I said.

"So what now?"

"Now? Now I rest, get my strength back and start finding any trace I can of Matthew. I will try and spend as much time with mom and Seth as I can."

"And how will you find him?"

"The Cullens will help. I am sure Carlisle has a friend or someone who can help us find him."

"And if he doesn't want to come back?"

"He will," I said firmly.

"But what if they have already wiped his mind?"

"Then I will still bring him back."

"He won't go willingly."

"I figured he wouldn't."

"He might fight you."

"I know."

"Where will you go if you do find him?"

"Back here. You did promise Emily you wouldn't come after him right?"

He scowled. "Yes, I did. I meant it, as much as I think it should be done. But I won't go back against a promise I made to Emily."

"Good. Then when I get back I am going to move in with the Cullen's. They'll be leaving soon and we will move in there. I'll get a job and work on going to college and Fred will live with us and look after Matthew while I am gone, just like in Priddis. We'll be a family again."

"Family?"

"Yes Sam a family. And I will get Carlisle to help me get some papers so I can adopt him. Give him the last name he wants so bad."

"Leah, I hate to be a broken record. But you can't do this. What will you do when you fall in love? What will you do when you imprint?"

"Have him move in of course."

"And you're just going to let him be around vampires? Fred is still new to the Cullen lifestyle and Matthew has shown to be dangerous in the past."

"I'll work something out, I promised Matthew I would always be there for him and I won't let anything break that promise, not even the imprinting will."

"I don't think this is a good idea Leah, I think you should leave him with his family. There have been too many things to prove this."

"Well you are entitled to your opinion, but I am still going to bring him back home."

We said nothing for a few moments. "Well, some of the guys left already. Paul is sorry for being a jerk. I'll have him come back later to say sorry."

"Unless he really means it don't even bother. I am no mood for false apologies."

We headed back for the house. Jake walked with us, whether he heard us or not I didn't know. We did not talk as we walked back. When we did only Emily was still there, everyone else had decided the party was over.

We continued without them. We ate the food Mom made and carried on like there was no fight. After an hour Emily, Sam and Jake left. Emily gave me a gentle hug, Sam gave me a shake of the hand and Jake patted me on my good shoulder and promised me he would see me soon.

He smiled at me and there was pride in his eyes. I guess he did hear what I said to Sam and was proud of me for it.

I spent the rest of the day with mom and Seth. Seth and I took a nice walk through the woods for a while, talking about what he planned to do after school and what he wanted to do. He was at a cross roads. Things were tricky for him because of his protector status. Plus with the recession the country was finding itself in it was hard to pick a good paying job.

We got back home and found Charlie waiting. He didn't give me a big hug or anything but he had a big happy smile on his face when he saw me.

I didn't mind seeing him. I was glad to see him. It was odd. Since I have returned all the things that agitated me or pissed me off didn't affect me as much.

The anger I felt over the whole Sam imprinting on Emily was still there, but it didn't hurt as bad as it once did. Any resentment I felt for mom going off with Charlie was gone.

I felt like I had been living in a world of fog, made from anger and resentment that left me blind to the world. But now the fog was gone and the world seemed clearer than I remembered it to be.

I talked to Charlie for a while, he was doing good. Everything had been quit in Forks. A few drunken idiots and some high speed drivers were all he had to deal with. I was glad he had a peaceful quit life. I envied him that.

Soon it got dark out and Charlie left. Mom seemed happy that I was more comfortable around Charlie now. I was still a little at odds with it. But hey, if I can go and fuck a hybrid and have hot feelings for a vampire who was I to judge?

I had to wonder when I became so calm and rational. I was not known for being calm or rational. Was it something that happened slowly during the last two years? Or was it when Matthew opened his soul to me and showed his love for me? I wish I could give justice to that feeling, that all encompassing feeling that shattered every emotional wall I built to protect my heart. I missed him so much it hurt. I was so worried about him. I kept on thinking about him.

Was he happy? Safe? Loved? Protected? Fed? Healthy? So many questions and I don't have any answers, it was pissing me off!

Soon I was tired and I headed off for bed. I kissed mom on the cheek and gave Seth a hug. I walked up to my room. Nothing had changed. Mom had kept it nice and clean but all the pictures were where they had been and the sheets were the same and the blinds were the same.

Yet I was so much different then when I was last in here.

I laid down on the bed, careful because of my burns.

I turned on my right side, moved over to the left and instinctively reached out to hold on to Matthew. My heart sunk when I realized he was not there. For one wonderful moment I had forgotten he had been kidnapped and thought he was still with me. I moved over to the middle and I took my extra pillow and placed it in my arms. A poor substitute, but it gave me something to hold onto.

It took me a while, but eventually I was able to drift off to sleep. At least in my head, me and Matthew were still together.

* * *

Reservations: Doubts and misgivings.

Example: Matthew develops some reservations about his family.

A week after abduction

Matthew P.O.V

I watched as Vladimir slammed his son into the ground.

I winced.

It was not easy living with my nephews and nieces. They were nice to me and all. But they were very wild and temperamental. There were a lot of fights that happened at the castle.

Hormones and vampire mindsets do not mix real well. They could fight really viciously though, and sadly since they were more vampire then human their thirst was stronger and since daddy taught them no self control it was a little tough to keep hired help alive.

I remember when two male hybrids got into a fight. One of the maids came to see what the commotion was about. The second they smelled her they stopped fighting and fell on her like wolves much to my horror.

I have begun using my power to make everyone calm and rational. I have had a 100 percent success rate. Since I have used my powers no has fought. Daddy is really proud of me for doing that. My sisters are grateful because they hate seeing their babies fight.

Right now was training time. Daddy and Vladimir and Stefan were teaching everyone how to fight. This was no easy sparring though, despite the fact they faced their offspring Stefan and Vladimir showed no restraint with their children. Daddy showed no concern, but if one of my sisters felt they were getting too rough they would make their fathers give them a break.

Mikhail got up and hissed at Vladimir. Vladimir just grinned.

Mia got nervous and spoke. "Don't hurt him Vladimir," she said with a chastising tone.

Vladimir winked at her and she frowned. I was very curious as to Vladimir and Stefan's relationship with my sisters. Seraphina, Hypnia, Rosemary, Mia and Sarah all _shared_ them.

From what I have seen from their aura's there is dark pink which means lust and some small levels of affection, some held more for others. I noticed Stefan favored Seraphina more than the others while Vladimir seemed to enjoy Hypnia more.

Seraphina's feelings for them both were the same. Indifference. They meant nothing to her. A way to make babies and the means to an end, nothing more. The others had more feelings for them then she did, then again she only seemed to have affection for daddy and her children.

It was so different then what the Cullens had. The Cullens shared themselves or their mates with no one. They had nothing but love for one another. It made me uncomfortable to think my sisters were in some bizarre mating arrangement with these Romanians.

When Leah had _the talk_ with Matthew, she said sex should be done with someone you love. But there was no love with them. So why?

Also why must they train every day? We would spend hours outside training. And it could be so brutal and harsh. Daddy never let me train though, I was thankful. I did not want to hurt no one and there was a lot of hurt that could happen.

I was disturbed at how much the new hybrids enjoyed the fight. The laughed, they jeered, they teased. Even if someone lost a limb. They seemed eager for violence. I had to wonder if it was because of their extra vamp-y side or if it was because how daddy and the Romanians trained them to be.

Nessie was never like this. During these times we were less like a family and more like a bunch of soldiers being trained.

I was missing Leah and Fred-Fred a lot. I did my best to keep my missing them from seeping out. I didn't want the others to share my misery. I did my best to act like I wasn't missing Leah or Fred-Fred. But I thought about them a lot.

Daddy and no one had told me anymore about these plans daddy had for me. I had been tempted to use my power to make them talk but Leah said it is not nice to use my power on others against their will so I don't. I still want to be a good boy for Leah and I don't want her to find out I was using my power to do bad things.

I was never alone; Rosemary was always with me like she used to be. I was also always around the new hybrids. They always called me uncle or Uncle Matthew which was neat.

I was still only eating animals. Daddy and everyone tried hard to get me to go back to humans and although I was tempted I refused. Everyone thought I was mad to drink animal blood. Said it was unnatural. But I refused. I promised no more human blood and I meant it.

Things got real dicey one night. Daddy decided to treat us to something special. I was the only one to be horrified by it.

* * *

_Flashback_

_It was four days after I arrived in Romania._

_Everyone had a grueling day of training we were on our way back to the castle. We were told to get cleaned and dress nice. Daddy and the Romanians had a surprise for us._

_Rosemary and her three sons led me to the throne room. Her sons were Gregory, Steven and Peter. All three were gifted._

_Peter could trap you in a mental reality so real it could fool every sense. It was kind of like being in a dream world where he could control every aspect. If he wanted he could make the dream last for years, while in real world time seconds had passed. He could make it pleasant or extremely horrific._

_Gregory could make you remember. Everything you have ever forgotten he can make you remember it all. It was like he refreshes your mind, making all the old memories new again._

_Steven could make you relive your best most happiest memories, or your worst and most traumatic._

_All three had power that dealt with memory, just like their mother._

_Stefan was Steven and Peter's father, Vladimir was Gregory's._

_We were about thirty feet from the throne room when I stopped. I was sensing fear, lots and lots of fear. Fear is black with ruby red highlights. I smelled the scent of humans. But they were no humans I had smelled before._

_At first I thought daddy had brought in some new humans who knew what we were and were more scared then the others had been. But this fear was too strong, and I was sensing anticipation and hunger from the hybrids. The sound of human hearts beating fast and the sound of gagged whimpers and screams didn't help me feel any better._

_A feeling of dread crept into my stomach. As we approached the doors opened and we walked in. I froze as we walked in and the doors closed._

_There were humans suspended upside down from the ceiling. They were tied by chains to their legs. I would have thought it funny if it were not for the fact they were truly afraid and my family watched them with eager and hungry eyes._

" _Ah, Matthew, we were just waiting for you," daddy said smiling at me._

" _What is this?" I asked horrified by what I was seeing. There were about forty humans dangling from the ceiling._

" _Dinner of course," Seraphina said with a smile._

" _Dinner?"_

" _Not all of us deny what we are Matthew."_

" _Daddy?" I asked._

" _Well the others have been training so hard I thought it would be good to treat everyone to a treat," he said._

" _Why are they hanging from there?" I asked._

" _So we can feed of course." he clapped his hands and some of the guards appeared, moving wooden tables over the struggling people. They then placed thin silver bowls over them._

" _Who are these people?"_

" _Do not fear Matthew, I know you are squeamish about human blood. But I also know you miss it so we took humans who were going to die anyway."_

" _What?"_

" _These men are wicked Matthew," Vladimir said._

" _They committed crimes so heinous their people sentenced them to die. Murder, rape, slave trading, no sin was beyond their reach. But now the time has come for them to face retribution."_

" _Why are they upside down?" I asked._

" _So we can draw blood more easily."_

" _What do you mean?"_

" _Easy, we will slit their throats and the blood will pour into the bowls. That way no blood will be wasted," Stefan said._

" _Please hurry Uncle Matthew, we are so hungry," Morphia said._

_They were all hungry. The smell of human blood and beating hearts made my mouth water. I could feel everyone's thirst so strongly it made me even thirstier._

" _But it is wrong."_

" _Why? They are bad men, we are doing the world a kindness by killing them?" one of the hybrids asked._

" _Because we are torturing them that is why. This isn't a feeding, this is sick, sadistic."_

_Seraphina rolled her eyes. Annoyance mixed in her aura. "I remember you singing a different tune years ago. You used to love hunting humans with us."_

_I tried to remember but much of my memories were still lost to the burning. But something deep inside told me her words had truth. Once upon a time I would have ignored the fear and gone through with this. But I was not the same Matthew any more._

" _They may be bad men, but that is not a reason to be like this. This is beneath us. Daddy says we are better than humans, and then surely we should try and be humane. We are being better than this."_

_The hybrids were confused. My words made no sense to them. They could not see my logic._

_Daddy was not happy about what I said. I did not care though; I would not drink human blood. Especially like this._

" _Oh enough of this dribble," Seraphina said._

_She walked forward to the nearest human. She pulled his head back and before I could stop her she slid her nail across his neck and blood began to pour out of his throat._

_You want to know the worst part of my power? It wasn't having to always be able to sense others emotions. It was watching someone die. Watching as all those beautiful lights and colors died and faded. The very light leaving their bodies, leaving nothing but a colorless husk._

_I had killed my fair share of humans and animals. But I always hated this part._

_There was nothing I could do. Soon the heart stopped and the color was gone. Before he died he felt desperation and fear. I had to wonder what he was thinking in his final moments? What do evil men think of before they die? Fear? Regret? Peace?_

_When the last drop of blood dropped Seraphina took the bowl and poured the blood into big goblets of silver, with large ornate jewels on them._

" _Dinner kids," she said._

_Her children surged forward and took the goblets and greedily drank from them. Soon everyone was picking a human and slitting their throat and draining the blood. The pain and horror coming from the humans were too much. I used my power to weave threads of peace and calm around them and they stopped crying._

" _Finally, I hate it when they cry," Mia said._

_Seeing everyone feasting on these poor men was too much for me. I turned and began to walk out of the room. I felt daddy come up behind me and he put his hand on my shoulder._

" _Matthew, come dine with us," he said gently._

" _No, this is not right," I said._

" _We must feed; the hybrids need their strength, as do you my son."_

" _Well I am fine. Animal blood does wonders for me."_

_He turned me around and made me look him in the eye. "You are a god to these things Matthew; do not waste your pity on them."_

" _Everyone deserves pity daddy, Leah taught me that."_

" _Leah is not your mother, nor is she your kin. We know what is best for you. You need to stop denying your natural urges it is not healthy."_

" _Leah knew what was best for me's and she always makes sure me is being healthy."_

_I was getting angry at daddy. I was mad at him, mad at Seraphina and mad in general. I was mad at daddy for doing this no matter his intention, I was mad at Seraphina for being so cold, I was mad at them all for taking me from Leah and Fred-Fred._

_I jerked out of daddy's grip and turned to go back upstairs. "I am's being really sleepy, me be taking nap, leave me's alone."_

_My speech was worsening. When I got really excited or really angry I am speaking wrong. I feel daddy's dissatisfaction and frustration but I ignore him. I am to upset now to care._

* * *

 

I sighed to myself; I hated thinking of that night.

I was brought out of my thoughts when daddy told everyone it was time to quit. I was going to go back to my room and read when daddy stopped me.

"Matthew, a word."

I waited behind as everyone left. I promised some of the hybrids I would play with them later. I was happy none of them treated me any different after the little _incident._ I was worried they would think me weird and ignore me.

Everyone left, except for Vladimir and Stefan who stood with daddy. I was worried they were going to try and talk to me about that night.

We waited until the sounds of heartbeats were so distant we knew we were not being over heard.

"Yes, daddy?" I asked him.

"Matthew, I know it has been difficult trying to readjust to being back with us. But the time has come for you to prepare yourself," daddy said, he was really serious.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Your destiny child," Stefan said.

"The time has come for a new order to rise, you will be the one that helps make it," Vladimir said.

"Everyone keeps saying that but what does it mean?" I asked frustrated.

"Fear not my son," daddy smiled. "As you know we have big plans for you. Until now we have thought it best to wait until you got your bearings, but we have no time to wait. Matthew, we need you to use your power to increase the family's powers beyond their limits."

"But why?...you are going to attack someone?" I said realizing the truth. "That is why you had the Romanians help you. You're not making a family, you are making an army!"

I could tell from their auras I had gotten it right.

"Why? Why make an army? Who are we going to attack?" I asked.

"The Volturi of course," daddy said.

"But they are too strong. Me be told what some of their members can do. Me scared of them, especially Jane, me not want to be hurt by her again!" The memory I had of Jane made me feel sick.

"But with you we can take them all out in a single blow."

"But how? My power can't kill. I mean it can help me kill but I can't just will someone to die."

"Well of course, but with some help you can."

"Just tell me already!" I demanded.

He told me...and I wish he hadn't. For in that moment I realized two things. My daddy, who I loved so much was a monster and I had to get back to Leah.

At any and all costs.

 

**Fusedtwilight: So what is Joham's plane for Matthew and will he be able to contact Leah in time? Please review.**

 


	22. Chapter 22

Focused Madness

Chapter 22

 

**Fusedtwilight: A big thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing. This chapter Matthew tries to contact Leah, will he be successful? And Leah and Fred have a little...** _**talk.** _

 

Fred P.O.V

Had I still been able to sweat I would have made a lake. Had I been able to bruise, I would have been black, blue and red all over.

It had been over two weeks since Matthew was stolen from us. We had no leads. Carlisle had contacted some friends and put them on alert, Alice had been trying to locate Matthew, looking for blind spots in her vision. She hadn't even finished with the western hemisphere yet.

We had no leads. Nahuel had arrived some days ago. He was frantic with worry. I and Leah had told him what happened and he wept. Knowing his family was alive and had Matthew made the poor man feel a mix of emotions.

I had not spoken to Leah much; my shame would not let me. She looked like she wanted to speak with me, but I feared what she had to say.

"Pay attention!" Jasper said, as he flung me across the field.

I landed on my feet and spun around. I had been training practically none-stop. Since I was of no use and I was unable to just stand around and do nothing I was either training or feeding.

I knew Jasper was the best fighter along with Edward. I had asked him to train me. Normally I preferred not to fight, just use my power to keep out of fighting. But I knew that the time for fighting had come, if I wished to be of help I had to better myself. Jasper, Emmett and Edward helped me train. I did not use my power, I needed to learn how not to fight with it.

"You are wondering again," Jasper said flipping me over his head.

I growled and once again landed on my feet.

"You are not yourself today Fred. What is troubling you?" he asked.

I went at him, aiming fist after fist at him, Jasper dodged each one.

I was reminded of the training Riley gave to the newborns before we attacked. Watching Jasper and remembering Riley train I saw the difference. Riley did a good job getting the newborns to focus their blood lust but, had Jasper been doing training I think he would have sharpened their fighting styles a lot more.

I am sure had Jasper been training them they would have given the Cullens a tougher fight. Riley just taught us basic street fighting stuff. Jasper was teaching me some real fighting techniques.

"Nothing is on my mind," I said.

"You are lying." Jasper twisted my arm and bent it behind my back.

I growled in frustration and Jasper used his power to make me calm and he let go of me.

"I sense your emotions Fred, something is troubling you."

I sighed. "I was thinking about Leah."

"Yes, I have noticed you have been avoiding her. Any particular reason why?"

"...I am afraid."

"Afraid of what?"

"That if I speak with her she will yell at me."

"Leah yells at everyone."

"I failed her Jasper, her and Matthew. They took me in and trusted me to protect them. But instead I let my insecurities get the better of me. When I saw her...when I saw her body, her skin was so black and charred, I thought her dead and I kept on thinking it was my fault for not being more open with her about my feelings for her."

"What do you mean?"

"Well. Before he was stolen from us, Leah and I started to develop stronger feelings for one another...romantic feelings."

"I sensed something had changed between you and her. Tell me, what makes you think she is angry with you?"

"I told you, because I failed them."

"Are you sure she is angry with you? You have avoided her and have not been able to gauge her reaction yourself."

He had a point there.

"So she isn't mad at me?"

"I wouldn't say that."

"But you sai-"

"You have been avoiding her Fred; she is not taking it lightly."

"Oh...so, I should go talk to her huh?"

"That would be wise," he smiled, "I think you should take care of this before we continue, I won't train you if your head is miles away."

"I need to train though, Jasper."

"But why? With your power alone you could sneak up on any vampire and kill them before they realize you are even there. You would be the perfect assassin, Fred. You could make a vampire not want to know you are there, so why bother learning to fight?"

"The time may come when I can't use my power. Bella is immune to my power, how do we know one of Joham's daughters don't have a power that can counteract mine? The chances are small I know but I want to be ready just in case."

Jasper nodded, like I had said something he approved of. "Very well, but talk to Leah first. Besides you could use a break, your eyes are turning black."

"I will. Thanks again for helping me train Jasper, I appreciate it."

"I agree with your assessment Fred. We should always prepare for every eventuality. We know little next to nothing about Joham's daughters except what little Matthew told us. Add that to the fact they are breeding more children and who knows what we can expect."

"One of them can control fire, I shudder to think what the others can do."

I thanked Jasper again and headed deeper into the woods. Looking for a deer or maybe a bear if I am lucky. Then I would seek out Leah. Jasper was right; I was not fit to fight until I talked to her.

And I would not let my feelings or issues get in the way, not again.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

Nahuel and I sat next to a creek.

We dipped our feet into the cool water. I had been spending a lot of time with Nahuel since he arrived. It helped give me something to do and it helped ease the pain I was feeling at Fred for ignoring me.

Nahuel had showed up. The second he saw me he ignored everyone else and went straight to me, demanding answers and wanting to know exactly what happened.

We managed to calm him down with his aunt's help. I and Fred told him what happened and that had been the only time Fred had talked around me. I have not seen him around since. Edward told me he has been diligently practicing how to fight with him; Jasper and Emmett were helping, too.

I asked why he would need to learn to fight when he has his power and Edward said Fred needed to find a way to preoccupy himself.

I wished he would use some of that energy to come talk to me.

Nahuel was angry and happy, more angry than happy. Happy his sisters were alive, but angry they had almost killed me and snatched Matthew.

He wanted to find Matthew, but like the rest of us he had to wait for some miracle to happen to help us find him.

As we sat at the creek, I told him of Matthew and what it had been like raising him.

"He ate your neighbor's dog?" he asked with a smile.

"Yeah, he was hunting and poor killer was at the wrong place at the wrong time," I said.

"Killer?"

"Hey, better then spot," I said.

He touched the side that had been burned. I was fully healed now. It took five days for me to fully heal. Most people would have died from infection or shock and if they had been lucky they would have been horribly scared. They would have had to go through many months of recovery. But that's the power of super wolf healing for you.

"I am so sorry what they did to you Leah," he said.

"I told you, it is not your fault."

"Yes it is. I should have been there. I should have gone with you when you asked me to when you left. But...I would have been more of a burden then help. My aunt would have wanted to come and I do not think you would approve of me and her killing humans. I am sorry Leah. I have tried doing it the Cullen way. I really have tried. But I have spent to long drinking human blood. I would have given in to temptation sooner or later and-"

"I understand Nahuel," I said, "I can't just expect you to flip a switch...you're not Bella."

We laughed. That's what I liked to call Bella's self-control. Her switch. One minute she can be all human like and composed then with a flip of a switch she is super vampire bad ass ready to rip her enemies to shreds.

"But still if I had been there, maybe they would have left."

"Or maybe they would have taken you too," I said.

He shook his head. "I made my feelings for my father very clear when we last me. Besides, I don't think he valued me as much as he did my sisters."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Well when first we met he asked if I was gifted. When I told him no, he was very disappointed. I think had if I had a gift he might have tried harder to get me to join him."

"Then be thankful your just a plain old hybrid," I joked.

He smiled and it was a smile a man gave a woman when he was about to be a little naughty.

"There is nothing plain about me Leah. Or have you forgotten?"

I blushed and glared at him. "I doubt being a great fuck is a talent," I said dryly.

"Wow, two years and you still call me a great fuck. I must have made quit the impression," he said sounding giddy.

I hit him on the shoulder. "Don't get to full of yourself; I am sure over a century of practice gives you an edge others lack."

A rather fine edge if I do say so myself.

"What does he look like now? I imagine he must have grown quite a bit."

"Well he looks like he is ten or eleven. Maybe twelve. He still has tan skin and dark hair. His eyes are still coffee brown and they are always filled with warmth. He looks a lot like you. He is going through that phase go through when they grow tall and you know in a few more years they will fill out and grow new muscles to fill out that skinniness. I am sure when he does he will be quit tall and buff. He likes his hair long but I keep it cut short. He's a wild little thing, always running around in his shorts. Only wearing a shirt and shoes when I tell him to. He hates having his hair cut, he always pouts, but I refuse to let it go past his ears. He eats human food but still prefers blood; he has a strong liking for chocolate though. His favorite book is Harry Potter, he likes that Harry always pulls through and never loses his cool even though people are always trying to kill him and his friends and family are always dying. I remember reading him the seventh book, when Hedwig the owl died he cried so hard. He cried harder for Hedwig than any other character. He asked me if there is a heaven for animals, he asked me if he sent them to heaven when he ate them..."

I was unable to go on, my heart ached. I felt like some invisible hand was gripping it and squeezing it. I wiped my face, removing the tears before they had the chance to fall down.

Nahuel placed a hand around my shoulder and comforted me.

"Do not cry Leah, we will get him back, I promise." he leaned forward and kissed me on the lips. It was gentle and sweet. But I pulled back. "What is wrong?" he asked confused.

"It's...I am sorry, but it's just...complicated."

I was thinking of Fred. Thinking how I wished it was his arm around my shoulders and his lips I was feeling against mine.

"Is it something I did?" he asked.

"No, not you. Things have changed these last two years Nahuel. I have...someone else."

He paused; he looked at me with those beautiful eyes, like he was seeing something I could not.

"It is the Fred person, right?"

"Now you sound like Matthew," I muttered.

"Should have figured. Living with another man for two years..." he drew back away from me.

I sighed. "Nahuel, I am sorry bu-"

He held up a hand. "I know Leah. We promised each other no complications. I guess I was just...It's not a big deal."

"Yes it is. Things are complicated between us right now. And it has more to do with personal issues on my part."

"What issues?"

"Immortality. Fred is going to live until someone or something comes along and tears him to pieces. I don't want to live forever but Fred doesn't have a choice."

"Neither do I."

"I know. You are a good guy Nahuel. You're a good person and a good brother. But what I feel for Fred is different then what I feel for you, more personal, more complex. I would like to think it can work out, but the idea of watching mom, Seth, my family and friends age and die, having to leave La Push for decades until everyone who knows me is dead then leave again when people notice I am not aging. Only to repeat the process decades later...I just can't do it. It's bad enough I can't have kids but the thought of spending the rest of my life unchanging actually scares me."

"Why? When you have someone to spend it with."

"Yeah, I would have Matthew, Fred, you, Jake and the Cullens. But mom, Seth and my pack brothers. The idea of watching them die and not being able to stop it, having to watch them grow old and die and live forever without them. I can't do it Nahuel. I want to grow old and die. What meaning will my life have in like a century? Matthew will be grown up and able to take care of himself and there will be a new generation of wolves will be protecting La Push."

"Would it be so bad to live a few extra centuries?"

"I would die sooner or later Nahuel, were very tough to kill but were not invincible."

We were quit for a while. I moved my legs through the water of the creek, enjoying the feel of the cool water against my skin.

"Do you love him?" Nahuel asked.

"Fred? I can't say its love, at least not yet. There is something growing between us, something strong. To be honest I am a little afraid of it. I don't have a good track with love. Sure there was only Sam, but when you're burned like that you tend to avoid the L word. At all costs. I can't ignore it though; I am not that blind nor that cold."

"Then you should talk to him."

"Hard to talk to someone who can make you repulsed by them. I don't know why he doesn't want to talk. I am hurt he has ignored me."

"I am sure he has his reasons. Men are complicated, Leah."

"I know, just once I wish I could find a guy that was simple and easy to understand," I said rolling my eyes.

"Where is the fun in that?" a voice said.

Nahuel let out an angry hiss and jumped up and spun around, I was close to phasing until I saw it was Fred.

"Jesus Fred, how long where you there?" I asked.

"Not long."

"Why didn't we sense you?" Nahuel asked looking unsettled.

"Sorry. I was going for a walk. I was using my power to keep from being disturbed. I caught your scents and decided to see what you were up to. So sorry, my fault, I forgot to take the shield down," he said sounding sorry.

I said nothing. I was ticked off at him, he spent all this time ignoring me well I was going to give him some of the same treatment, see how he likes it.

"Actually, I was wondering if I could speak to you Leah. Alone," he said glancing over at Nahuel.

"Why?" I asked trying to sound cold and indifferent.

He flinched like I had struck him. "Well, there was something I wanted to say."

"What could you have to say that is so important?" I asked.

He fidgeted. He hated drama and I was starting to make some for him. I didn't care though, I wanted him to feel uncomfortable, and I wanted him to feel something after two weeks of silence.

"I will leave the two of you alone," Nahuel said.

"You don't have to leave," I said.

He gave me a smirk. "You two need to talk, and I should go see if Carlisle has found any new leads."

He leaned forward and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I saw Fred's eyes flash with something like anger but then it was gone. Nahuel left, leaving us alone.

It was quit at first; only the sound of the birds in the trees and the water in the creek could be heard.

"Leah," he began but I turned my back to him. "Leah please, I am sorry. I know you are angry at me and you have every right to be."

"Damn right," I said.

"Leah I was confused, I was upset and angry. I was mad at myself and I handled myself poorly, I am sorry for ignoring you. But I was afraid."

"Afraid?" I turned around to face him, "what were you afraid of?"

"You."

"What?"

"I was afraid you were mad at me. For not being there to protect you."

I growled. I walked right up to him and began to slap him so hard it would have sent a normal human into a coma. "You stupid, self-important, egotistical, selfish, self-loving, narcissistic, MAN!" I screamed as I hit him.

He did nothing to stop the blows. But my hands were really starting to hurt now. Finally he grabbed my arms when the smell of blood hit the air.

My hands were bruised and slightly bleeding from hitting him. Damn vampires and their freaky super hard skin.

"Leah, you're hurting yourself!"

"So, it will heal," I said. Even as I spoke I could feel my hands heal, the pain was slowly turning into a dull ache and in a few moments they would be healed.

"All this time I wondered why you were ignoring me and I find out it was because you were having an Edward episode?"

"A what?"

"A fucking emo thing! Blaming yourself for shit that you could not have stopped or controlled." I shouted at him. "Why the fuck would I be mad at you?"

"Because I wasn't there Leah, because of me Matthew was stolen and you were almost killed. I saw you Leah, I thought you were dead, half your body was black and cracked." a look of sorrow and pain creased his face. "If I had been there, if I hadn't run away from my feelings, I could have made them leave, we could have run and I could have kept us safe, we could have come back and the Cullen's and wolves could have protected us."

His hand caressed the part of my face that had been burned. "You have every right to be angry with me Leah, I failed you. I promised I would keep you safe and I failed miserably. I avoided you because I was mad at myself and I was afraid to hear the words fall from your lips. So I tried to distance myself from you, but I only felt worse because a part of me wanted to go to you. I finally broke, I have been missing you so much I had to find you and talk to you. I found your scent and his. I wasn't going to interrupt but-"

"Were you eavesdropping on us?" I asked.

"A little," he said.

"How much did you hear?"

"The part how immortality scares you and there is something between us but you don't want to call it love yet."

I felt the blood rush to my face. "Were you spying on us?" I asked.

"Not exactly. I knew you were with Nahuel and I didn't want to interrupt anything."

"There was nothing to interrupt; besides, I don't think I can think about romance right now."

"I know what you mean. I am going crazy now. I want to be out there doing something but what can I do?"

"I hear you have been training with Jasper."

"Yeah. We don't know what we will face when we find Matthew and I want to be ready."

"I am glad someone is confident we will be finding him. It's like with everyday people get more and more discouraged."

Fred took my hand in his and gave it a gentle squeeze. "We will find him Leah. I promise, we will find him no matter what. We will find our boy and bring him back home."

I didn't say anything when he said our boy. Matthew was as much his as he was mine, he had nurtured Matthew as much as I had.

"Fred. If anything happens to me...promise me you will take care of Matthew."

"Nothing will happen to you Leah," Fred said firmly. His face was set in a hard, serious pose, putting power into his words.

"Let's be honest Fred. There is no telling what we will be facing, that bitch Seraphina almost fried me. I want you to promise me that if anything happens to me you will look after Matthew."

"Leah-"

I held up a hand. Stopping him. "Please Fred. Promise me."

He sighed and held my hand close to his hand. "I promise Leah, I will look after him like he was my own son, because he already is."

His free hand rubbed my hand. He looked at me with such a tender look. Maybe it was the moment, maybe it was the feeling of him touching me, maybe it was the need for comfort, but before I knew it we were both leaning forward and before I knew it we were kissing one another.

It wasn't rough, or passionate or explosive. It was sweet, gentle, light and tender. His lips were cold as ice but still felt good against mine. I brought my hand up and touched his hair. It felt like silk between my fingers. I had wanted to touch his hair for years now. I admit to having a few fantasies of me running my fingers over his head. Now with us kissing it seemed even better then imagined.

We pulled back and looked at one another. My hand was still touching his hair and he smiled. It made my stomach feel warm and a familiar feeling washed over me. A feeling I hadn't felt since Sam and I were together, a feeling that felt so right and proper, a feeling that made the world seem to make since.

Being apart from Fred while he was in his little mood made me realize how much I missed him as well.

I let go of him and turned to walk to the creek.

"Leah?" Fred asked.

"I want to go for a swim," I said.

I lifted my shirt over my head. I heard Fred gasp in surprise. I wasn't wearing a bra. I unbuttoned my paints and pulled them down. I turned my head and saw he was looking at me with eyes the size of plates and his mouth hanging open.

I laughed and jumped into the creek. The cool water rushed over me, I broke the surface of the water and saw Fred was still looking at me shocked.

"You coming in?" I asked him.

He closed his mouth. Emotions flashed through those amber colored eyes of his. I wished I had Matthew's power, so I could see what he was feeling right now. First he took off his shirt. Then his shoes and socks and finally his paints.

My breathing hitched. He was still as perfect as he was when I caught him naked in the shower. I let my eyes roam his body, drinking in every single inch. He smiled when he saw my eyes roaming his body. He gather my pants and shirt and folded them neatly with his and set them besides the creek.

I giggled, even now he was still so neat and proper.

The sunlight broke through the clouds and I stopped giggling. Fred sparkled like vampires did when sunlight touched their skin. I had only seen a few sparkle. I always thought it was kind of girly, but it did make them look a lot more beautiful than they already were.

But now seeing Fred sparkle and he seemed… I don't know why I was having such a reaction to him now. I had seen him in the sun many times before. I had always enjoyed the view, but not like this. Maybe it was because I was seeing him in a different light, maybe it was because I was seeing him naked or maybe it was because we had crossed the line between friends and something more.

He stepped into the creek. He was tall enough that the water only came up to his nipples. He walked slowly to me, his face serious, yet gentle. The light from his skin reflected off the water, making the water around him seem to glow with light.

He wrapped his arms around me and I had to squint my eyes as the light from the sparkles hit my eye. I had to wonder if vampires helped inspire the appearance of angels. If some human saw a vampire in the sun and somehow lived to tell the tale they might assume they saw an angel.

With their beauty and the sparkling skin it was easy to see how some human could make such a mistake.

I shivered when he touched me, he was colder then the water was and the water was the perfect temperature for a nice swim. We kissed and it was like before, gentle, sweet, tender. I could feel his reaction to the kiss though.

But this was not about sex. Although it sounded like a good idea, this was about something more. Connection, affection, courtship.

Most people see a movie or go grab something to eat. I go skinny dipping in a creek. Then again, I think me and Fred have already gone beyond the boundaries of the first date thing.

We spent the next few hours just swimming. Not talking much, but then again there wasn't much to say. We played a little, splashing one another. Although Fred's splashes were like tidal waves on a stormy day compared to mine. Sometimes we would stop and kiss some more. Then we would swim after one another playfully then kiss some more.

Sometimes we would break apart and drift apart and swim around, then we would swim close to one another and bump shoulders or touch one another, maybe have a quick kiss. Then we would break apart and do the process again. We were like two great wolves. Circling one another, dancing with one another.

It was like something else was telling us what to do, something deep inside us that drove us to do this bizarre ritual.

Fred swam to a boulder at the edge of the creek and sat down on it. He cocked his finger at me in a _come hither_ motion. I swam over to him and I wrapped my arms around his neck. He moved me so I was sitting on his lap. I kept my arms wrapped around him and we made out a bit.

We didn't have sex, though there were times I was tempted to give in and give it a try. But I was not ready. _We_ weren't ready. Hypocritical I know, seeing how I didn't wait long to jump Nahuel's bones. But Nahuel was different. Fred meant more to me and I didn't want to rush into it with Fred...okay, maybe I did.

We watched the sky; it was a beautiful, sunny day. A rare day in Washington.

"I wish Matthew was here," Fred said.

"What?" I asked looking at him like he was nuts.

"What? No, no, no. I mean I wish he was here with us."

I raised a brow at him.

"I mean I wish he was with us and we were all playing in the water and having fun and watching the sun together. Not the naked bits of course."

I laughed seeing the flustered and irritated look on his face. "I know what you mean. He would probably make some comment on how warm and fuzzy our colors are."

"Or dive under water and hunt for fish," Fred said.

I laughed. "Yeah, I can so imagine him popping out of the water with a fish in his mouth and going 'Look Leah I caught a fish, aren't I the best?'."

We laughed. The image was so clear in my head. Soon my laughter turned into small sobs. Pain washed over me then, the ach of his absence was more pronounced than ever and I could not help but cry.

Fred held me close and let me cry. "I miss him so much Fred," I cried.

"I know," he said. His face was a mix of sorrow and pain.

"We'll get him back right? We'll get him back and everything can go back to normal right?" I asked.

"Of course. Nothing will stop us from finding him," Fred said.

We sat there in the creek. If some person had stumbled upon us they would think they would have walked into something very private and intimate. We may have looked like we should be on the cover of some romantic novel, but below the surface our souls ached for the loss of our boy. Our chiled. Our son.

* * *

Matthew P.O.V

I sat in my room.

It had been a week since daddy told me what he planned. It had been a bad week.

I had become withdrawn and isolated from my family. Knowing what daddy had planned for us darkened my mood considerably.

How could I play with my nephews and nieces knowing what they would soon partake in?

I hadn't been eating much either. Neither blood nor food could fill this hole I was now feeling. I felt cold and sick. I felt disgusted. I felt like someone had reached into my heart and tore open a hole.

A hole that had once been the idea of what I had of my father. My daddy. I had thought him as a hero, as something godly. Someone who was never wrong. He was my father and he could do no wrong.

But now the idea I had of him was gone. Destroyed, obliterated. The idea was gone and only a hole remained where it had been.

I was confused. A part of me refused to believe he was anything but the daddy I knew and loved, but after what he told me he planned to do I could not ignore that something was fundamentally wrong with my family.

I started thinking things, dark thing, forbidden things.

I was starting to question everything about my family. What they did, how they lived, everything. And as of late questions that had been lost in the rapture I felt to be reunited with them.

Once I remembered an image of my mother Adora bloody and looking like a victim of a horrific murder. Daddy told me mommy didn't love me, she only kept me because he convinced her to keep me.

But this other memory showed me a mommy who loved me, who wanted me, who didn't die as a result of me killing her. She died as a result of daddy's refusal to save her.

I tried to remember more of my past. But the problem was every time I tried to remember past the fire the more it hurt. Sometimes I would remember something. But when next I recalled it much later it was different from how I remembered.

It didn't make sense. Either the pain stopped me or the confusion of the memories did. Maybe when Jane hurt me it did something to my head? Maybe when Rosemary's was using her power on me so we could hide her power did something.

Maybe her memories she created was what I was seeing. But why would she make me remember mommy hating me?

Nothing made sense! I wish Leah was here. She would hold me and pet my head and tell me everything was okay and she would make things make sense.

I had to find a way to call Leah. I had to find a way to escape. Without me daddy's plane won't work and people won't die.

But how can I contact Leah? Daddy has no phones and I know how to use a Canadian phone but not how to use a Romanian phone. Even if I contacted Leah or the Cullen's where would I run? I don't know the landscape and Mia would find me. Her power is having a sense of smell stronger then even a vampires.

I could wrap myself in an aura like Fred's. No one would find me then. But...what would daddy do then? What would happen to my nephews and nieces? What would daddy do with them? I know he won't change his mind, I am remembering the resolve I am seeing in him when he told me his plan.

I don't want any more people hurt. But it seems like no matter what I chose to do people will be hurt.

I sense Rosemary approaching. I had learned the taste of her aura before. She opened my door and closed it behind her.

"Matthew?" she asked.

"Yes?"

She sat down on my bed. I could see worry and concern in her aura. "Matthew, are you okay? You haven't been right since father told you his plane."

I sat up and faced her. Rosemary had been my sister and nursemaid for years. I could trust her.

"Rosemary. Do you remember your mommy?" I asked.

"Yes, why?"

"Do you ever miss her?"

"No. Why?"

"But why not? She was your mother; she bore you into this world. She died for you."

"Matthew she was a human. I have small affection for her but remember, humans are our inferiors. She served her purpose. Nothing more, nothing less."

"But don't you think she deserved more?"

"More what? How many humans can say they helped birth a god?"

"But we're not gods, Rosemary."

"Compared to them we are."

She touched my cheek soothingly. "Matthew what is wrong?"

"Well it's just...I understand why we have to kill humans to survive. But don't you think what we are doing is over kill? We kill a small handful to sustain ourselves. But thousands will die if we do this. Mommies and their babies too. Daddy says humans are stupid because they kill one another so much. But aren't we doing the same thing? Mass murder just doesn't seem right, no matter the reason."

"Matthew, I know it seems extreme. But this is the only way we can avenge our sisters. Don't they deserve retribution? If we are to be safe, if we are to protect the children we must do this. Just remember it will be quick and painless, they will not suffer at all."

I was not feeling any better by her words. In fact seeing how her aura showed indifference and belief in what we were doing was right.

"Yeah, I guess," I said.

"You should come play outside. You need some fresh air. I swear you and Morphia are alike. She spends almost all her time in dream land."

Just then I had an idea. An idea so crazy...it could work.

"Hey Rosemary. Morphia...how does her power work?"

"Well, she could explain it better than I can. See Imagine the dream world made up of bubbles. Each bubble is a person's dream world. Their own world so to speak. Morphia is capable of entering those bubbles. She can interact with people in their bubbles, their dreams."

"So, she could find anyone she wanted?"

"Well, yeah sure. But they have to be asleep and it is really tough. There are billions of dreamers Matthew. We were lucky to have found you."

"How does she find people?"

"Well she found you because we told her all about you. She knew what to look for, a mind like hers. She said your mind stood out. Our minds are superior to humans so our dreams are more vivid. More real."

"Has she ever...taken someone with her for a ride?"

"No. She might be able to do it, I am not sure she has never tried."

I got up and took her hand. "Okay let's go play with everyone!"

I ran down the halls with Rosemary. We passed some humans and like usual they bowed in respect. Soon we were outside back in the garden where everyone was playing. They were happy to see me. I paid little attention to them; I sought out Morphia and found her with Hypnia. She was older now; she was growing so quick her mother was always having to buy her new clothes to fit her rapidly growing body.

I walked over to Hypnia who was watching over her sleeping daughter. "Hello Matthew, I am glad to see you are out and about," she said.

"Hello Hypnia, how are you and Morphia?" I asked with a smile.

I tried to keep my excitement and nervousness from leaking out and infecting the others. Sometimes my power did that, sometimes my mind wonders and I forget I have to keep my power in check and it starts making people feel what I feel like when I accidentally made the Cullens turn weird that time.

"Is she sleeping?" I asked.

"Yes, lazy girl. Spends too much time in dream land."

I sat next to Morphia. I used my power to rouse her from sleep. Her eyes fluttered open, she rubbed her eyes. "Hello Morphia," I said.

"Uncle Matthew?" she asked with a yawn.

"I was wondering, could we play in dreams again? We had a lot of fun last time."

I wove strands of agreement and wanting to participate into her aura. "Sure, that sounds like fun."

I wrapped my arm around her shoulders and her head fell on my chest. "Hypnia, could you help me?" I asked her.

"Sure thing Matthew, sweet dreams."

A wave of sleep washed over me.

_You got that right._

* * *

 

Leah P.O.V

Fred and I headed for the Cullen's, we did not speak, but our mood was so much better than it had been in weeks. You didn't have to be Jasper to see we were feeling good.

It was a bit dampened when we arrived and found no new news. It was the same dead end we had been chasing.

We were all sitting in a circle, talking. Nessie was with us. She had grown. She was three years old but she looked seven or eight. She had grown her hair out. Like Charlies it was curly, but her eyes were still brown like Bella's had been and she still had Edward's hair color.

"Well I am sorry to say we have no clue as to his whereabouts," Carlisle said.

"We have contacted all our contacts and asked they keep an eye out for him," Edward said.

"Let me guess Alice has had no visions either?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

"No, I haven't," Alice said looking disappointed.

"Maybe we are looking in the wrong place," Emmett said.

"Where would you suggest?" Alice asked.

"Volterra," he said.

"What do the Volturi have to do with this?" I asked.

"Think of it. What if they let Joham live?"

"Why would they do that?" Jasper asked.

"Well what if before they got to him Joham told them about Matthew? A way to keep himself alive you know. What if they brought him to Aro. Aro reads his mind and sees what Matthew can do. I mean Jane was attacked by his power in self-defense so she can prove how strong he is. Aro decides to keep Joham alive so he can use him to control Matthew."

"Then why didn't they come for him themselves?" I asked.

"Well, because Aro knows Alice would be watching them closely after they came to kill us right? So he has Joham look for Matthew. Makes him make the decisions so Aro isn't seen making them. Like when Victoria was using that newborn to raise her army and we couldn't see it was her."

"But how would Aro know we would be responding to any threat to Matthew or Leah?" Fred asked.

"Matthew said he met a girl in his dreams called Morphia. His sister Hypnia said it was her daughter," I said recalling what was said that night. "Apparently she can find you in your dreams like Freddy Kruger or something."

"Exactly. See what if Matthew tells her about you and us, she goes back to wakey-wakey world and Aro reads her mind."

"They also hinted there were more of them too," I said.

"But who could be fathering these children?" Esme asked.

"You don't think Joham..." Bella trailed off unable to finish. I admit the thought made me ill to think about it, too.

"No. My father may be a lot of things but he would not procreate with his own daughters. Also he wants to make a super race. Having my sisters mate with mortal men would weaken the vampire part," Nahuel said.

"Exactly! What if Aro is using his guard to supply Joahm with what he needs to make hybrids who are more vampire then human. Think about it, we see how quick Nessie grows and she is only half, imagine how quick a hybrid could grow if it was more pure vampire."

"They could be easier to control then the immortal children or newborns and Aro would have enough time to fill their heads with all kinds of crap and with Chelsea it would be easy as pie," Rose said.

Carlisle got an intense look on his face like he just had an idea that helped connect the dots.

"What is it?" I asked him.

"It is possible," Edward said to Carlisle.

"What? What is it?" I asked impatiently.

"Tell her about Eleazar's research," Edward said.

"You know how Eleazar from the Denali coven was once a member of the Volturi right?" Carlisle asked.

"Yeah, the one who could figure out what kind of freaky power you have right?" I asked.

"Yes. See years ago he had a theory that our gifts are hereditary. He noticed that many vampires with gifts who had vampiric relatives who they were related to as humans shared gifts. He began to research the idea for years."

"It makes sense. I mean look at Bella, Nessie and me," Edward said. "I have difficulty reading Charlie; he could be the one that Bella got her gift from. Also when you look at others like Jane and Alec or Aro and Didyme-"

"Who?" Jake asked.

"Didyme, Aro's sister," Carlisle said.

"Aro has a sister?" I asked. God, I can't even begin to imagine what his sister is like.

"Think again Leah, Didyme was the opposite of Aro in every way," Edward said.

"When you say "was"…?"

"She died, long before I met the Volturi," Carlisle said. "She was Marcus's mate. Her death turned him into what he is today. I have seen many pictures of her, she was really beautiful. Aro turned her a decade after he became a vampire. He hoped she would have a power useful to his cause. Unlike Aro she could project an aura of pure happiness. Similar to what Fred can do. Only she made you happy. Simple as that. Even the guard who knew her spoke of her like she was the virgin Mary incarnate. She was the light in the dark, the warm feeling that warms the heart. To be in her presence was to know true peace of mind and release from all the pain in the world. Her image helped inspire many deities."

"Sounds like she was a nice woman," I said.

"She was. I would have liked to meet her."

"But what does Elezar's research have to do with Emmett's theory?" Fred asked.

"Well he left before he could complete his research. But his notes are still there. And I think Joham may have also had the same thoughts as Eleazar. When Matthew increased his power, Eleazar saw that Matthew's blood was too refined, too perfect. And many of Joham's children have special abilities."

"Hot damn that's it!" Emmett said excitedly. "Joham and Aro are working together to make an army of vampire human hybrids with special gifts. I mean we all know Aro is a freak when it comes to collecting stuff right, he would love having his own private army of hybrids with gifts! Think of man, they could go out in daylight and help the Volturi interact with humans more easily and they could hunt vampires or collect humans for them to eat in daylight!"

"And Aro is keeping Joham alive so he can control Matthew! With Chelsea it wouldn't be too hard to make Joham loyal to Aro. Especially if Aro would help him make more super hybrids!" Jake said.

"Wow, you're smarted than I thought Emmett," I said impressed by how Emmett pieced it all together.

"My god! What will we do when the Volturi return with an army of super hybrids and Matthew on their side. That Seraphina girl could fry us where we stood!" Rose said.

We were all becoming restless. Emmett's theory had us on a role and it was the only lead we had to go on.

"We should have Aunt Alice check first," Nessie said. "I mean we can't go to Volterra unless we know for sure. I don't think they would like us popping up and accusing them of such stuff."

"Nessie is right," Esme said.

"Alice?" Jasper asked.

"In all the excitement I have not thought to look into the Volturi," Alice said.

She took a deep breath in and out. Her face became blank and slack. For a moment all was quiet. If she could not see the Volturi then it would confirm Emmett's theory. With all the hybrids running around they would be safe from Alice and her power.

Then her eyes flew open and she started to scream.

"Alice!" Jasper yelled grabbing onto her.

"My god! Volterra is on fire!" Edward said looking horrified.

Alice screamed some more and Carlisle and Jasper tried to snap her out of it.

"What do you mean Volterra is on fire!" Rose asked Edward.

"I mean the whole damn city is burning to the ground. There are people dying in the fire, burning alive!"

"All of it burning, the whole city, the people, even the Volturi are burning!" Alice said, her face in pain. Esme was holding her face soothingly. "It was like the second I began to search for them the vision appeared. It has already been decided. Someone is going to kill the Volturi and they are going to destroy the city to do it!"

"But who could have such power?" Bella asked.

She was holding Nessie away from Alice. I don't blame her; I would do the same if it was Matthew. I would not want him anywhere near such a scene.

"Seraphina," I said, "she can start fires with her mind. Imagine what she could do it Matthew jump started her power?"

"So much for my theory," Emmett said.

"I am sorry, it was just so horrible, and I saw so many humans dying. But it was like they were already asleep," Alice said.

I felt a tug on my mind then, it made me wobble.

"Leah?" Fred asked seeing me shake.

"Sorry, it's just...I feel funny," I said.

"What do you mean?"

"It's like..."

" _Leah," a voice whispered._

"Matthew?"

The floor was rushing at me. I heard people shouting my name. The last thing I saw was Fred hovering over me. Then the darkness began to creep into my awareness and I fell asleep.

* * *

_I woke up in a vast forest._

_The air was hot and muggy, the trees were tall and exotic, I could hear the sound of many animals in the night and I knew I was not in La Push, or even Washington._

_I stood up and I saw I was not alone. Matthew stood in front of me._

" _Matthew?" I asked._

" _Leah!" he shouted._

_He ran at me and wrapped his arms around me. He felt so real._

" _Oh Leah, I am so happy I found you. I tapped into Morphia's power and amplified it and I tried finding you but you were not sleeping so me is making you dream so I am finding you!"_

" _Wait, this is real? Matthew is this really you?" I asked._

_He looked at me his face streaked with tears._

" _Yes Leah it is being me!"_

_A sound of an animal shrieking close by could be heard. It sounded like a little girl shrieking in primal rage._

_Matthew's head jerked to the side._

" _Leah you must be listening now, me not have time! Daddy has me and he has planes for me and us all, Leah Daddy is going to burn down Volterra."_

" _Alice had a vision of it burning!" I said._

_I could hear something running through the woods, coming for us._

" _It is me Leah, daddy is going to use me to kill people an-"_

" _ENOUGH!"_

_A figure broke through the shadows. The animals stopped their chatter and it was silent as the grave._

_The girl was about the same age as Matthew. And she looked pissed._

_Her hair is black and curly, it goes past her waist. Her skin is a bit lighter then Matthew's, a sort of Latin color. Her eyes are black and full of anger._

" _That is quite enough Uncle Matthew."_

" _Morphia-"_

" _No!" she waved her hand in the air, silencing Matthew. "You were about to reveal everything uncle, I won't let you ruin everything!"_

" _This can't happen Morphia!"_

" _Oh but it will uncle, when I tell grandpa he will be very cross with you. You used me!"_

" _I had to," Matthew said desperately._

" _I trusted you!"_

" _People will die!" Matthew screamed at her._

" _So what? They're just humans!"_

" _Your too late bitch, we already know you plan," I said to her._

_She sneered at me. "Half-thing, you may be a vicious monster in the real world, but here I am god."_

_The wind began to blow strongly. The shadows became thicker, blacker, colder. I could hear things moving in the darkness. Glowing eyes blinked at us from the shadows. Matthew held onto me tight._

" _You will not leave this world, beast. I will trap you in a thousand nightmares from which you will never awake!"_

 

**Fusedtwilight: Uh oh. Morphia is about to go Nightmare on elm street on Leah and Matthew. Next chapter, Matthew has warned Leah but what will be the consequences? Left with no other choice Joham decides the time has come to ensure Matthew never betray him again, but for that to happen Matthew...will have to die. Please review.**

 


	23. Chapter 23

Focused Madness

Chapter 23

 

**Fusedtiwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing. This is it, Matthew makes his final stand against Joham, Joham tells Matthew his plane and how he first started on this path and Matthew...will die.**

 

Joham P.O.V

I ran out into the gardens.

I had been talking to Vladimir and Stefan about our planes when Seraphina came rushing in. "Father come quickly, it's Matthew and Morphia!"

Immediately I ran to the gardens. The children were gathered around Morphia and Matthew. They parted for me and I saw Hypnia was hovering over her daughter. She was shaking her, trying to wake her up.

"What is going on?" I demanded.

"Father I can't wake Matthew or Morphia!"

"What happened?"

"Matthew asked Morphia if she would take him to the dream world so they could play," she said, "but after a while Morphia seemed to become agitated about something and was muttering in her sleep, say Matthew must stop and to not do it. I tried to wake her up but it's not working!"

"She is really angry, I can smell it," Mia said. Then she let out a gasp and covered her nose. "Argh, that smell!"

"What is it?" I asked.

Mia sense of smell was beyond the capabilities of even a full vampire, it even bordered into the metaphysical. There were times when she could smell scents coming from Morphia when she walked the dreaming world.

"I have smelled it before; it was from that girl, that she-wolf."

"Why would you be smelling her? Seraphina roasted her," Sarah said.

"Did any of you actually see her die?" I asked.

"No, she was in the house when I set it on fire," Seraphina said,

"Father...earlier Matthew was asking how Morphia found him in his dreams, he even asked if she could find anyone in the dreaming realm," Rosemary said.

I realized what was going on now. "He is communicating with the she-wolf!" I roared.

"But how did she survive?" Seraphina asked.

"Doesn't matter! Wake him up now!" I roared.

"But how, I can't wake either of them up!" Hypnia said.

"Then were going to have to use some incentive. Brand."

She stepped forward.

"Help wake Matthew up would you?"

She raised her hand and it began to glow hot with heat. She walked forward, her hand heading for his right shoulder.

* * *

_Matthew's dream_

_Morphia was very angry right now._

_I could see her anger, her sense of betrayal and hurt. I felt bad for hurting her like this but it had to be done._

_The shadows were becoming more solid now. They had grown glowing eyes and were moving slowly towards us. The shadows were whispering, talking to us, telling us the horrible things they were going to do to us._

_I had to give her credit, she had a good imagination. But I was not going to let her hurt Leah._

_I stood in front of Leah protectively._

" _Go away Morphia. I won't let you hurt Leah!"_

" _And I won't let you ruin everything grandfather has worked for!" she yelled._

_I focused my power on her. I fill her with fear in all its black and red glory I hit her so hard with it. She threw her hands up in the air and screamed and disappeared into the shadows._

" _That should keep her away," I said._

" _Matthew where are you?"_

_I turned to Leah. "Leah, daddy is holding me in a place called Romania. There are these guys called Vladimir and Stefan and they are working with him to kill the Volturi!"_

" _What? How?"_

" _Me, I am daddy's weapon. He is going to use me to-"_

_A searing hot pain hit my shoulder. It was so painful and unexpected it brought me to my knees. "Matthew!" Leah rushed to my._

_I looked at my shoulder; the flesh was blistering and boiling._

_I could feel myself being pulled back to the physical world, no matter how hard I tried to fight it my mind in a desperate attempt to protect my body was pulling me back._

" _Find me Leah! I am in the castle of-"_

* * *

 

I woke up and was aware of two things.

I could smell the smell of my flesh burning, Brand was in front of me, and her hand glowed with heat. Second, I was surrounded by my family, and they were not happy.

"Matthew what have you done!" daddy demanded more angry then I have ever seen him.

"He used me!" Morphia was hugging her mother and looking me with a look of extreme hate. "He used me to call that wolf girl!"

There were snarls and growls. Anger, hurt, betrayal, shock, were mixing in the aura's of my kin. They were not happy with me right now. Their blood lust was growing as well. They were purer vampires then me so the vampire instincts were stronger in them. There were times during training when they seriously hurt one another, and that was by accident.

I got up, wincing as the pain in my shoulder flared to life. "I did what I had to do daddy, what you are doing is wrong!" I looked at my sisters, at my nephews and nieces. "Listen to me, this is not right, what daddy has planned is evil! We are not gods. Far from it, if anything we are devils. Are actions are corrupted by greed, hubris and ambition. We may kill humans to sustain ourselves, but this is genocide! We need not kill a whole city of innocent humans to kill a coven, no matter who they are, please, I beg you, rethink your actions, be better than this!"

I could see my words had little to no impact on them.

"It is useless Matthew, they know their place, they know what path they must follow and they have the resolve to see it through. I wish I could say the same for you," daddy said.

Disappointment radiated off him.

Instead of feeling sad he was disappointed at me I felt anger at him.

"What path? What place? All they know is the world you have built for them. They know nothing of the outside world. It is your dreams and ambitions that fills them daddy, they'd not know how beautiful the world is being, or of all the lights that fill the people in it. You tell them no truth but your truth, which is nothing then a bunch of lies you use to manipulate us for your own ends!"

Gregory, Rosemary's child let out a roar of anger and grabbed me and slammed me into the tree. The bark broke and splintered and my shoulder erupted with pain.

"How dare you!" he growled his teeth bared.

I growled back and gripped his arms. He was stronger than me though, he was stronger vampire genes saw to that.

"He loves us, he protects us, he gave you life and you make such horrible lies!"

"They are not lies!"

"Then prove it, how can you say he manipulates you or us when you have no proof?"

My hands shook. I had an idea how to prove it. But I fear the truth. I had a theory of why I had so many fractured memories. If I was right then my whole life was a lie and the father I thought I knew never existed.

I looked over to Rosemary. She looked really tense right now. Another reason a part of me hoped I was wrong...because then even my family was a lie.

I focused my power onto the part of Gregory that was special. That part of him he gained from his mother. The special ability that refreshed all memories. With him touching me it was easy for me to activate it. Before I knew it all my memories returned to me.

And I despaired.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

"Matthew!" I screamed.

I looked around wildly, looking for Matthew. All I found were the Cullen's, Fred, Nahuel, and Jake.

"Leah what happened?" Carlisle asked.

"It was Matthew, he found me, and he used Morphia's power to find me."

The room was filled with an invisible energy I could only describe as excitement.

Nahuel and Fred looked happier then I had seen them. I didn't want to mention what happened, how a burning mark appeared on his shoulder.

"Where is he? Does the Volturi have him?" Fred asked.

"No, it's the Romanians."

"What?" everyone said.

"Matthew said it was those same guys who came here when the Volturi showed up. They're the ones breeding those super hybrids. Matthew said he was in Romania in a castle."

"What castle?" Carlisle asked.

"I don't know, before he could tell me something happened, it was like-I winced- someone was burning his shoulder, I think they figured out what he was doing."

"What else did he tell you?" Nahuel asked.

"Carlisle, its Joham. He's the one who torch's Volterra. Matthew said he is going to use him to do it."

"But Matthew's power isn't destructive like that," Jasper said.

"No...But Seraphina's is. Remember what she did to me and my house? My god, if Matthew increased her power by twelve it would be like a hydrogen bomb going off," I said.

"So what do we do?" Esme asked. "We have to find Matthew, we can't let Joham do this."

"Carlisle...it might be wise to include them in on this," Edward said.

Carlisle looked at him and they had a look. Like they were having a private conversation, which of course they probably were.

"Care to share?" Nahuel asked annoyed by the one sided conversation.

"Do to the circumstances...I think I think that-"

"Carlisle you can't be serious!" Alice said.

"It is the only way Alice," he said gently.

I looked at Alice, knowing Carlisle's decision must be pretty bad for her to question it.

"Do to the dire situation, I believe we need to inform the Volturi of the situation."

The room was deadly silent.

"Shut the fuck up," I said.

* * *

Matthew P.O.V

You ever wonder what it would be like to remember...well...everything?

Every thought, every image, every idea, everything, even the dreams?

Well it is very unpleasant.

Or maybe that is how I see it because I remembered how my mommy died, but I remember now that because her death upset me so much daddy soon had Rosemary modify my memories so I wasn't as attached to her.

I remembered when I first killed a human, I had been so upset because I had sensed their fear, their pain, and their death. Daddy had Rosemary change my memory so that I enjoyed the kill.

When I first questioned daddy about his mission in life he had Rosemary wipe the memories that made me think of different things.

Every time I ever questioned him, every time I did something to make him fear I was going to rebel or was becoming too human for his tastes he would have Rosemary use her power to fill my head with his lies.

I was too valuable to him to lose, so he made me his slave.

My whole life was a lie.

A lie fabricated to control me, to manipulate me. My sisters knew what daddy was doing. They loved me, this I know. But they believed in daddy so they did not question his wisdom.

I screamed in rage and used my power on Gregory. Like Fred-Fred I used repulsion on Gregory and he jumped away, clutching his head as if he saw something that greatly offended his sight.

I clutched my head and roared in pain. When I remembered everything I remembered the pain of the fire and I remembered what it was like that fateful night when I was shattered.

* * *

_Matthew's memory_

_Where am I?_

_What am I?_

_Who am I?_

_Me is opening eyes now. Me is seeing the light coming from above. Pretty white orb in sky is really pretty, but it hurts my eyes if I look at it too much so I am looking away._

_Head is hurting now lots. Lots and lots of pain. Body is feeling very weaks._

_Me hold head and sit ups. Me try and think of something...anythings...who I ams?...umm..._

_Matthew._

_I am being Matthew._

_Yes, me is not knowing why but Matthew is sounding right._

_Yayyy, me is being Matthew!_

_Matthew is a boy, Matthew is having long black hair and brown skin and...his head still hurts bad._

_Me stand up and me is feeling thirsty. Me smell something wet and me is thinking water might help._

_Me is following trail that leads me to a very big puddle of water. Me lean down and start sipping from the water. Then me is hearing a small heart beat, very close._

_A light is appearing under water. Me think it is me. Me is having eyes browner then skin, hair is long and messy, there is some leaves on it. Me feel face, admiring meself and looking at self in wonder. This is Matthew, this thing in water?_

_Me is thinking something odd. Light in water is looking different then how me is looking. For one thing it is really, really long. And there is something about the light that...in me head is being tasting like...hunger...patience...savage calm...anticipation._

_Me lean closer into water to get better look of odd light. When me close enough color change and me have half second to think...danger!_

_Then before me is knowing something comes shooting out of water. Something long and hard is wrapping around me. Me roar in anger and fear as cold, slimy, scaly thing is wrapping body around me again and again. It is squeezing me now, me feel murderous intent from it, me see it, and it is wanting to kill me now._

_Me scared, me not want to die, me scared, me scared and angry and still so, so thirsty._

_Me roars in rage and defiance of this mean cold blood thing and me stretch muscles and the thing makes this screeching hiss like sound. There is a sound of flesh tearing and blood smell is strong in air._

_The thing is in pieces now. It's blood is everywhere and it's heart is slowly not beating. It's body parts are twitching still. The thirst in throat is so strong now, me is being so thirsty. Me is so drawn to blood even though it not smell good._

_Me lean down and grab large fleshy bit and bite into it. Blood pouring down throat is feeling wonderful, not the best but it makes burning go away a bit._

_After me drink enough so me is not being thirsty me is wondering._

_Me thinking, trying to remember but there is fire in head that hurts me so bad me not try anymore to remember it._

_Me try hunting other animals. Me find furry things that are walking on all legs taste much better then cold thing is._

_Me be walking in woods trying to think still, trying to understand. Then me come across scent much more better than before. Me follow scent and me is smelling smoke and something cooking, roasting meat. It smell real nice._

_Me hear two heart beats and strange sounds. Me silently creep behind bushes and see a fire and something dead being roasted over it. There are two creatures like me only one is taller and more...muscle-y?_

_The other is a foot smaller than him and more...thin-y?_

_They both have strange markings on face, red and yellow. They wear these things that barely cover their privates and thin brown straps that keep little extra pieces of cloth around their arms._

_They were making these odd sounds...speaking! They are speaking! Me is knowing what they are saying. They is saying how much fun they had hunting the dead thing they are getting ready to eat. The taller male is saying how proud he is of the smaller._

_I stare in wonder. Their lights are...beautiful. More sharp and bright then the things I have eaten so far._

_Me want to learns more, maybe they is knowing something about me that make sense for me._

_Me walk out of bushes. When bushes rustle they immediately grab these stick things with sharp point things on them. Me amazed by how quick they respond. Me see they are cautious and ready for a fight. Me is thinking they warriors._

_The taller one is asking me who I am. They get good look and they being amazed, they glow with appreciation for how I am looking. But the older one is extra cautious now._

_He asks again who I am being. Me ignore him and go to the fire. Me hungry, not thirsty, stomach likes smells coming from meat. Me grab piece of meat, fire tickles me but does not hurt me. The boy tells me to stop but stops when he sees I am not being hurt by fire. Me take bite of meat and find it good._

_Me smile at them and frown. They is being scared now._

_Me walk forward, holding meat in offering. But then bigger male tells smaller one to run and he throws stick at me. It bounces off and I am being mad now that he attacks me._

_Me snarl and drop meat and pounce on the man. He is being afraid, a little for himself but more for smaller one. Me is not knowing why he fear more for someone else. What so special about small one?_

_The smell coming from big one is intoxicating. I can hear the blood pumping from his heart, it is beating so fast. The idea of drinking his blood makes my mouth burn!_

_I lean down to bite into his neck but something shoves me off him. I get up and see the smaller one standing above the larger. The fear is small now, it is replaced by a color that is part red, part gold. A really beautiful color mixed with soft pink._

_Courage and love my mind tells me._

_Me is not knowing why they are connected so._

_The small one is yelling at me, he is brandishing his stick and a small metal blade thing at me. The large one was afraid now. He yelled at the smaller one to run, that I was the child of a libishomen and I would kill him._

_The young one ignored him, he yelled at me to go away, he said he would not let me hurt his father._

_Me understand then why they so close. They is being father and son. They look alike and smell alike and even taste alike in my head._

_Seeing the son protecting his father sent a wave of longing through my body. Where was my daddy? Why wasn't he with me?_

_Me stood up straight and decided to leave. Me turned my back and left them alone. Me is sense their surprise and the boy's sense of pride and triumph that he drove me away. It made me want to go back and scare them some more but I kept on walking away._

_Me is hearing the youth's shout of triumph and hear the father chastising his son for not running, telling him he could have died. But he told him he was also proud of him for being brave and when they got back to the village he would tell the elders of his bravery and they would sing sons of how he fought the demon child._

_Me feel hurt when me is being called demon child. Me not know exactly what a demon or a libishoman is but daddy would know I bet._

_Me decide then to seek daddy out. Daddy would have the answers, daddy would explain everything, daddy would love Matthew and protect him and we would hunt animals and people together and have fun like the son and father eating the meat._

_Daddy would make everything better._

* * *

 

I choke out a laugh.

Daddy would make everything better?

God what a fool I had been.

I remember everything now. The truth and the lies. I was all the Matthew's that ever existed, for I had every memory, the true ones and the false ones.

I was both new and old. Old for all the knowledge of the past was mine, and new because all the information made me into a whole new being.

I realized now why I was so drawn to Leah. I once thought it was because I was drawn to her loneliness. But it was not just that, I realize that now. Fate can be so cruel. To make her in her image and then to take me from her.

I glared at Joham. He is no longer my father, I have no father. He may have created me but he is not worthy of being my father.

"You bastard!" I growled, "I know the truth now! You used me!"

"Do not speak to me like that boy, I am your father," he growled.

"You are not my father, I have a father and his name is Fred!" I glared at my sisters. "You all knew what he was doing to me, you knew and you never did anything to stop him!"

Rosemary looked uneasy, I could see guilt and shame in her aura. Mia and Sarah refused to look at me, but Seraphina as usual was cold and indifferent to what was going on.

"Well you can all stay here if you want. I am done." I turned and pushed my way through some of the hybrids, heading for the doors that led out of the garden.

"Where are you going Matthew?" Joham called.

"Home, my real home, with a family that actually cares about me," I said.

"You can't walk away from us Matthew, we are your family."

I turned to face them all. As much as it would pain me to depart from the young ones who have done nothing to me, I could not be near Joham, or my sisters. The people who had lied to me and manipulated me for all those years.

"You wouldn't know what a family was if it kicked you in the face. A family is about love, respect, compassion, and understanding. You have warped the idea of a family to serve your own twisted goals and I won't be a part of it. I renounce all ties to you and this coven, don't seek me out, don't contact me in any way, I am done with all of you."

I turned my back and continued to walk away. Away from them, away from this madness, away from the lies. But I had made a serious error.

I thought they would let me go.

A wall of fire erupted in front of me, keeping me from the door. I spun around and growled. Seraphina had her hand held out, using her power to block me from leaving.

A wave of sleep began to wash over me but I predicted this, I lashed out at Hypnia with sleep and she fell to the ground. Brand rushed me while I was focused on Hypnia. Her hands glowed a bright red. I could tell it was not as hot as it had been when she woke me up but it would still immobilize me. The pain in my shoulder was a dull ache now, once I get blood in me it will instantly heal otherwise I will have to wait a whole day for there not to be a mark.

I dodged her blows and brought my fist into her stomach, she grunted and fell to the floor.

Four more came at me and I hit them with a wave of confusion and drunken haze that made them sloppy and drunk like.

Who'd have thought even in drunken haze hybrids can be graceful drunks.

I went to run but something white hot grabbed my foot, I howled in pain and saw Brand had grabbed my foot, her hand deep red. A look of triumph on her face and in her aura.

Before I could retaliate someone grabbed my front and jerked me forward. I looked into the eyes of Peter, Rosemary's son and I knew I was lost.

The world disappeared.

Joham, my sisters, the hybrids, the castle, everything. Instead I was in a very fancy room. The walls were white, covered with all kinds of fancy paintings. I remember a few. There was the Mona Lisa, the last supper, a woman wearing a green dress and carrying a snake skin purse I knew to be Lamia.

There was a crystal chandelier on the room, there was one of those giant harps in the corner and a small mahogany table with fancy silverware.

Had I not been so terrified at what had happened I would give credit to Peter for his attention to detail. He had the power to trap you in a mental cage. A cage where he was the warden/God and you were at the mercy of his imagination.

"No!" No!" I yelled.

I ran to the wall and began to pound as hard as I could. There was not even a crack. I tried to project my power. I tried everything and I held nothing back. But nothing happened.

I fell to my knees and cried. I cursed Peter, I cursed Joham, and I cursed life in general. I cursed myself a fool for not fighting harder, I cursed myself for thinking they would let me leave.

Before I had the option of leaving, now Joham had made a prison for me I could not escape, not unless he let me.

"Leah, save me!" I called.

* * *

Joham P.O.V

Matthew laid on the ground not moving. I walked over to him and used my foot to nudge him on his back. He looked like he was sleeping. But I knew better.

"Well done Peter, Brand," I said, "you all did well."

"What now Joham?" Vladimir asked.

"The she-wolf knows and your son has rebelled, what now?" Stefan asked.

"Now...we continue. Nothing has changed."

"But the Cullen's may go to the Volturi," Vladimir said.

"I know, but whether they come to us or we go to them the outcome will be the same."

"But how Matthew won't help."

"He will, he won't have any choice. Rosemary."

She stepped forward. "Yes father?"

"The time has come for the final cleansing."

"Father?" she asked looking uneasy.

"It must be done, he must never question me again."

She nodded her head. "Yes father."

"Take him to my study," I said to some of the hybrids.

The picked Matthew up and carried him to the study room.

 _You brought this on yourself Matthew_ I thought to myself.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

"Are you out of your fucking mind?" I yelled at Carlisle. "The Volturi? You want to bring those nut jobs in on this after they tried to kill us all?"

"Leah calm down," Jacob said firmly.

"Calm down? Fuck that we can't get them involved, they'll kill us and take Matthew for themselves!"

"Leah, I know that it sounds insane, but the Volturi may be corrupt but they are the foundation of our world. Without them we would have been exposed years ago. If they are destroyed word will quickly spread and all the nomads in the world will run rabid, no longer fearing the wrath or retribution of Aro and his coven," Carlisle said.

"He is right," Alice said, "I am looking into the possible futures where the Volturi are wiped out and the nomads will go into frenzy. Human corpses will rise and our race will have an extreme baby boom once they start fighting for territory."

I rubbed my face with my hand. I did not want to bring those freaks in on this. But Carlisle had a point. As much as I would love to see the fuckers burn the only thing keeping the world from erupting into chaos. With the Volturi gone how long before some dumb vamp went and exposed his whole race?

God what would humans do when they found out vampires were real and they weren't as dark and seductive as common media portrayed them and the usual holy water, sun light and wooden stakes did jack against them.

There would be riots, there would be all kinds of fighting, who knows what the governments would do. It would be true chaos. And once the world starts to over flow with vampires what would that do to us?

We already had a record number of wolves. What would happen when the number of vampires began to rapidly increase?

All those vampires fighting would make what happened in Seattle look like a nice happy day in candy land.

But how can we trust the Volturi, they already proved how greedy and corrupt they are and they have a grudge against us for the little humiliation we gave them three years ago.

Aro loved collecting vampires who were unique and very talented. What would he do when he found out there was a hybrid with a power that could make him and his coven so much stronger?

But what choice did we have?

"Alright, let's do it then," I said.

Fred held my hand, giving me some small comfort. I saw Nahuel smirk out of the corner of my eye. I looked at him and he gave me a look that said _I am happy for you._

I was glad Nahuel wasn't one of those kinds of guys who think just because they slept with a girl they have some kind of claim on her. I am glad he wasn't hurt or jealous of me and Fred. How many guys will do that for a girl?

Carlisle pulled out his cell phone and dialed the number. He put it on speaker so we could all hear it. A voice answered in Italian, I did not know what they were saying.

Carlisle spoke in Italian and there was an exchange of words. Finally the man on the other line spoke and some opera music started playing.

"Did they just put us on hold?" Emmett asked.

"I had to convince the man I knew all about the Volturi."

"They get a new secretary?" Bella asked.

"They always are," Edward said.

We waited for what seemed like an hour. What the hell could these assholes be doing that was taking this long...maybe they are eating. Hope the poor bastard didn't go to get them when they were in the middle of a snack.

Finally a disturbingly familiar cheerful voice came on the phone.

"Carlisle! My old friend, to what do I owe this call?"

God he was obnoxiously cheerful. Seth had more dignity then this prick.

"Hello Aro, sorry for disturbing you but something has come up. You and your coven are in grave danger now," Carlisle said.

Aro was quiet for two moments. "Whatever do you mean Carlisle?"

"Aro. Do you recall Joham?"

"Yes, the one who was under the delusion he was making a super-race, what of him?"

"Aro...he is alive."

Aro laughed. "Carlisle, he is dead, my guard killed him and his spawn."

"I can guarantee you he is alive Aro and he is coming for you and the others. Alice has seen this."

Aro was quit again. "When? How?" he asked more serious.

"We are not sure, in a matter of weeks. He has joined forces with the Romanians and they are breeding with his daughters to make a purer breed of hybrids."

"And how did you learn all this? I know Alice only receives visions when it deals with her own future or she seeks someone else's future."

"Because we were forewarned by Joham's son."

"You mean that Nahuel boy?"

"No, Joham has been very busy. He has another son called Matthew. He is really...talented."

"Talented?" Aro asked. I did not like the tone of curiosity in his voice.

"Like Renessme he is gifted. A very powerful talent."

"Oh what can he do?"

Carlisle looked at me. I sighed and nodded.

"Eleazar calls him a psychic-lens. He can focus and manipulate mental energy. He can see the auras of beings, he cans see the color of their emotions, sense and manipulate them to. He is also capable of magnifying the powers of other vampires."

"Magnifying?" he asked sounding really interested.

"Yes, according to Eleazar he can make a gift stronger by twelve times its normal ability."

Aro took in a deep breath. I had this image of him on the other side of the phone, his eyes wide and full of the infinite possibilities this would mean for him and his ambition.

"I would love to meet this boy."

"Well sadly Joham has him now."

"What do you mean now?"

"Well we met him three years ago. He survived the raid your guard visited upon him and his family. In fact, tell me, did Jane have any incidents while she was down in South America?"

"Jane had a...encounter with a hybrid."

"Matthew is the one who she had an encounter with. When we found him he was feral and had no memory of his past. When Jane attacked him and his sister Matthew's power accidentally activated, making Jane's power so strong it shattered his mind. But he escaped because his power made Jane fear him and she ran off."

"Yes, it took the guard a whole day to find her. She was really terrified."

I smirked. The thought of that bitch getting a fraction of the fear she had been using with her power brought me great pleasure. I saw Bella grinning to and I knew I wasn't the only one who took pleasure out of the idea.

"And now he has returned to his father, I take it he regained his memory?"

"No. Joham found Matthew and took him from...his home."

"What aren't you telling me Carlisle? I know you are holding back on something."

I took a deep breath and spoke. "Matthew was stolen from me," I said.

"And this is?" Aro asked.

"Leah Clearwater. I am one of the guardians of La Push."

"Ah yes, you were the silver furred one."

"Yes, I was taking care of Matthew, we were living in Canada when his sisters came for him. I was unable to protect them and they abducted him. One of Joham's daughters, Seraphina can control fire. Joham is going to use her with Matthew's power focusing her's to burn all of Volterra down."

"The city?"

"Yes, Joham is going to burn the city to get to you Aro. We have no way of finding them, all we know is they are somewhere in Romania and Joham has his daughters and the offspring they have made with Stefan and Vladimir. Aro, I know there is some bad blood between us now. But if Joham wipes you out then the peace and order you have made for our world will be shattered. Joham will be more concerned with making his super race then keeping us a secret from humanity," Carlisle said.

"This is most serious."

"Yes it is. Aro, we would like to help you fight Joham."

"You wish to help us?" Aro said sounding confused.

"We do not agree with Joham's view on humanity. Plus we adopted Matthew, he is a member of our family and we will not allow him to be harmed. In return for helping you we would like you to help us reclaim him."

"Why should I accept the offer Carlisle? Now that I know of the danger my guard is more than capable of dealing with it."

I felt that familiar streak of anger run through me. The one I get when I am dealing with idiots, assholes, or dicks. And Aro was all three.

"Because, Joham has a bunch of hybrids that have power that rival your covens, think of it, Matthew alone could wipe the floor with all you. All he would have to do is make you feel compelled to obey Joham or make you suicidal, hell he could make you all go into a homicidal rage and kill one another, and with Seraphina she could roast you all before you can even raise a hand against them. You need us because we have the information you need, what they can do and you can use it to counterattack them," I said.

Jasper nodded his head in approval of my plane.

"You have a point there Miss. Clearwater," Aro said. "I will talk to Marcus and Caius. When should we expect you?"

"In a few days, first we need to make arrangements," Carlisle said.

"Very well, contact me again when you are coming old friend, I will see you soon." Aro sounded so delighted when he said that. I had to wonder if he was always so cheerful.

The phone went dead as Aro hanged up.

"Well that went better than I expected," Carlisle said.

"We so cannot trust that guy," I said.

"We have no choice we need to work with the Volturi if we are going to rescue Matthew," Fred said.

His face was a little tight when he spoke. The Volturi killed his coven, and Bree. I can only imagine what it must be like for him to have to work with her killers.

"So who is all going to go?" I asked. "Count me in."

"And me," Nahuel said. "I will fight with you to save Matthew."

His aunt stepped forward. "If Nahuel goes then I go."

"I am going," Fred said.

"No you can't!" I said.

Fred looked hurt. "Why not?"

"Fred, they killed your old coven, they could try and kill you as well."

"But I am a super vampire remember? Aro won't want me dead, besides, with my gift it would be easy for us to sneak up on Joham and take Matthew back," he said.

"Aro might try and use your past as a way to get you to join though."

"Aro and his coven can't make me do anything Leah, I can make them sick by the very thought of me and they can never find me."

He tightened his hold on my hand.

"Relax, everything will be fine."

"Well I am going," Emmett said. "If there is going to be a fight, I am there."

"Me to," Rose said.

"Me and Jasper are going," Alice said.

"Me to," Edward said.

"And me," Bella said.

"Bell-"

Bella raised a hand. "I do not want to hear it Edward. My power is the only thing that can protect us from Matthew's gift."

"But who will watch over Nessie?" Edward asked.

"I want to go," Nessie said.

"No!" Edward, Bella and Jake said at the exact same time.

"But Matthew is my friend, I want to help," she said. She had the same look on her face Bella would get when she wanted to help but was being prevented from doing so.

"Renessme you are too young, and it is too dangerous," Edward said.

"But how am I supposed to stay behind knowing you are all going to fight?"

"You must remain here Nessie, you will be safe," Edward said.

"I need to inform Sam of the situation," Jake said.

"I'll go with you," I said.

Fred saw me out, I could still hear Bella and Edward arguing with Nessie.

"Just like her mom," I muttered.

Fred kissed me on the cheek. "Don't worry Leah, we are getting our boy back."

I smiled and ran my hand over his cheek.

Me and Jake sprinted to the woods. Once we were far enough in we phased. We headed for La Push. I had not phased in a few days. It felt good to be back in fur.

" _So you and Fred huh?" Jake asked._

I was able to communicate with Jake but none of the others. It was the same kind of link Jake and Sam had. We could communicate but there was no awkward seeing into one another private memories. Instead of working to hide our minds from one another we had to work to open them to one another.

" _Do we have to talk about this Jake?" I asked._

" _Well since we have time."_

_I sighed. "Look it's...complicated."_

" _I figured that. I know you're not my beta anymore Leah but I am still worried about you. I know I can't talk, but it's a bit risky being with him. I mean what if you kiss him to hard and his teeth nick your lips? They are venomous to us you know."_

" _I know. I have already gone through all the cons and pros of this. To be sure I don't know if I am going through a crush or something serious Jake. I want to say it is something serious or growing to be something serious but then I think about all the complications like the immortality thing. I want to grow old Jake and Fred can't chose to age like us. But I really like him, there is a connection between us...fuck why couldn't we have met when he was human. This would be so much easier then."_

" _I know how you feel."_

" _You do?"_

" _Sure, I have thought about Nessie and her immortality. I don't want to be immortal either. But the idea of making her watch me die hurts and being separated from her hurts."_

" _Why couldn't we have found some nice normal people to fall for?" I asked._

" _I know. If it makes you feel any better I am glad you are moving on. After Sam I never thought you would get over that."_

" _I wouldn't say I am over it. It just doesn't bother me as it once did."_

" _Still it's an improvement. Does he make you happy?"_

" _Yes. I like being around him, it's fun. He's smart, handsome, hard working, patient, calm and collected, always there to keep me together. He's really good for me Jake. If it wasn't for the vampire/She-wolf thing I would say we were perfect."_

" _Well after we get Matthew back you will have plenty of time to figure things out."_

Once we were deep enough in La Push Jake howled. Summoning Sam. A few moments later I heard Sam.

" _Jake? Leah? What is going on?"_

" _Gather some of your pack, we need to have a meeting. It's important."_

We phased back into human and waited. Quill, Seth, and Embry showed up a few moments later.

Embry stood on Jake's right, which was the official beta spot. I took my side on Jake's left. Seth stood next to me and Quil stood next to Embry. It felt odd to not be on Jake's right. But I gave up that spot when I left.

Embry was the best choice. Seth was still young and had enough on his plate to worry about being a beta. Quil was busy with Claire and was too much of a goof ball to know when to take things seriously. Embry was perfect. He was quit, but at the same time assimilated himself into a group real easily, even if he didn't speak. He was more of a listener, taking in the world around him and adjusting to it. He never lost his cool. He was a good choice for a beta.

Soon Sam showed up with Paul, Jared, Collin and Brady. They hadn't changed much in the last two years but they were older now. I could see it in their eyes. After the split and the adding of the newer younger wolves they had to pick up more responsibility.

"Where's the rest of your pack?" Jake asked.

"Home, they have school tomorrow," Sam said.

I was pleased to hear that. Back in my day being a wolf made it extra hard to finish school. You were extra cranky and tired from patrolling. Plus with us having become wolves it made graduating seem pointless. What's the point of finishing school when you had to stay in La Push?

But that was then, now that we had so many wolves it was easy as pie to make schedules that didn't affect our human lives much. I was glad the younger wolves would be able to have a better school life then we did.

"Good news, we have been contacted by Matthew," Jake said with a smile.

"That's great!" Seth said patting me on the back, looking happy.

"Great, let's go grab him," Quil said.

Embry said nothing but he did have a happy smile. As usual he was waiting for Jake to finish before he celebrated.

"Great, freak boy is coming back," Paul said.

"Paul, I am in no mood for sarcasm right now, I swear to the great spirit if you make one more comment about Matthew in a negative I will break your limbs so bad you won't be able to phase for a month," I growled.

For once Paul backed down. I was amazed. He looked a little hurt and confused about something. Sam looked at him like he didn't understand it. Embry was looking between me and Paul like he was seeing something I was missing.

"Judging from Leah's reaction I gather something is wrong?" Sam asked.

"Yes, see Matthew is all the way in Romania, Joham has joined forces with those creepy Romanian Dracula knock off's who are breeding an army of super hybrids with Joham's daughters and Alice had a vision that Joham is going to destroy all of Volterra to kill the Volturi and when they die all the vampires are going to party like it's Halloween and the world is going to go down the shifter. But other than that everything is fine," I said.

Everyone except Jake looked at me like I grew a new head.

"What!" they all shouted. Soon I was bombarded by questions.

"Carlisle has contacted the Volturi and informed them of the situation," Jake said.

"Why?" Sam asked, "They tried to kill us all."

"Yes, but they are the only things keeping the vampires in check. Think of it Sam. Imagine a world where all the vampires didn't fear any consequences for their actions. You remember what it was like in Seattle, imagine that on a global scale. How long before the truth of vampires was revealed? How long before it is spilled over onto La Push?"

I could see the realization his Sam. He was no fool, none of them were. I could see it all in their faces. The shock, the horror. Seattle had just been a fraction of what could happen if what Jake said was true.

"So what are we going to do?" Sam asked.

I spoke next. "The Cullen's, with the exception for Nessie is going to Volterra. We're going to help them fight Joham."

"Leah, you said we, surely you don't mean-"

"I mean I am going with them Sam," I said.

"Leah no! They will kill you! That Caius guy hates werewolves remember?" Jared said.

"I have information they need. Matthew told me all about his family, they need me alive. Besides, we're not werewolves, we're shape-shifters remember?"

"Jake don't let her do this!" Sam said to Jake.

"Leah is no longer a member of my pack Sam, as much as I worry for her she has proven herself capable of facing the most severe circumstances." Jake smiled then. "Besides, I am going to."

"What?" me and Sam said at the same time.

"Jake you can't you're the last descendant of Ephraim, you are the destined chief of La Push!" Sam said.

"As much as I hate myself for saying this, he's right Jake. You're supposed to lead the tribe when Billy dies, you need to stay here and take care of the tribe," I said.

"Leah, the Cullen's are our allies. And they are my family now. Bella is still my best friend, I won't let her and the others do this alone. Besides, La Push doesn't need me, it is already well protected. And if I die then I am sure something can be arranged with...Paul and Rebecca." his jaw tightened and he grit his teeth.

Paul got this look on his face that was half a smirk, half nervous.

"What is going on?" I asked.

"Didn't you hear, Paul knocked Rachel up," Quil said.

"Watch it!" Jake snarled at him.

"You're going to be a daddy?" I asked Paul amazed.

I figured it was going to happen sooner or later, what with the imprint in all. But Rachel had always talked about being financially secure and married before she started having kids. What happened?

"Yeah, we were surprised too. Guess condoms aren't designed for wolf dicks," Paul said.

Jake bit back a growl.

"Well, I hope everything works out Paul," I said.

"Yeah I am sure you do, seeing how I am leeching off the blacks," he said bitterly.

I remembered the fight we had. The day when mom had that surprise welcome home party for me and me and Paul got into it. I had asked him if he was still leeching off the Blacks. Before I had felt good picking at him because at the time he was being a dick. Now I realized my jab may have been too much. Did he know even then he was going to be a daddy?

It was going to be tough for Paul and Rachel. But especially Paul. He didn't have a job. The only ones that did were Quil and Sam. Times were tough now in the country and La Push wasn't rolling with jobs. Neither was Forks, Seattle was the best bet but the amount of time it would take for him to drive and seeing how gas prices were up.

Shit. Paul was about to have it rough, plus he was a real prideful kind of guy. I can only imagine how tough it was going to be for him to not give his imprint and kid the kind of life he wanted to give them. Paul had a tough family situation. Dad was a drunk and not the funny kind. Not to mention he was lazy, he must feel like he is a chip off the old block or something.

"I am sorry Paul, if I had known I wouldn't have said anything. I know how tough it can be raising a kid. But I think you will be a good dad," I said honestly.

"Thanks Leah," he said with a smile that let me know he really did believe in my sincerity.

"Well if Jake is going I am going too," Embry said.

"Not you too, who is going to look after the pack?" I asked.

"Two wolves don't make a pack Leah," Quil said. "Besides, if my best friends are going then so am I."

"What about Claire?"

His face fell a little. "Claire will be safe here and I will miss her but last time I wasn't able to help Jake because of my imprint with Claire. But I have grown up, I have learned to be away from her longer. Besides if the Volturi die and the leech's go crazy the world won't be safe for her."

I was growing frustrated with these idiots.

"Embry what about your mom? No way she will let you go to Italy," I said.

"What my mom doesn't know won't hurt her. Besides, Jake is my friend and my alpha, I won't leave him."

"Well, when are we going?" Seth asked.

"Seth no!" I said.

"Leah don't even try," he said.

"To hell with that you are staying here!"

"You can't tell me what to do Leah, you're not my beta anymore," he said defiantly.

"No but I am your sister and I can boss you around as much as I want!" I yelled.

We were facing one another now. Yelling at one another like we did when we were kids.

"I am a grown man Leah, I have faced my share of danger."

"Seth, what about mom? What would she do if something happened to the both of us?"

"I am a grown man Leah, mom knows it and it is time you recognized that."

If I was in wolf form the fur on my hackles would be raised. As much as I loved him I wanted to smack the shit out of him right now. Instead I turned to Jake who already had his hands held up.

"Seth is right Leah, he can make his own choices."

I screamed in anger. "God damn it! This has nothing to do with you guys!"

Seth grabbed my arm and whirled me around. His face was angrier and harder then I had ever seen it. He reminded me so much of dad when he was getting stern with us when we were being bad or needed a good chastising.

"Damn it Leah don't you get it! This isn't just about you, it's about Matthew. He is our family to you know."

I blinked in surprise. "What?"

"Leah, you have practically adopted him, you were going to give him the last name of Clearwater. That makes him a member of our family too. That makes him my nephew and puts him under our packs protection."

"Seth..."

"He's right Leah," Jake said.

"Yeah, he may be a crazy little freak, but we have seen the change he has brought in you. He's made you into a stronger better woman, how can we not want to protect him for that?" Quil said.

"You guys."

I was feeling so touched right now. I had thought they were going to look after me, now here I find out they were going for Matthew to. The thought they considered him family meant so much to me. Fuck I will not cry right now.

"Yeah, he has changed you Leah...though I wonder," Embry said.

"What?" I asked him.

"Leah...give me an order."

"What?"

"Give me an order. Any order," he said.

"But I am not your beta anymore."

"Just humor me," he said.

"Fine...um...jump up and down," I said.

"Mean it Leah, please," he requested.

"Okay, I want you to jump up and down!" I said more firmly and put more will into it.

Embry's fists clenched and he looked like he was having a hard time deciding something. "I can't believe it," Jake said.

"What?" I asked.

"It can't be," Sam said.

"What?" I asked again.

"So that's why I felt compelled to obey her," Paul said.

I was getting pissed. Obviously everyone were figuring something out and I was not liking not knowing what it was.

"Will someone tell me what the hell you are all talking about?" I demanded.

"Leah...you're an alpha now," Jake said with a smile.

I froze.

"What?"

"It's true, I noticed it when we talked Leah," Sam said. "I thought it was just my imagination, but I thought I felt the will of another alpha grinding over mine. It's not as strong as Jake's but still it was there."

"But that's not possible, I am a girl," I said.

"Leah, in wolf packs there is an alpha male and an alpha female. You have obviously become an alpha yourself," Embry said.

"But...but how? I told you guys off and told you to do all kinds of shit before and you never felt a desire to do what I said."

"Well think about it. Why is it that even though Jake is the true alpha we still had to listen to him? I think in order to be an alpha you have to be off a certain character. Sam was willing to accept the responsibility and was a dominant person."

"Tell em about it," I said remembering how _dominant_ he had been in bed.

"Leah, normal wolf packs are all about dominance, the strongest and most dominant are the alphas. The weakest and least dominant is the omega. I think before you had the power, but you lacked the drive because you were so broken over your father and Sam. But once you met Matthew he helped heal you. Just as Jake's love for Bella helped him gain the dominance and confidence he needed to break away from Sam and take his alpha role, so too did your love for Matthew allow you to break off from our pack and become your own alpha. You were already dominant, we can all attest to that." Embry smiled and the guys snickered. "But you were so full of anger and sorrow you were not in the right mindset to be a leader, but mother hood has awakened that side of you."

"So what like Jake I could start my own pack?"

"Sure. See your not the destined like Jake so we don't feel your alpha voice as strong as his. You're at the same level as Sam so you could start your own pack and they would have to obey you like how we must obey Jake or they Sam."

"You have gotten bigger Leah," Jake said.

"I have?" I asked.

"I noticed it when we were running together. You seemed to have grown, not as big as me or Sam, but I think since you're a girl you'll always be smaller than us."

"Great, so I am an alpha werewolf now. How is that going to help me get Matthew back?"

"Well unless you can find a bunch of wolves willing to follow you, not much."

A part of me was feeling oddly pleased that I was an alpha. I had always craved independence and freedom. Being an alpha gave me that. But on the other side I was frustrated that my new alpha status couldn't help me get Matthew back.

"So you are all going to go?" Sam asked not looking happy.

"You know I am," I said.

"I am," Seth said firmly.

"Me too," Said Embry.

"Of course me," Quil said with a goofy smile.

"Hey, I can't let this alpha wolf take my pack from me," Jake said nudging my shoulder.

"Then I am sorry...but neither I nor any of my pack will help you."

"I am not going to ask a bunch of kids help me Sam," I snarled.

"You know what I meant," he said.

"You need to stay here, if something happens to us then someone needs to protect the tribe, Paul has a kid on the way, and I have to reason to ask Jared, Brady or Collin," I said.

"I'd like to help, but Kim would worry and I can't risk leaving her alone," Jared said.

"We'd like to help to Leah, but our parents wouldn't let us go all the way to Italy," Collin said.

"Yeah, my mom still freaks when I have to patrol," Brady said.

"Thanks guys, I am happy to know you care. I wouldn't ask something like this of you. Well I am not asking any of you, but I am glad you are saying no. I don't want any of you to get hurt," I said.

"We have to talk to the elders about this Jake," Sam said.

"I know. We should do it now," Jake said.

"We'll go get mom," Seth said.

"I'll tell my father," Jake said.

"I'll get grandpa," Quil said.

We all broke and headed for different destinations. Me and Seth phased and ran for home. I wonder what mom is going to do when we tell her? I hope she can convince Seth to stay.

I don't trust the Volturi. But yet I am still going to fight side by side with them. How do I know they won't try to kill us when we defeat Joham? I don't that's the problem. I can't save Jake and the others, their lives are their own. But maybe mom can do me a favor and get Seth to stay behind.

I could not forgive myself if he died because of me.

As we ran home I thought of Matthew. I hoped to god he was okay. I know it was Joham who pulled him out of the dream. That hand like blister that appeared on Matthew's body had to be him trying to stop him from talking to me. I hope he is okay.

_Hold on Matthew, I am coming._

* * *

 

Joham P.O.V

Matthew laid on the couch. He was so still and peaceful it was like he was asleep. I observed him. Every small part of him. Burning him into my memories because after today...he will be dead.

My stomach hurt, and I confess a small part of my heart urged me not to do this. But I had long learned to push aside feelings like that. I made a promise nothing would stop me, and I meant it.

"Are you sure about this?" Stefan asked.

"Yes. It must be done," I said.

"I have to admit, you are a bigger cold hearted bastard then I thought, I could never do what you are about to do," Vladimir said.

"Then let's be thankful for that." I turned to Peter who stood next to Rosemary. "Take me in. I must have words with him before we continue."

Peter nodded and placed two fingers on Matthew's head. I walked forward and raised his free hand and placed his fingers on my head like Matthew's and then I was in Matthew's prison.

Matthew P.O.V

It had been over an hour and I was wild with fear, anger and other emotions.

I had continued in vain to try and escape. But neither my strength nor my power could help me. Peter's mental prison was impenetrable.

I was pounding on the wall again screaming in frustration when a voice sounded from behind me.

"That is utterly pointless you know."

I turned and Saw Joham and Peter standing in front of me. Something was off about Joham's aura. It was tinged with emotions like regret, a small level of doubt, but outshined by conviction and cold steely resolve.

"Joham!"

"I believe you mean father," he said sternly.

"You are NOT my father," I growled.

He sighed. "Peter."

Peter waved his hand and we were no longer in the white room. Now we were in a long seemingly endless white hallway. Paintings big and small covered the walls. The images...the images were of things I had seen. Frozen in a little frame. Pictures of my memories adorned the wall.

"Go, I will call when it is time," Joham said.

Peter nodded and vanished in a flash.

"Walk with me Matthew," Joham said.

He turned and began to walk down the hall. He looked at all the pictures that were hanging up, viewing each with a quit but deeply inquisitive look.

I followed him, what else could I do?

"Where are we? What is this?" I asked.

"This is...a manifestation Peter has made to make our final talk easier."

"Final talk?" I asked a little fearful.

"Do not fear Matthew, I am not going to kill you. At least not in a certain way."

"Stop speaking in riddles and tell me what you are going to do?" I demanded.

"Matthew...why couldn't you have been more like her? She was so eager to believe in me."

"You mean my mother? Adora? The woman you murdered?" I said harshly.

"Yes, Adora. I did not like having to let her die Matthew."

Truth brightened his aura.

"If you didn't enjoy doing it then why do it?" I asked.

"Because if she learned the truth she would turn on me. I could not let her humanity corrupt you."

"Did you ever love her?" I asked. "What am I saying of course you didn't, she was just another incubator for you to use."

He looked at me sharply. "You have no idea what I felt for her boy. She was different, I protected her and watched her grow since she was a child."

"Why? Why her? Why my mother!" I demanded.

"Because, it was what I created her for."

"What?"

"Years ago, when I was young, I met a vampire who had spent time with the Volturi. He told me they gave him access to their vast library. While he was there he found some research notes by a former member called Eleazar."

I remember Eleazar, he was the nice man with the eyes that could see deep into you. The one from the Denali coven.

"Eleazar as you may not know was once a member of the Volturi. Aro used him to find humans who showed strong gifts and bring them to him to turn to add to his collection. He also used him to pick vampires from a coven who he thought would benefit the Volturi. During his time working for Aro he realized that the majority of our kind who were gifted and had a relative that was a vampire to also possessed a talent as well."

"Like sharing the same skin or eyes?" I asked.

"Sort of. Eleazar left before he could finish his notes but I was curious. Humanity was just starting to learn about the science of biology. It was the work of Eleazar and the works of Charles Darwin that inspired me to try and prove this theory. But it was the legends of the Dhampires that put me on this path."

"Dhampires?" I asked.

"An old European legend of vampires mating with humans and creating offspring from the union. At first I thought it impossible, but then I figured it was worth a try. I know not who it was that sired the first of your kind Matthew, but obviously I am not the first to try this. Although I doubt they had my dreams or ambitions."

"You mean madness."

"In another's point of view I am sure. My first daughter was not powered, but when I had my second child she was gifted. So I decided to manipulate certain bloodlines to help me in my endeavor."

"But how could you know what bloodlines to manipulate?" I asked.

"It was not easy. I did not have a gift like Eleazar's, but there is a trick to finding out which human is gifted."

"How?"

"It's in the blood. See humans with gifts have stronger blood then humans that don't. The more potent the power, the stronger the blood. Of course this phenomenon is not related to the sirens. Those humans with blood that call to a specific vampire. So I found humans with the best smelling blood and did everything within my power to make sure they bred with the right people."

He threw his arms up in the air. "Can you imagine how arduous it was to find these people and manipulate them to procreate? To keep track of dozens of individuals all around the world? But I was determined Matthew. Then I had to wait for the children to grow so they could breed. I had to wait until they finally had children with blood so powerful I could finally attempt it?"

I said nothing, letting him go on.

"My work was hindered even more by that mad German and his insane war. I lost so many of my test subjects to that bloody war. But I was able to save a few samples. I was smart to have them spread all over the world. Seraphina's mother was a Jew I saved from one of Adolf's camps. I birthed Seraphina from her, one of my finest works, along with you."

Pride colored his aura.

"But your mother, I knew she was more special than the others. Her blood was so tempting. I thought she was my own singer. But many other vampires were drawn to her as well."

We stopped by a picture. It was of my mother Adora. It was after Joham pulled me from her body. She looked so peaceful and calm, not knowing what was about to happen.

"She drew them in, her scent was so powerful, and she already showed some talent. Sadly it made her life difficult. She was to good at sensing emotions and knowing how people felt. It even made her own mother and father leery of her. I put so much time and effort into protecting her I admit I grew more attached to her then I did the others."

We stood there looking at my mother's image.

"What about me? Did you ever love me?" I asked.

He looked at me, and I saw sorrow and regret in both his eyes and aura.

"Yes I love you Matthew. Not just because of your talent, you are my son and I love all my children. But the world needs to change, and great change like this does not come without determination, hard work and sacrifice."

It made this worse that I knew he was being truthful. I could see it in his aura. He did love me, but he loved his dream of making a super race better.

"But I think that I will be unable to forgive myself for what I am about to do."

"Joham?" I asked.

"I am sorry Matthew, I wish this could be a simple memory alteration like before. But time and time again you always wind up questioning me, defying me, no matter how many of your memories we alter or erase we always come back to the point where we must do it again. And my planes have reached the crux and I cannot risk all these centuries of work."

He grabbed me by the shoulders and shook me, his eyes were wild.

"Don't you see? I have gone too far down this path! If I fail now all that work, all those women I killed will have died in vain!"

I have never seen him like this before, he looked like a mad man.

"Joham what are you going to do to me?" I asked.

He let me go and regained some of his composure.

"I am sorry Matthew, this time Rosemary is going to erase your mind completely. All this," he gestured to the hallway full of pictures. "Will be blank. I suppose you could call it a form of death. You will be like the living dead, a living zombie. You will have no thoughts, no memories or feelings at all. You will be like a machine, cold and heartless, only existing to serve me and my goals."

I stared at him in horror. "No, please, Joham don't!" I begged.

"I am sorry Matthew. I wish...I wish this didn't have to happen, just know that I do love you and I promise we will all look after you, you will be honored above all my children and you will be the messiah to thousands, to millions. This I promise. Good bye Matthew, I will not dare ask for your forgiveness. Peter!"

Joham disappeared.

"No, Joham! Please! Daddy!" I cried.

Tears fell down my cheeks.

"Please don't kill me."

* * *

Joham P.O.V

My eyes burned, a sign I would be crying if I were still human. I leaned down and wiped the tears that were falling from his closed lids. I kissed him on the head.

"Good bye, my son."

I stood up and turned to Rosemary. "Do it."

She stepped forward and placed her hands on Matthew's head. "Forgive me brother," she whispered.

Matthew P.O.V

I tried calling for Joham but there was no one there.

Then from down the hallway a white light began to shine. I looked at it like a deer looks at the headlights before it is struck. I sensed nothing from that light, true oblivion. It began to shine brighter as it got closer, as it touched the photos they were erased and turned blank.

I could feel them being wiped from my mind, with each photo that was erased so too did I lose a piece to myself. I knew what that light was, it was death, my death. A death worse than death of the body, for this was death of the mind and soul.

I ran. I ran as fast as I could and I did my best to not forget. The hallway seemed endless, I passed thousands and thousands of photos and images, each one a memory. I saw them as I passed. Images of me playing with my sisters, images of me drinking blood, a photo from my first kill, the day I woke up alone and my battle with the Anaconda, finding the tribesman and his son in the forests, images from when I wondered alone for months, meeting Charlie at the dinner, meeting Carlisle at the hospital, meeting the Cullen's and this was when it really began to hurt.

For we were starting to enter my most treasure memories.

All the times I played with Nessie, all the times Rose and Esme groomed and fawned over me. Emmett wrestling with me, Jasper and Edward helping to teach me to hunt mountain lions and deer. Bella reading stories to me and Nessie.

Running in the woods with the Cullen's, hunting deer and bears and mountain lions. Laughing at Emmett as I used my power to make him run from the bears in fear as the rest of us laughed. Running from Emmett when he realized what I had done.

Rose brushing my hair, kissing me on the cheeks and fawning over me. Alice dressing me in new cloth's chasing me around the house. I hated wearing clothes. I liked to wear nothing but shorts. Clothes were to constraining, I needed to feel the wind on my chest. I hated it when Alice got the urge to dress me up so I ran. She could never catch me, her inability to see me made it difficult to catch me.

Esme cooking me a delicious supper. Human food was yucky, but Esme made good food. I would even help her bake cookies. That was fun. She would hum as she worked, it was pretty. She would hug me and kiss me and I would feel so warm. Esme had such a beautiful aura. So full of love, love for me, love for her family, love for the whole world.

Jasper helping me learn to control my power. Jasper and I were both teacher and student. I helped show him new emotions to manipulate. He showed me how to focus my gift, to channel emotions better. People thought Jasper ran cold, but they are wrong. Jasper isn't cold. He is calm, he is focused, and he is very practical. He really loved Alice, he really loved the family. Jasper was just very composed is all, some people confuse that for being cold. But as a warrior he was cold. I sensed that dark part of him. Of all the Cullen's Jasper was closer to his violent side. I both respected him and feared him for that

Edward trying to teach me how to speak right. I could sense the defeat and frustration. He even pinched the bridge of his nose. We had more fun on the piano. I liked the piano. It made beautiful sounds. Some nights the whole family would break out instruments. Violins, guitars, drum sets, all kinds of things. Alice was the best singer in the family. Sometimes the wolves would come over and they would add their voices to the music, sharing their ancient songs. I always thought Leah had the best voice of the wolves.

I told her she sounded like an angel, she would blush and tell me to shut up. But I could see in her aura she liked my compliment.

Carlisle in his study, showing me all the painting he gathered over the year, all the books with pictures. Carlisle had a bright aura like Esme too. Full of pale yellow. Peace, calm, compassion. I liked being around Carlisle, his aura was so soothing. It washed over you like a warm blanket, keeping you warm from the cold. I asked him about God. I asked him about angels and heaven. He told me God has a plane for all of us. I asked him what the plane is, what God's plan is for me, he said I had to find that out myself.

I could never see Bella's power unless she let me, but the effort to take her shield all the way off was more trouble than it was worth. I was always amazed that I could never sense or see her emotions. Jasper said his power worked on her because his power does not work on mental energy like mine. His power affected the chemicals the brain makes. Bella was like Edward. Calm, composed. She loved Edward and Nessie a lot. There were times I saw her holding Nessie and I would feel envy. I was glad they could not see my emotions. I did not want them to see the jade green in my aura.

Bella was nice to me. She liked to watch me and Nessie play. Everyone did, but with Bella I noticed she seemed almost relieved by it. I asked her why. She told me she was happy Nessie could grow up with someone like herself. Another hybrid. Someone to help connect with her in a way neither the Vampires or shape-shifters could.

The Cullen's truly loved me, they were more of a family to me then my own kin. But as I ran past these images and they were claimed by the light they faded from my mind, no matter how hard I tried to hold onto them.

I could no longer remember my own mother's face or her name, I could not remember who the Cullen's were or how I met them.

Who are the Cullen's again?

Faces now, yellow eyes, but I had no idea who these people were, why was I feeling so sad when I began to forget their faces.

Soon I passed past images of Leah and like the ones of those...people...whoever they were, she too began to fade from my mind.

The light grew brighter and no matter how far I ran I could not outrun it. I could feel myself slowly fading, slowly turning into nothing.

Images now of when I lived with Leah and Fred. Images of first meeting Fred, Fred returning to us with new golden eyes, Fred teaching me school stuff and having man talks with me and hunting with me. Watching sports and other shows with him on TV.

Fred and me hunting to see who could catch the biggest catch. Fred and me playing hide and seek. Fred teaching my how to stay hidden, how to track with nothing but my sense of smell.

Looking at Fred and thinking I want to be like him when I grow up. Tall, strong, powerful, smart.

Even Nahuel, the brother I never knew bled from my mind. The nervousness I felt when I first met him. The pure delight when I learned I had a big brother. That day at the creek when we all went swimming and I saw dark pink between him and Leah. Thinking how cool it would be if they were together. Even his nice aunt who I sensed was so happy Nahuel and me were together. She loved her nephew and was happy he had another family member to connect with.

Soon I forgot Fred and Nahuel whoever they are. Like I am forgetting so much? Why am I running? What am I running from? What is this light? Why do I feel so hollow and empty now? Am I dying? Is this what death is like, the loss of your will and individuality?

Am I even an individual? Do I even have a will?

Images of Leah so many images of her, so many memories. It was these images that kept me running, that kept me going. Finally I arrived at the end of a hallway where the strongest and most powerful memory/image was.

Leah.

It was the largest photo, I held onto it for dear life. Leah...all I know now. She is so important to me...Leah, don't leave me, I don't want to be alone, not again...Leah?

Leah...

I...

It is so hard to focus now. Why am I running again? Who am I Leah? Leah where are...you...I am so...scared.

I run my fingers over Leah's eyes, she has such pretty brown eyes.

Leah, where is this light coming from, it….so bright...why...why...why can't I remember anything...but you...you...Leah...help...scared now so...scared...me...me not want...die.

"Leah," I whisper.

The light is so bright.

Leah...wha...please...let me...see...her again...Leah, who will...save you from loneliness now? Why...lonely? Leah...where is...this...light...bright.

I...not...know...I...am...wh...am...Leah...scared...Leah

Leah...you fading...leaving me...Leah...no...leave...I...Leah.

So...empty...so...cold.

Am...this...being...death?...death...no...not...Leah...Leah...Leah...Le...ah...ah...Le...wha...is...Leah?

Le...ah...I...lo...ve...u...sa...ve...me...Leah?

…...

Joham P.O.V

Rosemary pulled her hands off his head, tears ran down her face like a river. "It is done,' she whispered.

She fled the room and I did not stop her. Peter followed her, trying his best to console her but I know she cannot ever be consoled. She just killed her brother. The slaying of one's kin, one of the blackest sin's in the world.

A sin, I will carry for the rest of my eternal life.

Leah P.O.V

We had assembled the elders and had just told them everything.

Much to my annoyance mom was not stopping Seth from going. Unlike Billy who was trying his best to convince Jake to not go. I stood next to mom and a smug Seth.

"Leah, don't pout," mom said.

"I am not pouting," I said.

"Yes you are. I know you don't want Seth to go, I don't either, but Seth is his own person now. I can't keep him from going, besides I feel better knowing you will be together to protect each other." she wrapped her arm around my shoulder. "My daughter an alpha wolf, I should not be surprised, we come from a long line of alpha women."

I smiled at her. I was happy she was proud of my new alpha status.

Then it hit me. This horrible, cold feeling wrapped around my stomach. I clutched my gut and grunted in pain.

"Leah?" mom asked concerned.

The pain intensified and I fell to my knees.

"Leah!" Seth said.

Everyone gathered around me. Jake knelled in front of me and grabbed my face in his hands. "Leah what's wrong?"

I could not explain it. This cold dead feeling that had seeped from my belly all the way to my heart. This feeling of...loss. A feeling I only felt once when dad died.

I don't know how I knew it, but I just knew.

"Something has happened...something has happened to Matthew."

 

**Fusedtwilight: Next chapter the Cullen's come up with a very crazy plane. Please review.**

 


	24. Chapter 24

Focused Madness

Chapter 24

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing.**

**Last chapter was a really pulled on the heart strings. Leah continues to sense what has happened and the Cullen's and wolves prepare to form an alliance they never thought they would.**

Leah P.O.V

Mom drove me and Seth home.

The pain was gone but the feeling...this horrible heart wrenching feeling. I don't know why I was feeling this; all I knew was that something bad had happened to Matthew.

I don't know how I knew, or what made me know. Maybe it was some motherly instinct, maybe it was a she-wolf thing. Maybe it had something to do with being an alpha wolf, knowing instinctively when your pack was in trouble.

As soon as we got home I called Fred.

I dialed the Cullen's number and Jasper answered after four rings. "Hello?"

"Jasper, is Fred there?"

"Yes. Is something wrong, Leah?" he asked.

You could tell from my voice something was wrong, you didn't have to be an empath to tell that.

"Just get me Fred please," I begged.

He did not answer. I heard the phone move around and shift. "Hello?" Fred's voice answered.

"Fred?"

"Leah? What's wrong?"

"Fred...it's Matthew, something has happened to him," I whispered.

"What? Did he contact you again?" he asked.

"No, it's just...this feeling." I explained to him what happened at the meeting with the elders.

"Leah, how can you be sure?" he asked.

"I just am Fred. Something deep inside is telling me we have lost him."

My eye began to get blurry with tears.

"Leah, don't say that!" Fred yelled. I was shocked, I have never heard Fred yell in the time I have known him. "We have not lost him do you hear me! He is fine, we are going to get him back!"

"Fred...I'm scared," I whispered.

"Don't be, we will get him back, I swear," Fred said.

"Okay," I said.

Mom took the phone from me. "Seth take her upstairs would you?"

Seth helped me up and led me to my room. I let him lead me like a meek little puppy, so much for being an alpha wolf. I could hear mom talking to Fred but they seemed far away.

Seth opened the door to my room and closed it; he sat me on my bed and sat next to me. I felt so numb, was I in shock? Why was I in shock? Why was I acting like this?

"Leah? Leah?" Seth was shaking me now. "Come on Leah, snap out of it, you're freaking me out."

"Seth, something has happened to him, I just know it."

"Stop saying that, you can't know for sure!"

"But I do, somehow I know. I just know."

Seth hugged me and I cried into his shoulder.

Seth laid me on the bed and covered me with a blanket. He laid down next to me and held me close to his chest. I used to do this for him when he was a kid.

When he was scared of the dark, or when he thought he heard a strange noise or when there was a bad thunderstorm he would come into my room and sleep with me.

He never did it with mom and dad. He was too embarrassed. Said he didn't want to be a mommy's boy or make dad think he was a sissy, but he had no problem sleeping with big sis when he got scared.

Now here we are years later and the roles were reversed. It felt nice to have someone holding me, not in a romantic way, but just for love and comfort. The way a loved one holds you to comfort you and protect you.

When I was little and I got scared I would wake mom and dad up and sleep with them. I would lie between them and they would both wrap their arms around me and I would feel so safe and protected.

I grabbed my pillow and used it to cuddle. It was a poor substitute for Matthew, but I needed something to help keep my hands from shaking. Needed something to bite into, to keep myself from screaming.

* * *

_I was a wolf now and I was running through the woods. It was bright and sunny and beautiful and beams of lights shined from the sky. I could hear the familiar sounds of waves crashing against rocks, could smell the distant ocean._

_I ran out of the forest and found myself at one of the many cliffs. Someone was at the edge of the cliff, he had his hands clasped behind his back and he was humming a tune, I recognized it being a Quileute song._

_His hair was black and his skin was tan, he was a kid. But I knew from that voice and the way his skin glowed softly in the sunlight who it was._

" _Matthew?"_

_I was no longer a wolf, I was a human and I wore a white dress. The wind was blowing sending the skirt bellowing all over the place._

" _Matthew!" I called._

_He ignored me, he continued to look out at the ocean and but I knew he had to hear me. I walked towards him and put my hand on his shoulder._

" _Matthew," I said shaking him gently._

_He continued to ignore me and finally I made him look at me._

_And I screamed._

_His face was gone. There was no mouth, no eyes, no mouth, no lips, no nothing. It was like someone took an eraser and scribbled his face away._

_I fell on my back in horror, he stared at me, though he had no eyes, but I could feel him looking at me. Then the ocean burst into fire, the sky turned black and ash and the smell of burning flesh and bone filled the air. From the fiery ocean she rose, like a angel from hell._

_Seraphina, wreathed in fire rose from the fire that was now the ocean. Her eyes like blue fire, her hair black as night._

" _You did this to him Leah, you turned him into that!"_

_She laughed and it was beautiful and harsh. She fell back into the fire and it caressed her like a lover, never once burning her. I looked at what was left of Matthew, he was still staring at me with that blank face. Slowly he began to back up to the edge of the cliff, realizing what was about to happen I shot forward just in time._

_He fell from the cliff but I was able to grab his arm in time._

" _I got you!" I shouted._

_He looked at me and I tried to hold on, but I was slowly losing my grip. Before I knew it he slipped and I screamed as he plummeted to the fire below. Unlike his sister, the fire burned him._

* * *

 

I woke up screaming.

"Leah!" Seth shouted.

"Seth?"

"It's me Leah, what's wrong?" he asked.

I said nothing. I hugged Seth hard, hugged him nice and tight. Because I had to know _this_ was real, not the dream. I had to know that the fire was just a dream, a result of stress and fear.

It was the only thing keeping me sane.

Jake P.O.V

I had just contacted Carlisle and informed him my pack was coming with him, he was surprised and told me I didn't have to come.

"Matthew is part of my family. Leah despite no longer being in my pack is still my sister, he is her son, he is family, we protect our own," I said.

"Well then could you ask Billy if he could help Charlie keep an eye on Nessie? We contacted Tanya and the others and they wish to help us as well."

"But what about their history with the Volturi?" I asked remembering their mother and sister who were killed by the Volturi.

"As much as Tanya and Kate would love to see them burn they realize Joham is the greater evil and they want to help keep Matthew safe."

"I'll ask dad, I know he won't mind, he likes how she loves to listen to all his stories. He likes seeing the images she has of the heroes and characters from the stories."

"Thank you Jacob, but I must remind you, this is very risky."

"I know. But we don't want a vampire war any more then you."

Dad was still at the meeting, he was talking to Sam, he had tried to convince me to stay. But he saw the determination in my eyes and he wanted Leah to be safe as well.

I walked over to him and Sam. "Dad, could you help Charlie look after Nessie while we are gone?"

"Sure, it's nice to have a kid around who appreciates a good story," he said with a smile.

"We'll keep an eye on her too," Sam said. "I am sorry I can't help you Jake, but someone needs to protect the tribe and-"

"It's okay Sam, I understand," I said. "Someone needs to stay behind and carry on in case this goes bad."

"Jake, I don't think Leah should go. After tonight, you have to see she is to close to this to think right."

"What am I going to do Sam? Order her to stay?"

"Jake, what if they have wiped his mind and he has forgotten Leah? What will happen if she has to face him in battle and she can't strike him but he can fight her because he does not remember her?"

"I have thought of that, I will keep a close eye on her, we all will. I agree she is too attached to this, but there is nothing we can do to stop her. If we just leave her behind she will find her own way there. She has proven capable of living on the run before."

"Jake, Sam has a point. Even if you kill Joham what if the boy has lost his memory again? Plus the Volturi will be gunning for him now. They will turn on you after Joham is gone, the exact second. Men like Aro who crave power will do anything, no matter how vile or heinous to obtain it. And Matthew is exactly the kind of power a man like Aro would want."

"I know. I have considered all of this. If Matthew tries to fight us Bella can keep us protected from his power and I am sure with Fred we can hide him even from Aro."

"But for how long Jake?"

"As long as necessary," I said.

After that I called the Clearwater house to see how Leah was doing. Sue answered. "Jake?"

"Sue? Is Leah okay?"

"No, she is convinced something bad has happened to him, she called Fred up but she was starting to get hysterical so I had Seth take her upstairs to get some sleep."

"She's that bad?"

"Jake she's a nervous wreck, she can't go to Volterra not like this and- Leah? Where are you going?"

"Sue?"

"Leah! Where are you going?" I heard Sue ask.

"Out, I'll be back soon," I heard Leah say.

"Seth go after her, she is in no state to be alone now!"

"Okay!"

"Sue what is going on?" I asked.

"Leah just left the house!"

* * *

Leah P.O.V

I ran through the woods and Seth followed me. I was glad I could not hear his thoughts because I am sure he would be asking me questions right now.

But I had to get out of the house, I had to see someone. Someone I haven't visited in a long time.

Seth didn't try to stop me, he just let me run.

Ten minutes later I stopped running. I looked down the small hill, my heart was beating fast. Seth realized where we were; he walked up to me and whined. I licked his face and I phased back to human and put my clothes on.

Seth did the same. "Leah, what are you doing?" he asked.

"I need to talk to him," I said.

We walked down the hill. Our feet were soon wet from the dew covering the grass. It was easy enough to jump over the metal fence, they just used it to keep out the fox's and rabbits so they wouldn't eat the flowers.

We passed many stones. Each open written with a name, each written with a day of birth and death. Many of our ancestors were buried here; when I and Seth died we would be buried here as well.

I had not been able to attend the funeral, at that moment I was stuck as a freaked out giant wolf. But I did visit once I had learned to turn human. But I had not been here in years, it was too much.

Graveyards are always portrayed as creepy or scary. Well ours isn't, it's rather lovely, as macabre as it sounds. The grass is green and flowers grew along the fence. I took the time to pick a couple.

As we passed older graves, who were so old the names were starting to fade, I laid a single flower on them. Dad used to do it when we came to visit lost friends or family. I asked why he did it when he didn't know these people, he said because no one should be forgotten, not even the dead.

He said even though these people are long dead we must remember once they were alive, that even in death they were still Quileute and deserved to be remembered.

The last flower I saved for dad himself.

"Seth, can you give me some privacy with dad?" I asked.

"Sure, I'll just...take a stroll," he said.

He walked off leaving me and dad alone. I sat down and placed the flower on top of his stone. I kissed it too; the cold rock was cold against my lips.

"Hey dad," I said.

Of course there was no response.

"Sorry it has been a while, I was living in Canada the last two years. Some things have happened; bad things and worse things are going to happen. I feel a lot of guilt right now. See, two years ago Charlie found this wild hybrid called Matthew and brought him to Carlisle to look after. Now this kid is nutty as a fruit cake. I mean first time he sees Seth he tries to eat him, then the little shit has a power that allows him to turn us into humans and he sees me naked and he tells me I should go see a doctor about not having a thing between my legs, can you believe that?

"Then he latches on to me and starts acting like I am his new friend and I try my best to avoid him but somehow I found myself spending more and more time with him. I don't know why, maybe I was just using him to escape my problems or maybe it was his power reacting to his attraction to me, or maybe it was a part of me that desired a child and was drawn to his pain. I don't know, either way before I knew it my fate and his was intertwined.

"Things were going good, then he accidentally bit me when we tried to get his memories back, he flipped out.." I showed dad the scars on my arm. "Hurt like hell, thought I was going to see you soon, but Nahuel saved me...yeah, about Nahuel, I know you wouldn't approve of him because of the vampire factor. But he is a good guy. And I was so alone, I needed some kind of contact, I couldn't ask any of the others, and I couldn't go to a human. I needed to be someone who I didn't have to lie to, someone I didn't have to worry about their being complications with. Don't worry I am not dating him...but then there is Fred.

"That is really complicated. See Matthew as it turns out is drawn to Emily's blood, we were having a friendly game of ball and Emily wanted to be close with me again so she convinced Sam to let her go, I kind of blame myself, maybe if I had been more friendly with her maybe she wouldn't have done this. But in any case she was there and he caught her scent he tried to kill her...you know how it goes, hell have no fury like a wolf who's imprint has been scorned.

"Sam tried to kill Matthew, he had every right I know. But he was just a kid, he couldn't help being a vampire, he was still recovering from drinking human blood, Emily should not have been there. It just seemed wrong to kill him you know. So me and Sam fought and Matthew made Sam turn human to protect me and I wound up hurting him bad.

"We went into hiding, I took it upon myself to protect him, I didn't even tell the Cullen's where I was going, I didn't want them to get in trouble for being associated you know. They helped with money and the getaway car but I did it. It was tough, I missed mom and Seth a lot and they tried to convince me to come back, but I couldn't. I almost killed Sam for this kid; I had to be the one to look after him.

"While we were there we met a vampire called Fred who is a remnant of this coven the Cullens and us killed, he was smart, he ran. Matthew took a liking to him and we told him to go to the Cullen's and they helped turn him into a yellow eyes vamp and he lived with us. Sounds like a movie or TV show huh? Werewolf, vampire and hybrid live in a house together.

"It's funny. I was satisfied with my life, but the last two years with Matthew and Fred...they were so wonderful, it was like I had done the impossible and found a normal human life. I had a job, my own house...even a kid. I missed La Push, I made sure I called mom and Seth and kept in touch with them.

"But all good things come to an end, Matthew's sister showed up, stole him, and torched the house and almost me with it. Fred saved me and we're back now, we know where he is now and what his evil father is planning. But dad...something has happened to Matthew. I can sense it deep inside my soul. I am afraid to find him now, I am afraid to find him, because I know he may not be the same Matthew I knew and loved and I do love him dad.

"Ridiculous as it sounds I do love him. And even though I am afraid of what I might find I must go get him back, every fiber of my being is telling me to get him back, no matter what. I have to see him again dad, I have to be able to hold him in my arms and smell his sweet scent and listen to his beautiful voice and know he is safe and happy. So I am going to the heart of vampire law and culture to face Joham on the battlefield, him, his daughters, the army he has bred and Matthew himself, I must ally myself with my brothers, my allies and some of my most dangerous enemies all for the chance to reclaim him and even if I get him back keeping him will be harder than before, but I know with Fred's help I can do it.

"I wish you could have met him, Fred is the kind of guy you always told me to go for. Strong, smart, polite, educated. Sure he drinks blood, but he has lovely hair and he doesn't talk much...which is good seeing how I talk enough for the both of us. I just wish you were hear daddy. I wish you wear hear so you could give me some advice.

"I guess I just want to hear your voice one last time. I love you daddy, I know you might not approve of some of my choices, I hope you are proud of me for what I have done with what fate has given me. Matthew saved me from all the anger and bitterness that surrounded me, now I have to save him. I love you, dad."

I stood up and I went to find Seth, he wasn't to far away, I was sure he heard some of what I said.

"You okay sis?" he asked me.

"Yeah. Just needed to vent. Ready?"

"Sure, we going home?"

"Yeah. Don't want to freak mom out any more then what we have."

We headed home and I looked back, I felt like dad should be there waving at us, but he was gone, all I had left of his was memories and the lessons he taught me and that was more than enough for me.

Two days later and we were set.

We had to wait for the Denali coven to come, they arrived yesterday. Sam and his pack were here along with the elders and Charlie. He didn't know exactly what was going on, he just knew we had a very important trip to make and it had something to do with Matthew.

He was still on the need to know thing.

The mood was somber. Everyone knew this was going to make the little Volturi incident seem like cake walk. Because we were helping one snake fight another and the chances were high that we would be poisoned no matter what happened.

Jake suggested Carlisle call up the other vampires from before but he said no. Before he was just asking them to witness, he would not outright ask them to fight. Personally I would have felt better with that Zafrina woman on our side.

While everyone was saying goodbye I took Emily far away from the group so we could have some privacy.

"Em, I know we have been through a lot and there is still some bad blood between us, but before we go, I had to do this." I wrapped my arms around her and gave her a hug. She stiffened in surprise but relaxed and hugged me back.

"Oh Leah," she said.

"I didn't want you to think I hated you or something, you know in case I-"

"Don't even say it Leah!" Emily said her face set in stone. "Don't think you can use death to weasel your way out of being my bridesmaid. I expect you to come back alive and well and you're going to bring that kid of yours too, I'll wear a lot of perfume or something so he can't smell my blood, but understand this Leah, you will come back, this isn't goodbye, got it?"

She hugged me again and I hugged her back."Yeah, I got it," I smiled.

We walked back and I saw Sam was watching us with a small smile.

Mom was fussing over Seth, making sure he had everything packed. "Now I packed that guide to Italian so you can learn the language. Also I packed you a map so if you get lost-"

"Mom, I get it, I'll be fine," Seth said.

Mom looked like she was about to cry. She wrapped Seth in a big hug and began to sob. "My boy, my baby, your all grown up now, what am I going to do?"

"Now, now Sue, leave the boy alone," Charlie said gently pulling mom of Seth.

As soon as mom saw me she latched onto me next. "Take care of your brother now Leah. Be careful, don't trust any of those monsters."

"I won't mom," I said hugging her.

"And Seth listen to Leah, she is your sister and an alpha now."

"Yes mom."

Mom beamed at me. "My baby, an alpha. Your father would be so proud of you."

"Leah."

I turned and Sam was there. "Good luck," he said.

Much to his surprise I gave him a hug. If this was to be the last I saw of him, of any of them I wanted them to remember me as happy, tough Leah, not sad, angry Leah.

"Listen, now that you are an alpha now, I was wondering. How would you like a pack of your own?" Sam asked.

"What?" I asked surprised.

"My pack is too big Leah. I spend more time trying to keep them from fighting and killing one another. We get our instincts from wolves Leah, wolf packs aren't supposed to be this big. I figured with you being an alpha now, when you get back you could take some off my hands. I figure since your good with kids maybe you could help me whip them into shape."

"Can we do that? Three wolf packs?"

"We worked with two, why not three?"

"I'll think about it Sam, but thanks for the offer."

"Come back safe Lee."

Nessie was finishing saying goodbye to her parents. She was still upset she couldn't come with. She reminded me of Bella when she was still human, the anger, the frustration at how helpless she was.

We had our hugs, we all said our see you laters, careful not to say goodbye.

We all got into the cars. Us wolves rode with Emmett and Rose in his jeep, it was the only car that could hold us all. Fred rode with Bella and Edward, Nahuel and his aunt drove with Carlisle and Esme and the Denali coven followed.

I wanted to ride with Fred, but I did not want to be around Edward when I was next to Fred and it had been so long since I had been with my pack brothers.

We drove to the airport, the Cullens had bought a private plane to fly us to Italy. Funny, I once dreamed of going there with Sam one day. Now that I know what lives there I dread it.

We didn't pack much save some clothes we would need. When we faced the Volturi we wanted to look a bit better so Alice got us some clothes that wouldn't make us look like we came from a third world country. If I was going to face the most powerful coven in the world it was not going to be in my sweat paints and a tank top.

We got to the airport in record time thanks to how reckless vampires drive. I was glad that the Cullens got one of those big jet planes instead of the cramped ones. I was a wolf and I hated being stuck in cramped areas. Made me nervous.

I sat by the window, watching as the earth passed us by. I kept on wondering if I would come back to Washington this time? I had a lot of things to look forward to, being bridesmaid, being an alpha to a pack of wolves.

But this felt different than any other battle I ever fought. I felt like I was standing in front of an oncoming train and I couldn't move.

"Penny for your thoughts?" a voice asked.

I turned and saw Fred was sitting next to me. "Hey. Nice view huh?" I asked.

"Yeah, it's amazing. I never flew in a plane before," he said looking out the window in wonder.

"You scared about meeting the Volturi?" I asked.

"No. I am confident in my ability."

"But will you be okay being around them? The same people who killed Bree?" I asked.

He took a deep breath in then out. "It will be tough, but this is for Matthew."

I laid my head on his shoulder. "Sam offered me a pack all of my own."

"I heard. You going to do it?"

"I don't know. I mean I am still trying to figure out what to do about Matthew, I haven't even considered his offer."

"So how does it feel to be an alpha?" he asked.

I shrugged. "No different than before. Which is funny, I thought being an alpha you would feel more important or big and bad. But I am still me, still Leah."

My eyelids felt heavy. It was going to be a long trip. Soon my eyes closed and I felt something cold brush my lips lightly.

* * *

Fred P.O.V

She looked so peaceful sleeping right now.

I brushed my thumb gently against her hot lips, remembering the feel of them pressed against my lips.

I still think what happened between us was a dream. Did I really go skinny dipping with her? I have never even gone on a date with a girl before and here I was swimming with one in my birthday suit. We didn't have sex but it was definitely rated R.

Despite our little romp in the creek it was still unsaid what we were. Were we an item? A couple? Boyfriend and girlfriend?

I didn't know. But I do know there was something powerful between us.

I thought of the Volturi. I know everything about them. From the leaders, Marcus, Caius and Aro. How Aro can read minds with a touch, Marcus can see the bonds between people, Caius has no power but he has a sharp mind and a cold logic and is one of the greatest tacticians to ever live. Aro was the head of the three, it was his ambition and will that made the coven the force it was today. Marcus was useful, with his gift, he could spot a traitor a mile away, but he had suffered the loss of a loved one and had been a zombie for centuries now. Caius was the most violent of the three, preferring more draconian methods to matters. Despite not having a gift he earned his place as coven leader for his brilliant mind and his ability to solve any problem.

The wives had no dealings with their husband's dealings, they only came out to feed or spend time with their mates, otherwise they kept to themselves, and until they came to Forks they had not left Volterra in centuries.

The guard was numerous; of all them only two did not have special abilities. Santiago and Felix. From what I understand Aro took these two in because despite their lack of powers they had battle skills that made them capable of fighting groups of vampires and coming out on top.

Santiago was once one of the Spanish conquistadors. Sometime during his run in the jungle he ran into a vampire and was turned. He had claimed a large part of Mexico for himself. When the Volturi showed up to prevent exposure they saw potential in Santiago they had not seen since Felix and had him join.

Felix. He was the one who killed Bree. Felix was once a Spartan warrior, like all children of Sparta, or at least the males life was tough and cruel. Babies who were judged to be weak or diseased were left to die. Those strong enough were harshly trained to be warriors. Felix was the youngest fighter in the Spartan army. But one day he got into an argument with a superior officer and killed him. Before he could be killed he ran, eventually he was captured and bought as a slave in Rome and tossed in the ring as a gladiator.

Life was good for him then. No matter what they sent after him whether it was man or beast fell to to him. His Spartan blood and warrior instincts made him damn near invincible. Then during the time of the war with the Romanians Aro needed some troops so Caius having heard of Felix's reputation made him an offer he couldn't refuse.

Demitri was one of Aro's prized guardsmen. His talent for tracking was unsurpassed; he had never lost a target. Edward said the reason for this was unlike other vampires who catch the scent of smells their target leaves, Dmitri catches the scent our minds leaves behind. I guess our minds leave behind a foot print or echo he can track. It is similar in a way to Edwards telepathy apparently. His power might not work on me though, since I can make someone sick by the very thought of me.

Demitri lived in Pompeii. However as a child he found he had a talent for hunting and spent much of his time out of the city, hunting animals to sell in the city for their meat and fur. It was on such a day when young Dmitri felt the earth shake and saw Mount Vesuvius erupt. He was one of the only survivors of that lost city.

Dmitri lived in the wilds for years, hunting animals and selling their hides at cities and towns to make ends meats. But one day he was captured by slavers and like Felix was sent into the arena. Years hunting animals helped him though. Dmitri proved himself a capable warrior. But soon he met his match one day in a free for all. When it came time for the thumbs up or down Aro who saw potential in Demitri whispered into the Roman ruler's ear and Demitri got a new life he never expected.

Of course there was the witch twins Alec and Jane. Alec who could strip you of all your senses and Jane who with a single look could bring you to your knees with pain. Thinking of Jane made anger rage through me. It may have been Felix who killed Bree, but it was Jane who ordered it, Jane could have spared her but she decided to be sadistic and petty. They were the Volturi's strongest members. Their gifts allowed them to take on vampires stronger and bigger than them.

Then there were other members like Corin, Afton, Chelsea, Heidi and many more. They were the strongest, the oldest, and the best. But they were far from perfect. They were corrupt and instead of killing when the law was broken they killed when they wanted something, namely vampires with special gifts and they didn't care who they had to kill to get it.

This was proven when they came to Forks three years ago. They had been told the Cullens had made an immortal child, but instead it had been Nessie. They should have left when they learned the truth. Instead they tried to make some new excuse for Nessie to die. It was all lie's Aro was using to try and get Edward and others to join him.

But they did not count on the Cullen's having so many friends and allies and they did not count on Bella's power protecting them all. Rendering the Volturi's powers impotent for the first time ever. A part of me wishes I had been there but then they would have used my existence as an excuse to fight.

It matters not now; we are going to Italy, this time to save them. Irony. Yet we knew despite our good intentions there was still a good chance they could turn on us.

But if we did nothing then Joham would destroy them leaving the world open for unruly vampires. Plus it was the only way to save Matthew.

"Hello Fred."

"Nahuel," I said politely.

Nahuel sat down next to me. "How is she?" he asked referring to Leah.

"Worried for Matthew. You heard right?"

"About her...premonition?"

"Yes."

"Yes, I heard." sadness filled his eyes. "I do not doubt it, her and Matthew have a powerful bond. I, too, fear something has happened to him."

"It can't be too bad, Joham wouldn't harm his own kid right?"

"Maybe not physically. But my father has no sense of empathy or compassion. Once he sets his mind on something he will see it threw no matter how horrid or inhuman. To him the end justifies the means. If sacrificing the lives of innocent women is fine I don't see why a single hybrid would matter, even if it is his own son."

When he spoke of Joham it was with complete disgust and loathing.

"I owe you an apology,y Nahuel. I failed to protect Leah and Matthew."

"You owe me nothing Fred. I owe you. You had the strength to do what I did not."

"What is that?"

"You staid with her. That day she left she asked me to come but I said no."

"She told me that. May I ask why?"

"My aunt and I live in the mountains; we have lived in the wild on humans for years. I feared we would not be much help to Leah. You lived on humans for little over a year; imagine the effort you would have to put into it if it had been a hundred and fifty years."

"I can't, I still have some difficulty," I said.

"Exactly. Leah would have a tough enough time with Matthew, but with me and my aunt we would be a greater hindrance then a help. I am grateful you had the power and will to do what I had not. I knew Matthew was dangerous, even for Leah, he already proved that, but me and my aunt could not just adapt to the Cullen way of life or to the modern world. Two years you helped give them peace and happiness. I owe you much Fred."

"Nahuel...I know you care a lot for Leah and-"

"I know about you and her Fred."

"You do?" I asked surprised.

He smiled. "I am not blind. I have a special place for her in my heart. But what we had was all about lust, not love. I admit I would not be oppressed to the idea of a more lasting relationship with her, but her heart is in your hands now my friend. And I am sure it is well safe there."

"I don't know about that. I can't give her what she wants. She wants to age, I can't she wants to die but I don't want her to die, she wants to stay live the normal life but there is only so much of that I can give her. I curse this state I find myself in. The only good thing about my nature is I can use it to protect her and Matthew, but I can not use it to be with her. I wish I was a shape-shifter so that way we could truly be together. But I am a vampire, I will live until I am torn apart and the pieces burned, but she wants to age, to wrinkle, to fade, to die. It is ironic that men have sacrificed much to achieve immortality and hear I am wishing I could trade it all."

"I know how you feel, Leah already told me of her wish to live and die like a human. It is not easy to live with the idea the one you love wants a life you can not give her. I wish I could give you some advice to help you. But I to can not give her what she wants, immortality was born to me. I can no more give her that life then you can."

"I picked one hell of a woman to fall in love with. I wish I was still human. Then we could be together so easily."

"But you would not have met her and Matthew, you would not be able to travel with her to Volterra to help save him," Nahuel pointed out.

"I know. All we can do is try our best to get my brother back and protect them. But I hope life can make it work out. I see pain in your eyes Fred. You and her both deserve happiness."

"Thank you Nahuel, I am glad we can be friends, despite our affections for Leah."

"I never did understand why humans get so angry with one another when they love the same person. Seems stupid to fight when you share love for the same person."

"Humans huh?" I said.

"Yeah, silly things," he smiled.

The flight continued on. Leah woke up a few hours later and asked if she missed anything. We smiled and told her no. We had our man talk and there was no need to tell her what was said.

We all went over planes and strategies again and again. We were swimming into dangerous waters.

As we drew closer to Italy my thoughts turned to Matthew. I wondered if he was okay, what he was doing, if he was thinking about us. And I sincerely hoped Leah's feeling was not an omen, but just a bad feeling and nothing more.

Matthew was like a little brother to me, and like a son in some ways. If anything happened to him I dare say his loss would be worse than Bree's.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

It was day when we arrived at the airport.

I was glad to be off that damned plane. It was good to feel sunlight against my skin, to feel the wind blow through my hair.

The vampires had to dress in full body clothing so they wouldn't sparkle when the sun touched them. We went to baggage claim to grab our bags. The vampires got a lot of odd looks. Partially because of how they dressed and partially because they were so stunning. The men wore hoodies and the women had scarves wrapped around their heads to block out the sun. But they still looked amazing.

It was to our immense surprise we found a limo and a driver waiting for us. An older man with a sign that read Cullen in thick black letters.

"For us?" I asked Carlisle.

"Aro arranged transportation," he said.

"How nice of him," I said, my voice thick with sarcasm.

We loaded our bags in the trunk and got into the limo. Once we were already we were on our way.

I was amazed we were all able to fit in the limo. Five werewolves and fourteen werewolves. All in one limo. I have never been in a limo before, I don't know if I was supposed to feel special or not. I felt like I should be riding in a Hurst.

"So what is the game plan?" Emmett asked.

"Yes, I know we have gone over it on the plane dozens of times but I think we should prepare again," Garrett said.

"Alice, what is going on with Aro?" Carlisle asked.

"He is eagerly waiting our arrival," she said. "He has already gone over everything with Marcus and Caius. Caius thinks we are lying and planning something. He wants to kill us as soon as we arrive. But Marcus and Aro are more sensible. They want to hear what we have to say. He is really interested in Matthew. He has already thought of thousands of ways Matthew could be useful to him."

"Not to be a downer or anything, but if we do get him back what do we do?" Kate asked. "I mean now that Aro knows of him he will want him bad right? How are we going to keep Aro from getting his hands on him?"

"Fred and I can keep him safe. As long as Fred keeps his power around us we can't be found," I said.

"Aro won't stop Leah," Eleazar said. "Once he learns what Matthew is capable of he will not stop until Matthew is his. He is the ultimate desirable. Any vampire would want him in their coven."

"Well too bad, Aro won't get him, _ever_ ," I said stressing the last part.

"But how do we know Aro won't just kill us after he gets what he needs from us?" Rose asked.

"She's right, once he reads our minds and learns everything he needs why keep us alive?" Jasper asked.

"Greed. Aro wants Alice, Edward, Bella and I know he would want Fred on his side," Jake said.

"Plus he will not kill us," Carlisle said. "Despite what happened years ago Aro will not seek to hurt us. Especially not now that we are trying to help him."

"What about the rest of the guard?" Edward asked. "Aro might be more forgiving but the others will surely not be as forgiving."

"If Aro orders no hostilities then they will obey, no one would dare attack us if Aro ordered it."

"Carlisle, you forget, we are giving Aro a reason to attack us," I said.

"Leah," Fred said warningly.

"Actually Aro may show Fred mercy," Edward said, "you forget Fred is quite talented and technically he did not break any rules, his other coven mates did. Jane only killed Bree to assert her authority over us. Once Aro reads Fred's mind I am certain he will be given absolution."

Fred grinned at me and I wanted to punch him. I was so worried they would try and harm Fred for his past, power or no power.

Soon the limo pulled into a building. The door closed behind us and when it shut it sounded like the doors of a mausoleum closing.

We were expected. Three figures decked in black were waiting for us. I recognized them from the battle. They were some of the guards. We got out and faced the three.

"Carlisle," the girl said politely.

"Chelsea," Carlisle said back.

"We have been sent to escort you to the main hall," she said.

"We have packed baggage," Carlisle said.

"It will be taken to the rooms Aro has set up for you," she said.

That made me feel a little more comfortable. If Aro had rooms ready then he wasn't going to kill us...right away at least.

We followed Chelsea and the other two guards. They led us to a door and we found ourselves in a long narrow hallway.

"The building has grown since I was last here. Tell me, do you still use the underground tunnels?" Carlisle asked.

"Yes, we don't use them as much as we once did. But the main building is connected to a few of the newer buildings now," Chelsea said.

I had no idea what they meant and Edward had to hear my inner questions and answer. "In the old days the Volturi used the sewer system to travel during the day. But not they have built passages that lead to some of the near by buildings."

"The tunnels are spread far and deep, its very maze like and you can get lost really easily," Eleazar said.

"If you have time you should visit them. They are fun to traverse if you like puzzles," Chelsea said.

Yeah, like I would waltz through the labyrinth of the damned. I was amazed at how nich she was being to us, seeing how some years ago she tried to kill us all.

No more questions were asked as we headed for the main room. We took a lot of stairs and walked through a lot of hallways. I figured we were getting close. Soon the concrete and wooden walls turned to stone. The air smelled older, more ancient and the smell of vampires flooded my senses.

I tensed.

It was instinct, so close to so many vampires, many of whom I knew would love to snap my neck like a twig. I knew it was affecting the others as well. I saw the guys faces. Tense, aggravated, angry, ready for a fight.

A wave of calm hit us like a cool breeze on a hit summer day, Jasper and his power. The guys relaxed a little, their faces lost some of the hostility.

I had to appreciate the decor of the building we were now in. I felt like I had stepped out of time and into the renaissance or something.

Soon we came to a large double set of wooden doors. Chelsea opened them and we walked into a grand, vast room. The guard stood in the room and I fought the urge to phase and run.

We walked forward as a group, a pair of vampires closed behind us, the sound of the doors closing echoed eerily behind us.

Chelsea and the two joined the other guards and the tension was so thick you could cut it with a butter knife.

The big three sat on their fancy chair. Just as regal and creepy as I remembered them to be. Their eyes milky red, their skin thin and white, like onion skin.

Aro stood up, a big smile on his face. He clapped his hands together. "Welcome, to Volterra!"

I reminded myself that this was for Matthew, it was the only way I could save him was by joining forces with these monsters. I just hope I haven't damned him as well.

 

**Fusedtwilight: How will the meeting go? What must Leah give in order to have Matthew back? Please review.**

 


	25. Chapter 25

Focused Madness

Chapter 25

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for her review. In this chapter The Volturi and our heroes join forces and Leah makes a choice you won't see coming.**

Fred P.O.V

I looked at the faces of the Volturi, the faces of her murderers.

I clenched my fists tight together and fought back a snarl. I had to keep calm and composed. I could not give them any excuse what so ever to harm anyone. Not the Cullens, the Denali coven, Nahuel his aunt, the wolves or Leah.

Before we arrived I activated my power. I sent out the smallest wave of repulsion into their minds. Just enough so they would not see me. My power touched the part of their minds that dealt with revulsion. I made it so they did not want to see me, it was so subtitle they would not even notice they were missing something. I was the proverbial elephant in the room.

The man Aro rose and clapped his hands together, welcoming us to Volterra. I knew who he was from the paintings Carlisle had. Caius was glaring at the wolves, hatred obvious in his eyes. Marcus. Marcus looked bored. He was looking off to the side, like he was seeing something the rest of us couldn't.

"Come now everyone, don't be so tense. The Cullens come to help us this time," Aro said to his guard.

"So they claim," Caius said.

"Aro, what I have told you about the boy and the danger of Joham is true," Carlisle said. "Alice has had a vision of this city burning to the ground, a result of Joham's schemes to use his children to take you out."

"Preposterous!" Caius growled, "as if a bunch of half-breeds could stand against us. Thousands of vampires have fallen to our might, how could one man and his spawn take us down?"

A ripple of murmuring filled the room. The guards agreed.

"Why else would we come here, Caius?" Carlisle asked calmly.

"Maybe to settle an old score?"

"Don't be ridiculous, even if I wanted to kill you and your coven why would I tell you ahead of time I was coming? Why would I come with so few vampires?"

"But why would you help us? After our last encounter you should be happy we are dead and some man is filling the world with more of your precious hybrids. How do we know you have not joined forces with him and while we prattle now he marches on to us now? You have proven to be capable of joining forces with our enemies before, I recall the Romanians with you that night."

"Despite what happened years ago, we know the importance the Volturi has to our world. Without you then the nomads will have nothing keeping them in check. It won't be long before they start fighting for territory all over the world. How many humans will die? How many newborns will be made as a result? How long before the humans learn of us?"

"How long indeed," Aro said.

"Aro, you do not believe this, are you?" Caius asked.

"Come now Caius, this has to be more than a hoax." he stepped forward and offered his hand to Carlisle.

Carlisle knew what to do next. He took Aro's hand and I watched as Carlisle showed Aro everything. There were times when his eyes widened in amazement and a crooked smile crossed his lips.

He let go of Carlise's hand and addressed the guard.

"My children, I fear what Carlisle and his friends say is true. We are about to be attacked by an old foe!"

The room began to buzz like angry bees. I saw Tanya and Kate holding hands looking tense and angry. The first time they met the Volturi they killed her mother, the second time they took her sister. There was some bad blood between the Denali sisters and the Volturi. I can only imagine the will it took them to come here and help protect the ones who took so much from them.

"Caius you asked how Joham with his army of hybrids will do what no vampire has done? Well I will tell you. There is a child, a wonderful, beautiful boy who dances between the lines of madness and sanity. He is a hybrid, but he has a power unlike anything we have ever seen, a gift so great it could be used to wipe us out in a single night!"

He paused for dramatic effect. I looked over to Leah who had a sad look on her face. The way Aro described Matthew struck something in her.

"A gift so powerful and complex why..." he walked over to Eleazar and extended his hand. "I must ask the expert on such things."

Eleazar held out his and and Aro took it eagerly. The look on his face was like a child watching his favorite Saturday morning cartoon.

He let go and a huge grin was plastered on his face. "A psychic-lens. A being who can manipulate the mental energies of the mind. Like Chelsea and Marcus, he can see and manipulate emotional bonds, in fact I dare say he is stronger than either."

Marcus did not seem to care someone was better at whatever it was he could do, Chelsea however looked a little miffed.

"He can sense and manipulate emotions, to him every single emotion has a color and he see's these aura's. Can you imagine what that must be like? The beauty? The symmetry? But it is one aspect of his gift that I am sure you will all love. His power allows him to make those of us who are gifted stronger. He can take our power and break down the limits we have."

Looks of surprise and awe crossed many faces. I could almost hear many guards wondering what their gifts were like with no limits.

"In fact Jane, you have met this boy."

He looked to a small girl with brunet colored hair. She stood next to a boy who looked very similar to her and I knew I was looking at Bree's killer.

"Remember, in South America?"

Jane's eyes which had been empty and neutral flared with anger and remembrance.

"He made your gift so powerful, the pain you inflicted on him shattered his mind," Aro went on.

A sick smile flashed on her face. The idea of breaking someone's mind pleased her immensely. A snarl escaped my lips but it was meek compared to the growl that escaped Leah's mouth. She bared her teeth at Jane and the boy next top her, who must be her twin Alec narrowed his eyes at her. Jane looked at Leah and it was smug, almost like she was taunting her.

"Carlisle, control the bitch before we put her in her place," Caius said, sneering at us.

Leah glared at him and the hate they were sending one another through their eyes at one another was so intense there should have been fire.

"Easy now Caius. Leah is very close with the boy, aren't you Leah?"

"Yes, he is my charge," Leah said proudly.

I thought he was going to do to her what he did to Eleazar. Instead he went to Edward and Edward already had his hand out, ready and waiting. Aro took it and smiled.

"Such a wonderful gift," Aro said. I did not know if he meant Edwards or Matthew's. "The world is so open to him, so beautiful. I wish I could see what he sees all the time. To see into the soul of a person."

Aro must be looking into Edward's memories of when he read Matthew's mind.

"But he is not the only one who you have found that is quit gifted. Show yourself Fred."

I did as he asked. I lowered the field and soon the room was filled with angry snarls as I appeared. Aro did not snarl but did grin.

"Hello Fred," he said.

I nodded in greeting. "Jane, do you recall when I sent you to deal with that newborn army growing in Seattle?"

"Yes master, they were all killed."

"No, you missed one."

Aro pointed at me and Jane glared at me. Like it was my fault she did a sloppy job and I just embarrassed her in front of her boss.

"Then the Cullens are guilty of harboring a fugitive!" Caius said sounding delighted.

Many of the guard leaned forward, looking eager. Waiting to be told they could attack.

"Not quite."

He held out his hand and with a little trepidation I took it. I expected to feel him inside my mind, but I felt nothing. I made sure I showed him images of how I have gone over to the Cullen way of life, how with Leah I helped raise Matthew. How controlled he was, how not dangerous.

Aro let go and addressed the guard.

"Normally we punish those who break our laws. But young Fred here is not guilty, in fact he is a victim. The vampire who turned him used him and the others. Manipulated him and tried to control him. But unlike the others who so easily fell for the deception Fred ran before he could be used and never once did he make a spectacle of himself. He never knew we existed, his creator was just using him and hoping we would kill him for her. Fred has done nothing to break our laws."

I saw Leah sigh in relief.

"And I doubt we could have found him even with Demitri's talent."

A vampire with black chin length hair looked startled.

"See, Fred has a power that makes an aura of utter revulsion so powerful, he can cause a room full of newborns to flee his presence, paralyze them with revulsion or even make it so the very thought of him makes you ill and you will not think of it. Dmitri, if you try to track him and he wills it you will find yourself to revolted to track him."

Demitri looked me up and down like he was not impressed.

"In fact Fred has been helping Leah protect Matthew for all these years." he walked over to Leah and she grabbed his hand before he could raise it. Some of the guard growled and Aro seemed surprised at how Leah just grabbed him.

Many of the guards glared at her and some looked at Aro with worry in their eyes. I wonder if they suspect the devotion they feel for him is a result of Chelsea's power?

Aro just smiled and he read her mind. His face tightened and he stared into her eyes, like he saw something he respected.

"Life has not been kind to you, child," Aro said.

"It has its moments," she said.

"You want impossible things child. You should be content with what you have and stop trying to attain what is not yours to have."

She pulled her hand out of his and Aro addressed the guard. Allow me to introduce Leah Clearwater, former beta to Jacob Black, lone alpha wolf, would be mother to a hybrid, and the only female shape-shifter to ever exist, oh wait, you're not the first."

"What?" Leah asked surprised.

Aro laughed when he saw the look of surprise on everyone's face. "Come now, do you not recall my words when last we met?"

"When you revealed we are not werewolves, you called us shape-shifters," Jake said.

"Exactly Jacob. Have none of you researched what I meant? Why the world is filled with stories of beings who could turn into all kinds of animals, wolves, panthers, eagles, jaguars, fish, snakes, you name it. Now as much as this might surprise you the Quileute tribe is not the only tribe, clan, or people to have guardians. All over the world, throughout history shape-shifters have existed. See during the early days of humanity, before technology when humans were still in harmony with nature there were those who learned to share the body of an animal. Now sometimes as a result of war, a desire to protect, or some other factor the two spirits would merge and volla a shape-shifter was born. As it happened with your Taha Aki. Nice story by the way."

Aro grinned at Leah and she glared at him darkly, not happy he knew her tribe's secrets.

"Now-a-days shape-shifters are descendants of those ancient beings who shared their souls with the great beasts. All to serve a purpose. To protect. See my friends, it was not just us you are protecting your tribe from. Shape-shifters protect their tribe from any danger, as you have done, taking care of those pesky drug dealers. Killing us was not what you were born to do my silly friends, you exist as a bridge between man and beast, between civility and savagery, you exist to protect your people from any and all danger."

"Have you encountered many shape-shifters before?" Embry asked curiously.

"My boy, I was ancient when Christ was being pinned down to the cross. I actually have the same lance they used to pierce his side, you should check out our gallery while you are here," he said. "But yes I have met a few shape-shifters here and there. Do not think yours is the only one that still exists. The only reason you have met none is because shape-shifters travel with the people they protect, they never travel away unless they must. Tell me, when was the last time a wolf of your tribe ever left? Ever went to live somewhere us when there was no need to? Leah left to protect the boy, but when was the last time a wolf ever left La Push?"

"As interesting as the mongrels are, what about this boy?" Caius cut in.

"Yes. Well, Joham will use his son to increase the power of his daughter Seraphina. She can create and control fire. With Matthew increasing her ability I do not doubt she will not be able to do it," Carlisle said.

Aro walked over to Alice. He smiled warmly at her, like a father looking at his favorite child, or a man looking at something he wanted badly. Aro held out his hand and Alice took it. He wrapped his hand around Alice's, I could see the greed on his face as he drank in her memories, her visions.

Jasper did not look happy and I did not feel happy either. I did not like how he looked at her, how he held her hand. I wanted to kill him and be done with it, I wanted to kill him to keep Alice safe.

Jasper must be projecting his emotions because when Esme put her hand on his shoulder the feelings stopped.

Aro let go and for once he looked shaken, unnerved even.

"What they say is true, I have seen the destruction of our coven, of our city, I see fire and death and I see us brought low by a single child."

The guard began to buzz angrily again.

"Then this means war!" Caius roared.

Many of the guard cheered to what Caius said.

Aro raised a hand and they quieted down.

"Yes, there will be a war. But this is not like before, Caius. Despite their origins these hybrids are powerful, gifted. Matthew alone could defeat us with his power. Imagine it, what if Joham had his son instigate a homicidal rage upon us all? With a single order his son could make us kill each other as if we were unruly newborns," Aro said.

"All the guards we have that are gifted and you are telling me not a single one of them can stop this abomination?" Caius asked.

"He is not an abomination!" Leah growled at him. "His name is Matthew, have you got that pretty boy?"

Caius stood up, anger radiated from him. "I will not be disrespected in my home by some wolf-bitch!"

Leah took a step forward. "Come say that to my face and I will teach you to fear shape-shifters as well."

It looked like there was going to be a fight. Caius's muscles tensed like he was about to spring forth. But Aro stopped him.

"Enough Caius, kill her and you risk killing our only weapon," Aro said.

"What?" Caius asked.

"Leah has powerful connections to the boy, right Leah?" Aro asked with a kind smile.

"Yes," Leah said through gritted teeth.

"She may be the only one hear who can put some sense into his head. Like it or not we need help Caius, help from the wolves, help from the Cullen's and the Denali coven."

"What? We do not need their help!" Caius said.

"Yes we do Caius. Imagine it, we meet them on the battlefield and Leach communes with the boy and convinces him to turn on Joham? And Bella is the only one who his power can not affect. We need their help; we are dealing with a foe that has an army to match us both in skill and power. We need all the help we can get."

He clapped his hands together and a single female guard stepped forward.

"Heidi, will take you to the rooms we have prepared. We must talk, we will call for you later."

"Please follow me," Heidi said.

We followed Heidi and I glanced back at Aro, he was facing Caius and Marcus but I could swear he was smiling.

Heidi led us down another hall and up a flight of stairs. She told us each of the rooms we were given, we were all paired up.

Carlisle, Esme.

Edward, Bella.

Jasper, Alice.

Rose, Emmett.

Eleazar, Carmen.

Garrett, Kate.

Me and Leah.

Jake, Embry and Quil.

Nahuel and his aunt.

And Tanya and Seth.

Heidi left us to settle in and we all stood in the hallway and began to go to our rooms to settle in. I followed Leah into our room. It was huge and extravagant. Leah's bags were at the foot of the bed.

"Better not have gone through my stuff," she muttered.

I put my hand on her arm. "Leah, are you okay? That little spat with Caius was-"

"Stupid, I know," she said.

"I was going to say cool, but a little risky too."

"I know. But when he called Matthew an abomination something in me snapped. I was pissed Aro was in my mind and knows all about my secrets. Hearing Caius go off on Matthew just pissed me off," she said.

I wrapped my hands around her and kissed her on the top of her head. "We need to be careful Leah; these people are our only hope."

"You're right, if you can do it then so can I. But you saw what Aro was like when he was reading our minds, he is going to try and take Matthew from us."

"He won't get the chance. You heard him; he needs our help, once we get him you and me run. I can keep us hidden, with Matthew amping my power they can never find us."

"Forever is a long time to hide," she said.

"I know. But we can do it."

There was a knock on the door. Leah went and opened it, I knew from the heart beat it had to be one of the wolves. Seth stood there, not looking happy.

"Seth what is it?" Leah asked.

"Alice has been watching the Volturi since we arrived. They have been discussing what to do about Matthew."

"They have come to a decision haven't they?"

"Yes, we need to get ready, they are sending Heidi to come and get us now."

"Shit, we'll be ready."

* * *

Leah P.O.V

It was ten minutes after Seth warned us Heidi reappeared.

"My masters have reached a decision, they wish to address you all," she said.

We all followed her back to the main hall. All the guards were still there. Aro was sitting down in his throne. I had tried to get Alice to tell me what they had decided but she refused to say. It did not bode well for me.

"Welcome back, everyone. Sorry to have you return so soon but we have come to a decision. We will accept your offer for help," Aro said.

"Thank you Aro," Carlisle said.

"But as for the matter of the boy, that is a different matter all together," Caius said with a smile that made my stomach feel like it was in an icy grip.

"What do you mean?" I demanded.

"Fear not Leah, we will not kill young Matthew," Aro said. "But I am afraid we will not be returning him to you."

"What!" I took a step forward but Fred caught my hand. "What do you mean you won't be returning him?" I demanded.

"As much as we appreciate you helping us I am afraid that we have decided that Matthew is too much for any of you to handle," Aro said.

"Oh and you can?" I asked snarkly.

"I think we are better equipped to handle him then you are," he said.

"That's a load of shit!"

"Is it? Had you been a better protector the boy would not have been stolen in the first place," Caius said with a sneer.

I felt like I had been slapped in the face. I wanted to phase so bad and rip him apart, but that would dumb. But it still felt like a good idea.

"I am afraid Caius has a point. The child is too strong to be allowed to run around unchecked. That power of his makes him too dangerous. We have decided the best place for him is with us."

"No! Absolutely not you can't do this, you have no right to him!" I argued.

"Neither do you beast," Caius said.

"No right? I have every right you megalomaniac! I have sacrificed for him, I have fed him, clothed him, treated him like he was my own son. I have more right to him then anyone else in this room!"

"You're obsession with him is obscene. It goes against nature itself!" Caius argued.

"We all go against nature; our very existence is odd!"

"Please sir," Fred said speaking to Aro, the sanest person here. "Leah and I looked after him for two years and we did a fine job. Had it not been for his sisters finding him we would have lived peacefully. Please don't take him from us now."

"I am sorry Fred, but if he can give a single individual power to destroy us then he is to much a risk for us to ignore. When the child Matthew is found he will be brought to us. We will take care of him," Aro said.

"Take care of him? You don't know how to take care of a child, especially one with needs like his, all you know how to do is manipulate and destroy!" I roared.

"Enough of this, remove her from our sight!" Caius said.

Two guards moved forward, the wolves tensed and gathered around me protectively. The guards continued forward but then they stopped. They let out snarls and covered their faces. I don't blame them. The smell of vampire which filled the air seemed so much worse, I seriously thought I was going to throw up.

The guys let out gagging sounds and were looking at anything but me. I covered my own face but the revulsion was still there. I felt Fred grab my shoulder in a tight grip. "I will take her," he said.

He led me out of the hall quickly. He opened one of the doors and closed it behind him.

"Fred, what the hell!" I said shaking his shoulder off, the revulsion was dissipating now.

"I should be asking you the same question Leah, you are provoking them!" he said looking angry.

"They are going to take him from us Fred!"

"I know, but we have to remain calm Leah." he put his hands on my face, cupping my cheeks gently in his hand. "We are on shaky ground right now Leah. If we let out emotions get out of control we may lose any chance we have to get him back. They may not let us help find Matthew."

I leaned into his touch, taking comfort from the cold of his hands. "I know, I know. But hearing them say what we are doing is unnatural, and making it seem like we did a horrible job raising him."

"We did not do a horrible job Leah, had his sisters not come it would have continued to be wonderful."

"I keep getting this image in my mind Fred, Matthew in one of those fucking black cloaks they wear, him standing next to Aro all blank faced and obedient like a dog. I can't let that happen Fred, I won't. I'd rather see Matthew dead before that happens!"

"Leah!" he said looking horrified.

"I know, I am horrible for saying that. I hate myself for thinking that but it's true. I can't bear the thought of him with Aro, that's a fate worse then death, Aro will never let him go and I won't let them make him into a monster."

"Enough! I will hear no more of this Leah, we will save him, do you hear me? We will save him and Aro will never get his hands on him! So stop talking like that, he is our son, our boy, how can you talk like this?"

"Because it's true. Could you let Aro have him? If you had a choice between killing him and letting Aro have him what would you chose?"

"I won't make such a decision because there will be no need to make one. You need to stop thinking about these things and get your head back in the game!"

I growled at him and pulled out of his grasp. "My head is in the game Fred, don't tell me it isn't!"

"Well when you start speaking like that I doubt it!"

We glared at one another, the first real fight we have ever had.

As horrible and monstrous as I felt for thinking such things. The idea of Matthew as Aro's pet of the millennium made a dark feeling of horror wash over my very soul. The thought of my sweet, loving, cheerful little boy turned into an apathetic monster was beyond comprehension.

It was my job to protect him. I was a mother. Mothers love, care, nurture, protect. But sometimes to protect our children, that means sometimes we have to do things that normally we would damn others for doing.

I could not bear the thought of Aro having him, because I know he would transform him into something that was not the Matthew I knew and loved. But could I do it? Could I take his life?

Could I take the life of someone I loved so, even if it was to save them from a life of evil and damnation. What would it do to me? For if I were to kill Matthew, even to save his soul, I would die too.

But as Fred said I still had hope to save Matthew from Joham and Aro. Still had the chance to take him home and kiss him and smother him with love.

But should the chips fall down and I have to chose to surrendering him to Aro, or making the ultimate sacrifice and keep him pure and innocent, safe from the madness of men and their ambitions.

Maybe I was a monster for thinking such thoughts. I may be a monster, but I am also a mother. And sometimes we have to protect our children from everything, including life itself.

Fred and I sat in a small room with the secretary.

We were silent, not having spoken a single word to one another.

The man at the desk offered us refreshments and what not to which we refused. He was polite enough for a lackey. He was going over some paper work at his desk and every once in a while would answer the phone, say something in Italian and redirect the call.

After an hour everyone came walking out either looking grim or angry. We stood up and greeted them. "What did we miss?" I asked.

"We tried to convince Aro not to keep Matthew from you, we all vouched for you but he refused us," Carlisle said.

"Damn it!" I growled.

"What now?" Fred asked.

"They are preparing to send some of their guard to seek out Matthew. They want you to go with them," Edward said.

"Damn right," I said.

"Of course we would not dare exclude you," a voice sneered.

They parted and the guy at the desk stood at attention. Caius came strolling forward, glaring at everyone.

"We will be sending Felix, Jane, Alec, Demitri, Chelsea, Corin, and Afton with you. You're brothers have requested to go as well."

"I wish to go as well," Fred said. "My gift will help us greatly."

"No, you may not," Caius said.

"What why not?" I demanded.

"Because it would be over kill. This is a recovery mission not a full scale purge. Aro believes you and the guard we have selected are all we require to bring the little brat back."

"But we don't know where he is," I said.

"You forget, Demitri has the scent of Joham and his daughters, he will sniff them out, now I suggest you get ready, we leave within the hour." Caius said.

He turned and left, looking glad to be leaving.

As soon as I was sure he was out of hearing range I was calling him a slew of names that made the human behind the desk glare at me.

"So what were just supposed to run with that crazy little bitch and the others?" I asked referring to Jane.

"Believe me we don't like it any more then you do," Jake said.

"Damn it all to hell!" I cursed.

"What is the real reason they won't let me go?" Fred asked Edward.

"Aro knows if you get a hold of Matthew you will try to run and if you do find him then you will be able to hide from him. I should also warn you he already has a way to make sure you don't try and leave."

"What?"

"Heidi."

"Heidi?"

"Yes, her gift is the exact reversal of yours. Where your gift effects the parts of the brain that deal with repulsion, her power affects the parts that deal with attraction. It draws people and vampires to her like metal to a loadstone. Aro has her using her power on Fred this very instant."

"What? But I don't feel anything," Fred said.

"Just try and think about leaving," Edward said.

Fred got a pained look on his face. He looked behind at the doors that led out; he scowled at them, like he was making a difficult choice.

"It is Heidi's power," Eleazar said, "she is focusing it on you so you cannot bare to be away from her."

"Then have Bella use her shield on Fred," I said.

"But if we do that then Caius might try and have Fred killed for disobeying orders," Jasper pointed out.

"He will. I can see it now," Alice said.

"Blast!" Fred said.

"Won't they let anyone of you come?" I asked Carlisle, "I will feel better knowing at least one of you is there."

"No, Aro wants us to wait here. In case the mission goes bad he doesn't want to risk any of us," Carlisle said.

"Why would the mission go bad?" I asked suspiciously.

"It was Caius's idea. He is hoping you wolves will be killed off and the guard will pick off Joham and his brood and bring back Matthew. That is why he suggested Chelsea go, he is hoping you find Matthew but she uses her power to make him loyal to the Volturi and something happens to you then he will have no where but them to turn to," Edward said.

"So it is a set up?" Jake asked.

"No, he just doesn't have much faith in your abilities," Edward said.

"Well he can go to hell," Quil said, "We can handle ourselves. But what are we going to do when we do get Matthew back? Without Fred Leah can't run with him."

"Yes she can," Fred said, "Matthew can imitate my power, I taught him how."

"Why don't we bring him here?" Seth said.

"That is the reverse of what we are trying to do moron!" I growled at him.

"No think of it, Matthew has the power to manipulate emotions right? Well what if he makes Aro let him go? Hell he can make him and Caius agree to it. He's capable of it right?"

"That could work," Eleazar said. "When I inspected his power I saw he was more than capable of using his power to manipulate others through their emotions."

"So he makes Aro and Caius more sympathetic and merciful and let him live with Leah and Fred," Seth said.

"Then maybe you shouldn't have thought of that until after you left because now Aro will read our minds and see what we planed moron!" Rose hissed at him.

"Oh yeah," Seth said.

"Look, right now I am just going to focus on getting Matthew back, we'll worry about the Volturi later," I said.

"Yes, once we know he is safe and secure from Joham we can worry about getting him away from the Volturi later," Carlisle said.

We all headed back for our rooms to get ready. We had spent so much time getting ready we only had another thirty minutes before me and the wolves had to get ready.

We were in our room and I had already changed for the journey. Fred was still not talking to me.

"Fred, please don't be like this," I said.

"Like what?" he asked.

"Cold, distant," I said.

"What do you expect me to act like Leah, you told me you will kill Matthew if you can't get him away from the Volturi. I can't approve of that you know."

"I am not asking you to approve, I don't even approve. But please, don't push me away like this, I can't leave with us having all this negative feelings between us."

He sighed. Maybe it was my words or maybe it was the desperation in my voice. He hugged me from behind. "I won't let you kill him Leah. Even if it means Aro has to have him forever. What Aro has planned for him isn't nearly as bad as what Joham does."

"Isn't it? You know what the Volturi have done, how selfish and hypocritical they are. Their just tyrants pretending to be the good guys. If they have Matthew it will only make their ego's grow more than what it already is. They will make him just like them and I won't lose him to another kind of monster."

"Is that what this is for you Leah? An assassination? Will you kill him as soon as you see him?" he asked. His grip on me tightened to painful levels.

"I don't want to kill him Fred; I want things to be as they were. But with Joham or the Volturi they will kill whatever good is in him and leave only a monster. If I can't save him...well...I will save him, one way or another."

He spun me so fast I think I pulled a muscle. His eyes were hard and full of anger, yet he still looked so beautiful to me. Even though looking at him now made my stomach hurt. Once again I was filling people I love with anger.

"I won't let you kill him Leah! Death is not an option! Do you hear me!"

"Then what else am I supposed to do Fred? Huh? Tell me?" I screamed at him.

"Do something! Don't just be so willing to end his life because you can't have him!"

"That's not it you fool! How can you let Aro have him so easily!"

"Do you think it does not pain me to think of him with them? But I would be happy to know he is alive and well!"

We glared at one another. I was mad and pissed and frustrated that everything we had worked for all these years was going down the drain and there was nothing I can do to stop it.

"You're a mother Leah! You're supposed to love and support your child no matter what, your supposed to raise them and nurture them an-"

"Wait! Fred that is it! You're a genius!"

I grabbed his face and kissed him on the lips. Whatever he was expecting it was not that.

"Ummm, did I miss something?" he asked confused.

I smiled. I wasn't going to tell him my plane. If I did I know he would object. But I had to do this, it was the only way Matthew could live and I could be with him.

"Don't worry Fred, I have come up with an idea that will make everything better for all of us, we're all going to win now, thank you Fred." I hugged him again. "If it wasn't for you I would be an absolute wreck."

"...ummmm. Weren't we just having a serious fight a moment ago?"

"Yes, but then you said something brilliant."

There was a knock on the door. Seth peaked his head in. "Everything okay guys?" he asked.

"Yes Seth, everything is fine," I said with a smile.

"Oh...okay, well it's time, we have to go to the main chamber now."

"Okay." I took Fred's hand in mine. "Come on, let's go talk with the leech kings."

I smiled as we headed for the main hall. As we gathered with the others Edward was looking at me with a serious look, but I mentally told him to keep his pie hole shut.

He nodded in understanding, he might not like my plan but he understands why I must do what I must.

It is the only way for Matthew and me to be together, the only way I can make sure he stays the sweet little boy I have raised. Even though it may be the final straw for my brothers.

But in the end, it will give me Matthew that is all that matters.

* * *

Joham P.O.V

I sat in my chair looking out of the window.

The door opened and I knew it was Rosemary coming to give her report.

"Father," she said.

"How is he?" I asked already knowing the answer.

"His condition has not changed. But he is complacent. The children try to get reactions out of him but he does not respond. They are upset at his condition."

"As they should. But it is good they see him like this, it is good for him to be around his family and it shows the others what happens if they try and disobey."

"Father, I can't do this again, I am sorry, I just can't," she said a sob escaping her throat.

I got up and looked at her. Tears were running down her face. "I can't do that to anyone ever again, please don't make me do it again. A few memories is one thing, but what I did to Matthew." she shook her head.

"There, there." I wrapped her in a hug, giving her comfort. "Fear not my child, I doubt the others will even dare to think of rebellion now. Just remember this was for the best."

"I keep blaming myself, I keep thinking if I had been more careful, if I had known Jane was there I would have never lost him and this would have never happened."

"There is no point in thinking of what if Rosemary. The past is dead, we must live in the here and now. Just remember when we rise and the Volturi fall Matthew will be remembered and loved by all," I said.

She wiped her face of tears. "Thank you father. I am sorry for crying like this, it is most shameful."

"It is only natural to feel guilt for what we have done my daughter. It is most sad and unfortunate, but take heart, for his sacrifice will not be in vain. Now go tend to your brother, he will need you now more then ever."

"Yes father at once." she turned and left me to my thoughts.

I turned back to look outside. I touched my own dry face. I have not cried since I was human and that was a long time ago. But my eyes have not stopped burning since two days ago.

I was glad I could not cry, because then I could not keep up the lie that I felt nothing. But in a sick way I am glad for the pain the burning causes. It is the only connection to the Matthew of old I have left, the only thing I will have to remind me of the shame and guilt foe what I have done.

If I must feel this burning in my eyes for all eternity then so be it. It is the smallest offering I can make to him for what I have done to him, for the loss's he has suffered and the greater loss that was to come.

* * *

Fred P.O.V

I don't know what I said to change Leah's mind but she was freaking me out.

She held my hand as we all went to the main hall to meet up with the guard. A part of me was glad not to be going. The idea of being around Jane for a long amount of time made me ill.

We arrived in the main hall. The only guards were the ones selected to go with the others to track Matthew.

"Well the time has come," Aro said. "Demitri as you know is our best tracker, the best in the world. He will find your friend by tracking the scents of his sisters. See Joham fooled us. Made us think he was dead when he had his daughter burn down the building they were staying in. But now that we know he is alive we can find him. Dmitri, you are in charge."

"Yes master," Demitri said bowing his head.

"Aro, before we leave I have a request," Leah said letting my hand go and stepping forward.

"Can it not wait until after the mission child?" he asked.

"No. I know you want Matthew to be brought with you. As you know I love him like he was my own son and I cannot bear the thought of being separated from him." Leah took a deep breath, steeling herself, getting herself ready. "I know Matthew will not stay hear willingly, and I know you won't let him leave alive, I know you won't risk your enemies using him against you. So...I request that after I bring him to you, you allow me to become a full fledged member of the Volturi coven, so that I can be with him, forever."

The room was quit as the grave with her request. The other vampires looked shocked; her pack brothers look deadly furious, even the Volturi, with the exception of Marcus looked surprised. Only Leah stood calm and reserved. As much as I was happy she found a way to not kill Matthew, another part of me despaired.

 

**Fusedtwilight: Next chapter they go on a rescue mission and Leah deals with the consequences of her choice. Please review.**


	26. Chapter 26

Focused Madness

Chapter 25

**Fusedtwilight: Sorry for the long wait, here is the next chapter**

 

Fred P.O.V

I looked at the faces of the Volturi, the faces of her murderers.

I clenched my fists tight together and fought back a snarl. I had to keep calm and composed. I could not give them any excuse what so ever to harm anyone. Not the Cullens, the Denali coven, Nahuel his aunt, the wolves or Leah.

Before we arrived I activated my power. I sent out the smallest wave of repulsion into their minds. Just enough so they would not see me. My power touched the part of their minds that dealt with revulsion. I made it so they did not want to see me, it was so subtitle they would not even notice they were missing something. I was the proverbial elephant in the room.

The man Aro rose and clapped his hands together, welcoming us to Volterra. I knew who he was from the paintings Carlisle had. Caius was glaring at the wolves, hatred obvious in his eyes. Marcus. Marcus looked bored. He was looking off to the side, like he was seeing something the rest of us couldn't.

"Come now everyone, don't be so tense. The Cullens come to help us this time," Aro said to his guard.

"So they claim," Caius said.

"Aro, what I have told you about the boy and the danger of Joham is true," Carlisle said. "Alice has had a vision of this city burning to the ground, a result of Joham's schemes to use his children to take you out."

"Preposterous!" Caius growled, "as if a bunch of half-breeds could stand against us. Thousands of vampires have fallen to our might, how could one man and his spawn take us down?"

A ripple of murmuring filled the room. The guards agreed.

"Why else would we come here, Caius?" Carlisle asked calmly.

"Maybe to settle an old score?"

"Don't be ridiculous, even if I wanted to kill you and your coven why would I tell you ahead of time I was coming? Why would I come with so few vampires?"

"But why would you help us? After our last encounter you should be happy we are dead and some man is filling the world with more of your precious hybrids. How do we know you have not joined forces with him and while we prattle now he marches on to us now? You have proven to be capable of joining forces with our enemies before, I recall the Romanians with you that night."

"Despite what happened years ago, we know the importance the Volturi has to our world. Without you then the nomads will have nothing keeping them in check. It won't be long before they start fighting for territory all over the world. How many humans will die? How many newborns will be made as a result? How long before the humans learn of us?"

"How long indeed," Aro said.

"Aro, you do not believe this, are you?" Caius asked.

"Come now Caius, this has to be more than a hoax." he stepped forward and offered his hand to Carlisle.

Carlisle knew what to do next. He took Aro's hand and I watched as Carlisle showed Aro everything. There were times when his eyes widened in amazement and a crooked smile crossed his lips.

He let go of Carlise's hand and addressed the guard.

"My children, I fear what Carlisle and his friends say is true. We are about to be attacked by an old foe!"

The room began to buzz like angry bees. I saw Tanya and Kate holding hands looking tense and angry. The first time they met the Volturi they killed her mother, the second time they took her sister. There was some bad blood between the Denali sisters and the Volturi. I can only imagine the will it took them to come here and help protect the ones who took so much from them.

"Caius you asked how Joham with his army of hybrids will do what no vampire has done? Well I will tell you. There is a child, a wonderful, beautiful boy who dances between the lines of madness and sanity. He is a hybrid, but he has a power unlike anything we have ever seen, a gift so great it could be used to wipe us out in a single night!"

He paused for dramatic effect. I looked over to Leah who had a sad look on her face. The way Aro described Matthew struck something in her.

"A gift so powerful and complex why..." he walked over to Eleazar and extended his hand. "I must ask the expert on such things."

Eleazar held out his and and Aro took it eagerly. The look on his face was like a child watching his favorite Saturday morning cartoon.

He let go and a huge grin was plastered on his face. "A psychic-lens. A being who can manipulate the mental energies of the mind. Like Chelsea and Marcus, he can see and manipulate emotional bonds, in fact I dare say he is stronger than either."

Marcus did not seem to care someone was better at whatever it was he could do, Chelsea however looked a little miffed.

"He can sense and manipulate emotions, to him every single emotion has a color and he see's these aura's. Can you imagine what that must be like? The beauty? The symmetry? But it is one aspect of his gift that I am sure you will all love. His power allows him to make those of us who are gifted stronger. He can take our power and break down the limits we have."

Looks of surprise and awe crossed many faces. I could almost hear many guards wondering what their gifts were like with no limits.

"In fact Jane, you have met this boy."

He looked to a small girl with brunet colored hair. She stood next to a boy who looked very similar to her and I knew I was looking at Bree's killer.

"Remember, in South America?"

Jane's eyes which had been empty and neutral flared with anger and remembrance.

"He made your gift so powerful, the pain you inflicted on him shattered his mind," Aro went on.

A sick smile flashed on her face. The idea of breaking someone's mind pleased her immensely. A snarl escaped my lips but it was meek compared to the growl that escaped Leah's mouth. She bared her teeth at Jane and the boy next top her, who must be her twin Alec narrowed his eyes at her. Jane looked at Leah and it was smug, almost like she was taunting her.

"Carlisle, control the bitch before we put her in her place," Caius said, sneering at us.

Leah glared at him and the hate they were sending one another through their eyes at one another was so intense there should have been fire.

"Easy now Caius. Leah is very close with the boy, aren't you Leah?"

"Yes, he is my charge," Leah said proudly.

I thought he was going to do to her what he did to Eleazar. Instead he went to Edward and Edward already had his hand out, ready and waiting. Aro took it and smiled.

"Such a wonderful gift," Aro said. I did not know if he meant Edwards or Matthew's. "The world is so open to him, so beautiful. I wish I could see what he sees all the time. To see into the soul of a person."

Aro must be looking into Edward's memories of when he read Matthew's mind.

"But he is not the only one who you have found that is quit gifted. Show yourself Fred."

I did as he asked. I lowered the field and soon the room was filled with angry snarls as I appeared. Aro did not snarl but did grin.

"Hello Fred," he said.

I nodded in greeting. "Jane, do you recall when I sent you to deal with that newborn army growing in Seattle?"

"Yes master, they were all killed."

"No, you missed one."

Aro pointed at me and Jane glared at me. Like it was my fault she did a sloppy job and I just embarrassed her in front of her boss.

"Then the Cullens are guilty of harboring a fugitive!" Caius said sounding delighted.

Many of the guard leaned forward, looking eager. Waiting to be told they could attack.

"Not quite."

He held out his hand and with a little trepidation I took it. I expected to feel him inside my mind, but I felt nothing. I made sure I showed him images of how I have gone over to the Cullen way of life, how with Leah I helped raise Matthew. How controlled he was, how not dangerous.

Aro let go and addressed the guard.

"Normally we punish those who break our laws. But young Fred here is not guilty, in fact he is a victim. The vampire who turned him used him and the others. Manipulated him and tried to control him. But unlike the others who so easily fell for the deception Fred ran before he could be used and never once did he make a spectacle of himself. He never knew we existed, his creator was just using him and hoping we would kill him for her. Fred has done nothing to break our laws."

I saw Leah sigh in relief.

"And I doubt we could have found him even with Demitri's talent."

A vampire with black chin length hair looked startled.

"See, Fred has a power that makes an aura of utter revulsion so powerful, he can cause a room full of newborns to flee his presence, paralyze them with revulsion or even make it so the very thought of him makes you ill and you will not think of it. Dmitri, if you try to track him and he wills it you will find yourself to revolted to track him."

Demitri looked me up and down like he was not impressed.

"In fact Fred has been helping Leah protect Matthew for all these years." he walked over to Leah and she grabbed his hand before he could raise it. Some of the guard growled and Aro seemed surprised at how Leah just grabbed him.

Many of the guards glared at her and some looked at Aro with worry in their eyes. I wonder if they suspect the devotion they feel for him is a result of Chelsea's power?

Aro just smiled and he read her mind. His face tightened and he stared into her eyes, like he saw something he respected.

"Life has not been kind to you, child," Aro said.

"It has its moments," she said.

"You want impossible things child. You should be content with what you have and stop trying to attain what is not yours to have."

She pulled her hand out of his and Aro addressed the guard. Allow me to introduce Leah Clearwater, former beta to Jacob Black, lone alpha wolf, would be mother to a hybrid, and the only female shape-shifter to ever exist, oh wait, you're not the first."

"What?" Leah asked surprised.

Aro laughed when he saw the look of surprise on everyone's face. "Come now, do you not recall my words when last we met?"

"When you revealed we are not werewolves, you called us shape-shifters," Jake said.

"Exactly Jacob. Have none of you researched what I meant? Why the world is filled with stories of beings who could turn into all kinds of animals, wolves, panthers, eagles, jaguars, fish, snakes, you name it. Now as much as this might surprise you the Quileute tribe is not the only tribe, clan, or people to have guardians. All over the world, throughout history shape-shifters have existed. See during the early days of humanity, before technology when humans were still in harmony with nature there were those who learned to share the body of an animal. Now sometimes as a result of war, a desire to protect, or some other factor the two spirits would merge and volla a shape-shifter was born. As it happened with your Taha Aki. Nice story by the way."

Aro grinned at Leah and she glared at him darkly, not happy he knew her tribe's secrets.

"Now-a-days shape-shifters are descendants of those ancient beings who shared their souls with the great beasts. All to serve a purpose. To protect. See my friends, it was not just us you are protecting your tribe from. Shape-shifters protect their tribe from any danger, as you have done, taking care of those pesky drug dealers. Killing us was not what you were born to do my silly friends, you exist as a bridge between man and beast, between civility and savagery, you exist to protect your people from any and all danger."

"Have you encountered many shape-shifters before?" Embry asked curiously.

"My boy, I was ancient when Christ was being pinned down to the cross. I actually have the same lance they used to pierce his side, you should check out our gallery while you are here," he said. "But yes I have met a few shape-shifters here and there. Do not think yours is the only one that still exists. The only reason you have met none is because shape-shifters travel with the people they protect, they never travel away unless they must. Tell me, when was the last time a wolf of your tribe ever left? Ever went to live somewhere us when there was no need to? Leah left to protect the boy, but when was the last time a wolf ever left La Push?"

"As interesting as the mongrels are, what about this boy?" Caius cut in.

"Yes. Well, Joham will use his son to increase the power of his daughter Seraphina. She can create and control fire. With Matthew increasing her ability I do not doubt she will not be able to do it," Carlisle said.

Aro walked over to Alice. He smiled warmly at her, like a father looking at his favorite child, or a man looking at something he wanted badly. Aro held out his hand and Alice took it. He wrapped his hand around Alice's, I could see the greed on his face as he drank in her memories, her visions.

Jasper did not look happy and I did not feel happy either. I did not like how he looked at her, how he held her hand. I wanted to kill him and be done with it, I wanted to kill him to keep Alice safe.

Jasper must be projecting his emotions because when Esme put her hand on his shoulder the feelings stopped.

Aro let go and for once he looked shaken, unnerved even.

"What they say is true, I have seen the destruction of our coven, of our city, I see fire and death and I see us brought low by a single child."

The guard began to buzz angrily again.

"Then this means war!" Caius roared.

Many of the guard cheered to what Caius said.

Aro raised a hand and they quieted down.

"Yes, there will be a war. But this is not like before, Caius. Despite their origins these hybrids are powerful, gifted. Matthew alone could defeat us with his power. Imagine it, what if Joham had his son instigate a homicidal rage upon us all? With a single order his son could make us kill each other as if we were unruly newborns," Aro said.

"All the guards we have that are gifted and you are telling me not a single one of them can stop this abomination?" Caius asked.

"He is not an abomination!" Leah growled at him. "His name is Matthew, have you got that pretty boy?"

Caius stood up, anger radiated from him. "I will not be disrespected in my home by some wolf-bitch!"

Leah took a step forward. "Come say that to my face and I will teach you to fear shape-shifters as well."

It looked like there was going to be a fight. Caius's muscles tensed like he was about to spring forth. But Aro stopped him.

"Enough Caius, kill her and you risk killing our only weapon," Aro said.

"What?" Caius asked.

"Leah has powerful connections to the boy, right Leah?" Aro asked with a kind smile.

"Yes," Leah said through gritted teeth.

"She may be the only one hear who can put some sense into his head. Like it or not we need help Caius, help from the wolves, help from the Cullen's and the Denali coven."

"What? We do not need their help!" Caius said.

"Yes we do Caius. Imagine it, we meet them on the battlefield and Leach communes with the boy and convinces him to turn on Joham? And Bella is the only one who his power can not affect. We need their help; we are dealing with a foe that has an army to match us both in skill and power. We need all the help we can get."

He clapped his hands together and a single female guard stepped forward.

"Heidi, will take you to the rooms we have prepared. We must talk, we will call for you later."

"Please follow me," Heidi said.

We followed Heidi and I glanced back at Aro, he was facing Caius and Marcus but I could swear he was smiling.

Heidi led us down another hall and up a flight of stairs. She told us each of the rooms we were given, we were all paired up.

Carlisle, Esme.

Edward, Bella.

Jasper, Alice.

Rose, Emmett.

Eleazar, Carmen.

Garrett, Kate.

Me and Leah.

Jake, Embry and Quil.

Nahuel and his aunt.

And Tanya and Seth.

Heidi left us to settle in and we all stood in the hallway and began to go to our rooms to settle in. I followed Leah into our room. It was huge and extravagant. Leah's bags were at the foot of the bed.

"Better not have gone through my stuff," she muttered.

I put my hand on her arm. "Leah, are you okay? That little spat with Caius was-"

"Stupid, I know," she said.

"I was going to say cool, but a little risky too."

"I know. But when he called Matthew an abomination something in me snapped. I was pissed Aro was in my mind and knows all about my secrets. Hearing Caius go off on Matthew just pissed me off," she said.

I wrapped my hands around her and kissed her on the top of her head. "We need to be careful Leah; these people are our only hope."

"You're right, if you can do it then so can I. But you saw what Aro was like when he was reading our minds, he is going to try and take Matthew from us."

"He won't get the chance. You heard him; he needs our help, once we get him you and me run. I can keep us hidden, with Matthew amping my power they can never find us."

"Forever is a long time to hide," she said.

"I know. But we can do it."

There was a knock on the door. Leah went and opened it, I knew from the heart beat it had to be one of the wolves. Seth stood there, not looking happy.

"Seth what is it?" Leah asked.

"Alice has been watching the Volturi since we arrived. They have been discussing what to do about Matthew."

"They have come to a decision haven't they?"

"Yes, we need to get ready, they are sending Heidi to come and get us now."

"Shit, we'll be ready."

* * *

Leah P.O.V

It was ten minutes after Seth warned us Heidi reappeared.

"My masters have reached a decision, they wish to address you all," she said.

We all followed her back to the main hall. All the guards were still there. Aro was sitting down in his throne. I had tried to get Alice to tell me what they had decided but she refused to say. It did not bode well for me.

"Welcome back, everyone. Sorry to have you return so soon but we have come to a decision. We will accept your offer for help," Aro said.

"Thank you Aro," Carlisle said.

"But as for the matter of the boy, that is a different matter all together," Caius said with a smile that made my stomach feel like it was in an icy grip.

"What do you mean?" I demanded.

"Fear not Leah, we will not kill young Matthew," Aro said. "But I am afraid we will not be returning him to you."

"What!" I took a step forward but Fred caught my hand. "What do you mean you won't be returning him?" I demanded.

"As much as we appreciate you helping us I am afraid that we have decided that Matthew is too much for any of you to handle," Aro said.

"Oh and you can?" I asked snarkly.

"I think we are better equipped to handle him then you are," he said.

"That's a load of shit!"

"Is it? Had you been a better protector the boy would not have been stolen in the first place," Caius said with a sneer.

I felt like I had been slapped in the face. I wanted to phase so bad and rip him apart, but that would dumb. But it still felt like a good idea.

"I am afraid Caius has a point. The child is too strong to be allowed to run around unchecked. That power of his makes him too dangerous. We have decided the best place for him is with us."

"No! Absolutely not you can't do this, you have no right to him!" I argued.

"Neither do you beast," Caius said.

"No right? I have every right you megalomaniac! I have sacrificed for him, I have fed him, clothed him, treated him like he was my own son. I have more right to him then anyone else in this room!"

"You're obsession with him is obscene. It goes against nature itself!" Caius argued.

"We all go against nature; our very existence is odd!"

"Please sir," Fred said speaking to Aro, the sanest person here. "Leah and I looked after him for two years and we did a fine job. Had it not been for his sisters finding him we would have lived peacefully. Please don't take him from us now."

"I am sorry Fred, but if he can give a single individual power to destroy us then he is to much a risk for us to ignore. When the child Matthew is found he will be brought to us. We will take care of him," Aro said.

"Take care of him? You don't know how to take care of a child, especially one with needs like his, all you know how to do is manipulate and destroy!" I roared.

"Enough of this, remove her from our sight!" Caius said.

Two guards moved forward, the wolves tensed and gathered around me protectively. The guards continued forward but then they stopped. They let out snarls and covered their faces. I don't blame them. The smell of vampire which filled the air seemed so much worse, I seriously thought I was going to throw up.

The guys let out gagging sounds and were looking at anything but me. I covered my own face but the revulsion was still there. I felt Fred grab my shoulder in a tight grip. "I will take her," he said.

He led me out of the hall quickly. He opened one of the doors and closed it behind him.

"Fred, what the hell!" I said shaking his shoulder off, the revulsion was dissipating now.

"I should be asking you the same question Leah, you are provoking them!" he said looking angry.

"They are going to take him from us Fred!"

"I know, but we have to remain calm Leah." he put his hands on my face, cupping my cheeks gently in his hand. "We are on shaky ground right now Leah. If we let out emotions get out of control we may lose any chance we have to get him back. They may not let us help find Matthew."

I leaned into his touch, taking comfort from the cold of his hands. "I know, I know. But hearing them say what we are doing is unnatural, and making it seem like we did a horrible job raising him."

"We did not do a horrible job Leah, had his sisters not come it would have continued to be wonderful."

"I keep getting this image in my mind Fred, Matthew in one of those fucking black cloaks they wear, him standing next to Aro all blank faced and obedient like a dog. I can't let that happen Fred, I won't. I'd rather see Matthew dead before that happens!"

"Leah!" he said looking horrified.

"I know, I am horrible for saying that. I hate myself for thinking that but it's true. I can't bear the thought of him with Aro, that's a fate worse then death, Aro will never let him go and I won't let them make him into a monster."

"Enough! I will hear no more of this Leah, we will save him, do you hear me? We will save him and Aro will never get his hands on him! So stop talking like that, he is our son, our boy, how can you talk like this?"

"Because it's true. Could you let Aro have him? If you had a choice between killing him and letting Aro have him what would you chose?"

"I won't make such a decision because there will be no need to make one. You need to stop thinking about these things and get your head back in the game!"

I growled at him and pulled out of his grasp. "My head is in the game Fred, don't tell me it isn't!"

"Well when you start speaking like that I doubt it!"

We glared at one another, the first real fight we have ever had.

As horrible and monstrous as I felt for thinking such things. The idea of Matthew as Aro's pet of the millennium made a dark feeling of horror wash over my very soul. The thought of my sweet, loving, cheerful little boy turned into an apathetic monster was beyond comprehension.

It was my job to protect him. I was a mother. Mothers love, care, nurture, protect. But sometimes to protect our children, that means sometimes we have to do things that normally we would damn others for doing.

I could not bear the thought of Aro having him, because I know he would transform him into something that was not the Matthew I knew and loved. But could I do it? Could I take his life?

Could I take the life of someone I loved so, even if it was to save them from a life of evil and damnation. What would it do to me? For if I were to kill Matthew, even to save his soul, I would die too.

But as Fred said I still had hope to save Matthew from Joham and Aro. Still had the chance to take him home and kiss him and smother him with love.

But should the chips fall down and I have to chose to surrendering him to Aro, or making the ultimate sacrifice and keep him pure and innocent, safe from the madness of men and their ambitions.

Maybe I was a monster for thinking such thoughts. I may be a monster, but I am also a mother. And sometimes we have to protect our children from everything, including life itself.

Fred and I sat in a small room with the secretary.

We were silent, not having spoken a single word to one another.

The man at the desk offered us refreshments and what not to which we refused. He was polite enough for a lackey. He was going over some paper work at his desk and every once in a while would answer the phone, say something in Italian and redirect the call.

After an hour everyone came walking out either looking grim or angry. We stood up and greeted them. "What did we miss?" I asked.

"We tried to convince Aro not to keep Matthew from you, we all vouched for you but he refused us," Carlisle said.

"Damn it!" I growled.

"What now?" Fred asked.

"They are preparing to send some of their guard to seek out Matthew. They want you to go with them," Edward said.

"Damn right," I said.

"Of course we would not dare exclude you," a voice sneered.

They parted and the guy at the desk stood at attention. Caius came strolling forward, glaring at everyone.

"We will be sending Felix, Jane, Alec, Demitri, Chelsea, Corin, and Afton with you. You're brothers have requested to go as well."

"I wish to go as well," Fred said. "My gift will help us greatly."

"No, you may not," Caius said.

"What why not?" I demanded.

"Because it would be over kill. This is a recovery mission not a full scale purge. Aro believes you and the guard we have selected are all we require to bring the little brat back."

"But we don't know where he is," I said.

"You forget, Demitri has the scent of Joham and his daughters, he will sniff them out, now I suggest you get ready, we leave within the hour." Caius said.

He turned and left, looking glad to be leaving.

As soon as I was sure he was out of hearing range I was calling him a slew of names that made the human behind the desk glare at me.

"So what were just supposed to run with that crazy little bitch and the others?" I asked referring to Jane.

"Believe me we don't like it any more then you do," Jake said.

"Damn it all to hell!" I cursed.

"What is the real reason they won't let me go?" Fred asked Edward.

"Aro knows if you get a hold of Matthew you will try to run and if you do find him then you will be able to hide from him. I should also warn you he already has a way to make sure you don't try and leave."

"What?"

"Heidi."

"Heidi?"

"Yes, her gift is the exact reversal of yours. Where your gift effects the parts of the brain that deal with repulsion, her power affects the parts that deal with attraction. It draws people and vampires to her like metal to a loadstone. Aro has her using her power on Fred this very instant."

"What? But I don't feel anything," Fred said.

"Just try and think about leaving," Edward said.

Fred got a pained look on his face. He looked behind at the doors that led out; he scowled at them, like he was making a difficult choice.

"It is Heidi's power," Eleazar said, "she is focusing it on you so you cannot bare to be away from her."

"Then have Bella use her shield on Fred," I said.

"But if we do that then Caius might try and have Fred killed for disobeying orders," Jasper pointed out.

"He will. I can see it now," Alice said.

"Blast!" Fred said.

"Won't they let anyone of you come?" I asked Carlisle, "I will feel better knowing at least one of you is there."

"No, Aro wants us to wait here. In case the mission goes bad he doesn't want to risk any of us," Carlisle said.

"Why would the mission go bad?" I asked suspiciously.

"It was Caius's idea. He is hoping you wolves will be killed off and the guard will pick off Joham and his brood and bring back Matthew. That is why he suggested Chelsea go, he is hoping you find Matthew but she uses her power to make him loyal to the Volturi and something happens to you then he will have no where but them to turn to," Edward said.

"So it is a set up?" Jake asked.

"No, he just doesn't have much faith in your abilities," Edward said.

"Well he can go to hell," Quil said, "We can handle ourselves. But what are we going to do when we do get Matthew back? Without Fred Leah can't run with him."

"Yes she can," Fred said, "Matthew can imitate my power, I taught him how."

"Why don't we bring him here?" Seth said.

"That is the reverse of what we are trying to do moron!" I growled at him.

"No think of it, Matthew has the power to manipulate emotions right? Well what if he makes Aro let him go? Hell he can make him and Caius agree to it. He's capable of it right?"

"That could work," Eleazar said. "When I inspected his power I saw he was more than capable of using his power to manipulate others through their emotions."

"So he makes Aro and Caius more sympathetic and merciful and let him live with Leah and Fred," Seth said.

"Then maybe you shouldn't have thought of that until after you left because now Aro will read our minds and see what we planed moron!" Rose hissed at him.

"Oh yeah," Seth said.

"Look, right now I am just going to focus on getting Matthew back, we'll worry about the Volturi later," I said.

"Yes, once we know he is safe and secure from Joham we can worry about getting him away from the Volturi later," Carlisle said.

We all headed back for our rooms to get ready. We had spent so much time getting ready we only had another thirty minutes before me and the wolves had to get ready.

We were in our room and I had already changed for the journey. Fred was still not talking to me.

"Fred, please don't be like this," I said.

"Like what?" he asked.

"Cold, distant," I said.

"What do you expect me to act like Leah, you told me you will kill Matthew if you can't get him away from the Volturi. I can't approve of that you know."

"I am not asking you to approve, I don't even approve. But please, don't push me away like this, I can't leave with us having all this negative feelings between us."

He sighed. Maybe it was my words or maybe it was the desperation in my voice. He hugged me from behind. "I won't let you kill him Leah. Even if it means Aro has to have him forever. What Aro has planned for him isn't nearly as bad as what Joham does."

"Isn't it? You know what the Volturi have done, how selfish and hypocritical they are. Their just tyrants pretending to be the good guys. If they have Matthew it will only make their ego's grow more than what it already is. They will make him just like them and I won't lose him to another kind of monster."

"Is that what this is for you Leah? An assassination? Will you kill him as soon as you see him?" he asked. His grip on me tightened to painful levels.

"I don't want to kill him Fred; I want things to be as they were. But with Joham or the Volturi they will kill whatever good is in him and leave only a monster. If I can't save him...well...I will save him, one way or another."

He spun me so fast I think I pulled a muscle. His eyes were hard and full of anger, yet he still looked so beautiful to me. Even though looking at him now made my stomach hurt. Once again I was filling people I love with anger.

"I won't let you kill him Leah! Death is not an option! Do you hear me!"

"Then what else am I supposed to do Fred? Huh? Tell me?" I screamed at him.

"Do something! Don't just be so willing to end his life because you can't have him!"

"That's not it you fool! How can you let Aro have him so easily!"

"Do you think it does not pain me to think of him with them? But I would be happy to know he is alive and well!"

We glared at one another. I was mad and pissed and frustrated that everything we had worked for all these years was going down the drain and there was nothing I can do to stop it.

"You're a mother Leah! You're supposed to love and support your child no matter what, your supposed to raise them and nurture them an-"

"Wait! Fred that is it! You're a genius!"

I grabbed his face and kissed him on the lips. Whatever he was expecting it was not that.

"Ummm, did I miss something?" he asked confused.

I smiled. I wasn't going to tell him my plane. If I did I know he would object. But I had to do this, it was the only way Matthew could live and I could be with him.

"Don't worry Fred, I have come up with an idea that will make everything better for all of us, we're all going to win now, thank you Fred." I hugged him again. "If it wasn't for you I would be an absolute wreck."

"...ummmm. Weren't we just having a serious fight a moment ago?"

"Yes, but then you said something brilliant."

There was a knock on the door. Seth peaked his head in. "Everything okay guys?" he asked.

"Yes Seth, everything is fine," I said with a smile.

"Oh...okay, well it's time, we have to go to the main chamber now."

"Okay." I took Fred's hand in mine. "Come on, let's go talk with the leech kings."

I smiled as we headed for the main hall. As we gathered with the others Edward was looking at me with a serious look, but I mentally told him to keep his pie hole shut.

He nodded in understanding, he might not like my plan but he understands why I must do what I must.

It is the only way for Matthew and me to be together, the only way I can make sure he stays the sweet little boy I have raised. Even though it may be the final straw for my brothers.

But in the end, it will give me Matthew that is all that matters.

* * *

Joham P.O.V

I sat in my chair looking out of the window.

The door opened and I knew it was Rosemary coming to give her report.

"Father," she said.

"How is he?" I asked already knowing the answer.

"His condition has not changed. But he is complacent. The children try to get reactions out of him but he does not respond. They are upset at his condition."

"As they should. But it is good they see him like this, it is good for him to be around his family and it shows the others what happens if they try and disobey."

"Father, I can't do this again, I am sorry, I just can't," she said a sob escaping her throat.

I got up and looked at her. Tears were running down her face. "I can't do that to anyone ever again, please don't make me do it again. A few memories is one thing, but what I did to Matthew." she shook her head.

"There, there." I wrapped her in a hug, giving her comfort. "Fear not my child, I doubt the others will even dare to think of rebellion now. Just remember this was for the best."

"I keep blaming myself, I keep thinking if I had been more careful, if I had known Jane was there I would have never lost him and this would have never happened."

"There is no point in thinking of what if Rosemary. The past is dead, we must live in the here and now. Just remember when we rise and the Volturi fall Matthew will be remembered and loved by all," I said.

She wiped her face of tears. "Thank you father. I am sorry for crying like this, it is most shameful."

"It is only natural to feel guilt for what we have done my daughter. It is most sad and unfortunate, but take heart, for his sacrifice will not be in vain. Now go tend to your brother, he will need you now more then ever."

"Yes father at once." she turned and left me to my thoughts.

I turned back to look outside. I touched my own dry face. I have not cried since I was human and that was a long time ago. But my eyes have not stopped burning since two days ago.

I was glad I could not cry, because then I could not keep up the lie that I felt nothing. But in a sick way I am glad for the pain the burning causes. It is the only connection to the Matthew of old I have left, the only thing I will have to remind me of the shame and guilt foe what I have done.

If I must feel this burning in my eyes for all eternity then so be it. It is the smallest offering I can make to him for what I have done to him, for the loss's he has suffered and the greater loss that was to come.

* * *

Fred P.O.V

I don't know what I said to change Leah's mind but she was freaking me out.

She held my hand as we all went to the main hall to meet up with the guard. A part of me was glad not to be going. The idea of being around Jane for a long amount of time made me ill.

We arrived in the main hall. The only guards were the ones selected to go with the others to track Matthew.

"Well the time has come," Aro said. "Demitri as you know is our best tracker, the best in the world. He will find your friend by tracking the scents of his sisters. See Joham fooled us. Made us think he was dead when he had his daughter burn down the building they were staying in. But now that we know he is alive we can find him. Dmitri, you are in charge."

"Yes master," Demitri said bowing his head.

"Aro, before we leave I have a request," Leah said letting my hand go and stepping forward.

"Can it not wait until after the mission child?" he asked.

"No. I know you want Matthew to be brought with you. As you know I love him like he was my own son and I cannot bear the thought of being separated from him." Leah took a deep breath, steeling herself, getting herself ready. "I know Matthew will not stay hear willingly, and I know you won't let him leave alive, I know you won't risk your enemies using him against you. So...I request that after I bring him to you, you allow me to become a full fledged member of the Volturi coven, so that I can be with him, forever."

The room was quit as the grave with her request. The other vampires looked shocked; her pack brothers look deadly furious, even the Volturi, with the exception of Marcus looked surprised. Only Leah stood calm and reserved. As much as I was happy she found a way to not kill Matthew, another part of me despaired.


	27. Chapter 27

Focused Madness

Chapter 26

 

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki. This chapter Leah deals with the consequences of her actions, Heidi pushes Fred's buttons and Alice reveals Leah's future, which does not look good.**

 

Leah P.O.V

The compartment was silent.

It was a few hours after we left Volterra. Aro had gladly accepted my offer but suffice it to say not everyone was happy with my decision.

Namely my friends.

After the shocked silence my old pack immediately began to yell and scream. But I kept my composure. As much as the thought of joining these cock suckers made me ill, worse than Fred's power, the idea of not being with Matthew anymore was a thousand times worse.

It went against every moral code and belief of my people. But it was the only way I could help protect Matthew from Aro's poison. It was the only other path that did not include me killing him.

People may say they never have a choice, but that is not true. We have lots of choices we can make; the only thing stopping us is our morals or our inability to see the possibilities. I would rather burn in hell then be their lap dog. But it gave me Matthew, so I would do it.

While the others were shouting at me I looked at Fred. He stood there calm as could be. But when I looked in his eyes I could see the turmoil. His lips moved silently,

"Why?" he asked.

I moved my lips silently as well. So he could read my lips.

"It is the only way."

Realization shined in his eyes. He knew why I was doing this.

After that I had to yell at the others to shut up that I had made my choice, we had to get going and we had no time for yelling. I mentally asked Edward to explain my reasons for doing this to the others.

Before we left Nahuel took me aside and told me I did not have to do this. I told him I did.

"But why?"

"Because it lets me be with him again. It is the only way I can protect him," I said.

We took a private train that would take us to Romania. It was real nice on the inside. If I was not so concerned with my friend's cold attitude to me right now I would enjoy it more. The country side was very beautiful, but it did little to lighten things up.

The vampires were on another part of the train. I was grateful, I had a feeling their presence would not help things.

"So...nice outside huh?" I said.

No one spoke, or even looked at me. I sighed.

"Look, I know you guys are pissed at me. And I am sorry, but I have to do this."

"Do you Leah?" Seth asked.

"Yes I do. Aro has prepared for everything. Every idea and move we had to snatch Matthew and keep him from Aro has failed. I saw the greedy look in his eyes, you all did. He will not stop until Matthew is his, and I have a strong feeling he feels if he can't have him, then no one will."

"So you're going to join our sworn enemies?" Quil asked glaring at me.

I met his glare with a simple stare. "Yes."

Seth slammed his fist onto the side of the wall. His teeth were barred and a deep growl escaped his lips. "That is bullshit Leah! You shouldn't have made this decision without talking to us first!"

"I didn't really have much time to talk, it just popped up. And I made my choice Seth; there is nothing to talk about it."

"No, way I am not going to let you do this Leah, if I have to drag you back home kicking and screaming I will do it! I won't let you ruin your life!"

"I am not too thrilled about it either Seth but I have to." I looked to Jake; his face looked so much like Billy's during a tense situation. "What would you do if Nessie was with them Jake? Please tell me you understand?"

I tried not to let the desperation creep into my voice. But I needed someone to understand. I needed to know someone was on my side.

"I understand Leah, but I don't have to like it," he said.

Not exactly what I was hoping for but it would do.

"I don't like it either guys...but the alternative isn't better."

"What is the alternative Leah? Tell us please, stop holding out on us, just because you are not in our pack doesn't mean we are not friends," Embry said.

I took a deep breath. What I was about to say was not going to be easy. It was hard enough talking to Fred about, he thought I was a monster for being willing to kill Matthew, I can only wonder what my brothers will think.

"I was planning on killing Matthew."

Their eyes grew wide and their mouth's fell open. Normally it would be funny, but this was not normally.

"What?" they all shouted.

"That's what Fred said," I said.

"Leah how could you even think that?" Quil asked.

"That's fucked up Leah!" Jake said.

"Why would you kill him? After everything you have done for him," Seth said.

"Because I would rather he is dead then a monster. If Aro gets a hold of him then he would use every trick he has to turn him into a monster. I would rather see him dead then that happen. Don't you see? If I join the Volturi then I can keep an eye on Matthew, make sure Aro doesn't turn him into a monster. My love for him will protect him from Chelsea's power."

"Leah, what if they have wiped his memory?" Embry asked. "He won't be the Matthew you knew."

"I know, but all the more reason for me to join, so he can have some good influence on him," I said.

They said nothing, but their body language showed they were still angry and frustrated.

"I am sorry, Leah I am. Believe me I can understand what you are doing. But I cannot let you do this."

"You can't stop me Jake, alpha she-wolf remember?"

"I remember, you may be an alpha now, but I will not let you damn yourself over this. None of us will."

"I'm not leaving him to Aro Jake."

"We're not letting you join the Volturi."

"You can't stop me."

"Yes we can."

"Oh yeah? How" I asked.

Jake glared at me and I glared right back. I was not going to back down from this, but I could tell neither was he. An age old question popped up in my head then. What happens when an unstoppable force meets an unmovable object?

I was not going to back down from my decision. But Jake was not going to let me join, knowing him he already had a few ideas on how to stop me. I knew I had one more thing to worry about now. Or rather four more things.

Quil, Embry and especially Seth were giving me the same determined look Jake was giving me. They would all help Jake, they would all do whatever it took to keep me from joining the Volturi. A part of me truly appreciated their loyalty.

Another part cursed them for it.

Can't they see this is the only way? Can't they see it is better for me to be with Matthew? That it is the only way to keep him from being turned into a monster.

The door opened and the giant leech Felix stood there. Low growls erupted from the guys throats. I was starting to think I should have told Aro mind to mind instead of verbally. My request to join the Volturi seemed to increase their hostility for them even more than before, I was worried it would affect how we work together.

Felix grinned stupidly at us, like Emmett does. He was not bothered by the dirty looks or the growls. In fact they seemed to amuse him.

"Hey puppies, we're having a meeting in the back, you coming?"

"Yeah, we'll be there," I said getting up.

He moved to the side to allow me to pass. "Ladies first," he said giving me a smile and a wink.

I ignored him and headed for the back. I heard the others follow me; I could practically feel their gazes burning a hole in my head.

Things were spiraling out of control. My own pack was now my biggest obstacle. They would try to stop me, and I would have to be smart enough to stay one step ahead of them.

So many dangers, so many foes. It seemed like every time I turned my head someone new was popping up to prevent me from getting to Matthew.

I felt like the whole world was against me, it was a daunting task. But I will not stop, I will not give in. I will have him back no matter what.

* * *

Fred P.O.V

I sat in the library of the Volturi.

Since Leah left I had become so withdrawn from everyone. I actively used my power to keep the others away.

I was still in a state of shock that Leah had requested to join the Volturi. I know why she did it, in her eyes it was the only way she could be with him. The only way she did not have to kill him.

I had told her to find another way, to think of anything that would keep her from doing something so heinous. And she found a way. But I don't know what was worse, her killing Matthew or joining the Volturi.

God I wish I could travel back in time. I would have changed things so that we never lost Matthew that his sisters never found him that I had been there instead of moping over my own feelings for Leah.

Then we would still be home, still getting ready to move to Forks. I and Leah would probably still be confused and frustrated over our feelings for one another.

I was blaming myself for Leah's decision, I told her to find another way, and I pushed her to think of anything. I should have been more specific.

I had tried to leave, but Heidi's power kept me grounded to this place. Like my own power it could be very subtitle, you would not know you were tethered to this place until you tried to leave, they for some reason you found yourself unable to move. There was something about the place you were in that kept you in, something that attracted you so much you could not leave.

I wish I could leave and follow Leah and the others, how badly I wanted to find Matthew and take Leah and run. I cannot even begin to describe it. They were my family. The newborns had not been a family. We were pawns and most of the time they were killing one another, Bree was the only one I was close to in that group.

It was odd; my thoughts now were different then when I was drinking human blood. It was like I had become softer, more humane. I felt more guilt for not going after Bree when we parted ways. When you drink human blood it's like you're a colder, more practical being, but drinking animal blood gives you back some of your humanity. But when you are drinking human blood, it's like everything is numbed.

I heard soft feminine like footsteps in the hall outside. The door opened and and low and behold Heidi stepped in. She closed the door behind her and looked around, like she was looking for someone. A small smile curved her lips and the world seemed to narrow on just her.

She was really beautiful, like Rosalie level beautiful. She was a bit slimmer then Rose, her hair was slick mahogany. She did not need her power to draw in her prey. Her looks alone were enough to do the job.

"I know you are here Fred, come, speak with me, don't be shy," she said.

I lowered my shield and her eyes focused on me. "How did you know I was here?" I asked.

"I didn't, I just guessed. I could feel you were still here, I just didn't know where exactly. Your power made it tough to find you."

"Maybe you should have taken that as a hint," I said.

She smiled, not fazed at all by my rudeness. "Now don't be like that, I just came to talk."

She took a seat next to me; she looked over at the books I was reading. "Ah, the war with the Romanian coven."

"I figured since we were going to war with the survivors I should brush up on my history," I said.

She nodded. "Yes, it was a long war. They did not know what hit them; Aro was brilliant when he sought out the gifted of us. We took control from them centuries ago. But it wasn't until we got Jane and Alec where we ruined them."

"What do you mean?"

"Well until we came alone the Romanians were the largest coven around and they had a lower stander for who could join."

Meaning only those who were special.

"To be honest they really weren't well organized. But they did outnumber us. Although we did wrestle control from them it took us many years to hunt them down. But they were really good at defending themselves. The war lasted a long time, it wasn't until we acquired Jane and Alec we were finally able to take them down."

"Do you think we can take them down this time?" I asked her.

"Of course, they may have a bunch of hybrids, but we have grown in power since the war. And with the Cullens and those wolves helping us it will be a sure thing."

"Then why didn't Aro let me go?" I asked her.

"Well, Aro has the utmost faith in the team, and he would hate to see anything happen to you. You are a very talented man after all."

I just looked at her with a blank face.

"You know, now that both Leah and Matthew are joining us you should join as well, Aro knows you are close with them. Your talents would prove useful."

"Is that why you are here? Trying to butter me up?" I asked.

"I'm just saying. The kid and the girl will be with us, you might as well hop along for the ride, it has been a while since we had some new blood, plus it would be the first time we had a shape-shifter and a hybrid join."

"Leah will not be joining," I said firmly.

She smirked. "Leah you have a better chance of keeping from joining. Matthew on the other hand, you might as well forget about him."

A low growl escaped my mouth.

"I have never seen Aro have this much enthusiasm for someone with a power, not even that Alice girl. He will have him, a being who can make our entire powers increase twelve fold?" she clapped her hands together and even did a spin. "We all want him to join. Aro might be able to read minds without touching, Alec could strip senses in an instant and spread his power further, Jane could take down a whole coven herself! Face it; the only way you can be with him is if you join us."

"Never," I said.

"It's your only choice. Without your friends what will you have? Where will you go? You'll be alone again, left to wonder the world without anyone. Knowing once again you let down someone you-"

Something in me snapped. It had been a very long time since I lost my composure. Before I knew it I was out of my seat and had Heidi pinned to the wall by her throat. Her feet dangled in the air and her hands gripped my arm.

"Shut up!" I snarled at her.

She smiled and I was tempted to rip her pretty head off to make her stop smiling.

"What's wrong freaky Fred? Did I hit a nerve?"

"Leah and Matthew will not join you people! I will see to it!"

"How? You can't even leave the building unless I let you."

I smiled and I saw a thread of uncertainty cross that beautiful face. "You forget Heidi, we may have opposite powers, but if your power works on me, why can't mine work on you?"

I let my power out then; it flowed like a foul wind carrying the stench of repulsive things. Her face scrunched up with disgust, she bared her teeth and snarled and another thread of pleasure ran through me. Her hands gripped my arm tighter and she wiggled in my grip.

"You may keep me here Heidi, you may keep me attracted to you, but I can make you repulsed by me. Tell me, how long can you stand having me alone feeling like this?"

"Stop it!" she growled, her eyes were closed, unable to look at me.

"If I join Heidi you will have to live with this for all eternity. What do you think about me joining now? You better hope Leah and Matthew don't stay, because if they do I will, and I promise you, you will wish I hadn't."

I let her go and she stumbled away from me, gagging. She didn't look at me when next she spoke. "Don't get cocky boy, Aro is nowhere as interested in your power as he is in the hybrids. Why would he want a vampire who can project repulsion when he can have a hybrid that can project any emotion and make us stronger?"

"Go!" I said. I did more then use words, I amped up the revulsion and she left the room, covering her mouth as though she would be ill.

I watched her leave, slamming the door behind her. I went back to the desk and sat down. I lowered my power so I would not be noticed. I was looking at the picture that was drawn in one of the books, showing some of the Romanian coven before the fall.

I probably shouldn't have done that, but I had a load of stress right now. My happy life was crumbling to pieces and I was helpless to stop it, now here I am in a prison with no bars or guards, unable to save my family.

All I could do was pray to God everything turns out alright.

* * *

Jacob P.O.V

We were in the back compartment with the leech's.

I was not happy at the moment, not happy at all. I could tolerate Leah leaving the tribe to protect Matthew, but joining the Volturi was on a whole other level.

I cared for Leah, she was a good friend. We had become closer after the Volturi incident. Once I was over my angst phase and she was able to separate herself from Sam we were able to become better friends. As much as I loved her and wanted her to be happy I could not let her do this.

She may not be in my pack, but that was not going to stop me from stopping her. I could not let her ruin herself like this. I could sympathize. Really I could. But I would not return home without Leah.

I was being a hypocrite. Has it been Nessie being forced to join I would do anything to protect her, even join the bastards myself if I had to. I liked Matthew, he was a good kid. He was just caught up in his crazy fathers schemes, I know that. But as selfish as it sounds I will save her before him.

If I could I would save him, but as of now Leah was my number one priority. And I know the others feel the same way. Leah had opened up to all of us, showed us all the wonderful woman underneath all the pain and bitterness. We can not let her do this.

The one called Demetri was talking now. Telling us of our destination.

"The Romanian coven had many bases back in the day. One of them is Castle Poenari." he laid a map on the table and pointed to our destination on the map. "It was erected at the beginning of the thirteenth century by the rulers of Wallachia. The name and the rulers changed over the years until it was abandoned. Then in the fifteenth century seeing the potential the location of the castle had Vlad the impaler repaired it and made it one of his main fortresses. It was still used even after his death, the location made it hard to take even by the elements. However a portion was destroyed by a landslide, but repairs were made to it. The Romanians used the castle after Vlad's death and during the war they abandoned it. It is one of the few of their homes we did not destroy."

"How are you sure they are their?" I asked.

"It makes sense. Vladimir and Stefan visit the castle every so often. The castle has a reputation for being one of the most haunted places in the world. Also recently a great deal or renovations have been done to the castle. People from the village actually traveled there to fix the place. They say it is to preserve their piece of history. But we know that they have passed down stories and legends of the Romanian. I think they came to the villagers and promised immortality to a select few who served them well like how they did in the old days."

"So what they have the whole village under their thumb?" Quil asked.

Demetri nodded. "I believe so. Which is why we must be careful not to be seen. If the villagers see us, any of us they may report it to the Romanians and our cover will be blown."

"There has been a decrease in crime, I believe the villagers are offering their criminals as offering to the Romanians and their brood," Jane said. "They may have already turned some of the locals into vampires so they will be guarded."

"But with my gift we need not worry about being detected," Alec said with a smile.

"But they will be on alert. They know Matthew warned me," Leah said.

"It matters not. We have the advantage. Alec will keep us cloaked from their senses and we will invade the castle. We will finish the Romanians and slaughter their abominations," Jane said with a sick smile.

"Aro said this was a rescue mission, not an assassination," Leah said.

Jane gave her a glare. "If we can finish them all off and rescue your half-breed why not?"

"Because without Matthew, Joham can't do anything to your coven. It would be smarter to just take Matthew and run," I said.

Jane turned her glare to me and I screamed in pain. I remembered Edward once telling me what it was like to have Jane use her power on him. Next time I see him I will apologize because I thought it didn't sound so bad. But I had been a cocky fool.

It really did feel like I was burning on the inside, like there was a blazing fire burning me from the inside out. I could hear movement around me but I was in too much pain to be aware of what was going on. Growls, yells, hisses. That's all I heard.

Then the pain stopped. I was aware Of Seth by my side, he helped me up and Leah, Quil and Embry were having a standoff with the others.

"You seem to think you have a voice in matters here," Jane said calmly. "Understand this, the only reason you are here is because Aro seems to think there is some bond between your tramp and the abomination. But make no mistake; we are in charge, not you. When we tell you to do something you will do it, that's all dogs are good for after all. Taking orders."

"You're one to talk, you probably get a pat on the head by Aro when you do a good job," Leah sneered at her.

Leah fell to the floor next as Jane's gaze fell on her.

"If you cannot hold your tongue then I will hold it for you."

Alec placed a hand on his sister's shoulder. "Sister."

Jane glanced at him and Leah stopped writhing on the floor.

"The dogs have a point. Aro specifically told us not to kill anyone unless we had to. He told us to only retrieve the hybrid and be gone. Once we have him then the threat to the coven will be neutralized. Aro will not be pleased if we lose the boy because we let our blood lust get the best of us."

The warning in his voice seemed to sink into her head.

"Fine, we will grab the boy and be gone."

"Great, so now that we are thinking straight what is the plan? "Leah asked as Seth helped her up.

"The plane is simple; we will sneak up to the castle at night. Some of us will cause a distraction while the others go into the Castle to find the boy," Demetri said.

"How long before we get to this Castle?" I asked.

"We will depart at the next stop and run from there, we should arrive by nightfall."

We left them, having no need to discuss any further plans we went back to our compartment. "You guys okay?" Quil asked.

"Yeah, damn that bitch can really bring the pain. I can't imagine what it would be like stronger. No wonder Matthew lost his mind," Leah said.

"You shouldn't have provoked her Leah," Seth said chastising her.

"I had to Seth. I don't trust that bitch, I think she aims to kill Matthew," Leah said.

"What do you mean?"

We entered the compartment and she closed the door. "Before we left Edward warned me. He told me Jane is very territorial. In the Volturi the stronger your ability the higher up in the hierarchy you are. Since they joined Jane and her brother have been the highest ranked members. Edward told me Jane hates Alice more than anything because if she were to join Alice would be higher ranked then she and Aro would value Alice more. She's like a little kid trying to keep her dad's love and affection. Edward warned me that Jane might try and manipulate events so Matthew gets killed."

"But Aro ordered him be brought back," I said.

"I know, but if she can make it so something bad happens to him all the better for her. She knows that Matthew would be much higher ranked then her and he would be Aro's new golden child. The fact he is a hybrid hurts her ego even more. To her hybrids are inferior too vampires. The idea of taking orders from a hybrid...let's just say Jane might hinder our mission more than help."

* * *

At the back of the train

Jane stood outside the car. She watched the countryside fly past and was silent. She had her hood up so the sun would not hit her skin. She was silent deep in thought. The door behind her opened and she already knew who it was.

Only one would dare bother her while she was thinking.

"Sister, you must compose yourself," Alec said.

"I am composed brother," Jane said.

"You cannot fool me sister. Neither can you fool the others. They may not speak it out loud but they know why you wanted to attack Joham. Please be careful, I do not want a repeat of the Seattle incident."

"We've spent centuries as the most fear and prized of the guard brother. Now we are to be expected to bow down to a pathetic half-breed?" she asked.

"It is the way of the guard."

"No, I refuse to accept that. Not to a hybrid."

"But think, he can make us stronger."

"I don't care!" she snapped.

Alec sighed. He put his hands on her shoulder. "Jane, I know you have a grudge at him."

"He made me afraid Alec, so afraid I wondered that filthy jungle like a wild animal until you all found me. I was covered in muck and afraid of my own shadow, I can not forgive that humiliation."

"You don't have to forgive him. Just think, if the Cullen's have their hooks deep into him he won't last long. If Aro figures out you lost him one of the grandest powers in history, I fear he may kill even you in retribution my sister."

"I know," Jane said with a defeated sigh.

"Do not fret; we will still be Aro's most treasured sister. He will not just cast us aside, not after all these years."

They heard someone knock on the door inside the car. "That will be the attendant. Feeling hungry?"

"Always," Jane said with a smile.

* * *

Joham P.O.V

I was in a meeting with Vladimir and Stefan when Mia came rushing in. "Father! Danger approaches!"

"What danger Mia?" Stefan asked.

"I can smell it, danger is coming."

"How can you smell danger? I smell nothing," Vladimir said.

Her cheeks flushed. Mia was always a little sensitive about her gift and did not like it when people tried to act like it was not really a power.

"I am serious Vladimir, I smell danger coming."

"From where?" I asked.

"From Volterra."

"What? How is that possible? How could they know where to find us?" Stefan asked.

"The Cullens," I said, "Matthew contacted the she-wolf. The Cullens must have decided to inform the Volturi of our plan."

"But why?" Vladimir asked. "They should be happy for us to kill the Volturi."

"They must feel they have a claim to the boy. They did look after him for a while and they are allied with the she-wolf," Stefan said.

"We must evacuate!" Mia said. "We must move the children before they arrive!"

"Calm down Mia," I said gently.

"But father-"

"Mia, can you tell how many are coming?" I asked.

She closed her eyes and was still. She took a deep breath and a look of disgust crossed her face. "Seven vampires, and five of those shape-shifters."

"They brought the shape-shifters with them!" Vladimir said amazed.

"They must really want the boy back to have brought their guard dogs. You're son sure does draw people in Joham," Stefan said.

"Well seven vampires and five shape-shifters. I knew Aro wouldn't send his whole guard," I said.

"Still maybe we should go," Mia said.

"Doesn't matter Demetri will find us...tell me does one of these shape-shifters smell female?" I asked.

"Yes, it's the same scent as the woman in Canada."

I took a moment to think about this. This was an opportunity. It had potential.

"No, we stay," I said.

"Are you mad!" Vladimir said.

"This is a golden opportunity to test the children's abilities," I said. "We were going to face the whole Volturi soon anyway, what better way to test their skills then having them fight some of the Volturi."

"Yes, we kill some now so it will be easier when we invade Volterra," Stefan said with a nod of approval.

"But do not forget about the Cullens. They have powerful members. That girl alone could make things difficult for us with her shield," Vladimir said.

"True, but I doubt her shield can withstand Seraphina's power," I said. I turned to Mia. "Gather the others, alert the guards. We prepare for war."

"Yes father."

Mia turned and left. I turned back to the others. "Sergei!" I called.

One of the guards stepped forward. Sergei had been one of the first vampires we turned from the nearby village. He was also one of the only survivors. It was an old tradition the Romanians had for choosing their captains. First we create a batch of newborns, then they have them all battle to the death. The winner becomes the captain. They then make a new batch of newborns with the survivor of the first as the captain of the new breed.

Sergei was six foot one with pitch black hair and red eyes. The Romanians methods may be brutish and primitive but it works. Mikhail has done a wonderful job at keeping the newborns in line. He was cold and practical, he showed no mercy and followed every order to the letter. He was not gifted, but he did have a gift for leadership.

The newborns feared and respected him. A good combination.

"When the time comes the female wolf will undoubtedly seek to sneak into the castle to grab my son. But I would like you to not stop her."

Sergei cocked his head to the side. Confused. "Sir?"

"I wish to have words with this woman. I want you to instruct the others to not stop her from finding him. But by all means, do slaughter anyone else who tries to enter."

"Understood sir, I shall pass it along at once."

Sergei left leaving me alone with Vladimir and Stefan. "Why in the world would you let the she-wolf near him?" Stefan asked curiously.

"Like I said I would have words with her. Besides, it matters not, she has already lost him."

Leah P.O.V

Seth had his head on my lap; the guys had left, finding something to preoccupy their time.

I played with his hair, like how I did with Matthew when we were watching T.V or having a picnic in the woods. It made me miss him and also helped ease the pain of missing him at the same time.

I tried to keep an upbeat feeling, that soon he would be mine again and everything would be alright. But I still had this horrible feeling, like something bad had happened and I prayed to God and the spirits he was safe.

"You're thinking about him aren't you?" Seth asked.

"Yeah, how did you know?"

"You smell sad."

I smiled softly. "Just remembering all the times I did this with him. I'm thinking about how it will feel to hug him again, to hold him, to kiss him. But I am also trying to forget this foreboding feeling I have."

"You think they wiped his mind don't you?"

I took a deep breath. "I think. They had to. After what he did no way Joham was going to let him remember me."

Seth looked at me and smiled. "It will be okay Leah. Even if Joham wiped his memory of you, I don't think he could have erased everything. I mean, you had such a powerful impact on Matthew. Memories that powerful can't just be erased. Deep down I am sure he remembers you, you just have to remind him. Remember he did regain his old memories. Why can't he remember you?"

"You really think so?"

"I know so. Memories aren't just of the mind, they are also of the heart. Our minds may forget but our hearts always know, they always remember."

"Jesus Seth, you should write a romance novel," I laughed.

He smiled and we laughed together.

Then he got real serious and I knew our moment was over. "I won't let you join them Leah."

I sighed. "I know."

"I mean it. I love Matthew too, but I won't let you be their lap dog, not even for him."

"I know."

"But your still going to try and do it, your going to fight us all. I know you will. And well fight you right back."

"I know."

The compartment was silent except for the soft sounds of my fingers going through his hair. My eyelids became heavy and soon I was sleeping again.

* * *

_I was back in Volterra._

_It was dark and the sky was black with smoke. The once proud and beautiful city was in flames. Bodies were burning around me, some were human. They all were spread across the area, as if they had fallen asleep while they went about their business. I saw vampires burn to. The Volturi and the Cullen's. The fire quickly ate them up, or what was left of them. Parts of their body littered the ground, as the fire consumed them purple smoke rose in the air._

_My brothers were here burning as well. Quil's head was at on odd angle, Embry was covered in blood, Jake had a slit in his throat and Seth was already burning so bad I had no idea what killed him._

_I saw Nahuel nearby. His head was five feet from his body. Fred was close by, he had been ripped apart from the waist and both halves were on fire._

_I felt like I was trapped in hell. A hell where I was the only one left to burn._

_But then a pillar of fire receded to reveal them. I could not see them clearly, but I knew they were they hybrids. The bastard children of Joham's daughters. They were indifferent to the fire, to the horror they had created. They watched me with cold, yet evil eyes._

_At the front stood Joham, with Seraphina and Matthew. Matthew looked dead. Physically he was fine, but his eyes had the look only the dead had, empty, vacant._

" _My name is Joham, slayer of kings. Look upon my work ye mighty and despair," Joham said with a look of victory. He pushed Matthew forward gently. "Go on Matthew, finish the job."_

_Matthew walked forward he looked at me, his eyes blank and void. I walked forward to meet him. I had to take him as far away, he was all I had left now, we had to run away from Joham._

_I kneeled down in front of him. I grabbed his shoulders. "Matthew we have to run!"_

_He said nothing, just stared right through me, as if I didn't exist, as if the horror of our friends and family being dead didn't exist._

" _Matthew!"_

_His hands shot forward and he grabbed my throat._

" _Matthew!" I gasped._

_His hands squeezed my throat. I gripped his hands. I tried to pry his hands off me but he was to strong. I stared into his eyes and knew he was going to kill me._

" _Memories that powerful can't just be erased. Deep down I am sure he remembers you, you just have to remind him."_

_Seth's voice sounded through the air, even though he was burning. I felt like there was something important in those words. Some clue. But I did not know what._

_The world began to turn back and I knew I was about to die. But even though my friends, my family and the man I love are dead, I cannot help but feel a small tinge of happiness that I got to see Matthew, one last time._

* * *

 

I woke with a start.

"You okay sis?" Seth asked, "You're sweating bad."

"Yeah, I'm okay...it was just a dream. Just a dream."

I hope.

* * *

Edward P.O.V

"Leah cannot fight with us," Alice said.

"What? Why not?" Nahuel asked.

Alice had called a meeting. Everyone was here but Fred. I know from Heidi's thoughts he is in the library. The thoughts of the guard were tense. They were anticipating the coming battle, after the disappointment of our meeting a few years ago they wanted a good fight.

Many of them were anticipating having Matthew join to make their powers stronger. It was not just Aro who wanted him to join; they all did, with the exception of Jane of course. They were all dreaming of what they would be capable of with Matthew making them stronger.

"Leah has as much right to fight with us," Nahuel continued.

"Yes, she does," Carlisle agreed.

"I know. But...I remembered something...another vision."

She was doing her best not to think of it, she didn't want me to spoil it.

"What did you see?" Esme asked. She was worried about Alice. Everyone was. Nahuel was more concerned for Leah. He could tell from Alice's facial expression that whatever she was seeing was bad.

"Now remember, my visions change. But this is not the only vision I had. There has been many visions dealing with this one moment. But the majority of them all end in the same way...Leah dies."

She showed me the vision she spoke of.

* * *

_A huge battle was going on. Hybrids and vampires fought. But in the center of it all was Leah, Joham and Matthew. Seraphina stood behind Matthew who had his arms wrapped around Leah._

_Joham stood in front of her. He brought his hand back and slashed it across Leah's chest. Blood flew in an arc. Hitting both Leah and Matthew in the face. A look of pure shock crossed Leah's face. Then she smiled sadly. Angry and heart wrenching howls filled the air. The wolves saw what happened and they struggled to get to their fallen sister. But the hybrids were too many and stopped them._

_Lean leaned against Matthew, her head rested against his cheek. His eyes chilled me to the bone. I have seen that look in a person's eye before. They were the eyes of the dead. When the soul has fled the body and the heart stops beating. Matthew was alive, but it was just a shell. Matthew was gone._

_Leah didn't seem frightened; in fact a strange look of peace and acceptance crossed her face. "You're a good boy Matthew," she whispered._

_Matthew let Leah go and she fell face down on the ground. Seraphina took Matthew's hand and the three of them watched as blood pooled around her._

_Fred was calling her name, we all were, we tried to get to her but the fight was too intense._

" _It is time to finish this. Seraphina, cleanse the world in fire, build my kingdom from the ashes of the old world," Joham said._

" _Yes father."_

_They all walked towards us. Preparing to enter the fight. As they walked away Matthew never once stopped to look back, never once hesitated. But I could have sworn I heard a small sob._

* * *

 

"Is every vision like this?" I asked Alice in horror.

"Not all. There are a few where she survived. But they show her and Matthew as members as the Volturi."

"Surely there has to be more Alice," Bella said.

"Maybe. These are some of the visions I had years ago. I am sure there have been changes but without Matthew around to make my gift see past the blind spots I can't be sure."

"What should we do? Should we tell the wolves?" Tanya said.

"I am not sure that is a good idea. The wolves are already angry that Leah is willing to join the Volturi, if we tell them she may die who knows what they will do," I said.

"But we can't let them stay in the dark about it either," Esme said.

"True. Well let's hope that their mission is a success, if they fail we will tell them of the vision Alice remembered."

"We are not going to let the kid join them," Kate said, "I mean come on guys if they get their hands on him we are screwed."

"I agree. I know better than anyone what he is capable of. He would be Aro's greatest weapon," Eleazar said.

"But what can we do? If we try to run off with him Aro will stick his guard on us. The rulers have made the decision he is to join, we can't stop that."

"Fred could hide him," Carmen said.

"But he can't leave because of Heidi," Jasper said.

"But Bella could protect him with her shield," Emmett said.

"And then we all get killed for helping hide Matthew," Rose said.

"I am beginning to think maybe we should have just gone after him ourselves," Carlisle said.

"Guys, let's remember, my brother is a psychic-lens," Nahuel said. "When we bring him back he can just make the Volturi leave him alone and live with Leah, we are taking this way too seriously. Leah will bring him back, he will use his power to get the leaders to leave him alone, and it's as simple as that."

I did not contradict him. But I have doubt. I heard Leah's thoughts, I know of the foreboding feeling she has about Matthew. I do not doubt the connection between the two of them.

A part of me does not doubt Leah's instinct, another hopes she is wrong. Because I fear what it means of her instincts are correct.

 

**fusedtwilight: Next chapter Leah and Matthew are reunited and Joham is betrayed by one of his own. Will Leah make off with Matthew? Or will the reunion end in disaster? Please review.**

 


	28. Chapter 28

Focused Madness

Chapter 28

**Fusedtwilight:  Last chapter was an emotional ride. Leah found Matthew but found him still beyond her reach. Has she reached the breaking point?**

**And a new player enters the game. A mysterious and malevolent entity who not even Joham has knowledge of.**

 

Joham P.O.V

There were many tears as we cremated Rosemary's body.

We were also cremating the bodies of those who fell in the battle. We had lost twelve in total. Thirteen if you count…

Their mood had been joyful, though a bit subdued due to the loss of their kin. Soon it turned sorrowful. Peter, Steven and Gregory were affected the worst. I told them she had been killed by the Volturi. I did not tell them of her betrayal.

It was bad enough she was dead, but telling her sons she was a traitor would have made it even worse.

Early in the morning we held a funeral for her. Rosemary was dressed in the finest clothing and the children collected flowers to burn with their fallen aunt. Her sisters mourned her, they cried. Only Seraphina watched everything with a stoic expression.

Seraphina was cold like blue fire. I loved her for that. She had a stronger connection to her vampire instincts then her sisters did. I always favored her a bit more than her other siblings. Her power and her cold practical mind made her the perfect weapon.

Vladimir and Stefan comforted their sons as they wept over their mother's pyre.

They promised them revenge for their mother; they promised the Volturi would suffer for this.

Matthew stood by my side. He was as blank faced as he was since Rosemary erased his being. He made Seraphina look like an emotional person. He would be like this until he died. With Rosemary gone there was no way for him to regain his old self.

He would always be this empty shell, doing as I ordered.

I put my arm around his shoulders. "Soon Matthew, soon."

* * *

Seth P.O.V

We all sat in the car as the train headed for Volterra.

The vampires had call Aro and let him know the mission had failed. Judging from the looks on their faces they were not looking forward to returning to Volterra.

I could care less about those monsters, all I care about Leah.

Man, I thought she was bad when she lost Sam or when dad died. But she survived those trials, she came out with a few scars, but she healed. But this time, I think life finally hit her with something she can never recover from.

She said nothing since she cried that horrible cry. I could still hear it deep in my mind. I knew it would haunt us all until we died. Leah was so strong, but that wail had been pain filled and horrible. I never thought I would ever hear such a noise come from her mouth.

I knew now I had underestimated the power of the bond between her and him.

We all knew what must have happened. Felix and Alec filled us all in what happened. They heard the exchange between Leah and Rosemary.

Apparently Rosemary felt so bad about erasing her brother's very soul and turned on Joham. Joham killed her, his own daughter, and with her dead was any hope Leah had of getting Matthew back. It was no wonder why Leah was in such a black pit of despair.

When Aro finds out the situation he may very well change the capture on sight order to kill on sight. After all, if he can't control Matthew, why bother?

Even if Leah joins, now that Matthew is under Joham's thumb there is nothing she can do now.

She knows, it, we know it.

When we next meet Joham on the battlefield Matthew will have to be amongst those that fall.

My poor sister. She finally gets something wonderful in her life and it was taken away from her.

When that happens I don't know what we are going to do. If Matthew dies whatever hold on reality Leah has left will snap like a twig.

And I hate it because I have no idea how to stop it.

How do you save someone you know can only be saved by circumstances you can't control?

The answer is, you do the best you can.

* * *

Fred P.O.V

The mission had failed.

Whats worse Matthew has been stolen from us in the worse possible way.

Nahuel wept when he learned the news. His aunt took him to his room to comfort him.

I had my own comfort to be giving.

Leah and I sat on the bed. I held her against my chest. I stroked her hair and listened to her talk.

"He didn't even recognize me...he broke my wrist."

Her voice was full of sorrow. It hurt my heart to hear such pain come from her lips.

"His eys, they were empty Fred. Nothing, pure nothing. It's like he is a robot now. No memory, no emotion. He doesn't remember you, me, the Cullen's. Hell, he doesn't even remember who he is."

A small sob slipped from her mouth.

"Now with Rosemary dead...what are we going to do Fred?"

"We kill Joham for starters," I said.

"That sounds great," she said.

"Then we get Matthew and run."

"Matthew is dead," she said bitterly.

"No, he isn't. I say we kill Joham, take Matthew and run. We can take care of him. All we need to do is fill him with new memories right?"

She turned her head to look at me.

"He is empty right? Then we need to fill him with new memories. You and me. We'll get him back the old fashioned way."

"I don't know if that could work, he only obeys Joham now," she said.

"Then we wait until we can find a vampire who has a gift that can reverse what Joham did."

She sat up all of a sudden, more full of energy then I have seen her in a while.

"Holy shit Fred you are a genius!" she yelled.

She got up and took my hand. "Come on, we need to go pay those dicks a visit!" she said.

We ran outside the hall and made our way to the throne room. They were in a meeting when we barged in.

"Hold on! I have a solution!" Leah said.

"What is the meaning of this?" Caius angrily asked.

"Rosemary has kids!" Leah said.

No one said anything. Leah made an annoyed grunting sound.

"Look, Nessie's power is a reverse of what Bella and Edward can do right? So what if one of her son's has a reverse of her ability? She erases memories; one of them brings them back!"

I felt like I had been hit by a ton of bricks. Hope flared through my being.

"Please. We don't have time to look through Joham's army of abominations for a power that might not even exist," Caius said.

"I am afraid he has a point Leah. We won't exactly have time to look through and see who if any of the hybrids can restore his memory," Aro said.

"But Aro, think about it. In all your life have you ever seen a being with a power like Matthew's? I mean we are talking some serious potential here," Leah said.

"Yes, a being who could make your powers more powerful then what they are? Plus you can use him to find other special people you can turn into vampires. Just give us a chance to get him back. Me and Fred. We can do this. Let Fred off his leash and let us try and save him. You may never get another opportunity like this."

I smiled at Leah's cleverness. She knew Aro was greedy for power. I hoped his greed would be stronger than his practicality.

"What do you propose Leah?" Aro asked.

"We use Eleazar. He can check the hybrids and see if any of them are capable of what we need," she said.

"You forget, Eleazar can't just tell what a power can do exactly. He knows if a being is gifted and what general flavor it is, but he doesn't know exactly what they can do."

"But he should be able to tell if one of them has some kind of ability to help us right?"

"True."

"Then during the battle Eleazar, Fred and I will try and find the hybrid we need. Between Fred, Eleazar and myself we should be able to find the one's we need."

"You are forgetting one important detail. You would have to get close enough and capture one of the little brats. Also the boy is capable of turning off others power. So even if you used Fred's repulsion power won't affect him and he will keep it from affecting his sisters," Caius said looking at Leah like she was an idiot.

"Yes, that does present a problem," Aro said. "But Bella should be able to protect our warriors so our powers can still work on them. As long as we remain in her shield we will be protected from their powers and we can still use ours on them."

"What about the fire starter? The Cullen' woman's shield won't be able to stop that," Caius said.

"I am sure Jane can keep her immobilized," Aro said.

Jane smiled.

"The question we must ask ourselves is how do we act now? Do we meet them first or let them come to us?" Aro asked.

Alice shuddered. All eyes focused on her. "I don't think we will have to go to them...they are coming to us," she said.

* * *

Joham P.O.V

"And so it is decided. Today we will march onto Volterra," I said.

Vladimir and Stefan had savage bloodthirsty looks.

"Finally, after all these years, we will have our revenge!" Stefan said.

"Like the phoenix we will rise from the ashes. Better and stronger then ever, our comrades will be avenged, as will our children who died in the assault and Rosemary," Vladimir said.

"Vladimir, Stefan. I would like to thank you for everything you have done. Had you not sought me out and given me warning that the Volturi were coming I would be dead, as would my bloodline. With your help my family has grown and my children and grandchildren will rule the vampire world and the world that is too come."

"Believe me Joham, the pleasure was all ours," Stefan said.

He and Vladimir smirked. They had both slept with each of my daughters. Seraphina, Mia, Sarah, Hypnia...Rosemary. The girls were more then happy to share. As long as they got babies they did not care.

I took great pride in my girls as they bore children of their own. I had taught the new generation tap into their vampiric heritage and detach themselves from their human ancestry.

Otherwise I left it up to the girls to parent their children. They each raised their children in their own ways, along with Vladimir and Stefan, I did my best not to get involved in any disputes.

It was important they learn this lesson by themselves.

Hypnia walked into the room. "Father, can we talk?" she asked.

"Is everything alright love?" Stefan asked her.

"Yes, I just need father, it is important," she said.

"Excuse me gentlemen," I said.

I got up and followed her out of the hall.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Morphia," she said.

I followed her to Morphia's room. "For some time now she has been having these...disturbing dreams."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

We walked into her room, the curtains were drawn, blocking the sunlight. On the table next to her bed was a stack of papers. Hypnia picked some up and handed them to me.

They were drawings by Morphia, but they were all of the same thing. Darkness. Shadows. Shades. A single being in distorted shapes.

"They began a few weeks ago. I figured it was something she picked up on the other side. But now...she has been having nightmares. She hasn't been sleeping well the last week. When she wakes up she draws the same thing. This...person."

I could see why she said person. Morphia was an amazing drawer. But the drawings lack substance or shape. It was like she drew the outline of a person. Someone with long black hair, there was no face.

It didn't look horrifying. But looking at the picture I felt a strange sense of foreboding.

"Wake her," I said.

Hypnia gently shook Morphia's shoulders. Morphia woke with a large yawn. "Hello mother, hello grandfather," she said tiredly.

I saw what Hypnia meant by Morphia not getting enough sleep. There were small bruises around her eyes. Hybrids did not need to sleep, but they could still develop bruises around their eyes if they didn't sleep..

"Morphia, why do you draw these things?" I asked showing her the pictures.

She closed her eyes and shivered. "Because I dreamed them."

"But who is this?" I asked.

"I don't know. He came to me in my dreams. First I noticed him in the distance, watching me. He was really scary. Then he started to follow me around, I went from dream to dream but he followed me...then...he started to hurt me."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"He likes to strangle me, hit me, bite me. I beg him to stop but it seems to make him happy when I beg. I try to run but he always finds me and sometimes he changes into other scary things."

"Does he ever speak to you?" I asked.

She shook her head. "I don't even know if he knows how to speak. I don't know what he is. He isn't human, but the way he moves and acts is like a vampire stripped of all their humanity. And it is like he is made of shadows grandfather. I can hide from him sometimes but he always finds me."

"What does he look like?" I asked.

"Well his skin is dark as night, so is his hair, which is long and dread locked. He is very beautiful, but it is a terrible beauty, something dark and seductive that will lead you to death and his eyes are pure black. Literally, the iris the pupil, everything. I never look in those eyes if I can help it, for when I see them I see nothing. Like a black holes. It's like looking into evil."

"When was the last time you dreamed of him?" I asked.

"Two days ago...he tore me to pieces," she said with a shiver.

"Father, what does this mean?" Hypnia asked.

"I don't know," I said.

I looked at the picture Morphia had drawn. I wanted to believe it was just something her subconscious made up. But as I looked at the picture, something deep inside my being told me this was very serious. The longer I looked the photo the more intense the feeling of dread became.

"I will look into this. Try and keep awake, today we are marching in to Volterra, I want everyone at their best."

I took all the pictures with me. I left Hypnia alone with her daughter and went to find Sarah. With her gift she might be able to help.

I found her outside with her children. She had lost some in the Volturi attacked and had been keeping her remaining children close by her side.

"Sarah, we must talk alone," I said. I gave the children a pointed look and they left, Sarah looked a little distressed that they had left.

"What can you tell me about these pictures?" I asked her.

I showed her the pictures Morphia had drawn. She frowned when she saw them. "A little on the creepy side," she said.

"Use your gift," I said.

Sarah was a touch clairvoyant. It was similar to psychometry which allowed you to know information about the past of whatever is being touched. But Sarah can learn random facts about what she is touching. She might be able to tell who this individual is.

She took hold of it and her eyes got that glossy faraway look they get when her power is active.

"I see Morphia, she is drawing it. She is really afraid. She had a dream of a dark being and he frightens her. She wants the nightmares to go away, he hurts her in her dreams," she said.

"Can you tell me anything about the person?" I asked.

"No, this paper has nothing to do with him, only the small connection he has with Morphia, this is tied to her not him. Had it been him that drew it I could tell you more."

"Hmmm, maybe we just need to boost your power."

Matthew sat in the chair.

We were in my study and we had brought him to my room for our little experiment.

Sarah held the pictures in her hand. I was behind Matthew. I leaned down and whispered in his ear.

"Matthew, would you kindly make Sarah's power stronger?" I asked.

Matthew did not act like he heard me, but he did look at Sarah. She took a sharp breath and her body began to shake. Her eyes rolled into the back of her head and she fell to her knees.

"Sarah? What is it, what do you see?" I asked.

"Darkness, endless, never ending, bitter cold. I see thousands of lives lost to eternal night. I see the world drawing in shadow and blood. I see the sins of the past consuming the future."

"Enough Matthew," I said.

Sarah stopped shuddering. She had broken out in a sweat and was very pale. She threw the paper to the side and glared at it.

"What was that?" she asked.

"You tell me? What did you see?" I asked.

"I saw a demon from the pits of hell!" she said. "It wasn't like anything I ever saw, it was like he was made from the night time sky itself. He was killing people. Humans, vampires, animals. My God, how can he drink so much blood and still want more?"

"Where is he?" I asked.

"I don't know...somewhere dark, I think he is in some kind of prison. He has been trapped for a very long time. All he wants is to be free again, so he can hunt."

I bit my lip in frustration. What is this being? I have never heard of such a creature. Is it the Volturi? Are they somehow projecting this nightmare onto us?

"Father, maybe we should wait to invade," Sarah said.

"No, we cannot wait any longer," I said. "They know of us now, if we do not strike now then they will hunt us down."

"But this thing-"

"Will be dealt with in time, for right now we need to eliminate the Volturi who are the biggest and most pressing threat, then we will deal with our mystery shadow man. Speak to no one about this," I ordered.

"Yes father," she said.

She quickly left the room and I let out a growl. I grabbed one of the drawings and stared at the picture. The shadow was in a distorted shape, a mass of tentacles writhed around his body.

I glared at Matthew who was staring blankly at the wall.

I went up to him and held the drawing right to his face. "Something you should tell me Matthew? Another friend maybe?" I asked.

He did not respond.

I growled in frustration and ripped the drawing to pieces.

"Why couldn't you be a good boy Matthew? Why couldn't you do as you were told!"

Matthew did not flinch at the harsh tone in my voice.

"What did you hope to accomplish? Rosemary is dead because of you, because of your selfishness you made your sister turn on us. Did you think you could have a happy ending with her? With your precious Leah?"

I grabbed his shoulders and stared into his dead eyes.

"Well I promise you this son, she will die with the rest of them, I promise you, Leah Clearwater will burn with them all and it will be you that help make it happen. Consider it your just desserts."

I left the room. I heard many of the hybrids gathered in the garden. I made my way down there. I slammed open the door and they jumped in surprise. "Prepare yourselves, today we leave for Volterra!"

* * *

Matthew P.O.V

Excitement.

Blood lust.

Anticipation.

Tinge of fear.

Colors intermingle in the bodies of others.

This one is feeling them prepare.

This one is remembering the anger Joham felt.

This one is not understanding.

This one has no recollection of doing anything to deserve such wrath.

Nor does this one know what a Leah is.

This one is feeling weary.

This one decides to prepare body by engaging state of unconscious.

This one closes eyes.

This one sleeps.

_This one is in a barren wasteland._

_It is day._

_The wind is blowing hard. Just clouds form._

_This one is not alone._

_Blood lust._

_Desire to inflict pain._

_Desire to inflict suffering._

_Need for freedom._

_Oppression._

_Resentment._

_Rage._

_This one senses these from shadow in front of us._

_Shadow is black like ink. Sunlight make shadow sparkle. Shadow is looking like the star filled midnight sky._

_The shadow is tall and lanky, it's hair goes beyond its shoulders. The hair is in seven large clumps known as dread locks._

_The shadow is looking at this one._

_This one is feeling caution._

_This one feels all the negative colors starting to focus on this one._

_The shadow glares at this one._

_Shadow's eyes are pure black._

_Shadow lets out long hiss._

_From his chest a column of black tendrils grow._

_They sparkle like the rest of him in the sun._

_This one is detecting his desire for death._

_This one's death._

" _Come," it whispers, "let me kill you, let me rip...tear...destroy."_

_This one decides protection is necessary._

_This focuses red and black onto shadow. Red and black is fear._

_Tendrils stop._

_They shudder away from this one._

_Shadow lets out a screech like an animal._

_Shadow begins to fade._

" _I hate you!" it whispers._

" _I hate you! I wish you were dead! Why won't you let me kill you?"_

_The shadow was angry this one made him afraid. He was sad he could not kill this one._

_Shadow man goes away._

_This one decides sleep is too risky and wakes up._

* * *

 

This one is awake now.

This one decides to stay awake.

This one will wait for further orders.

This one remembers woman who came to kill Joham.

This one decides she must die.

Woman danger to Joham.

Joham must be protected.

That is why this one exists.

This one has no other purpose.

This one will wait.

Wait for orders.

Wait to run.

Wait to hunt.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

"Leah you are going to wear a hole in the floor," Seth said.

"Shut it," I said.

We were in my room. Fred, Nahuel, Huilen Jake and the pack, the Cullens and the Denali coven.

"We need to find out how to snag one of those little fuckers and get them to help out," I said.

"Assuming they have a power we need," Jake said.

"Can't Fred just use his power to hide you and him?" Bella asked.

Fred shook his head. "I could use my power to stun him for a moment. His power gives him a certain level of immunity to mine. It would not last long and he would incapacitate me long before we were able to get back."

"If you have me with you I could use my power to knock him out and we can just drag him back with us," Kate said.

"We still have to get close enough and once he realizes something is wrong he will react. Besides, we would still have an army of irate hybrids to worry about."

"What if...Leah, Eleazar and some of the others stay hidden somewhere and sneak up from behind," Rose said.

"Matthew would still sense us coming," Fred said.

"Could Bella protect us with her shield?" I asked.

Bella shook her head. "I can't project my shield that far and protect us all at the same time."

I felt like pulling my hair out in frustration. "Wait! What about Heidi?" Tanya said.

"What about her?" I asked.

"What if she uses her power on the hybrids to keep their attention focused on us, it could make it easier to sneak up on them," Tanya said.

"It could be possible," Eleazar said.

"But could Matthew be so drawn to Heidi he would be unable to notice you all as you come close?" Carlisle asked.

"If I go with them and project the right emotions yes," Jasper said. While Heidi draws their attention with her power, I will project the right emotions into them to help them focus on her and not us, added with Fred's repulsion power should give us the cover we need," Jasper said.

"But what if there is not a hybrid who can help?" Esme asked. "You will all be putting yourselves at risk."

"Even if we cannot find a hybrid who can help we can still use the opportunity to take out Joham and the Romanians," Jasper said with a smile. "While they are busy at the front we will take them from the rear. While they are confused and retaliating you all can get them from the front."

"Excuse me," Nahuel said.

He got up and made his exit. Everyone was looking confused, except Edward and Huilen.

"Please excuse him. Although he understands the necessity of the situation he still finds the idea of fighting his kin difficult," Huilen said.

"I will go talk to him," I said.

I left the room to go find Nahuel. He was outside the hall.

"Hey, you okay?" I asked.

"My brother has had his soul erased and I am planning on ways to kill my family, no I am not okay," he said.

"I am sorry Nahuel, I was in such a rush to figure out a way to save Matthew, I didn't stop to think how this would affect you," I said.

"Do not feel bad Leah, you are doing what you must. I fear I am not much use to you. As much I enjoy the thought of _him_ dying I do not want the others to die. They are my family Leah. It is not their fault they are like this. Joham has poisoned their minds, turned them into his pawns. I am glad Rosemary saw that before..."

A single tear rolled down his face.

"I remember meeting her when I first met my father. She was very polite. Quiet, but we enjoyed our time together," he said.

I took his hand in mine. "She was really brave. She realized in the end what Joham really is, she tried to help us."

"And he killed her! I swear I will avenge her!"

His hand gripped mine tight.

"Easy there," I said.

"Sorry," he said letting go of my hand.

The hand where he had been gripping me was the same one Matthew broke. It had already healed. Luckily I was to busy having my melt down to notice the pain when it had to be re-broken and splintered.

"Matthew did that," Nahuel said looking at the arm.

"Yeah,' I said.

"...Leah...I need you to promise me something."

"Anything?" I said.

"If you are unable to bring back Matthew's memories, if you learn beyond the shadow of the doubt we cannot return him to what he used to be...I want you to kill him."

I stared at him in shock. I remember having a similar talk with Fred about something like this.

"What?"

"I know...it is monstrous of me to ask it of you of all people. But that thing that stands by Joham is not Matthew, only his body. Matthew would never hurt you. To lose one's will and identity is a fate worse than death. He is like a zombie now. Everything we know as Matthew is gone. Once we kill Joham he will be a master-less slave and we both know Aro will see him claimed for his guard. I would rather see my brother dead and in peace then eternity as Aro's slave, his weapon."

I wrapped my hands around my arms.

"Hate to say it but I started preparing myself for the prospect of killing him a while ago...but Fred does not wish me to kill him."

"Of course he doesn't, I don't want you to kill him either Leah. But this is a mercy killing."

"I know...but Fred thinks if we hide him from Aro we can fill him with new memories. He thinks if we raise him like the old days...maybe we can help him regain his own will again."

"You agree with this?" Nahuel said with a raised brow.

"Look I got two sides. The part that wants to try it Fred's way and the more practical side that doesn't think it will work out," I said.

"Are you sure Fred is thinking with a sound mind Leah? That this idea isn't born from his love for you and a desire for a normal life?"

"Care to elaborate?" a voice said.

I jumped in the air and tensed. Nahuel was crouched, ready to spring and let out a hiss. Fred had appeared so suddenly beside me. I knew he had been using his power to hide himself from us.

It always unnerved me when he did that. It made me grateful we found him before Aro or some other crazy ass did and taught him to be an assassin. It would be so easy for him. He could take out a whole coven and they would not know he was there. Because they did not want to know, because he was projecting levels of repulsion at such a level their minds refused to acknowledge him.

Fred's face was a mask of blank but his eyes had such a level of cold intensity I was surprised he wasn't shooting ice.

"If you have something to say Nahuel say it."

Nahuel glared at him. "I appreciate your idea Fred, but we must be realistic. This wasn't a simple mind wipe Rosemary preformed. She went right to the roots of Matthew's being and plucked them out. It doesn't matter if you had a century too look after him. Matthew is nothing but an empty shell now."

"You don't know that," Fred said.

"I know my brother is dead. I will not deprive him of release from this hell."

"Being surrounded by loved ones isn't hell."

"But not knowing who they are or what love is, is a hell all on its own."

"You forget Matthew is a psychic-lens. Maybe some of our mental energy will rub off on him."

"I am sure you would like that. Some of your own essence imprinted onto his being, like having a son," Nahuel glowered.

"What do you mean?" Fred asked coldly.

"I mean I think you are using my brother to your advantage."

"What?" Fred and I said at the same time.

"Convenient for you isn't it Fred? The woman you love and Matthew there for a child to rear. Maybe you are so desperate for a normal life you are using Leah and Matthew to get just that."

This was all wrong. Nahuel was looking at Fred with aggressive and hateful eyes and I swear I saw something like jealousy running through his eyes. Maybe I was wrong in thinking Nahuel had given up on us.

"How dare you!" Fred growled. "I would never think to use Leah or Matthew in such a selfish way! We were a family before he was abducted and we will be a family after this!"

Fred smiled but it was a cruel spiteful smile. I knew that smile all too well.

"I think you are jealous Nahuel, I have your girl and your brother. I think you envy me for my life. While you run in the jungle with your aunt I am living your dream life."

They puffed their chests out and I could smell the testosterone. I knew I had to break this up. Things can get messy when it comes to men and pissing contests. But when those men are vampires things can get bloody and I do not want to watch Fred and Nahuel rip each other up.

Although the idea sounds good right now.

"Enough!" I said firmly.

I put myself between them both and placed a hand on their chests.

"Look we are all tense right now. But we need to get our shit together and stop fighting each other!" I said.

"I am fighting no one, I am merely stating the obvious," Nahuel said.

"You are a heartless bastard, like father like son," Fred said.

Nahuel bared his teeth and was about to spring. Fred tensed; he was not using his power. Which means he wants to fight.

"Nahuel!" a sharp voice called.

We all turned and saw Huilen and Edward standing outside in the hall. Huilen said something, I did not know what language it was. Nahuel glared at Fred and walked away to his room, his aunt following him.

"What the hell was that?" I asked Fred.

"I should be asking you the same thing; I thought you were past this?" Fred asked.

"Past what?" I asked.

"Wanting to kill Matthew."

"I told you I don't want to kill him Fred and I was...but you didn't see what they did to him, you didn't have to look in his eyes," I said sadly.

"Leah, Nahuel is a fool; he doesn't know the meaning of family!" Fred said.

"What is up with you? Why are you and he getting ready to tear each other apart?" I asked.

"It is Chelsea," Edward said.

I had forgotten Edward was there.

"She has been using her gift on us," Edward said.

"But I thought Bella has been keeping her shield up?" I asked.

"She has. But we wonder. Vampires do get bored you know."

"So why has she been targeting Fred and Nahuel?" I asked.

"Because Aro knows of all of us you three love Matthew the most and will do anything to keep him safe. Aro knows you may try to run with him. So, since he can't have Chelsea erode your bonds with him she has been eroding the bonds between you three. So far she has been unable to affect the bond between you and Fred. She can't affect your bond with Nahuel, it is stronger than affection, but not exactly love. So instead she has been targeting the boys. Dissolving any loyalty and sense of comradeship they have and forging ties of resentment and anger."

"But we are in Bella's shield now, shouldn't her power wear off?" Fred asked.

"She can do no further damage, but what is done, is done."

I cursed Aro. He knew Nahuel and Fred were my closest allies. Since he could not break my ties to them he is trying to make them fight one another. Bastard!

"I need to talk to Nahuel, I can't have you guys fighting one another. Not now," I said.

Fred said nothing. Just gave me the slightest nod and walked back into our room.

"Forgive Fred. Chelsea has woven a lot of tension between them. You must undo the damage she has done."

"What about everyone else?" I asked. "Has she done anything to you all?"

He shook his head. "She tried to make us not care for Matthew but she was unable. What we feel for Matthew is stronger then what she is able to erode."

I smiled at that.

I was glad she hadn't been able to affect any of the others. I already had my hands full with Fred and Nahuel.

I knocked on Nahuel's door. Huilen opened it and let me in. "I will rejoin the others," she said.

She left me and Nahuel alone.

Nahuel was standing and looking at the wall. I walked up to him and placed a hand on his shoulder. He did not react at all.

"Nahuel, I need you to snap out of it, Chelsea is screwing with you. Aro is trying to keep us from saving Matthew from him. I can't fight the Volturi and Joham without some help," I said.

"I know, I heard Edward," he said.

"Then you understand?"

"Yes, it helps me think more clearly about the situation with you and Fred," he said.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

He looked at me and I knew what he was going to say before he said it.

"I mean he was right...I am jealous because he has two things I want. Matthew and you."

Shit.

 

 

**Fusedtwilight: So creepy shadow guy and Nahuel and Fred are feuding over Leah. Only five more chapters to go before the end, next chapter Leah and Esme have some girl talk. Please review.**

 


	29. Chapter 29

Focused Madness

Chapter 29

**Fusedtwilight:** **Last chapter a creepy shadow guy showed up harassing Morphia and Matthew. We got to see how see's the world now that he has no sense of self, Alice and Aro reveal Leah might die if she fights and Nahuel revealed he is in love with Leah.**

**This chapter Leah and Esme have a talk and Joham prepares for war.**

 

Leah P.O.V

"Nahuel...what do you mean?" I asked.

"You know what I mean Leah," he said.

"...I thought we had this talk," I said.

I just got a huge bombshell. Two years ago Nahuel and I had slept together. It was supposed to be one of those _one night stand_ kind of deals.

But as Nahuel just told me, he has some feelings for me. Which sucks because I have something going on with Fred at the moment.

Holy crap, I have a love triangle!

"Nahuel-"

"I know, you love _him_. But Leah, I love you too. I have thought about you a lot these many years. I tried to tell myself it was just a simple crush. But...I think I am starting to love you Leah."

"Stop it Nahuel. Did you think maybe Chelsea has been making you love me more to mess with our alliance?" I asked.

He shook his head. "No Leah. Ever since you first fled with Matthew I thought of both of you. I get these feelings when I am around you. And I am sorry, I know you are just coming to terms with your feelings for him. I tried to be the better man and step aside and let you be with him...but Chelsea has opened my heart and broken any illusions I had that I could just step aside."

He took a step towards me, but I took a step back.

"Regardless of what I feel for you, please Leah. If we cannot return his memories we must kill Matthew. It is...humane. Leaving him in such a state because of our own inability to let him go. Is it right to let him spend all his days as an empty shell Leah? Think of what Aro will use him for. You know Aro will not stop unless he is his, or dead."

"Damn it Nahuel!"

"Leah, please. Despite what he thinks I am being reasonable about this. I appreciate his drive. But would you want to remain a vegetable for all your life?"

"No, but we should at least try!"

"How can you do it Leah? You can't run from the Volturi and raise him at the same time."

"Shut up!" I yelled at him.

He shut up.

"I can't talk about this, not now!" I headed for the door. My hand grabbed the handle but Nahuel began to speak again.

"If you won't do it then I will Leah."

I froze.

"I won't let him suffer any more then he has already. He is my brother and I love him. He deserves peace."

I opened the door and ran out. I slammed it shut. I leaned against the door and slid down. I could not escape the tears as they fell from my face. I felt so confused.

One side believed in Fred's idea that if we run with Matthew we can fill him with new memories and bring him back. He might not be the old Matthew, no he would be a new Matthew. A part of me regretted that, but as long as he was in my arms I would be glad.

The other side remembered his cold, dead eyes. Remembered how easily he broke my wrist. That part that Nahuel's idea was a good idea. That part believed Nahuel was right. Killing Matthew now would be an act of mercy.

I tried to imagine having no memory, no desire, no will, no ego. To be frozen and stagnate. Cold, empty, barren. The idea of Matthew going through that made my stomach want to heave.

I closed my eyes and tried to think about killing Matthew. Even if it was his empty shell I don't know if I could do it. All the memories we had. Such good, warm, heartfelt memories.

"Leah?"

I opened my eyes and saw the worried eyes of Esme.

"Come on dear, up we go."

She took my hands and helped me up.

"Come on, you need to get out of here. Let's get you something to eat," she said.

I complied and let her lead me down the hall. She wore a thin, light blue jacket with a scarf wrapped around her head. She wore a pair of opera gloves that were the same color of the jacket. She put on a pair of glasses and we continued to walk out.

She was right, I had to get away. Had to forget for a while. Forget that later today I will have to make a choice.

The sun was out but there were plenty of clouds covering it. It made it real easy to dodge sunlight. All we had to do was watch the sky and if any clouds moved we would move into the shadows to hide Esme's skin from sparkling.

It made it a little trickier getting to where we were going than normal.

We found a little place a mile from the Volturi building. It was one of the largest buildings in the city and it loomed above us, a grim reminder to me of what it was and what it held.

Like a giant stone cocoon that held untold horrors. No one ever spared it a glance. Ignorant as the Volturi wanted them to be.

I tried not to look at it in the distance as we sat down. I wished we could just keep going and never stop, leave all this madness behind us.

If only life was that easy.

A woman came and handed us menus. Of course she spoke Italian and the menu was also in Italian. Luckily Esme was able to translate everything for me. I ordered some pasta with sauce and some Pepsi. Esme ordered a glass of water and I knew it was going to be left un-drunk.

We sat in the back far away from the window where there were fewer people.

We waited for the food to come in a comfortable silence. Esme had taken off her scarf and glasses.

"Sorry it took so long. I don't think the Volturi would be forgiving if I risked exposure to the humans," she said.

"It keeps us from going back sooner," I said.

She smiled and it was warm and gentle.

"How are you doing Leah? Really?" she asked.

"Horrible. Just one blow after another," I said.

She said nothing. She knew what I meant. She reached her hand across the table and took my hand in hers.

"I know you are going through a tough time right now, Leah. But I want you to remember you are not alone. You have your friends, your family and us if you need. Do not think you have to shoulder this by yourself."

"Thanks...I could use some advice right now."

"Well if I may help, please tell me what you need."

I explained to her the situation. How I am torn between what to do with Matthew. How Fred want to try and rehabilitate him, how Nahuel wants to give him sweet, eternal peace. Then how Nahuel confessed he loved me and how he said if I didn't kill Matthew he would.

Her eyes were soft and full of pity and compassion. Normally, I hate pity but I have take blow after blow I need a shoulder to cry on.

"What am I to do Esme? Should I do what Fred suggests? Should I promise Nahuel to kill Matthew? A part of me is going one way and another is going the other. What should I do?"

She said nothing for a while. Then she spoke. Her sweet kind voice was filled with a wisdom that showed how truly old she was. Her face was a lie, showing only youth and beauty, but now her voice showed the truth and wisdom that only decades of life can give.

"I cannot tell you what to do Leah. This is something you alone must decide."

Her voice reminded me of Billy's when he was telling some ancient story of the tribe. Strong, wise, ancient.

"People think being a mother is simple, have a child, raise it and that is that. But not anyone can be a mother, Leah. Just because you have a child does not make you its mother and it does not need a blood tie either. You have to learn being a mother. That takes hard work, dedication, responsibility and sacrifice alone with some sweat, blood and tears. You may not be his biological mother. But you have earned that title. From the moment you took him and fled from your home and family you showed how far you were willing to go for him. Only you can decide his fate that is the right of all mothers. Sadly it is a fate many of us have to make."

"But...do I have to kill him? I can't even imagine it. How can I kill him knowing I had a choice to save him?"

A sad look crossed her face.

"Do you know my story? How I became a vampire?"

"Not really, I know Carlisle turned you because you were badly hurt."

"Yes, jumping off a cliff does tend to cause some serious injuries," she said.

"You tried to kill yourself?" I asked shocked.

She nodded.

"But why?"

Esme was such a happy and warm person, what could cause her to do such a thing?

"I was born in 1895 on the outskirts of Columbus, Ohio. I lived there for all my life. I was always doing as my parents told me. I let them tell me how to act, what to say, what to wear, how to eat, how to speak. I had no real independence. It really frustrated me, but I was eager to please them. They criticized me so much I was eager for even a little praise."

She got the faraway look in her eyes people get when they are thinking of another time.

"When I was sixteen I decided to do something adventurous. I climbed a tree."

"Why?"

"Because it was the most exciting thing I knew to do. I wanted to do something spontaneous, something to add a little excitement to my dull, safe, life. It was going good, until I fell and broke my leg. My parents were more angry then worried. They said it was unladylike to be climbing trees and what the neighbors would think if they saw and how shameful I would look with a broken leg. They took me to the hospital and I met Carlisle for the first time."

She smiled and there was a powerful warmth in her eyes.

"It is the one memory from my human life I remember so well. I was amazed at how handsome he was, so young, yet so smart and a doctor to boot! I made a fool of myself. Stuttering and blushing. I was also amazed at how strong he was. See while he was working on my leg my parents continued to chastise me. Finally Carlisle told them to leave or he would have them removed, he told them he would not stand there and let them speak to one of his patients like that. That was when I fell in love with him. Back in those days the younger generation always did what the older told them, we were never expected to tell them they were wrong. The looks on my parents faces was priceless. But they left and I was so grateful."

"Then what happened?"

"He left not to long after. But I never forgot that handsome doctor. As I got older I decided I wanted to be a school teacher. I was well educated and I loved children even then. But my parents pressured me to get married and as usual I gave into their wishes."

"You were married?"

"Yes. To a man called Charles Evenson." a tinge of sadness crept into her eyes and I knew the story was about to go downhill.

"He was young and handsome, very respectful to my parents. I didn't love him. But my parents said it was good for a woman to marry young. They told me my dreams of teaching was nonsense and I needed a man to support me. We married and I soon learned Charles had a darker side. He was one of those men who believed perfection had to be beaten into. I tried to go to my parents but they told me to keep quiet and try and be a good wife, if I was a good wife I wouldn't be beaten."

"But that's horrible! How could they say that, you were their daughter!"

"Things were different back then. In those days divorce was seen as shameful and a sin. There were women who went through their entire lives living with men who beat them, raped them and treated them like slaves, but they did nothing because they were to afraid or did not want the shame of being a divorced woman. Fearing it like a brand that would mark them for life."

"So what did you do?"

"Nothing, tried to please him as best I could, tried to be the best wife I could be. It was when he was drafted into the army for the First World War that I breathed in relief. While he was gone I got a job as a teacher and I was so happy. But then he returned in 1920. The war had changed him for the worse. It even got to the point where he forced himself on me in the bedroom."

I put a hand over my mouth in horror. The thought of Esme having to go through a hell like that in her own home by her own husband made my blood boil. I wanted to find the bastard wherever he was and kill him!

"It wasn't until I learned I was with child I decided to leave him."

Her fingers began to trace around the edge of her glass cup.

"It was not easy. I had to support myself and I was hiding from him and my parents because I knew if they found me they would send me back to him. When my son was born he caught a lung infection and died three days later. I could not provide the money needed for his medication. I could have contacted my parents or Charles. But then I thought 'Is that the life I want for him?' Did I want him to be raised by a monster? To be beaten and abused? The doctors had told me there was little possibility he would make it. But I refused to involve any of them and so my baby boy died."

The glass cracked and she stopped circling the edge with her finger.

"After he died I felt I had no reason to live. Being pregnant changes you Leah. It gave me strength and independence and helped me reevaluate my life. I realized my parents were only so in name. They did not care for me as a parent should. They did not care for my thoughts and feelings. All they cared about was having the daughter _they_ wanted and tried to squish out any parts of me they didn't like. I realized my whole life was spent in vain, trying to be what they wanted. I was not going to go back to Charles. How could I?"

"So...you..."

"Jumped off a cliff? Yes. It was funny, I kind of remember that day, it starts getting fuzzy, but I remember feeling...nothing. I felt empty. A strange kind of peace. I felt neither fear nor sorrow. Only the yearning for my life to end, to end the lie my parents had turned my life into. To go to a world where I could be with my baby and never see Charles again...so I jumped."

The waitress brought my pasta. Esme paused her story and waited until she left before she continued.

"When they found me I was so weak and so near death they wheeled me straight into the morgue. Carlisle who was working at the very same hospital that night heard my very faint heart beat. He took me from there and too his home. He turned me and the rest is history. But not a day goes by where I wonder _what if?_ What if I had been brave enough to go to my parents or Charles and gotten the money I needed to get the medicine my son needed? What if I had stayed just a little longer, waited until after I had given birth to run? Would my son be alive? Would we have been happy? Being a mother can be a heavy burden at times. I had a hard time being a vampire at first. Not just because of the blood lust. But because I felt so guilty for being alive while my baby was dead. But Carlisle and Edward helped me realize I had a chance at a new life. That I could start with a clean slate."

"Plus it helped you were living with the sexy doctor who fixed your leg and told your parents off," I said.

Esme smiled and winked at me.

"The point is that in the end only you can decide. As much as it pains me to say I am glad I didn't go back for help from my family. Charles was so unstable and after the war he became even so more. I am sure he would have harmed our son and tainted his heart with the same evil that lived in his own and the cycle would have continued. I made a choice and although it pained me I know I did the right thing. Leah, you are Matthew's mother and Fred and Nahuel's claim on him pales in comparison to yours. It is your choice to make Leah, yours and yours alone. Now eat your food before it gets cold."

I began to eat. The pasta was well cooked and the sauce was excellent.

I wonder if this is how Jake and Sam felt. I was still new to the whole alpha thing. All the choices I made affected me, but the choices they made affected so many other people.

When Sam made the decision to help the Cullens fight the newborns and the Volturi. When Jake left Sam to protect the Cullens from Sam and then had to worry about me and Seth when we joined.

Was this the pressure they felt when they had to make a big decision? Was this what it was like to know you had the fate of another person in your hands and if you made the wrong choice that life would disappear?

The only time I had felt something like this was when I had run off with Matthew. I have never truly been responsible for someone. Seth, when we were younger but he had grown into his own man and I had never had to make a life or death choice for him.

Even when I became Jake's beta I never had to make such a difficult choice.

I wonder how Sam and Jake did it? How they could make such difficult choices? Knowing that one little error could result in someone's death. It was maddening.

I finished eating and the waitress came back. She handed us the bill (which Esme paid for) and gave us two little balls of chocolate wrapped in tinfoil wrapping.

I held the chocolate in my hands and a feeling of sadness washed over me.

"Leah? What is wrong?" Esme asked.

"Matthew loves chocolate. It's the only human food he likes to eat," I said.

Her face fell. "I remember. He made such a fuss about everything except chocolate," she said.

I unwrapped the ball and popped it into my mouth. It began to quickly melt in my mouth because of my body temp. Thinking about Matthew and his love for chocolate made it taste even sweeter.

We got up and decided to head back.

"Thank you for this Esme, I really needed someone to talk to," I said.

"Any time dear," she said with a warm smile.

As we walked through Volterra, avoiding the sunlight when the clouds parted a question popped up in my mind I had to ask.

"Hey Esme. Your son...did you have a name picked out for him?"

I was a little afraid I was pushing it, but Esme just smiled.

"Oh yes, I already had a name for him. Edward. It was always a favorite of mine."

* * *

Joham P.O.V

"Today is a historic day," I said to the crowd.

We were all gathered.

Myself, Matthew, my daughters, the Romanians and their guards, and the hybrids.

"It is the natural order of all things. The weak are devoured by the strong, then the strong become weak and are devoured by something new and strong. It is how we evolve, how we adapt and continue. Many years ago I had a revelation. Human's so full of hubris and greed, claim to be made in their God's image. Well if that is true then God is flawed and imperfect. They over flow this world, destroying the planet on which they live in the name of progress and industry, having slain hundreds of natures beasts to fuel their own ambition.

"They start wars over money, land, or the need to fulfill their own blood lust. The last century they wracked a body count more then we vampires ever could have dreamed possible. If they are not stopped they will destroy themselves and our world, neither of which is acceptable. Now the Volturi would have us live in secret from these humans. They claim to be the best of our people; they claim to be the most powerful. Yet they hide in their castle of perdition, hiding in fear of humans, yet they call themselves the superior race.

"Tell me my children; if we are superior what do we have to fear?" I asked them.

"Nothing!" they all said.

"Why should we have to hide? Does the lion hide from the lamb? Does the snake fear the mouse? No! The Volturi are old and weak. They oppress our people, keeping them from reaching our full potential. Neither humans nor vampires are fit to rule. But you are!"

The hybrids cheered.

"You have all the strengths and none of the weaknesses of both species; you are truly made in God's image!"

They cheered, harder.

"Today, we will devour the Volturi, replacing them and the world they have created with a better world. Our world. A world which Matthew will help herald!"

Matthew said nothing, just continued to stare into nothing. But the others cheered for him.

"Tonight, when we burn their city to the ground remember you do this as vengeance. Remember your father's coven, their comrades who fell before the Volturi. Remember the brothers, the sisters and our beloved Rosemary who all fell under the attack of the Volturi last night!"

Snarls and angry growls. Anger and a desire for revenge leaked from their eyes.

"Now! March! Onward to Volterra! The Volturi! And our destiny!"

They all cheered and stomped their feet, causing a minor earth-quake.

I stepped aside and let Vladimir and Stefan speak, let them tell their children how proud they were of their children, how we would attack Volterra, what to expect.

I took Matthew's hand and led him back inside the castle to get him something to drink. We had already consumed the castle help. But I had something special for Matthew.

I took him to the dungeons where I had his snack ready.

I opened the door and led him in. The girl was against the wall, her face covered in dried tears.

She crawled away from us into the corner of the room. We had gotten her from the village. It was easy. She was an orphan with no family. She would not be missed. She begged me to let her go, she begged for us not to kill her.

"Matthew, would you kindly feed from her, I want you well fed for tonight," I said.

Matthew strode forward in no hurry. The girl cried harder and out her hands up in defense.

"Thirty years old, perfectly ripe. Virgin blood and minimal taints from sugar or cholesterol. You do spoil him."

Seraphina had followed us. She stood next to me and we watched as Matthew grabbed the girl and fed from her.

"That was a lovely speech father. You do a wonderful job of inspiring blood lust. I wonder if they would be so ready to kill for you if they knew you killed Rosemary?"

I looked at her sharply.

"I smelled your venom on her neck. Don't worry, I won't tell. So, she must have betrayed us for you to have to go and kill her."

"She was going to return Matthew's memory and tried to use her power on me," I said.

Seraphina whistled. "Wow. Never thought she had the spine to do that."

"Show some respect, she was your sister," I said.

"So. What does that mean to me?" she asked. "You didn't raise us to be a family. You taught us to be a well oiled machine. What ever doesn't work or breaks needs to be tossed. All for the greater good."

"You know I treasure you all in my own way, Seraphina."

She chuckled. "Father let's be real. I know you value me so much because of my power and because I am cold as blue fire. I know if it wasn't for my power I would be on the bottom of the food chain around here."

Matthew finished the girl and let her drop to the ground. Seraphina strode forward.

"I know my place in this world, what I was born to do. Rosemary forgot her purpose in this world. She was born to be a guardian, to protect us from Matthew, and Matthew from himself."

She held up her hand. She cocked her thumb back, folded her lower three fingers and pointed her index finger at Matthew's head. Her hand was in the shape of a gun.

"I never liked Matthew. I never liked how he could read us so easily, how he could make us feel what he wanted to feel. Even when he was in the womb the little bastard would make me too scared or confused to be around his mother. Plus you always said he was stronger than me and I knew he would be more important to you than me."

For one wild moment I thought she would set him on fire. But then she moved her hand so it was pointing at the dead girl and a stream of fire shot from her finger. The flames were white and with the help of the venom in the girl's body the fires made the body burn much faster than norm.

"He may be your prize jewel. But I never betrayed you father, I never questioned you, I never once thought about going against you. To me, that makes me better than him. I am your warrior. I clean up the mess and burn away what doesn't work and tonight it will be me that creates the new world. Not Matthew. Because let's face it, Matthew is dead."

She smiled at Matthew and it was cold and spiteful.

The room was filled with the smell of burning flesh and bones.

"Let's go, the others are waiting," I said.

Seraphina obeyed and stood next to me.

"Matthew come," I said.

Matthew followed us, his eyes empty. He licked at the blood that lay on the edge of his lip.

"Could have at least saved me some, you mindless little prick," Seraphina said.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

"They are coming," Alice said, "I can see the castle now. That means the hybrids have left."

"Can you track them?" Aro asked.

"Yes. There are so many of them. Like following a black shadow on a map."

We all were in the throne room now. All the guard, the wives even.

"Then we must leave at once to meet them!" Caius said.

"Let us not rush in without a plan now, Caius," Aro said.

"We already have a plan," I said.

"Oh?" Aro said.

"Me, Fred, Jasper and a few others will hide while the rest of you distract Joham. We will sneak up behind them and attack them from the rear. They won't see us coming. With Fred's repulsion and Jasper using his own gift to help make them ignore us," I said.

"What about the hybrids ability? How long before he senses you coming? "Caius asked.

"That's why you can use Heidi as well. Her power of attraction will help keep everyone focused on her and my gift plus Fred's will help us sneak up on them. We can get close enough to Joham to finish him. Without him the hybrids will have no real leader and you can attack from the front," Jasper said.

"Divide and conquer," Caius said.

"Yes, a strategy Alexander the great was famous for."

Caius smiled. "Who do you think it was that taught him such a strategy?"

"It will be risky Leah. Once you kill Joham the hybrids are sure to react quickly," Aro said.

"Yes, but Fred would use his power to hit them with such a powerful feeling of revulsion they could not help but run," I said.

Aro smiled at Fred. "Yes, Fred is certainly powerful enough to do such a thing. He has done it before."

I knew Aro was referring to when Fred lived with the Seattle newborns.

"It is awfully risky. But I am sure-"

"No!"

All heads turned towards Seth. He was the one that spoke.

"Leah cannot be in this fight!"

"Seth, I can do this," I said feeling annoyed.

Wasn't like this was the first time I did something dangerous and stupid.

"You don't understand Leah. Alice had a vision of you dying!"

"What?"

"It's true Leah. I remembered another vision. It showed you during the battle. Matthew had a hold of you and Joham killed you," Alice said.

"Ah yes, that one," Aro said.

"You knew?" I asked Aro.

"Of course, I read her mind, I know all the visions she forgot. It's what I do," Aro said with a shrug.

"Do I die?"

"There are a few where you die, less where you live. But you know how the future changes. I am sure you have chosen a path that doesn't wind up with you dead."

I glared over at Alice. "When were you going to tell me this?"

"I remembered right after you left," she said

"Leah, you can't fight, you're going to die," Seth said.

"Seth is right Leah. The plane is too risky already and there are too many visions where you die," Jake said.

"I am not going to stay here!" I said.

"But you die!"

"No, there is a possibility I could die," I said calmly.

"It is too great a risk Leah. You should stay here and let us handle things."

"I am more than capable of handling myself Seth," I said firmly.

"Will someone talk some sense into her!" Seth said.

"Leah, think about it. Alice saw Joham killing you, you are planning on sneaking up on Joham. You're at serious risk here. Matthew has proven he is capable of hurting you. More than once," Jake said.

My hand touched the scar on my arm where Matthew bit me all those years ago.

"He does not remember you Leah, he will not hesitate to kill you."

"Don't you think I know that!" I snapped.

Fred put his hand on my shoulder. I looked at him and his eyes had that look that said _calm down and think for a moment_.

It helped calm me down but I was still angry. I was mad at Aro for not mentioning this earlier when he read Alice's mind. I was mad at the Cullens for not telling me sooner, I was mad at my friends for trying to keep me on the sidelines .

"I am not going to stay behind. Matthew is my responsibility. I will take care of him."

Funny, I wasn't even sure what I meant by that.

"You can't go Leah," Seth said. He sounded like he was making it an order.

"And how are you going to stop me Seth?" I asked harshly.

"I am your brother!"

"And I am your sister, your older sister. I love you Seth but mind your own business. This does not concern you."

I hated to see the hurt look on his face. I hated having to be so harsh with him. But I had to make him see that I was not going to be stopped.

Still didn't stop me from feeling like a grade A bitch though.

Seth looked to Fred in desperation. "Fred please make her see sense."

Fred smiled softly. It was one of those smiles you give during a tense situation to try in some way to lighten things up, even though you feel distraught yourself. I could see it in his eyes. He didn't know. No one told him until now.

"What am I going to do Seth? Leah is her own woman. I know better than to tell her what to do."

I smiled at him. I saw Nahuel off to the side look away. I remembered he said he had feelings for me and I looked back to Seth.

"Seth I love you. But don't try and stop me, any of you," I said looking at the other wolves. "I have sacrificed and bled for Matthew. I will not stop, I will not falter, even in the face of death."

"Well that is a nice speech," Caius sneered. "But may I remind everyone there is an army of abominations marching across the land to kill us all!"

"Yes, yes," Aro said. "Leah will not stay, she is necessary in our plans. Now let us make haste. We leave in half an hour."

While everyone moved around to talk or make preparations I saw Seth leave the chamber.

I looked at Fred and he nodded in understanding.

I followed Seth's scent. It led to one of the many hallways the building had.

I found him standing alone. He looked at me angrily then looked away.

"You know you can't stay mad at me," I said.

"Watch me," he said.

"Seth I have to do this," I said.

"They saw you dying Leah," he said.

"They also mentioned a few visions where I live," I said.

"Yeah, as a member of the Volturi," he said bitterly.

"I have a lot of choices to make Seth. Tough decisions, but someone has to make them," I said.

"Leah this is madness, all of it."

"I know. But he needs me."

"He is dead Leah, or might as well be."

"But there might be a chance I can save him. Rosemary has three son's and one of them might have a power to do the opposite of what she does. I love him Seth, I can't not fight for him."

"And if you can't save him what then? We all know about what Nahuel asked you Leah."

"How did you find out?" I asked.

"Super wolf hearing remember?"

"It's what Nahuel thinks to be best. But as I am sure you know Fred had to put his words in too," I said.

"Yeah, also heard the part where Nahuel confessed he loved you."

"Fuuuck," I moaned.

If he heard it I know the vampires heard it as well.

"Man sis, a vampire and a hybrid fighting over you. You are turning into Bella," he said.

"Say that again and I will snap your neck," I growled.

He smiled, but then he got serious again. "But seriously Leah, you're not going to kill him are you?"

"I don't know Seth. Fred wants to raise him again, try and fill him with new and better memories. Start from scratch you know? Nahuel thinks Joham has taken away his ability to ever be normal again. I am leaning with Nahuel. I saw him face to face, he broke my wrist Seth. I want to try it Fred's way, but I don't want him to suffer anymore. I don't know what I should do."

Seth put his arm around my shoulders.

"That's why I have to do this Seth. Matthew's life hangs in the balance and I have to be there for him. So I will go to him, I will set aside all fear and I will not falter. This ends tonight and either Joham or I will die and I can promise it won't be me."

We hugged one another.

"I love you Leah, I am proud to be your brother."

"I love you to Seth," I said.

We went back to join the others. We had a few things to do before we left.

I know there was someone I wanted to talk to before we leave.

Mom.

 

**Fusedtwilight: The end is near everyone only four more chapter to go before the end! Next chapter the battle is finally here. Joham's coven faces off against the Volturi and our heroes. Will Leah be able to save Matthew? Who won't make it out alive? And will Alice's vision of Leah's death come true? Please review.**


	30. Chapter 30

Focused Madness

Chapter 30

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki . The time has come, the big battle is finally here. Will Leah save Matthew? Or will she pay the ultimate price?**

 

Leah P.O.V

Seth and I waited for Bella and Edward to finish with the phone. I know they called Nessie and Bella also called Charlie. This was going to be a big fight and everyone wanted to call someone they loved in case it would be the last time.

When they left I dialed home. I hoped mom was there. I needed to hear her voice.

Five rings and she finally picked up. "Hello?"

"Mom, it's me. And Seth," I said.

"Hey mom," Seth said into the phone.

"Seth! Leah! Please tell me you are coming home," she asked.

"Soon...tonight we are having the big showdown," I said.

She was quiet for a moment. "You're not sure if you will survive."

"We are just being cautious," I said.

She made a sound that was part sigh, part growl. "I hate this! Why can't I get a simple call. Hi mom I love you, not hi mom we might die, just thought we call and say hi."

"We know, Mom. Believe me we hate calls like this," I said.

"Tell me everything, I have to know. What has been going on since you got to Italy?"

We took turns telling her. We spared no detail.

"You said you would join the Volturi!" she screeched.

"It was the only way," I said.

"Leah they are evil! They almost killed us all and they kill humans! You would be disgraced! Banished from La Push forever!"

"I know. But what was I supposed to do mom? Let Aro get his creepy hands on Matthew? It would be like giving a nuke to a spoiled brat."

"Leah this is insane."

"Well let me finish, it gets better."

We told her about the mission, about me finding Matthew and Rosemary's sacrifice. We told her of our plan and how I faced a dilemma. I did not mention the issue with Fred and Nahuel. I don't think she could take it.

"Oh baby, I am so sorry you must go through this," she said. I could hear the compassion in her voice.

"What should I do Mom?" I asked.

"You are at the crossroads Leah. You face an impossible decision. I can't imagine having to make it myself. Honestly Leah...I don't know what to tell you. Part of me wants to tell you to take him and run, another part see's the wisdom in Nahuel's words...all I can tell you is to listen to your heart. Let it guide you Leah. Make the choice only a mother could make."

"That's what I am afraid to do," I said.

We talked for a little while longer. Then the time came when the call had to end.

"Mom, we have to go," I said.

"Already?" she asked.

"Yeah. We have a war to win," I said.

"Alright, but promise me you will look out for one another. And Leah, promise me that no matter what happens you will come back to me."

"I promise mom."

"Then I will pray for you, and I will pray you save Matthew Leah. Take care my babies, and come back to me safe."

The call ended and I wiped the tears from my eyes. Seth wrapped his arms around me, giving me a hug. "Don't worry Leah, we'll figure something out, we always do," he said.

I wanted to believe him. I really did.

* * *

Fred P.O.V

We would be leaving in fifteen minutes.

We would meet Joham and his coven half way. As far from the city as possible.

I sat in my room thinking. Thinking of ways to kill Joham, thinking of ways to protect Leah and Matthew. I felt so powerless, a feeling a hated a lot.

How was I going to save them? Between the Volturi and Joham, Alice's vision of Leah's death and even Leah herself.

What was I going to do? Let Leah and Matthew join the Volturi, no I will not let that happen. Nor will I let her kill him. Matthew is like a son to me. I raised him with Leah. I have as much right to decide his fate as her and I say he will live. I say they will both live. And we will be together again.

So I will kill Joham, and if need be I will kill Aro if need be. I will not let them ruin us, I will not lose my family.

I will stand tall and protect them with my life.

* * *

Joham P.O.V

We ran through the fields.

It was dark out, the shadows helped mask our presence. Not that we needed it, we moved to fast for the human eye to register.

Matthew ran on my right side and Seraphina ran on my left. We ran for Volterra. More than likely they would be waiting for us, but it mattered not. They would all burn tonight.

All these years of planning and waiting, all the sacrifices I have made have led me to this moment.

The Volturi thought they were so special, thought because they had powers they were better than the rest of us. But tonight they will learn different.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

Fred, Seth, Eleazar a few of the Volturi guards and myself staid hidden.

We hid in the trees and Fred kept us hidden from sight. It was dark out, a human would have trouble seeing. But for vampires it would be clear as day.

We waited for Joham and his group to show up. When they did we would sneak around them. I was in my wolf form as was Seth. He insisted he stay with me. I did not stop him. It did not matter if he was with me or the others, he would still be in danger.

We were miles from Volterra. Somewhere, wear we we would not be bothered.

I felt so impatient, I wanted them to hurry up and get here.

" _Be calm Leah, they are almost here," Jake said._

We waited and waited, and then finally they came.

They moved through the tree's, in formation, swift and graceful, just like the Volturi. They were in a triangular formation, like a giant arrow. At the front, leading the charge was Joham, followed by the Romanians. I saw Matthew, he stood next to Seraphina.

A soft whine escaped my mouth. His eyes were still blank and empty as before.

Fred put a hand on my head. I glanced up at him and saw he was staring at Matthew, too. The look on his face showed how disturbed he was to see our boy. To see nothing but his empty shell.

"Good evening Joham," Aro said the never ending smile on his face. As if nothing was wrong, like it was just another pleasant night. "I see you have brought your whole coven this fine night...and some old acquaintances."

His eyes looked over at the Romanians.

"Hello Aro, we meet for the first and last time," Joham said.

Joham then saw Nahuel and his eyes widened a little.

"Nahuel?"

"Hello Joham," Nahuel said contempt thick in his voice.

"Why are you here?" Joham asked.

"To finally rid the world of your evil and save my brother."

"Matthew needs no saving."

"Because you killed him!"

"He is not dead."

"Just as well," Nahuel said looking at Matthew with a pained look.

"You do not understand what you are doing my son. Join me and I will over look this and spare you and your aunt. I promise a place for you in the new world that is to come."

Joham spread his arms in a grand gesture. "Look at how much our family has grown. You have nephews and nieces now, join us."

"And be your pawn? No thanks." Nahuel looked at the other hybrids. "Can't you all see he is using you? Joham only cares about his dream. You are all pawns to him."

The hybrids didn't even flinch.

"And you care so much, seeing how you are the one who brought the Volturi on our doorstep all those years ago," Joham said, a note of anger in his voice.

"I was asked to witness for the Cullen's. There was a misunderstanding."

Misunderstanding my ass. They wanted to kill us.

"I told them about us so they would not kill the Cullen child. I asked they leave my sisters alone. You I told them to go ahead and finish."

"Well they did not listen, many of your sisters died because of your betrayal," Joham said.

A look of pain crossed Nahuel's face. His aunt placed a comforting hand on her nephew's shoulder.

"Huilen, I am surprised you allowed him to do this," Joham said.

Huilen glared at Joham. I remembered the story she told all those years ago of Nahuel's conception. It was very clear she had a grudge going on against him for what he did to her sister.

"Nahuel can make his own choices; he fights for a truly noble cause. He gets his goodness from his mother, obviously."

Ohhh, praise her nephew and jab at Joham. She may be a human eating leech but I like her a little more now.

"Carlisle!" Vladimir called.

Carlisle stepped forward. "Hello Vladimir, Stefan." he greeted politely.

"It is good to see you again. Although I must say I wish it was under better circumstances. Stefan and I bare you and your coven no ill will. In fact we grew quit found of you, even learned to respect you, despite your odd choice in food."

"We are here to help retrieve Matthew. He is a part of our family and we wish him well."

"So you are the leader of the coven of golden eyes?" Joham asked. "I owe you my thanks. You found my son and cared for him, sheltered him. I have no quarrel with you. I ask you please leave; I would hate to have to taint my gratitude by killing you. My world needs men like you, great thinkers and dreamers who can make our world a better place."

"Is that what you call your world?" Caius sneered. "A world full of aberrations?"

"Come on, let's go," Fred whispered.

We slowly began to move to the side, coming up behind the hybrids. Renata was one of the guards with us. She preferred to stay by her master's side, but he told her to go with us. Her power combined with his would help mask our presence.

Heidi was over with the others. Using her power to draw attention away from us. So far, it seemed to be working. All we had to do was get close enough to get to Joham.

Once we were close Fred would let of a wave of revulsion so powerful it would send the hybrids running. Then before he could run I would kill Joham. After that things would get tricky. I still had a choice to make concerning Matthew. Life or death.

Years ago I dreamed my father came to me in a field while I had a picnic with Matthew. For a while I thought it meant my decision to leave La Push to protect Matthew. Now I am wondering if he meant I had to chose whether to kill him or not.

Every instinct in my mind screamed at me to not do this. That it was suicidal.

"I would expect you to think that?" Joham said. "Nothing but an old relic who cannot change, who pathetically clings to the past."

"You are just a self-important pup who thinks he is more important then what he is. You think you can just change the world? Destroy what we have built and replace it with your own? I think not."

"Grandfather, something is wrong," one of the hybrids said.

We froze, fearing he was talking about us.

"My power is not working on them."

Our bodies slumped in an unspoken sigh. He was referring to Bella's shield is all.

"I see you are protecting the very same coven that tried to kill you Carlisle. May I ask why?" Joham asked.

"The Volturi and my coven have some bad blood. But they are important to keeping the stability of our worlds Joham. My daughter can see the future; she has seen visions of what will happen if you kill them. Without the Volturi the other nomads will go wild. It will be like the wars in the Mexican area only on a global scale. Now only in a few days it will take for humans to realize our existence."

"So, let them," Stefan said. "When we ruled we did not hide what we were and the humans knew their place."

"That was then. Humans have weapons now that should give you pause. Or have you forgotten about Hiroshima?" Aro said.

"A fearsome weapon, but how can a device threaten us? When we can just out run it."

"If there is one thing humans are good at it is finding ways to kill. They may not have our physical abilities but they make up for it with their science. It is better to hide in the shadows and pull the strings. Humans will never accept us. They persecute themselves, why would we be any different."

"Obedience can be forced."

"But my way is better," Joham said. "It will be slow, but the hybrids are our only answer. No more hiding, no more fights for territory like rabid beasts. They are better than either humans or vampires."

"Those words are blasphemy!" Caius roared.

"What right gives you the power to order us around?" Joham asked.

"No one gives us the right, we take it." Caius smiled.

We were right behind the hybrids and moving forward, we had to walk around them, they were to close together for us to move through them.

"Well tonight that right is taken from you. Tonight the Volturi will fall," Joham said.

"And as retribution for what you did to our castles we will burn your precious city to the ground," Vladimir said with a grin.

"But before we begin this epic battle for the future of the world...where is Leah?" Joham asked.

No one spoke. We continued to make our way forward. Joham was so close now.

"Leah has returned to her home," Carlisle said, "she could not bear to see him like this."

"Funny, I thought she was more dedicated then that."

Joham was right in front of me, now was my chance! I got ready to spring, I was going to enjoy ripping this mother fucker to pieces! Never before have I wanted someone dead this bad. He has dared to hurt me, my friends, my family and my pup. I will see him dead. I will make him dead!

Joham looked right at me and smiled.

"Hello Leah."

* * *

Fred P.O.V

Leah jumped at Joham and all hell broke loose.

I let loose my wave of revulsion and the hybrids all stepped back, hiss, growling and snarling in disgust.

"I knew you would be here!" Joham yelled. He had his hands on her jaws, keeping her from biting into him. . "Now, he will watch you die screaming!"

He pushed her jaws apart and she howled in pain

I ran forward and punched him right in the face, sending him back. Ten feet.

"That was for Matthew," I said.

"Don't just stand there, attack!" Caius roared.

The vampires all rushed forward and the hybrids met them head on. "Let's get him Leah," I said.

She nodded and we went to go for Joham but a wave of fire appeared in front of us, keeping us from reaching him. A woman with dark hair and icy blue eyes appeared with Matthew in hand. It must be Seraphina.

I looked at Matthew, the fire reflected in his eyes, the only thing that was reflected in them. So empty, so dull. Those wonderful brown eyes, once filled with warmth and a madness born of pain and innocence.

But now there is nothing there. Everything that I knew in him was gone, a feeling of despair washed over me.

"Matthew! Make our family strong, show the Volturi the might of the true race!" Joham roared.

Matthew did not move, but the hybrids moved more quick. It was like the blood lust and resolve in them was magnified. The Volturi tried using their power on the hybrids, but their powers had now been magnified, along with their need to kill.

There was one girl who looked like Seraphina. Her entire body burst into flame. For a wild moment I thought she spontaneously combusted. Bud her body did not burn, her cloths turned to ash, but she looked like the human torch. She grabbed one of the guards and before he could react she ripped his head off, the second the venom was exposed to her fire his body erupted in flame.

I saw Vladimir was fighting Alec, Stefan and Caius was going at it. There were so many hybrids, their powers magnified by Matthew's power. It did not matter if they were inexperienced now. Matthew had fused them with Joham's will and made them more powerful.

Alice and Jasper were fighting side by side. She could not see hybrids so she was not so good at fighting now. Jasper would not leave her side. Despite the lack of her power Alice was still quick on her feat. I couldn't tell if she was dancing or fighting.

Joham, Seraphina and Matthew were behind the wall of fire, watching. Waiting.

A hybrid rushed us. I hit him with a wave of revulsion stopping him in his tracks. I grabbed him and tossed him onto the ground.

"I am only going ask you this once. Did Rosemary have any children?" I asked the hybrid.

I pushed some revulsion into him, I knew the urge to run would be so strong, to get away from me he would answer. Being revolting can be useful.

"Yes," the hybrid spat, looking away from me.

"Who?"

"Peter, Steven and Gregory," he said.

"What can they do?"

"Peter can trap you inside a mental reality, Steven can make you relive your best or worst memories and Gregory can make you remember everything, every memory you have ever had."

Leah perked up. I saw a strong glimmer of hope in her eyes.

"Where are they?" I demanded.

"Dead. Peter was killed by one of those giant wolves, Steven was killed by the one with the evil eye and Gregory was killed By the brute with the yellow eyes."

I growled and threw him into the battle. A small group of guards tore into him, his screams were shrill and fear filled.

I turned to look at Leah. Her eyes were so...defeated.

"Don't worry Leah, we'll find another way," I said.

Leah looked at me, then to the flame that separated us from Matthew. I saw in her eyes a resolution. A sort of finality. Like she had decided to embrace the end.

"Leah?"

She looked at me and gave me a sad wolfish smile. I did not need to read her mind to know what she was going to do.

She rushed me, headbutting me with her head and sending me flying back. "Leah!" I screamed.

I was attacked by some hybrids, I used my power to make them back off. But before I could stop her Leah lept into the fire, to Joham, Seraphina and Matthew.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

Fred said we would figure out a way.

But there was nothing we could do. Our last hope of saving him was dead. The time had come for me to make a choice, so I was going to make it.

But that doesn't mean I was going to drag Fred with me.

I head butted him, sending him as far away as I could. My plan was crazy, impossible. But I had to try, it was my last hope. Before she died Rosemary told me that memories as powerful as Matthew's do not just die, she told me there was still hope. So if there was still a chance I could make him remember, I would just have to do it the old fashioned way.

I jumped through the fire, the smell of burning flesh and hair filled the air, once I passed through the wall I phased back into a human and rolled. I stood in front of them, naked and a bit burned, but they were quickly healing.

"How nice of you to join us Leah, saves me the trouble of hunting you down," Joham said.

I ignored him and looked at Matthew.

"Matthew, it's me, Leah," I said.

"Not this again," Joham said rolling his eyes.

"Remember when we first met?" I asked Matthew ignoring Joham. "I was naked, just like this. You had been chasing Seth around; you were trying to eat him. I did not like you when we first met. You were part vampire and very clingy. Remember how you asked me where my thing was? You told me I should see a doctor. Everyone thought it was funny except me. You called me Lee-Lee. I told you not to because that was Sam's nickname for me."

"Enough of this dribble!" Seraphina said. She raised a hand, getting ready to smite me.

"Shut the fuck up!" I yelled at her. "This is my last chance to bring him back and you will not ruin it!"

Joham put a hand on her shoulder. "Let her have one final good bye Seraphina."

I went back to talking to Matthew. Ignoring the battle, ignoring Fred calling my name, I continued.

"You were such a creepy little kid. So innocent and yet so feral. It was so disturbing how easily you could read people, how you stated the obvious, you had such little tact. You latched onto me like a little leech, I was so annoyed by you. Treating me like I was your lifeline. Always rushing to greet me and hugging me like a giant Boa constrictor. I remember when you were going to meet Nahuel for the first time, you were so scared and nervous. I remember how you were so happy when you found out he was your brother. Those were good days weren't they?

"How you wrestled with Emmett, cooked with Esme, ran from Alice when she tried to dress you up. You were like a little Quileute. Running around in shorts with no shirt. The best day we had was that day at the creek. You and Nessie were like little torpedos in the water. Of course there were downsides. Those nightmares you had and that stupid experiment to see if we could help you remember."

I showed him my arm, the one he scared. "Remember when you gave me this? God you pissed Sam off. He was ready to start a war with the Cullens. You know I should have been pissed at you too; you did try to kill me. But all I could think about was how bad you must be feeling. We got that all patched up and we had our moment. IT was around that time I became more affectionate with you. Then that mess with Emily happened and we ran for it. We found Fred and everything was so wonderful. Remember how I would read you Harry Potter before bed? God you cried so much when I read you the seventh book. You cried so much when Hedwig died, more so then the others. You said she was the most important because Harry could always rely on her. I remember how you used to say you would one day find Hogwarts and learn magic, God you were so cute.

"Our first Christmas was beautiful. We decorated the tree and made cookies and poured a glass of milk for Santa. You said you wanted to eat Rudolph. I made you that blanket with a wolf on it, you got me that necklace made from those pretty rocks. We got Fred a new pair of shoes. He was so surprised we got him something."

My eyes began to water with tears and they fell down my face.

"I know you remember something Matthew, because before they took you, you showed me how much you loved me, you used your power to show me how happy you were. And I don't care what vampire power was used on you, love like that cannot be washed away. And I just want you to know something Matthew...I love you...I love you so much. You are my precious little boy and I thank God I met you. I was in such a horrible place in my life and you saved me from it all. You showed me there was still good in the world, that there were such beautiful things to live for. You are a beautiful boy Matthew. You are sweet, kind, caring, sensitive, warm, and such a good boy and I love you. And no matter what happens tonight, no matter how this ends I will always love you."

I summoned every ounce of love I had in my being for him. I thought of all the trials we faced, all the good times, all the laughs and precious memories. Me holding him in my arms. Us hunting deer. Watching Fred teach him math and science. Watching him grow into such a fine young man. I took all that energy, all that love and I focused it on to him.

And I prayed some part of him would remember.

I was a mother and a good mother always shares her love with her child.

* * *

Matthew P.O.V

The female speaks.

Anger, blood lust, pain, fear, vengeance, retribution, agony, suffering, surrounds us.

This one stands with Joham and Seraphina.

This one protects Joham like this one was meant.

But the female. She speaks of things this one does not know. Things this one does not understand. Things that do not make sense.

But the female is a hurricane of soft pink. Soft pink.

Soft pink is love, and it is radiating from her like light from a sun. And it is all directed at this one.

Why?

The female is this one's enemy; she seeks the destruction of Joham.

So why is she feeling love for this one?

This one...this one...confused...this one...so much...pink...much...love.

Is this love?

Is this being mother's love?

Mother?

What is...mother?

This one looks at females arm, the one with the scar. This one is feeling...hollow...empty...remorseful.

That scar...the female...something...familiar...something...important.

But this love, so bright and warm. And all this one's.

This one's eyes are burning now, vision is becoming hazy. Something wet is sliding down face. This one touches wet object. It smells salty and is clear. It looks like female's tears.

Is this one crying? Why? Why does this one feel so happy? Yet so sad, like this one has lost something.

Who is this female?

What power does she hold over this one?

Why do I feel like...i should have soft pink for her too?

* * *

Leah P.O.V

I cried happily as he cried. The tears were dripping from his chin.

I looked at Joham with a victorious smile.

"You see that Joham, he is still alive, somewhere in there."

"Matthew, would you kindly restrain her," Joham said.

A wave of paralyzing fear hit me then. I was so scared, I could not move. Like when a mouse stays still, hoping the cat will not see it.

Matthew walked over to me and held me from behind. Despite him being the source of my fear, it felt so god damned good to feel the touch of his skin again.

Joham walked up to me, he was going to kill me, I could see it in his eyes.

Should I have killed Matthew? Should I have spared him?

I could never kill him. I could never spend the rest of my days raising a living corpse. A bitter reminder of what I lost.

It would seem Alice's vision would come true.

"The reign of the Volturi ends tonight Leah, your pathetic little speech has done nothing. He is still my son, still my creature."

He extended his fingers and brought his hand back, getting ready for the killing blow. "Just remember, you failed him Leah, in your last act in this world, despair...and DIE!"

He brought his hand across my chest. We werewolves are much more durable than humans, but our skin is nothing compared to that of a vampires. I could feel his nails and fingers, cold as ice, like the fingers of death ripping through flesh, muscle and bone.

And you want to know something funny?

It didn't even hurt...that is how bad it was.

Blood sprayed him in the face, it matched his eyes. The blood also hit me in the face and I know it hit Matthew as well.

I could hear people screaming now.

Nahuel.

The Cullens.

The Denali coven.

My brothers howling in pain.

Fred.

The world was starting to go dark. I was so scared. Seth and the others, what would happen to them? Would they survive and make it back to La Push?

Mom? What would she do after losing another daughter?

Would the Cullens and Denali coven survive? Would Edward and Bella be able to see Nessie again? Was she doomed to lose her parents and Jake?

Would the Volturi fall this night? Would the world be plunged into a new horrific age?

What of Nahuel? Would Joham kill another child tonight? Would he die knowing his father's evil would infect the world?

Would Fred lose another loved one? Would he wonder the earth, lost in pain and loss?

What of Matthew? What would Joham do once he no longer needed him?

Was I weak? Was I foolish? Was I naive? Have I condemned these fates to everyone?

Maybe, maybe not.

But even as I died and the world went to hell, I could not help but smile and be thankful.

Thankful that I got to see my boy one more time.

My time had come, I was at peace, ready to die. Ready to stop running, ready to just let go and accept my fate.

But before I go, I have to say one final thing.

"You're a good boy Matthew," I whispered.

Matthew let me go and I fell to the ground.

I never felt my body hit the ground.

* * *

Joham P.O.V

I watched as blood pooled under her body.

Blood covered my face and Matthew's. She was not dead, not yet. But her heart was beating very slowly right now.

I looked at Matthew. He was staring at her. Just...staring. His mouth was slightly open.

Why was he crying? Had something gone wrong? Had Rosemary left something behind?

The battle raged around us. The yellow eyes were trying to make their way to us, as was the wolves. It was time to end this war. Time to build my empire

"It "It is time to finish this. Seraphina, cleanse the world in fire, build my kingdom from the ashes of the old world," I said.

"Yes father," she said.

She took Matthew's hand and waved the fire away. We made our way to the fighting. My body was bursting with energy. Everything was falling into place now. With that bitch out of the way I can finally move on.

Adora's shadow will never haunt me again.

"My name is Joham, look upon my work ye mighty and despair!" I said.

For one glorious moment I thought I had won, that my day had come.

But then I heard the most disturbing sound in the world.

A sob, escaping from Matthew's lips.

* * *

Matthew P.O.V

This one does as ordered.

This one watches as all color and life leaves the female.

She told this one he was a good boy. Why?

Even in her dying moments the soft pink never left, never changed.

This one feels the blood on his face. Can smell it.

It is not smelling as appetizing as human blood though.

This one follows Joham and Seraphina as we prepare to kill our enemies.

But this one keeps on thinking of the female. This one is feeling...pain...in his chest...this one's heart is hurting...is it the blood? Is it poisonous.

Why is the female dying hurting this one so? Why? Why does this one want her to not be dead. Why is her being dead hurting this one?

The blood on this one's face wafts into this one's nose. This one feels something nostalgic from this smell, like this one has known this smell.

This one licks the blood from his lips. It tastes better than this one expected. It tastes...familiar...like...love...blood...Cullen...Quileute...wolf...Leah?

Then it happened. Like a dam breaking, like being crushed by tons and tons of water.

I remembered.

* * *

_I am seeing the Charlie person is cautious, even a little intimidated by mes, like he is somehow knowing me is being dangerous. He is having very tasty smelling blood. Me is thinking of eating hims, but he is saying he can help me find my daddy so me not eat him._

_He is taking me to place now, I am having fun. Me can run faster then metal car cop thing but it fun to ride in them._

_I giggle. "Look at us go! Wow...can you make it scream?" I am asking._

" _Scream?" he asks._

" _You know...whoooooooooooo." I imitate sound._

_He smiled and turn siren on. Me like that. I mimic the sound, having lots of fun, Charlie is feeling more relaxed with me now. Wow, you are fun. I was going to eat you but I am thinking you be better alive."_

" _Eat me? Why would you eat me?" he asked thinking me being joking._

" _Because I am getting thirsty silly, you're blood makes the thirst go away. I have been doing it before, before when men take me in their cars or the girls I get thirsty and bite them and they scream and holler then go quiet and cold and dead."_

_He is getting scared now. Me not like him scared. Me make him happy and fun and we make siren sounds for rest of drive._

* * *

 

_Me jumps up and walks cautiously to nice man. Caution. He not like me getting to close but me need to smell. Me circle him few times. Smelling him deeply. "Are you my daddy?" I ask him._

_He gets confused. "No."_

_I am disappointed now. Smell so familiar now, I was hoping I had finally found daddy, whoever he is being._

_I went to the nice beddy bed to sulk. I am sad now. I was hoping I find daddy. But once again no daddy, just Mr. nice man with nice yellow eyes and yellow hair._

" _Tell me young one, what is your name?" he asked._

" _Matthew," I say._

" _Matthew, what are you doing in Forks?" he asked._

" _Forks? Not Forks silly. Room with bed. I cannot be in forks, that sounds painful. Forks are pointy."_

" _No, I mean the area you are in, this town is called Forks," he said._

" _Oh...ohhhhhh!" realization hits me then. "I am sorry, I am so embarrassed now." I got up and his under the bed. "I think I Hide now until me not embarrassed anymores."_

_From under bed I see him step forward. Pale yellow now mixed with strong curiosity and worry. This worry different. Each emotion is different, millions and millions of different kinds of emotions, so many flavors that crisis, crosses and interconnects, some finer than the edge of my teeth._

_He being worried about me? I wonder why that is?_

_He bend down to speak with me. His face calm and relaxed. "You don't need to hide."_

" _But me embarrassed," I say._

" _Don't be, you just did not know where you are. Where are you from?" he ask._

" _Me not know," I say sadly. "Me remember nothing but the fire."_

" _Fire?"_

" _The pain, the never ending pain. Like my entire body is filled with lava. It hurt so bad."_

_I cringe in fear. The memory of the fire hurts. Makes me shiver. He senses me in fear and gives me a nice smile. "It is okay, you are safe now. You asked if I was you're father, why did you ask that? Do you not know him?"_

" _I do not remember. The fire is all me remember."_

" _What is the last thing you remember?"_

" _Waking up alone in the woods...all alone, afraid. Wondering by myself searching for daddy."_

" _How do you know you have a father if you do not remember him?"_

" _I not know. I just know I have a father and I must find him, it is important. He is my daddy, he will love me and protect me and keep me safe. I track his smell, there be others like you, only they have red eyes and they really mean to me. But I always scare them off. I make them so scared they scream and shout and run like scaredy cats."_

" _Wow, that is really special. Matthew, I know what you are. But the thing is no one else is supposed to know. See if they know what you are then they could figure out what I am and if that happens, bad things will happen. I want to take you to my house where I live with my family. We will look after you; we will try and help you find more about you."_

_Me like the sound of that._

_Me look at female wolfie in amazement._

_She is so pretty. Me make her calm so she not angry and hurt. Me also stare because me see her naked. Me finally see boobies._

" _Me never see girl naked before...where is your thing?" I ask._

_She had nothing between her legs. Me is wondering why not? Maybe she born different. Maybe she is being hurt._

_A wave of horrified embarrassment and annoyance washes over her and she quickly covers herself up._

_Her and boy wolfie talk now. Me keep staring at her. Her colors. She is so angry, bitter, sad and...lonely._

_Matthew is knowing what that like. He is being lonely too. Maybe we can be friends and not be lonely. Maybe we being best friends. Matthew like that. Something in Matthew feels drawn to her._

_Something in Matthew feels like he knows her from somewhere._

* * *

" _Neh, neh, Em-Em can't catch me!" I yell as me run from Em-Em._

_We be hunting for food. We find bears, Em-Em like Bears. He make fun of me and Nessie for being to small to fight the big scary bears. Me decide to play a trick on hims._

_Me make him scared of bear. We are all laughing as he climbs up a tree to get away from bear. To bad he forgot bears climb trees._

_We all laugh so hard. When me stop making him afraid he is realizing what me do and he chases after me's._

" _Just you wait shortie!" Em-em says as we run._

* * *

 

_Me and Ness-Ness are in the creek now._

_We are swimming, racing one another, seeing who can catch the most fish. Me cheat, me use power._

_Me having so much fun! Cullens, big brother Nahuel and his nice aunt, Leah and her friends are here, too. Me is seeing dark pink shining between Leah and big brother Nahuel. How nice would it be if they mates? Then we can be a real big happy family._

_Em-Em jumps in creek, making big tidal wave. Me and Ness-Ness giggle as we splashed with water and we splash him._

_Me is hating self now._

_Me hurt Leah! How can me hurt Leah!_

_Me not mean too. Me remember pain and me lash out, trying to make it stop. Me taste blood and me is seeing me hurt Leah. She start twitching and me watch as her aura fade._

_Wolves get mad then, they turn wolfie and things get tense. Me not care, me to worried about Leah though._

_Good thing big brother Nahuel there, he suck out venom and save Leah._

_Me so ashamed of Matthew. Es-Es and Car-Car try and tell me it not my fault, but it is. Leah is going to hate me so much when she wakes up. Me not want her to hate me._

* * *

 

" _Merry Christma,s Leah!" I say handing her, her gift._

_She opens it and me happy to see how pleased she is being by rock necklace I am making._

" _Matthew is looking for rocks to make you pretty necklace. You like?" I asked._

" _Yes, I do, thank you Matthew."_

_She hugs Matthew and Matthew hugs back._

_Matthew is liking Christmas._

_Fred-Fred was trying on the shoes me and Leah got him. He was surprised we got him something. A little ashamed too, all he got us was a card._

_We like card though. Leah says Christmas is not about gifts, it is about family and happiness. Me is both having family and happiness now._

_I stare at the face of my world._

_She looks so beautiful and peaceful. But her light is fading._

_Why do they not help her? Why does Joham not save her. She love him, why he not help her?_

_Someone save my world, my Adora, my mommy!_

* * *

 

_Leah is asleep now._

_Me is having bad dream and Leah let me sleep with her again._

_Me like sleeping with her, she so warm and makes me feel so safe. Me knows she protect me and keep me safe forever. Me love her lots. Me never let anything happen to her._

* * *

A sob escaped my lips

I remembered everything.

All the true memories of my life and the false one Rosemary made.

I was the Matthew who was the loyal son, I was the Matthew who was the lost boy, I was the Matthew who was a drone.

All the different Matthew's who ever existed have merged to become a new Matthew. A broken Matthew, a shattered Matthew.

I stopped walking, Seraphina and Joham stopped as well. They looked at me confused, but I do not care. A cold feeling gripped my heart.

"Leah?" I whispered, tears fell down my face like a river.

"Matthew? What is wrong?" Joham asked.

I ignored him.

I turned around and saw Leah, on the ground, blood pooling around her body, the same blood that reawakened me. And her light...was just about gone.

The horror, the wicked truth, the realization of what my life was and had come to was all before me with her.

So many people died for me. My mother, Rosemary who sacrificed herself in vain to do good by me and now I was about to lose one of the most important people in my life.

"LEEEEAAAAHHHHHH!" someone screamed with much horror and loss.

I would later realize it had been me who screamed.

 

**Fusedtwilight: That's right everyone Leah is dead! Some visions come true. Matthew remembers everything, but with Leah gone what is the point of remembering? Next chapter Matthew is full of rage and directs it all at Joham. With Leah dead who will be able to stop Matthew's rampage. And Leah may be gone but her story isn't over and creepy shadow guy makes a return.**

 


	31. Chapter 31

Focused Madness

Chapter 31

**Fusedtwilight:** **Last chapter Leah made the ultimate sacrifice and Matthew finally recovered his memories, only to realize the horror of his situation. Now as Leah dies in his arms a dark rage grips his soul and in his vengeance he unleashes hell on earth.**

**Leah may be gone but not out of the game. She takes a little trip and has a reunion with a loved one and the shadow man attempts to make sure she stays dead.**

 

 

Hate: Intense hostility and aversion usually deriving from fear, anger or sense of injury. Extreme dislike or antipathy.

Example: Matthew unleashes his hate onto Joham and his kin.

Matthew P.O.V

My world lay bleeding on the ground and it was all my fault.

The war raged around us. There were screams of pain and primal roars of triumph, I could hear people calling Leah's name. There was so much hate, and fear and blood loss and pain and loss and hurt and it was driving me CRAZY!

"STOOOOOP!" I screamed.

I sent out a wave of obedience. I did not care to make them feel peace; I wanted them to shut up so I gave them the need to obey my command.

The fighting stopped and all eyes turned to us, the wolves and Cullens were still feeling afraid for Leah. I tried to run to her, her light was slowly fading, I had to help her.

I went to run to her but someone grabbed my hand. I glared at who dared and saw it was Seraphina. "What do you think you are doing?" she asked, her voice cold as ice.

"Get the fuck off me you bitch!" I screamed.

I pulled my fist back and I hit her right in the face. Blood gushed from her face like fireworks. She screamed in pain and was propelled back by twenty feet, flying past Joham.

I went running back to Leah, my face flowed with tears, her light was so faint now.

"Leah! Oh God, Leah!" I cried. I kneeled in the pool of her blood. I rolled her over, not caring she was naked. Her entire front was covered in her own blood. Joham's slash went from her right shoulder down to her lower left rib. The lower top corner of her right breast and the lower bottom of her left breast had been cut and I could see her ribs on her right side.

Her body was trying to repair the damage, but she was losing blood too quickly. Leah told me that her people were very difficult to kill. But not impossible. You can never be to sure on what the limits of pseudo-immortality is until you test it out. Leah had joked she could survive being his by a truck or shot with a gun, but I guess even a shape-shifter was not immune to blood loss.

"Leah, please wake up, I beg of you, please don't leave me, I am so sorry!" I cried.

Her eyes opened, they were so beautiful. A beautiful shade of brown, so full of warmth and love. "Ma-Matthew? Is that my little boy?" she asked.

Her heart beat was slowing down; her light grew fainter with each heart beat. Her body was trying to close the wounds as was as it could, but it wasn't quick enough.

"It's me Leah, Matthew is here now," I said.

"Matthew...I-I-I never thought...see you again."

"Oh Leah, I am so sorry, forgive me," I said.

She smiled. "Stupid...boy...nothing to forgive. I'm just glad I go-go-got to se-see you one last time."

"Don't talk like that," I ordered. "You are going to be fine, we're going to run away again and find a new home. Let's go to England, remember? I wanted to go to England and meet Harry Potter," I said.

The memories of my foolish desire to hunt for a person who didn't even exist seemed so sweet now. Precious because they were happy memories.

She laughed. "Sorry...can't...feel...my body...Matthew...listen...forgive...don't...hate...be...good...boy."

She let out a final breath, her eyes closed, her heart stopped beating and her light finally gave out.

"Leah?" I whispered. I gave her a small shake. "Leah, come on, you're looking silly sleeping naked in front of everyone...Leah wake up!"

It was pointless, I knew she was gone. But I didn't want to acknowledge it. I couldn't. She can't be gone, my world. My sweet world was once again taken from me.

How many people have died for me? My mother, Rosemary, now Leah. My sweet, lovely, lonely Leah. Who sacrificed so much for me. Who has done nothing but love and protect me. Now she is gone. Gone like mother, like Rosemary, who betrayed the family all to bring me happiness. I remember her sacrifice, how she asked Leah to tell me she was sorry.

Is this what my life is? Am I doomed to live a life where I lose those closest to my heart? How many must die because of me? Fred, Nahuel, the Cullens, the Wolves? They all have suffered so much because of me.

The sound of wolves howling could be heard. I sensed their pain and suffering so well. They sent their sister off with a mournful serenade.

Seth's pain was the worst. A dark chilling wind of pain so deep I felt as if my skin was being cut by an icy rain. I had to wonder what the rest of her friends and family's pain be like when they learned? Her mother loosing a daughter, her wolf brothers loosing a sister wolf, even Sam and Emily who I knew cared much for her. They would feel such pain and suffering because of me.

"No...come back Leah!"

I focused all my power and will onto her. I used thousands of different emotions, wrapped different strands of mental energy around her. I used every trick I knew to lure her back, to find some spark left in her I could pull back.

But there was nothing.

My world was gone.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

The sound of flowing water sounded softly in my ears.

My feet felt cool, I could feel the water flowing over it. I opened my eyes and saw the blue sky. The clouds were thick and every once in a while would block the sun. I could smell the creek, I could smell the earth, feel it under my skin. I could hear the fish swimming in the creek and the birds and other animals in the trees.

I heard the sound of the line being cast out into the water, heard the 'plop' of the bait hitting its surface. "About time sleepy head," a cheerful voice said.

I froze. That voice was not just cheerful, it was disturbingly familiar. I looked to the side. He stood there, wearing his fishing gear. Looking so lively, despite the fact I had watched him die myself.

He smiled warmly at me, the wrinkles in his which he gained from naturally smiling all his life thinned out. Seth had inherited that smile from him. I knew when he got older he would look just like him.

"Come on Leah, we have a lot to talk about, and so little time to do it I am afraid."

"Dad?" I asked.

"That's right."

"But...if I am with you then...am I-"

"Dead? Afraid so."

"...Oh fuck me."

* * *

Matthew P.O.V

Nothing, no light, no heart beat. All I held in my arms now was a corpse. But I held her for dear life.

"Leah...Leah...Leah." I moaned, I sounded like a little boy. In some ways I was one.

The air was quiet except for my moans and the wolves howling.

"Please come back, please," I begged.

She felt so light in my hands. Was she always this light? Or had death made her like air. Does a soul have weight?

I felt him walking up to me, the architect of all my woe. My father, Leah's murder Joham.

"She is gone Matthew. Put her down and let us finish what we started," he said.

"Get...away...from...me!" I snarled.

My body began to shake. The world began to turn red, I glared at Joham and he took five steps back, looking fearful. He was a little fearful. I smiled. I liked that fear. I wanted him afraid. I wanted him to fear me. For once I wanted to make him know fear.

My blood was boiling with a new emotion. Something I have never felt in my life. For the first time, I learned to hate.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

"Language Leah, just because you are dead doesn't mean you should forget your manners," dad said sternly.

I stood up in the creek. I was wearing a pair of cut off jeans and a big oversized blue shirt. "But I can't be dead," I said.

"What do you last remember?" dad asked.

"I remember...oh God."

Joham, the battle, Matthew. I remember it all now.

I fell to my knees, causing a big splash.

"Easy now, you'll scare the fish away," dad said.

"But I can't be dead, what about mom and Seth? What about Matthew, who is going to take care of him? Their all going to be so mean to him, their going to hurt him," I said crying.

Dad set his fishing rod down and kneeled in front of me. "Come on Leah, dry your face."

"But I failed," I cried. "I failed Matthew."

"Matthew can take care of himself Leah, believe me. Joham made a terrible mistake and is about to suffer for it," dad said.

"But what am I going to do? How can I die knowing I failed?"

"Why do I keep on hearing this word? Failed? You didn't fail Leah. You gave it your all, just like a good mother should. I am proud of you. Now come up out of the creek, we have much to discuss."

I took his hand and stood up. "Where are we?" I asked looking around. "It looks like home."

"It is home," dad said.

"But this isn't La Push?" I said.

"Isn't it?"

"But...shouldn't there be like, I don't know. Clouds and harps?" I asked.

"What makes you think this isn't Heaven?" he asked.

Just then a bunch of fish swam from the wonder. Literally, they broke through the surface of the water and swam through the air. They swam/floated towards us. Dozens of them, swam/floated around me and dad. I stared at them in wonder, I went to touch one but they all swam/floated quickly in different directions.

"A place can have more then one name Leah. And why should paradise be just clouds and angels?" dad asked. "Our ancestors called it the spirit world, but they only understood a fraction of its existence."

"Does everyone come here?" I asked.

"Of course," he said.

"What about the bad ones?"

"Oh they come here too. But it's different for them."

"So there is a hell?"

"Yes, it's here as well."

"But-"

"Leah, I just told you that a place can have more then one name. But the experience all depends on who is observing it. For you and me we see our home. Others might see something more grand or modern. We make our own heaven or hell Leah. This is true even here."

"So what now?" I asked.

"Now we talk, we have so much to catch up on. Come one." he led me back onto land. I saw under a tree he had laid down a picnic blanket with a basket I was sure had food in it. We sat down and he opened the basket, bringing out some sandwiches.

"So how has your mother and brother been? What has been going on in La Push since I kicked the bucket?"

"Well...Seth is doing great. He still is a little ray of sunshine. Mom is...doing great," I said. I almost let it slip she was dating Charlie. I didn't know how dad would take that so I said nothing about it.

He just smiled. "I believe you left out the part where she and Charlie are going out."

I stared at him in shock.

"You know?"

"Leah, I may not physically be around, but I do keep up to date with current events."

"Then why did you ask me how things were if you already know?" I asked.

"Can't a dead man have a nice conversation with his daughter?" he asked.

"So you know? Everything?" I asked.

His face got a little more somber, a little more serious. "I know everything Leah. I know how much you have suffered. I know you have done many things good and bad. I know you have come a long way from the broken girl you once were."

"Dad...I am so sorry...I didn't mean to kill you. Please forgive me," I said. I had been trying to hold it back, but the words I have so craved to say to him just came out.

"I admit your transformation was a surprise. Seth I had been expecting. He had shown all the signs so I was not too surprised when he phased. But you? We have never heard of a female before. To see my baby girl phase." he shook his head. "But it was not that that killed me. The shock helped but it was the realization of what your transformation meant."

"Sam," I said.

"Yes...Sam," he said softly.

"You knew why Sam left me for her. Of course you did. That's why you were so opposed to us being together when he disappeared. You knew he might imprint," I said.

"Yes I did," he sighed. "I liked him, he was a good boy. But when Old Quil told us he had phased I knew there was possible disaster. It was not his fault, he can not help being what he is, and none of us can. But I feared what it would do to you should he imprint. That's why I was always telling you to leave him. You thought I was being over protective, that believed the stories of him being involved in drugs and such nonsense. My fear was made worse when it was Emily, who was like a sister to you was imprinted by him."

"Seems so long ago now," I said.

"Yes, it does."

"Why didn't you tell me?" I demanded, feeling some anger.

"Leah, if I told you the love of your life was a werewolf and had imprinted on your cousin would you have believed me?" he asked with a small smile.

"I would have screamed at you," I said with a small smile of my own.

"Exactly, besides, I was forbidden by our laws. Although I was tempted to break the law, if only to give you some little relief from your pain. I knew when you phased you would be in his mind, you would finally know the truth, but you would be forced to listen to his every loving thought of her. Plus I knew becoming a protector would cause you to make many sacrifices, all your dreams would be destroyed. The pain I felt for you was what did me in."

"I remember when you saw me as a wolf, you clutched your heart and a tear escaped your eye and you said 'Leah? No, not you, why?'"

"Do not feel bad Leah, I was dying. I was an old man and it was my time, it would have happened sooner or later," he said.

"That's what everyone told me, and I told them to go to hell," I said.

"I know, you did become a huge pain in the ass for everyone," he said with a chuckle.

"I know. But I was so mad. Mad at you for dying, mad at Sam and Emily, mad at myself and mad at life."

"Anger can change us Leah, turn us into something ugly. I am just glad you were able to move on before you were transformed into something less," he said.

"I had a lot of help."

"Indeed."

* * *

Matthew P.O.V

I gently laid her on the ground. My eyes never left Joham's. My whole body shook in rage. Red was beginning to cloud my vision.

"You did this!" I yelled.

"She was in my way," Joham said.

"She was trying to save me!"

"I am your father!"

"No your not! You don't get the right to use that word! You killed your own daughter!"

I sensed shock and surprise from the hybrids. I remembered he told them the Volturi killed her to help fuel their hate.

"That's right, Joham killed Rosemary! Not the Volturi!" I told everyone.

"Rosemary betrayed us!" Joham told them. "She was going to hand him over to our enemies!"

"It's true, Rosemary was going to help save me. She saw how happy I was with Leah, she felt guilt for taking me away from that. She finally saw the truth. Joham doesn't care. Not about any of us, all we are is a means to an end. Puppets to be used!" I said.

"Change does not come with out sacrifice," Joham said.

"Change? The world doesn't need you to change it Joham. You're just a self-important little man who wants to play God. Your nothing special, history is full of ego-maniacs like you!"

I gripped my head. I had such a headache. I was still in shock from Leah's death. But my head was still simmering with all the memories. My real memories, and my fake. Everything I had actually experienced and everything Joham had pumped into my head. Part of me wanted to be a good son and please him, a part of me wanted to obey. Another part wanted to kill him, to make him suffer as I have suffered.

"How can you do this to us Joham, look what you have done to us!" I turned to look at all the hybrids. "Look at yourselves. Is this the world you want to help create? A world built on blood, on pain?"

I saw uncertainty in their auras. The revelation of Rosemary's murder had caused a chink in the armor.

Then, to my immense shock, Peter spoke. "Mother got what she deserved."

"How can you say that?" I asked him, shocked at his careless words.

"She owed her existence to Joham, we all do. If it wasn't for him we wouldn't exist. You should be thankful uncle Matthew, you knew that girl because of him."

"He killed her!" I yelled. "Rosemary, Leah, my mother and all the woman he killed when he impregnated them. He would kill you all if it would help him," I said.

"Maybe, but he is still our grandfather, he raised us, helped mold us. He offers us a world where we rule and live as gods, how can we not fight for him? We owe him our existence, we are thankful to him as you should be as well."

The uncertainty faded from their auras as Peter's words gave them back their certainty.

"How could you say that? Your own mother died to save me."

"If she died it was because she was too weak," Peter said, no sympathy or compassion for his mother existed in his aura. "Gods are strong, mortals are weak."

"Gods? We are not Gods!" I roared.

My rage was growing, spreading. Only now it was not just for Joham, it was for the hybrids now. They had no humanity left in them, they never had. Joham had made them in his image.

Fine. if they would be with him, they could die with him.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

"I am glad you have moved on Leah, but did it have to be with a vampire?" dad asked.

I looked to the side, unable to meet his gaze. "Fred and me...it's complicated," I said.

"I swear, I die and everything goes to hell. Our future chief starts his own pack, imprints on a hybrid. Never saw that coming," dad said shaking his head.

"Nessie is okay," I said.

"Yes, but still. That is going to cause him problems down the road. I feel bad for that boy; he is going to have to go through a lot of heartache."

"I thought imprinting made everything all better?" I said.

"Love is harder then people think. True love can be the hardest of all."

Ho took a bite out of his sandwich.

"I am glad your mother and Charlie found one another."

"You are?" I asked.

"Leah, I am dead. I can't exactly hold your mother any more. I do not want her to be alone the rest of her life."

"But doesn't it bother you?" I asked.

"Course not. We spent more then twenty years together and had two wonderful children together. What she and Charlie have now is nothing compared to what we had. And one day we will be together again. I was really proud of you and Seth when you joined Jacob."

"I wasn't doing it for the Cullens," I said.

"True, but you intentions were still noble; you wanted to protect your brother."

"And get away from Sam."

"Don't try and dumb down what you did Leah. You put a lot at stake to protect Seth. And it was a good move, you got away from Sam and you were made beta. You made a good life for yourself Leah. You made amends with those you hurt; you learned to control your anger."

"Then I met Matthew," I said.

"Yes, the one who filed you with love. Poor kid, he has had such a hard life. He never knew love until you showed up in his life. You have sacrificed much for him Leah. Tell me, was he worth it?"

"Yes," I said firmly.

"Are you sure?"

"Of course. He is just a boy, born under unfortunate circumstances, with no one to love him. His whole life he was manipulated. He cannot help what he is. But I saw the good in him dad. The same goodness the Cullen's have, I saw humanity in a being who was never human. Vampires were human once, I was human once. Matthew never was, but I saw it in him. All he needed was someone to love and care for him, someone who wouldn't use him, someone who would teach him."

Dad smiled, like my answer pleased him. "I knew you got some of me in you. Our people have too much resentment towards the Cullen's. We think them monsters when the opposite is true. But the wolves blame them for their condition, and we hate them for the pain they bring you. It makes us blind to the truth, Seth was the first to see past it, he saw the Cullen's for what they really were."

"Yeah, he got teased a lot for it," I said.

"It is never easy to think differently then others. Everyone thought Seth was naive but he was smarter then them. They were too filled with fear at the hybrids existence to see. Fear does that, makes us blind. Sam acted too quickly, he let his own fear and resentment of the Cullens cloud his judgment. You, your brother and Jake did well to rebel. Otherwise you would have been responsible for the death of two innocent people; I shudder to think what that would have done to the pack."

There were times when I thought of what would have happened if we killed Bella while she was still carrying Nessie. I don't think Jake would have lasted long; he was barely hanging on as it was and I think killing Bella would have sent him over the edge. The rest of us...well I try not to think of it too much.

"Dad, what's going to happen to him now? To Matthew?"

Dad's look turned more somber.

"Dad? Is something going to happen to Matthew?"

"Not exactly Leah," he said.

"What is it? Please tell me," I begged him.

"In killing you Joham has opened Matthew's heart to hate. Matthew will seek vengeance for your death and destroy everything in his path to make Joham suffer."

"But Matthew wouldn't do that? He's not violent."

Okay, sure that had been a few incidents, like when he bit me on the arm, or when he attacked Emily, or when he killed the neighbor's dog or that time he flipped out from having a bad dream. But only when he was provoked, Matthew was normally a kind, peaceful boy.

"I told you anger and fear can make us blind, Leah. That boy is full of hate and he has no one to focus it on but the world."

* * *

Matthew P.O.V

"You all think you are so special? You think you are fit to rule this world? You all don't know a damn thing about the world! And it's time for this to end right now!" I yelled.

I focused my power on the Cullen's, on the wolves, on the Denali coven and yes on the Volturi.

I gave them courage and resolve, I dumbed down the wolves grief to help them focus on the fight. For those with gifts I made them stronger. Not full force, but much stronger then what they were before.

And just like that, the battle resumed, only this time the other team was winning.

The wolves were a monstrous force, driven by grief and rage they tore through the hybrids. I saw Vladimir fighting the boy who came to rescue me. The mist that came from the boy moved much more quickly and touched Vladimir, rendering him blind, deaf, and desensitized.

"No! We will have our revenge! The Romanians will rise again!" he roared. Obviously the boy's power did not make you mute.

Aro came up behind him and tore his head off. "Never again!" he said, his face full of triumphant fury.

"Vladimir, no!" Stefan screamed.

A dainty woman held onto him from behind, Caius descended on him, he looked like he was kissing Stefan's neck, but a second later his head fell to the ground. Caius let out a cry of victory and grabbed the woman, who let Stefan's body fall to the ground. He kissed her and she kissed him back with equal passion. I could see the love and admiration. It surprised me he could feel love; he was like Seraphina, so cold.

They broke apart and he pointed his fist, which was encased in a metal gauntlet and a stream of fire shot out onto Stefan's remains.

Stefan and Vladimir's children all cried for their fathers. Glad to see they could feel something for a parent.

They tried fighting back, they tried to use their power, but with me enhancing their enemies' powers the tide had now turned.

I saw Mia fighting a really pretty woman. I knew she was special; her power was something like Fred's, only it was attraction. I was always able to sense those like me, like Jasper, like Fred, like this woman. Those who had something to do with emotion.

The woman used her power on Mia. Mia stared at her amazed, like she was seeing something so amazing, something so beautiful. The woman smiled and struck like a viper. Good to look at, until it strikes.

Sarah was fighting the dull colored vampire. His face was always the same. Bored. His colors were dull, apathy and defeat clung to him like a perfume. He was so lifeless, like a robot.

He grabbed her arms and twisted them off, she screamed in pain and he bit her in the throat, crushing her wind pipe.

They were all slowly dying. My family. I was killing them. It may not be me that dealt the blows, but it was my will that gave them power and blood lust.

I had lived with them, played with them, I knew all their names, and I trained with them. But I let them die. I wanted them to die. All of them. Tonight Joham's blood would be wiped from the earth, his dream of a vampire hybrid world would die...with him.

"Matthew stop!" Joham cried.

Pain and horror shined from his aura. The sight of his kin dying brought him great pain. He may not be the best, but a part of him did care for his children and grandchildren. Watching them die did bring him some pain.

And I was loving every moment of it.

He had caused me such pain. He took my mother, he used me, changed me to be the son he wanted, stripped my identity from my being, he killed Rosemary, the only one who decided to stand against him and he took my Leah from me.

I will see him suffer as I have suffered; I will see them all suffer.

"Matthew stop, they are your family!" Joham yelled at me.

I laughed. "Family? What does that even mean Joham? You taught me family was something irrelevant, a means to an end. You taught me to think like an animal, remorseless, cold, and rational. You taught me that nothing miles in this world but survival. But Leah taught me to be more. For once in my life I finally found someone who could teach me how to love, to be human instead of a monster, and you took her from me."

I faced Joham. My father, my tormentor.

"She taught me the true meaning of love, but you Joham, you are the focus of my madness, and all my pain and suffering is because of you Joham. Tonight you have stolen the last loved one from me and I will not stop until I see you die!"

"You ungrateful bastard!" he yelled. "I gave you everything! I made you into a god, I made you into the most powerful being in the world and all I ask is for a little help and you whine and moan about how much you suffer! I will not let you destroy everything I have worked to create!"

"Then let's end it!" I roared.

"Yes, lets!"

We screamed at one another and charged. Only one thing on both our minds.

Death.

* * *

Fred P.O.V

I watched as Matthew and Joham fought one another.

I wanted to help him, but I had to get to Leah.

I ran to her, her blood filled the air. "Leah," I whispered. She looked so peaceful. Despite the fact hell had broken loose she was the only one who looked happy.

Her body had cooled a little but was still warmer then human.

I had failed. Once again I failed to save her. Now I had lost another. Before I lost a friend, now I loose the woman I love.

I sensed someone approaching, I gripped her tight in my arms and turned to hiss angrily at the intruder.

Edward, Kate, Nahuel and Seth stood there. Seth was still in wolf form, but his eyes betrayed the humanity that lurked within that giant monster form. Tears the size of grapes leaked from his eyes and fell to the ground.

He stepped forward and pressed his nose against her cheek. He whined softly and gently licked at her face.

"She's gone, I am so sorry Seth," I said, my voice breaking.

"Seth says it is not your fault," Edward said.

"I am sorry for your loss, I know what it is like to loose a sister," Kate said. She placed a hand on his shoulder.

There was a snap and Seth growled at her.

"Sorry, sorry!" Kate said putting her hands up defensively. "Matthew is amping my power, it's stronger then normal."

Nahuel knelled next to me, he looked at her with such pain in his eyes. I knew he loved her too, but I was not able to feel anger or resentment towards him, not now. Right now we were both brothers, sharing the pain of loosing a loved one.

"She looks so peaceful. She went down fighting until the bitter end." a tear fell down his face. "It's funny; it looks like she is still healing."

I looked at Leah again. I looked at her wounds, but her wounds were almost gone now. Her body was still healing. Human bodies do that too. I remember when I was human and I was taking advanced biology we learned even in death the body is still active for a while.

I don't know where I got the idea. Maybe I was desperate, maybe God was helping me. But I knew I had to do something. I had a plane and I had to be quick.

I looked at Edward and he looked skeptical.

"It's been too long, there might be damage, it might not work," he said.

"What are you talking about?" Nahuel asked.

"I have a plan, I think we can bring her back," I said.

Seth looked at me with a desperate hope in his eyes.

"But how?" Nahuel asked.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

"Then I have to go back dad, please," I said.

"It is not up to me sweetie, I am sorry. But no need to worry your friends have found a way," he said with a smile.

"What?"

"Your boy toy is a lot smarter then most give him credit for. He may be a vampire but at least you got a college kid," he said.

"So I am going back?" I asked.

"Yes. But you might not like what you see when you get back," he said.

He took my hands in his.

"Leah, when you return you won't remember this," he said.

"What? But why?" I asked.

"If everyone remembered what dying was like then they wouldn't be so afraid," he said with a smile. "Although you won't remember what was said here, you will now return with a sense of content, all the fears and things you wanted to say will no longer seem to matter because they were resolved here. But before you go, I must warn you."

"Of what?"

"Leah, there is still great danger lurking and I am not speaking about Joham. Something is...stirring."

Just then I felt a pang in my chest and I clutched it. It felt like someone had punched me in the chest.

"It is starting. Leah, there is no more time. Something is coming back, something old, something primal."

"What is it?" I asked.

"It is ancient, old as winter. It hunted our ancestors in the old days."

"You mean the Quileutes?"

"No, it predates the Quileutes," he said.

The sky began to darken. A mist began to appear from the trees. The once warm and comfortable atmosphere was turning cold and eerie. We stood up, but I almost fell when I felt another pain in my chest. I could swear I was hearing voices, urgent, scared, desperate.

"Dad, what is happening?" I asked.

He must have thought I was referring to the scenery.

"The dark is coming, it does not want you to go back Leah, it knows you have a role to play."

"Role? What role?"

Voices began to whisper around us. They were cold, angry even, but they said sweet thing.

"Stay here."

"Be happy."

"Stay with your father."

"It's better here."

"You'll be happy."

"No pain, no suffering."

"Together again."

"Dad, what is that?" I asked. Something in me was feeling terrified. I felt like...forgive the pun. I felt like a sheep who knew the wolf was hiding in sheep's clothing. Somehow I knew something deadly was close, every instinct, human and wolf was screaming at me to run and hide. The very fact both instincts agreed to run was amazing.

There was something crying in the dark. It sounded like a baby crying. Despite my fear I wanted to find that crying baby. Maybe it was my motherly instincts, but the baby sounded like it was in so much pain, like is was so alone.

"Do not be afraid Leah, it has no power here except what we give it. It can only try and intimidate us. But you can't scare a dead man." he stepped forward and spoke to the woods, to the darkness emanating them. "You will leave now!"

The voices spoke again, only this time they were a lot less nice.

"Kill you!"

"Rip to shreds!"

"Drink your blood!"

"Dance in your entrails!"

"Poke out your eyes!"

"Kill her!"

"Hate you all!"

"You are nothing but a shade, you have no place here, now leave!"

The mist and shadows began to retreat. For a moment I thought I saw something in the darkness. It was vaguely humanoid. I could not tell if it was a male or female. It's shape kept on flickering, it made it impossible to tell what it was.

The only thing that stuck out was its eyes. They were pure black. Blacker then the night sky, so dark they stuck out against the shadows in the woods. Like two glowing black orbs in the dark. I didn't think black could glow but these eyes did. It was staring at me, I knew it was. Looking into those eyes made my heart turn cold with fear. It looked at me with such hate, such resentment, such dark need, such hunger. I knew it wanted to kill me. No, not just kill me. It wanted to hurt me, and then kill me.

I was staring into the abyss, and the abyss was staring back.

But then it faded away into the shadows and the light banished it away. The warm peaceful atmosphere returned.

"What the fuck was that?" I asked.

The pain hit me again and I fell to my knees. The world began to blur, I felt like something was tugging on me, pulling me away.

"Leah, you must go. Before you face the dark you must survive the battle. Only you can calm Matthew down, if you don't his wrath will spread," dad said. "Matthew is the only one who can stop it and if he gives in to his anger then the darkness will win."

He took my hand in his.

"I love you Leah and I am really proud of you. And I want you to be strong, for what is to come next," he said.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

His face was somber.

"Dad, tell me everything will be okay, tell me, me and Matthew will be okay?" I asked.

"I am sorry Leah, be strong. And know I will always be with you. I love you, take care."

The world began to shimmer and fade, I felt as if I was in free fall.

"Dad wait!" I yelled.

* * *

"Clear!"

Something touched my chest and my whole body felt like it had been shocked.

I gasped for breath and opened my eyes. Edward, Kate, Nahuel, Seth in his wold form, and Fred.

"Oh my God it worked!" Nahuel said.

"Welcome back to the land of the living she-wolf," Kate said.

"Nice seeing you too. Now could you please take your hands of my tits?" I asked.

"Oh sorry," she said. She let go of my chest and I tried to sit up. Fred helped me, cradling me in his arms.

"What happened?" I asked.

"You were dead," Edward said.

"What?"

"Yes, you died Leah, don't you remember?" Fred asked gently.

"I...I don't..."

I felt like I was forgetting something, something really important, but I couldn't remember.

"Did you see anything?" Kate asked.

"Why? I mean I was only gone a few moments right?"

"Leah, you were dead for seven minutes," Edward said.

"What!"

"Yes. Fred saw your body was still healing even while you were dead and he hoped it had repaired itself enough to the point where you could be revived. We used Kate as a stand-in defibrillator."

"Hence the hands on the chest," she said with a smile.

"I didn't know you were that powerful," I said.

"Normally I am not, but since Matthew is making us all ridiculously strong and enhancing our powers I can do all kinds of things I couldn't do before."

"Matthew? Where is he?"

The moved a little to let me see. Things had improved for us. The remaining hybrids had regrouped around Seraphina who was keeping the rest of the Volturi back with her power. She had caused another wall of fire to separate her and the survivors from the guard.

But it was the sight of Matthew standing over Joham that caught my eye.

Matthew stared at Joham with a look that did not belong on his face. His lips were curled into a sick smile. He looked like Jane when she was using her power. His eyes sparkled with a wicked delight as Joham cowered from him.

Joham, the once tall and proud bowed before his son, shuddering in fear. He clutched his head and was moaning. "Please, no more, I am sorry, please, stop, please, I beg you!" Joham yelled.

Matthew just smiled. Taking sadistic pleasure in his fathers fear. But this was not right, my Matthew is not sadistic, my Matthew does not torture any one.

Something told me that if I didn't stop him now he would never stop.

"Matthew, stop!" I yelled.

Matthew's head flew to my direction. The evil sadism vanished from his eyes, replaced by love and wonder. The face I knew so well. "Leah?" he whispered.

The field was silent, save for the sound of Seraphina's fire. I could hear people whispering, amazed I was alive. I could hear Jake and the others growling in pleasure, happy I was alive.

"Leah!" Matthew shouted. He ran towards us, his eyes shining with tears.

As he ran a blue light emanated from the wall of fire where Seraphina was.

"Matthew look out!" I yelled.

He turned towards the danger, just as he did some thing blue shot from the wall of fire and hid him right in the chest. A wall of fire erupted from his chest. It hit him so hard he spun around and slammed into the ground.

I could hear his flesh sizzling like meat on a grill, steam rose from where he was hit and the smell of burned flesh was thick in the air.

Matthew clutched the part where he had been hit. I knew it had to be bad, because he was not screaming. He should be screaming. Here is a note. If someone is hurt and they don't feel bad, that is very, very, very bad.

"Matthew!" I screamed.

I tried to stand up but I was still too weak from my near...make that death experience.

Matthew was shaking as he stood. I felt sick when I saw the blast had hit him just below his left shoulder. His skin was black and cracked. Had he been human, he would be dead.

He glared over at the fire. Seraphina stepped out from the protective wall, blue fire danced around her body, making her seem like a fiery angel. The guard went to attack her but she raised her arms and there was a small explosion, two of the guards managed to just get blown back, the other three were blown apart and reduced to ash.

"Allow me to show you why they call me the burning one," she said.

The blue fire began to move and take shape; it spread out behind her back and formed six, fiery blue angel like wings. That coupled with her angelic beauty made her look like a literal angel. You could easily fall for it if it if you didn't know what she really was.

The wings pulled and flapped forward, a rush of blue fire shot forth. The vampires all scattered. The second the fire touched the trees they burst into brilliant flame. The ground was scorched black where the fire had touched.

I was starting to wish the Egyptian vampire Benjamin was here. I remembered he could manipulate the elements and I am sure he would be really useful right now.

The Volturi could not get close, the heat was too intense and every time they tried to use their power she would attack them.

She turned too look at me and she smiled, I knew what her next target would be.

She raised her hand high above and a giant blue ball of fire, like a little mini son the size of a church bell formed. I knew that if it hit us we would be so dead.

"NOOOOO!" some one yelled.

The night time sky was filled with screaming, but it was no one from our side. The hybrids behind Seraphina were screaming, one girl who was naked, the one who burned like the human torch writhed on the ground.

"Mother! Help it hurts!" she screamed.

The ball vanished and Seraphina turned to glare at Jane. "Bitch, how dare you attack my kin!"

"It is not her Seraphina," Matthew said.

Seraphina turned to glare at Matthew. "How?"

"Pain is just another emotion for me to manipulate, I have seen it used enough to know how to copy it!"

"On your kin! What monster would torture his own family!" she demanded.

"In case you didn't notice it runs in the family," Matthew said coldly.

Joham stood up; the affects of Matthew's power wore off. "Seraphina, we must retreat!" he said.

"Yes father!"

"No!" Matthew said.

Joham looked to Matthew. "Enough is enough, you have won. You have your memories, you have your adoptive mother, you have won. What more do you want?"

The hybrids continued to scream in pain.

"Will you stop that for God's sake!" Joham said.

"No, I told you it ends tonight Joham. And I meant it."

The hybrids stopped screaming, they stood up on shaky legs.

There was a look in Matthew's eyes. A look I know all too well. The look you get when you are turning your emotions off, the look you get when you are about to kill. Cold, hard, remorseless.

"Matthew, what are you doing?" Joham asked cautiously,

"Ending it." Matthew looked to Seraphina. "Seraphina, they call you the burning one? Well tonight, you burn for the last time."

Matthew closed his eyes. Seraphina's fire began to grow.

"What are you doing?" Seraphina asked sounding worried.

"What is what's wrong?" Joham asked her.

"He is doing something...my power...I...I...I can't!"

"Mother stop!"

The girl from earlier, her and the other hybrids were shielding themselves from Seraphina's fire, their cloths were smoldering and and their skin was beginning to blacken.

Seraphina was trying to reign in her power, that was obvious, but obviously she was no longer in control. The fire was so strong I could feel it and I was over fifty feet away.

Her fire grew bigger and bigger, and got closer and closer to the hybrids.

"No, Matthew stop!" Seraphina said. "Please, I beg you, not my daughter!"

"You know something Seraphina?" Matthew asked. He raised his arm, his hand was flat. "I never did like you."

He formed a fist and her power exploded.

Fred covered me with his body. The shock of the impact could be felt though. The wind rushed past us and the ground trembled, as if there was an earthquake.

For a moment the world turned dark, when I woke up the were three of everything, I could barely hear anything. Fred was in front of me, shaking me, I could distantly hear him say my name.

"Leah, come on we have to run!"

"Wha...wha?"

Seth appeared next to him, I hoped to God he found the time to put his shorts on.

"Leah come on!"

The picked me up, I was still too weak to move by myself. There was fire everywhere. A deep crater had formed where Seraphina had been.

"What happened?" I asked.

"She blew up, literally. The hybrids were vaporized. I think Joham was caught in the blast too," Nahuel said.

"Come on, we have to go!" Fred said.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because of the fireballs," Alice said.

I realized we were the only ones here. My brothers, the Cullens, the Denalis, Fred, Nahuel, his aunt...where was Matthew?

"Wait...what fireballs?"

She pointed up. The clouds were orange and glowed like fire was in them. There was a sound like thunder.

"When she blew up a massive pillar of fire went into the sky. The Volturi already left, I showed Aro what is about to happen."

"What is about to happen?" I asked.

"You ever see the old ten commandments movie?" she asked.

"The one with Charles Hesston?" I asked.

She nodded.

"Yeah, why?"

"Well, remember the part where all that fire comes falling down from the sky?"

* * *

Matthew P.O.V

My body hurt.

Rubble was piled on top of me, bits of a tree, moss, leaves. The log was really heavy. It would crush a human, but I was not a human.

I pushed the log off and dusted myself off. I hissed in pain, the spot on my chest where Seraphina hit me with her fire still hurt. The skin was still black and raw, but it was healing. If a human had been hit by it they would have gone into shock and died.

I had used my power to make her power grow beyond her control. I remember making it strong, as strong as I could, I added different and opposing emotions to cause her to lose control. Then she blew up.

I remember being forced back by the force of the explosion, the heat of it singed my skin.

It caused me to go flying in the trees. I saw Brand and the remaining hybrids. They were so close that they were turned to ash. Brand could make her skin blazing hot, but even she couldn't survive the blast.

As I flew back I saw Fred cover Leah up, they were far away enough to not be affected by the blast. Or so I thought. As soon as the blast wave hit him he and the others went flying. I cursed myself a fool for making the blast so strong. What if I hurt one of the Cullens or the Denalis? The wolves even. They were not as durable as a vampire. I prayed my need for vengeance hadn't hurt someone I care for.

Speaking of vengeance what happened to Joham? He had been closer to the blast then I was. Was he dead? Did the blast manage to kill him? Was I finally free of him? Or was he still lurking around? I lost sight of him in the light of the blast.

Was the fire of her blast strong enough to kill a vampire? Sure it killed the hybrids, but they were a quarter human. What would it do to a pure blood. A vampire could be around fire, they could go into a burning building and not fear the fire. Only when you tear them to pieces and expose the venom to fire should they be afraid.

The hybrids and Romanians were dead...I was starting to have mixed feelings about that. The memories in me made by Rosemary that made me loyal to Joham, along with the memories I made with the hybrids. Brand, Morphia, Peter, Gregory, Stephan. They were all dead and gone. Even the vampires serving the Romanians, the ones they turned from the village are dead. I saw Mikhail fighting a giant vampire with black hair. Mikhail was good, but the other vampire was better. He wasn't special like some of the other Volturi, unless you count mad vampire fighting skills as a gift.

I fell to my knees and began to cry. I was feeling vindicated, I was feeling guilt, I was feeling pleasure, I was feeling shame. I had given into my darkest desires, for a moment I was truly a monster. A part of me still felt I was in the right, but another felt I had crossed a line.

I could have used my power to make everyone calm and rational. I could have made them surrender and hand them over to the Volturi. But I wanted to punish them myself, I wanted to hurt them, I wanted them to suffer.

All because I thought Leah was dead.

I killed my whole family for vengeance.

But now Leah was alive, what excuse did I have for my actions?

The sky glowed orange; fireballs began to fall from the sky. I distantly remembered a blast of fire shooting into the sky when Seraphina blew up.

This entire area was about to become a death trap, I had to find her.

"Leah!"

I quickly ran, trying to pick up some trace of her. I distantly sensed them up ahead, trying to outrun the fire pouring from the sky. I ran in their direction. The fireballs fell to the earth. Some as big as a baseball, others big enough to be a beach ball.

I tried not to look at the sky as I ran a reminder of what my vengeance wrought. I was a bit slow because of my wounds, but I was able to dodge the fireballs. Even in death Seraphina was trying to kill me.

How like her.

* * *

Sacrifice: Something offered in sacrifice, Destruction or surrender of something for the sake of something else, something given up or lost.

Example: Matthew makes the ultimate sacrifice to save Leah.

Leah P.O.V

I felt like I was in hell.

The sky rained down fire, we ran as fast as we could, while trying to avoid the hellfire. I wanted to try and stay to find Matthew, but the fire was getting worse. By the time it was done the whole area would be rubble.

"Thanks for bringing me back," I said to Fred.

"My pleasure," he said with a smile.

"Please tell me he is alive," I said.

"He is, our boy didn't go through all that to be taken out," he said. "Try not to worry about him Leah, remember, he survived on his own for six months before we found him."

I liked how he said our boy. He was right; Matthew could take care of himself.

We continued to run, avoiding the raining fire as much as possible. Everything was going smooth until we came to a deep fiery chasm. It was well over a hundred feet, I had no doubt in my mind the fire would kill me if I fell down. The jump was impossible for a human to make, but easy for us to make.

The only problem was the fire raining for the sky. If we weren't careful a ball of fire could hit us and send us plummeting down into the chasm.

"To hell with this, why don't we just go the left?" Rose said pointing up the chasm.

A giant ball of fire hit the ground in the direction where Rose was pointing. Blocking our path with fire and causing a mass of trees to block the way.

"Or not," she said.

We had no choice but to go across the chasm. One by one they jumped, taking their time to jump. It was tricky for Jake and the others, their wolf forms were larger so it was harder for them to dodge the fire. Much of their fur was already singed; I could not wait to see what they looked like as humans. If I lived to see that, I mean.

Soon they all jumped, leaving me and Fred. "All right, here we go," he said.

"If you drop me I will be so pissed," I said.

"Don't worry; I'll never let you go."

"I liked the sound of that," I said with a smile.

"Hey Leah, when we get back to La Push, I think we should get married," he said.

"Your asking me to marry you when we are about to jump over a giant fiery pit?" I asked.

"Seems like the right time."

"…..I'll think about it," I said.

"Wow, were breaking all kinds of barriers huh?"

He took a step back and started to run. I screamed loud as we jumped over the chasm, we would have made it if it wasn't for the ball of fire hitting us.

One minute we were almost there, the next a freaking fire ball comes out of nowhere and hits us. Then were heading for the bottom. Luckily we hit the wall, I would have fallen to my death but Fred's reflex's allowed him to grab onto the wall and grab me in time.

"Hold on Leah!" he yelled.

"Yeah, because letting go was an idea!" I snapped back.

"Always with the lip!" he mumbled.

"I heard that!" I snapped.

We climbed as quickly as we could. But the walls were being hit by the fireballs which impacted so hard the tremors threatened to shake us off. Cracks began to appear on the walls of the chasm and large stone pieces were falling down.

If we didn't hurry we would be buried by stone and burn.

"Leah, look out!" Jake yelled.

A fire ball hit right next to me and Fred. I screamed and heard the sound of maniacal laughter. I looked and saw standing above on the other side of the chasm was Seraphina.

"Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! That's right, burn!" she said. A look of pure madness on her face.

"Why won't you just die!" I screamed.

"Matthew, he took my world from me, so it's only fare I take his world from him, get ready to burn in hell!" she said.

A ball of fire appeared in her hand and I knew she would not miss. But then something came up from behind her and they both went flying into the chasm.

"Matthew!" I screamed.

They hit the wall and both grabbed onto it. Matthew began to race up to us, Seraphina hot on his heels.

"Go, go, go!" he yelled.

Seraphina caught his leg.

"You're not going anywhere!" she screamed.

"God, will you just fuck off and die already!" Matthew screamed at her.

She smiled and his paint leg caught on fire. The fire began to spread up his body and he screamed in pain.

I remembered the horrible dream I had, or should I say a vision. The chasm, the fire, Seraphina and Matthew. Just like the dream I had where she pulled him into a lake of fire.

"We're all going to burn together, one big happy family!" Seraphina screeched madly.

She threw a ball of fire at me and Fred. It missed but the impact caused cracks to appear, the cracks were slowly spreading and I knew if we didn't hurry we would fall when the wall fell into the ground.

Seraphina began to go ape shit on the chasm, sending fire ball after fire ball in all directions, weakening the already fragile structure of the chasm.

"Are you happy now Matthew? You can be with both your mother and your bitch!" Seraphina yelled. Matthew was covered in fire.

He brought his other leg up and aimed it right at her face.

"Say hi to everyone for me!"

He kicked her right in the face, blood squirted out and she screamed. She let go of him and the wall and fell screaming to the inferno below. Hopefully this time it would stick.

"Matthew!" I screamed.

"Leah! Run!" he yelled.

"No, Fred, take us down, we have to save him!"

"We can't the wall is collapsing!" Fred yelled.

"I don't care, we can't leave him!" I yelled.

The others were yelling above us, telling us to hurry up. If they tried to climb down their weight could cause the walls to collapse and kill us.

"Hold on Matthew, we'll save you!" I yelled.

"Just go, I am dead!"

"No! I am not leaving you again!" I yelled.

He smiled; how he could smile while he was burning I didn't know.

"Live Leah, for me."

"I won't leave you!"

I meant it, either we both got out, or neither of us got out. He knew this, he got a sad smile on his face, he looked to Fred and they had a look that spoke so many things. An understanding.

"Matthew don't you dare let go!" I yelled.

"Take care of her Fred-Fred, I love you both."

Matthew looked up to the others. They were all screaming at him to hold on.

Two tear drops leaked from his eyes. "I love you all!"

"MATTHEW NOOOOO!" I yelled.

Matthew let go.

"AGGGHHH!" I screamed.

He fell into the chasm, his smile never left his face, his eyes never left mine. I watched as he fell, falling, falling into fire.

"No! Matthew! Matthew!" I screamed.

Fred hauled me up, I tried to fight him, tried to get him to let me go. But his grip was like a vice. He got us up in time, a second later a large chunk of rock, the same part where we were a moment before fell off and plummeted into the inferno below.

We made it to the top and the others helped us up. I tried to run into the pit but the others stopped me. I could sense Jasper trying to calm me down but my grief was too great for him. The ground began to shake and we ran from the chasm as it began to cave in.

I was still too weak to phase, other wise I would have transformed and jumped in after my boy. I knew there was no way he survived, especially not now with the chasm breaking down like that. But I didn't care.

"Matthew! Matthew!" I cried.

I fell to the ground, to weak to move. My spirit shattered. There was no way I could save him now. He was gone now, I could not reach him. He was dead and ash now and there was nothing I could do. Fred tried to grab me but I fought them, I didn't want to leave, I had to stay.

Maybe he got away? Maybe he was still alive down there.

"Leah, we have to go!" Nahuel shouted.

"Fuck you! I'm staying!" I yelled at him.

A cold touch washed over my over heated skin on my shoulder. I looked and saw it was Kate. "Sorry, Leah."

I hit the ground before I could react. My last vision was of fire and shadow. And my son, falling into it all, with a smile on his face.

 

**Fusedtwilight: Joham and his coven are gone, Leah is alive but Matthew is now lost. How will his loss affect Leah and everyone? Is this loss the final push that will make Leah tumble of the edge? Will Fred be able to keep her from doing harm to herself? Only two more chapters to go before Focused Madness ends. Please review.**


	32. Chapter 32

Focused Madness

Chapter 32

**Fusedtwilight:** **Last chapter Matthew sacrificed himself to save everyone. Joham and his army are defeated, but Leah must now deal with the soul shattering loss of the most precious person in her life.**

**Will Leah survive this loss? Or will it be too much?**

 

Fred P.O.V

We stayed in Volterra for three days to recover.

But I don't think all our wounds will recover if we had three lifetimes.

Leah cried a lot on the first day. After she woke up from being shocked asleep by Kate she cried and she raged. I was there for her, Nahuel was there, Seth and the other wolves were there, but nothing could help.

My eyes burned a lot that day. We all cried for Matthew. His loss affected us all. Some more then others.

The human media is reporting that the fire from the sky was some kind of gas leak. Not everyone is buying it, some are saying it was a terrorist attack, some are saying it was a sign God was angry. All kinds of theories are abound. Some are even saying it was aliens planning their attack on Earth.

The second day Leah was silent. She didn't cry; she didn't speak to anyone. Just stared off into space, her mind a million miles away.

I never left her side. I thought about Matthew a lot, how could I not. I remembered the first time we met. I remembered how strange he was, how brave he was to speak to me all by himself. I remembered how we used to wrestle in the woods, how I used to teach him when Leah was away at work. I remembered all the holidays we had, the nights we would hunt together, how we would challenge one another to catch the biggest prey.

I remembered how he was so innocent, yet so broken. His sanity on a fragile thread. That Thread snapped that night of the battle. Seeing Leah dead caused something dark and deadly to come forth in him. I have seen him in many moods, but never did I ever see him like that.

The Cullen's and wolves phoned over to Washington to let everyone know everything was okay. They told them we would be back soon.

Leah refused to talk to her mother. She didn't eat, didn't sleep, didn't speak, just sat there and stared off into space.

On the third and final day we prepared to leave, but before we did Aro had a huge meeting in the main hall.

"Once again, we stand victorious my children. But not without a cost," Aro said. "Six of our guard were lost in the battle. As was one brave young man."

Aro looked to us, his usual smile on his face.

"Carlisle, we owe you much. Had you not warned us I shudder to think of what would have happened."

"No one wants a war Aro, especially not us," Carlisle said.

"Still, we are in your debit...that is new for us, we have never owed another before."

"No, we have not," Caius said, not looking pleased at being in debt to anyone.

"Still a reward is due. For the wolves I think an anonymous donation to your tribe is due. I know your economy is not the best," Aro said.

"We don't need your money, we can take care of ourselves," Jake said gruffly.

Aro laughed. "My dear boy, please, take the money...I insist," Aro said. His tone was friendly, but there was an undertone that said Jake and his tribe had no choice but to accept.

"Now as for the Cullens who have no use for money, we know you have had problems with nomads before. So from this day forth the Cullen clan, the Olympic coven along with their cousin coven the Denali clan will be listed as untouchable. From this day forth, should any nomad dare raise their hand against you they will have us to answer too. It is the least we can do to say thanks."

"Thank you Aro," Carlisle said bowing his head respectfully.

"Now, as for the matter of young Matthew. I have a gift for you all."

He snapped his fingers and one of the doors on the side of the hall opened. Two vampires came in carrying something wrapped in a red cloth. They sat it down on the center of the floor. They took the red cloth off and we all stared in shock.

Leah moved, taking a few stepped closer to get a better look.

It was a marble statue, made to look just like Matthew. I don't know who made it, but it was so perfect. They got everything right, the size, the mass, everything. Even the smile on his face. It was eerie.

"For his sacrifice to save our world, both human and vampire, Matthew Clearwater will be remembered now and forever, a hero to all. We will build statues and paintings of him, poems will be written about his bravery. This I promise, although humanity will not know what he has done, Matthew will never be forgotten."

Leah touched the face of the statue; she put her hand to her mouth and began to cry.

I put my hand on her shoulders; she hugged me, put her face on my shoulder and began to cry. I looked away from the statue, the realness was too good. Looking at it was just a bitter reminder of what we had lost.

We thanked Aro and the others for their generosity and left. Aro had arranged a private jet to take us back to Forks.

The atmosphere was different then what it was when we flew to Volterra. Everyone was quiet, more subdued, we were all still in shock at what happened. Still trying to come to terms that he was gone.

Leah stared out the window for the entire time. We did not try to get her to talk, we knew it was pointless. She needed her space. The loss of Matthew hit her the hardest, I feared her pain went deeper than any of us thought.

" _Edward, are we going to have to watch her?"_ I asked him mentally.

Leah's depression might turn suicidal. It happened sometimes, one loss can make a person loose all hope.

Edward glanced at me and nodded. I bit my lip and glanced at Leah. I won't let her go through this alone. None of us will. But I fear that she won't make it easy for any of us.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

"Mom! Dad!" Nessie yelled.

Charlie dropped her off at the Cullen's. The second she saw Edward and Bella she ran to them. She jumped at Edward and he caught her in his arms and hugged her tight. Bella put her arms around Edward and her daughter and they had a big family hug.

I looked away, unable to see such a powerful show of family love.

"So, how was your trip?" Charlie asked.

"The usual, boring," Bella said.

Charlie just smiled. "Well I got to get going, sorry I can't stay longer, but there a call of some drunkard causing a scene and I got to take care of it," Charlie said.

He left leaving us all alone.

"Where is Matthew?" Nessie asked.

No one answered her. When we left she had been hopeful we would succeed. I did not stick around to find out what would be said.

"I'm going home," I said.

I got up and headed outside, no one followed me. I was close to the woods when a voice sounded behind me. "Leah."

I spun around. It was Fred. "God damn it, I told you don't do that!" I said.

"I am sorry. I just wanted to see how you were doing," he said.

"Fine, my son is dead and I am just peachy," I snapped.

"Leah...I am sorry-"

"You should be! It's all your fault!"

He looked at me taken aback. "Leah?"

"What good are you? We gave you a home, we sheltered you, but what good are you? Your supposed to have this great big power and you couldn't even protect us."

An angry look washed over his face. "You don't think I know that? You don't think I blame myself? Believe me I do Leah."

"Well good, as long as we are on the same page then!" I headed for the woods. "And by the way, the answer is no!"

I knew he would figure I was referring to when he proposed to me. I was being a raging bitch but I didn't care. I was so angry, so fucking pissed and I could not hold it in.

I was just about to phase when Seth showed up. "Hey," he said.

"How is the little leech?" I asked.

He frowned, but ignored what I said. "Hard, she and Matthew were friends, she is crying right now."

"Load of good it is doing now," I said.

"Come on Leah, don't be like that," he said.

"Like what?" I snapped.

He sighed. "Nothing, let's go home."

We phased and headed for home. I was glad he couldn't hear my thoughts. I didn't want anyone in my mind right now, I doubt anyone could touch my mind and come out unscathed right now.

When we were close enough to home we phased and walked the rest of the way there. The light on the porch was on, I could hear mom inside. I don't know how she knew we were there, but before we hit the steps the door opened and there she was.

Her face was both sad and happy. She already knew what happened.

She kissed us both and hugged us. I welcomed the hug. "I am so glad you are both safe." she looked at me and her eyes widened. "Good lord Leah you look horrible."

"Thanks mom," I said snarkly.

"Your bed is ready, go get some sleep," she said.

I was feeling exhausted. I haven't slept in days. Too many bad dreams. I silently made my way to my room. I closed and locked the door. Didn't want anyone coming in the have a nice talk and try to make me feel better. My state of mind I was libel to kill them.

I laid on my bed but I didn't sleep. I looked at my arm, the one that had the scar. This was the only thing I had left of him now. The only proof that I had a son once. A beautiful, beautiful little boy. With warm chocolate brown eyes and black hair and very bad grammar.

I held that arm close.

Many hours later I could hear mom and Seth talking, they must really think I was asleep.

"My God, did you see her eyes?" I heard mom say.

"She hasn't slept in a few days. Hasn't eaten. I am worried mom, she is starting to go back to her old self and I am worried it will be worse this time," Seth said.

"I almost didn't recognize her Seth. What are we going to do?"

"Were going to have to watch her. Edward and Carlisle took me aside to talk to me real quick. They said we need to watch her...she may turn suicidal."

"Suicidal? My daughter?" mom said sounding frantic.

"I know, I thought the same thing. But she is in a real dark place now. We need to watch her."

"Oh hell she is all alone in her room!"

I heard feet quickly moving against the floor.

"Her heart is still beating mom, she is fine," Seth said.

I heard mom release a breath of air. A sigh of relief.

"Oh Seth, what are we going to do?" mom asked.

"Be there for her, support her. That's all we can do mom."

Suicidal? Me?

I would never take my own life...would I?

* * *

Remembrance: The ability to remember, an act of calling to mind, a memory of a person, thin or event.

Example: Matthew's friends and family all speak of him in remembrance.

A few days later and for the first time ever La Push had a wake for a hybrid.

There was no body of course, but Matthew would be the first hybrid to ever be honored by the Quileute tribe.

Everyone came, all the wolves, both Jake's and Sam's, even the wolf pups showed up. The council, the imprints. The Cullens and the Denali coven. Jake convinced the elders to let Nahuel and his aunt on our land for the wake. Despite that fact, they drank human blood; they were well watched during the wake.

In the old days our ancestors would put the body of the deceased in a canoe and send them out to the ocean.

We don't do that anymore. We do the usual bury them six feet under thing, but since we had no body they amassed a lot of wood to form a massive bonfire. They tossed flowers and other special scented objects in that were supposed to help appease the spirits and shit like that.

Everyone wore black. Rain clouds filled the sky, I could smell the rain, it would fall soon.

First they had people come up and stand before everyone and give a little speech about Matthew and how they knew him and how he changed their lives.

"I met him by chance," Carlisle said. "I had no idea what I was getting my family into when I took him in. He was such a wild child. Broke an orderly's arm." everyone chuckled at that. The image of a full grown man being taken down by a child amused them. "He was blessed with a great power and an innocent look on the world. To him there was no good or evil, the world simply...was. It is always sad when a child dies. Although he was not fully human his purity gave him a level of humanity many would die to protect. I will never forget how he brought that innocence into my life and how he gave me hope for the future."

People clapped and he went to join his family.

Esme went up next.

"I love children, all children. When my husband told me he found a hybrid child that had been wondering alone in the world my heart broke. I expected to find a frightened little thing, but Matthew proved even children can be strong. Strong to face the world and all the hardships it has to offer. I am glad we were able to shed some light in his life. Give him the love and care he so deserved. Had he been allowed to live I am sure he could have spread that love and shared it with the world."

We all clapped again and she went to stand by her husband. Carlisle patted her on the shoulder and she kissed him on the cheek.

Emmett got up next. "I really loved that little punk," he said with his big goofy grin. But it was not as warm as usual. "We used to wrestle and pull pranks and tell jokes. You spend a few decades with grownups and you begin to forget how fun being a kid is. When you are so young and full of energy, when your mind is so open to possibility and reality is yours to change. But Matthew could see a little deeper. Sure he was a kid, but he was also old in a way. Having lost his memory and strived to survive all alone made him seem like a grown up at times. He could understand pain so well and I think that was why we loved him so much, we have all experienced some kind of pain and he knew what it was like. I hope now he is in a world where there is no pain, where he can be happy and have lots of fun. And he better be ready for when we meet again because we're going to wrestle!"

Some people laughed, others chuckled. It was both a funny speech and really deep. Here I always thought he was an idiot.

Nessie went next. Her parents followed her but after a few steps she looked at them and shook her head. They backed down without a word, Jake watched her carefully. Maybe he was afraid she would fall down or something, I don't know. Fucking imprinting fucks you all up.

Nessie stood in front of us all, looking a little nervous. She took a deep breath and spoke in a shaky voice.

"Matthew was my best friend. Besides Nahuel he was the only other hybrid, plus he was closer to my age. I had a lot of fun being friends with him. He was so nice and kind, plus I thought he was cute." she smiled, her voice had become less shaky and more confidant. "I wish I could have seen him one last time, we would talk about all kinds of things. I like to think of him as the brother I never had. I can't have friends with human children due to my condition, but thanks to him I got to know what it was like to have a friend my own age. I only wish we could be friends as adults."

She bowed and went to go join her parents. A tear fell down her cheek and Bella wiped it away gently.

Seth went next.

"The first time I met him he tried to eat me," he said.

I chuckled, a few people looked at me surprised. I hadn't laughed in a while. But the memory of that day...God that was such a great day.

"I was drinking from the creek, minding my own business when I catch his scent and he comes down from the trees. Then next thing I know I am naked and human. Then he goes from super psycho child killer to confused and puzzled. He was a good kid, I always wanted a little brother and being with Matthew helped me learn what that would be like. Then, I got to know what it would be like to be an uncle. He may not be a Quileute by blood, but he went down fighting for his friends and family, just like a wolf. And I dare say he could put some of us to shame."

Jake's pack and myself let out a quick 'whoop, whoop!' mine was the loudest and proudest. Damn right he was a warrior! My boy could have kicked all their asses.

Sam and his pack followed our lead, as did the council and the imprints. A show of respect towards him.

A part of me felt grateful for it. But it was overshadowed by the sea of melancholy I felt.

Seth stepped down and to my surprise mom went next.

"I didn't know this young man. I heard all about him. I admit I was more scared of him because of what he was. But I was also grateful to him. He gave my daughter a little bit of light she needed. I am glad he was able to help make her into a stronger woman. I wish I could have been more supportive to her when it came to him. I also wish I could have met him. But I am proud to have him in my family and I will help make sure that future generations of Clearwaters know what he did for our family and our tribe."

People clapped for her and she stepped down. Rose went, Alice went, Jasper, Bella, Edward, Jake, Embry, Quil, Carmen. Each talked about how much they cared for him, what they thought of him.

Eleazar was next.

"When I first met him I was amazed by him. To think such a small creature could have so much power in them. He had such potential, so many ways he could have used his gift. It shames me to think his own father, one of my own kind used him in such a manner. He could have gave hundreds of thousands love, compassion and warmth. But sadly most only use power to destroy. I so wish he could have lived, he saved the world, but I think he could have changed it, truly, for the better."

Nahuel went up and spoke next.

"For many years I hated myself," he said. "I like the rest of my kin killed my mother. I was lucky to have my aunt with me, otherwise when Joham would next find me I fear I would be dead with the rest of them. I always thought I was evil, that it was in my blood. Then I came here years ago and saw the Cullen's. Met Edward, his wife and their daughter. And although I did not hate myself no longer, I felt such envy. A good loving father, a beautiful mother. They were the family I always wanted. But then I met Matthew and I knew hope. I know normally we would be enemies because of the life me and my aunt live, but I owe the Quileute tribe a lot. You helped protect him when I could not. I wish I had gone with Leah when she left, but I knew I would be a burden, she would have her hands filled with Matthew. But now I am alone, my father, my sisters and their children are dead and if I could I would gladly switch places with Matthew. If anyone from my family deserves to live, it is him."

He stood down and went to join his aunt. She squeezed his shoulder, in a comforting way.

Tanya, Garret, and Kate went. The clouds were darkening. It would rain soon. A few of the elders went, some of Sam's wolves. Their speeches were short. But all the same. How grateful they were to Matthew, and everything. Assholes. One minute they want to kill him now they have the balls to be standing up there acting all grateful.

It was only when Emily went to talk I really got mad.

"I only met him once and we all know how it ended," she said.

Yeah, he tried to kill you. Because you had to get Sam to let you come to the fucking game!

My fists shook and Fred grabbed my hand. We had not spoken to one another since we got back, I hadn't really talked to anyone. They quickly learned the consequences of trying to comfort me.

"I hold no grudge, he is part vampire, blood lust is in their nature. We Quileutes have spent a long time hating vampires. We have our reasons and excuses. We have spent so long thinking them as evil and monsters I think we have forgotten they are people too. They feel love and pain just like the rest of us. Matthew taught us all an important lesson I think. Humanity isn't something you are born with. It's not about chromosomes, or DNA. Humanity is something we must earn. Vampires were human once, so were the werewolves. But Matthew was never human, but in his final hour he found out what it means to be human."

People clapped but I didn't. She passed me on her way back, our eyes crossed and I looked away. I didn't care how nice and sweet her speech was. What did she know about humanity? She didn't know him at all. I bet she didn't think he was human when he was trying to kill her.

Sam went next. That surprised me. That surprised a whole lot of people.

"I know it is a shock to see me up here speaking about him," he said. "I won't hide it, I never liked him. He was dangerous, to everyone. He tried to kill the woman I love and I would have hunted him to the ends of the earth if I could."

I squeezed Fred's hand. I was starting to see red. How dare he speak about Matthew! If he doesn't get down now I swear to God I am going to kill him!

"But, I owe him a lot. He saved my friends from death and he made the world a better place for future generations. For that, I am grateful."

He stepped down and I glared at him as he walked past.

Fred let go of my hand and went to speak.

"I spent two years of my immortal life with Matthew, for as long as I live I will always remember them as the best two years of my life. I was alone in the world, I had no idea what I was or what this new world I found myself in was. I was created for another's desire for vengeance. But my creator and coven were killed and I had no purpose. Then I met Matthew and Leah, they helped me get back some of my humanity, they gave me not a coven, but a family. Matthew was like a son to me. I taught him, I raised him; I did everything a good father should do. My greatest regret in life is that I was too weak to save him, I hope he can forgive me."

He stood down and then...it was my turn.

Everyone was silent as I walked forward to speak. What was I going to say? How could I speak so soon with his loss still so fresh? How do I put into words the grief I was feeling right now?

I stared at the crowd and they stared at me. I felt small rain drops on my skin, it was starting to rain.

"He was my son...and I miss him."

I went to join the others. It was funny wasn't it? I loved him the most yet my speech was the shortest. What else could I say? If I went on how much I loved him and how he changed my life we would be here for a while.

It was short, but it got to the point. I loved him and would miss him for the rest of my life. Sometimes words can't be used to describe the amount of pain you feel when a loved one dies.

They lit the fire and the herbs and flowers they put on it burned. The air was filled with the sweet smell of burning flowers, the smoke carried the scent far, making it stronger.

Billy spoke in Quileute. Telling the spirits to accept Matthew into the spirit world, that he may find peace. It was raining now, umbrellas were opened and people bowed their heads as he spoke.

Then it was done and over.

Some left right away, others lingered, some to talk, others to watch the fire burn. The fire was strong; as long as it didn't rain hard it would keep burning. Watching the fire brought back really bad memories.

Matthew falling into the chasm, the inferno waiting for him.

I looked away.

I saw Nahuel and his aunt heading for the trees. Some of the wolves followed them.

I ran over to them. "Back off," I said waving them away.

"Sam said to watch them," one of the wolves said.

"Well now I am watching them, now fuck off!" I snapped.

The backed off, stepping back ten feet but not leaving.

I turned to Nahuel. "Where are you going?"

"Home. There is no reason for me to stay," he said.

His voice was so sad, so filled with pain.

"Nahuel...I-"

He put his fingers to my lips. "Joham killed Matthew, you died to save him."

I rubbed my scared arm, taking some small comfort in the feeling of the skin marred by Matthew. It was paler then my body, it didn't stick out too much, but you would notice it. The skin there was about as cool as a humans. I was glad it wasn't ice cold. IT would be a bad contrast with the rest of my skin.

"About us. I know you have feelings for me. Strong feelings. But it won't happen Nahuel. I am sorry, you're cool and wonderful in bed." one of the boys behind me gagged. "One more word and I will break your fucking arms!" I growled at them.

The cowered from me, true fear was in their eyes. Did they really think I would do it? Or have I really just reached a new level of scary? Who cares, as long as they do what I say.

I turned back to Nahuel. "I have no time for romance in my life right now. And I am sick and tired of vampires and all their bullshit. I need to find someone more human, I can't handle any more drama or stress, I am sorry."

He shook his head. "You are right, we would have been great for a while, but some love is like a simple flame, it burns bright but eventually it fades. I would not want to make your list of heart breakers."

I nodded. "Well...good luck...hope everything works out for you."

I turned to leave.

"Leah."

"Yeah?"

I turned to look at him; he was looking at me rather worried.

"I see you are broken now, I am hurting too. But remember you still have friends and family, don't bring them any more pain."

"Whatever," I said.

I continued to walk away, never looking back. I heard movement and knew Nahuel and his aunt were leaving, with the wolves following them.

I walked up to mom and Seth. "I need to run, I'll see you guys later."

No one said anything, they all let me go. When I hit the edge of the woods I looked back at the bonfire. It was still going strong. I wish he was here, he loved bonfires. We camped outside in Priddis many times.

Unable to hold it in anymore I ran into the woods, I phased, tearing my clothes to shreds. I had to run, so I ran. I ran, I ran, I ran...I ran.

But no matter how far I ran, the pain was always there.

* * *

Fred P.O.V

I watched her run into the woods.

I wanted to follow her, but she was not in her right mind.

"I should follow her," Seth said.

"No," I said. "She needs to vent. If we follow her she will push us away."

"But, what if she tries to hurt herself?"

"She is not having any suicidal thoughts," Edward said.

Seth had a point though. No one could be close to her...except me.

"I will watch her," I said.

"I thought you said we should give her space?" Seth asked.

"Only if we have someone who can not be seen, heard or acknowledged what so ever."

I used my power. Seth's eyes got big and he looked around. I turned it off and he jumped. "Whoa! I hate it when you do that! It's like I know you are there, but I don't want to know you are there!" Seth said.

"My power is about repulsion. It touches the parts of the brain that deals with aversion and repulsion. I make your brain think I am so repulsive it refuses to even think of me. Leah will be so engrossed in her own thoughts it will be all that much easier."

I took off into the woods, I turned my power on. I followed Leah's scent. It took me a while, but I found her in a cave resting, she was breathing hard and letting out little dog like whines. I knew she was grieving.

I staid by her side. She never knew I was there. She ran a lot, then would stop to rest, then run again. We were both soaked, the rain had begun to come down harder. It was around midnight and the moon was out, the clouds would cover it and send the land into darkness. But every once in a while she would shine her light on the earth.

Leah's fur shined in the moonlight, like pure silver.

She got up and looked at the moon, tears the size of gold balls fell from her eyes. She threw her head back and let out a howl that ringed through the night time sky.

I wanted to hug her; I wanted to tell her I loved her. But I remember what she said to Nahuel. I heard what she said. Any hope I had of their being an us was almost gone now. Leah had changed. I don't think she can ever love again.

But I will stay with her, I will never leave her. Even if she does find some lucky son of a bitch and grows old and dies I will always be there watching her. Her hidden angel in the night.

I listened to her howl. I was sure many people could hear it. I wondered what they would make of it?

* * *

The world's P.O.V

The Quileute have always had a powerful connection to wolves. It is said the tribe is descended from a pair of wolves turned into humans by the creator Q'Wati.

Only a few select now of the story of Taha Aki and the spirit warriors. The Quileutes never share the story with the pale faces, except for a few chosen who have truly earned the right.

Wolves are sacred to them, and it is forbidden for them to be killed.

So it was no surprise that when around midnight just about the whole reservation heard a wolf howl. The Quileutes have heard them all; they knew every tune a wolf had to offer.

But this howl scared then, for there was something to human about it, something that understood pain more than a wolf could. Children, awoken by the howl felt fear and went to their parent's room to sleep with them. The parents let them and would hold their offspring close. A part of their minds recognized that something about the wolf howling had something to do with loss close to the heart.

The shape-shifters knew it was not an ordinary wolf howl. Since they transformed they could understand the wolf language better than any human. They knew it was Leah crying for Matthew. They could feel her pain in her voice. Some of them even shed a few tears.

The council and imprints had heard the shape-shifters howl before and they knew it was Leah, their hearts went out to her. Sue looked out her window, a tear falling down her face.

Sam Uley too stood by his window. Feeling a powerful instinct in his mind begin to surface he began to make his way to the door, but careful so not to wake his love.

"Going somewhere?" Emily asked.

"Em, I am sorry, I didn't mean to wake you," he said.

"How can I sleep? How can anyone sleep with that? Where are you going?" she asked.

"I have to join her, a part of me...the wolf, it's telling me we need to sing."

It had happened before. Sometimes the urge to howl was too great for the shape-shifters to resist and they would howl when they were happy, excited or feeling some powerful emotion they needed to release.

Emily smiled. "I understand, the others will probably join you. Howl extra for me," she said.

"I will."

He kissed her on the head and went to leave the house.

Over at Jacob's he was heading out hos own door when he saw his father.

"Dad?"

"You are going to howl with her aren't you?"

Billy remembered when his old man and his group did the same thing. He knew his son, being the alpha would have a strong desire to howl as well.

"Yeah, I will be back soon."

"Son, you are a grown man. Stay out as long as you need. But make sure you sing your ass off tonight. Give her every bit of support you can muster. She will need it."

Jacob nodded.

He left his house, all over La Push the shape-shifters snuck out from their homes. When they were deep in the woods in their wolf forms, they gathered together. Not wanting to disturb their sister in her moment of solitude.

Together in unison they threw their heads back and howled with her. Sharing her pain.

La Push was filled with the sound of howling shape-shifting wolves. The locals would be shaken a little by it, many ghost stories would be made to explain the loud howling Leah never paused howling. But she did cry, thankful for the support of her friends.

Fred's eyes burned. He was glad it was raining. The water falling on his eyes and sliding down his face helped him feel like he was.

* * *

Despair: To lose all hope or confidence.

Example: After Matthew's death, Leah falls further into despair.

Leah P.O.V

Weeks later and I had not improved.

I had not found relief, or closure or any kind of comfort. I was anti-social, never leaving my room and not talking to anyone.

Many had tried, all had failed, when I got tired of them I yelled at them, called them names. In the end they left me alone in disgust.

I and Seth had a major fight one day, Seth tried to bring me out of my funk, but I fought him. Literally, I punched him in the face and we both phased.

Suffice it to say mom was not happy when she got home.

The Volturi were true to their word and La Push received an anonymous donation. We made the news. Everyone wanted to know what saint sent a check with that many zero's to a small reservation?

Although the council was loathed to take it they had no choice. What reason could we give for refusing the money?

'Yeah, this came from a bunch of blood sucking vampires we helped save, but we don't want it.'

Yeah, that would go over well. The plus side was the money was well used. We used it to renovate many tourist attractions, and buildings of special significance. The schools were given new kinds of books. La Push received a serious upgrade in the educational department.

I should be happy, but I can't find anything in me that should be happy. I have been trying to sleep, even my body needs it. But I always have nightmares. I haven't been eating as much, only when the pain is too great for me to bear do I give in.

But then I decided...I have had enough.

You hear that world? You win. I Leah Clearwater give up. I can't take this shit any more. Sam, dad, Matthew. It's too much. Funny thing about dad is I don't feel any guilt, though I still miss him.

Today I die. Today I finally let death have me. I already died once, it is only right I go back. It's only right I re-establish the natural order of things.

I have tried, I really have. I have patrolled. I am still an independent alpha female. But I have to do something.

I have tried talking about it, but it is only repetition, it never gets any easier. I hated being around people. They were so happy and I hated it. How can there be any happiness when Matthew is dead? I hate how they look at me. Pity, sympathy. What do they know? They don't know my pain.

So yeah, I have tried, but I am just so tired. I can't go on, I need to rest. I need to sleep. I need to escape the world and all the pain and suffering.

So first I wrote a letter. It was for everyone. I was going to write something very depressing and angry but I didn't want to leave something hate filled behind.

So I simply told everyone I loved them all, hell I even included Sam and Emily. I told them all I was sorry and not to blame themselves. I did the best to explain why I am doing it, and all I can do is hope they understand. Some emotions just can't be put in written form. I told Seth to keep on going and to take care of mom and to be stronger then I ever was.

I sealed the envelope and locked my door and jumped out the window. I walked inside, mom and Seth were watching TV.

"Leah, what are you doing?" mom asked.

I hugged her and then Seth.

"I love you both, I just wanted you to know that. I know...I have not been right and I am sorry for making you suffer. I hope you can forgive me."

"Leah, we're just glad you are finally talking to us," mom said.

"Yeah, we are so worried about you. We're always talking about what to do about you," Seth said.

"Well don't worry, I will be fine." I put on a fake smile. "Hey Seth, you know Jerry Slawn?"

"The old drug dealer?" he asked.

Jerry Slawn went to my school. He was about my age but sold weed and pills in school. He didn't do much with his life after he graduated except selling more drugs. Until Sam scared him straight.

"Yeah, he still living in his old house?"

"Yeah, Sam is getting ready to talk with him. Apparently he has been up to no good again."

"Perfect, I will go handle it," I said.

"Sam said he would-"

"Yeah, he tried once and failed. This needs a woman's touch."

"Leah," mom said sternly.

I rolled my eyes. "I promise I won't kill her or physically harm him," I said.

I turned around and headed out the door. "I love you guys," I said.

I knew where to go next. I phased and ran to Jerry's. Hopefully he would have what I needed. I wanted to go out peaceful. I wanted to leave something behind for them to bury. I didn't want to do the whole cut wrists, I would heal long before I died of blood loss, I would heal instantly.

Jerry lived in a crappy little house. His parents had been drunk and violent. I guess it helped explain why he was such a dick.

I could hear him inside. The TV was on loud, why was he watching cartoons?

I knocked hard on the door. "Open up!" I yelled.

I kept on pounding until it opened. Jerry was rather attractive, he had heavy bags under his eyes though, like he had been staying up late a lot. I could smell the weed on him; I knew he was dealing again. "Leah Clearwater?" he asked when seeing me.

I pushed him inside and closed the door.

"What the fuck!"

I slapped him across the face. It wasn't hard by my standards but he fell to the ground. He cut his lip and it bled pretty bad. "What the fuck!"

I placed my foot on his chest and added pressure. He wheezed for breath. "You have been a bad boy Jerry, Sam warned you about dealing," I said.

"So you did join that freak!" he said. "I would have never guessed you of all people would join that cult!"

"Sam isn't a cult; he is a man the likes of which you could never hope to be!" I growled.

"Ple-please you're hurting me!" he said. He tried to get my foot off, but I was much stronger then him.

"Tell me where all your drugs are! I want all your pills!"

"Alright follow me!" he said.

I let him up and followed him into the kitchen. I could hear Sponge bob playing in the living room. I guess pot heads like watching cartoon shows.

He led me into his kitchen and bent down to the cabinet below the sink. There was a padlock on it. Probably didn't want anyone to steal from him. He undid the lock and opened it up. He began to pull out dozens of pill bottles.

"Where the fuck did you steal all this?" it had to be stolen.

"Pharmacy. Got a job there."

"Doing what?"

"Janitor." was all he said.

I looked at the bottles. I knew enough about medicine to ditch the weak shit.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"Have any booze?" I asked.

"Moonshine."

"Hand it over," I said.

He went into his fridge and grabbed a bottle of moonshine and handed it to me. "I am taking these," I said showing him what I was taking.

I took out five bottles of Ketamine.

"Why just those?" he asked.

I pushed him against the fridge. I grabbed him by the throat and lifted him into the air.

"None of you concern. You know it's trash like you that give us a bad name. Sam was good enough to give you a second chance and you threw it away. Well no more chances. I won't let you corrupt any more children with your poison."

He stared at me in horror. "No...please...I...can't...die!"

"Want to bet?" I asked.

"Stop!"

My head snapped to the side. A little boy of six stood in the door way to the kitchen. He was crying. "Leave daddy alone."

"Daddy!" I said shocked.

I let Jerry fall and backed away from him. The little boy went running to his father and stood protectively over him. "Leave him alone! I hate you!"

It made sense now. The cartoon show blaring so loud. It wasn't Jerry who was watching it, it was his kid.

"You have a son?" I asked Jerry horrified. Of all the people to have a child, why him? He was a fucking drug dealer!

Jerry took his boy in his hands, he looked at me like I was the devil, he held his son protectively, funny seeing as how I always thought he was a spineless turd.

"I did stop, I really did. But then his mother dropped him off two years ago. Some chick I...met at a party. I didn't know I had a kid. She left him here, I can't find her. I could barely support myself let alone someone with his condition."

"Condition?" I asked.

He nodded. "He has weak lungs. I couldn't afford to get him the medicine he needs so I had to go back to selling. Otherwise..." he trailed off unable to finish. "Please, I know I am far from father of the year. But he is the only good thing in my life. I had such a horrible child hood I don't want to be like my parents were. It's the only way I can save him."

Tears began to fall from my eyes. A parent protecting their child. God fucking damn it all to hell! I was supposed to be a protector, now look at me. Beating up on drug dealers and scaring kids.

I took a deep breath.

"Two things. First, you will contact my mother, she is a nurse and a council member, tell her your situation, she will help."

"Thank you. I don't want to sell them; I want to be a good example but desperate times and all."

"Second...you have to promise you will always love and care for him. You will give him big hugs and lots of kisses; you will read him bed time stories and never hurt him in any way. Because if you don't I swear to God nothing will stop me from finishing the job."

"I swear I will, I love him. I really do."

Tears fell from his eyes and he actually began to cry. I felt shame for what I have done, but this was to close to home for me.

His son wrapped his arms around his father's neck.

"I love you daddy, you're the best daddy in the whole world."

I grabbed the bottle and the pills and I left the house. I ran for the woods, tears running down my face. The world is so fucked up! I am glad I am going to die! Fuck this place and all the pain! I want out.

I swallowed every pill in every bottle and I downed the bottle of moonshine. Ketamine is a powerful drug. Plus it works fast. I wasn't sure if five bottles would kill me. It was way more than enough to kill a human, but the whole shape-shifter healing factor puts a kink in things.

Leah Clearwater, taken down by a fucking pill.

* * *

Fred P.O.V

I made my way to Leah's house, I was using my power to the wolves would not know I was here. I had been doing this for a while now, silently following her. It was stalkerish but I had to be near her.

I wasn't going to let something happen to her again.

I jumped up to her window and went in. Oddly her scent went from the window to the ground. She wasn't home, I heard Seth downstairs with his mom. I was going to leave and follow her scent when I noticed something on her desk.

It was an envelope. Forgetting the right of privacy I picked it up. It was not sealed. A feeling of dread creeped into my stomach and I pulled out the papers. All I had to do was read the first sentence and I knew the seriousness of the situation.

I went to the door, it was locked but that didn't stop me, I ripped it off it;s hinges and went running downstairs.

"SETH!" I yelled.

Seth came running from the living room as did his mom, Seth looked ready for a fight, his teeth bared, but he calmed down when he saw it was me.

"Fred?"

"Where is she!" I yelled.

"Leah?"

"Yes we have to find her!"

I handed him the note, it didn't take long for the look of horror to shape his face. He went pale and his hands shook as he read.

"Seth what is it?" Sue asked.

"Mom, Leah has gone to kill herself! It's a suicide note!"

"Oh God! I will call Sam and Jake!"

Sue ran into the living room. I heard her dial a number and talk to Sam. He quickly hanged up and she dialed Jake's number.

"Did she say where she was going?" I asked.

"Jerry Slawn, he is a drug dealer!"

"Let's go!"

We quickly ran out the house and for the woods. Seth didn't wait to phase. There was no time to loose. Soon the sound of howling wolves could be heard and I knew all the wolves were out looking for her.

We followed her scent to the drug dealer's house, she wasn't there, her scent went back into the woods so we followed it. I could scent a strong alcohol like substance. We found discarded pill bottles.

It was Ketamine. She took five bottles worth of ketamine and dawned alcohol!

Seth whined when he saw the bottles. "No wonder she wanted to see a drug dealer," I said. I tossed the bottle to the ground. "Come on, we have to find her!"

We continued to follow the scent, it was leading to the cliffs. The idea of Leah there while she was drugged up did not bode well.

I just hope we were not too late.

* * *

Leah P.O.V

I felt tired.

The world was spinning, but I kept on walking. I didn't feel good, I fell to the ground and threw up. The taste of moonshine flavored vomit is the absolute worse by the way.

I had hoped to go out quick and painless, but it didn't matter, this pain was insignificant when compared to the pain I felt at his loss.

I was starting to see thing, hear things. Ketamine can do that, cause hallucinations. I was all paranoid, I kept on thinking I heard something behind me but there was nothing there.

I was feeling an extreme form of vertigo, I could barely walk. The damn world kept on spinning. I wonder what they will do when they find my body. Cry I guess. I wonder who will speak at my funeral? What will be said. 'She was a cold heartless bitch,' some would say. 'She was a good girl, just lost,' others would say.

They would all be better off without me though. I was such a drag, always bringing people down with me in my suffering. La Push is better off without me. I am sure once I am gone they will understand, they will see how better they are without me to ruin things.

I thought I heard howling, I wasn't sure. I didn't know if it was real or not. Damn ketamine was fucking my senses up bad.

" _Leah,"_ a voice whispered.

I stopped. "Hello?"

" _Leah."_

"Look, whoever you are I am not in a good mood to be fucked with!" I warned.

" _But Leah."_

He moved from behind a tree. Wearing just a pair of black shorts, his hair long and wild. He had his head cocked to the side, looking so innocent.

"Matthew?" I whispered.

He raised his head and sniffed the air. A big goofy grin on his face. _"Come on Leah, I smell the ocean!"_

"Matthew wait!"

He turned and ran off into the woods.

"Matthew stop!" I yelled.

I tried to run after him but the damn tree roots and rocks kept on causing me to trip. That and the vertigo I was feeling.

"Matthew come back!" I called.

He never stopped, all he did was giggle and laugh and call me to follow him. _"Come on Leah, catch me if you can!"_

I continued to stumble after him. I heard the ocean long before I saw it. I smelled it in the air. I broke through the trees and I was at one of the cliffs. Matthew stood at the edge, his back to me.

" _Leah, it is being pretty,"_ he said.

I walked forward, I stood right next to him, he held out his hand and I took it. He seemed so light, like he was made out of air.

"I promised you I would show you the ocean didn't I?" I said.

He smiled.

" _You kept promise Leah, it is just like you were saying...but why are you not keeping other promise?"_

"Huh?"

He looked at me, his face sad.

" _You promised you would live Leah."_

"I did no such thing," I said looking out at the ocean.

" _But what about your family Leah? Seth-Seth and your mommy. Why do this to them?"_

"Because I am weak, I can't take it any more Matthew. Why would I want to be in a world where you are dead?"

He smiled like I was being silly.

" _Leah, you know you don't want to die. You still have so much to live for. You must go on, for Fred-Fred, Seth-Seth, Sue-Sue, and even that jerk off Sam."_

"Language!" I scolded.

He giggled.

" _Leah, life is hard. It can be cold, unfair, filled with pain and sorrow. But it can be such a wonderful place. Filled with warmth and love. You just have to know where to look. I may be gone but my love for you isn't. And you still have a family and friends which is more then what some people have. You have been through so much Leah, don't let it end like this. Move on with your life."_

I began to cry. "But what am I going to do? What am I going to do with out you?" I asked.

" _Live, for me Leah. Live for Matthew. Find love, get a job, get married, have lots and lots and lots of kids. Grow really old and wrinkly and die. Keep going on Leah, you are more important then you know."_

I put my hand to my. "I'm sorry, I am so sorry." I wasn't sure what I was apologizing for. For not saving him, for trying to commit suicide.

" _Silly Leah. Take care nows, Matthew be seeing you agains one day."_

"But-"

I dropped my hand. He was gone. My hand gripped nothing but air. He was never there. It was all just a hallucination.

I brought my hand to my face and sniffed it. Nothing. No sign of him.

For one wild moment I had hoped he was alive, that God had decided to return him back to me.

I looked out at the ocean, saw the sunlight shine off the water and I had a realization. I didn't want to die. I can't die. He was right, I still had so much to live for.

My family, my friends. How could I put them through something like this? Was I really so self-centered to think my death wouldn't hurt them, after everything they have gone through for me?

I had been so immersed in my own pain I had lost touch with the world. No wonder everything was so dark, I had closed my eyes but the truth was in front of me the whole time.

I had so much to live for. And I would. I would not piss away his sacrifice.

"Matthew, I don't know if you can hear me. But I want you to know I love you and I promise I will get my shit together. And also, I miss you, so very, very much."

I went to turn around but I was closer to the edge then I thought. I was still dizzy so I made a misstep and found myself tumbling over the cliff.

I screamed and caught onto a rock. I gripped it as tight as I could. I looked down and saw a bunch of nasty looking rocks ready to have me fall on them and more than likely end me.

"Help! Someone help!" I screamed.

Great! Just fucking great! Not only was I going to die but I was going to die right after I decide to not kill myself, what the fuck!

"Leah!" a voice called.

It was Fred's voice!

"Help! Fred help me!" I yelled.

I heard mighty footfalls and knew one of the wolves were coming. I saw Fred's face and Seth's wolf head look down, botht ehir faces a mask of horror.

"Leah what are you doing!"

"Trying not to fall moron!" I yelled.

"Don't jump, I am coming down!" Fred called.

"I am not going to jump now get me the fuck up out of here!" I yelled again.

Fred began to climb down. Seth phased. "Don't do it, you have so much to live for!"

I rolled my eyes, did I look like I was suicidal!

"I am not suicidal!"

"We found your note Leah, if you jump I am coming after you!" Fred said as he climbed closer.

"Idiot if I was going to kill myself I would have just jumped! And would I be holding on for my life?"

I wasn't feeling good, I felt like I was going to throw up.

"Hurry, I took a load of pills...I don't know how much longer I can last," I said.

He climbed down next to me. "I thought you weren't suicidal?" he asked, looking madder then I have ever seen him.

"That was then; I had a change of heart."

"Climb onto my back," he said.

I put a shaky hand around his neck for support. Then I moved my leg over his hip. I climbed onto his back and held on tight. We began to climb up and I closed my eyes, it helped keep the vomit down.

We got to the top and he walked away from the cliff. I was going to climb off but he dropped me on the ground.

"What the fuck!" I yelled glaring at him.

Shit why was I seeing three Fred's?

"What the fuck! I should be asking that! You were going to kill yourself Leah!"

I looked away ashamed.

"Look at me!"

He kneeled down and grabbed my shoulders and shook me roughly. "You were going to do that to me? To your family?"

I looked at Seth, a look of great pain was on his face. "Were you really going to do it Leah?" he asked.

"God, Seth...I am so sorry!" I cried. "I couldn't do it any more, it was too much...I just couldn't bear it any more. But I realized what I was doing was wrong. I realized I had a lot to live, for. I realized I would disgrace his memory if I killed myself, that his sacrifice would be in vein. I am so sorry guys...please...I...I took a lot of pills and..."

"Leah, whats-" Fred began.

I threw up. A lot. And this time instead of having a nice little spot on the ground to puke on I vomited all over Fred. The entire front of his shirt and pants were covered in my vomit.

"Sorry, I took a shit load of pills and moonshine; I think I need to see a doctor."

Fred had a huge angry scowl on his face. Then it broke out into a smile and he began to laugh. "Ha, ha, ha. Look at us now, can you imagine what he would say?"

"Leah! You are throwing up on Fred-Fred," I said mimicking Matthew.

He laughed and I laughed. I leaned my head on his shoulder. "Will it ever get easier?"

"Little by little, it will." he kissed me on the cheek. "But if you think I am letting you out of my sight again you are wrong. I don't care if you need space or not. You are going under lock down missy."

"That's okay, I am tired of being alone," I said.

"Come on, let's get you home."

Seth and Fred helped me stand and they began to drag me home. "Hey Seth, did you know Jerry has a kid?"

"What?" he asked his eyes wide.

I told him the whole situation with Jerry.

"Man, I always thought he would be a dead beat dad."

"Being a parent can change you," I said. "Seth...sorry I punched you and hurt you. I really do love you. I know I hurt you bad...I was selfish I know. Please forgive me. You've always supported me even when I treated you like shit. I promise things will be different...I don't want to die alone."

Seth sighed. "Being your brother can be such a pain in the ass."

My heart dropped.

Then he smiled. "But it's so worth it."

I smiled back at him.

The wolves found us. Sam got all in protective mode and had a stand off with Fred. He was upset Fred was running around La Push without permission, it wasn't until Fred pointed out that his running around saved my life.

They started to argue and it wasn't until I pointed out I was pumped full of drugs they stopped and worked on getting me home.

"Carlisle is on his way," Jake said, "he said we might have to pump her stomach."

"Fucking fantastic," I muttered.

Jake glared at me. "The second you are on your feet I am knocking you on your ass!" he growled.

"Take a number Black...now back up before I puke all over you!"

They all backed away as I hacked my guts out.

I looked up and saw Matthew standing next to a tree. He smiled and waved at me.

" _Live Leah, for me."_

He disappeared and I smiled.

"I will, I promise," I said.

"Leah, who are you talking to?" Sam asked.

"A hallucination of Matthew brought on by the drugs which helped me realize killing myself would be really stupid...they're really strong drugs."

He sighed and wiped the drool off my chin with his knuckles. "You scared me Leah, I swear if you ever do that again, alpha or no alpha we will tussle."

Is snorted. "Please, I would kick your ass you pussy."

He grinned. "There is the Leah I know."

They carried me home. Carlisle was there and yes, we did have to pump my stomach. Not a fun filled day.

I cried with mom and we hugged. I apologized and she just held me and told me everything would be okay.

They cleaned me up and put me in my room. Mom and Seth tucked me in, each kissed me on the head.

I could hear the wolves outside my room. A precaution. I could also hear everyone talking about how they would have to take care watching me and shit. Great. I was on lock down now.

I felt a pair of cool fingers move my hair. I knew it was him before I opened my eyes.

He looked down at me with a soft sad expression.

"Hey," I said.

"Hey," he said.

"I saw Matthew."

"I heard."

"I mean, it wasn't him. I think it was my subconscious telling me to stop being such a whiny bitch."

"Glad you listened to it," he said.

I scooted over to the other side of the bed. He got into bed with me and draped his arm over my side.

"Fred?"

"Yes?"

"You're not going to leave me to are you?" I asked.

He kissed my head. "Never. I will be with you forever."

I smiled.

"I am glad."

I closed my eyes and I fell asleep. That was the first night in a long time, I didn't have a nightmare.

Instead I dreamed of Matthew. Rosemary was right. Memories can be so powerful they are never truly forgotten. And I know, no power on this earth will ever make me forget Matthew Clearwater.

My boy, my son.

I will remember his smile, his laugh, the sound of his voice, how he loved chocolate, how he liked to run around in nothing but a pair of shorts, how he smelled, how he felt in my arms as he slept.

These precious memories were all I had left that proved he once existed and for a while I was a mother, with the best son in the world.

And I would carry those memories with me until the day I died, until I was ready to meet my boy. When the time was right.

 

**Fusedtwilight: Leah almost killed herself, thank God for epiphanies. Everyone got to share their thoughts and ideas on Matthew and everyone got to say their goodbye. Only one more chapter to go before the end. How will it end? How will it complete this story? How will the shadow man play a role in the last chapter?**

**Stay tuned for the last chapter and please review.**


	33. Chapter 33

Focused Madness

Chapter 33

**Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing.**

**Well the time has come for Focused Madness to end. It seems like only yesterday I began to type this on my computer. It has been a long and emotional journey. One I am glad to have shared with all of you.**

**Although it is a rather short chapter to be the last, I think it will leave you all pleased.**

 

 

Choice: The act of choosing, the power of choosing, a care in selecting.

Example: Matthew's choice at the crossroads will affect his life.

Matthew P.O.V

The wagon stopped and I got off.

"Are you sure you will not come with us? You will be most welcome," Roman said.

"Yes, come with us Matthew!" his youngest son said. A boy of seven.

I smiled and shook my head. "Thank you all. But I need to head off now," I said.

Roman and his family looked surprised. They were a group of nomadic Gypsies that had found and cared for me. I was lucky some of them spoke English, even if it was with a heavy accent.

"Come with us, you are too young to be all alone," Roman's wife, a heavy set woman in her fifties pleaded.

"Thank you, but this is where we must part. Thank you all so much for your hospitality," I said.

Roman reached out with his hand and I shook it. "Before we go we have something for you."

His eldest son handed me a bag. I looked inside and found clothing, some bread and even money. "Roman I can't take the money," I said.

He shook his head. "We do not need it. Please, take it. It will make us feel better about leaving you here alone."

They were all nervous; I could see they did not want to leave without me.

I would need the money and the clothes. Deciding to take necessity over politeness I took the bag. "Thank you Roman, for everything," I said.

"Take care, Matthew. I hope you find what you are looking for."

"Me too."

I looked over to Roman's mother. An old woman in her eighties but was still sharp and youthful. We shared a look and nodded to one another. She was not too worried for me, she knew what I was and that I could take care of myself. She gave me a toothy smile and I smiled back.

Roman slapped the horses with the reins and the wagon began to move forward. Everyone waved at me, saying farewell. I waved back. I would miss them. I have been with them for over a week. They are nice people.

Roman's daughter blew me a kiss and I blushed. She had been taken with me, but I did not return her affection.

I waited until the wagon was a tiny spot in the distance before I looked around. I was at a crossroads. Literally. I was in a vast field that broke off into four paths. Which was fitting seeing how I had a big choice to make.

I took a moment to reflect on how I got here. I should have died, but fate had other ideas for me.

* * *

_I fell into the chasm._

_I was so afraid. Leah was so filled with horror at what was happening. They all were. But this was for the best. Leah would not leave me to die and I would not let her die for me. Not again._

_I felt the fire lone before I landed. I felt like I was in hell. I hit the ground hard and blacked out; when I came too I was burning. I tried to stand up but the flame was everywhere, every part of my body burned._

_I heard the sound of something massive falling; I looked up and saw a massive boulder falling. Ignoring the pain I ran through the fire, when it landed I fell to the ground from the shock of the impact. A chunk of rock broke from it and hit me in the back._

_I fell to the ground; every part of my body was in pain right now. I felt like I was being tortured by that little brunette from the Volturi again._

_The fire was still burning me. It was everywhere. Hybrids were more durable than humans so it was taking longer for me to burn._

_I never gave much thought to how I would die, but I kind of hoped it would be quick and painless._

_Something picked me up and began to carry me. I could sense his pain; I already knew who it was before I passed out._

_When I woke up I was burning bad. I could hear fire, but not the inferno. I could hear rumbling in the sky like thunder. I looked up and saw in the distance fire falling from the sky._

" _You are awake?" a voice asked._

_He stood, back turned. Watching the fire, his hands clasped behind his back._

" _Joham," I said._

" _Matthew," he said._

_I was confused. I sensed no murderous intent from him, only defeat and resignation._

" _Why didn't you let me burn?" I asked._

_He was quiet for a while. "Perhaps I didn't want to lose another child."_

_I said nothing. It hurt to move, I could fight him off with my power if need be._

" _Why did you kill them Matthew? They were your family," Joham said._

_I ignored him._

" _Nothing to say? Very well then, let's finish this."_

_He turned around and I gasped. His face was misshapen and missing whole chunks._

" _As you can see, although I survived Seraphina's blast, I did not come out unscathed."_

" _You look ugly," I said._

" _Rather rude don't you think?"_

" _You think I care about your feelings right now?" I asked._

" _I liked you better when you were insane, you had manners at least."_

" _So what now?" I asked. "You start again? Go off and breed a new army and try again?"_

" _Don't be foolish Matthew, what female in their right mind would come near me when I am like this?" he asked._

_He had a point, before he could have any woman he wanted. Now, they would run screaming._

" _The dream is over, I came so close. But it is pointless to try and start again. I no longer have the heart. Now we must end this."_

" _What do you mean?"_

" _I mean now you must kill me?"_

_I looked at him in shock._

" _The fire will spread here soon. All you need to do it rip me apart and let the fire do the rest."_

" _You seriously want me to kill you?"_

" _Why not? You killed the others."_

" _That was different," I said defensively._

" _How? You were in a blind rage?"_

" _Yes, alright! I was so mad I wanted them all dead!" I growled._

" _But now that you are calm you are feeling guilty? And you thought I did you a disservice when I stripped you of your memories and emotions. Tell me, how does it feel to be a murder? To kill your own family?"_

_A streak of sadistic pleasure streaked across his aura. Enjoying the guilt and pain I felt for killing the others._

_"Well, you wanted me to be remorseless so why are you complaining?" I asked._

_He chuckled. "That's right Matthew. Hide from the guilt; I am sure your morals will keep you sane enough to accept what you have done."_

" _Before I finish you off, I have one last question...the darkness. What is it?"_

" _You remember when Morphia told us about it?"_

" _I met it in my dreams," I said._

_He had a thoughtful look on his face. "I have no idea. In all my life I have never encountered anything like it. Maybe it is an evil spirit, or maybe a demon from hell. I don't know. But if I were you I would try and keep a low profile. Who knows where this thing is, if it even exists in our world."_

" _Believe me, I won't go within a hundred miles of it," I said._

" _I hope you do Matthew. Before I meet our family, what will you do with your life?" he asked._

" _Why do you care?"_

" _Despite what I have done, I do love you Matthew. Maybe not how you define love, but I still care to know."_

" _I don't know...I can't go back to America...I...I am not right."_

" _You are what you are Matthew. You have great power, do not be afraid to use it to get what you want."_

_I said nothing; let him say what he wants. He has the right._

" _I have no regrets...well, maybe that so many had to die. But I stand by my beliefs Matthew. Never let anyone sway you from your path. Walk this world like a god, for that is what you are. A god, even amongst out kind."_

_I got up and shakily walked up to him._

" _Is that all?" I asked._

" _Yes, good luck Matthew let no one stand in your way."_

" _...Goodbye father."_

_I grabbed his face and bit into his neck. I focused all my madness and rage into killing him and I must admit I did take some pleasure in tearing him apart. The fire was quickly spreading; I tossed his bits and pieces into it._

_A part of me screamed in horror at what I had done, another part screamed in savage triumph._

_When the human planes began to fly above I ran into the woods. My body protested but I had to get away._

_By the time I stopped running I was so tired, I was barely walking. The world was starting to swirl around me. I had to stop._

_Then I heard the sound of a beating heart, I sensed something up ahead. I found a deer and before I knew it I had its neck in my mouth and sucked it of all the blood it had. I was in predator mode, my body needed to heal and the blood helped give me strength to keep on going._

_I continued to stumble through the woods, refusing to give in. I had to keep on pushing forward, I had to. I had to return to Leah, I knew she would be sad, so sad._

_The sun was starting to rise. I could hear many heart beats up ahead, I could smell humans. The idea of all that blood waiting to be taken made my mouth water._

_I could see a wagon and people up ahead. There were children playing, some adults were talking. Who should I go for? The adults or the children?_

_I was so hungry, yet so tired._

_I broke through the trees, the second the children saw me and they ran for the adults. They huddled behind them, looking at me with terrified eyes._

_The adults looked at me with wide shocked eyes. I imagine I still look a bit burned from the fire. I stopped and stared at them and they stared at me. I was so hungry, I could kill them all. There blood would make me so much stronger._

_Caution and a small tinge of fear was in their aura._

" _Ma ma, is he going to hurt us?" one little boy asked his mother._

_Something in me rose up. Something kinder, gentler, more human._

" _Help me," I whispered._

_I fell on the ground, giving into exhaustion. The ground felt so soft and comfortable. I could feel movement around me. Someone turned me over and I saw a man hovering over me._

" _Hold on, we will help you!" he said. "Quick get the medicines, he has been badly burned!"_

_I don't know what happened after that, I gave into the sleep my body so needed. My last thought was of my Leah and I hoped she was safe._

* * *

 

I stayed with Roman and his clan since then.

They gave me food and cream that helped the burns. Roman's mother, an old woman with white hair and wise eyes watched over me most of the time.

She knew what I was. The Gypsies have plenty of stories about vampires, even about hybrids like me. The others were amazed at how quickly I healed the burns. They thought it was the cream, but Roman's mother knew the real reason why.

She told me she knew what I was; she said as long as I did nothing to harm her family she would not say anything.

She fed me blood at night. When people were asleep she would come into my tent and feed me goat blood or pig blood. While I fed she would sing me songs of her people.

I asked her why she would care for me if she knew what I was and she told me she was good at reading people. She could tell I had a kind heart and an old soul.

She was special, I could sense it. If she was turned into a vampire I was positive she would have a gift of some kind. Her blood smelled good too, Joham told me that humans who have strong blood usually turn out to be gifted. I wondered how her gift would grow with the vampire venom.

I asked her what she meant by old soul.

" _You have seen horrible things and have done horrible things child. I can see it in your eyes. You have known such pain and sorrow; it clings to you like a perfume."_

I asked her if she knew I did horrible things then why help me?

" _You feel regret, you feel guilt for what you did. It eats you from the inside. Anyone who feels such shame deserves some help."_

She helped me keep my secret. She fueled the others belief it was their medicines that helped me recover so quickly. They all listened to her. She was the matriarch and the wise woman. She had the respect of her family.

When I was well enough I helped out around the camp. Putting the tents up and putting them away, helping them hunt for food and fish. We did not stay in one place for too long, sometimes we would go to towns and villages and do odd jobs to earn money or to trade furs and other things.

The children were home schooled. Their mother was from another clan of Gypsies, only she had gone to an actual school and passed on everything she knew to her children. I helped too. Fred had taught me all the things he learned in school and college and I was able to teach them what he taught me.

Roman helped teach me Italian while I stayed with them, thanks to my vampire genes I was able to remember and process information better then a human could. Three days after my lessons I was a pro. He even taught me Romani, the language of the gypsies. Two languages in one week, I was kicking some ass.

Although I enjoyed the company of the family, they did not know it but they helped me keep the anger and guilt back. Seeing them so together and close knit. It made me remember the Cullens and the Denali coven.

Sometimes I would think of Joham and the others. They may have been his sheep, but they were also a family. They felt pain when one of their numbers died; they felt protective of one another. They were family in some ways.

I missed them. When we played and laughed. Sure there were parts I didn't miss. But had I been more merciful...more sensible I could have given them a better life. Instead I chose to kill them. I gave into my dark impulses and killed them all. My sisters as well.

Kin slaying was believed to be one of the blackest sins. All I had left now was Nahuel, Leah, Fred and the Cullens.

So shouldn't I go to them?

I stood at the crossroads. Left, right, up, down, what path do I take? Where do I go from here? Forks? Priddis? Romania?

As much as I wanted to return to her, I was not the same Matthew Leah had once known. I remembered everything now. The real memories and the fake. I had done something that shattered any innocence I had left and once innocence is lost it can never be regained.

I had some demons I had to deal with before I was ready to see her again. Plus the last time I was in Washington I caused some trouble and I do not think they will be quick to roll out the welcome mat.

Once again I am alone. No Joham, no Leah. No one to tell me what to do. No one to give me purpose.

I took my bag and walked to the center of the roads. Despite the loneliness I feel I also feel a sense of freedom. For the first time in my life my life is my own, I am bound by no one and nothing. I can do as I wish, go where I wish.

Such a bittersweet victory.

The only question is what do I do now?

I look up into the sky and watch the clouds. Should I be a cloud and go where the wind blows me? Surely eventually it would lead me to her again.

Leah, thank you for everything you have done for me. All the sacrifices and pain. I promise I will be worthy of it all. I love you so much Leah, and I know we will meet soon. I just need to figure some things out first.

And Leah, no matter where I am, no matter what I happens I want you to know one thing.

"Leah, I miss you," I whisper.

* * *

The Shadow P.O.V

I wait in the dark, hungry, alone.

I wait in exile, imprisonment.

So thirsty, so many lives out there, I can sense them.

So many lives for me to take, so much light to extinguish.

I have waited so long, suffered here in my prison.

The world has left me behind, forgotten me, but I have not forgotten the world.

I still haunt them, as I did when they young and cowered by their fires with their stone spears.

I haunt them in their dreams, I whisper in their ears.

I make them fear the dark.

But soon I will be free, that fool Joham handed me the keys and he never knew it.

The world has forgotten me, but I will make it remember.

The child will help me, with him I will make everything the way it was, the way it should be.

My emptiness will spread all over the world.

Lovers will savage their darlings.

Mothers will smother their children.

Cities will burn; the world will be soaked in blood.

I will use him to erode the pillars of society and return the world to an age of stone and bone.

A time when they knew of me and they trembled at the idea of me.

But for now I wait.

Soon I will be free and the hybrid will become just another scream in the chorus of my victims.

 

 

 

**Fusedtwilight: And that is all. Matthew is actually alive and alone once again. And to answer the most important question many of you are wondering, yes there will be a sequel.**

**Focused Madness began like all stories do, with an idea. I thought of Leah and how she could have no children of her own. I thought, what if she had to care for a child? Then I thought why would she need to care for the child? Then I thought of ways to make the relationship unusual and special.**

**I thought what if the child came with great responsibility? I thought of ways to make the child special and interesting. Thus Matthew was born. Writing him has been fun, his power gives him a better understanding of people and the world, yet he is such a tragic figure.**

**His whole life he was manipulated by his father and he never knew the true love of a family, until he met Leah. The Volturi's attack on Joham was a blessing, because if they hadn't Matthew would have never met Leah and I fear he would have become another monster child of Joham's.**

**Writing Leah as a mother was tricky. I didn't want her to instantly feel a bond with Matthew, in fact when first meeting him she is ready to kill him, but over time she develops a bond with him that helps her break free and discover who she really is.**

**And, as for Fred. Fred didn't exist in the beginning of the story. Had it not been for The short second life of Bree Tanner there would be no Fred. After reading that book I knew I had to use Fred in one of my stories and I am pleased how well his presence made things.**

**And the shadow man? Who is he? What is he? I already know who and what he is and the planes he has for the world. But those questions will be answered in the sequel, because Matthew and Leah's journey is far from over and they have one last hurdle to over come.**

**The main theme of Focused Madness is the importance of family. Whether it is blood or not family can be a powerful force. Joham did not treat his children or grandchildren as he should have. He taught them to be cold and unforgiving. But it was Leah's bond of love with Matthew that crushed Joham's family, because he underestimated the power of a mothers love for her child. But at the same time sometimes we must take a stand against our family.**

**Leah had to stand up against her wolf brothers to save Matthew, and Matthew had to stand up to Joham in order to find his voice and take control of his own life.**

**Thank you to everyone for reading this story. I hate to make you wait for Leah and Matthew's reunion. I know I am eagerly waiting to write it. Until next time then.**

 


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